Jennifer Aniston’s Lame Product Plugs, Alec Baldwin’s Self-Destruction, and Whitney Cummings’ Racism Rant

Summary

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The Nerve with Maureen Callahan

Episode: Jennifer Aniston’s Lame Product Plugs, Alec Baldwin’s Self-Destruction, and Whitney Cummings’ Racism Rant
Date: October 17, 2025

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Episode Overview

This Friday edition of The Nerve dives deep into pop culture absurdity and scandal with Maureen Callahan’s signature blend of wit, snark, and relentless fact-checking. Maureen is joined by celebrity makeup artist Tim McKay to break down Jennifer Aniston’s cringeworthy product plugs, wraps up the latest trainwrecks from Alec Baldwin and his wife Hilaria, drags Whitney Cummings’ Saudi Arabia comedy defense, and explores what today’s celebrity culture says about fame, hypocrisy, and self-awareness. Listener feedback rounds out the show, reinforcing the podcast’s community spirit and mission to question celebrity mythmaking.

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Main Segments & Discussion Highlights

1. Jennifer Aniston: Relatability Crisis and Shameless Product Plugs

[00:50–17:48]

Dissecting Aniston’s “What’s In My Bag?” (Harper’s Bazaar)

• The Bit: Jennifer Aniston's video meant to show authentic daily essentials, but comes across as “insufferable” as she awkwardly markets Smartwater, her own LolaVie haircare products, P Volve resistance bands, and Vital Proteins—each a paid brand deal.
• Maureen’s Take: “The Smart Water struck me. It’s the first thing she pulls out... so they must be writing the biggest checks to the corporation of Jennifer Aniston.” [09:22]
• Tim McKay’s Reaction: “She has nothing else in her bag… she has her water bottle company that she’s paid to promote and her own hairline… Is anything real? Is anything authentic anymore?” [09:06, 15:09]
• Critical Observations:
  • No personal touches—no books, no magazines; only sponsor products.
  • Aniston’s attempted self-help wisdom ("self care" speeches) reads, per Maureen, as “rich woman’s lament…spoken by a woman whose boyfriend is a hypnotist who published a pamphlet that he calls a book with QR codes in it.” [13:13]
• Quote, Maureen: "The assignment is, Jen, what's in your bag? … give the rest of us a few pro tips!" [14:17]
• On SNL Refusal: Aniston’s retelling of how she rejected SNL “because she thought she was hot shit” comes off as tone-deaf, not self-aware. [17:48]
  • Tim: "That's a little different …not something like, I turned down a job that a lot of people would literally kill to have." [18:16]

Nepotism and School Admission

• Maureen calls out Aniston’s disingenuousness about barely getting into NYC’s LaGuardia “Fame” School, referencing her father’s soap opera stardom and family wealth: “She says she has no idea… On the heels of slamming Nepo babies.” [18:34]
  • Tim: “Maybe her dad had something to do with it.”

The Morning Show Recap

[20:24–25:55]

• Maureen and Tim hilariously catalog Aniston’s acting “tics”—her repetitive stuttering, head touches, and “Tourette’s attack” emoting, contrasting her against showmate Billy Crudup (“the real effing actor on this show”).
• Quote, Maureen: “Jennifer’s tics were like, out of control. All I could think about was you, Tim.” [21:18]
• The narrative highlights the absurdity of Aniston’s character “running the entire network” and the show's detachment from plausible workplace realities.

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2. Alec Baldwin: Car Crash Hunter (“Literal and Metaphorical”)

[50:49–60:38]

The Accident and the Aftermath

• Alec Baldwin crashed his wife's Range Rover, blamed a garbage truck, and gave an Instagram “Oscar speech” to reassure fans—and exculpate himself.
  • Maureen’s Takedown: “Alec Baldwin remains a public menace.…And if this guy winds up killing somebody someday, a lot of people are going to have blood on their hands. What am I saying? He already killed someone.” [56:42, 59:41]
• Maureen’s Insider Knowledge: Exposes the reality of driving in the Hamptons, the logistics of garbage trucks, and the unlikelihood of Baldwin’s claims, supported by dashcam footage contradicting his story.
• Baldwin’s "celebrity justice": Maureen alleges East Hampton law enforcement turns a blind eye to Alec due to his donations and status.

Hilaria Baldwin and “Spanish” Delusion

• Hilaria (Rachel Dolezal of the Hamptons, per Maureen) booted early from Dancing with the Stars; her Spanish act and heavy bronzer only intensified the spectacle.
• Maureen: “Her punishment is that he’s stuck with her until he dies. I’m going to predict of a stress-induced heart attack.” [60:38]

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3. Whitney Cummings and the Saudi Arabia Comedy Fiasco

[61:32–66:18]

Defending a Gigs in “Chop Chop Square”

• Whitney Cummings is confronted for performing in Saudi Arabia, where women’s rights are minimal and the state regularly executes dissidents.
• Her defense is called “a regression of the highest order” with an unconvincing, hyper-defensive tone.
  • Maureen: “Because if you think for a second that a woman your age in Saudi Arabia…enjoys the rights and freedoms you do… you’re a fuckwit. …You just took blood money.” [66:12]
• Recurring Maureen Motif: Excellence in turning celebrity hypocrisy into teachable, biting moments.

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4. SNL Dig at “And Just Like That...” & Celebrity Self-Awareness

[28:03–29:45]

• Sabrina Carpenter’s SNL promo parodies Sex And the City’s quirks and Sarah Jessica Parker’s “adorableness,” with Tim gushing: “That was probably the funniest thing I’ve seen on SNL in I don’t even know how long… I love Sabrina Carpenter.” [28:58]

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5. JLo and the Curse of Trying Too Hard

[33:06–36:15]

• JLo’s new film “Kiss of the Spider Woman” bombs at the box office. Maureen and Tim analyze her desperation to salvage her career and reflect on her transition from talented actress (“Out of Sight”) to flop-prone pop culture punchline.
  • Quote, Tim: “She just keeps trying, and it’s failure. Flop after flop after flop. But Kiss of the Flop Woman.” [33:48]
• Maureen draws cultural parallels with Meghan Markle—never retreating after a failure, always “pushing” despite public disdain.

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6. Listener Feedback & Cultural Reflections

[39:44–49:44]

• Maureen reads poignant, funny, and critical emails from listeners.
  • Notable topics: Ryan Reynolds’ arson “jokes”, nepotism in celebrity, the difference between old and new fame (“fame is the fast pass to achieve authority”), the Lisa Marie/Priscilla Presley dynamic, and the moral vacuity of today’s celebrity class.
• Quote, Listener Laura: “Somewhere along the way, celebrity stopped being a byproduct of achievement and became a credential in itself.”

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Notable Quotes & Moments (with Timestamps)

• Maureen, on Aniston’s authenticity: “Is anything real? Is anything authentic anymore?” [15:09]
• On ‘self-care’ platitudes: “The assignment is not to be talking about the internal spiritual work that we’re doing. That, to me, goes to this culture of narcissism…” [14:17]
• On Baldwin crash: “First of all, I love how they dug in like a vowed Trump hater. Like the minute the car hits the tree…as if it’s sort of like a thing from the gods.” [56:42]
• On Whitney Cummings’s defense: “You just took blood money. Just say it. Just say it. Say, I love money; I can’t get enough money and I’m willing to throw morals and values out the window…” [66:12]
• Tim, about SNL’s dig at SJP: “That was probably the funniest thing I’ve seen on for SNL in, like, I don’t even know how long. I…loved it.” [28:58]
• Maureen, philosophical summary: “Emotional performance gets mistaken for emotional intelligence. Not with the troublemakers, though. We’re all onto it. A well-lit monologue passes as leadership. A brand partnership looks like wisdom.” [Listener email, ~44:00]

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Additional Highlights & Easter Eggs

• Smartwater, P Volve, Vital Proteins: Dissecting how “relatability” is cannibalized by calculated brand deals.
• Cat content: Cynthia Nixon’s obese cat and the wellness hypocrisy of self-proclaimed “socialist” celebrities. [29:45–31:36]
• Rom-com nostalgia: Tim and Maureen long for the return of the classic feel-good romantic comedy (“the golden age of rom coms”). [35:50–36:50]
• Running gags: Wood chipper as metaphorical punishment for celebrity offenses; “troublemaker” community engagement.

