← The Nerve with Maureen Callahan
The Nerve with Maureen Callahan
Meghan and Harry's Distasteful Party Attendance, Oprah's Plus One, and A-Rod's Reputation Reckoning
01:15:57
Maureen Callahan goes all in on the week’s most unhinged celebrity moments. She is joined by Kinsey Schofield, host of 'Kinsey Schofield Unfiltered,' to break down Meghan Markle and Prince Harry’s tone-deaf appearance at Kris Jenner’s 70th birthday bash on Remembrance Day and the latest signs that Harry wants out. Then they turn to Oprah and Gayle’s curious relationship and question the whereabouts of Oprah’s former plus one, Stedman Graham. Maureen and Kinsey roll their eyes in unison when discussing Michelle Obama's grievance about enduring a constant glam squad while living in the White House. Bill from Brooklyn joins Maureen later in the show to talk about A-Rod's new HBO documentary and his attempt to resuscitate his reputation. They also take shots at Tom Brady's egregious decision to clone his dog and the suspicious details surrounding Mark Sanchez's stabbing incident that left him wounded and jobless. Lean: Visit https://TakeLean.com & use code Nerve for 20% off Oxfor...
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- [00:00]
A
I've never felt like this before. It's like you just get me. I feel like my true self with you. Does that sound crazy? And it doesn't hurt that you're gorgeous. Okay, that's it. I'm taking you home with me. I mean, you can't find shoes this good just anywhere. Find a shoe for every you from brands you love like Birkenstock, Nike, Adidas and more at your dsw store or dsw.com.
- [00:33]
B
Hello and welcome to your Tuesday edition of the Nerve. I am your host Maureen Callahan and we have got it for you. Good. Today we are kicking off with none other than royal expert Kinsey Schofield, host of the Must subscribe Kinsey Schofield Unfiltered. We have breaking Harry and Meghan developments that we are going to get into as well as a lot of talk about just what went on at the Kris Jenner 70th, excuse me, birthday party over the weekend. Goper and Gail showed up yet again. Together again. They're never apart. We're getting into it. And then we've got some more Michelle Obama. I think her team was watching the Nerve. I think so. We have theories. We'll get into it. We've got your feedback. I've got a brand new recommendation for you guys. And then we're gonna get into some great stuff, especially for you manly men, super straight guys who work really hard jobs or in the Marines. Bill from Brooklyn is here and we're gonna be talking about the first episode of the new three part HBO documentary on a Rod which has all kinds of celebrity Hollywood scandal attached to it, plus reputation, rehab and a rivalry for the ages. One unlike any I think we've ever seen play out on the public stage at this level. We're going to be talking about Tom Brady cloning his dog for $50,000. We're going to be talking about Mark Sanchez, the ex NFL player who just lost his job as a football Fox broadcaster for some back alley brawl that isn't adding up. In my opinion, we are locked and loaded. Troublemakers. Are you ready? Are you ready? We are ready. So let's go. By the time the average person hits age 60, they have lost and regained several hundred pounds. You may know it as yo yo dieting. Doctors call it weight cycling. Half of Americans do it and if you do it enough, you're at risk of diabetes, liver damage, heart attack and stroke. This is when you lose 10 or so pounds but then you put it back on. Plus a little more back and forth, up and down it all puts tremendous strain on your organs and it leads to serious health issues. The bottom line is that most people need help to stop weight cycling. Here is a great option. This is non prescription. Lean was created by doctors. Lean is an oral supplement, not a GLP injectable and the science is impressive. The studied ingredients target weight loss in three powerful ways. Lean helps maintain healthy blood sugar. It helps control appetite and cravings. And it helps burn fat by converting it to energy. And burning fat helps keep the weight off. If you want to lose meaningful weight at a healthy pace and keep it off, add lean to your diet and exercise lifestyle. Get 20% off when you enter nerve@takelean.com that's code nerve@takelean.com joining us now to discuss Breaking Harry and Meghan Developments is Kinsey Schofield again. If you haven't subscribed, go over to Kinsey Schofield unfiltered subscribe. You are not going to find an American correspondent. More dialed in to what's going on with the royals. She's over at like the palace every other week. Like, seriously, she knows what's up. So here we go. Kinsey, welcome.
- [04:34]
A
I would also clone my dog for $50,000. For the record, I hope you go easy on him.
- [04:40]
B
Oh, trust me, I was having this discussion. I've had it with several people, like, would you do it? Would you not do it? And I kind of think I probably would as well. I think Teddy might find himself his next vet appointment with like a blood vial put in storage. Okay. Not to be, you know, he's only, he's a young man. Okay, first up, first up, we have to discuss the image that went round the world. Okay. Harry leading Meghan into Kris Jenner's 70th 007 themed birthday party in Beverly Hills. Harry with a face like thunder wearing his Remembrance Day poppy, which, I'm sorry, not appropriate for the event. He's got her by the hand. He's looking down. He's not even looking at her. She's way behind him and she is beaming. She is beaming like this is the biggest moment of her life. Save her wedding. The Daily Mail headline, a world away from royal duty. Colon. Prince Harry seems, quote, fed up of being paraded and unable to quote, stage Richter grin. You have got to love those headline writers at the Mail as he and Populous Megan Visit Kris Jenner's 70th on the eve of of Remembrance Sunday. Kinsey, what do you make of this?
- [06:05]
A
Well, I there was as somebody that follows the royal family, of course I'm loving the images we're getting leading up to Kris Jenner's birthday of Prince George showing up to an event with Princess Catherine wearing their poppies. Then we get the beautiful Remembrance Sunday shots of the King, Prince William, Catherine, and Queen Camilla all looking graceful and stoic and just disrespectful of, you know, our veterans and patriotic, you know, just the jarring contrast between those images we're seeing out of the UK of the Royal family honoring the dead, honoring the heroes, versus Harry and Megan keeping up with the Kardashians. It is unreal. And you're just so thoroughly disappointed in Prince Harry because you're right, he's wearing that. Well, I mean, he's wearing that poppy because he's trying to remind us that he has this history. But I think that, you know, ultimately, I think that he has been, you know, I think he's. This is who he is now. Whether he likes it or not, he's become a reality TV star. I mean, the last time we really saw anything from him was the Netflix series. Occasionally he does little interviews, but it shows us what the Sussexes have been reduced to. They are unapologetically tacky, and you're seeing where their priorities are here. Also, you might get this more than than some of the the UK audience, but the Kardashians have been selling family secrets to the media for years. You know, Kris Jenner, the last 48 hours, Kris Jenner's birthday, Kylie Jenner's cat, Kim Kardashian's failed bar exam. They have the media on speed dial. This is what they are not trustworthy. How can Harry lash out at his family for doing the exact same thing? But for some reason, the Kardashians cooperation with the media is okay. You know what I mean?
- [08:15]
B
Such a great point, Kinsey. You know what? What Harry calls briefing against me. Right? Palace courtiers for King Charles, Prince William, Catherine briefing against me. Such a great point. Number two, again, how could his family be getting any messaging other than this is the level we're at. And yes, I am consorting with people who have TMZ and backgrid on speed dial. Thirdly, this goes to the lack of good people they have around them. It is not advisable to wear a somber Remembrance Day poppy for those who were slaughtered in World War I and World War II. Preserving the Western world and democracy upon entering. I mean, crossing the threshold of, like, I picture this tableau like, you know, when towards the end of Rosemary's Baby, when Mia Farrow is Making her peace with the notion that her child, her newborn, is going to be raised by the satanic coven in the. I think it's in the Dakota on the Upper west side. And so she, like, peers through the doorway, and there's the bassinet, and. And it's, like, swathed. It's, like, hanging down is like the black crepe, like, the black mesh. And Ruth Gordon is in there with her, like, elderly hands. Like, she's like, I'm gonna make this baby Satan. Like, that's what Harry's doing. You're crossing the threshold. Okay? You're the sacrifice. You are the human sacrifice, you dummy. And this is my theory. And tell me what you think of it. I'm dying to know. Here's what I think. I think Megan went to Kris Jenner and said, would you get me in to a major fashion show in Paris? Kris Jenner said, sure, I could get you into Balenciaga, first row. But the trade off is you've got to come and be photographed at my 70th birthday with Harry.
