The Neurodivergent Experience

Episode: What School Taught Us (That It Shouldn’t Have)
Hosts: Jordan James & Simon Scott
Date: October 15, 2025

Episode Overview

In this deeply personal episode, Jordan James and Simon Scott dive into their formative experiences navigating the school system as neurodivergent individuals. They examine damaging messages, systemic failings, teacher and peer bullying, and how school shaped their self-perception—often in ways it shouldn’t have. The conversation is raw and vulnerable, filled with humor, honesty, and moments of reflection, highlighting the urgent need for genuine change in education.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

The Reality of School for Neurodivergent Kids

• Broad Strokes of Trauma
  Both Jordan and Simon describe school as more traumatic than nurturing, with bullying, misunderstanding, and rigid norms overshadowing any positives.

  • “I miss school so much. I wish that I could go back there, but only so I could punch various teachers in the face.” – Jordan (06:03)
  • “Every single neurodivergent person I speak to…we have absolutely nothing in common except…how we were treated. And 90% of it comes from our time at school.” – Simon (07:12)

• Age and Systemic Differences
  Jordan attended school in the 80s, Simon in the late 90s and 2000s. Despite changes over time, both experienced similar neglect and abuse.

  • Playful banter about Jordan being “so old” highlights the frustrating persistence of these problems (08:21).

Teacher and Peer Bullying

• Corporal Punishment and Humiliation
  Jordan recounts a time when physical discipline, even violence, was normalized.
  • “Because I was disciplined in a very obvious way of being hit and smacked and beaten down. Picking on a tiny child…makes you feel good, doesn’t it, fuckers.” – Jordan (09:00)
  • Simon echoes the emotional violence he suffered, especially from teachers who labeled him disruptive or inadequate rather than understanding underlying needs (12:41).

The Double-Edged Sword of Achievement

• Masking and Burnout
  Jordan excelled academically, but at the cost of immense anxiety and masking:

  • “I burnt myself out so much just trying to stay above everyone else or just keeping up with the other kids in the top class... It was a detriment to my own health.” – Jordan (17:14)

• Process vs. Outcome
  Both faced unfair scrutiny for “how” they arrived at answers, with their unique problem-solving dismissed or penalized.

  • “I can’t show you what just happened in my brain because I don’t understand it. You’re not going to understand...because I don’t even understand it, bro.” – Jordan (19:08)
  • “How does it matter if we get to the same destination?” – Simon (19:18)

Different Trauma Responses

• Fighting vs. Freezing
  Jordan fought back against bullies (becoming “the problem”), while Simon internalized blame and became passive (“rolled over and showed my belly”).
  • “I was always so quiet. But as soon as I started getting bullied…I wasn’t going to survive this if I didn’t fight back…Of course I, that makes me the problem.” – Jordan (09:47)
  • “I just rolled over and showed my belly…and then every time my parents would ever speak to other teachers about this, I wasn’t told I was a problem child…I was told I needed to get a backbone and toughen up.” – Simon (12:41)

Impact of School Transitions

• Instability and Rejection
  Both hosts moved schools frequently, compounding feelings of alienation.
  • Jordan moved 5 times before age 16, often due to unsafe or unsupportive environments, reaching a point of “school refusal” following severe bullying—which he points out is a misnomer, since he loved learning (24:06, 26:21).
  • Simon was rejected by multiple schools, with parents having to “buy” his support needs. Each move reinforced self-blame and a sense that “everything is your fault” (32:40).

Adults Perpetuating Harm

• Teachers as Bullies
  Simon and Jordan discuss teachers who openly humiliated, excluded, and even joined in on student bullying:
  • Simon was told by teachers, “We’re not saying you’re asking for it…but you’re asking for it.” and a teacher explicitly undermined him in front of the class (34:58).
  • Both were excluded from sports teams despite obvious skill, purely due to social exclusion (35:42).

Powerful, Lasting Messages

• Internalized Worthlessness
  Both internalized the belief that adverse things happen because they “deserve it.”

  • “Every time I come up against any adversity, the first thought is, ‘Of course this happens, because you’re you and you deserve it.’” – Simon (39:52)

• Success Despite, Not Because of, School
  Career achievements (Simon starring in school plays, Jordan teaching and advocating) happened in spite of school, not because of it.

  • “Every success that I have is like in spite of them. I’d love to meet those people who said I’d never do anything and say, ‘Check this shit out.’” – Jordan (38:11)

Broader Societal Issues

• Generational Trauma & Social Media
  Both note the issues are now exacerbated by social media and the “example” set by adults online.

  • “Adults bully each other on social media as if they were little kids in the playground…so then their kids are gonna do it.” – Jordan (44:57)

• The Challenge of Change
  Jordan expresses frustration that despite increased awareness and resources, core issues persist.

  • “How are we in the same position where we’re so aware of everything and yet…these problems are still arising?” – Jordan (43:39)
  • Both discuss homeschooling as an alternative, but highlight the privilege required to access it.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Survival and Self-Blame

  • “Everything that went wrong was my fault and I was told that I was too disruptive, I was too much, I didn’t focus enough." – Simon (12:41)
  • “The only thing that changes is the uniform.” – Simon (27:59)

• On Finding Support & Redemption

  • “She [Sylvia] saved me, dude. She came into my life when I was ready to just give up…She’s the greatest person I've ever met in my life. I owe her everything.” – Jordan (28:02)
  • Mutual affirmation:
    • “I love that I can talk about this with you. I love that you care. Like, I love you, dude.” – Jordan (52:05)
    • “You’re like my brother. I don’t have any siblings, but I do. It’s you.” – Simon (52:23)

• On School Lessons

  • “School was where all I learned was that I was a problem and everyone else hated me.” – Jordan (46:14)
  • “I don’t even like acknowledging that I even went to school. It all feels like one big grey blur. But, you know, I feel like we’ve created a genuine safe space for us to talk about our freaking trauma." – Simon (53:18)

• Dark Humor Coping

  • “Suck my balls, Mr. Garrison.” – Jordan (52:52)
  • Simon calls out a teacher who looked like Mr. Garrison in approval (53:11).

Timestamps for Key Segments

• [06:03] – School as trauma and bullying; the problematic “narratives” neurodivergent students are given
• [09:00] – Corporal punishment, lack of support, violence
• [12:41] – Different trauma responses; blame and lack of understanding at home/school
• [17:14] – Burnout and masking; high achievement as survival mechanism
• [19:08] – Invalidation of neurodivergent thinking; “show your working out”
• [24:06] – The pain of multiple school moves, “school refusal,” and the truth behind poor attendance
• [34:58] – Teachers magnifying bullying; exclusion from activities
• [38:11] – Life achievements “in spite of them”
• [43:39] – The ongoing challenge, changes not improving core problems
• [46:14] – Schools teaching “you are the problem”
• [51:03] – The impact on future parenting decisions, fear for next generation
• [52:05—53:18] – Closing affirmations; mutual support; finding spaces to heal

Closing Thoughts

Jordan and Simon close by affirming that while talking about school trauma never gets easier, sharing truth breeds connection and hope. They encourage listeners, especially parents, to advocate for their children—and remind neurodivergent adults that they are far from alone.

“We are successful at what we do. We are great at what we do in life. We’re not perfect. No one is. But we are killing it considering most people put us down and thought we are beyond hope…look at us. We’re doing all right, aren’t we?” – Jordan (54:20), Simon (54:28)

Next episode: Drops next Thursday, continuing the conversation and offering hope and community for neurodivergent listeners and their allies.