← The Nerve with Maureen Callahan
The Nerve with Maureen Callahan
Oprah's Distasteful Video Drop, Bill Maher Challenges Mel Robbins, and Amy Schumer's Hypocrisy
01:01:44
Maureen Callahan delivers a massive takedown of a long list of repeat offenders, kicking off with Mel Robbins inability to defend her "Let Them" nonsense during an interview on "Real Time" with Bill Maher. Then she moves unleashes on Oprah's recent roundtable on family estrangement, showcasing individuals who have gone the way of "not contact " with their families and her decision to post the discussion online right before long Thanksgiving weekend. After that, Maureen has a full celebrity lightning round on Harry's social media post with Stephen acting like a Tik Tok tween, Gayle King exposing her uncertainty about CBS, Jennifer Aniston's inability to hold a door for her beau, and Michele Obama's embarrassing explanation for being "cool." Later, Maureen goes off on Amy Schumer's body image hypocrisy and her questionable reason for her massive weight loss. Cowboy Colostrum: Get 25% Off Cowboy Colostrum with code MAUREEN at https://www.cowboycolostrum.com/MAUREENVandy Crisps: Rea...
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- [00:00]
A
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Hello and welcome to your Friday edition of the Nerve. I am your host, Maureen Callahan. We have a ton of stuff to address.
- [01:00]
First, we've got some recidivists. Actually the whole show is full of like heavyweights who are recidivists. Bill Maher, okay, last week had Mel Robbins on his show, his first, his one on one that that initial interview he does. And you know, Mel was one of the Nerve's earliest targets. And so we're very excited to have another shot at this charlatan. Just my opinion. Then we are going to move on to Oprah, Oprah Winfrey, who may find herself at the end of this year's Nerve Awards, first annual in the wood chipper. She just did a show on the this concept that she calls a growing trend. I think it's been far too stubborn in the culture for far too long of people going no contact with their entire families of origin. So we're going to do an entire breakdown of that. Then we've got some sprinklings for you. Some stuff like little nibbles. Harry was on Colbert. Two losers who think they're winning. Gail, same thing. She still isn't aware of what her employment status is. All of us are aware. She she's not aware. Then we've got Michelle Obama who is doing us the favor of telling us how she got so fucking cool. And let me tell you something. If you're telling people that you're cool, you're not cool, okay? Plus we've got your feedback. And then we are going back in on Amy Schumer who has been posting some truly unhinged stuff and she deleted it. But the Internet is forever. And you and I, all of us troublemakers, it's happening, okay? It's a lot. It's a lot for your Friday edition of the Nerve. So settle in. Are you ready? Are you ready? Let's go.
- [03:00]
Today's show is sponsored by Cowboy Colostrum. Colostrum is the first milk that calves receive from their mothers after birth. And it's often called liquid gold because it's packed with proteins, natural growth factors and antimicrobials. Three things that can enhance your immune response, reduce inflammation, repair and balance gut lining and reduce bloating. It can even make your hair and skin look amazing. Cowboy Colostrum offers the highest quality cow colostrum in the US they don't over process or strip their colostrum. They leave it whole with full fat and high protein for ultimate nutrient density. It is sourced from 100% grass fed cows here in the United States with all natural ingredients and no artificial flavors. You can add Cowboy Colostrum to your coffee or smoothie. It's simple and easy to drink. I do it. I love the frother. I love the whole thing. For a limited time, our listeners will get up to 25% off their entire order. Just head over to cowboycolostrum.com Maureen and use code Maureen at checkout. That's 25% off when you use code Maureen. Cowboy colostrum.com Maureen and after you purchase, they're going to ask you where you heard about them. Please support our show. Tell them you're a troublemaker and the Nerve sent you.
- [04:26]
Mel Robbins was on Real Time with Bill Maher last week. And you know, she sat there in her black eyeglass frames looking like she's like, she's half like art teacher, half like, you know, the cool therapist in town. And she's really just totally full of shit. And it was amazing because Bill Maher started off by saying, oh my God, I can't believe you did my show. Everybody wants Mel Robbins on their show and you came on my show and I can't believe it. And I kind of wonder if Bill is trying to like, you know, clean up his house a little bit with all those skeezy sleazy interviews he does with women on Club Random, Barbara Eden number one. And again, we're gonna be addressing it on the Nerve Awards in a few weeks. Not to worry. So I kind of cause like Bill pretty quickly caught like, even Bill was like, I can't fucking do this. I can't pretend that this woman is actually smart. Or this theory that she's been hawking called the let them theory, which is this, like blockbuster book that, you know.
- [05:35]
The whole premise of her theory is just people are gonna do what they wanna do to you, so let them. Which, you know, again, you could go back to the original nerve we did where I sort of took that entire theory and burnt it to the ground. Metaphorically. I'm not, I'm nowhere near the arsonist that Ryan Reynolds is. But, you know, we're a baby show anyway, so let's begin. Let's begin with Bill a few minutes into this, this interview, pushing back a bit on the let them theory being applicable to just about everything in one's life. Here we go. But not everything is a let them case, right? Everything is if you're being sexually harassed at the office. That's not, that's a let them. Okay, well, here's what it is. Let them do it. Well, no, because they've already done it. So when you say let them, you're not allowing it. You're forcing yourself to recognize the situation you're in. Oh, okay. So let them. As Bill astutely points out, and it's not that big of an intellectual leap. You're just supposed to let anybody do anything they want to you, whether it's sexually harassing you or assaulting you, mugging you, betraying you, spreading lies about you. You're just supposed to let people do something. Now Mel realizes that she's been backed into a corner. Of course that doesn't work. That makes no fucking sense whatsoever. So then Mel says, no, actually what let them now means is that it allows you something catastrophic such as that would allow you to stop gaslighting yourself. But who says anybody's gaslighting themselves? Like, she's, she, she, she, she, she's not, she's not very bright. Okay, now Mel is going to tell us.