- [10:12]
A
And that's why he's there and miserable. Well, you know, Tom Bower does say, and I believe him, that Meghan has been desperate for these kinds of invitations for a while. So I. You know, I think that you have a point that Meghan's not the prize at the door. It's Prince Harry. You know, it's getting Prince Harry in the door. So I can. I can see that you and I have been reporting for months that there's some sort of collaboration going on between Kris Jenner and Meghan Markle and Kardashian. I had somebody say to me in the last few days, oh, but Meghan's not like Kim, because she wouldn't make a sex tape. I mean, fellatio. On the pilot episode of the new Beverly Hills 90210. You know, really, Would she not make a. I don't know. Before Prince Harry? I don't know, because she is making all of her dreams come true. Right now. It's Harry that looks absolutely miserable and homesick, and he's writing about being homesick, you know, and. And these. I miss the banter. I miss the humor. What you miss is having a life of your own. What you miss is having friends that understood your upbringing, that didn't judge you and criticize you for your. Your traditions and again, for the way that you were brought up. Because clearly, Meghan Markle is a buzzkill. Otherwise, he would still have relationships with anybody from his old world. He doesn't talk to his family. He has no friends. Meanwhile, Meghan Markle is chasing after, you know, Oprah, Tyler Perry, Mariah and Kris Jenner at this birthday party. And she thinks she's hit the jackpot. But I feel like it's a reflection of how far they've come and how they really have just become these reality TV personalities.
- [11:58]
B
They thought when they sat down with Oprah Winfrey right before COVID hit that they were hard launching the rival court of Montecito that was going to take down the monarchy. And this is where they're at, getting papped by bat grid. Meghan beaming, beaming like she's on her way to her own coronation. This is like the ultimate for her to be invited to a Kris Jenner jam. You know, Harry looks disconsolate. Harry looks like he can't believe how far he's fallen.
- [12:34]
A
Right.
- [12:35]
B
If Diana were alive and she was a true monarchist, she would be apoplectic that these two are not only consorting with the Kardashians. You know, you see these images from the party and it's like oiled up reality stars the likes of, you know, Kyle Richards from Beverly Hills, Real Housewives or Kim, like spilling out of her skin tight dress, fresh off having failed the bar and the worst reviewed streaming show in modern history, zero percent on Rotten Tomatoes. These are the people Harry is running with now. I want to run, by the way, equally pathetic, equally pathetic Harry up in Canada trying to remind everybody that he once did stand for something. Veterans and Invictus games apologizing. I mean, he may as well be down on his own hands and knees to Canada, which his father is the monarch of, the king of for wearing a Dodgers cap at the World Series game in la. And if you're not watching this, I have to implore you watch this segment on YouTube because the micro expressions on the face and the body language, our pal Mark Bowden would go to town for days. Here we go.
- [14:02]
C
Well, firstly, I would like to apologize.
- [14:04]
D
To Canada for wearing it.
- [14:07]
C
Secondly, I was underdressed. There wasn't much choice.
- [14:10]
D
I was invited to the LA Dodgers.
- [14:12]
C
Box or dug out by the owner himself.
- [14:14]
B
Never ever his fault thing to do. But he practically curtsies there.
- [14:20]
C
I'm gonna wear this from now on to make sure I don't make any more of those mistakes.
- [14:24]
D
But the other piece to this was as you could probably relate.
- [14:27]
C
When you have, when you're, when you're missing a lot of hair on top.
- [14:29]
D
And you're sitting under floodlights, you'll take any Hat that's available.
- [14:33]
A
Oh, my gosh.
- [14:34]
B
Okay. He gave like five excuses for why he wore the Dodgers hat. None of which were her response is his responsibility. This is a 40 something year old Prince of the blood. Oh, my God. Was under duress. First of all, how classless are you? You were invited by the owner of the team you were seated front row in front of and you're throwing him.
- [14:58]
A
Under the bus right now. You will be invited again.
- [15:01]
B
You'll never be invited back. Yet another list they've been crossed off of per, like permanently. They are so declassee and tacky, these two. Then, oh, well, I made a mistake and I won't be making that mistake again. And he, he like kind of like almost does like a mini curtsy like a lady, like, oh, okay. Oh, and then somebody's handing me this hat, the Blue Jays hat. And I'm going to put this on now and I'm going to firmly affix it onto my head. And by the way, if you haven't noticed, I'm bald. I mean, I may have made fun of my brother Prince William for going bald before me, but like now I'm bald too. And when you have hot lights on the top of your bald spot, you know what you're going to do? You're going to grab any hat available. This is a man. This is a man. Kinsey.
- [15:44]
A
Listen, all I have to say is I'm so grateful to finally hear an apology from Prince Harry in any way, shape or form because he still hasn't apologized to his family for calling them all racists. So at least we know he's actually capable of saying the words I'm sorry that, I mean, that's impressive. But what a great example of their just disloyalty in general, which we do consist. See with both of their families, they are loyal to no one unless you have an opportunity in front of them right there in that moment. I'm so sorry that I wore the Dodgers hat. The man that gave me the free seats put me in it. But now I'm loyal to you guys. Now I'm going to resort to being loyal to you guys because you're in front of me right now. They're loyal to absolutely no one. And you know, he was trying to have a cute, self deprecating moment there with the bald comment. But what I took away from the visit, which I don't know if you saw, he's talking to CTV in that interview and they asked him about being at the Sunnydale Veterans center and he Says, well, my aunt's been here, my grandmother's been here, my great grandmother's been here. He's trying to remind us that he's royal this. He's trying to force the half in, half out royal look, royal strategy that the Queen said, absolutely not. And I don't care how many elderly veterans you sit and paint poppies next to, we will not forgive you for the heinous way you treated your elderly grandmother and grandfather on their deathbeds. You were horrible to them. So you can spend time at little veteran centers all over the place. But some, you know, veterans themselves, Queen Elizabeth and Prince Philip, felt ultimately betrayed by you in their final days here on this earth. They were fearful of you. They didn't know what you were going to do next. So I don't care how many pictures you take next to old people are elderly who I love. This is not. I'm not disparaging them in any way, shape or form.
- [17:47]
B
I know what you're saying Prince William.
- [17:49]
A
Is using or Prince Harry is using them as props to try to change public perception of him.
- [17:54]
B
And, you know, not for nothing, but it was just reported over the weekend I pulled this out of the New York Post that Andrew, now known as Andrew Mountbatten Windsor. Get ready for it, Harry. It's coming your way. Notable that Meghan doesn't bother anymore going with him on these Invictus trips or trips involving veterans. Oh, she said she didn't wear a poppy to Kris Jenner 70th, unlike her husband, because they weren't. And this is, per the Daily Mail quote, readily available.
- [18:27]
A
And I899 on Amazon, 8.99 on Amazon. I ordered it yesterday. It got to my house today. You're lying. Meghan Markle.
- [18:34]
B
And by the way, you know who, who were guests also at that event? Jeff Bezos and Lauren Sanchez. She could have texted Lauren and said, I need a poppy ASAP. Been sent via drone to wherever she was.
