Loading summary
Karen Guggenheim
This is an iHeart podcast.
LG XBoom Advertiser
Stop settling for weak sound. It's time to level up your game and bring the boom. Hit the town with the ultra durable LG X Boom portable speaker and enjoy vibrant sound wherever you go. Elevate your listening experience to new heights because let's be real, your music deserves it. The future of sound is now with LG X Boom and for a limited time, save 25%@LG.com with code fall25. Bring the boom. Xboom.
Washable Sofas Advertiser
Life'S messy. We're talking spills, stains, pets and kids. But with Anabe, you never have to stress about Messes again. @washablesofas.com Discover Annabe Sofas the only fully machine washable sofas inside and out, starting at just $699. Made with liquid and stain resistant fabrics, that means fewer stains and more peace of mind. Designed for real life, Our sofas feature changeable fabric covers allowing you to refresh your style anytime. Need flexibility? Our modular design lets you rearrange your sofa effortlessly. Perfect for cozy apartments or spacious homes. Plus, they're earth friendly and built to last. That's why over 200,000 happy customers have made the switch. Upgrade your space today. Visit washablesofas.com now and bring home a sofa made for life. That's washablesofas.com offers are subject to change and certain restrictions may apply.
Karen Guggenheim
Every business has an ambition. PayPal open is the platform designed to help you grow into yours with business loans so you can expand and access to hundreds of millions of PayPal customers worldwide. And your customers can pay all the ways they want with PayPal, Venmo, pay later and all major cards so you can focus on scaling up when it's time to get growing. There's one platform for all business PayPal open grow today. Today at PayPalOpen.com loans subject to approval in available locations, Arthur Brooks talks about, you know, happiness is love. And it's true. It's love, you know, and it's. It's love. It's impersonal love. It's romantic love, it's filial love, it's parent love, caregiver love, love for the planet, animals, whatever it is. But it's this, this amazing feeling and significance and largely you feel that with people.
Podcast Host
Welcome to the Psychology Podcast Today. It's great to have Karen Guggenheim on the show. Karen is a pioneer in the global happiness movement, having created the World Happiness Summit. She is also an author and speaker who inspires people about how to grow post trauma and Rebuild a life focused on meaning, purpose, and happiness. In this episode, we discuss her new book, cultivating Overcome Trauma and Positively Transform youm Life. Is it possible to overcome pain by learning to be happy? This is the question Karen Guggenheim asked herself after the sudden death of her husband in 2013. In this episode, we talk about her own personal journey and also how happiness can be learned through small, daily changes that we can all bring more compassion and positively into our days to feel better about ourselves and others and. And to deal with adversity. So, without further ado, I bring you Karen Guggenheim. Karen Guggenheim, it is so amazing to have you on the psychology podcast.
Karen Guggenheim
I'm so excited to be here. Thank you for having me.
Podcast Host
Yeah. I wanted you on the show for a long time.
Karen Guggenheim
Thank you. Yeah, I definitely wanted to be here, and I flew all the way to New York to be here with you.
Podcast Host
Incredible. So honored. So tell me, like, who is Karen Guggenheim? You know, how would you describe yourself?
Karen Guggenheim
Well, I was waiting for you to.
Podcast Host
Tell me that you want others to define your identity.
Karen Guggenheim
No, no, absolutely not. But I feel like it's. I have, of course, my identity, but in the last 11 years, it's. It's really changed some of it through my willful action and then some just because of the events that happen in my life. So my identity has shifted a little bit from, you know, wife and to. To widow, for example. So that was a shift in identity. But at the core, I think who I am is definitely, I'm a mom, I'm a friend, I'm a daughter, I'm a sister. I think if I can say I'm a visionary, I feel like I'm a catalyst as well. So I've taken pain and tried to do something that is helpful and beneficial and good, and that's who I am.
Podcast Host
Amazing. At what point in the story of your life did you get interested in happiness?
Karen Guggenheim
After my life broke.
Podcast Host
When was that?
Karen Guggenheim
So about. So 11 years ago, my husband died suddenly from the flu.
Podcast Host
And.