- [07:20]
How to deal when, if and when, God forbid. And again, she's in the lion's den with Bill Maher, with William Marr. What do you should do if you're getting sexually harassed? Here we go. And that you're not going to change what's happening by trying to change them. You have to take the power and go, okay, well, let me recognize this is a situation I'm in. Let me stop gaslighting myself and making excuses and like sticking around and beating myself up. And let me remind myself that I struggling to choose what I do next. Am I going to hr? Am I leaving this job? Am I hiring an attorney, all of the energy that you're spending complaining about it, worrying about it, beating yourself up, telling yourself there's nothing you can do. There's always something you can do. Okay? So that is the exact opposite of let them. And trust me, I read that book. It was painful. It was a quick read, and it was painful. And again, her premise is, listen, you can't change other people. You can't change what they're going to do, so you just kind of got to let them. You just got to kind of surf that wave all the way into shore. And then when Bill has pushed back on her, she's. She's. She's really scrambling. She's like, well, no, I mean, then what you do is. What it allows you to do is like, well, you don't. Like, you got to stop. Stop gaslighting yourself. And then you say to yourself, what are you going to do? But it frees you from worrying about it and, like, thinking about what you're going to do. But if you're going to sue somebody or go to HR or bring criminal charges, you're obviously worrying and thinking about it. And it would be normal to worry and think about going up against your boss, who perhaps has sexually harassed you. Now, I don't understand how she can legitimately sit here and peddle her bullshit to people like this. Okay? Oh, now, there's always something you can do. So now we're active. Like, we're active agents in our own life, and we're going to figure out if we're gonna stay. Like, what the fuck is she talking about? Really? Okay. Bill.
- [09:22]
Now says that based on this current answer that she has given him, that her book and her theory sound more like stop them. Like. Like actually do something. Let's see what Mel has to say to this. But that would be more like, stop them. Yes, well, there are. Sometimes let them meet. Has to be stopped them. No, of course, in situations where it's dangerous or discriminatory or somebody's getting hurt, of course you step in and stop them. If that's your values.
- [09:53]
If that's your values. If somebody aggresses you to the point where they violated you, if that. If those are your values, then you should. You know, there are some empirical truths in life, okay? And when people violate you, the only empirical truth is make them suffer for it. Whether you're pressing criminal charges or you're. You're doing a lawsuit, whatever it is, like, you're not gonna just sit there and take it. But again, that runs counter To Mel Robbins entirely. Things now, Bill, you can tell he's getting annoyed with her. You can tell and I'll tell you why. Because he and his team, unlike a lot of other recidivists in the culture, actually do their homework. And you know, we're going to get to this on the mini on Saturday because there's another person who thinks they know everything and doesn't do the homework. Bill at least does the reading or his team does the reading. And he starts by mentioning, well, Mel, like, it's amazing you even got here to this point in your life. You know why? Because you were in a ton of debt. Like Mel Robbins, if I recall correctly. I mean, she was in debt to the astronomical fee. Again, just my recollection of like $800,000. How somebody in America gets into $800,000 worth of debt is beyond me. She had many, many failed businesses and ideas before she hit on this bullshit let them thing, which I believe she's swiped from somebody else. Okay? And her husband, like, I think they almost got divorced at one point. And she also was a big day drinker. So this is when I, these are the times I do appreciate Bill Maher. You know, that that little imp in him comes out and like starts shiving people. Take a look and watch as Mel tries to deflect this because you could tell Bill has really hit a nerve. Here we go. Well, I mean, you, I mean your life was the hard way. I mean you, I mean you came from places that most people haven't been. Deep in debt, drinking, day drinking. Well, wasn't that what you're doing today?
- [12:08]
Not drinking? And I don't. People think I smoke before the show. I, I don't smoke right before the show.
- [12:17]
No. Bill masturbates right before the show. Let's get it straight. Okay, now let's listen to Mel again. She got out of this debt. How, how she got out of it, I know not, but I'm telling you, her empire is built on like a house of cards. This is not a bright woman. She's not smart. She's a hustler. She's clever enough to have taken a bunch of money from a bunch of people who, you know, are vulnerable, I would say vulnerable, and are looking for, you know, simple answers to navigate life, which is just a difficult thing to navigate. It's built in. It's a feature, not a bug. Okay, so let's listen to Mel tell us about how. Oh, this is one of my favorite things that self help people do. It's one of my favorite fucking things. See if you can catch it. Okay? How to take responsibility for your own life.
- [13:10]
You're not a victim here. You're in control of what you do in response. And if you look at. This is how you take responsibility for your life. This is how you change things for the better. And responsibility, though, is the ability to respond. That's what that word means.
- [13:27]
That is not what that word means. Okay, but that's the thing that these people do, these charlatans, they'll like, take a word. Excuse me again, so worked up, Hit the microphone. They take a word and they break it apart. And then they're like response and ability. And so what responsibility means. Mel says literally, responsibility means that you have the ability to respond.