- [18:47]
A
Exactly.
- [18:48]
B
3D printed it. Get the F out. Get out. So the Queen, I kind of think now that there's some sort of. There is definitely a through line as to how Harry got this way because this report says that the Queen, when she was alive, allowed Andrew to have multiple hookers repeatedly at Buckingham Palace. And I think this sort of looking the other way when it comes to the favorite son who's a bit of a. What they would. They used to call him Randy Andy. This was back in the 80s. Today, it's like the new reports have it that, like those two, Andrew and Sarah are going to have to leave the UK altogether and might be headed for prison.
- [19:30]
A
I mean, we'll have to wait and see. I thought that they, that Congress demanding he testify for them probably put the fear of God into him because I don't think that King Charles is protecting him anymore. But then at the same time time today it was announced that Princess Beatrice is the new patron of a hospital which was approved by King Charles and then she was there taking pictures. And now there are people in the UK in an uproar over the fact that especially so quickly after what's happening with Prince Andrew, they're giving Princess Beatrice a platform. So what truly is going on there? Who is. Look who is looking at the optics.
- [20:09]
B
Because he do that, by the way, while William was in Rio.
- [20:13]
A
I mean, William's home now. So no, this has happened in the last like 48 hours. So I mean maybe the decision was made while William was in Rio, but the announcement has come down within the last 24 hours. So I don't think that the optics are great there. If the UK wants this family to disappear, I know time heals all wounds and those girls should not be punished for their father's behavior. But their finances are being combed over forensically based on Prince Andrew's relationships with some unsavory characters. They should have just disappeared for a little while and then maybe King Charles could have positioned them in some comfy situation. But I think that it's hard for people to forget about the embarrassment of Prince Andrew with his daughters front and center.
- [21:04]
B
Absolutely. I don't think William's going to be pleased about this at all. And I agree with you that it's, you know, again, Megan, if you want to know what your future looks like, look at what's going on with your closest living relative. I mean, reputationally, Sarah Ferguson, AKA Fergie. She is being investigated for misappropriating charity funds for her own Fergie who?
- [21:29]
A
Fergie, who played herself on Friends. Megan, who's playing herself in a new Amazon MGM movie.
- [21:35]
B
They are twins, apparently. I heard the producers of that film were livid because they wanted her cameo to be a surprise. And what did Megan do but leaked it leaked.
- [21:44]
A
It allegedly leaks at the day William lands in Rio for Earthshot classic.
- [21:51]
B
I feel no sympathy for anybody who gets in bed with these people whatsoever. You know exactly who you're getting. You're getting snakes in the grass. Last Megan bit. Before we move on, it was announced on her Instagram on Monday that the holiday, the long awaited Holiday edition of With Love Megan. And by the way, every time I go to type in like With Love Megan when we're doing like a nerve master list for any given show, I almost, I always have. I almost write M, E, G Y N because that's the real With Love Megan. That's the one worth watching. I always have to stop myself. And I'm like, no, it's that other Megan. Yeah, the bad Megan, not the good Megan. But so she announced on her Instagram on Monday, with Love, Meghan holiday celebration coming December 3rd on Netflix. So what did I. Oh, the tagline. Embracing traditions and making new ones. You could say that again, sister. So then I went right over to Netflix's Instagram and guess what? Netflix, it's not to be found on that.
- [22:50]
A
Well, I have the press release. I have the press release. Do you want to hear the press release?
- [22:53]
B
Oh, I'd love it.
- [22:54]
A
Yeah, they sent it to me today. It says, this December, join Megan in Montecito for a magical holiday celebration. Together friends and family, deck the halls, create holiday feasts, craft heartfelt gifts and share lots of laughs with simple how to's to follow at home. It's a holiday wonder with warmth, tradition, and a generous dose of joy. I do love the tagline about embracing traditions and making new ones because you kind of have to make new ones when you have no friends or family. Like every time someone new shows up because you can't keep anybody around, you are creating a new tradition. But peep the date. Remember she told Fortune's most powerful women that it was being released in November. That's right. Keep the date December 3rd, which will nicely conflict with Catherine, Princess of Wales's Carol concert. Megan, you are atrocious and we see through you. You are, you're whatever the opposite of the Christmas spirit is.
- [23:50]
B
Okay, keep trying, Megan. Keep trying to compete with somebody who does not think about you at all and is head and shoulders above you and is going down in the history books as the Queen of England and the mother of a future monarch who has helped keep the royal family intact. You know, Bill from Brooklyn and I are going to talk a little bit later about the infamous one way rivalry between star Yankees players Alex Rodriguez and Derek Jeter. And Alex Rodriguez was forever like roiled with jealousy and envy over Derek Jeter and how much New York effing loved that guy and still loves that guy and just his talents and his facility and the respect he had of his team. He was the captain. And Alex could never figure out why New York never warmed to him and, in fact, often hated his guts. And he's still consumed with Derek Jeter, who never paid the guy any mind. Once he was done with him, he was done with him. It's a very, very similar dynamic. I have to ask you about two other or three other figures in the culture, Oprah and Gayle. Now, Oprah and Gayle also attended the Kris Jenner 70th bacchanal, and they're not. Oprah's not even pretending anymore that Stedman is a part of her life or should be. Her plus one, Paula Stedman. So I just want to say this is an email that the Nerve sent out Monday morning, okay, To Steadman's email address. And we also DM'd him. Dear Stedman, this is I'm reading verbatim from the Nerve. We are concerned, are you still alive? If so, where in the world are you? Warm regards, Marlena, Senior Producer, the Nerve. We have yet to hear back. Okay. We have yet to hear back.
- [25:48]
A
I know when it's like, if there's something going on with him, we would want to know, so we could send good vibes or whatever, but the fact that he just has disappeared completely. And it's always Oprah in her leather pants now and her sunglasses at night, it's alarming. And also, like, it's giving a little Whitney and Robin.
- [26:13]
B
It is. Thank you for saying it. It is. Now, they have always denied this, and as recently as July 2024, the LA Times did a piece on this, like, are they. And the headline was, are they girlfriends or girl? Are they girlfriends? Meaning friends who are girls are girlfriends. And Oprah said, and I quote, the reason I'm gonna do my Oprah voice, okay? The reason why the rumor irritates me is because it means that somebody must think I'm lying. That she said at the time, wherever that whatever that time was, that's number one. Number two, why would you want to hide it? That is not the way I run my life. She is a effing liar. She was on Ozempic while she was a stakeholder in and a Weight watcher for Weight Watchers. And she was telling the women of America, primarily, hey, do it. Count your calories. Calories point system. Then she was getting outed as being on Ozempic. So she came clean. And then to do like, you know, clean up reputationally, she did two primetime specials on ABC all about Ozempic. Okay? So she can F off. And Gail is a liability because Gail is about to get fired from cbs and it's gonna be humiliating, and I can't wait. Now onto Michelle Obama, who just did. You know, you and I. Our favorite podcaster, Jamie Carnlima. Megan got there first. You know, all these people, they're, like, swimming in the same, like, they're swimming in the same, like, filthy pool. Like, imagine, like, if you would have said this, like, even 10 years ago. Oprah's a loser. Gail is a loser. I mean, that's not that great of a stretch. Michelle Obama is a loser, and Meghan Markle came on the scene and has befouled them all. So Michelle Obama went on Jamie Kern Lima's pod and complained about listening.
- [28:11]
A
Everything. Everything.
- [28:12]
B
Yeah. This specifically is. We're promoting our book about how beautiful and stylish we are, even though whitey makes her wear her hair. A white woman. You know, listen, it's not her fault, guys, that she had to have a glam squad in the White House. And if anything, it was a real pain in the ass. Here we go.
