The Observable Unknown

Podcast: The Observable Unknown
Host: Dr. Juan Carlos Rey
Episode: Mailbag Installment 11: When Time Will Not Obey
Date: January 20, 2026

Episode Overview

In this intimate mailbag episode, Dr. Juan Carlos Rey responds to a heartfelt letter from a listener named Larry R., who struggles profoundly with time—always late or too early, leading to difficulties in relationships and business. Dr. Rey unpacks the neuroscience behind temporal perception, reframes the moral stigma often attached to "bad timing," and invites listeners to view time not as an external enemy, but as an inner collaborator. The episode weaves together neuroscience, psychology, and personal growth, offering compassion and practical insight for those who feel "out of sync" with time.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Nature of Temporal Perception

• Time is Constructed, Not Simply Measured
  • Dr. Rey opens by reframing our typical understanding of time. Rather than an external, indifferent ruler ("seconds tick, minutes stack, hours advance"), time is an internal, constructed experience.
  • Quote (01:41):

    “Time is not merely measured—it is constructed. Neuroscience has shown that temporal perception arises from distributed systems involving the basal ganglia, the cerebellum, the prefrontal cortex, and the insular regions that track bodily state.”

2. The Neurological Roots of Timing Difficulties

• Temporal Dysregulation Stems from the Brain and Nervous System

  • Struggles with punctuality or synchronizing with expectations are often rooted in how the nervous system regulates time, not in moral failing or laziness.
  • Emotional states deeply affect temporal experience:
    • Anxiety: Living in the future, stuck in anticipation.
    • Depression: Collapse into the past, replaying what’s already happened.
    • Both states disrupt the ability to inhabit the present moment.
  • Quote (03:06):

    “Chronic anxiety and depression are not merely emotional states—they are temporal disorders. An anxious system lives in the future, while a depressed system collapses into the past. Neither can inhabit the present with any ease.”

• Stress and Allostatic Load Disrupt Time Perception

  • Extended threat or stress alters the brain’s predictive processing, making us less accurate at estimating time or sequencing events.
  • Quote (04:00):

    “Prolonged threat states distort predictive processing. The brain becomes less accurate at estimating duration, sequencing events, and allocating effort across time. To put it in plain language, the internal clock loses calibration.”

3. Moral Stigma vs. Neurological Reality

• Time-based struggles are often misinterpreted as disrespect, unreliability, or lack of discipline—instead of being recognized as neurological difficulties.
  • Relationships and business depend on reliable timing and presence. When these go awry due to internal dysregulation, others may judge it as a character flaw rather than a nervous system issue.
• Quote (05:26):

  “When someone cannot reliably synchronize with shared temporal expectations, others have a tendency to interpret this morally as disrespect or avoidance, perhaps as unreliability. But the root is often neurological, not ethical.”

4. The Role of Shame and Vicious Cycles

• Repeated timing failures can introduce shame, which further disrupts the capacity to perceive and predict time, deepening the cycle.
  • Quote (06:10):

    “Over time, shame enters the system. And shame, once ensouled, further disrupts temporal perception. A vicious loop is created.”

5. Authorship and Rewriting the Personal Timeline

• The “real” issue isn’t punctuality, but authorship—who is steering your experience of time? Many live by “clocks” inherited from family, culture, or trauma, not their own inner rhythm.

  • Quote (06:42):

    “Your letter is not really about punctuality. It’s about authorship. Who is steering the timeline of your life, Larry?”

• To “align” internal timing, don’t reach for new planners or lectures on discipline. Instead, study your temporal patterns across biology, psychology, and lived experience.

• The goal: Move from prediction to coherence with time—mapping friction points, windows, and clarity so that time shifts from being adversarial to collaborative.

6. Reauthoring Life: When Time Sabotages

• Dr. Rey suggests that persistent time difficulties may be a sign that your life needs deeper structural revision, not surface-level fixes.
  • Quote (08:00):

    “Larry, when time repeatedly sabotages a life, it’s often because the life is asking to be re-authored at a deeper structural level. You’re not failing at time—time is asking you to listen to it differently.”

Memorable Moments & Listener Invitations

• Dr. Rey gently invites Larry and those with similar struggles to seek understanding, not blame.
• He offers his contact for reflections and questions about time, and mentions his private work on “interdisciplinary forecasting” to help individuals map and tune their inner timing.
  • Quote (09:14):

    “If you feel called to explore how your internal timing might be brought into coherence, I personally offer private interdisciplinary forecasting work… No pressure, no promises, just clarity.”

Important Timestamps

• 00:00: Introduction & Larry’s letter about lifelong struggles with time
• 01:41: Time as a constructed internal experience
• 03:06: How anxiety and depression create “temporal disorders”
• 04:00: Stress distorts predictive processing of time
• 05:26: Moral judgement vs neurological reality
• 06:10: The role of shame and the creation of vicious cycles
• 06:42: Authorship—living according to someone else’s clock
• 08:00: Time sabotaging life and the call to re-author one’s narrative
• 09:14: Dr. Rey’s offer of interdisciplinary forecasting and listener invitations

Summary

This episode is a compassionate, rigorously scientific, and gently mystical exploration of why some people can’t seem to “get time right.” Dr. Juan Carlos Rey powerfully reframes the struggles around punctuality—not as a character defect, but as a sign of deeper neurological and psychological imbalances shaped by life history, emotion, and even inherited patterns. He urges listeners to move beyond shame and instead foster inner coherence, listening for the life that is asking to be re-authored. For anyone who has felt like time is their adversary, this installment offers both solace and a practical call to explore their unique temporal rhythm.