Life on High Volume: The Ups and Downs of Hypersensitivity

Summary

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The Neurodivergent Experience

Episode: Life on High Volume: The Ups and Downs of Hypersensitivity
Hosts: Jordan James & Simon Scott
Date: September 10, 2025

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Episode Overview

In this episode, Jordan James and Simon Scott explore the personal, social, and sometimes contradictory realities of hypersensitivity in neurodivergent people. Drawing from their own lived experiences on the autism and ADHD spectrums, the hosts examine sensory challenges (pain, light, sound, touch, smell, and taste) and how these impact daily life, relationships, and self-acceptance. They candidly discuss coping mechanisms, the emotional toll of hypersensitivity, moments of joy it brings, internalized ableism, and the ongoing challenge of advocating for reasonable accommodations in a world calibrated for neurotypical senses. The episode is rich with anecdotes, humor, empathy, and validation for listeners experiencing similar struggles.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Jordan’s Injury and the Intersection of Pain & Hypersensitivity

[Starts 02:00]

• Jordan recounts a severe back injury triggered by helping lift a weight at the gym and details the escalating pain and reduction in mobility.
  • "It started with a twinge... And then when I tried to get up after that, that was when it was like, holy shit, there is so much pain." – Jordan [04:09]
  • Relies on family for basic needs due to immobility, highlighting feelings of "helplessness" and "internal ableism."
• Emotionally vulnerable moment as Jordan describes his children’s varied reactions and his struggle to process this setback.
  • "So many fails. Scared was the number one. And it’s terrifying." – Jordan [07:44]
• The story sets up the episode’s focus: how hypersensitivity amplifies physical and emotional experiences.

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2. What is Hypersensitivity? Shared and Unique Experiences

[13:30]

• Both hosts experience sensory hypersensitivity, but in different ways and across different senses.
  • Simon: "I constantly feel absolutely everything that's happening in my body all at once..." [13:39]
  • Jordan: Describes fluctuations in pain perception—sometimes over-feeling, sometimes under-feeling due to ADHD and autism.
  • Together, they discuss the spectrum nature: one can be hypersensitive in one domain, hyposensitive in another.

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3. Sensory Stories: Sound, Light, Smell, & Touch

[14:55–32:00]

Sound

• Memories of identifying people by their footsteps—an echo of intuitive adaptation.
• Simultaneously, overwhelming noise (e.g., on trains, public places) is disabling.
  • "My hearing is super sensitive... I was hearing conversations in the very large room... And they nicknamed me Satellite." – Jordan [21:06]

Light

• Both regularly wear sunglasses, sometimes even on overcast days due to light sensitivity.
  • "I wore sunglasses when I drove my other half to work this morning, even though it was lashing it down with rain." – Simon [13:40]

Smell

• Simon rarely detects smells, even in places like the fish aisle.
• Jordan describes intense olfactory experiences, from perfumes to nature:
  • "When I was a kid, I used to run through [the perfume section] holding my breath... I could just smell the chemicals." – Jordan [25:36]
  • Post-COVID symptom flare-up: hyperawareness of cleaning products, leading to distress at work.

Touch

• Both get annoyed by small irritants like stones in shoes or sand between toes—described humorously but with genuine distress.
  • "[The Princess and the Pea] story is just, she's autistic... that’s how I feel." – Jordan [32:03]
  • "If I got sand in between my toes, I'm considering removing my foot." – Simon [33:28]

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4. Emotional and Social Consequences

[36:00–55:00]

• Hypersensitivity profoundly shapes social life and relationships:
  • Simon's partner's echolalia (repeating lines from a song) can be both endearing and overwhelming:
    • "She'll sing one line of a song at full volume whether I am a foot away or on the other side of the house." [36:54]
  • Emotional Dysregulation: Feeling out-of-sync with social expectations at events (funerals, concerts, etc).
  • Overwhelm in public spaces: public transport, supermarkets, and crowds—each bring sensory overload.
  • Internalized ableism: shame or embarrassment for self-accommodation, e.g., wearing ear protection in public.
    • "I feel so self-conscious when I do that though. I feel so childish." – Simon [41:39]
    • Jordan’s healthy reframe: "Most of the time no one's looking at you. Like, you are not the star of the show. No one really cares..." [42:32]

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5. Joys and Contradictions: When Hypersensitivity is a Gift

[31:10, 45:30]

• Sensory sensitivity isn’t always negative; it can create moments of awe and connection, e.g., with nature or music:
  • "I'll go into a nice garden and I can smell all the flowers... it's glorious." – Jordan [28:20]
  • Musical 'frisson': Simon describes being emotionally overwhelmed by music, resulting in tears.
    • "I will go and watch a band... and I will have tears rolling down my face because of the overwhelming sensations." – Simon [46:06]
• Contradictions abound: Some painful stimuli are barely noticed; trivial discomforts can be unbearable.

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6. Environment, Accommodations, and Self-Advocacy

[57:31–65:00]

• Both hosts share strategies for thriving as hypersensitive adults:
  • Choosing living environments away from cities/noisy places.
  • Sunglasses for light sensitivity; different pairs for different settings.
  • Noise-cancelling headphones are game-changers for both.
    • "I invested in a really good pair of noise cancelling headphones that has been a game changer for me. I take them everywhere..." – Simon [65:16]
• Recognition that accommodations are highly individual and even change day-to-day.
• The emotional work of asking partners and family for accommodation—challenge and necessity.

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7. Hypersensitivity in Public and Communal Spaces

[69:00–77:00]

• Tensions arise between personal needs and communal expectations (cinemas, theater, concerts).
  • How to reconcile when one person’s accommodation is another’s trigger?
  • Thoughtful but frank debate about reasonable expectation (e.g., children at adult movies, adults in kid movies).
    • "There are special showings for autistic people... but also, others have the right to enjoy in peace." – Jordan [71:07]
  • Simon reflects on the internal conflict of being triggered by others’ neurodivergent traits:
    • "Then I feel like we're just top trumping each other, going, well, I have this. So you have that..." [72:42]

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8. Acceptance, Humor, and the Ongoing Journey

[78:38–end]

• Humor as a coping mechanism and a tool for community:
  • "If you don't laugh, you cry. And humor is healing..." – Jordan [78:38]
• The importance of accepting both the disabling and the magical aspects of hypersensitivity.
  • "Risk versus reward... adjusting your life as best you can and accepting that disability, accepting that side of the coin..." – Jordan [78:38]
• Nature as refuge, technology as an aid, and community as comfort.

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Notable Quotes & Time Stamps

• On hypersensitivity’s complexity:
  "It's two sides of the same coin... It can be wonderful in some situations, and it can be completely disabling in others." – Jordan [31:10, 51:04]

• On pain perception:
  "Pain is your body saying stop, that something's wrong. The warning system, it's just a warning system... And if it doesn't come on, then I'm just going to keep driving." – Jordan [18:23]

• On self-advocacy and shame:
  "Most of the time no one's looking at you... you are not the star of the show... and if somebody does, they're a dick, so why do you care?" – Jordan [42:32]

• On music's emotional power:
  "I'll go and watch a band I have never seen before... and I will have tears rolling down my face because of the overwhelming sensations." – Simon [46:06]

• On environmental accommodations:
  "Now that I work from home and have a lot more control over my environment... I'm now running a lot more optimally and getting a lot more done." – Simon [59:50]

• On conflicting neurodivergent needs:
  "We're just top trumping each other, going, well, I have this. So you have that and you have that." – Simon [72:42]

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• [02:00] Jordan’s back injury and immediate impacts
• [13:30] Introduction and definitions of hypersensitivity
• [14:55] Sensory stories: sounds and footsteps
• [21:06] The “Satellite" story: hearing conversations from a distance
• [25:36] Early aversion to perfumes and breakdown of smells
• [32:03] The Princess and the Pea analogy for touch sensitivity
• [36:54] Social/sensory challenges with partner’s echolalia and loud music
• [41:39] Ambulance sirens, clapping, and public discomfort
• [46:06] Frisson—emotional overwhelm through music
• [65:16] The transformational impact of noise-cancelling headphones
• [69:00] Discomfort in communal sensory environments (cinema, theater, wrestling events)
• [71:07] Debating accommodations and entitlement in public
• [78:38] The necessity of humor and acceptance

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Tone and Overall Message

Warm, frank, funny, gently irreverent, and deeply validating. Both hosts weave between intimate emotional moments and laugh-out-loud personal anecdotes, breaking the stigma around hypersensitivity. They model self-acceptance and advocate for greater understanding toward all neurodivergent experiences—reminding listeners that there is no single or "right" way to navigate a world built for different senses.

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Final Thoughts

This episode is a must-listen for neurodivergent folks struggling with hypersensitivity, those supporting them, and anyone seeking a compassionate, detailed primer on the lived realities—both challenging and beautiful—of heightened sensory perception.

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Transcript

[Simon Scott]

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[Simon Scott]

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[Jordan James]

Welcome to the Neurodivergent Experience podcast, a podcast where we share the lived experiences of neurodivergent people to help create a better understanding for our community.