- [28:31]
E
Yeah, well, I didn't. I didn't really have that choices first lady.
- [28:35]
B
Right.
- [28:36]
E
Every day, every time I was up, as we called it, you know, I was up for the public. And the days were long. So as you mentioned, to save time.
- [28:47]
A
Yes.
- [28:47]
E
You know, I. I know having a glam team, a trifecta, it feels like a luxury, but it was a time, time necessity. There's absolutely no way that I would be able to do my hair and makeup.
- [29:03]
A
I know. I'm like, I'm over here doing my own eyeliner, you know, because where is.
- [29:07]
E
The woman that can live off the rack? Yes. You know.
- [29:11]
B
Oh, my God.
- [29:12]
A
Oh, my God. She just said.
- [29:14]
B
This is who she's selling her book to, by the way. The average American woman. Hey, where's the woman who could live off the rack? Those losers you're hoping her name is.
- [29:23]
A
Her name is Catherine, Princess of Wales, who shops at Top Shop and shops at, like, you know, Catherine, the Princess of Wales wears the same clothes you and I can buy. You know what I mean?
- [29:34]
B
I loathe Michelle Obama. I have come to full, like, there's no going back. I loathe this woman. She's charging59.99 for this hardcover book about how beautiful she is and what a role model she is. And then she's saying, what woman could possibly live off the rack, you loser peasants? Oh, and those days could be long. Tell it to the single mother who's working two jobs. Michelle, who you want to buy your overpriced ode to yourself. Is she Kidding. Now we're going to end it. We're going to end it with this Instagram post. This real Michelle put up of herself dancing with her team, who she calls insufferably the trifecta. But there's more than three people on this team, as we're about to see in this reel, as they were forced at metaphorical gunpoint to dance and look happy while warming up for the star attraction. Here we go.
- [30:32]
C
Go crazy.
- [30:35]
B
It's like a dance lineup. Every member of the team has to come in. It's like, oh, this is so embarrassing.
- [30:42]
A
Honestly, I'm so glad that I don't work anywhere.
- [30:45]
B
Here comes Michelle. Look at the expression on her face. She's, like, smirking. Okay, we can end it. She's, like, smirking, and she's got, like, one eye, like. Like this. And she's like, look at how effing glamorous I am. It's just like. It's. It's insufferable.
- [31:08]
A
Similar to Meghan Markle. People were saying years ago that this woman could run for president, and now she's trying to shill books on podcasts. I mean, oh, how the mighty have fallen. You know, when. If I were in on Megan's team or Michelle Obama's team, I would have taken those headlines and I would have done something so much more with them. But we have two women that, like, have these insufferable podcasts where they're talking down to the people that are giving them the time of day or putting any sort of money in their pockets. You know, it's unbelievable. And I cannot believe how nasty she is about her own husband. So, you know, I'm. I'm with you when it comes to Michelle Obama. I wish I liked her. I wish I felt like she was contributing anything positive to society, but she just seems to be bitching all the time.
- [31:58]
B
She's bitching. She's ungrateful. She's a narcissist. I believe she's a mega narcissist. A malignant one. Just my opinion. And if the Nerve is doing its job, we know that this book is going to hit the New York Times bestseller list in its first week out. That is a given. But if the Nerve is doing its job, it will fall right off. It will fall right the fuck off. As it should.
- [32:18]
A
Well, yeah, I believe in you.
- [32:20]
B
I believe in you. Sorry to curse. You're so, like, polite, and I'm like, the opposite. But thank you. Thank you for coming on to talk all things Meghan Markle. Oprah and Gayle and Michelle Obama and we will see you soon.
- [32:35]
A
Thank you.
- [32:36]
B
Thanks Kinsey. Coming up, we have a new recommendation.
- [32:41]
E
And.
- [32:44]
B
An ask for you guys for a future Nerve event. Plus your email. Back in a minute. Today's show is brought to you by Oxford Natural, home of the all natural, Optimum Day and Optimum Night supplements. Are you trying to lose weight after having a baby? Prepping for your wedding, or just ready to feel like yourself again? Thousands of men and women across the US and UK are already doing it with Oxford Natural. Optimum Day powers you with steady energy, it crushes cravings and it keeps your metabolism firing all day. Optimum Night helps you relax, sleep deeply, recover and keep burning fat while you rest. England soccer legend Michael Owen lost 40 pounds and Robbie, the face of AFTV, dropped over 100 pounds. It has worked for others too, with customer testimonials raving about Oxford Naturals effectiveness. Now it's your turn. Scan the QR code or click the Link and grab 70% off your first order with code Nerve. No gimmicks, no needles, just results. Oxford Natural. Let's get to work.
- [33:55]
E
Come to DSW for the shoes, stay for the fun. Because let's be honest, if shoe shopping isn't fun, are you even doing it right? So go ahead, try something new. Try something different, good different. Try something that feels like you, you.
- [34:11]
B
Know, the real you.
- [34:12]
E
And then definitely brag about it later. Because at DSW you've got unlimited free freedom to play. Find the shoes that get you at prices that get your budget at DSW stores or@dsw.com Let us surprise you.
- [34:28]
B
We are back. Now, before we get into your feedback, I would like to give a recommendation for the new Vince Gilligan show that has just begun streaming on Apple tv. It is called Pluribus. It stars Rhea Seehorn, who I'd never seen her anywhere before Vince Gilligan's Better Call Saul, which was the prequel he did, but that aired as a sequel to Breaking Bad. And Better Call Saul is even better than Breaking Bad and Rhea Seehorn starred in it and she, she blew everybody's minds. People were like, where has this woman been forever? Like she's an incredible actress. I'd never seen a female character written that way either. If you haven't seen that show, absolutely worth watching. First episode of Better Call Saul. The beginning, it's a little bit self indulgent. You just fast forward through it, you know, and just go right in and it just, it ramps up, ramps up and it never lets go and it Grabs you by the throat. Pluribus has this incredible premise in which it's a little bit Invasion of the Body Snatchers, it's a little bit, you know, you'll see bits and pieces of other sci fi films and television in there, but basically a mind virus. A virus takes control of humanity and some people don't make it. A lot of people do make it. The ones who make it are. They all have a. It's a hive mind and they're all like relentlessly, like positive. And Rhea Seehorn plays this self loathing romantasy writer who is inoculated to. For whatever reason, she doesn't catch like this version. It's like Covid. It's a Covid allegory is what it is. And she remains very, very much herself. And she's informed that There are only 11 other people in the world who are like her. And then it goes from there. And I can tell it's gonna be very, very spiky and unpredictable and tonally it's like so singular. I love it. I love. So far, I'm into it. I think you guys would like it as well. Pluribus, Apple tv. Okay, to your feedback. This is from troublemaker Tammy regarding the Golden Bachelor segment we did last week. And oh my God, did we get a ton of feedback to that. And by the way, one or two of you Troublemakers on the YouTube feed were saying that Gary slash Jerry had his first wife who died of an infection one month after they moved into their dream retirement home. And this baller gets back in the Dating Game like days later, he had her cremated. I forget what state this was in. It might have been Indiana, but I would hope that that police department opens an investigation. I really would. And I would advise the ladies of America to steer clear. Hi Maureen. I just finished the Friday edition and had to get in touch with you. The segment about the Golden Bachelor gave me a chill down my spine. I immediately remembered the Dating Game. It was the one that the guy that won the date. It was the guy interviewing three women from behind a panel. Turned out to be a serial killer. He did. He was the serial killer known as Not Jon Hammond, who also did the Dating Game. No, no, no, no, no. The night stalker, Rodney Alpaca, I think his name was. So yeah, I think the Golden Bachelor is much in that vein. Just my opinion. Gary slash Jerry Turner. Don't buy his