- [13:56]
That is not what the word responsibility means, Mel. But would we expect her to really know what it means? Because I don't think she's a very responsible person. I think the only thing. Thing that really motivates this woman is hustling people for everything she can get that she has, like, one of the top rated podcasts. Like, the mind reels. Truly. Okay, now, you know, Bill kind of gets her into this. I think this was one of the most interesting parts of the exchange because we just. We get a glimpse at how, like, completely uninformed, just completely. I'm not taking advice from people who are this ill informed. I'm sorry, here's Mel. You know, she's having trouble letting a certain United States president do something. She's having trouble with her own. Let them theory. Here we go. Every year at Thanksgiving, I have to do basically the same theme, which is telling people, don't cut off your family. No, it's just terrible. And you know, and I said this a few weeks, a few months ago with. We did an editorial here on the show where I talked about Trump and the fact that there are things that really still I am very adamant about and I will never stop talking about. There are other things where I just. It's like in meditation where they say, just let the cloud pass, you know, like, I see so many people are upset about him building a ballroom. I could give a. I don't give a. Well, I. Because we're paying for it. But, Mel, I thought you're just supposed to let them. First of all, Trump is in the White House whether you voted for him or not. We are where we are, and he's building a ballroom. And if Mel was truly an adherent to the advice that she pushes for kicks and for profit, she would be like, you Know what? Let him. Let him. I'm on the Earth for the blink of an eye, and the White House is always undergoing renovations, and there's nothing I can do about it. And it really doesn't directly impact my life, except she says with full conviction, oh, you know why I give a fuck about it? Because we're paying for it. No, we are not. Here we go. No, we're not. No, we're not paying for it. It's private. First of all, even if we did, well, it's already bulldozed, so anytime burning up about it, it's already happened. Oh, okay. So now Mel tried to just completely contradict the outburst she just had where she said, I give a real f it. You know, we're paying for it. I don't like it. She didn't say, I don't like it. But that was in there. You know, it was baked into the answer. And then Bill's like, well, no, we're not. It's being privately funded. And then she's like, oh, well, then, you know, I mean, I like. You can't burn up about it because you can't do anything about, like, this woman is all over the place. And she is a direct descendant of Oprah, who we are going to get to, because all this shit that they're talking about, you know.
- [16:58]
They touched on it a little bit with, like, you know, don't. Don't cut off your family of origin. You know, this is this thing really. I believe this. This dates back to the election of 2016. So we've been living with it for nearly 10 years, and it's becoming normalized, and it's really, really. It's a danger in the culture. I don't like it one bit. Now, before we get to that, Bill again, I think he's trying to do his penance here because, you know, listen, there's one thing Bill really has true contempt for, and that's stupidity. And when he's got people on his panel who you can tell he thinks are dim bulbs, he can barely hide it. He roll. You know, my favorite thing he does, which is.
- [17:41]
You know, he doesn't even try to hide it. This woman's a. And he's trying to help her out. Still. Here we go. But I still do think you have to choose your battles. You have to pick what you get. Yes. So if this were the dining room table and you're saying something that pisses me off. Right. And not. I'm not suggesting that that pisses me off, but you're At a dining room table with your family, you get to choose how much energy that opinion takes up. Up here, you get to choose whether or not you allow it to burn you up inside. You get to choose whether or not you're going to engage. And so what I love about Let Them and Let Me is all day long, you have this slice and dice that you can do where you force yourself and allow yourself to recognize what's in your control and what's not. And when it comes to opinions and families, I agree with you. The thing that's separating us is our inability to sit with each other and allow each other the dignity of their own ex. Their own experience and opinion. Right. Even if it offends us. Instead of leaning away, we have to learn how to sit with our ups setness and lean toward each other.
- [18:51]
My inner green. There's no such word as upsetness, Mel. It's upset. Okay? This is a number one New York Times bestselling author.
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I weep. I weep. Then she says, okay, really brace yourselves for this. The thing that is separating us is our inability to sit together.
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That's what's called a tautology. I would defy Mel Robbins to spell the word tautology. But it's, you know, when the thing that you say is actually the thing that you say. Yeah. People are separated because they won't sit down together. You gotta be fucking kidding me. Okay, I blame Oprah. I put all of the blame at Oprah's feet. Now, Oprah recently did a special. This aired about, I'm gonna say, nine or ten days ago, right before Thanksgiving, she recorded this in New York City with a live audience. You know who wasn't there? Stedman Graham. Marlene is going to have to clue me in on today, what day it is like in our. In our ongoing countdown of how much time has elapsed since we sent that email to Stedman Graham asking him if he was okay and in fact, still alive. But anyway, so she does this thing, and it's racked up, like, over 4 million views already on YouTube. So, you know, again, she's hitting a nerve. Right? The title of this episode, Oprah explores the rising trend of going, no contact with your family. This is like your family of origin.
- [20:26]
Beginning to begin. She cited a recent Cornell University study which finds that one third of Americans are currently going, no contact. This means you have abs. Like, no texting, no voice memos, no emails, nothing. Okay? These people are dead to you. Now Oprah goes around the room, introducing people who have adopted this concept. Here we go. Bristol, go ahead. I have been no contact with my entire family for a year and a half now. No contact. No contact. Not a phone call, not a text, not a nothing. Nothing for a year and a half now. Okay. Chris, how about you? It's been four years since I've had contact with my parents and my siblings. Four years. Not a word. Not a word. Okay. And Kendall, I've been no contact with my 30 year old son for 2 years. By your choice? By choice.