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Summary & Takeaways

Maureen Callahan continues to make The Nerve essential listening for those who enjoy pop culture with a sense of skepticism and a hunger for truth-telling. Whether skewering the hollow performativity of Jennifer Aniston, exposing the self-serving evasions of Alec Baldwin, or eviscerating the ethical pretensions of Whitney Cummings, Maureen and her guests remind listeners why star culture deserves to be questioned and, often, laughed at.

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For full rants, real talk, and the community of “troublemakers,” subscribe at thenerve.com and join the ongoing conversation.

Transcript

[Narrator/Advertiser]

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[Maureen Callahan]

Hey, everyone, and welcome to your Friday edition of the Nerve. We've got so much good stuff. It is but bubbling up and out of our cauldron for you. Okay, first, Jennifer Aniston. Jennifer Aniston. Counter to the stories pushed on us by People magazine, Entertainment Tonight, Us Weekly, all manner of podcasts, this woman has become insufferable. Insufferable. Now, this is only my opinion. Others are not as, how would I say, like, ready to go to the woodshed with it, okay? But nonetheless, Tim McKay, who you guys know as Tim the celebrity makeup artist, is here to maybe push back on me a little bit. But nonetheless, he's going to break it all down with us. And it's great. It's great that we have Tim here today because we're gonna start with a video of Jennifer Aniston showing us what's in her beauty bag. And trust me when I tell you, this will not disappoint. Okay? And he'll also be doing a little morning show recap with us before we dive into a very pointed SNL show promo. And I don't think we've ever seen something quite like this. And this one goes after one of our favorite repeat offenders. Plus updates on Alec Baldwin, the car crash, literal and metaphorical that his life has become. Plus his fake Spanish wife's latest bullshit. And we've got some behind the scenes with JLo. Whitney Cummings gets rabid. And lots more, including, as always, your feedback. So are you ready? Are you ready to get the weekend going with a little wood chipper action? Maybe? So are we. So let's go. D Did you know that Utah and Florida both banned fluoride in their water supply? A JAMA pediatric study that's one of the top medical journals found fluoride levels over 2 milligrams per liter can drop children's IQ by more than 2 points. This cannot be ignored. And that is why people are turning to Cove Pure to purify their water. It is a countertop filtration system. No drilling, no plumber. Fill it with tap water, plug it in, and it works. Their Clearwave technology is lab certified to remove up to 99.9% of impurities. That's fluoride arsenic forever chemicals leaving pure clean water. Cof. Pure water tastes incredible, crisp and fresh. Plus it comes with a one touch temperature control so you can get your water hot, cold or warm instantly. Clean water is one of the best investments you can make for yourself and your family. For a limited time, go to covpure.com nerve to get $200 off your purchase. That's C-O V E P U R E.com nerve to get $200 off covpure.com nerve now, before we get to our first offender, I. I need to address this up top. After our most recent full nerve, the nerve at night, which we love. That you guys are loving, we saw in the comments section, you know, we took apart Ryan Reynolds on Seth Meyers joking about death and destruction and violence and his little kids doing dark stuff. And him doing dark stuff. Anyway, we saw, strangely, a number of pro Ryan Reynolds comments on our YouTube channel and elsewhere. And these comments, some in substance, were basically saying that I am very mean for calling Ryan out. And most of these were to the effect of, hey, what's wrong with a little arson? What's wrong with it? Oh, the other one. Hey, Maureen, you're pretty dumb for not knowing this, but arson is a standard part of childhood development, okay? It is not. That is when you know you have a budding serial killer on your hands. I'm not saying that that's what Ryan was. I'm just saying that's when most people would be calling the creme de la creme of child shrinks. Now listen, Ryan, we know you're in the comments section. We know it's you or your paid bots. Or maybe you've conscripted your kids when you're not making them say little vulgar, sexualized things like you did with your daughter in Deadpool vs. Wolverine. Nice try. Okay, now, first of all, I have it on very, very good Authority that Ryan and Blake's people keep tabs of everything that's said about them every, everywhere. So I am very excited for them to hear me say this. Canada. Canada. The township, the province, the school that Ryan Reynolds burned down as a teenager. Sue Ryan Reynolds. Sue him for setting the fire that destroyed that elementary school, burned it to the ground. Something he jokes about now leaving the entire student body without a place to go. The criminal statute of limitations may be up, but I'm pretty sure with the right lawyers and the right pressure that Ryan could be convinced to make a hefty donation to that school and that township or that province in the spirit of making things right. Because wouldn't Ryan want to do that? Wouldn't Ryan Reynolds, good guy extraordinaire, want to make shit right? Right. Okay, now on to the fun stuff. Jennifer Aniston did this little video for Harper's Bazaar magazine after her full photo shoot and profile. And, you know, this is meant to be a very sort of intimate, personalized look at somebody very famous. What's in my bag? Like, I'll show you what's in my handbag. And you know, Jennifer Aniston. And this is part of a larger problem with her. But we're gonna take a look at a few of these clips where Jennifer opens her bag, which, by the way, looks to me. And I would know because, as discussed, I have a shopping problem. It looks like a bag by the row, which is the line that is by Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen. And, like, cost of entry is like five grand. That bag is, I believe, the Margot, which, like, has a $5,000 price tag, so it looks to be brown suede. And we're going to see what Jen's carrying in her bag. What she's just, like, whimsically whipping out. No preparation. None of this was studied or planned or anything. Okay. So we're going to check it out. And on the back end of this first clip, Tim's coming in and we're going to talk. Here we go.

[Jennifer Aniston (clip)]

I mean, obviously, you have to. You need your bottle of smart water to hydrate all day. So that. That obviously comes everywhere with me.

[Maureen Callahan]

Tim, first of all, welcome, welcome. Hi, Maureen. I need to welcome you with all of the verve and warmth you deserve. And as ever, you're looking phenomenal.

[Tim McKay]

Thank you, Maureen. See my beautiful view today that I have.

[Maureen Callahan]

I know you're moving up in the world.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

The nerves.

[Maureen Callahan]

Yeah.

[Tim McKay]

High rise.

[Maureen Callahan]

Exactly, exactly. You're living life of Alex Levy over at the morning show in her penthouse.

[Tim McKay]

Yes.

[Maureen Callahan]

Yeah. So Talk to me about that. That clip where Jen Aniston just happens to whip out an enormous bottle of Smart water. Smart Water, and I believe is employing some of the ticks that you find most annoying.

[Tim McKay]

Oh, my God. I found it funny just that, like, I don't know if this was planned. I mean, she has nothing else in her bag. I mean, I thought it'd be like more cosmetics, but all she had was lip balm. That's like her only cosmetic. And then she has her water bottle company that she's paid to promote and her own hairline.

[Maureen Callahan]

So we're going to get to that. We're going to get to those. But the Smart Water struck me. It's the first thing she pulls out, number one. So they must be writing the biggest checks to the corporation of Jennifer Aniston.

[Tim McKay]

Yeah. You have to have a full water bottle in your bag with you when you go do this interview.

[Maureen Callahan]

Right. Because what woman doesn't love toting around a hefty, enormous water bottle? And I speak as a New Yorker, we carry water everywhere. Like, when you go to Europe or any place outside the US you can always spy the Americans because they've got water bottles. We look like big babies with our bottles.

[Tim McKay]

Yep. Anyway, bigger the better, honestly. But yeah, so I just, I did find that really funny because I was like, oh, it just stood out immediately. I was waiting for her to, like, I said, to pull out makeup and to pull out some fun stuff like I wonder what mascara she likes to wear. It was like, nothing, nothing about that. Because I'm like, I get it that you want to portray. And I. And I love Jennifer Aniston. I mean, I love her. I loved her in the 2000s. I loved her rom com moments, like her mannerisms. Oh, oh, oh. I loved all of it. But I just feel like we know that you don't just wear lip balm. Like, come on. I know that you like to wear your. Your wife. Wife beaters. Can you even say that anymore? Your tank tops.

[Maureen Callahan]

I haven't checked with the tha. Police.