book. Hi, Maureen. I am a bit shocked that the mainstream media has stayed silent regarding Ryan Reynolds crimes. We covered his arson, his self admitted arson burned down his elementary school in Canada. He has since joked about it and there's been silence. And we know people in the industry watch this show. We know. We know people in Hollywood watch this show. We know people in media watch this show. I don't understand either, friend. I don't. From this troublemaker. Does Ryan have his dirty hands on something that prevents the media from reporting or is it celebrity worshiping? Anyway, I hope one day he and his tarantula of a wife get savagely bitten by karma. Seriously, where is the media on this? Where are they? Okay. Hi, Maureen. You are probably aware. I am, but this still bears repeating that Jack Schlossberg plans to run for Congress. He's rolling around town teasing this run in his murder van on Instagram. I guess he recognizes there's an appetite for spoiled, rich Nepo babies with zero accomplishments in New York politics. I'm looking forward to your snarking coverage. You and me both. Elizabeth Gilbert. Hi, Maureen. Happy Friday. This troublemaker wrote last Friday I came across this video posted two months ago with the dreadful Liz Gilbert where she actually admits she is a bad person. To the wood chipper she must go. And here is the thumbnail from said podcast. The head shaven cult leader wearing this expression, Liz Gilbert quote, I'm afraid that I am fundamentally a bad person. When these people tell you who they are, believe them. Kristen Bell, our last one. Maureen. Am I mistaken or do I remember an interview a while ago from Kristen where she discussed she and Dax their parenting style of allowing their girls to decide when they would shower or that she would only make them shower once or twice a week? I'm pretty sure it was her. Do you remember this troublemaker, Terry? I did not, but producer Marlena went and looked it up right away and sent me the People magazine interview in which Kristen Bell said, hey, you know what? Dax and I, you know how we know when to have our girls bathe? Bathe them. We wait until they stink. These are the same people who locked at least one of their daughters when she was three years old in her bedroom on a door that locked from the outside. These people are terrible. They're terrible parents. I don't understand how CPS has yet to pay a visit anyway. Okay, so next we are gearing up. We are gearing up for our inaugural Nerve Awards to. We're gonna stream them in December. So we want you guys to tell us, you troublemakers, who you think is deserving, what categories you would like to see, who you would like to see nominated, who you think is a runaway winner. I've got one in my mind that is a slam dunk. Okay, this winner, you're gonna die. Okay, so email me DM me. DM the Nerve show we're going to put up a proper poll in the coming days, but let us know what you think and then as always, you know where to find me. Maureenevilmakehairmedia.com DM me on Instagram at Maureen Callahan Writer or Henerve show and remember to subscribe to our new Nerve Sub stack. We're like week three or week four. I think we are. The nerve show.subsub substack.com Coming up, Bill from Brooklyn will be here with his hot takes on some offenders in major sport and culture. See you in a minute. Are you looking to support more Made in the USA manufacturing this holiday season? Whether it's home decor, clothing or unique gifts, it's become harder than ever to find high quality products that aren't made overseas. Small businesses in this country are struggling to stay afloat, and with the likes of Amazon and Target dominating the holiday market, it's no wonder that's where a Warehouse comes in. Your one stop shop for artisanal one of a kind gifts. With products from over 100 different vendors, they are deeply committed to supporting American makers and manufacturers. They're easy to navigate. Online marketplace lets you browse a wide range of independent creators. You can feel good knowing that your purchase supports real people and ethical business practices. This holiday season. Explore Warehouse's gift guides and holiday collection featuring handmade ornaments, greeting cards, thoughtful gifts under $50 and more. Made in the USA favorites that make any gift truly meaningful. 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- [44:14]
E
From DSW this is your reminder that shoes are a gift.
- [44:18]
B
Literally.
- [44:19]
E
So unwrap something good, like boots that inspire your next big adventure, or cozy slippers that give you an excuse to stay in, or sneakers that feel like pure joy. Because shoes aren't just shoes, they're exactly what you wanted. Let us surprise you so you can surprise them. Find shoes that get you and everyone on your list at prices that get your budget at DSW stores or dsw.com a better help ad this November. BetterHelp is encouraging people to reach out, grab lunch with an old friend, call your parents, or even find Support in therapy. BetterHelp makes it easy with its therapist match commitment and over 12 years of online therapy experience, matching members with qualified professionals. And just like that, lunch with an old friend. Once you do reach out, you'll wonder, why didn't I do this sooner? Start now@betterhelp.com for 10% off your first month.
- [45:17]
B
We are back and today we are joined by none other than your fave and mine, Bill from Brooklyn to talk some sports world slash cultural offenders. And this one, I texted Bill immediately when I saw this was happening because this is something like, Bill is way more into sports than I am, but we are both equally into getting into people's psyches and really trying to figure out, like, what is animating them. First up is this new HBO Max documentary. It's three parts. It's called Alex versus a Rod concerning one Alex Rodriguez, who has a very troublesome history. Now, I first, I first got flagged to this as you know, I do. I take all the flack for you guys. I was watching the Today show and saw, I knew this was a very serious interview for the Today show because there weren't 80 useless hosts on the stage, each getting to ask a celebrity one question. No, no, no. They gave this right to Craig Melvin. It was a one on one and Craig was taking it to a Rod, asking him about this documentary, which began streaming over the weekend or Thursday, you can look it up. But whether this documentary is actually all about reputational rehab to get Alex, who is infamously turfed for juicing doping, whether this was is trying to get him into the hall of Fame. So first we're gonna listen to a Rod dance around this and try to make it seem really like. No, not at all. Not at all. Here we go.
- [47:05]
C
I wanna be honest with you. I was watching it and there was a part of me about halfway through the third episode and I started, I started thinking, well, maybe hang on. Maybe part of his motivation is obviously, you know, you don't need the money. Part of the motivation is maybe the hall of Fame. Maybe a Rod really does think, because the reality is your numbers are better than 90% of the folks who are in Cooperstown. Maybe this is part of a campaign to get into the hall of Fame.
- [47:31]
D
Yeah, that's totally fair. We'll go the other way. Now that you saw it. I'm definitely not going in the hall of Fame.
- [47:37]
B
We.
- [47:37]
D
Which is, you know, that I knew the rules I broke, I broke the rules. And if that's the penalty, that that's completely on me.
- [47:46]
B
Okay, then A Rod does what he does best and immediately reverses himself. Here he is with Craig, like a minute later.
- [47:56]
C
Your first coach, Lou Piniella from Seattle days. In the doc, he talks about how you should be in the hall of Fame. What say you? Do you deserve to. Yes or no? Don't couch it. Do you deserve to be in the hall of Fame?
- [48:08]
E
Of course.
- [48:09]
D
Of course.
- [48:10]
B
Okay, Bill, now, A Rod has been a topic of conversation between you and I, you and me, for years. You took a look at the documentary, as did I. Episode one. Tell me your thoughts on the heels of that Today show contradiction.
- [48:28]
D
So my first thought and I text you over the weekend was that A Rod has a great PR team. After watching just a small clip of another interview, then I watched a documentary and then I watched that interview. And I'm not so impressed by the PR team anymore because there's word for word statements in both the documentary and that interview. If you're genuinely apologetic for something, your message will be the same, but the words will be different. And I didn't see that from A Rod.