Karen Guggenheim
Yeah. And I was married to him half my life, literally. And so, so much of me was tied to this relationship and to this person because we had a really good, strong marriage and friendship. We were very, very good friends. And he really got me, and I got him. And so it was a very. It was a very welcoming relationship and a relationship of belonging and, you know, romance, whatever. But the most important part, it was that I could be totally myself with this person and not feel judged and just feel home. And when that ended, my first inclination was to shut off to the World, make the room really cold, get into my bed, put down the blinders and just lay there, right? And then I remembered I had children. And so I knew that I had to show up for them. And so I decided to live. And that meant that I was going to become an active participant in my life. And to me, that meant that my purpose was going to be happiness and I was going to get to happiness. And I didn't know how. I didn't know definitely about the scientific definition of happiness or well being. I just intuitively knew that for me, survival meant that I had to, like, overshoot it. It had to be so great and so wonderful that I'd want to live in that life. And the first step I knew to go into that life was to feel the pain. Because when you are in shock or in loss, there's shock first. So the pain is not immediate. And there's kind of like that decision of, am I going to avoid it? Am I going to use any kind of tricks and to get away from it? But since I knew that I wanted to go to happiness, of course I've realized since then, it's inside. You don't go out, you go in. But the first step was to feel that pain.
Podcast Host
Yes.
Karen Guggenheim
And so I embraced the pain. I didn't wallow in it, but I embraced it. And four months after he died, I was getting an MBA at Georgetown University because I knew that I had to retrain, you know, my career.
Washable Sofas Advertiser
And.
Karen Guggenheim
And so. And I wanted to be with people. It was very important for me to be with. I didn't want to be with people, but I knew that where, for where I was going, I needed to see people. So I began to travel every other weekend and to Washington. And so accidentally, I became happy again.
Podcast Host
Wow. What were you. What was your job before? 11 years ago?
Karen Guggenheim
So international crisis management communicator. I was a former journalist, so I've always been one of the I ams. Who am I? My identity. I'm a storyteller. So I've been a storyteller all my life. And so in a way, my work now is a different kind of storytelling. I'm storytelling happiness.
Podcast Host
Where were you born?
Karen Guggenheim
Nicaragua. I was born in Managua, Nicaragua.
Podcast Host
I like the way you said that.
Karen Guggenheim
Yes.
Podcast Host
Okay.
Karen Guggenheim
Yes.
Podcast Host
Wow. And you were. When did you come to America?
Karen Guggenheim
Well, the first. I always came, you know, back and forth because my mom was actually born in la, my father's German, so we are an international family.
Podcast Host
Oh, okay.
Karen Guggenheim
Yeah. But to live really was when I think it was it was seventh grade, maybe. Yeah. Wow.
Podcast Host
So you've had quite an interesting life so far.
Karen Guggenheim
It's been interesting.
Podcast Host
It's been a journey.
Karen Guggenheim
It's been a journey. Yeah.
Podcast Host
And you've kind of. And where you're at now is on happiness. Why do you think happiness is so important compared to other things you could have focused on like achievement or even self actualization? Why happiness?
Karen Guggenheim
Because happiness is something that you feel in your gut. Right. And so I believe that when you narrow it down, we do. We do things because we want to be happier, because we want others to be happy that we care about. Right. And so a self actualization and self awareness and all these other things I think are components for us to become happier. Right. And so I. I just believe that happiness is incredibly important when we define it in the correct way. Right. That it's not just pleasure.
Podcast Host
Define it for me.
Karen Guggenheim
So, you know, it's funny because my definition largely came from a conversation with Robert Biswas Diener.
Podcast Host
I love him.
Karen Guggenheim
He's wonderful.
Podcast Host
Yeah, he's one of my mentors.
Karen Guggenheim
Yeah, he's great. He's just so wonderful. And he said happiness has a cognitive component and an emotional component and it's universal that it feels good. The other thing that I got from Richard Lyard is that the happiness shouldn't hurt other people. Right. Your pursuit of your happiness shouldn't be.
Podcast Host
I really like that point.
Karen Guggenheim
Yes. Which is important. Right.
Podcast Host
Or even yourself.