[Simon Scott]

Join us every week as we bring you honest, raw and inspiring conversations with specialists, advocates and individuals who know exactly what it's like to live the neurodivergent experience.

[Jordan James]

I'm Jordan James, a neurodivergent specialist, father of neurodivergent children, husband to a neurodivergent wife and author of the Autistic Experience. And I'm joined by my best friend.

[Simon Scott]

I'm Simon Scott. I'm an autistic ADHD broadcaster, actor and advocate. Join us as we journey into unraveling the neurodivergent Experience.

[Jordan James]

Hello. Hello and welcome back to the neurodivergent Experience. I am broken in half.

[Simon Scott]

Oh no. It's in the power of audio. You can't see what I can see. But he's like just sort of like, I this is what I imagine. I sort of like if we were still doing the podcast when we're both in like old people's homes, you're just sort of like, oh great.

[Jordan James]

I'm a hundred. It's my 111th birthday.

[Simon Scott]

This is those 10,000. That was still. No one believes when there are divergence still.

[Jordan James]

Well, I am. I am basically snapped in half.

[Simon Scott]

You're not well, are you?

[Jordan James]

Yeah. On Saturday I went to the gym. My back wasn't feeling perfect, but it was fine. At the end of my workout, Sylvia asked me to lift a 25 kilo disc weight off the Floor because she couldn't lift it. And I was like, yeah, I can do that. Like, it wasn't a macho thing. It was like, yeah, I mean, I, I can do that. Turns out, no, I, I couldn't do that. I mean, I could do it. I literally, I physically did it, but now I, now I can't even move because it, it started with, it, it started with a twinge. It started with a twinge. I came home about three hours later, I was like, okay, this, this is painful. Like, it was right in the center of my spine, right on the coccyx. And then the next day it was, it was painful, but I could walk, right? So I went to the gym and I thought, you know, because the best thing to do is just keep walking, rest and keep moving. Rest and keep moving. And I, I was able to, to walk on the treadmill. I went about 3 mile an hour and I lost track of time and I walked on it for an hour. And that was really, that was, that was the catalyst of the, that was silly of the, the severe injury, because then I came home and I was still feeling fine. I sat down on my chair and I was playing video games for a couple of hours. And then when I tried to get up after that, that was when it was like, holy shit, there is so much pain. But again, I was still able to move on my own, right? So I went to bed. Woke up in the morning, still able to walk. After I got up, tried to get down the stairs, three steps down, I collapsed. Oh, I collapsed. And the pain was so bad, I was screaming in agony, pounding my fist against the wall from pure frustration of, like, the amount of pain I was in. And Simon, my son, and Sylvia came rushing out. I just wanted to go downstairs for a coffee. They came out, they couldn't lift me up because it was too painful for them to lift me up. So I had to shuffle on my backside all the way down to the bottom of the stairs. Then Simon tried to pull me up and I screamed again. Then it turned out that he was able to push me up, so he physically pushed me from the back. And then Sylvia helped me up, managed to get to the chair. And yeah, that was, that was Monday and I've pretty much been immobile ever since.

[Simon Scott]

And I was like, how are you? And you were like, still in the chair. I was like, oh, mate.

[Jordan James]

Yeah, so it's, it obviously spoke to the doctor, spoke to a physio what's done a lot of the, the old autistic research. Obviously, I'VE had lots of back problems. It's kind of my thing. And I pretty much know what this is. I've had this before. It's, it's. It's a trap nerve. I don't know what's trapping it. Possibly a slip disc. I'm hoping not. I'm hoping this is. It's. It's just like maybe a sprained tendon or something.

[Simon Scott]

Or something.

[Jordan James]

But, yeah, the fact is, is that I'm able to walk because I bought a compression belt. So this morning I was actually able to walk without using my. My walking sticks because I got walking sticks from the last time I hurt myself this badly. It's just getting up and down that, and I can't lean over at all. Yeah, this. This is, this is the point I'm in. So I'm literally laying in my chair and Sylvia set up all the, the podcasts and she set it all up so I'm able to actually talk to you. And yes, I'm just stuck. Completely dependent on others. Sylvia had to shower me this morning because I literally, I can't even shower myself. So, yeah, like, I got nurse Sylvia to look after me and she's also.

[Simon Scott]

A producer Sylvia because she set up all the kit. So she got a lot of credits today, bless her.

[Jordan James]

Yeah. But yeah, if it wasn't for. For Simon. Sylvia and Sophie's giving me hugs because Sylvia and Simon don't know how to, like, they, they don't know how to process their emotions when they see me in this much pain.

[Simon Scott]

They're all just like, patting you on the head, are they?

[Jordan James]

Dude? At one point I was laying down and I was crying because I was so upset that this has happened again. I was so annoyed at myself and like, so many fails. So many fails. Scared. Scared was the number one. And it's terrifying.

[Simon Scott]

Yeah.

[Jordan James]

Because I. Because I don't know how long this is going to take and I, I don't. I don't know. And I don't get paid when I'm off work. I don't. I don't get sick pay. So I. No idea how this is going to affect me financially. And there's so many things that worrying me. And I'm just sitting there crying and Sylvie's eating a sandwich and she just looks at me and then carries on eating the sandwich. Sophie comes over and gives me the biggest hug and she's like, oh, it's okay, Daddy. I love you. And I'm like, thank you. And I. And I. And I sort of. I look out the corner of my eye and Sylvie is just because bless her, she, she looked like a deer in headlights. She just doesn't, she doesn't know what to do.

[Simon Scott]

Yeah.

[Jordan James]

Later on when, when I wasn't crying and I was just laying down, she came over and she gave me hugs and kisses. But it's like in that moment she just, she can't process it. She doesn't know how to deal with, with seeing someone that.

[Simon Scott]

Paralysis by analysis. Yeah.

[Jordan James]

Yeah. Because she freaking loves me and she, she doesn't know what to do. But I will say something.

[Simon Scott]

Sandwich.

[Jordan James]

So just carrying the sand. I, I will tell you a funny story from this morning that it's funny not funny. Before we get on with today's episode. So at the had my shower or Sylvia showered me. I've come out and she's helping me get back to the bed and I, I put my hands on the back of her shoulders so she's in front of me and as we're walking she just goes choo choo. And I freaking cracked up because literally it's like oh my little train. And, and that was the worst pain I might have ever had in my life was cracking up at Sylvia's really badly timed but perfectly wonderful joke but. And oh my God, I was like please don't do that, please don't do that. It was so freaking painful and I had to stop because I kept, every time I thought about it I was going to laugh again and I was like how the hell am I going to get anywhere because if, if I go, if I hold on to her again, I'm just going to think about Juju and die. So I was like stuck. So I had to take like 30 seconds to calm down. So I didn't laugh again because oh my God, it was only a snigger. It was like okay. And it was me and I laid on the bed and she's, she's helping me put my, my shorts on and she's like one foot in and one foot. I'm like. And I just, and I'm laughing.

[Simon Scott]

This is all ages at once. You're in your 40s dealing with back pain and you're like I've got a.

[Jordan James]

Five year old child helping me at this point. And I, and I just, once I got laying down, I said babe, could you like maybe call for a grown up to, to assist me because at the moment I've just got a five year old child this having like awkward jokes. And she's like I don't know why I said it was just in my head and I said it. I was like, no, I get it, babe. It's fine. I get it. But, yeah, is there a grown up that can look after me? So the answer is no. In my house, there is no grownups to look after me.

[Simon Scott]

So, yeah, Ice cream for breakfast it is. Then.

[Jordan James]

Yeah, she. She made me an egg wrap and then filled it so much with baked beans, she couldn't close it. And I'm lying down because I can't sit. I can't be in a sitting position. And I. And I'm trying to eat these beans and I've got the. The plate rested right on my chest and I'm trying to, like, eat. Eat the beans, like, just like shovel them into my mouth. And I'm just like, I might need someone to feed me at some point. Like, I'm that. That bad. But no, I. I managed it. But, yeah, bless her, she. She's trying her best, but she's just gone for. For some eye surgery, so. Oh, yeah, okay. I. I wasn't able to go with her, which sucked, but luckily she's got a Simon's other half and Sophie have gone with her, but.

[Simon Scott]

Bloody comedy of errors in the James household. It's a nightmare couple of days. It's a living, waking nightmare.

[Jordan James]

Yeah. I think the worst thing is I just feel so useless and. And helpless and, like, I hate it. Like, I can't. I can't even lean over, like, enough to, like, grab something from the side of me. So, like, something is just out of my reach and I have to call someone from upstairs to come down just to move my phone like, 2 inches closer to me.

[Simon Scott]

Disabled. Very disabling.

[Jordan James]

Yeah. And it's. It's almost embarrassing, but I know it's not because there's nothing I can do about it. And I'm having. I'm having a lot of internal ableism right now. A lot of internal ableism. But I had a session with Ashley. Ashley Bentley, the best ever. And it definitely helped. It definitely helped to help me calm down a bit and. But yeah, so this. This is. This is the position I'm in. And we are here to talk about hypersensitivity, which is really kicking my ass at the moment.