- [21:26]
These people look like cult members. They all. The first one, especially that woman, Crystal. She look, she looks like deranged. She's like. Yeah, I've been no contacts for quite a while now. I love it. Like, it reads like an SNL skit. Like back, you know, when SNL was actually funny. Now Oprah says that she doesn't have an opinion on whether people. I've got multiple opinions, okay? I think we all have opinions on this, okay? But of course she doesn't have an opinion. She helped Meghan Markle further excise any communication that her husband ever hoped to have with his family of origin. She sat there and she. You listen to Meghan Markle. My opinion, and I could back it up with facts, but I'm just going to say my opinion. Shove a bunch of lies out to the Western world about how racist and awful the Royal Family was to her. Meghan Markle, who you know, that's Oprah. Oprah, She's a fucking dark person. And I apologize to our Australian troublemakers because I know she's down there right now befouling your beautiful country. Now she introduces an expert. This is Dr. Joshua Coleman, who is the author of a book. Oh, my God, this book. You know the phrase Rules of Engagement? His book is called Rules of Estrangement. Here we go. If you line up and you're an estranged parent, you're gonna get onto a Facebook site, or if you're an estranged adult child, you're gonna probably get onto Reddit or something like that and you're gonna get support for your perspective. But these aren't people who actually know your parents or know your adult child. They're going to kind of tell you what you want to hear. So there's this very inflammatory reaction that people have as a result of it. And partly that happens because we've become so, so divided as a society. People are kind of looking for their tribes.
- [23:17]
You know, he's totally right about that. And I, I could not watch this entire thing. I just couldn't do it. It just wasn't deep enough or nuanced enough or thoughtful enough. And, you know, I'm sorry again, whether you voted for the guy or not, we're apolitical here at the Nerve, but it's Trump, okay? It all began with Trump. It all began with Trump. Now, Oprah, as someone who has talked to people for decades, and again, I pay homage to those of you troublemakers who very early on in this show's genesis, emailed tons of you, and you were like, yeah, you know what? I went to the Oprah show back in the day. She didn't talk to any of us. She barely even looked at us when, like, the cameras went down. We were on break. You know what? She had, she had some lackey come. She would come on the show. She would come on the set, like, barefoot, in her hose, whatever, and then someone would like, actually put her shoes on as she sat down. She sat in a chair. You know, it was, it was augering things to come for Gail. Last seen tying Oprah's shoelaces. No, she was last seen giving a presser to TMZ outside of the CBS offices saying that she, despite published well sourced reports that CBS is gonna cut her loose. That CBS fucking loves her. Anyway, Oprah weighs in on this. Okay, let's listen to Oprah. You know, I've been talking to people for a number of years, and I remember back in the day, meaning 80s, 90s, the aughts, the very idea of having a disagreement with your family and the very idea of divorcing your parent or removing yourself from a toxic situation was a foreign concept to people. But now it's like common understanding.
- [24:58]
It was not a foreign concept. I mean, first of all, we could just ask Stedman about divorcing yourself from people, just disappearing intimate figures in your life, just disappearing them. We could ask Stedman if we knew where the fuck he was. Stedman, call us, shoot us an email. DM me. I say I give my info Every. Every nerve. We're here, okay? We're here. Now that is not a foreign concept. And it's been, it's been in the culture basically since, like, pop psychology has ever been a thing. If you come from a family where you have been abused, okay? Where you have been sexually abused, physically abused, where you know you have real cause to divorce yourself, of course, that is actually a healthy thing, but. But this doctor says any other reason is really ridiculous, okay? And he calls it, and I love this, a quote, virtuous act of protecting your mental health. It's all about being like Virtue signaling, like, look, I'm, I'm just, I'm so. I have such purity of heart and values that I could never associate with somebody who thinks differently than I do. You know, it's actually the opposite of virtuous. Now we are going to hear from another guest of Oprah's. This is Dr. Lindsay C. Gibson, and she is the author of a very famous book called Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents. And she does again, something I love, by which I mean loathe. It's somebody who gets the money and fame that they've clearly been looking for their entire life based on a very snappily titled project. It can be a book, it can be whatever, and then they disavow it because they think it makes them look low brow. Let's listen to Dr. Gibson. Well, how do you talk to them about your emotionally immature parent? And how do you determine whether a parent is emotionally immature? Yeah, I really stay away from those terms in psychotherapy because I'm not sure she wrote a whole book about it. I did write the book. I did write the book.
- [27:11]
That's one of the only times I'm gonna agree with Oprah. Oprah's like, come on lady, you wrote the book about it. You injected those words into the le and frankly, I think they're appropriate words. You know, there are plenty of adults walking around parents who are emotionally immature, who never matured. Their Hollywood is littered with them. Okay, now this is one of my favorites. Okay, we're going to hear from a, from a person who's done it. Chris, who we met at the top of this little segment. Chris, who has had no contact with his parents or siblings for four years. Okay, he's going to tell us why you guys are going to die. Here we go. So I grew up in a very performance oriented household. It was attend an Ivy League school, get the money, the power, the status. Be someone that we can feel proud of.