[Tim McKay]

I know I don't know the word police, if they'll come for me for that, but you know what I mean? Tank tops and this very laid back aesthetic. And I'm like, I know you at least put on some concealer. I know you must at least. But you know, maybe she has so many people doing her hair and makeup that she really doesn't carry anything but lip balm. Who knows?

[Maureen Callahan]

That's a great point. Now we're going to take a look at What. What's next? Like, what other rabbit she's pulling out of this margot bag? Let's take a look.

[Jennifer Aniston (clip)]

This is Lola V's dry shampoo. I'm going to do a shameless plug. This is Lola V's hair paste, and then there's Lola V hair oil. So if you're on the go, a. If your hair is feeling a little dirty, obviously this is just.

[Maureen Callahan]

Okay, we can cut that off there, because Jen's doing an ad. She's doing an ad for her own hair care company. Again, like, this is such a wasted opportunity, as you said. You know, show me some of the things that you actually. That are really the objects that you carry around the pieces. Like the little cosmetics that bring you comfort. I mean, Tim, you know, like, my favorite little pieces that, like, I love to carry around. You know what else occurs to me? You know, it's not coming out of this bag. A book. We're not carrying any reading material. We don't have so much as a periodical or a daily newspaper or a Kindle.

[Tim McKay]

Nope. But she has all of her hair care, though. That's for sure.

[Maureen Callahan]

Important things.

[Tim McKay]

I wonder if, like, she. Because I know she was trying to come across like, oh, this is just what I happen to have, but you would think that if it's your own line, you want to at least sound like you know what you're talking about. And I just feel like she maybe should have worked on that a little bit more. Like, maybe been like, this is a dry shampoo. This is the best dry shampoo to take out the oil in your hair. But she sounded like she was a little not confident with it. And I'm like, it's your own line. Come on. At least be a little more private. It's in your bag. We get it. It's a plug. It's not a shameless plug. It's a plug. And we know that. So just.

[Maureen Callahan]

Well, in my estimation, she's never been a great actress. And I think. I wonder if she's feeling a little bit of residual shame for using this really cute video that's supposed to go viral for both her and Harper's Bazaar. And she's like, I'm out here slinging my wares in the marketplace. You know, like, I had no shame. Let's look at the next thing that come out of this bag.

[Jennifer Aniston (clip)]

I think it's one of the most important things that we all should focus on is our self. She's talking physical or beauty. I think it means internal self care, mental self care. Because that way, we are our best selves when we go out there into the world, if we come out, go out there into the world, and we have let ourselves down by. By not taking the best care of ourselves. Whether it's not getting enough sleep, not getting proper nutrition, not getting enough, not taking social media or media breaks in general, we aren't at our best.

[Maureen Callahan]

I'm gonna say two things, and I'm gonna give it to you. One, this is the rich woman's lament. This is the champagne problem of all champagne problems. If you are actually a working person with kids to take care of, or you got a spouse out of work, you got sick parents, I don't know what the freak she's talking about. So secondly, spoken by a woman whose boyfriend is a hypnotist who published a pamphlet that he calls a book with QR codes in it. And thirdly, I don't know what else to say. I don't know what else to say. Tim, you take it.

[Tim McKay]

I mean, I thought she was talking about what she keeps in her bag, so I just think it's funny that she's talking about now taking care of yourself spiritually and mentally and all that good stuff. It just reminds me a lot of the posts that I see on Instagram. A lot of people that, you know, always have to preach about, put yourself first and make sure you keep your mental health in check. It's like, I mean, yeah, we all know that, but again, I want to know what Ms. Gary, you wear, and I want to know what's in your bag. Not, like, your advice for how to take care of yourself. I mean, and we know that as an actress, you care about how you look. So, like, that shouldn't be wiped away. That's the number one thing that we care about when you're on.

[Maureen Callahan]

Agreed. This is the. The assignment is not to be talking about the internal spiritual work that we're doing. And again, that, to me, goes to this culture of narcissism that we've all got going on. The assignment is, Jen, what's in your bag? And as someone who is exposed regularly and has been for the past 30 years, the bulk of your adult life, to the top in hair and makeup and costuming and wardrobe and styling in Hollywood and beyond. Why don't you give the rest of us a few pro tips? All right. But. Nope. Here we go. Here's another. Here's another item that's coming up to go.

[Jennifer Aniston (clip)]

Packet of vital proteins powder that I will probably put in a glass of water. Throughout the day or in a cup of coffee. Don't leave home without that.

[Maureen Callahan]

Well, we don't leave home without that because that's another paid sponsorship that Jen's got going on.

[Tim McKay]

Is that one? Is that. Oh. Oh, come on. Is anything real? Is anything authentic anymore?

[Maureen Callahan]

We got one more, one more coming out of this bag. Tim, brace yourself, brace yourself. It's a real bag.

[Jennifer Aniston (clip)]

I don't know what to tell you. I like to be prepared. So this is my P band. You know, if you're bored, have nothing better to do, sitting around waiting, which happens, or just immature workout gear takes or setups or you're on vacation and. Uhhuh.

[Maureen Callahan]

Okay, we could stop there because this looks like. Frankly, this looks like something that Diddy might have used at a freak off. But that is also another paid, paid thing she's got going on. She's a paid spokesperson for P Volve. She's all over Instagram doing her P Volve workouts. How much money does this woman need? I mean, this is embarrassing. She's got this bag here like you didn't even know. And you love her like vital proteins. That's another one she's shilling for. What is she doing?

[Tim McKay]

Had no idea. And I mean, if it was just a big bag of your promotions and like your sponsored items, that's one thing. But I mean, do you carry just your own products around everywhere every day? Is that what you.

[Maureen Callahan]

I mean, Jen needs to just be for real and honest. She should have been doing that. She should have been suited up like a NASCAR driver with just all over corporations, companies. This is how I get paid. This woman is making at minimum $20 million a year just from friends residuals. How much effing money do you need? Why can't you just try to be relatable now? But she thinks she's relatable. She thinks she's relatable. Okay. Then she went on to Dax Shepard's podcast called Armchair Expert. Now Dax asked her why she repeatedly turned down offers to appear on Saturday Night Live. And Jen said, I always thought I was such hot shit. The story of that is all very confusing. I don't know what's confusing about it. They asked. She said no. And then she took it upon herself to go to Lorne Michaels and tell him he was a sexist pig. I think she thinks this story makes her look both somehow self aware that she always thought she was such hot shit. It wasn't just like a moment in time when she was on fire with friends and. Or that she is. Her feminist, social justice warrior spirit would not be denied even in the face of such an enticing offer. What do you think?

[Tim McKay]

I think it's like kind of one of those things where, I don't know, we all like to look back at when we were younger, like maybe when we were in college or in high school and the stupid decisions that we made and like, I don't know, it's just like, oh, I was such a little a hole back then. Like, I just would. But not when it comes to like a big job that a lot of people would kill to have and say, like, I was. I think that was beneath me kind of thing. Like, I don't know, it's something you'd more say like, oh, you know, I thought I was hot shit. I. I would like walk around in these dresses that didn't fit me.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

Right.

[Tim McKay]

I don't know. Something that's a little more self deprecating. Not like, not something like, I turned down a job that a lot of people would literally kill to have.

[Maureen Callahan]

Yeah.

[Tim McKay]

Because I was too good for that job. I mean, that's a little different. So I think she was trying to be relatable in that, but I think that maybe it just. She doesn't realize some people might get offended by something like that, you know?

[Maureen Callahan]

You know, there was another part of that. Big, big parts of that interview. At least three got picked up by People magazine or Us Weekly. One of which is she talked about getting in by the skin of her teeth to the Fiorello LaGuardia School for Performing Arts here in New York City, which is otherwise known as the Fame School. Timothee Chalamet went there. Madonna's daughter Lourdes went there. And she says in this interview she got in at the very last minute. Like she had been rejected. Rejected. She somehow got in at the very last minute. She was a terrible student by her own account. Terrible, terrible student. To this day, she has no idea how she got in. Actually such a terrible student that she says into her adulthood. And this sounds like when she was on Friends, she would freeze about going into parties or into rooms where there were smart people because she didn't think she could carry on a conversation, which I think holds true to this day, because we talk about three things. Our hair, our makeup, and our wellness. That's it. Okay. Anyway, she says she has no idea. And you know this. On the heels of slamming Nepo babies. Her father was a huge soap opera star. Huge soap opera star. She grew up with money in New York City. Her father also owned a restaurant, and she has no idea how, at the last minute, strings got pulled so she could get into the most famous school for kids who want to be in the performing arts. Tim, can you help me crack this case?