- [49:02]
B
That is a great point. You know, A Rod has always been such a. Like, New York never liked him. And I think it's because we're gonna get into the Jeter quote, unquote, rivalry. It's a one way street. But I think the reason New York never, ever really embraced A Rod, even though he was a native New Yorker and lived here until he was about 8 and then his parents moved to the Dominican Republic then back here is because New Yorkers can spot a bullshitter and a phony. And that's what a Rod is. He's a bullshitter and a phony.
- [49:37]
D
We want someone that's going to come to work every day, work hard, just like we do. I mean, and that's not even, you know, native to New York. That's everywhere.
- [49:47]
B
But like, do you want to see that lunch pail mentality and period, like living in New York City and working in New York City, it is a specific kind of grind and it's specific kind of hustle you have to have in order to get anywhere here. And you're so right about that. A Rod flounced in and he was like, I'm here and I'm going to eclipse Jeter. And everyone was like, no, you're not.
- [50:15]
D
So he, he tried that even before he got to got to New York. When those two came up There was actually another shortstop out there named no More Garcia Para from the Red Sox too. And it was kind of argument going around who was the better shortstop, who was going to have the better career. Because they were all similar in that they were redefining the position. Used to be small guys that played it, now these were big strong guys. And Jeter just had the immediate success and the team success, legendary legacy success. And A Rod was a great player and statistically better than everyone. But I think if you would have went through Major League Baseball and said, who would you rather have on your team? And you were given a choice, I can't see anyone not choosing Jeter for what he did for the Yankees.
- [51:03]
B
This is so fascinating to me because in the first part of the doc, we get into Alex Rodriguez as like a phenom, a prodigy and technically superior to just about anybody. Like everybody who encountered the guy was like, this is a star. Like he's going the whole way. But this is, you know, there's talk about this too in like the arts. Like when it comes to say what makes a great singer, what makes a great vocalist, Technically you could be superior to anybody. But if you lack heart, if you lack soul, if you lack grit, doesn't matter. You know, you may not be the technically greatest singer in the world, but like, if you've got something to say in a way to communicate it, that grabs people by the throat, by the heart, like, you win, you win. That's what people want to hear. Now before we get to one of A Rod's other attempts to rehab himself, I've got to revisit this with you because I think this was the moment A Rod took a dive among New Yorkers never to recover. He was caught by a camera at the Super bowl in 2011 getting fed. Getting hand fed popcorn by Cameron Diaz, who was looking at him adoringly. And he wasn't even looking at her. He was like tilting his head and opening his mouth towards her and then keeping like his eye on the feels. Do you remember this?
- [52:28]
D
I. I do and it makes me sad because I actually, I like Cameron Diaz and I, I really want to just kind of not remember or ignore this part of, of. Of their, her life. Their life. It just. No reason for it to be out there. It's just. A Rod is just a disgusting human being. I just, I guess everybody makes mistakes. Hers is just publicly done.
- [52:54]
B
I know, I know. I mean there was a. When A Rod was at his like physical apex, like a Listers were falling all over themselves to get to this guy. It was Cameron Diaz, it was Madonna. Their affair allegedly broke up his marriage. Although the New York Post did catch him on the road exiting the tour bus or entering his hotel with a woman who had the build bill of a pro male wrestler.
- [53:20]
D
Well, he actually did date a pro male female wrestler.
- [53:23]
B
That's right. And I think, you know, this gets to some of a Rod's issues.
- [53:28]
D
Could be the other thing I go back to thinking about with this, if this is really a redemption tour right in the beginning of the, you know, not to give anything away, but he speaks about mental health and I think that's really an insult to people who are out there actually struggling with their mental health. This is just an asshole that is trying to find a way to redemption so we can get into the hall of fame. So his path to doing that is to create a documentary that his daughters, his daughters are going to have to see. Right. His 17 year old daughter. And I'm going to speak from experience here, right. I have been through the teenage years. I'm on my way, going through it again. And there's a certain point that you're just a public embarrassment just by breathing air. Now his teenage daughter is going to get to revisit publicly father cheating on her mother with Madonna and that was the end of the marriage and then everything else that goes along with it. So way to go a route.
- [54:30]
B
Way to go A Rod. A couple of things to exactly what you just said. He opens this documentary by saying the well rehearsed line that was run by a series of publicist managers, agents, crisis managers, and people who may or may not help him get into that hall of fame that you know, he's just dying for. He's dying for it. He says, you know, this isn't so much a baseball story as it is really a mental health story. To which I say, bullshit. That is the current lingua franca of assholes who try to explain away their asshole behavior. They're lying, they're cheating. There's a clip of Alex Rodriguez in this documentary being asked point blank, are you juicing? That's what everybody's saying. You're doping, you're using steroids, you're using illegal PEDs. And he looks straight at this guy without blinking and goes, no, no, he's a liar. He's a liar and he's a cheat. And to say this is a mental health story does such a disservice and is so insulting to people who are actually dealing with mental health issues. This is not a Mental health story. There's no, like, mental illness is distinctly different than personality disorders. And Alex Rodriguez has a major effing personality disorder. It's called, just my opinion, malignant narcissism. This is a guy who's, both of his daughters, their middle name is Alexander. Okay? He had a portrait, at least one, maybe two, of himself as a centaur, which is like a mythological creature. Half, half, Bottom half is a. Is a stallion. Top half is a rod hanging over his bed. Do you remember this?
- [56:07]
D
I don't remember it, but I was so happy that you pointed it out to me today. I mean, I can't even imagine, like, where did the thought come from to do that?
- [56:17]
B
Not only the thought, but then you got to commission it, Bill. Then you gotta, like hire an artist. So you've got to interview, have your people interview a bunch of artists. And then you've gotta show them some reference photo, like images, like of what you would like to hang over your bed. Gotta size that thing out. Gotta get it framed. Gotta get it mounted, as it were. Us Weekly staff, October this is a piece took the Us Weekly staff to pen this piece of investigative reportage. October 30, 2009, quote, he was so vain, 1x tells Us Weekly, quote, He had not one, but two painted portraits of himself as a centaur. You know, the half man, half horse figure. Okay, here's a rod on Jimmy Fallon 10 years ago. This aired originally October 30, 2015. Now, Jimmy Fallon has never met a famous or fame adjacent person. He doesn't ball over, just fall all over himself, you know, when they're sitting next to him. So when he says a celebrity hates him and when he goes in on a celebrity, you know it's bad. And this is yet another realm in which Alex Rodriguez has distinguished himself. We're gonna take a look at this. First clip Jimmy Fallon telling a rod to his face that he thinks a rod hates him.
- [57:45]
F
I never thought you would ever do the show because I think, I think. Yeah, I think you. I think you. I think you hate me. I don't think you like me. And I'll tell you, I'll tell you why before you answer, because here's what happens. I go to the game, I'm very excited. Sometimes I wear your shirts. Anything, you know, I'm like waving at you. And you know, Lorne Michaels has really good seats. We sit right behind home plate. It's unbelievable. It's the best thing to watch you guys. And when, when Derek Jeter would come by in the on deck, circle. He'd look at me and give me the little, what's up? How you doing? Little tip of his cap. You come out, you look at Lauren, you give him tip, tip of the cap, and then you find me and you start swinging the bat as hard as you can. You go.
- [58:27]
B
Bill. I don't detect anything other than like real anger in Jimmy Fallon when he's doing that impression of A Rod angrily swinging the bat in his direction.
- [58:40]
D
That really had potential to be a very awkward and uncomfortable conversation. Would have been. I would have loved to have seen A Rod actually react as a human being to somebody directly confronting him about something like that.