- [28:11]
Okay, so Chris by his own account is, has gone no contact with his family of origin for four years. For putting him through an Ivy League school, for making sure he got into one that takes a lot of money and a lot of time, for telling him, you know what, we want you to be successful, we want you to get money and to, and to have a job that you love, a career and you know, we want the best for you. And he went no contact because I guess he, in his mind he thinks that stuff is abusive. You know, talk to somebody who grew up in a house full of like benign neglect. Talk to Somebody who grew up, like, without. Without one parent in the home and had another parent who was, like, working two jobs and, you know, didn't have time to tutor them through whatever or make sure they played baseball. He looks like he was a pitcher at Princeton. Get the fuck out. Okay, now. Now, his wife is named Bree, and Bree spells her name B R E. So, you know, she's trouble. You know, she's already a lot of work. Chris says another part of the problem is that his parents didn't really like Bri. Here we go. So when Bri and I first got together, we very much felt like she was. My parents were apathetic towards her. They were not super interested in getting to know her, and they didn't like her. Yeah, yeah. That's the feeling that we got. That's the short answer. That's the feeling. Okay. They didn't like her. Yeah. And the way that. That really surfaced was what we perceived as a disinterest in getting to genuinely know her. Yeah. And for, you know, when we started dating, so be it. But as it became clear that this was a real relationship, that this was an intention, that we were in love, and I said, this is the woman I'm gonna marry. And as we moved into that more serious realm, it went from what we perceived as apathy to more of, we don't like this. And the way that that took form for us was my parents, we found, through friends, were scheduling lunches to have conversation with my friends where the topic was were worried about Chris. That was the first thing. And then it became, can we delay this engagement or can we ask him? Your friends? Yes. Or can. And can we take this marriage off the table? Okay, I have a question, which is, did any of Chris's friends say to his parents, you're fucking crazy? We're not doing that, because that is not in Chris's self report, which makes me think that his friends were on board with the idea of. Of slowing this courtship, nay, imminent marriage down. Okay, what if Bri is a problem? What if Bri is like a Meghan Markle? You know, I. If you're going to do a show like this. And I was saying to Marlena, back in the day, when Oprah had her, like, actual talk show, her nationally syndicated talk show, she had such a great team working for her, and her producers would have made sure that if they were doing a segment like this to have the parents on, to have the siblings on, to have the friends on, to get everybody's version of the story, because it's like Rashomon. And I think these two just seem like assholes. They seem like really smug, spoiled, well bred, well fed assholes. Okay, Now Chris and Bri are worried because, you know, Bree doesn't speak to her family either.
- [31:49]
And you know, it is giving Harry and Meghan it really kind of is. You know, Megan's father is in intensive care right now in the Philippines. And Meghan's most concerned with her fucking holiday Netflix special about family.
- [32:09]
So.
- [32:12]
They'Re concerned a little bit, like. Cause they want to know how their kids are going to understand.
- [32:21]
What it is to have grandparents, even though.
- [32:25]
By their decision making, their children are not going to have access to their grandparents. So Oprah turns to another expert, a woman named Nedra Glover Tawab, author of a book called no Drama. And Nedra.
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She'S not really with these two. Here we go. Nedra, is it a tragedy if as a grandchild, their children are 2 and 4, you never even knew your grandparents? Yes. But they will still have some idea of what a grandparent is. And I think for you two, it'll be very important in an age appropriate way to explain the situation. What? First of all, apologies. I mispronounced Nedra's name. It's obviously Nedra. So she says, a, it's a tragedy that. That her ch. That their children won't know their grandparents and vice versa, but that it's okay because they will still have a concept of what it is to have grandparents.
- [33:24]
No, lady, no way. I want to know her credentials. They're little kids. They're not going to have a concept of having grandparents because they don't have grandparents. They're going to see all their friends, though, having grandparents at their major life events and their graduations from kindergarten and all this the grandparents live for. Okay? And then she says, well, it's gonna be okay because you're gonna explain to them in an age appropriate way. It's not even about not having grandparents. They don't have aunts, they don't have uncles, they don't have cousins. These are destroyers. Okay? There is. This is again, a huge reason that the nerve exists. There is a lot of destruction going on in the culture and there are a lot of destroyers among us who are acting as though they are agents of good and they are not. This is all fucking bullshit. And Oprah seems just a little too cool with it. Okay? But again, as we said, we have no idea where Steadman's remains are, so.
- [34:18]
Okay, coming up, a celebrity. Oh, my God. Just a juicy, fun, well needed celebrity Roundup plus your feedback. We are back in a minute.
- [34:35]
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- [36:46]
We are back and we have many, many offender updates for you. No one's on parole this week at the Nerve. Everyone's behind bars awaiting arraignment. Okay, first, Prince Harry went on Stephen Colbert as a surprise guest on Wednesday night. And again, this is fascinating to me, because these two are both losers and they think that they're winning.
- [37:16]
Let's look at him doing this bit that you know is like popular on Instagram. Like this back forth, back forth, back forth. And you can tell they're both just so pleased with themselves. Here we go. If you was treated like a king for the day, what would you want me to do for you? Beck? For me, probably. You'd want me to do what? Beg. Beg. Beck. B, A K. Beck. Bake. Oh, Bake.
- [37:53]
You know.
- [37:56]
He went from second in line to the throne to basically like an on call sidekick for a guy who completely destroyed the late night franchise. So I guess, well done, Harry again, another destroyer. Another destroyer. This happened against the backdrop of William and Catherine, Princess of Wales.
- [38:26]
Hosting a state dinner.
- [38:30]
And releasing what will be, it looks like their Christmas card. And these two could not look more royal and adult. And, you know, that's something that Meghan and Harry just will never achieve. They will never accomplish it. They're children. Talk about emotionally immature. Is that our theme for the episode? Those two are so emotionally immature and Harry is so determined to prove that he's just the same fun loving, whimsical prince that we all knew and he's just.
- [39:03]
Okay. Now. Gayle King.
- [39:07]
Oprah's permanent plus one.
- [39:11]
Talked again about rumors of her demise at CBS. And she gave this little interview while attending.
- [39:23]
The 2025 Footwear News Achievement Awards. Here she is talking to my colleague over at the Daily Mail. Is there anything you could say about cbs, your future on it, or anything you could address? No. What do you know?