[Tim McKay]

Well, I mean, maybe her dad had something to do with it. I don't know, though. I mean, she has those great. You know, those great mannerisms that we love. Those.

[Maureen Callahan]

Oh, oh, oh.

[Tim McKay]

She had to learn that somewhere, Maureen. And, you know, maybe that's what got her into the school.

[Maureen Callahan]

Okay, well, you know, I'm gonna say something. I'm gonna tease to the mini a little bit with people who are constantly telling us that they look the way they do because they get a lot of water and a lot of rest. Number one. Number two, this. This goes to the most recent episode of the Morning show, which you and I are going to talk about for a little bit here, because Jennifer Aniston's tics were on full display in a scene with Reese Witherspoon in which they're plotting against Billy Crudup's Corey. Billy Crudup, the true star of this show, the real effing actor on this show. And Jennifer's tics were, like, out of control. And all I could think about was you, Tim. You know, she was on the couch going, shoo, shoo, shoo, shoo, shoo. You know, like, it's almost like a Tourette's attack. You know, it's like, this is how we emote. We have one speed as to how we emote.

[Tim McKay]

She loves to stutter. She loves to do the stutter. The. Wait, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Or like. Or the. No, no, no, no, no. Like, she loves to repeat. I don't know if it's a stalling tactic of, like, what's going to come next, but I realize it is one of her ticks. She loves to do the st. Oh, oh, wait, wait, wait, wait. It needs, like, a minute. Like.

[Maureen Callahan]

Yes. And we're always touching the head when we're, like, thinking things through. It's very literal.

[Tim McKay]

Yeah.

[Maureen Callahan]

And always this.

[Tim McKay]

Always the hand.

[Maureen Callahan]

We're breathing a lot. Especially when we're with the bro podcaster who's imaginatively named Bro.

[Tim McKay]

Who's my favorite character? I'm sorry to say it, but he's actually become my favorite character. Now.

[Maureen Callahan]

I'm with you.

[Tim McKay]

He's a great reporter.

[Maureen Callahan]

He's Corey. Aside from Billy Croop's Cory, he's my favorite character. He's.

[Tim McKay]

He's funny. He's like, he's on the nose, bro. But he's like, I don't know. He's a great reporter. He did a great interview.

[Maureen Callahan]

He's a great podcaster, you know, and it's amazing watching Jennifer Aniston, who, by the way, as we discussed, was like, marching all through the halls of UBN in this episode. I'm sorry, we've got Marion Cotillard and Greta Lee as the boss ladies over there, but somehow they've been sidelined. And Jennifer Aniston is running this entire network, you know, yelling at people and making things like asking them why they're doing their jobs. Like when she yelled at the bro podcaster for pulling off an incredible interview, she's like. I'm like, what is this? What is this?

[Tim McKay]

And then she was able to make sure that Mia didn't get her job at another network or that other company. It was like, oh, because Alex got on the phone and I'm like, why does the head anchor have, like, say in who gets a job at another company? And like, unless she really is just the head of UBN now. But they haven't really established that. But I'm like, how did Alex ruin this job? Is that even legal? Like, is that even possible? I don't know.

[Maureen Callahan]

No, I mean, you know, again, much as with Carrie being just a vehicle for Sarah Jessica Parker to live out all of her fantasies, her delusions, Jennifer Aniston is using this show and this character as a vehicle to live out her fantasies and delusions. As a very smart, news minded, critically thinking person, just my opinion. I want to get to what I found. Like the key scene of the most recent episode, which was Corey telling Bradley, with whom he's just begun an intimate romantic relationship that he has longed for. And by the way, I don't understand why the most powerful females on the show all have unisex names. Alex, Bradley, Chris. I don't know what the writers are doing. It's very weird.

[Tim McKay]

I didn't notice that. That's so funny. I didn't even notice that.

[Maureen Callahan]

It's strange. So he finds out that she's been spying on him and is trying to went through his phone, which we all knew he was gonna figure out, and is trying to report a story that would destroy him and ruin his career. And she's trying to salvage herself. Let's take a look at this clip.

[Tim McKay]

Stop pretending to be a human being because what you sound like is a liar. You sound like a fucking liar to me. You don't give a fuck about Me, you know, I spend a long time getting over you. This time's gonna be a whole lot easier.

[Maureen Callahan]

Cory, just get out.

[Tim McKay]

That was the best scene.

[Maureen Callahan]

I love it.

[Tim McKay]

It was the best scene of the episode and maybe of the season so far, because it was like, finally some drama. Like, some. Like, I'm gonna confront you. And it's like. I mean, I think the show needs a murder or something. Like something a little bit more dramatic. But it was the most compelling scene for sure.

[Maureen Callahan]

With Cory, it was the most compelling scene. And I will say this. The writers didn't do the thing that they would normally do, which is string this out over multiple episodes. When will Cory figure it out? Will Rhys be able to out him? You know, and you come away from that. And Cory's a very complicated, Machiavellian character. But I personally came away from that team Cory, and I thought, like, Billy Crudup, he could have. He didn't go. He didn't go to 11 in that scene. Like, what made it terrifying. It's the same way, you know, I can talk about this again. Cause I'm an actress now, Tim. The way Meryl Streep made Miranda Priestly terrifying. She would go low. The angrier she was, she would get into a whisper. And that's what Billy Crudup did right there. And it's actually very, very, very powerful, I think.

[Tim McKay]

Yeah, I think that's actually 100% correct. And I don't know if I'm. I just think about my parents. Like, my mom was always the yeller, and I was, like, never afraid of her. But then my dad was the calm, cool, like, when he was mad. It was just like, how Cory came across. And, like, that was always a hundred times more terrifying. And I always would listen to what my dad said as opposed to my mom. But, no, I agree with that 100%. And I. But I do think it's funny that the show is trying to turn Corey into the villain. And this goes back to what you said about Ryan Reynolds. And they literally talked about how Corey burned down his car, his dad's car, how he tried to arson his father's car. And they're like. And then they say, oh, my God, well, you're not really a psycho, are you? Like, they make that a point of, like, you're a villain because you did that. And I just think it's hilarious that, like, Ryan Reynolds is just like, I did that. And we're all like, yeah, well, that's a whole point on this show that makes his villain era Kind of become a thing.

[Maureen Callahan]

So you know that. I'm glad you brought that up. And we'll. After we address this, we'll move on. But. So that scene. Corey's on a date with Bradley on, like, the roof of 30 Rock, and he's saying to her, oh, like, you don't know everything about me, like you're going to learn. And she's like, well, what possibly. And he goes, well, you know, when I was like 16, I set fire to my father's car. I was just looking for some attention. And she laughs and they laugh as if it's this, like, quirky piece of biographical data rather than a confession that would send any sane woman jumping off the roof rather than spending another minute with the guy or at least ask.

[Tim McKay]

More questions like, why? What were you doing?

[Maureen Callahan]

And, like, was accelerant involved? Like, how'd you do?

[Tim McKay]

Were there animals in the car? Small animals. That's next.

[Maureen Callahan]

Yeah, that's next. If not before. Agreed. Okay, now, moving on. Sabrina Carpenter is hosting Saturday Night Live this weekend and she has done a trip. First of all, this is the funniest teaser trailer I have seen in a very long time. And secondly, it is taking like. It's very nervy. It's got. It's got a target and it's got an arrow, and the arrow has hit the center of the target. And that target is none other than our favorite sprightly 900 year old heroine. Let's take a look.

[Sabrina Carpenter (clip)]

New York is one Big Apple and I'm taking my bite at Saturday Night Live.

[Maureen Callahan]

Sabrina, what are you up to in these heels?

[Sabrina Carpenter (clip)]

Probably like five, four.

[Dr. Sarah Rahal]

Hey, Sabrina.

