The Prosecutors After Dark: Bed Bugs

Podcast: The Prosecutors
Hosts: Alice and Brett
Date: November 19, 2025
Episode Theme:
A hilarious, chaotic, and very real discussion about hotel disasters—centered on an unforgettable bed bug incident during a girls’ weekend, plus behind-the-scenes stories from Alice’s days working at a motel. While there’s no true crime case this week, Alice and Brett get candid about travel mishaps, hospitality industry antics, and reveal some of their own “statute-of-limitations-expired” scams.

Episode Overview

In this “After Dark” edition, the true crime is the hospitality nightmare itself: bed bugs, double-booked rooms, and the creative solutions (or lack thereof) employed by exhausted hotel staff. Brett recounts a wild Wisconsin weekend marred by bed bugs, while Alice shares “never-before-told” secrets from her motel days—including incentives to upsell customers, wild late-night encounters, and the surprising economics of hotel room rentals.

Detailed Breakdown & Key Insights

1. Government Shutdown & Travel Madness

• [02:00]
  • The episode opens with banter about the ongoing government shutdown. Alice jokes about taking advantage of halted work schedules to travel, courtesy of the taxpayer.
  • Both hosts reflect on how the shutdown affects federal employees’ lives: “People cannot literally work forever without money because they have to actually pay.” — Alice ([02:58])
  • The courts are closing and staff are getting desperate: “Somebody was like, today was like, I'm gonna have to get a second job. And I was like, good thing I already got one.” — Alice ([03:10])

2. Brett’s Hotel Bed Bug Catastrophe in Wisconsin

• [03:36] – [17:20]
  • Brett recounts a recent trip to Door County, Wisconsin for Fall Fest. The trip is meant to be relaxing, but everything goes off the rails when Claire (Brett’s friend) calls with an ominous voicemail: "Bedbugs." — Brett ([08:15])

The Nightmare Unfolds

• Claire stays in their hotel room alone, wakes up at 1 AM “covered head to toe in bites” and discovers live (and dead) bed bugs in both her bed and Brett’s unoccupied bed ([08:18] – [11:12]).
• The hotel is “fully booked” for the popular festival. The only apparent solution: “What if I get you a rollaway bed…?” — Front Desk Clerk (as relayed by Brett) ([08:59])
• The front desk worker loses track of time and gets confused about which guest is in which room. “She opens the door and the poor front desk man is standing listlessly in the middle of the hallway, just turning in 360 circles repeatedly.” — Brett ([09:51])
• The saga gets weirder: The next room has only a Murphy bed, and a closet door opens to reveal a stranger: “Inside she hears someone say, ‘We’re sleeping in here.’” — Brett ([12:15])
• Still sleep-deprived, Claire is shuffled to yet another room—more like staff quarters than a guest room. The beleaguered clerk tries to “make up for it” by offering snacks: “He’s standing there with a can of Pringles and a bag of pistachios from the mini bar and just hands it to her and walks away.” — Brett ([14:01])

Resolution?

• Even after all this, when the manager comes in, things aren’t fully resolved. Claire gets a new room—occupied by someone else, mid-hair curling: “Clearly, the beds have been slept in. Course, there she was very. It was very occupied.” — Brett ([14:47])
• Ultimately, Brett and Claire give up: “We’re gonna drive an hour away because there’s no vacancies. Literally no room at the inn for an hour… And then we left and never went back. But it was the best weekend ever.” — Brett ([17:16])

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “Good thing you stayed in Milwaukee.” — Alice ([08:15])
• “Bedbugs. And I was like, hold up.” — Brett ([08:13])
• “This is like a Mr. Nightmare story.” — Alice ([12:25])
• “You’re about to have your fear unlocked again.” — Brett ([08:29])
• “I’m so glad you had a great time.” — Alice ([17:20]) (delivered with full sarcasm)

3. Alice’s Motel Chronicles: The Business of Hospitality

• [17:30] – [25:51]
  • Alice shares her experience working solo shifts at a local motel as a college student.