- [39:42]
I'm still there. I'm planning to be there.
- [39:47]
She says, what do you know? And she laughs. But she really kind of means that you can tell. And then she's walking away. She's like, like. And her voice is getting smaller and smaller. It's all like. It tracks. I'm still there. I'm planning to be there. I don't think so. I don't think so. We have a new wig. It's without bangs and it seems to be streaked with magenta. And I don't understand.
- [40:13]
I don't understand her. Look at all. At all. She's got these deep bags under her eyes. They're kind of Alec Baldwin adjacent. Like, she looks like she's not getting a lot of sleep. I think these rumors are keeping her up at night. I do. Okay, next, Michelle Obama on Jamie Kern Lima. This found its way into my algorithm. Algorithm. Do you hate me or do you love me? Sometimes I can't tell.
- [40:39]
Jamie Kern Lima asked Michelle Obama how she got so cool. And Michelle, instead of laughing it off or being like, what are you talking about? I'm a former first lady, I'm in my 60s, you know, I'm trying to do something substantive with my life, if only. Instead, she was like, great question. Let me tell you how I got so cool. Here we go. How did you learn to be so cool?
- [41:06]
I think I was born with it. No, how did I learn. That's so. That's so, so cute. I think it's a culmination. This is the beauty of this interesting life. You know, I grew up as a working class kid on the south side. So many influences, so much. You know, that's the beauty of our diversity, right? It's like just so many different experiences that I draw from. Music, culture, people, language, travel. I think the more. The more of.
- [41:39]
Creates that cool, right? Because you're constantly. I'm constantly borrowing from other people's cool. Okay, okay. And Jamie Kern Lima, you know, as Michelle is waxing on about how she got to just be so amazing. I mean, why should I be surprised? Her entire book is, like, lit how beautiful I am. Okay?
- [42:03]
Jamie Kern Lima is sitting there and she's like.
- [42:09]
She, she. She's got this expression on her face. You know, she's. It's supposed to be like Buddha, like. And like, I'm just. I'm so centered and I'm just receiving everything you have to say. And really, it looks like she is straining as she's inhaling like, some noxious fumes. You know, just. It's. You know, that that is actually a true meaning of the minds, by which I mean they're both fucking insufferable morons. Okay? Now, Jennifer Aniston. Jennifer Aniston spotted in New York City this week. Now, you know her new boyfriend is a celebrity hypnotist. You can access his stuff online as well. We've talked about him. Now, the thing about Jim Curtis, her hypnotist boyfriend, is that he's got some sort of physical impairment that requires him to use a cane. Like one of his legs.
- [43:08]
It seems almost like it's permanently torqued. And you gotta look at this image. You gotta look at it because. Jennifer, Jennifer Aniston. Oh, sorry, we can't show it, but you can find it online. They're exiting, like, a fancy restaurant in New York. Like, it's called Cafe Clooney. It's like, you know, it's a celebrity's hotspot, whatever, and she goes out the door first because I guess he's a gentleman and he lets her out the door first. And she just keeps going. Like she doesn't hold the door open for her hypnotist boyfriend who was struggling to exit the restaurant. It's like 30 degrees out here right now. It's fucking cold. The guy's got a cane. He's only got one arm. She just lets it slam in his face. I, you know, I know Marlena loves Jennifer Aniston. I think Jennifer Aniston's an asshole. I do. Now, another Friends related story. Matthew Perry.
- [44:05]
It broke this week on Wednesday that the doctor who supplied Matthew Perry with ketamine. Ketamine. Is that how you say it? Has been sentenced to 30 months in prison, which I guess is about two and a half years. And I'm really torn about this. I'm really, really torn because Matthew Perry was a very, very wealthy, very famous guy who was going to get whatever he wanted. And I just don't know that.
- [44:33]
I'm torn. Like, yeah, the doctor was peddling. Yeah, I guess I think he should go to prison, right? Like, why should there be two tiers of justice, right? You want, like, drug pushers on whatever level, except if you are big pharma and you're pushing Ozempic or any number of GLP1s that are causing people everything from blindness to suicidal ideations to losing organs. But, you know, what do I know? Okay? Now Apple Martin has some Nepo baby competition. And this is already a category for the Nerve Awards. The competition is tight. Here comes Madonna's son, Rocco Richie, in a new ad for Armani, who would have died if he hadn't just died over. I don't. I don't think Armani would have countenanced this. Countenanced this. Excuse me for a moment. Let's take a look at Rocco's Giorgio Armani ad.
- [45:33]
I think elegance is being honest. And the art, you know, the painter fades, but the work stays. And I guess the trick is to embrace both.
- [45:46]
And then the tagline is, that's so Armani. I am sorry. This kid is not a model. He's not. He's very short. He's very squat. We're talking about our visual art. I don't know why we're not seeing the visual art or seeing this kid in the studio. And I can't imagine that that ad is going to inspire any man to go buy an article of Armani clothing because there is nothing aspirational about a squat, sad failure of an EPO kid. Okay? Just my opinion. Now JLO is back out on these streets slinging her badge around to anyone who will pay $12 and 50 cents to see it. Here we go. This was posted on her Instagram on December 2nd. And she's just gyrating. And, you know, it's like. It's very.
- [46:40]
It's sad. It's sad. At 56 years old, your life. You should have. You should have built your life in such a way that things of greater substance animate you than proving that you're still effable. You know, I don't know how much this has to do with Ben Affleck, you know, dumping her. I really don't. But it's. It's a very. This is not empowering. Okay?