[Simon Scott]

Yes, it's. Yeah, it's a very, very literal episode. Obviously, pain and hypersensitivity is something that you're really experiencing right now. And it's something that I've also had to navigate. I constantly feel absolutely everything that's happening in my body all at once at every given Time and it's rather a bit frustrating. But hypersensitivity doesn't just sort of sit with pain. It sits with so much. I know for a fact, Jordan, that you and I both wear sunglasses in storms on dark days, even in a slightly overcast day up in Merseyside today, I wore sunglasses when I drove my other half to work this morning, even though it was lashing it down with rain. So there's. There's so many different sorts of sensitivities that I think we nd people experience at all given times, on top of, you know, trying to just like navigate meat body maintenance. Because I know for a fact as well that your hearing like mine is ridiculously sensitive. I was having this conversation at Leeds Fest with my team Vibes crew, how we were all discussing how we could all tell who was coming back to the camp dependent on how their foot fall sounded as they were walking up.

[Jordan James]

Oh, okay.

[Simon Scott]

So, like, some of us were in our tents and we could tell who was up and about because of just how they were walking. And we were discussing how I could hear my. Who was coming up the stairs, whether it was my mum and my dad, depending on how the feet sounded and things like that. And I thought it was just me that did that. Turns out it's quite a lot of us. But also, like, with touch, I don't really have a lot of sensitivity with touch and definitely not with smell. I. Sometimes I don't even feel like I can smell anything half the time.

[Jordan James]

Yeah, because. Interesting, because obviously you can be hypersensitive, but we can be under sensitive with. With a lot of sensations. So, you know that that's why it's hard to, to navigate and judge pain because, like, I don't know if it's worse than it is because maybe I'm. I'm not experiencing enough pain or is. It's nowhere near as bad as I think it is because I'm so sensitive to pain, which, which is, which is scary in the position I'm in at the moment, because I, I generally am okay with pain. Like, I don't actually. I'm. I'm under sensitive with pain. Like, when I have a tattoo, I don't. I don't feel it.

[Simon Scott]

Yeah, I'm glad you mentioned that. I've had many a tattoo in, like, they call them, like the pain centers, like in the inside of the arm and in places like that. And there's certain places I've been tattooed and the artists have said to me, you're freaking hardcore, dude. You just Sort of sit in and going through this, I was like, oh, this isn't. This isn't too bad at all.

[Jordan James]

Yeah. They're like, oh, are you okay? And I'm like, yeah, I'm fine. And they're like, really?

[Simon Scott]

Yeah. But then I got a splinter under my fingernail the other day and nearly had a panic attack because I was like, oh, it hurts. But then I was also like, what if I don't get it out? What if it stays in there forever? I'll call it Frank. And then just started, just, just escalated away from me.

[Jordan James]

I like Frank. Frank's a good name.

[Simon Scott]

It's a good name, right? And it was the only thing that I could like, think about. So I almost.

[Jordan James]

You could have just called it Splinter.

[Simon Scott]

See, this is. Yeah.

[Jordan James]

And then the rest, the rest of your fingers could have been Leonardo Michael.

[Simon Scott]

And you got a little splinter and the little thumbs. Yeah. So, long story short, I always underestimate or overestimate. My pain is like I've got this thing going on at the moment. I slept funny. And because I have like hypermobility in my hands and stuff, I've got a finger that I stim on where I crack my knuckle and I've reached a point where I'm overdoing it and I've bruised it and I can feel it, but I can't feel it. And I'm like, it's bruised. Is it broken? Is it not broken? I think it's fine. And that's what I always seem to come to with pain, is I'll be in a ridiculous amount of pain. And I'll go, yeah, it's all right. I think, because I can't judge. It's like, I see people with certain injuries and stuff. I mean, dude, I did a Duke of Edinburgh with a torn ACL because I couldn't feel it. I was just like, oh, yeah, my knees a bit sore, went and had a scan. I had a fractured kneecap and a torn ACL and ruptured tendon and my quad or torn. And I did a 15 mile walk on it and just sort of was like, oh, yeah, it's fine. And then couldn't walk for a month.

[Jordan James]

Yeah, that's the thing. It's like, I wonder if, like when I first hurt myself, I just. Most people would have been like, oh, that's really bad. But I was like, oh, there's nothing. It's like a slight twinge and I'm wondering, just a flesh wound. Yeah. Because I think, I think that if I Had. Had, like, the right amount of pain, because pain is. Is your body saying stop, that something's wrong? The warning system, it's just a warning system. It's saying something's really wrong. And if it doesn't. If the warning light doesn't come on, then I'm just going to keep driving. So I literally. I wonder, like, if. If I had been in, like, a correct amount of pain, I probably wouldn't have walked on that treadmill. I wouldn't have have pushed myself over the edge because I was teetering on the cliff and I literally just. I went ahead yourself, straight over the cliff. I feel like everyone. But I mean, that's. That's adhd, isn't it? It's. It's like, I just. I hate the idea of just, like, not being able to move. So I'm like, oh, okay, I can just go to the gym. But then I get distracted.

[Simon Scott]

It's the causation in it.

[Jordan James]

I'm sure. I'm sure if I'd have done like 20 minutes, which is the amount I should have done, I would have been fine. But because I'm not feeling that pain because I get distracted and I'm wondering how much of the distraction actually means that I don't feel that pain. Like, I'm so distracted that I don't feel the pain. But, you know, that's the thing about our brains, is that we can't possibly know because it just does shit. And then we kind of just get on with our day. It's like, we can't. It's really difficult to pinpoint exactly what went wrong with our thinking because our thinking is so erratic, you know, and it's like, well, that's. That's where the methylphenidate helps, because then you can make better decisions. But, yeah, get. Getting back to the subject.

[Simon Scott]

No, but that is on subject. But, yeah, no, I know. Yeah.

[Jordan James]

But, yeah, my, My hearing is. Is super sensitive. Like, I. I've always had it. When, when I was a kid, I remember when I did, like, an internship when. When you're a kid, you go and do work experience. And I did work experience for Bullfrog games in Guildford, which is. Yeah, yeah, it's. They were owned by ea and I was doing games testing on a game called Gene wars. And there Bullfrog made like, the original theme hospital.

[Simon Scott]

Oh, right, okay.

[Jordan James]

And. And they gave me a copy of that game, which was really, really cool. Yeah, the game's called Gene wars. And they, they nicknamed me Satellite because I was. I was hearing Conversation. I was hearing conversations in. In the very, very large room. Like, I could hear what people were saying in a conversation from the other side of the room. And they were like, how did you know what we were saying? And I was like, I don't know. I could just hear you. And they're like, oh, you're like satellite. You are. So literally, I. I had a signed copy of the game saying, two satellites. Thanks for the help. I lost that adhd, which is a bit of a shame. It's one of those fun memories. But, yeah, it's. It. It's just. It's something I've always had is just really hypersensitive hearing, which obviously is. Is great in, like, certain situations where, you know, hearing is advantageous. Like when I was used to, I lived in the countryside, so I walk along roads because there wasn't any paths. So, like the back roads. And when I'd walk on the back roads, I'd always have to listen out for cars.

[Simon Scott]

Yeah. Oh, God, yeah. Yeah, brilliant.

[Jordan James]

So I'd be able to hear cars, like, from so far away that I would, you know, be able to move to the side of the roads and get hit by a car. But, yeah, I mean, just. Just as, like, you know, evolutionary wise, it was very advantageous to have really good hearing.

[Simon Scott]

Oh, absolutely.

[Jordan James]

Really? You know, good eyesight, you know, being more sensitive to light. It sucks during the day. Sucks. You know, in modern lighting. You know, the sort of.

[Simon Scott]

The fluorescent light.

[Jordan James]

Fluorescent lighting, yeah. But it would have been very advantageous, you know, in the dark. Like flipping Riddick. I can see in the dark because it's like a cat. Like, cat eyes are really sensitive, which is why they can see in the dark.

[Simon Scott]

Yeah. This is why I was discussing this with my. With my camping friends. As we were saying, I've got, like, ridic vision is. I can sit at night. And so I even had it the other night where I carris. When she comes upstairs, she, like. She still does that thing that kids do where, like, it'll be darker, she'll go. And she, like, runs straight up the stairs, but we've got a light switch at the top. So I normally never leave her in dark because it just instantly freaks her out. But I will walk downstairs in the pitch black and just, like, go and get a drink. She's like, why'd you never turn the lights on? I'm like, my eyes adjust to the dark.

[Jordan James]

Yeah, it hurts your eyes, but you.