[Maureen Callahan]

Excited for the weekend?

[Sabrina Carpenter (clip)]

Sorry, hon, I prefer a strong end.

[Maureen Callahan]

Oh, thank God, it's Mr. Big. Oh, hey, it's actually Marcelo, but I'll take it. Okay.

[Tim McKay]

Hey, Sabrina, I had a question about the serpent patch guys.

[Sabrina Carpenter (clip)]

Sure, anything for a fan.

[Tim McKay]

No, I'm a writer.

[Maureen Callahan]

Signs an autograph.

[Sabrina Carpenter (clip)]

The woman wondered what she'd gotten herself into. Having won over the cast and crew, the only thing left to do was.

[Maureen Callahan]

What is she writing? No idea. The computer's not even on.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

Amazing.

[Maureen Callahan]

Now, Tim, you know, celebrity on celebrity violence is a very rare thing. What do you make of this?

[Tim McKay]

I think that was probably the funniest thing I've seen on for SNL in, like, I don't even know how long. I. I'm someone who doesn't personally find Saturday Night Live very funny. Ever.

[Maureen Callahan]

Agreed.

[Tim McKay]

Ever. I thought Mad TV back in the day was very funny, but Saturday Night Live, I just have never Found. But I feel like just seeing that cute face, she looked adorable. I love Sabrina Carpenter.

[Maureen Callahan]

I think I do too. I think she's adorable.

[Tim McKay]

I thought that was like, actually really great. And I do think that was like a little dig and just like that. And I hope that they actually do that for the show. I hope that there's a skit about it.

[Maureen Callahan]

Did you check? She got those little, those little ticks that we all. That Sarah Jessica clearly thinks are adorable. And we all hate the, like.

[Whitney Cummings]

I'm adorable.

[Tim McKay]

I know they're skipping around in the high heels. Always just like running across the street, not a care in the world. Just so cute.

[Maureen Callahan]

Just carrying a martini around all day long. Oh, okay. This is amazing. Okay. So then Cynthia Nixon, also late of. And just like that, went on Instagram where she loves to post. You know, she's a big proponent and I'm just talking like in terms of her contradictions. She's a big proponent of communism, socialism, very anti capitalist. And she's always posting from like her second house in Montauk, which is one of the most expensive areas you could live in. And she's posted this thing the other day, her cat at the table. And she thinks it's really cute. You know, first of all, the whole tableau is just. But her cat, Tim. And I say this because I think it's animal abuse. Just my opinion. Her cat is morbidly obese. It's so lovely. I'm so happy that you learned to.

[Sabrina Carpenter (clip)]

Like salad because salad is really good for you. I'm so happy that you're gonna sit and have some salad and hot tea.

[Maureen Callahan]

It's great. Which has a very. This feels very pre French Revolution, very let them eat cake. She's talking about how her cat sits at the dinner table and is never allowed to take food off the dinner table, but somehow always gets fed, which we know because the cat needs a medical intervention. You know, I don't know if there's a cat Ozempic yet, but, you know, cat needs a GLP1.

[Tim McKay]

That is so funny. I think a lot of cats get that, especially house cats. But like, I just love cats to death. I just took my cat to the vet yesterday, so that's all that I can think about right now. I know she was perfectly healthy, not overweight at all.

[Maureen Callahan]

But I feel the same way when I bring my dog to the vet. I'm very proud that my dog, you.

[Tim McKay]

Know, I was very proud.

[Maureen Callahan]

My dog's like a house cat. He doesn't want to go out. He's just. He's a lounge lizard.

[Tim McKay]

Yeah.

[Maureen Callahan]

Now, lastly, we must get to this because this has been going viral and I'm dying. And we're going to explore more of her media tour to salvage a movie that is unsalvageable. Apparently, Jennifer Lopez's Kiss of the Spider Woman, as discussed with Kinsey, has grossed less than $1 million at the box office. That is a resounding. That's worse than Hilaria Baldwin getting kicked off of Dancing with the Stars. That, I think, is the worst rejection the American people could give you. But this. This video was making the rounds. Now, this is Jennifer Lopez looks like she's singing to a crowd in her own home. A captive audience. A microphone is set up. I think this is her house because she's got, like, a vintage movie poster on the wall and it feels very JLO in the Hamptons. She is singing without auto tune or the help of one Sean Diddy Combs, who's got other issues to attend to. Let's take a look. And then the flourish. She, like, her arm goes up like this. She's like, I'm Maria Callas. And she, like, saunters off this way, like, tim, Tim, tell me. Tell me everything.

[Tim McKay]

I've done it. I've done it. No. Ooh, yeah. No. I think that movie is doing terrible. And it's sad because I know, like, so much went into the making of it all. The makeup looks, the hair looks. I know Scott Barnes. He's a makeup artist. He's been her makeup artist forever. And he was posting about how excited he was for it. And there was just something about it. I knew from the very beginning. I was like, this movie looks like crap. Like, it just looks like I have no interest. And then they try to push, like, oh, but it's about, like, a gay and trans storyline. And I'm like, okay, that's not going to make me want to go. I just don't, like, just because it has that selling point. And so I just think the movie is not doing well because as someone recently said, no one under 30 really cares about Jennifer Lopez.

[Maureen Callahan]

So true.

[Tim McKay]

So she's, like, not really a selling point anymore. And it's just kind of like, I think she needs to kind of go into hiding for a while, take a break. And she still has fans that love her old music and stuff. So just hold on to those fans because you're just kind of like making a really embarrassing statement for yourself. She just keeps trying, and it's failure. Flop after flop after flop. But Kiss of the Flop Woman.

[Maureen Callahan]

I know. It's like these people don't see themselves or reflections of each other in the culture. It's very Meghan Markle. It's like we don't take a breath after a failure to retreat and reassess. No, no, no. We push ourselves back on a public that is really, really disgusted at this point and really wants none of it.

[Tim McKay]

She damned herself when she made that behind the scenes video of her movie that she made when she was an afflecklec. Yeah. And it shows her, like trying to get as many celebrities as she can onto it and how they were saying no, how they didn't want to do it. And then she's asking, like, what do you mean as a wedding? Like, what wedding is it? Whose wedding? Like, and just like, what do you mean, a wedding? Yeah, exactly.

[Maureen Callahan]

That's not. It doesn't involve me. What are you doing with your life? Yeah.

[Tim McKay]

And then just for her to put all that into it, it was a huge flop. And then he divorces her immediately afterwards and it's just kind of like, oh, maybe. Yeah, maybe you're not someone to bet on anymore. I just feel like I miss her old rom coms too. Even like the movie enough, I liked her enough.

[Maureen Callahan]

I will say I didn't love enough. It felt very. It felt like sleeping with the enemy light.

[Tim McKay]

Well, I was in my, like, teens when I, when I watched it, so I. Maybe it was just because at the time I was.

[Maureen Callahan]

So you're giving yourself a pass.

[Tim McKay]

I'm giving. Now suddenly I am giving myself a pass.

[Maureen Callahan]

Okay, fair enough. You deserve it, Tim, because you're a lovely person.

[Tim McKay]

Thank you. Thank you. I just remember her little wig in that movie. And, and she. Oh, yeah, the wig, the wig, that little wig. And we're like, okay, girl with the wig.

[Maureen Callahan]

You know, again, I've said it before and I'll say it again. Jennifer Lopez, she could have had a great career as an actress. She knocked it out of the park without a sight. She was incredible in that film. And I wish she had stuck with that instead of going down this road of garbage. Pop music.

[Tim McKay]

And Made in Manhattan. That was like. I remember watching that with my mom. I can still see it, like with my mom in the living room watching Made in Manhattan. And we just loved it. Like, plus, that was like the rom com era. That was a whole like field era which we don't really have anymore. We don't really have a feel good genre anymore. Everything has to be like morbid and reflect on the darkness of humanity now. But I miss the happy rom coms that her and Jennifer Aniston were part of.

[Maureen Callahan]

I think that the good rom coms will come back. I was never really a fan of the Jennifer Aniston Jennifer Lopez era myself. I wound up watching Made in Manhattan doped up after a root canal. It was the only amount of sensory input I could take. But I could talk to you all day about the goal, what I think are the golden age of rom coms and we'll do it on another segment for sure because you and I always have so much to talk about. So thank you, Tim. Thank you for coming on and being a good sport even as I took a battering ram to your beloved Jennifer Aniston.