Motel Life, Staff Tricks, and Outrageous Stories

• The motel maintained two spare rooms, including a “single bed” staff room, only used in emergencies or on football weekends. The front desk staff dreaded the “nightmare scenario” of double bookings or bed bug discoveries ([18:25] – [19:15]).
• Alice explains the flawed incentive structure: staff bonuses depended on average room rates—not total rooms sold. “If you rented one room for a hundred dollars, that would get you a bonus. Whereas if you rented five at 75, no bonus. Ridiculous. Stupid.” — Alice ([21:04])
• A mini-masterclass in motel negotiation: always ask for the price, or expect to pay too much. “If you came into my hotel and you asked for a room, like, hey, I need a king. I'm like, I got one. Great. Here's my credit card. You got charged like 120 for a room because you didn't ask the price. So I charged you whatever I wanted to.” — Alice ([22:21])

Wild and Gruesome Encounters

• Alice describes sketchy guests, including "ladies of the night" and a particularly unsettling incident: “There's just blood everywhere. Whole room's covered in blood.” — Alice ([24:05])
• When Brett asks how Alice didn’t get fired for that, she answers wryly: “Oh, I was the best employee. My rates were so much higher than everyone else.” — Alice ([24:29])
• Comic relief: Alice admits she ate more raw cookie dough than was ever baked for guests: “I'd eat, like, 30 little circles of cookie dough. I'd make, like, 10. I mean, I just ate that cookie dough like it was going out of style.” ([25:00])

4. Reflections, Community, and Sign-Off

• [25:20] – [28:00]
  • The hosts reflect on tornado warnings, the unpredictability of proper emergencies in hospitality, and how little a front desk clerk can actually do: “We're in a hotel. There's no basement… If the tornado hits this building, we are going to die.” — Alice ([25:44])
  • Metacommentary on episode structure, their favorite listeners, and what their fans mean to them: “You’re our favorite people. The people who listen to these episodes. Our favorite people.” — Alice ([27:10])
  • Debate over what tagline to use, as another YouTuber “kind of stole” their idea. They settle on:
    • “Nothing good happens After Dark.” ([26:48])

Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• “Bedbugs. And I was like, hold up.” — Brett ([08:13])
• “This is like a Mr. Nightmare story.” — Alice ([12:25])
• “Inside she hears someone say, ‘We’re sleeping in here.’” — Brett ([12:19])
• “I’m trying so hard not to ruin your business right now. And I was like, the problem. That is a real problem that may have spread to three rooms.” — Brett ([15:06])
• “Oh, I was the best employee. My rates were so much higher than everyone else.” — Alice ([24:29])
• “If you asked, you got lower [rates]. And so that way my numbers are always way higher than everybody else.” — Alice ([22:41])
• “If the tornado hits this building, we are going to die.” — Alice ([25:44])
• “Nothing good happens After Dark.” — Alice ([26:48])

Key Takeaways & Listener Highlights

• Hospitality Disasters Are Universally Relatable: Even seasoned travelers (and prosecutors!) aren’t immune from nightmarish hotel experiences.
• Inside Hotel Scams and Economics: Always ask for the rate! Staff incentives often work against guests’ best interests.
• Human Side of Hospitality: Whether dealing with bedbugs or tornadoes, front desk staff do what they can—often with humor and snacks.
• Loyal Listeners, Deep Dives: This “After Dark” isn’t about true crime, but about the human comedy behind every supposedly “ordinary” experience.

Timestamps for Key Segments

• 02:00 — Government shutdown effects & travel mishaps.
• 03:36 — Brett’s Wisconsin trip & introduction to the bed bug story.
• 08:15 — “Bedbugs” voicemail revealed.
• 09:51 — Pacing hotel clerk and escalating chaos.
• 12:19 — The Murphy bed room and strangers behind doors.
• 14:01 — Pringles, pistachios, and exhaustion.
• 17:16 — “We left and never went back.”
• 18:25 — Alice’s motel days: staff rooms & “ladies of the night.”
• 21:04 — Motel incentive system and negotiation advice.
• 24:05 — The bloody room and police.
• 25:44 — Tornadoes, cookies, and existential hotel dread.
• 26:48 — Tagline: “Nothing good happens After Dark.”

A must-listen for anyone who travels, works in hospitality, or just enjoys war stories (and survival tips!) from the front lines of American hotels—with classic Alice and Brett honesty and wit.