[Simon Scott]

Yeah, yeah. And I had it, the festival, when I was around the campfire. I was saying, I would have been brilliant as a late time scout person in a tribe because I could have sat up, I could have sat there in the dark and seen. And also I would have heard footsteps come towards me and I would have known if it was friend or foe. Like that is so, so important evolutionary wise for tribe, you know, species. Having a person in your tribe that has that sort of ability to protect, you know, you're heard almost and in the modern world is totally useless if anything is an absolute hindrance. Because I've been out and about in life. Like I walk around a supermarket, dude, and I am. I feel like I've been flashbanged. Every aisle I go down and every single person that I walk to, my brain is picking up on every single conversation except the one that I actually need to listen to. It's like Caris will be talking to me about what I want for lunch and she'll go, what do you want for lunch? I go, I don't know, but I think they're breaking up. It's like, that's not useful. But it's just sort of like how everything sort of like tunes in. But then my sense of smell and my sense of taste are absolutely pants, dude. It's like I'll eat most food and I'll go flavor.

[Jordan James]

And then, yeah, I have that with.

[Simon Scott]

Flavor and then smell. So I can walk through the fish aisle of any supermarket and not even blink. I don't even feel it.

[Jordan James]

I can, I can smell. You remember like when, like Debenhams and places like that, when the first thing you'd come across when you went in those stores was the perfume bit?

[Simon Scott]

Oh, yeah.

[Jordan James]

They have it in my, my local boots now as well. When I was a kid, I used to have to run through that section with my breath held because I couldn't stand the, the smell. Because I could just smell the chemicals. I. Sorry, I can't see the overall. I can only break down those smells and then smell the chemicals. So I would, I would hold my breath if I ever wanted to go into a, you know, a Debenhams, particularly. I remember it being in Guildford, there was a Debenhams and I'd have to hold my breath and run through to get to the clothes or to get to the bottom. And this lasted for a long time. But as I got older, I don't know if it's. I got used to it. I don't know, but maybe I got better. I. It didn't bother me as much. But still to this day, I. I struggle to find like a. An aftershave or an eau de toilet or whatever it is that doesn't then break down. And I can smell all the chemicals only. And it was. It was. Weirdly, it was worse after Covid. I never officially got Covid, even though I had every freaking symptom of COVID The guys I worked with had exactly the same thing as me. They. They caught it off each other. They must have given it to me at the time. You know, this is 2020 or 2021. And we all had exactly the same symptoms. In fact, mine was even worse. Like, one minute I'm really cold, the next minute I'm really hot.

[Simon Scott]

I felt the same. Yeah. Never had a positive, though.

[Jordan James]

And. And I tested every day and it never went positive. Just like you never was positive the same. And both of them tested positive, and I didn't. It was the freakiest thing, but. So I'm sure I had it. But at afterwards, that breaking down of. Of the smells, that. That was there again. So it was almost gone.

[Simon Scott]

Like a hard reset.

[Jordan James]

Yeah, like a hard reset. So it's. It's starting to get better now. But there was a point when I'll be at work, and obviously, especially during COVID everybody was clean down all the surfaces with the antibacterial spray. Yeah. And I, like, they could spray on the other side of the room, and I'd smell it so much, and it would just be the chemicals. So I was like. Like just smelling pure chemicals. And it was like it was up my nose, and my nose would burn. It would be a burning sensation in my nose, and I wouldn't be able to take it. And many times I. You know, I might be in charge, but I still have to sit in the control room and couldn't be in there. I'd have to go outside. I'd have to leave the room. And I kept saying to them, please, please don't spray a lot.

[Simon Scott]

And enough.

[Jordan James]

And they. They kept doing it. They kept spraying loads because they just didn't understand how terrible it was. They wouldn't believe me or they didn't care or whatever it was. But there was one guy in particular, I swear to use half a bottle every freaking time. He was terrified of COVID Like, terrified. He would spray every. Spray the phone, he'd spray the screens, he'd spray the radios. It'd spray himself. I'm surprised he'd come and spray me, but then I'd have made him eat it. I. It was. It was horrendous. It was a sensory nightmare. But. But that's the thing is that when it comes to being hypersensitive, it's like in those situations, it is absolutely a disability. A huge, huge disability. Anything that stops you from living your life in the way that you want to live it is a disability. And I had to come to terms with the fact that, yes, okay, this is a terrible thing. But during my journey, I've also realized how it's also a really great thing to have this sense of smell because I'll go into a nice gardens and I can smell all the flowers. Like, I can just smell. And the smell is glorious. Like, I love the smell of flowers. I can smell like the dew on the grass in the morning. I can smell rain on concrete. There's a. There's a smell of any of that. And it's so love. It's such a lovely smell. I can. I can smell the. The sort of burn or like aftershock of lightning. It's weird. Yeah. So there's like. There's like a burning smell, but it's nice. It's. It's like a night. If I'm outside, obviously not inside, but it's. It's amazing the smells I can pick up. I love the smell of a steam train. I love. And I can smell a steam train from a mile away. I'm just like. Same with like, fires, burning wood. If I'm too close, it's too much, but if I'm far enough away. But I can. I can smell the. The gunpowder or whatever it is. I'm pretty sure it's gunpowder from. And the smoke from fireworks. That's why I can't go to fireworks displays. 1. It's too loud and it's too bright and there's too many people. But I go really far away, like on the top of a hill or something, miles and miles away and. And I can still smell the fireworks where I am. It's crazy.

[Simon Scott]

That's wild.

[Jordan James]

So it's. It's wonderful in many things, but, like, it's terrible with other things. Like, it's. It's two sides the same coin.

[Simon Scott]

Yeah. That's so interesting. I can't almost imagine being able to smell all of that because I can feel when it's going to rain, but I feel it almost like on my skin rather than a smell. I was with Caris yesterday and I was like, oh, look at all the goals that are in. It's gonna rain soon.

[Jordan James]

Change in temperature as well. And like, I have hypersensitive skin. Do you ever get it? Like, you will have. Like, there's nothing there. Like there's nothing on your skin, but suddenly you just feel something?

[Simon Scott]

Yeah, all the time. All. Especially when I wear shorts all the time. It's like, there's a spider on my leg. No, there isn't. It's an unusual. God, I've never had anybody else say that. That's really weird.

[Jordan James]

But it could. It could just be some hair that is just slightly. Like a curly hair slightly touching and you're just like, oh, God. The. The worst for me is if I. If I have, like, even the smallest stone in my shoe. Oh, like, even, like a speck of dirt. I'm like the Princess and the Pea, dude. Like, literally the story of the Princess and the P. Is she's just autistic. Like, the reason she can feel that pee through all those mattresses, that girl's autistic. And that's how I feel. Like I can just feel something in my shoe through my sock and it could be the smallest speck of dirt and it. And. And it. Oh, it drives me insane. It drives me so bad.

[Simon Scott]

Isn't it crazy how you can feel a stone in your shoe, but if it then went into your skin, it almost doesn't feel half as much as, like. Because I've had it before where, like, I've had bits of, like, grass or sand in my shoe when I've been playing golf and I've had to take my shoe off and brush my sock down to within an inch of its life. And, yeah, I can, you know, walk barefoot and get something going to the bottom of my foot and I just kind of go, oh, brush it off and move on with my life. But then if I got sand in between my toes, I'm considering removing my foot.

[Jordan James]

Don't even go there. Sand in between my toes. I.

[Simon Scott]

Exactly. So that's what I mean is it's like. It's such a contradiction. It's very, very fascinating. But we'll take a break here and when we come back, I think we'll have a bit of a discussion about, you know, for good and bad reasons, how hypersensitivity affects our lives. So we'll be right back after this break. This is a neurodivergent experience. Public announcement. If you live in England and you or a loved one is waiting for an autism or ADHD assessment, you don't have to wait years. RTN Diagnostics is now part of the NHS Right to choose scheme, which means if your local wait for a consultant led autism or ADHD assessment is more than 18 weeks. You can choose RTN instead and it won't cost you a penny. Jordan chose RTN for his own family because their care and attention to detail were second to none. They didn't just diagnose autism and adhd, they looked at the full picture, including pda, ocd, anxiety and more. The team is friendly, neuroaffirming and comprises many neurodivergent individuals, so they truly understand. Getting started is simple. Download the GP referral letter and questionnaire from the link in our show notes. Take those to your GP and ask for a referral to RTN diagnostics. If approved, RTN will be in touch within eight weeks to begin your assessment. Remember, this only applies in England and some exclusions do apply. RTN is not currently able to accept referrals for child ADHD assessments, so check the details before you start RTN diagnostics, helping you get the answers you deserve without the wait. Welcome back to the Neurodivergent Experience. Simon Scott sat with a laying down Jordan James. Unfortunately, he's not doing very well and we're talking about hypersensitivity. You know, we've discussed pain, light touch, hearing and taste, but it's not as simple as that because it has great effects on our lives. And one of the things, Jordan, that my hypersensitivity has a lot of effects on is socially. Yeah, it affects me in a lot of ways. Simply something it's. And it's difficult because I'm in this sort of. With my hypersensitivity of going, I have a neurodivergent person that I live with and share my life with who is currently going through a big period of echolalia. Her favorite musician has released a new album. It is on 247 in my house. She is walking around saying random lines of it.