- [47:10]
Then she popped up at the Hollywood Reporters Women in Entertainment gala. She's on. It's on YouTube if you want to see it. Talking. She's crying. She's talking about how she only ever wanted to show up for underrepresented groups. Since when? Since when? JLO has only ever always been about JLo, okay? She's just happy. She skated through the entire Sean Combs federal trial. Let's get real. Here she is on the carpet at the Hollywood Reporters Women in Entertainment gala. Here we go.
- [47:45]
Now, on to your feedback. Hi, Maureen. Love your producer, Marlena. We all do here at the Nerve, but you know who tries too hard to be cool and is decidedly not cool, per our discussion on the most recent nerve? William Bill Maher. Marlena is so cool, she would probably sneak into the woodshed to meet up with him. We're going to put a tracker on Marlena, okay? It just has to be done. Hello, Maureen. Ha ha ha. It's Paul from New Zealand. Resident house artist Oprah, he writes, is coming to New Zealand. I expect to run into Andy Kiwi and Michael From New Zealand, two of the most active troublemakers on the YouTube. Chats from New Zealand at our very small airport to join them in tossing nerve rotten eggs at Oprah. Thank you. Thank you. New artwork is on the way. Thank you, Paul. Hi, Maureen, retired Mo Bro expat writing to you from Phnom Penh, Cambodia. Whoa. I love the show and never miss it on YouTube. Check out this meme I saw on Facebook this morning. I had to send it along because it is so apropos. This is troublemaker Mark, who sent us Art of a Wood Chipper with the writing. Some things are unacceptable. Get in the wood chipper. Yes. The Nerve continues to make an imprint on the culture. Now, before we go any further, quick reminder. Keep your feedback coming. Email me at maureenevilmaycaremedia.com or DM me on Instagram at Maureen Callahan, writer or at the Nerve show. Remember to subscribe to the nerve substack nerveshow.com also also very exciting news. Our holiday merch has dropped. Go to shopthenerv.com or just go to thenerveshow.com you will find it. We've got stuff for everybody. We've got Christmas ornaments. We've got a puzzle. We've got stuff for the Mo Bros. We've got beer cozies. We've got skull caps. What are you doing? Go on over there before everything goes. Okay, next up.
- [50:09]
How will I put this? Someone is shrinking and not in the way she thinks. Okay, see you in a minute.
- [50:18]
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- [52:27]
We are back now to our incredibly shrinking dealer celebrity. We're going to talk about Amy Schumer.
- [52:37]
Who has been going crazy on Instagram since she began taking a GLP1 and shed a good amount of weight, but not all of it. And this is a salient point because we're really going to talk about the truth going on here. Okay? She is posting images of herself, I believe, heavily, heavily airbrushed. She has not lost the amount of weight she would have you believe while posing on that filthy brown carpeted staircase. Just my opinion. While who knows who's taking care of her son. Okay? Now she posted something on Instagram the other night and like Team Nerve was immediately activated. It was like a bat signal went up. We were all like, holy shit, are you seeing this? And then of course, I knew it. I knew she was gonna delete it. But we grabbed it. We grabbed it. And I'm going to read from it. And we should be able to show like a full screen of it. But this is basically what it looks like. And if you, if you can't tell, like underneath all of this type, this crazy person type is a shot of Amy lolling about in bed. I'm sorry, it looks like it's daytime, okay? It looks like it's daytime. This is not a well woman. She's out here telling us that she's never been better.
- [53:59]
This is not a well woman. I'm going to read from this Instagram post, okay? And let me just tell you, there is type going vertically, horizontally, every which way. You know what this reminds me of? It reminds me of the moment in seven when Brad Pitt and Morgan Freeman get into Kevin Spacey's apartment. They only know he's the killer. They don't know it's Kevin Spacey yet. And they find the notebooks and they're like full of tiny, tiny, tiny. That's what this is. Okay, now I'm going to read from it. Bedroom tour by Jean. This is her six year old son.
- [54:37]
I never ever wear jewelry. I don't there. Also there's no punctuation. So you know, our inner grammarians are also activated. I never ever wear jewelry. I Don't get Botox or filler. She spelled it filer. F I, L, E, R. I didn't lose 30 pounds. I lost 50. We'll see, Amy, okay? We're gonna see. Because you're trying to make women who are still where you used to be, like really overweight, really struggling. You're trying to make them feel like shit about themselves. Okay? You got on the other side of the aisle, or so you think. And now you like it. You like it in the VIP club. You're a fucking hypocrite. Okay, okay. She says again, I lost 50 pounds, not 30. She goes on to claim not to look hot. Okay. Okay. Not to look hot. Which does feel fun and temporary. I did it to survive. I had a disease that makes your face extremely puffy, that can kill you.
- [55:36]
But the Internet caught it and that disease has cleared. Sorry for whatever feeling it's giving you that I lost that weight. I've had plastic surgery over the years and I use Mounjaro. Not capitalized. That is a name brand and it should be capitalized. Sorry to anyone. They what? They sorry to anyone, they let lets down. I'm pain free. I can. Okay, tag with my son. I think she means play whatever ends up happening with me and Chris. That's the husband she's about to dump. He's a star. Anyway, just my opinion has nothing to do with weight loss or autism. I don't think he's an aut. Autistic guy as stated before on the nerve. I think he's just an asshole. Fingers crossed we make it through. He's the best.