[Tim McKay]

I'll talk to you about anything anytime. So thanks for having me on.

[Maureen Callahan]

Okay, we'll see you soon.

[Tim McKay]

See you soon.

[Maureen Callahan]

All right, next up we have your feedback. Some new developments in happening at nerve central and then Alec Baldwin's life becomes a literal car crash. We will be back in a minute. Did you know that by the time the average person hits age 60 they have lost and regained several hundred pounds? Doctors call it weight cycling or yo yo dieting and half of Americans do it. If you do it enough, you're at risk of diabetes, liver damage, heart attack and stroke. Weight cycling is when you lose 10 or so pounds but then you put the pounds back on plus a couple of more which puts tremendous strain on your organs and can lead to serious health issues. The bottom line is that most people need help to stop weight cycling and here is a great way to do it. Non prescription Lean was created by doctors. Lean is an oral supplement, not a GLP injectable and the science is impressive. Its studied ingredients also target weight loss in three powerful ways. Lean helps maintain healthy blood sugar. It helps control appetite and cravings and it helps to burn fat by converting it to energy. And burning fat helps to keep the weight off. If you want to lose meaningful weight at a healthy pace and keep it off, add lean to your diet and exercise lifestyle. Get 20% off when you enter nerve code [e-mail] that's code nerveaken.com I'm Dr.

[Dr. Sarah Rahal]

Sarah Rahal, the founder and CEO of Armra. I developed Armor Colostrum because I know your body was designed to thrive. It's your natural state, your birthright, and you can reclaim it. Colostrum is the first nutrition we receive in life with every essential nutrient our bodies need. It's nature's original blueprint for health. After A devastating health crisis almost took my life. I made it my mission to harness this power. Using proprietary technology, AMRA captures over 400 bioactive nutrients in every scoop, delivering over 1000 benefits that transform your health at its foundation. Whether for gut health, metabolism, skin, hair, immunity, mood, energy, fitness or recovery, I invite you to join this collective revival of health and discover radical transformation for yourself. Visit armour.com that's a R M R A dot com and enter code culture30 for 30% off your first subscription. Order the same. It has not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat care or prevent any disease.

[Maureen Callahan]

We are back. Now. First things first to your emails and then we will get to our other announcements. This is after our in the wake of our Ryan Reynolds piece. Hi Maureen. As one of your certified troublemakers, Lovett, and a proud Canadian, I'd like to officially volunteer for the honor of throwing Ryan Reynolds into the wood chipper. I'm sorry, troublemaker, you will have to get in line. It is a very long one. Consider it a patriotic act on behalf of all Canadians who've just had had enough of him. Of course we'll do it with maple syrup, politeness and a signed waiver. Following up on your show today, this is another one who did the research. I found confirmation online that Ryan's father, James Chester Reynolds, retired from the RCMP in the early 2000s. So allegedly he was still on the force in 1987, which means he was actively serving when Ryan Reynolds set his elementary school on fire. Hi Maureen. Michael, an elder millennial from Chicago here. Can there be such a thing as an elder millennial? I wouldn't, I wouldn't push push your aging process too much, Michael. I cannot adequately describe the endorphin rush I get each episode from the let's go at the top of every show. A merch idea for a nerve mug, perhaps? It's going on the list. Michael says that this past year I've been going through a rough divorce from my husband of 15 years. It has been excruciating. Michael, our thoughts are with you. However, I cannot emphasize this is so wonderful. I cannot emphasize the empowerment this program has had on me since discovering it a few months back. After years of rose colored glasses looking at bullshit, it is so refreshing to have a community of troublemakers led by a voice of truth. Thank you. Tough times will subside, as proved by this program getting me through my morning workout, commute to work and after work martini when very few things had kept me inspired Keep up the good work. Feel free to share. Michael, that is just lovely. This is a little bit of a lengthy one, but you guys are gonna love it. This is one of the smarter. I mean, they're smart. But this one really dug in a bit. This is from Laura. Troublemaker Laura. This after. After our most recent segments on Ryan Reynolds and Meghan Markle, it got me thinking that somewhere along the way, celebrity stopped being a byproduct of achievement and became a credential in itself. We now live in a culture where fame is the fast pass to achieve authority. How the hell did Meghan Markle actually get to speak at the Fortune Most Powerful Women's Summit? Money, visibility. She knows nothing of company growth and the pivots that are necessary as seen by flop after flop. She's a person who married a British prince who is arrested in his development around the age of 12. In my opinion, okay, this is someone who grew up with a psychiatrist father and a child psychologist stepmother, per her report. Furthermore, it is not that these figures are inherently unworthy. It's that the criteria for credibility has changed. We once celebrated creators, thinkers and innovators for their work. Now we seem to celebrate whoever can hold our gaze the longest. What do you think over there at the Nerve, Laura? This is why the Nerve exists. This is exactly why we're here. The results? Emotional performance gets mistaken for emotional intelligence. Not with the troublemakers, though. We're all onto it. A well lit monologue passes as leadership. A brand partnership looks like wisdom. Hey, talk to Jennifer Aniston. She seems to think so. As a fractional chief relationship officer for business leaders, this hits my nerve. Couldn't agree with you more, Maureen. Thank you for exposing the ongoing news in the Priscilla Presley lawsuit. I'm originally from Memphis, Tennessee. She loved our interview with Donna Presley. You know what really strikes me? This is Troublemaker Emily. The dichotomy between Priscilla and Lisa Marie as mothers. Last year, I read Lisa Marie's posthumous memoir where she repeatedly states that her greatest gift in life was being a mother. That is true. I read that book. In Priscilla's new book, she says hers is Keeping Graceland. But most notably, Emily points out, and I love this, there are two different accounts regarding Priscilla wanting to abort Lisa Marie. This is so dark. In Lisa Marie's book, she claims that her mother wanted to fall off a horse to miscarry her, that she wanted an abortion for fear of becoming fat and ugly, but opted not to because Elvis reassured her he'd love her to start their family in Priscilla's book. She claims that Elvis suggested the abortion and that she considered it but ultimately refused. Either way, says Emily, how horrible for Lisa Marie to hear from the very beginning that her mother did not want her. Hi Maureen. An idea for the Nerve at night looks like this. You, me, some fabulous troublemakers and maybe Teddy Van Halen all sitting around with cocktails in hand. Bone for Teddy. And everybody in PJs sharing gossip and stories. Girl talk with everyone. Armando. Armando. The heterosexual males of all ages find you funny and fascinating. Oh my God, I love it. Okay. Hello Maureen from the great state of Florida. I have learned so much from your show, especially about the Kennedys. I now frequently update my wife on celebrity news instead of vice versa. I love that. This is troublemaker Nick. I never cared for Pete Davidson and now I know why. He always came off as way too impressed with himself. The quote about his dad's jacket making him sad, so he took it down from display. Showed how self centered he really is. His dad who died in 9 11. Pete has his firefighters uniform framed, but sometimes takes it down. But he still went over to Chop Chop Square cause he got a big fat paycheck. Gee, I wonder why it makes you sad, Pete. Maybe it's because a bunch of Saudis reduced your precious father who you allegedly loved so much to ash. But please enjoy that oil money. Keep that wood chipper lubed and fueled up, says Nick. There are always worthy celebrities and star fuckers innocently loitering around. It's open, Ma. I love it. Dear Maureen, from yet another 51 year old straight guy, blue collar airline pilot. Would that be blue collar? I think that's a pretty high level job, friend. But okay, hasn't missed a single episode. I thought you'd like to hear this. Last Saturday on a surf trip with my 15 year old son, I asked him what should we watch when we get back to the cabin? His answer? The Mini Cheers Paulino. We love it. We love it. Keep them coming now. You know where to find me. You can email me Maureen Callahan. Sorry, no. Email me at maurenevilmaycaremedia.com DM me at Maureen Callahanrider or at the Nerve show. And our big announcement. Little drum roll. Little drum roll. As promised, the Nerves Substack is launching today. This afternoon. Check around 3pm Eastern. Head over to thenerv.com and make sure you subscribe. We've got a ton of goodies in there for you. You're gonna love it. Remember also you can grab some merch [e-mail] and the nerve at night returns next Wednesday, 5pm Eastern. So we've got a lot going on over here for you troublemakers at Nerve Central. We will see you back here in a minute. Up to 80% of all women deal with imbalances, PMS, mood swings, brain fog, thinning hair, you name it. And it's tough to feel like yourself when your body is completely out of whack. Glow by Beam is a solution. This is a women's super powder designed to tackle hormonal imbalances with a holistic approach that supports thyroid function and collagen production. It also boosts energy, mood, metabolism, and can even strengthen hair and nails. Just mix one packet of Glow with your water daily. It's that simple. Plus, more than 40,000 women are already using Glo and over 30 and it has over 3,000 five star reviews. For a limited time, Beam is offering Nerve listeners up to 35% off Glow. Just visit shopbeam.com nerve and use code nerve at checkout. That's shop b e a m.com nerve and don't forget to use code nerve for your exclusive discount.