[Jordan James]

What's the musician?

[Simon Scott]

It's Sabrina Carpenter. She's got a new album.

[Jordan James]

I knew it. Sophie. Sophie was banging on. She's so excited.

[Simon Scott]

It's an un. It's a. Do you know what, mate? It is a fantastic album.

[Jordan James]

Brilliantly produced.

[Simon Scott]

She's a great, you know, singer, songwriter.

[Jordan James]

Yeah, no, I. I think she's great.

[Simon Scott]

Yeah, she's awesome. But what my partner keeps doing, she keeps just saying one line of a song, but she will sing it at full volume whether I am a foot away or on the other side of the house.

[Jordan James]

Ouch.

[Simon Scott]

If I'm sat next to her in the car, you know, and it's like a bell ringing in my brain, dude. And I know she can't help it, but I can't help how it sort of, it, like, reacts to me. And another thing that my partner does as well, which again, I love about her, but it also, sometimes when I'm feeling really sensitive, can. Can trigger me a little bit, she gets so excited that she screams. It's like she, you know, somebody will put a post out on Instagram and rather than her going, oh, oh my God, that's great, she will scream. She'll go like, ah. And it proper makes me jump and I go like. And that can be really disabling for me. And I know it's not her fault and it's not mine either, but like, when I'm sort of like, as an example, right, I was feeling really low energy yesterday and I was just playing a video game and she was like, I'll just come and sit with you. And as she sat with me, she's on Instagram with the volume up. She's screwing through things, going through things and going through. And I'm like. And it was like my brain was stalling.

[Jordan James]

Oh, this is.

[Simon Scott]

This is. This is the worst. So that's something that can. Some, you know, I can sometimes struggle with and light as well. Dude, I can be. Oh, man. I was driving a little while ago and I'd forgotten my sunglasses. Some so simple. I'd forgotten my sunglasses. I always have a spare pair in the car and this numpty took his spare pair into the house, left them in the house, got back in the car and didn't have them. And as I'm driving, the. The sun was quite low and I actually had to pull over and wait for the sun to dip for maybe 20 minutes before I could continue driving because I was genuinely blind. I felt like, it's good that you.

[Jordan James]

Did that though, because I know a lot of people that would just carry on driving.

[Simon Scott]

Oh, no, screw that. I'm not doing.

[Jordan James]

That's called accident.

[Simon Scott]

That's called accident prone. And there's some things, like, they're just little things, right? Like my partner singing along to a song really loud in the house shouldn't be disabling for me, but yet it is. And I can't control when it is or it isn't disabling. There'll be days where it doesn't eat. It's like, woof. It just goes straight over me. I don't even feel it. And then there'll be certain days where like, I was just sat here yesterday and she's just going, come into the house tour and then says nothing. And then the song will change in her head and she'll do a different echolalia. And it's like my brain just sort of focuses in on it and anything else, everything just becomes really irritating. And I had to say to her last night, I was like, look says, I'm really sorry that I've been a bit off tonight. It's because I'm just feeling so hypersensitive at the moment. And I know that you're loving this album. And I went, and I'm really enjoying it too, but I just. I just need a bit of quiet time. She's like, all right, that's cool. I feel like a dick when I ask for that, but I also know that I'm going to be even worse if I don't. And it's disabling because I don't want to be an asshole because I'm oversensitive.

[Jordan James]

Yeah, that's. That's the thing is it is. It does get to the point where it was a massively affect your mental health and it can really make me like triggered so much. It's. It's like for instance, with, with my hearing. I. I struggle to go on trains in general because of how busy they.

[Simon Scott]

Might be there a lot, aren't they?

[Jordan James]

I. I don't like being touched because I'm sensitive to touch only by the.

[Simon Scott]

People I want to be touched by. If I go for a hug, I'm letting you in. But if somebody just brushes up against me, I'm like, get off me.

[Jordan James]

No, no, get off me. Oh, don't, don't do that. Don't. Don't touch me. Don't touch me. Yeah, yeah. Consensual touches is fine, but unintentional, like on a train. No thanks. Also, they. They smell. I can probably smell like somebody who's been on the night before who was drunk. I could still smell the alcohol in the air because it was. Smell the booze. It was. But it's not just that. It's. It's underground trains. When I, When I was traveling around London, it's when they go around corners.

[Simon Scott]

Oh, the Central Line screech.

[Jordan James]

That screech cripples me. I. I have to quickly slap my hands over my ears or even more extreme, put my. My fingers inside my ears to just to dale it.

[Simon Scott]

I feel so self conscious when I do that though. I feel so childish. Like when an ambulance goes past and I put my hand over my ears.

[Jordan James]

Yeah, ambulance, yeah.

[Simon Scott]

I feel so childish when I do.

[Jordan James]

That you see that. I suppose that's the difference in. In, like, how. How I've come along is that I just don't care.

[Simon Scott]

Like, I. I wish I had that sort of.

[Jordan James]

I will quite happily in this situation. The other one. I had it the other day when. When we were at Sophie's graduation ceremony. Of course, everybody is clapping and I. I can't do clapping, so I'm not clapping. I'm. I've got my hands over my ears and everyone else is clapping, but I. I don't care, like, if somebody is looking at me, because the fact is, is that most of the time no one's looking at you. Like, you are not the star of the show. No one. No one really cares what you're doing.

[Simon Scott]

No one cares.

[Jordan James]

And. And at the most, if anybody did look over, they'll probably be like, oh, that. That guy's struggling with hearing. You know, there's. It's not. People aren't going to be like, what's that freak doing?

[Simon Scott]

And it's just me, this thinking.

[Jordan James]

If somebody does think that, well, they're a dick. So why do you care what they think? They're obviously a twat. So why.

[Simon Scott]

I love talking to you, dude, because you make me normalize how I feel. But, you know, it's funny you say that with the, with the noise thing, the amount of live music that I go and watch, like big speakers blaring and stuff, and I'll wear loops, I wear ear protectors and stuff. That's never the bit that gets me. The bit that gets me is when the crowd screams. Like, every single person screams and it almost sounds like a heart monitor flatlining for me. And it's the ringing that happens in my ears. I feel like that's the bit that makes my ears ring days later. It's not the. The noise. And again, it's noise I wouldn't choose, but I've.

[Jordan James]

I've actually figured this out, is that it's. It's just. It's the tone, it's not the volume that bothers me because obviously my ears are hypersensitive, so I'm going to hear everything at a higher volume anyway. But what triggers me, what upsets me is that is the. The tone.

[Simon Scott]

So it's frequency.

[Jordan James]

Yeah. If it's basy, if it's low, no problem at all. Right. So when. When Milo, when my big dog barks, it. It doesn't bother me. But when Ollie, when the little nappies get. When he barks, oh, my God, it. It kills me which is why, like someone screaming or a crying baby or a fire bell or something like that, or drill going again. And that might sound like it's going to be like low frequency, but it's not that. That hitting against the concrete that is high, that crushes me, that completely and utterly disables me. But like you said, going to a concert, if I'm listening to like, you know, music and it's loud and that doesn't bother me, you know, or, or, you know, loudspeakers. I mean, I've got like a big subwoofer and I love going to the cinema and listening to and seeing imax.

[Simon Scott]

Oh, IMAX movies are unreal to sort of let's float in.

[Jordan James]

But my friend, he can't do IMAX because he gets triggered by low frequency. So he said like fireballs and stuff don't bother him at all. But if it's too bassy, that's when he gets triggered. Which is why we always say we're all, we all are so different, but we're all so similar. So we both have get triggered by frequencies. It's just the different frequency.

[Simon Scott]

Yeah. So I'll sit in a horror film and I know when the scary parts come in because in most horror films they play. I think it's like below 18 hertz or something. Like it's very, very, very low frequency, big waveforms. And the reason as to why they play these sounds before something scary like a jump scare or something happens in horror films, like moments of tension, is because it vibrates the bones that sit on your eardrum and that activates fight or flight. And it's the sort of, you know, the genetic pickup of there's an animal growling or things like that. And they play in horror films specifically to activate your. So I can only imagine your friend who suffers with really low frequency sensitivity, that's just an absolute nightmare for his nervous system sitting in something like that. But when it comes to sound, one of the things that I've sort of had to work through internalized ableism from. And I've only found a name for this, this feeling in the last couple of days when we've been sort of building up to recording this. And it's called frizz like frison F R I S S O N. And it's described as a sudden, intense and pleasurable rush or thrill often accompanied by physical sensations like goosebumps and shivers. And it can also relate to, you know, crying and tears. And it's most commonly experienced in response to a rewarding stimuli such as emotive music or beautiful art. I will go and watch a band I have never seen before. Dude. And I will have tears rolling down my face because of the overwhelming sensations that I get from it. It's like I was watching bloody K Pop Demon Hunters on Netflix with Caris. Right. If you've not watched it, super fun film.

[Jordan James]

Oh, no, I, I watched it. It was a movie.

[Simon Scott]

It was a movie, but there were certain moments in it where the music just hit in a certain way that made me really, really emotional.