- [56:29]
Happy to share more. If anyone has any questions about how I'm looking or feeling or where I am in my perimenopause process. Lena Dunham would like a word. She is the oversharer of our era. Nay, of her generation. Is she not? Like I. I think that post was made very clearly while Amy was under the influence of drugs and or alcohol. Okay. I do. That is just my opinion. It is rambling. It is more self obsessed than the average celebrity. We are perseverating on our weight, our weight loss, how we look. We are feeling hot. We are feeling ourselves. Okay? She is posting images of herself on Instagram on that staircase. That staircase, which I just. It should be demolished. It looks filthy. Okay. But the staircase is apparently where we're living now. We're not moving from the staircase because that's where we're posting images of ourself in like mini dresses so we can show off our legs and we're also leaning back a lot so that, like, our face looks super tight. I think these images are all highly manipulated, okay? Because we're going to show this image. I saw this, and I died. I was like, this is the real Amy Schumer. I think this ran in the New York Post this week. She's walking down the street and it was taken, it looks like, by a paparazzo. And she's got a fair amount of weight on her still. She really does. You know, those drugs, they only do so much. Unless you're, like, one of the people who. It seems like Kelly Osborne is having this reaction where, like, she cannot stop losing weight and looks gaunt. Like, Kelly Osborne is still a fairly young woman, and she looks like she has a terminal illness. And I'm so sick of these celebrities shoving this stuff in our faces like it's normal and everybody should be doing it. It's extremely dangerous. And then Amy is out here saying, you know, she lost the weight because she had to save her life. This was her in People magazine. Again, it's quoting. I don't know if she's repeating herself on Instagram that she had to lose the weight. She had to lose the weight because she had a disease that was threatening her very life, okay? Her very life. Now, what she's talking about is Cushing syndrome, okay? Cushing syndrome. If you haven't heard of it, probably you haven't, because it's very rare. It's a hormonal disorder, and it's caused by prolonged exposure to high levels of the stress hormone cortisol. Common cortisol. Cortisol, whatever. Common symptom symptoms include upper body weight gain, you get thin limbs, you get a moon face. Amy's face. Yeah, that describes it. Ooh. You can get, like, a fatty hump between the shoulders. Thin, fragile skin that bruises easily. Stretch marks, you know, can cause a bunch. Okay? Now, in 2024, Amy told. I don't know why People was, like, she was promoting some shows I think, that nobody's watched. Again, her trajectory is very much like Lena Dunham's. And I'm going to tell you why. These are not likable people.
- [59:56]
They're also, I believe, fabricators, okay? They love being sick. They love being victims. They were champions of the quote unquote, body positivity movement. I mean, if anyone should. I will. I will say in all seriousness, if anyone should be on, like, a GLP one, it's Lena Dunham. She has made herself morbidly obese and the comorbidities that are going to result from that are so serious that she should lose weight by whatever means necessary. It still doesn't make her likable. Amy Schumer told people magazine in 2024 that she found out that her form of Cushing would, quote, work itself out. And she was very relieved. But now it was a fatal. A potentially fatal disease that she had to take a GLP one for.
- [60:54]
What? What? Okay, so, you know, Marlena and I were talking. I said, let's go back a little further. Let's go back a little further. Because she used to love to talk about this shit. Okay? In 2015, she was interviewed by 303Magazine.com for her movie Train Wreck question. So I watched you on Ellen recently, and of course, in the movie, you're always talking about your body and making fun of yourself, but how do you empower yourself to go up against all of that? Amy?
- [61:24]
I just. I think. Excuse me. I think I just have a good sense of knowing that it's kind of just pounded into our heads that we're all supposed to look like this and this is right and everything else is wrong, and only, like, two people actually look like that, and they're not even happy. So rather than me becoming something like that, I'm like, why don't I just start enjoying my life and be healthy and be like, this is it. And some days I wake up and look in the mirror and I'm like, so I'm a monster. But most of the time, I'm like, yeah, I don't want to lose a bunch of weight and then meet a guy and be like, now I have to keep this going on. So this is it. And this is what it's going to be. If they want to cast the most beautiful girl in the movie, that's not me. But rather than trying to be what other people want, I'm just trying to be what I want. And we all know it was a fucking lie, okay? These people. These people don't believe what they're telling you. Don't believe what they're selling. You just come to the Nerve. Come to the nerve for our real talk about fake people. And it sets your head right for the day. I like to think so. I think you guys, too. And that does it. That does it for our Friday edition of the Nerve. But come back and see us tomorrow because our mini is going to address a very big event, a very big story that happened this week that we didn't get to, and we thought we're just going to save it. It's a perfect mini. Perfect mini that will drop on YouTube Saturday morning at 10am Eastern. If you haven't already, check out our substack@thenerveshow.com Tim the makeup Artist is giving some more pro tips over there. Be sure to subscribe if you want to get access to all that good stuff. Plus, we've got again new Merv Merch. New Merv Merch for you so called mo bros. You straight guys with tough jobs who have lots of hot heterosexual sex. We got plenty of merch for you and we got stuff for the holidays. So go grab something for yourself or a fellow troublemaker or troublemaker in training. Go to shopthenerv.com also the nerve is now available on Megan's podcast Playlist every Monday, Wednesday and Friday at 9am Eastern on Sirius XM channel 111, the Megyn Kelly channel. We will see you tomorrow for the Mini and then again next week right here at the Nerve, where you will never guess what we're about to say next.
- [64:00]
While the who's of Whoville laughed and made cheery, the Grinch hatched a plot to make their season more dreary. Dill pickle seasoning on fries, Knitted Argy stockings. That'll sure make for a shocking unboxing the new Grinch meal now at McDonald's as participating McDonald's while supplies last.
- [64:15]
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