Karen Guggenheim
Exactly. Not to hurt others or yourself. And. And then what I love the most though is the cognitive component. Right. And that's where I guess achievement and purpose and meaning, significance, mindfulness, and then the ways of being, of being kind and compassionate and being altruistic. And all of these things are the ones, the components of happiness and relationships in particular that you can do something about. And that way you can construct your happiness in a way because as you do that, then you're hedging for more moments of positive emotion. So it's not that it's linear positive emotion, but emotion. But it's the trend towards. So for me, happiness is that. That line, that trend that is towards more positive emotion. Understanding that you know the totality of human experience is going to bring you to those low moments. But perhaps when you learn these frameworks, you don't go as slow as you would have or stay there as long as you would have if you wouldn't be practicing these habits.
Podcast Host
I want to just say the name of your book and I'll show it for those looking as well. Cultivating happiness, Overcome Trauma and positively transform your life. I think maybe some people would not expect that subtitle right after that title. And so it's surprising and it's interesting. I want to double click on the word trauma for a second. I feel like the word trauma is overused these days. Everything is now trauma, like back pain is like, okay, that's trauma. Or if someone says you didn't get.
Karen Guggenheim
What you wanted, it's a trauma.
Podcast Host
Yes. If someone doesn't or you don't agree, even you don't agree with someone politically or whatever, it's like, don't traumatize me by telling me your beliefs that are different than mine. How do you define trauma? I asked you to define happiness. These are very weighty questions. Now. Can you define trauma?
Karen Guggenheim
I don't think I can. I can define my experience with it. And I have come to realize that answer that you can't define loss. You can't define trauma in a way because what is traumatic to you may not be to me. Right. And so what I can say with my experience in trauma is to have an experience which Shakespeare. The foundation maybe of your life, of your identity, of your future. I. I feel that, you know, when I was in that room and my husband was dying, because I was there when. When he was dying, you know, it was like code. It's code blue. It wasn't code red. I was expecting code red. It's really code blue. And you have all the doctors working on him and all that stuff. And the hyper reality of the moment, I never understood, you know, like, this is another thing. It's life or death that you're here. It's life or death. If you do that, when you've seen death, you understand what death is. And when we talk about life or death, it's not that. You know, and I was guilty of doing that too. Like, it's not. When you are in that moment, oh, this is what we're talking about. When I had to call my kids and tell them their father had died. That's real. That's trauma. That's a moment in time that shakes your entire. Can't even imagine your entire, you know, humanity.
Podcast Host
Yeah.
Karen Guggenheim
And so for me, that was a really traumatic experience. And then, you know, making that choice to grow from the experience was like the most amazing thing ever. And so grateful that I was able to do that. How I was able to do that, I don't know. So for me, I feel. And I have a spiritual life. Right. I'm not very. I'm not religious, but I do have a spiritual life and I feel that something greater than myself supported me in that moment because my reaction was not like a natural reaction to what occurred.
Podcast Host
Oh, that's interesting. Or what if. What if alternatively a different side of yourself came out that was always within.
Karen Guggenheim
You, possibly, but it was not natural.
Podcast Host
Yeah, whatever. It was everyday consciousness. No, I get it, I get it.
Karen Guggenheim
As, as, as he was dying and I, I kind of blocked this out, but my sister was also there. She said that I started, I started. I tapped into gratitude immediately as he's dying, I was grateful to him as the father. She's dying and I'm telling him, I'm so grateful to you, you know, you're such a great dad, you're a great husband, you know, it's okay, don't worry about it. I got it. You know, And. And so it was like a really not. The nurses and the doctors were looking at me like, this lady's insane. But that's how I could live through the moment, you know?
Podcast Host
Of course. And. Well, you bring a lot of this into your book. I just started, you know, kind of where your book starts off, which is really viewing pain and loss as catalysts for change. So you see a real great benefit to think of, think of really hard life challenges in that way.
Karen Guggenheim
Yeah, well, there's nothing you can do about it. Right. Some things you can do, you can't. Like.
Podcast Host
Yeah. As Irving Yalam says, sooner or later you have to give up all hope for a better past.
Karen Guggenheim
Exactly. And Fred Luskin talks about that too, at the summit, the World Happiness Summit. And it's true, you know, but what I also learned, I learned so many different things. And one of the things that is so important to realize is that when you let go of the pain, and it takes a while because you need to have the tincture of time to heal some of it. But when you're willing to let go of the pain, and sometimes when we've lost something, we hold onto the pain because we're afraid that if we let go, we're going to forget the person. But what I have experienced in letting go of the pain is the love has grown. So obviously not romantic love, because my husband's is not here, but I can remember conversations. I can remember moments that make me feel so loved even today, that I didn't have access to when I was just feeling the pain.