[Jordan James]

I actually, I didn't like the movie, but I did like the music.

[Simon Scott]

Music was brilliant. But I went to go see CH with Caris and as soon as she walked on stage, she did this like really big crescendo intro that built and it creates like a motion and tension. It feels so theatrical and dude, I felt so self conscious that I had to put sunglasses on because I didn't want people to look around and see that I had tears in my eyes and it was rolling down my face. Not because I was like, oh my God, Chapel rounds on stage. Oh my God. It was that. I was just so overwhelmed by this intense rush of everything that it just leaks out of my face. And it used to make me so self conscious. Not as much as it does now. Like, you know, you know, I'm better with it, but I still feel very sort of like when it comes, I'm like, oh, all right, okay. And it is a weird sort of feeling to sort of sit with, but I'll have it. Like, I was in the gym yesterday and a certain song came on and as I'm working out, it's almost like the roller coaster hits the peak and I come down, I get this real adrenaline rush just from listening to music.

[Jordan James]

Yeah, I, I, I know, exactly. I'm very, very emotional with lots of things. I didn't know it was anything to do with, like, sound though. I just thought it was like, for me it's more of like an empathy thing. Just, just quickly I was like, I was playing Gears of War too. And there's a bit where one of the characters finds his wife after all these years, he's been looking for his wife and she's in, she's not in a good way. She, she's not well. And yeah, she's basically almost dead. And I just, the, the whole story of, like, him looking for her in this like horrific post apocalyptic time, it just, I just think, oh, that's just me. Like, that's what I would do for Sylvia. Like I would. I would move heaven and earth to find Sylvia, no matter what obstacle was put in my way. And to think that if when I found her, finally found her, that in such a state, it was too late to. Should. Should never. She'd never recover. So I just. That that's what makes me just ask. It's so emotional. I'm. I'm sitting and I'm just crying while playing this, like, essential, like, shooter. It's, It's a gory shooter. And I'm crying because. Yeah, so I, I didn't know about the, the sound thing. That's really interesting that me being sensitive to, to, to feelings is, Is just as valid. It's. It's that, you know, we, we feel empathy to such a high degree. This is how I look at it, is that we shut down, that we feel it so much that we can't take it. So we just shut down. So it looks like we're not feeling anything, anything, any emotion. And it's exactly that with Sylvia, when she's seeing me crying, she's seeing me in pain, she's seeing me upset, and she just. Like a deer in the headlights, she just, she's like, I. She doesn't. She freezes. She doesn't know what to do because she's so overwhelmed with empathy that it's. She's almost like. It's just. Her brain crashes and it has to have a restart.

[Simon Scott]

And that's why they say, like, you come across as cold. It's because you freeze.

[Jordan James]

Yeah, it's. It's a little bit like a CPU in a computer overheating. The entire computer will shut down, but you don't, you don't see the CPU overheating. You don't know the CPU is overheating. It shuts down as a precautionary measure before it sets on fire or it gets worse. So the computer knows it's overheating, but you can't see that because it's inside the computer. So what is going on our head? People can't see the fact that we're like, essentially we're overheating. We. We have enlarged amygdalas. So an amygdala is like the emotional part of, you know, your brain. We, we. We have enlarged amygdalas. And that is because we, we feel too much. We. We over feel, I say, too much. It's is exactly what it is. What we get. It is. It is what it is. And it can be wonderful in some situations, and it can be completely disabling. In others.

[Simon Scott]

Oh, yeah. I mean, I remember many years ago, like, the first, like, girlfriend I ever had, her nana died and she asked me if I would go to the funeral with her. I only ever met her nana once. And I remember being sat in the funeral and everybody being so upset. I just felt it. I felt everything. And I got really upset. And the girl who I was dating's mum turned round and gave me the dirtiest look, as if to be like, you didn't know her. And then she had that conversation with me afterwards. She was like, I thought it was really disrespectful for you to fake cry like that. I was like, oh, oh, all right. And then, like, when my nana died, I was at the funeral and didn't cry at all. And then as soon as I got back from the funeral, I took myself to bed for two days. I just couldn't process at all. And it's like, in the moment, I was just like, oh, yeah, I should be feeling this, and I'm not feeling it. And then about three hours later, it hit me like a freaking tsunami. And then there are moments where I don't think I should be emotional at all. And I'm, you know, bereft. I'm like, you know, weeping. And it's. It frustrates me because I feel like, again, it comes from that sort of RSD way of, you know, perceiving the world is. I'm sort of going, this isn't how I should be reacting in this moment. And it get. Feel. It just feels worse.

[Jordan James]

Yeah, you start overthinking what everyone else is thinking and. Yeah, yeah, it. It's. It's definitely. It's not a fun experience when. When everybody else around you is judging you because you're not behaving in the way they expect you to behave. This is what I've always said, you know, And. And this includes neurodivergent and neurotypical neurodiverse. The world as we know it. Because everybody's different, everybody's going to react differently, everybody's going to feel differently. Everybody's gonna have their own way of expressing emotions and feelings. And I think that it would just be really wonderful if everybody stopped comparing others to themselves or comparing others to others. You know, just let us be individual, Let us experience it how. How we want to. Because there seems to be this. This sort of panic with. With. With parents and teachers when. When they have a kid who is hypersensitive and they're just like, oh, God, what do we do? What do we do. You know, it's like, oh, you know, we can't do this, we can't do that. And this is, this is a problem. This is a problem. This is a problem child because it might be so hypersensitive that they're having meltdowns because the sensitivity around them, it's just too much. They're hypersensitive to everything.

[Simon Scott]

In constant burnout.

[Jordan James]

Yeah, yeah, because it's just being overwhelmed constantly and it's so easy just to blame the child. But as we've said a million times before, it's environment. It's the environment in which you're in and the situation which you're in. And at the end of the day you just gotta deal with it as best you can. We're only ever trying to do the best we can. And if that doesn't measure up to other people's idea of what the best is, then that, that's their problem, that's not mine. I'm just gonna do the best I can. But yeah, should we have one more break and then we can talk about things that we put in place, Reasonable adjustments.

[Simon Scott]

Yes, sir. We will take a short one. We'll be right back. Have you ever felt stuck in patterns that don't serve you, struggled with stress or wanted to connect more deeply with yourself? Then I have to introduce you to a friend of the podcast. Ashley Bentley of integrated coaching, breathwork and hypnotherapy. Ashley is a highly experienced clinical hypnotherapist and coach specializing in working with neurodivergent minds. Through a unique blend of integrative coaching, breathwork and hypnotherapy, Ashley helps people rewire subconscious patterns, regulate their nervous systems, step into more empowered versions of themselves. Whether you're dealing with addiction, anxiety, burnout, or struggles with self acceptance, Ashley offers practical and science backed tools tailored just for you. Her unique methods combine neuroscience, storytelling, subconscious transformation to create real lasting change. Jordan and I can personally attest to the profound and transformative effects of her sessions which have been life changing. She does all of these sessions online, meaning she can work with you no matter where you are in the world. If you're ready to break free from old patterns and start living with more clarity, confidence and connection. Go to Bit ly Ashleynde to book a free consultation or learn more. Welcome back to the Neurodivergent Experience. Simon Scott with Mr. Jordan James. Talking about hypersensitivities and all the fun stuff, Pennywise has joined us on screen as Jordan's little forever companion.

[Jordan James]

It's my stim toy. I've got a squeezy Pennywise.

[Simon Scott]

Yeah. The contradictions. I, I get comfort from a very scary little.

[Jordan James]

It's a scary. And I give them kisses.

[Simon Scott]

But regardless of what I think about it, you know, you're making an accommodation for yourself and reasonable adjustments and what works for you, works for you. And when we've been talking about hypersensitivity, you touched on it in the last section there. You mentioned environment. Now that has been the big, big thing for me in that, as I have learned, I am extremely hypersensitive. I, I came to realize I put myself in the worst possible situations to thrive as a hypersensitive person. And the main one was I used to live in cities and I don't anymore. And I feel a lot better.

[Jordan James]

I, I love living. I, I. Not so much in the countryside. Countryside. Because, you know, it's weird. When I lived in the countryside where I grew up, it wasn't far from. Well, it was about a mile from a farm. But every morning I'd wait. I can smell cow manure. Like, like someone had, had like, dropped it on my face. Like it was so strong. The, the cow manure, dude. But it's. But now I live in a town, but it's a small countryside town. And where, where I am is on the outskirts of the town. So I'm like, right next to like, fields and woodlands, but it's also not that far from a farm. So there's sometimes when I come out of my house here and I can SM manure like someone dropped it on my head. I'm like, I don't live in a village anymore. I'm in a town. I'm still smelling cow poop. Yay.

[Simon Scott]

No, that's fun. Because it's, you know, these little things. It's like I used to live right next to a tram stop in Manchester and the freaking thing would squeak and rattle and screech. It used to do my nutting. And now I live on an estate that's really near Woodlands. And yeah, there's a train line that runs right behind my house. I don't. I barely hear it because of the pitch as well. Yeah, yeah, exactly that. And you know, the sort of contradiction. Tram screechy hate train goes past, barely makes any noise, and it's gone. And it's gone.