- [58:53]
B
Well, you know what I think is also very telling in that little anecdote that Jimmy is presenting to A Rod. Jimmy pointedly describes Alex, the player and the person that A Rod most envied and most wished would be his best friend, Derek Jeter. Always tipping his hat to Lorne and Jimmy when he saw them while getting ready to go to bat.
- [59:23]
D
Well, if you, if you go back to the younger days when they were both coming up, you know, Jeter was winning the championships and, and A Rod was this otherworldly talent that was just the most physically gifted player on the field in any game he played. They were best friends. They used to stay at each other's apartments when they would play in each other's towns, really. And that completely fractured the relationship. Yeah, that, that. And then if you go, if you go back in time to when A Rod first came to the Yankees, when he was traded from the Rangers to the Yankees in that press conference, Derek Jeter is there and doesn't look very happy. Puts on a show, put, you know, he's a good soldier, but doesn't look happy to have him as a teammate.
- [60:07]
B
So we're going to get back, we're going to circle back to A Rod and Jeter in one second. But I want to get to another part of this Jimmy Fallon interview with A Rod. Now, Jimmy is ostensibly going to help Alex Rod Rodriguez clean up yet another public relations disaster. A Rod did a cover story for Details magazine. I believe this was a cover story and a photo shoot that this is before Instagram, but did go viral. And it was an image of Alex Rodriguez wearing a shirtless tee, standing in front of a mirror and putting his hands in the mirror. What, looked around his own waist and kissing himself in the mirror. And so Jimmy sets this up, this non rehearsed bit up. And Jimmy's gonna pull the photo out by asking Alex what he would tell now that he's turned 40 and Alex is totally humorless about it, he's like, yeah, really suck ducks being 40. He asks what Alex would tell his 20 year old self. Here we go.
- [61:19]
D
I would probably just keep it simple, enjoy yourself and remember to have fun. And let's see if you ever do a photo shoot. Don't kiss any mirrors.
- [61:29]
F
Don't kiss any mirrors.
- [61:30]
D
Not kiss any mirrors.
- [61:32]
F
I don't remember the photo you're talking about. When you kissed him, you were kissing a mirror. I don't remember that photo at all.
- [61:39]
B
There it is. It's like a dripping mouth kiss and he's like gazing at himself. It's beyond creepy.
- [61:48]
D
I mean, Bill, there's no time in my life and I've made a lot of mistakes. There is no time in my life where I ever would have even thought about doing something like that. And had anyone suggested it to me, I would probably never talk to him again like that. What goes through someone's mind, they must have just, he must have such a, just a high opinion himself that he thinks he can pull that off. No, it was the same as the, the shirtless picture he took in Central Park. Do you remember that? Right before the playoff game, a hot day was caught in Central park in the middle of one of his controversies, stunning himself on a rock, wearing jeans and no shirt like he was a regular person. But photographers just happen to be there.
- [62:38]
B
With, you know, photographers don't roam around Central park, which Monaco is the size of Central park. Okay? It is vast. It is deep. Like they're not just roaming around hoping they get a look at a celebrity in there. Not since the days of Jackie O. Sorry. Like strolling in Central park every day. A Rod is such an asshole. Like he's trying to laugh it off like, like, oh, if anybody suggests you kiss me, it's probably his idea. It was probably his idea. Now, the root of A Rod's rage. And you and I are going to talk about this as this documentary progresses. Which, by the way, I just have to make an aside. One of the producers of the A Rod doc is Lindsay Shookus. Who is Lindsay Shookus? She was the producer at SNL who had a years long affair with Ben Affleck. They met on the set of snl. Jennifer Garner found out, ran to Lindsay's husband, said, I'm sorry to inform you your wife is having an affair with my husband and we got to break it up. And then went to Lindsay, allegedly reportedly to say, hey, leave my husband alone. And Lindsey was like, no, you tell him to leave me alone. I'm not the one married to him. This is an A rod, like all roads lead. And then A rod was engaged to Jennifer Lopez, who just got divorced from Ben. Like, they're all swimming in each other's juices. Okay? So that said, the root of A rod's issues, I'll leak back to in the doc. They're daddy issues. But they get transferred, I believe, to Derek Jeter, who was daddy of the Yankees. He was made captain. He was revered by his teammates and by the city of New York. Okay? Not easy to do. New York is a tough town. This guy could do no wrong. He was allegedly passing herpes around like, you know, nobody cared. Okay, so we're going to look at one of the most famous plays in Yankees history. Okay? This is the Yanks versus the Red Sox. A home game, July 1, 2004. It has gone down in history as the dive. Let's go. And then, Bill, you take it on the back end.
- [64:46]
C
1, 2. He loops at the left field. Going to be a tough play. Jeter on the run, makes the play and flies into the stands. Oh, what a play by Derek Jeter.
- [64:57]
B
Derek Jeter went head first into the seats, the metal seats. He stands up. His face is bloody.
- [65:05]
C
Jeter really banged himself up.
- [65:07]
B
He's checking to see if you can see the redness in his face.
- [65:09]
D
He caught the bar of that box.
- [65:12]
B
What a play. Crowd is out of its mind, Bill.
- [65:18]
D
So if you rewind that video, just pause it just a second before it switch frames to G. To going into the stands. There's a rod with his hands up, and he's kind of lightly jogging towards the ball because it's a game in the middle of July and it doesn't mean that much. Right? This is who. This is who he is.
- [65:39]
B
Right? It's.
- [65:41]
D
I'm not going to put myself in. In jeopardy of maybe getting hurt. Or even one horse even makes it.
- [65:46]
B
Look like it's all about his efforts.
- [65:48]
D
And then you have.
- [65:49]
B
He's not going to get bruised and banged up or maybe lose a tooth or need plastic surgery. Jeter's like, effort. I'm going in head first.
- [65:57]
D
Listen, a rod might have, you know, pulled a hamstring. If he ran a little bit harder, he wasn't going into the stands. We know that. But then you have the guy that's coming to work every day giving their. His fans everything they want. And then, if I'm not mistaken, the very next day was Yankees played at Shea Stadium, the Shay State or City Field. And Gita led that came off and got a standing ovation from those fans.
- [66:20]
B
I mean, Mets fans loathe the Yankees. Loath.
- [66:26]
D
Yeah. But now, going back to tying the Mets into this. Before A Rod went to the Texas Rangers on what at the time was the richest contract in sports was 10 years, 252 million, 3. It was almost a foregone conclusion that he was going to sign with the Mets. He was. It was the rumors all throughout the season leading up to his free agency. He was going to sign with the Mets. He's going to be a player, you know, their. Their focal point of their team. And then the Mets backed out of it publicly. Their GM, Steve Phillips, said, I don't want a 24 +1 player. Meaning a Rod had so many demands that were outside the norm for every other player on that team. Whatever it was special, you know, planes, whatever it was, they saw through it then in 2000, that this was not the player that they wanted on a team. And that's how he ended up in Texas, where the Texas Rangers gave him all the money they had. Couldn't afford anybody else, because A Rod had it all. And the team was terrible.
- [67:26]
B
Oh, my God, I love this. I love these details, which I had no idea about. So we're going to revisit A Rod through episode two and episode three, and, man, are we gonna give it to him at the end. We're gonna come back to Derek Jeter, who, you know, they don't. That Jeter is like, if you get a guy like that, a player like that, a city character like that, once in a generation you're lucky. I mean, these guys are rare. Okay, I wanna move on to two other guys with you before I have to let you go. Tom Brady announced that he cloned his dead dog. The cost for you and I, if we were to do such a thing, and I'm curious as to your thoughts, would be $50,000, conservatively. And, you know, Tom Brady never does anything without an angle. And guess what? He's got a stake in this biotech company. And so this is why we're seeing photos of Tom cuddling his cloned dog. Bill, what do you think?