Podcast Host
Something else, another part of deep, deep reservoirs of strength were within you. Yeah, that. I mean, it's. It's interesting how we want to think about that, but, you know, whether it's something outside yourself or it's. Whether it's something that was hidden inside yourself, you know, I'm not sure.
Karen Guggenheim
You know, I grew up in a third world country, so I saw a lot of pain.
Podcast Host
Yeah.
Karen Guggenheim
But I saw a lot of happiness and I saw a lot of joy in the midst of people who really, really poor in like really unfair situations. And so there was a grit and a resilience and not avoiding and saying, okay, well our life is, is. Is great. And, and there's something about the Nicaraguan people because they can make fun or not fun, but bring laughter into a really challenging situation. And accepting the situation is challenging.
Podcast Host
Yeah. Well, humor, I think, is one of the most underrated tools in the psychotherapy slash coaching toolkit, so. I agree. Especially absurdist humor, you know?
Karen Guggenheim
Yeah.
Podcast Host
I mean, it's. Everything is so absurd. Like, I bet your. Your life here. But even just here in New York, traveling here was absurd. Like watching. And then everything, you know, everywhere you go in New York, there's like some catastrophe, Right?
Karen Guggenheim
Yeah.
Podcast Host
It's amazing. You also talk about neuroplasticity and connecting with purpose under times of distress. It sounds like you went through both when your husband passed. Is that right?
Karen Guggenheim
Yes. So I rewired my brain completely. Like I'm not naturally joyful person or really once.
Podcast Host
That's part of your temperament?
Karen Guggenheim
No, I was, you know, I wasn't a glass half full person.
Podcast Host
Really.
Karen Guggenheim
No. And none of this came natural to me. I was always. I was. Since a little kid, I've been courageous and perseverance. So I used those strengths to. And then analytical. So first I sliced it. Well, I'm going to live because I'm going to be a good mom. Like being a mom is super important to me. And so for that to happen, I need to do these things. And I made the commitment. And that's something else that I think is, you know, we're living in a time I think it's so important to build resilience and to build resilient kids. And I agree. And we need to be committed to, I think, you know, to be committed to certain things and in certain ways of being. And so one of the things that I learned is that we have a to do list, Right? Every day we have a to do list. But what about a to be list? Do you. What do you want to be today? You want to be kind? You want to be nice? You want to be altruistic, you want to be forgiving? You get to control that and when you do that, you know, the experience of life for me at least softens and then I'm able to. Okay, that's disappointing. But then I got like 27 other things were pretty cool. So it's I used to be focused on thing I didn't get instead of the 27 wonderful things I got.
Podcast Host
Or even like the one person who criticizes you over all the people that.
Karen Guggenheim
Love you and then you call everybody.
Podcast Host
Yeah and you what you want them to sympathize with you?
Karen Guggenheim
Absolutely agree. And somebody will be like, oh, but I heard they compliment no, no, let's not talk about that. I need to talk to you. You know.
LG XBoom Advertiser
Stop settling for weak sound. It's time to level up your game and bring the boom. Hit the town with the ultra durable LG XBoom portable speaker and enjoy vibrant sound wherever you go. Elevate your listening experience to new heights because let's be real, your music deserves it. The future of sound is now with LG XBoom and for a limited time, save 25%@LG.com with code Fall25. Bring the boom X boom.
Washable Sofas Advertiser
Let's be real. Life happens. Kids spill, pets shed and accidents are inevitable. Find a sofa that can keep up@washablesofas.com Starting at just $699, our sofas are fully machine washable inside and out so you can say goodbye to stains and hello to worry free living. Made with liquid and stain resistant fabrics, they're kid proof, pet friendly and built for everyday life. Plus changeable fabric covers let you refresh your sofa whenever you want. Neat flexibility. Our modular design lets you rearrange your sofa anytime to fit your space whether it's a growing family room or a cozy apartment. Plus their earth friendly and trusted by over 200,000 happy customers. It's time to upgrade to a stress free mess proof sofa. Visit washablesofas.com today and save that's washablesofas.com offers are subject to change and certain restrictions may apply.