[Dr. Sarah Rahal]

I'm Dr. Sarah Rahal, the founder and CEO of Armra. I developed armor Colostrum because I know your body was designed to thrive. It's your natural state, your birthright, and you can reclaim it. Colostrum is the first nutrition we receive in life with every essential nutrient our bodies need. It's nature's original blueprint for health. After a devastating health crisis almost took my life, I made it my mission to harness this power. Using proprietary technology, armra captures over 400 bioactive nutrients in every scoop, delivering over 1000 benefits that transform your health at its foundation. Whether for gut health, metabolism, skin, hair, immunity, mood, energy, fitness or recovery, I invite you to join this collective revival of health and discover radical transformation for yourself. Visit armr.com that's a R M r-a.com and enter code health30 for 30% off your first subscription order. This statement has not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease.

[Sabrina Carpenter (clip)]

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[Maureen Callahan]

We are back and. Oh, my God, have I been waiting to do this one since the news broke the other day that Alec Baldwin crashed his Range Rover, which he made a point to say it was his wife's. Why? I don't know. Wrapped it around a tree, basically. Okay, I have a lot to say about this. And this also coincides. It was, like, days after his wife got kicked off of Dancing with the Stars, and she's clearly back in the house and things are not going well. I would surmise. I would surmise. Now I have several things to say about this. So he crashes his. There was a nor' easter here, okay, on the northeast. That's why they're called nor'. Easters. Sorry. And he's out driving around like an asshole. If you don't have to be on the road when it's slick and windy, especially out in the Hamptons, which, like, there's no. There are very few buffers out there. It is. It is. It is a lot of farmland. There are not like. There are no buffers. It is very raw out there in the fall and the winter. And it's beautiful, but it's raw. But no. Alec Baldwin had to get in his Range Rover and go drive somewhere around noon, okay? So he crashes this. This Range Rover and he says. He goes on Instagram and he talks about why this isn't his fault. And, you know, is this any surprise? Because this is a guy who killed Helena Hutchins by shooting her with a loaded gun that never should have been loaded on the set of Rust and said it wasn't his fault. She told him where to point the gun at her, and it wasn't his job to know that the gun was loaded or not. It was just his effing production. Oh, my God. It wasn't like they had a million complaints from the underpaid crew that there were firearms being played with left and right, and there was no sense of protocol or safety in place. And this was a. This was an accident waiting to happen. So Alec, you know, got off scot free for that. And I'll circle back to this in a minute. Let's watch Alec. He went to Instagram talking to us as though we've all been on the edge of our sofas with our heads in our hands, wringing our hands, wanting to know, is Alec Baldwin. All right, let's take a look.

[Alec Baldwin]

I just want to post a quick message. I got all this inquiries about my car thing this morning. I was in a car accident this morning. I'm fine. My brother Stephen was out visiting, thank.

[Maureen Callahan]

God.

[Alec Baldwin]

On Rhode island and we spent the weekend out there for the film festival. I do want to take an opportunity to congratulate everybody on the staff of the film festival. David Nugent.

[Maureen Callahan]

First things first.

[Alec Baldwin]

And everyone. Casey, I can't think of our board, our sponsors, Stuart Suna, my co chair on the board, Randy Mastro, everyone.

[Maureen Callahan]

Okay, we're just gonna stop it. This sounds like an Oscar speech. You can, you can go watch the whole thing if you want. Alex says it wasn't his fault, okay? He says he, he was just trying to make a turn, you know, and like the garbage truck in front of him effed up. It was the garbage truck driver's fault and that's why he crashed into a tree. Now I'm gonna tell you a few things that I know personally. Number one, you know I live out east like you guys know this, okay? The top speed limit, top is like 40 miles an hour. The average speed limit is like 30 miles an hour. And the cops are out there on Route 27 where he crashed his car constantly with their radar guns because they make a lot of money giving assholes like him tickets. Secondly, the most dangerous thing an impatient driver can do. I'm gonna surmise that Alec is impatient. We know he has rage issues. Is attempt to make to go around a garbage truck by making a right hand turn. How do I know this? Because my father was a truck driver for many years and then he went on to run the safety department of a major garbage trucking company in New York. And he knew all about this stuff, okay? So I know that. Thirdly, when somebody like Alec Baldwin does that and then tries to put the blame on the truck driver, you know what's gonna happen? That truck driver's gonna be out of a freaking job and they're not gonna get hired by another trucking company because they caused a serious accident. At least in Alex telling wasn't his fault. He was just behind the wheel trying to make an improper turn. Cuz he couldn't wait for the garbage truck to get done doing its business because there's probably garbage backed up because there was a nor'. Easter. Okay? Now the other thing I know those trucks always have cameras everywhere, including on the inside. Because when stuff like this happens, the heads of those companies and their lawyers need to get eyes on it to know what is what. So Newsmax got the dash cam footage of said crash and Put it on the Internet. So let's watch it. Alec, I hope you're watching now with video you will see only here on Newsmax. We've just obtained exclusive dashcam video showing the moment actor Alec Baldwin crashed his SUV on the east end of New York's Long Island. The video is from the front facing camera on a commercial truck. You're seeing the truck here making what's believed to be a legal right turn. And then it slows down.

[Newsmax Reporter]

Seconds later, Baldwin's SUV is seen hitting a mailbox and a tree off to the right side of the truck. The actor, an outspoken Trump hater, claimed on social media that he was driving his wife's Range Rover with his brother Stephen Baldwin in the passenger seat. He said he was trying to avoid hitting this truck, so he veered off the road into the tree. Does not appear, though, that anyone was injured in the crash, but obviously not.

[Maureen Callahan]

That is not possible. Okay, we can stop right there. First of all, I love how they dug in like a vowed Trump hater. Like the minute the car hits the tree, you know, as if it's sort of like a thing from the gods. Very funny. And I'm laughing only because nobody was hurt. But secondly, that footage contradicts exactly what Alex said. Alec was trying to get around the truck because he didn't want to stay behind it. He needed to get somewhere. He needed to get to his film festival where he's a big shot. You know, look what happened. Now, this to me, is the outgrowth of what happens in celebrity justice. And we're seeing some of it with Diddy now. We'll see where he gets sent. But Alec Baldwin, his trial ended and he cannot be charged again in the shooting death of Helena Hutchins because the prosecution made legal errors that disqualified the case from moving forward. Okay, but this is. I'm telling you, this is what happens when these. When these celebrities face zero consequences, even for ending a life in a violent and brutal manner and then refusing to take responsibility for it, to express remorse for it, and they get off scot free. Alec Baldwin remains a public menace. And the other thing I know for sure is that Alec's got the police department in East Hampton in his pocket. Before he wound up losing a lot of his money in these court cases, he was donating millions of dollars. His hands are in everything. Out in East Hampton, there's a wing of the public library named after him. Guild Hall. He's got money in. You want to tell me he's not donating to the police and fire Departments out there, they didn't even write this guy a ticket. And East Hampton loves to issue parking tickets, speeding tickets, all manner of tickets. And he walked off. And if this guy winds up killing somebody someday, a lot of people are going to have blood on their hands. What am I saying? He already killed someone if he winds up killing somebody else. Now onto more Baldwin hijinks. Hilaria, who I call the Rachel doll, is all of the Hamptons. I take credit for that one. I have to. I did it in the New York Post cover story. I wrote when we first learned for real that she was not a Spanish lady from Spain, as she had claimed. How you say cucumber. But she was Hillary Thomas Hayward from Boston, the descendant of Mayflower bluebuds. Okay, so she was on Dancing with the Stars. We all know it was a big joke. Everybody knew it was a joke except Hilaria. And she got eliminated. Now, she didn't get it because she was like, I'm a good dancer. And Hilaria, that's not the point. The point is, does America like you? And America fucking hates you. Okay? And so she gets her exit interview when she's kicked off. Note the level of body makeup. Okay, we are going heavy on the bronzer. We are committing to the Spanish fantasy. And watch her both give her farewell speech and grab the microphone out of the hand of the interviewer faster than Meghan Markle can push Harry to the ground in her haste to get to a camera or a microphone. Here we go.