- [68:28]
D
I mean, there's just so many things moral, morally and ethically wrong with this. And I mean, you get, you know, if you're a real. If you really love your animal, and you know that that animal is going to pass, it happens to a soul. You don't want another one, right? You just. You had that one. You love that dog. You couldn't get another one. And it'll be a totally different dog and you'll love that differently, but it's still your dog. Why? I. I guess maybe it's just, I'm so rich, I can do this and you can't. I. I don't know. I don't know. It can't be the money. It can't be the advertisement that he was able to clone his dog. And, you know, he needs more money. He's got more than he'll ever need to spend. I don't know.
- [69:14]
B
My theory about Tom Brady, and you just see it in his physical presentation, in the cosmetic surgery he's allegedly reportedly had, is that he's all about perfection. And that dog was probably in his mind, the most perfect dog he ever had. And he's not going to the shelter to get a loser.
- [69:31]
D
You know what, you know what's perfect though?
- [69:35]
B
What?
- [69:36]
D
That his, his ex wife's new husband or baby daddy, whatever, whatever he is, could beat the out of him. And there's nothing Tom Brady can do about it. That has got to hit him at the core.
- [69:48]
B
It's a great point. It didn't even occur to me, but it's a great point. Okay, our last guy, Mark Sanchez. I am obsessed with this story. Mark Sanchez, former NFL star turned highly paid Fox Sports broadcaster. A few weeks ago, he got into some weird fight with like an elderly truck driver. Like he. So Mark Sanchez's version of events is that he was out at, outside his hotel, he was on location for covering a game for Fox, got up at 4am to go do some like, runs in the alley on the side of his hotel or the back of his hotel. A likely story. And then comes upon this truck driver at the Westin Hotel loading dock and is like, hey man, you can't unload your shit here. And the truck driver took umbrage and they got into a fight. The truck driver is 69 and he beat the truck driver so savagely he almost died. He was in the hospital. If you wanna see what he looked like, I've put a photo up on the carousel I did on Instagram. I have theories about what really went down here, Bill. I suspect you might as well.
- [71:11]
D
Yeah, so let me say this from, from experience here. So a truck driver, very hard job, physically demanding, taxing. That job that guy was doing, picking up grease from, from hotels, restaurants. It's. It's a smelly, dirty job. And then on top of it, he's doing it at night, which means your life is completely Upside down, right? The personal sacrifices this man is making to be there at night to earn a living at 70 years old because he can't retire for whatever reason, right? So all the struggles this, this elderly gentleman has going to work every day, just every night to provide for. For himself, his family, whatever it is. And then he runs into to Mark Sanchez, who. Four in the morning, wind sprints. I'm going to guess he had something that helped energize him that he needed to get out that energy, you know, to do that additional exercise in, in the, in the alley. And I mean, to attack an old man. There's just. There's a special place in hell for a guy like Mark Sanchez.
- [72:18]
B
Can I give you my theory, and I agree with everything you said, everything you said about truck driving being one of the most physically grueling jobs. You can do what you've got to pick up what you've got to load on, load off, dispose of. The hours are brutal. The noise itself can, like, render you deaf. You know, driving a truck like that. I think just my opinion, if I'm. If I'm investigating this case, you know, my dream is to get cast as a judge on Law and Order. Law and Order. Excuse me. I think Mark Sanchez was out looking for some rough trade. I think Mark Sanchez was out looking for some gay sex. That's what I think.
- [72:57]
D
You think?
- [72:58]
B
So, stumbled on the wrong guy. And I think this guy was like, f off, man. I'm just trying to load up some cooking grease, get out of my face. And Mark was enraged because why else assault somebody like this to the point where you almost kill them?
- [73:12]
D
I don't know. I don't know. And listen, I'll say this from, from, from my own experience. I mean, I've worked in some rough neighborhoods overnight, and generally people that are out there working don't get messed with, even for things that are going on in the street that are, you know, not always legal, generally the working person is left alone and ignored. It's.
- [73:35]
B
Why is that?
- [73:36]
D
I think there's just a respect of the job that you're doing out there in the middle of the night. You're not out there to harm anybody. You're doing your thing. You keep your head straight and just do your job and move on.
- [73:47]
B
And you're keeping their community clean.
- [73:50]
D
Right? So. And for this instance, you know, usually if it, you know, if someone's going to bother you with somebody with some type of mental illness or high or drunk or something like this, you may have hit the nail on the head. I didn't think of that theory. That's an interesting theory.
- [74:07]
B
I thought had that theory.
- [74:09]
D
No, no, no. I. I thought maybe he might have found something extra in the bar bathroom that gave him a little bit of additional energy that he didn't have before and, and had to go out and relive his, his years of playing for the New York Jets. Running into his offensive lineman's ass with his face first. I don't know.
- [74:31]
B
I don't think so. You know what this reminds me of? Nothing so much as. Remember when Rand Paul was viciously assaulted by his male neighbor and we were all told it was over a fight about a lawnmower? What did you. And I think. Yeah, yeah, gay sex gone wrong. Somebody got scorned. Maybe he's got daddy issues again. I'm just, I'm just, I'm just spitballing. I don't know. I don't know what's going on in his head. What do I know? Just, just my, just my opinion, Bill. Thank you.
- [75:01]
D
That would make a great Law and Order though, wouldn't it?
- [75:04]
B
They should, they should pick this. I. They should pick up this thread. I want to see the marks. Let's make it a Special Victims Unit episode. Okay? Make it maybe a two parter. Maybe we could get some former NFL players to cameo. That would be great.
- [75:21]
E
All right.
- [75:21]
B
Well, listen, Bill, thanks for joining. It's always like a thrill when you're on the nerve giving your hot takes for, you know, our manly men who always make sure to let us know they are strictly heterosexual. But they love the nerve. And it reminds you what it reminds me of. Do you remember? I'm not going to get you in trouble, but do you remember there was a time in your life where you admitted to me you were in your early 20s, maybe always a very manly dude that you would manage to somehow get a hold of. Your neighbors delivered subscribed to copies of Us Weekly and Star magazine and read them before the neighbors even noticed they were gone and then put them right back.
- [76:06]
D
Yeah, let me. So let me, let me. At the time I work nights, I would come home, it would be like 9, 10 o' clock in the morning, I'd get my mail, they were there. I go up, read the articles, go to sleep. It was an interesting light read to go to sleep. And on the way back out to work that night, six, seven o' clock at night, they going back in the mailbox. So technically they were delivered to the intended recipient the same day.
- [76:30]
B
Noted. I will let that one slide, my friend. Thank you. Thank you for joining us. And we will see you next Monday to talk more. Alex Rodriguez and his friend of me, Derek Jeter.
- [76:43]
D
Great talking to you.
- [76:44]
B
See you later. And that is it. That is it for your Tuesday edition of the Nerve. Come back and see us tomorrow for the Nerve at night with a cocktail or a coffee, depending on what time zone you're in. If you haven't already, be sure to check out our substack@thenerveshow.substack.com there's tons of great goodies in there that just couldn't make air. Be sure to subscribe. It's only like five bucks a month and you get a lot of bang for your buck and you help the show grow. Plus, get your Nerve merch over@shop thenerve.com for yourself or a fellow troublemaker. I can think of a few better stocking stuffers, if I may say so. And we are working on round two of merch for the holidays. Also, the Nerve is now available on Megan's podcast Playlist every Monday, Wednesday and Friday at 9am Eastern on Sirius XM channel 111, the Megyn Kelly channel. We will see you back here tomorrow at the Nerve, where you will never guess what we're about to say next.