GoDaddy Advertiser
Running a business online look legit and own your own brand with professional tools from GoDaddy. Instantly build trust with your customers and boost your credibility with an email that matches your domain so people know you mean business. There's never been a better time. Just go to GoDaddy.com GDnow and choose from a wide variety of popular domains to find one that's right for you. Pair that with a professional email that works for all your business needs from daily communications to email marketing and everything in between. That's a little price for a lot of credibility. For a limited time, get a domain and matching professional email for just 99 cents a month for one year. Go to GoDaddy.comGdNow and look legit with GoDaddy. That's GoDaddy.comGdNow again. GoDaddy.comGdNow there's never been a better time to choose the domain and email that's right for you. New customer purchases only products Auto renew separately. See terms on site godaddy.com gdnow.
Podcast Host
Wow, you really think you fundamentally, like transformed 11 years ago. I mean, that's incredible. Incredible. You know, your book could have also been about transformation. Your book could have been about a lot of things.
Karen Guggenheim
No, it is, it is about a total. It is about a transformation, I'm saying.
Podcast Host
I guess that could have been one of the words in the title as well.
Karen Guggenheim
You're right, you're right. But you know, in essence, when he died, I was transformed immediately into, into wife. Yeah, immediately. No, no, no wife. You know, like, and then our family structure, we went from four to three and as having a partner in raising children, no more. So you, like, who do you ask? Something that, you know, I talk about is that I felt like I was born again in. Not in the born again, I saw Jesus type, but born again in that this is a new reality. This is a new identity. I don't know what I'm supposed to be doing. And I have very adult responsibilities because I'm responsible for, exclusively for my kids in our life. And I'm feeling completely lost, you know.
Podcast Host
Yeah, yeah. I mean, there's no, there's no set timetable for grief. You know, some people don't show post traumatic growth, you know.
Karen Guggenheim
Yes.
Podcast Host
And what would you say are some of the biggest, biggest things people can do if they want to kind of accelerate that growth process?
Karen Guggenheim
Well, the very first thing I want to tell everybody who's listening is that it's possible. So just by opening that window into your. The possibilities of your life.
Podcast Host
Yeah.
Karen Guggenheim
And it doesn't matter if you don't know how. It doesn't matter if it looks super bleak, because it does. And you know, but the possibility that it can happen will hedge you towards it possibly happening and, you know, being patient and loving with yourself. And some of the things that I did, for example, I remember that my nephew had given me the Christmas before a T shirt. And it said I am happiness. And I wore the T shirt after my husband died, not because I was happy, but I figured if we wear a shirt for a team, we follow because we're like fans and we support that team or what they're about. So I said, I'm going to wear the happiness shirt because this is where I'd like to be.
Podcast Host
Yeah. Behavioral activation. Let the cognitions follow the behavior.
Karen Guggenheim
And then the other thing, I started copying what happy people do.
Podcast Host
How do you know who or who are happy people? Like, how do you know that?
Karen Guggenheim
Well, I saw them. They look joyful, they look engaged in life. They look like they wanted to do things. So that's not hahaha. But like, oh, you know, they have energy.
Podcast Host
I see.
Karen Guggenheim
So they're creative. And so that to me was like, okay, that looks like something that could be happiness. Right. And. And so that meant, you know, saying yes eventually to go and have lunch with the group. So I was, I told you I was doing my MBA. And so I would fly into Washington D.C. and I would originally fly in for the, for the classes and fly out immediately. Like, the classes over. I head to the airport and come back because my younger son was still in high school in Miami. And then I started staying and leaving on Sunday. So then I would go to dinner with the group. And I remember one year out after his. His death. And there are two things about that. One is it's funny that you think it's like, okay, you've passed the first anniversary, the first Christmas, the first New Year's, the first Father's Day, first birthday. And then it's like, okay, now it's not going to hurt because I've done the first one. And when you realize first year, day one, that it still hurts, it's almost as impacting as the original loss because you realize it's a forever deal in one way or the other. So acceptance on that and letting go. Right. And the other thing I remember, I was at lunch with a group of friends and somebody said something really funny and I'm analyzing. I'm like, ooh, that was funny. And I go, can I laugh? Is it appropriate? For how long can. It's been a year, but is it enough? A year should be a year and a half. And I had this whole internal conversation, and then the same way that we talked, talk about, you know, toxic positivity.