[Jordan James]

Yeah.

[Simon Scott]

But the, the sort of, like, changing of environment has been huge. It's like where I work, I work from home. Now that is a choice that I've made because when I'M in offices and there's fluorescent lights and there's phones ringing constantly and there's voices talking over each other. And the canteen food smells like school dinners. That's the only sort of smells that's like trigger me is school dinner smells. And that used to make me operate at like 30 capacity. I look back on like some of the things that I achieved in my working life in environments that I was in, and I'm amazed that I kept my job, let alone did well at it. And now that I work from home and I have a, a lot more control over my environment and the most unexpected thing to happen is my doorbell rings. I feel like I'm operating on a system that has cleaned the cache, got rid of the cookies, removed software it doesn't use. I'm now running a lot more optimally and getting a lot more done that I want to get done. Makes a big, big difference. So what about you? Obviously, you know, you've, you used to sort of like live in the countryside and with the things that you struggle with. But one of the things that I'm interested about when you talk about your sense of smell, airports must be tough because you have to walk through the duty free. You've got no choice about that now. So that must be a bit of a sensory nightmare for you when you're traveling on your photography trips and things like that.

[Jordan James]

No, not weirdly enough that it's not the smell that bothers me because I think, you know, when I was younger it bothered me a lot and as I got older I. It's fine. The worst thing from the reason I can smell the chemicals is I think when I spray something nice on me immediately it smells nice, but it's when it starts breaking down over the course of the day. And that's when I like, when it starts breaking down, that's when I can smell all the individual chemicals. So I tend to put, you know, perfume, whatever it is on, on the back of my neck or on my arms so I can, I still smell nice, but it's not like it's not under, it's not on my neck directly under my nose, you know, not. So it's at the back of my neck so it doesn't go straight up my nose. So I make adjustments so I can still smell nice without having to smell it myself, I guess. But yeah, no, it's the lights. I. When I'm in airports, I, I have to wear sunglasses. Like, I just, I cannot deal with the fluorescent lights. And the, the worst thing for Me is I went when I. When I go shopping, like in Sainsbury's or whatever, and I'll go in there, and I. I can't deal with sunglasses off, so I can't have no sunglasses. But sometimes I put my sunglasses on, and then it's too dark.

[Simon Scott]

Yeah.

[Jordan James]

And I'm just like, I. Yeah, it's so. It's so annoying because I get, like, stuck in between of like, oh, this is too dark. This too light. So I have, like, different sunglasses. But, like, literally, my. My eyes can. Can change the sensitivity. It's not a constant. It's like a spectrum of how I feel at the time as well of how much something's going to bother me, because I think that the sensitivity is remaining the same, but it's. How much it bothers me can alter depending on how tired I am, how upset I am, how busy it is, everywhere. So if I walk into Sainsbury's and it's relatively quiet, or walk into an airport is relatively quiet, you know, I can deal with certain sensitivity to light. But if there's. If there's too many things that are causing me issues. So if there's light, there's sound, if there's smell, if there's all of these things just attacking me all at once, that. That's when I'm like, okay, I need to put my headphones on. I need to put my sunglasses on. I need to, like, literally pinch my nose. Yeah. Or hold my breath. I've had to hold my breath sometimes, weirdly enough, it's when I go to the toilet and my own. My own toilet is too smelly, and I have to hold my breath.

[Simon Scott]

The image of you sat on the loo holding your nostril as you reach for the toilet paper, you let go. You're like.

[Jordan James]

Yeah, that's. That is. That is basically it. It's also like. Like, pee. Like if I've had, like, asparagus or something, and then you pee, and there's that really freaking crazy smell over your own pee. And. And I'm just like, oh, yeah.

[Simon Scott]

Oh, you would. You would hate festivals. Because there was some particular toilets I walked into, and I was like, humans should not be able to make that.

[Jordan James]

Yeah. Def. I've been. I've been in some toilets, you know, at restaurants and stuff like that. And I'm just gonna be like, o. I have to hold my breath while I go to the toilet. Which, yeah, it's. It's not. It's very unpleasant.

[Simon Scott]

The guy's passed out in the toilet. Is he overdosed on drugs? No, he has run out of breath. Yeah, just passed out. Blue on the floor.

[Jordan James]

Oh, man.

[Simon Scott]

No headphones. I know, you know, money is, is a privilege and we all have different financial aspects and stuff, but I invested in a really good pair of noise cancelling headphones that has been a game changer for me. I take them everywhere, absolutely everywhere. Like, there's a certain guy in our gym and Caris, and I call him like Mike because all he does is work on the boxing thing and he's covered in Mike Tyson tattoos and every time he punches them he's going, oh dear.

[Jordan James]

I love people in the gym that make ridiculous noises.

[Simon Scott]

Because my thought process is, is if you're not at a boxing gym, you aren't allowed to go to one of the local boxing gyms. And there's a reason why. That's my bottom up processing. Whenever I see anybody in a gym.

[Jordan James]

That'S boxing, I go being banned for weird.

[Simon Scott]

Why have you been banned from a, from a boxing gym? Why are you here? But I could not work out if I didn't have that. If I, if, if I walked into the gym and there was a guy doing that and I had to have a workout, I would have to leave. I'd have to go and do something else. I just couldn't get through that.

[Jordan James]

So. So you like me? Maybe you also get triggered not, not by the actual frequency of the noise, but by the unnecessary noise.

[Simon Scott]

So, so true.

[Jordan James]

So I, it. And it's more of the fact that it's just annoying because, like, I know they don't need to do that. And it's like the, the guys in the gym, they'll, they'll do deadlifts. And it clearly there's a sign up saying, do not drop the weights. It says don't drop the weight. They come up and they, they drop it from a height. And I'm like, if you can't put it back down, you shouldn't be lifting it up. And it. Great. And it's. And, and it's not only that they lift it up and they go. And then they drop it. And there's, there's also signs up that says do not make unnecessary noises when lifting weights. Because the signs are. And I think it makes it even worse when there's a sign up because I'm like, there's a sign. You just have to follow the rule.

[Simon Scott]

Oh, the justice. We haven't even got into justice sensitivity. Maybe we'll do that another day.

[Jordan James]

Yeah.

[Simon Scott]

You know, you're so. So, right. I. Carris and I went to a WWE event a couple of weeks ago, and the first one that we went to last year, there was a guy in front of us with his kids who was hammered to the point of his kids were like, dad, stop. It was embarrassing. And he kept doing this thing where, like, the matches would happen. And the rhythmic communicating of wrestling. There are certain chants that happen at certain times. This guy was freestyling, and it was doing my head in. Absolutely. Like, you just keep going, this person sucks. Get off this person. Like, it was messing with the rhythm of my expectation of how a wrestling crowd behaves. We went to another event. Who sat in front of us? Jordan. The exact same bloke. And Caris and I sat down, we both looked at each other and went, oh, like, exact same dude. He performed exact the same way. Middle of a match, and he's just going, this person sucks. He's rubbish. Get him off. And I'm like, I'm gonna hurt this man.

[Jordan James]

But is it possible with Ashes Dekalalia.

[Simon Scott]

Exactly. And that's the battle that I'm having in my head.

[Jordan James]

You know, he. He might. He might be neurodivergent.

[Simon Scott]

That's the battle.

[Jordan James]

But then it's triggering your neurodivergence, and then you're doing neurodivergent drop kick in the back of his head.

[Simon Scott]

Yeah. And I'm literally looking at this guy going, I just want to, like, oh, just bop him.

[Jordan James]

Yeah, I. I have that when. When I go and watch a movie and then people are making noises. And I remember watching this is a while ago now, but it's a Casino Royale.

[Simon Scott]

Oh, yeah.

[Jordan James]

So watching the James Bond movie. And then there's a. As a kid, like, three seats down, who just ke. And. And I just. I turned around. I turned around, I was like, can. Can you not. And. And the mum next to me said, mad. He's autistic. He can't help it. And I just went, so why did you bring him here? She's like, we. We can take him wherever he. Like, I'm so okay, but I'm also autistic.

[Simon Scott]

Oh, and your son is so complicated.

[Jordan James]

It's ruining the movie for me. I've paid for the movie. You're not only ruining the movie for me, you're ruining the movie for everyone else around them that can't concentrate on the movie. We've all paid to see the movie. But your son, inadvertently. Not his fault. It's your fault for bringing him. So, yeah, there is that whole. Oh, yeah, she's absolutely within her right to bring her son. But her son was making those noises because he was not happy. She had. Had forced him into this situation. She just had the entitlement of, oh, I. I can. I can, you know, do whatever I like. And, you know, because I also paid and it's like, do you not even think about anyone else? And it is. It is. It's a hard thing to do because it's not like, oh, I don't think that kid should be allowed in the cinema. But at the. The other side of it, it's like, right, but there are special showings for autistic people.