[Sabrina Carpenter (clip)]

I close the door and dance a long time ago.

[Maureen Callahan]

There are no tears coming out of her mouth. Her eyes rather.

[Sabrina Carpenter (clip)]

Maybe I'll close the door again.

[Maureen Callahan]

Please do. Please close the door on all of it.

[Tim McKay]

Listen, we're not going to close the door because we're going tomorrow. We're gonna do some tick tocks.

[Maureen Callahan]

Oh, we're going back to tick tock. Thank God. Thank God. Okay.

[Sabrina Carpenter (clip)]

I mean, this has been an incredible experience.

[Dr. Sarah Rahal]

I'm so grateful to all of you.

[Maureen Callahan]

I do think in a very Kafka esque way. Alec is suffering his punishment because he can never leave her. He can't afford to. They have 85 children. He can't afford that kind of child support and alimony. So his punishment is that he's stuck with her until he dies. I'm going to predict of a stress induced heart attack. Okay, now moving on, our last offender of the day. And then we will tease our mini one, Whitney Cummings, who played Chop Chop Square and then took to her podcast to tell us all why we're in the wrong for finding this offensive, if not morally and ethically bankrupt. Here we go, you guys.

[Whitney Cummings]

I just. I guess I'm this weirdo. I don't operate under, you know, the idea that every government and their people are the same. But I guess that's like you think that the people of Saudi Arabia.

[Maureen Callahan]

Don't tell me what I think. Government, you don't know.

[Whitney Cummings]

All share you. Okay, so you also believe that the Chinese government and the Chinese people are.

[Maureen Callahan]

Exactly. Again, don't tell me what is racism.

[Whitney Cummings]

I just. I didn't. I think it took me a second. Because when people are going like, you're doing something unethical, I'm like, oh, these must be ethical people. Let me listen. And then you're like, oh, no, you're just racist.

[Maureen Callahan]

I wonder if she's talking to some of us over here at the Nerve.

[Jennifer Aniston (clip)]

You.

[Maureen Callahan]

You and me, troublemakers. We're racists. We're not only racists, which, by the way, those of you who keep throwing this word around, you're diluting it of meaning. Because if everything and everyone is racist, then nothing and no one is racist. Secondly, we're dumb because we don't understand that. What we are doing in condemning those who went over to Chop Square is. We don't understand that the oppressed citizenry of a brutal, murderous, Islamic fundamentalist government that chops people to bits for shoplifting or speaking to men to whom they are not married. The problems with us, you see, so we. We are. We're misguided. And Whitney's in the right. And by the way, she does not present to me as somebody who really is coming at this with the courage of her convictions because she's doing a lot and, like, her voice is raised and she seems exercised by this. And I'm going to guess that when we talk to Mark Bowden next time, we'll revisit a little bit of this so that he can talk to us. Because I think if you have the courage of your convictions in something like this, a very serious matter, you would just sit and talk in a very reasoned and measured way. But. Okay. Whitney feels that she has not gotten her point across. And so she's going to explain to us why in a comic, she does not name, and I don't know why, just name him Whitney, if you really feel this strongly about it, felt that, well, basically, what compelled him, what animated him to call her a big fan, hypocrite single mother, by the way, who got pregnant by a guy she said she barely knows. You know who would love that Saudi regime? They would love Whitney Cummings over there. You know, as a resident, you'd be dead by now, lady. You'd be dead. Okay, go.

[Whitney Cummings]

A comic tried to imply that it was hypocritical that I went because I, you know, I did a special about sexual harassment and stuff like that. I was like, kind of during the Me Too movement. And it's. You know, it might be a compelling argument if it wasn't someone who was just bummed that they weren't invited, you know, because he also believes he deserves 72 virgins. Maybe it's that. Maybe it's that.

[Maureen Callahan]

So is it David Cross who was very vocal and said that everyone who was going over there was freaking morally bankrupt? But he's married. He's married to the actress. I forget her name, but he's Amber Tamlin. They have a child. So she's basically also calling him an incel. And, you know, I always find the retro. The retort, the. The schoolyard retort. You're just jealous. Trust me, Whitney, it's not that. Okay? It's not. Now Whitney is going to talk about why it's completely valid for a woman to go over to Chop Chop Square to a country where women have zero rights. Oh, excuse me. They. They got the right to drive about six years ago. So, I mean, it's a fucking American Revolution over there. Here she is on why it's okay for women to perform at Chop Chop Square. Let's go.

[Tim McKay]

How could you, a woman on stage, agree to perform where they don't let women on stage?

[Newsmax Reporter]

It's.

[Tim McKay]

I'm gonna math right on that.

[Whitney Cummings]

This is statement, but regression of the highest order.

[Tim McKay]

They don't let women on stage.

[Whitney Cummings]

No.

[Sabrina Carpenter (clip)]

How.

[Tim McKay]

How could you go.

[Whitney Cummings]

How could you. How could you do this? And, you know, how could you.

[Tim McKay]

How could you. And how could you.

[Whitney Cummings]

And also.

[Maureen Callahan]

She. She thinks this is who's on first.

[Whitney Cummings]

Look, it's. It's. I'm trying to help you sound less racist.

[Maureen Callahan]

Okay? So we're back to racism again. And it's. We've moved off misogyny and sexism. You know, they love to. People like Whitney love to talk about things like institutionalized sexism and misogyny and that. That little bit she was trying to do where she thought she was really cute. Like, how could you go. And how could you go perform? Like, there's a literalism they're working with. They're like, well, if they hate women so much, how could they let you, a woman on stage? It's easy, Whitney. It's called propaganda. They're trying to make their kingdom of terror seem more acceptable to the west by using useful idiots like yourself. Because if you think for a second that a woman your age in Saudi Arabia or any age, quite frankly, enjoys the rights and freedoms that you do as a woman here in America, you're a fuckwit. You're a fuckwit and you just took blood. Money. Just say it. Just say it. Say, I love money. I can't get enough money and I'm willing to throw morals and values out the window and be a big fucking hypocrite so I can get a fuck ton of money. Just say it. But you can't because you're actually, you don't have the courage of your convictions. If you had them, you just admit it. That's it. That's it. That's our catharsis. That's our catharsis. And that does it for our Nerve Friday edition. Okay? Now we are going to be back here tomorrow reporting for duty on the Mini Nerve. And it's going to be great because we're doing one of the things you guys have been dying for. You've been asking for it. We've been working out how to get the best way to do it. We are going to be, we are going to be taking celebrities who say that they look so eternally youthful and glowing and healthy because they get enough sleep and water and good nutrition, unlike the rest of us knuckle draggers. And we're going to talk to a plastic surgeon who's going to tell us what they did and when they did it and what it costs and the pain involved. And we're just going to blow that open too, okay? It'll be really fun. It'll be really, really fun. So remember, we've Got the Nerve Substack launching in a few hours, 3pm Eastern, Friday. Today. Okay, Be sure to subscribe. You're going to get all kinds of like juicy behind the scenes nerve stuff. It's all in there in that launch email. You'll see it and we will see you back here. We'll see you back here Saturday, then Tuesday for a full episode of the Nerve where you will never guess what we're about to say next.