Podcast Host
Yeah.
Karen Guggenheim
Like, you also shouldn't block the fact that if you're joyful in a moment, that that's okay. Right. Also. And so I was like, okay, I'm gonna laugh, I'm gonna laugh. And I laughed. And that was like the snowballing Effect of what other things were to come that I said yes to because I allow. I allowed myself to feel all my feelings.
Podcast Host
Yeah. Permission to laugh? That'd be another book permission.
Karen Guggenheim
Absolutely.
Podcast Host
I love that.
Karen Guggenheim
Because we have labels, right. And for me, when I heard the word widow.
Podcast Host
Yeah.
Karen Guggenheim
For some reason, till this day, I think of, like, the Godfather or an old Italian movie where now you've. Your hair's cut off, your. Your. You went to the nunnery or whatever. You're wearing black for the rest of your life. And that's why I'm wearing pink pants. You know, I love the pants. Thank you. It's. It's. It's these labels. And I, you know, till this day, when you sign, you're. You're filling out paperwork, like to go to the doctor. It says single, married, or widow. Why can I just be single? Why. Why do I have to, you know, go to that moment again as widow? And. And those are things that perhaps we can do away with. But you're only aware of it if you're in that category. But those words mean a lot. And so I don't feel like in my identity that I am a widow. I think there's something that happened, that widowhood is part of it, but something else that I learned from Mogadot, who's. Who's really great. He wrote a book called Sulfur Happy and many other books, but we connected really closely because he sadly lost his son tragically from an emergency appendectomy and then dedicated his life to promoting happiness at scale, whatever. And he said that his son's name was Ali. And so Ali lived and Ali died. And he chooses to focus. Equally true. He focuses on the part that he lived. And so for me, I choose to do the same instead of getting stuck in the bit that my husband died, and he died young and, you know, unfortunately from the flus, which, you know, still boggles my mind, I choose to focus on the part that he lived. And the work that I do, you know, with the World Happiness Summit is bringing legacy to the kind of person that he was, incredibly kind. He was a scientist, he was a physician. And so all of those components come up in my work, and it makes me feel joyful and also gives me a lot of meaning and purpose to bring that way of being that he was in the work that I do today.
Podcast Host
Beautiful. Let's move on to the part of your book where you talk about the importance of movement and breathing. Very undervalued things in our society with everyone so focusing on their work. Right. And not, not. So tell me a little about the importance of these, these, these exercises.
Karen Guggenheim
So thankfully I had been doing Yoga for about 15 years. So the power of the conscious breath and actually that got me through the moment of him dying. I just went into breathing, conscious breathing, because I could have easily fainted. But I went again. What do I control in this situation where I can told I can control my breath because everything was out of control. And so I tapped into the breathing and I think that's something that we, we, we. We have always. Not I think, but we, we actually have always within our control, our breath in any given circumstance. So if you're, you know, like for a panic attack or you're getting news that are really challenging, there's a layoff, you know, your, your love life that you didn't get the answer you wanted, etc. You can go into, into conscious breathing and then that has all the reactions that are happening, you know, biologically through your body that then is bringing you into coherence, which is really amazing. And then the other part about movement, so I see that into physical movement, but also mental movement, not get stuck. And you know, we all know about the growth versus the fixed mindset. And so for me that movement is so important to go into the growth and then moving your body, you know, again, letting biology do its bit. So where if you listen to music or, or you move with dance, then you're bypassing cognition, you're letting biology help you out into, into going towards greater happiness or, or well being or releasing stress.
Podcast Host
Wow, wonderful. Any particular people you followed that helped you the most with learning breathing techniques? Any shout outs you want to give?
Karen Guggenheim
Oh my goodness. So I had my yoga instructor in Miami who helped me out a lot.
Podcast Host
What's their name?
Karen Guggenheim
It's her actually. Veronica Vidal. She's my yoga instructor. And then I became certified. That was before my husband died, but that helped me a lot.
Podcast Host
Oh, you got certified?
Karen Guggenheim
Yeah. Yeah.