[Simon Scott]

It's the same with theater as well. You know, I've been to. I've worked on theater shows where people just sort of do what they want. It's odd. Like, I've been on a mixing desk before, and people are literally standing up at the back of the theater and singing as if they're on stage. And it's like, people have paid hundreds of pounds to hear them, not you. But then you also have that thing of going, well, maybe it's circle Alia. It's their special interest. They're really happy to be there. I had an experience with Caris. I took her to see Heather's the Musical. There was a girl who was sat behind us who was dressed as the main character, head to toe, same hair color and everything. And she was saying the lines from the show before they were happening.

[Jordan James]

Oh, dude, no. I'll turn around and say, you've got a shot.

[Simon Scott]

And that's.

[Jordan James]

You need to shut up.

[Simon Scott]

That's what my Mrs. Did. And she was like, the mum. The mum was like, oh, yeah, sorry, she can't help it. And then my Mrs. Was like, and I can't help that. It's really annoying me. And I went, but one of us is gonna have to stop. And they do show stops for things like that. I mean, blimey. I was with Karis's family and her nana once. We're watching Jersey Boys and three of them walk on stage, and her nana turns to me and just goes, I thought there was four of them. Oh, God, no. And that's the thing. They're the bits that mess with me is I'm like, we're here to sit in silence and enjoy what we're here to watch. I'm not here for you to be entertained. The entertainment. And then I go through that sort of mental battle of. I go, well, what if it's just echolalia? What if it's this, what if it's that? Am I the dick for feeling bad about what's happening? But then I also have to remember I'm neurodivergent as well. And then I feel like we're just top trumping each other, going, well, I have this. So you have that and you have that.

[Jordan James]

I, I think when it, when it comes to especially like performances, you know, whereas whether it's theater or is it cinema or anything like that, it is literally at this. Would you bring a baby to the cinema? And if you're the sort of person that's like, I will bring my infant baby to the cinema, I'm not a fan of you. I'm, I'm, I'm not a fan. You are a selfish person because babies scream, babies cry, babies have to be taken out, you know, because they're babies. Also, babies are hypersensitive and won't enjoy Mission Impossible. Babies aren't, aren't enjoying the movie. You are bringing that baby simply because you are selfish and you didn't care about anyone else in that cinema. And you went, well, I'm going to go and watch this movie and I'm going to take my infant child there. Whether everybody else likes it or not. It is incredibly, incredibly entitled. It is incredibly selfish to take an infant baby into a cinema to go and watch like an adult movie. And even if it's a kid's movie, it's an infant. It does not understand what's happening. It's not like you're taking a toddler to see Finding Nemo. That's acceptable. When I go and see a kids film and kids make noises, kids, you know, might get up out of the seat and stuff like that. I just, I live with it. Which is why I don't normally go to the cinema to see films under 15s.

[Simon Scott]

I've had to stop, I've had to remove myself from, from doing that.

[Jordan James]

So I, I won't go and see those films because it upsets me. So I keep myself away because I'm like, those kids are kids and they are absolutely entitled to be there. Like they, they are allowed to be there. That's a kid's movie. But if you go and see an adult film, then you want, you want to be able to watch that film unhindered. So yeah, it's, it is a difficult one because this is the thing about being hypersensitive because you know it, every single thing is going to upset a different person in a different way. It's, it's almost like, as well. Like I'll, I'll notice on, on the screen in the cinema, I'll notice like a pixel missing. Oh, a crease, A crease in the corner. And this was even worse. Is that my local Cinema, they do 4D, 3Dx.

[Simon Scott]

Oh, yeah.

[Jordan James]

And we, we went there to watch Jaws. This might be what started my back going in the 4D cinema being thrown around when Jaws is attacking the, the boat. We didn't need a bigger boat.

[Simon Scott]

That fish will follow your soul.

[Jordan James]

So we're, we're watching Jaws and the screen's filthy, so when it's dark you can't see it. But when it's light, you know, when they're on the beach, which is a lot. Because it's Jaws. Because it's Jaws, you can see like the darkening of, like the stains on the screen. And I'm like, this, this. I mean, I, I get cheap tickets because I go through three plus, you.

[Simon Scott]

Know, all the phone networks are available.

[Jordan James]

Yeah, the mobile phone network. And you get, you know, cinema for like three, four quid. So I, I kind of went, well, this didn't really cost me that much. It didn't really bother me. But there's people in there that have paid like 20 pound for a ticket and there's no way that I, I wouldn't be like, I want my money back. In fact, even after we watched, I was like, I want my money back. And Sylvia's like, can we just go home, please? Can we? Because Silva. Oh, this is funny. This is Sylvia all the way. She came out and she went, that was the wrong Jaws. And I went, I'm sorry, what? She goes, no, I, I didn't want to see that Jaws. And then she described the Jaws she wanted. I went, that's Jaws too. And she was, yeah, that's the Jaws I wanted to see. And I'm like, but that, that's not the Jaws we were going to see motion picture. I was like, that's. That's not the Jaws. And she was like, yeah, I know. I don't know why I went and saw this one. And I'm like, so just go and eat your sandwich.

[Simon Scott]

Back to the sandwich.

[Jordan James]

Dude. There was, there was an advert for, for the anniversary of Back to the Future. Oh, yeah, Coming to the cinema. And I'm so excited. And she's went, ah, I don't see, I don't see what, what, why it's so good. I don't, I don't get it. And I'm looking at him like, this is the only time I've ever wanted to maybe divorce you. Oh, she doesn't like about the future. She doesn't like Ghostbusters, and she doesn't think Jaws 1 is better than Jaws 2. Oh, God. This. This. This might be a deal breaker.

[Simon Scott]

You should have got a prenup and gone, what films. Maybe I'll do that when Caris and I get married. Because one of the things that she said to me, because one, like talking about my partner's hypersensitivity, she absolutely hates that I am, like, musically tuned because she'll listen to her song and she'll go, isn't this great? And I'll go, yes. It's in the key of something. And it sounds like these 10 other songs. And then I start singing them, and she goes, you've ruined it for me and everybody involved. Like, sorry. So I've just had to learn to sort of just sit there and go, that sounds like so and so. But no, yeah, the. The hypersensitivities. It's. It's funny how it's not funny. You know, it's like, it. It disables me in so many ways. But then when I actually talk about how it does, I can't help but laugh sometimes. And I think that's what makes it worse.

[Jordan James]

I think sometimes if you don't laugh, you cry. And humor is. Is healing. It is healing. And, yeah, I think that every situation that I come across, well, I'm just like, okay, that. That didn't work out for me, or that was too much for me. It's a learning curve, and it's about adjusting your life as best you can and accepting that disability, accepting that side of the coin and just saying, well, you know, I will avoid those things, even if sometimes they make me happy. It's risk versus reward. You know, I have to be in the right mood or I have to be in the right. Right space or the right environment. And like I said, if I go out in the morning and I watch a sunrise and I can smell the morning, I can smell nature. And I can hear everything. I can hear everything. The wind rustling through the. You know, the leaves and a hedgehog, you know, and a squirrel and bird song, and it's magical. It feels magical. I am. I feel part of nature. Like, this is. I feel when I'm in nature, this is what I was. I was supposed to be. But it's. As soon as I'm around anything man made, you know, outdoors, I felt like this isn't natural. This does not suit me as a human. So maybe I'm. Maybe I'm just a caveman, just forced. Forced to live in. In the suburbs.

[Simon Scott]

Yeah, no, that's. Yeah, I often feel the same way, my friend. And I think it's a good way to wrap up there. You know, I'm interested. How does hypersensitivity, sort of, how do you live with it in your life? Because again, we're all so similar, but we're all so, so different. Such a fascinating insight into the neurodivergent mind today. Who knew all of that was going on? I certainly did. Well, another episode, Jordan. Hopefully when people tune in with us next Thursday, you'll be up and at them and not feeling as in pain as you are. But we have got another hot topic coming tomorrow. So looking forward to having you in the feed with us and catching up on all the neuro spicy news. So as always, wonderful. Thank you for tuning in with us. Take care of yourself, be kind to yourself and be safe nightly.

[Jordan James]

Bye.

[Simon Scott]

Thanks for tuning in to the neurodivergent Experience. We hope today's episode sparked something for you. Whether it's a new idea, a bit of validation, or just a moment of connection, remember new episodes are every week, so be sure to join us us for the next one for more conversations and insights into the neurodivergent experience. If you've enjoyed this podcast, help us grow. You can do that by rating and reviewing this show. Your support makes a huge difference in helping us reach more people who could benefit from these conversations. You can connect with us on social media, find us on Instagram, Facebook, Tick tock. Just search for the neurodivergent experience. Thank you again for listening and until next time, take care of yourself. You're not alone in this journey. Only Boost Mobile Boost Mobile will give you a free year of service. Free year when you buy a new 5G phone.

[Jordan James]

New 5G phone? Enough, but I'm your hype man.

[Simon Scott]

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[Jordan James]

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