Podcast Host
Beautiful. So you had a new appreciation of life right after this. And, and so what, what kind of message you want to give people who are, are desperately trying to find any meaning in their life anymore.
Karen Guggenheim
So, you know, I mean, sometimes I can also say that I sympathize with whoever's going through a lot of anxiety because I have anxiety, so it's something that I deal with. You know, it's. Sometimes it's really hard because you get into this, you know, spiral.
Podcast Host
Yeah, we all have our loops.
Karen Guggenheim
We went to the loop and see how you can break the loop. And that means Putting in rituals that you commit to. So, for example, I commit every morning to reading and journaling and meditating. And whichever way you meditate, you know, whatever it is that. Whether it's prayer or it's, you know, mindfulness practice or whatever it is, breathing techniques, those are kind of hacks into the spiraling. And I go for a walk almost every morning for about four miles.
Podcast Host
Wow.
Karen Guggenheim
So that helps me a lot to be out in nature and to experience that. I listen to music when I'm taking a shower, so that helps me reset as well. I don't listen to news. So, for example, you get a lot of people like, oh, my God, news are stressing me out. Don't listen to it. And if you really need to do it in the middle of the day when your brain is not that susceptible, so don't do it first day, first thing in the morning, or last thing at night. You're not imprinting good things into your brain.
Podcast Host
Yes, yes.
Karen Guggenheim
And that helps out. But, you know, if you want to tap into meaning, investigate it. You know, before this happened in my life, I feel like I was sitting back, sitting on the bus bench with my purse, waiting for the happiness bus to come. And it had to be yellow, and it had to be a certain way and had to be on this street and, like, almost hit me with it. And when he died, it was like that park bench, like, blew up. And I had to look if the. The bus was around the corner. Maybe it was actually a. A motorcycle, and it was red. So I had to go and be active into finding the purpose in my life, into finding meaning, into creating all these different things. And so it's hard when you're feeling down because you stop moving, right? You stop moving. So it's. So just go walk around the block of your, like, one block. It doesn't matter. It's like three minutes.
Podcast Host
Yeah.
Karen Guggenheim
And. And we think we have to do these gigantic things, but you don't. You just have to do a little tiny thing. And if you're feeling down, call somebody and offer help on principle. Not because you want to do it, but you do it because you at least test how you feel afterwards that you've done that. And if you feel good, do it again.
LG XBoom Advertiser
Stop settling for weak sound. It's time to level up your game and bring the boom. Hit the town with the ultra durable LG X Boom portable speaker and enjoy vibrant sound wherever you go. Elevate your listening experience to new heights, because, let's be real, your music deserves it. The future of sound is now with LG XBoom and for a limited time, save 25% at LG.com with code Fall25. Bring the Boom XBoom.
Washable Sofas Advertiser
Life's messy. We're talking spills, stains, pets and kids. But with Annabe, you never have to stress about messes again. At WashablesOfAs.com, discover Annabe sofas, the only fully machine washable sofas inside and out, starting at just $699. Made with liquid and stain resistant fabrics, that means fewer stains and more peace of mind. Designed for real life, our sofas feature changeable fabric covers allowing you to refresh your style anytime. Need flexibility? Our modular design lets you rearrange your sofa effortlessly. Perfect for cozy apartments or spacious homes. Plus, they're earth friendly and built to last. That's why over 200,000 happy customers have made the switch. Upgrade your space today. Visit washablesofas.com now and bring home a sofa made for life. That's washablesofas.com offers are subject to change and certain restrictions may apply.
GoDaddy Advertiser
Running a business online look legit and own your own brand with professional tools from GoDaddy instantly build trust with your customers and boost your credibility with an email that matches your domain so people know you mean business. There's never been a better time. Just go to GoDaddy.com GDnow and choose from a wide variety of popular domains to find one that's right for you. Pair that with a professional email that works for all your business needs, from daily communications to email marketing and everything in between. That's a little price for a lot of credibility. For a limited time, get a domain and matching professional email for just 99 cents a month for one year. Go to GoDaddy.comGdNow and look legit with GoDaddy. That's GoDaddy.comGdNow now again, GoDaddy.comGdNow there's never been a better time to choose the domain and email that's right for you. New customer purchases only products auto renew separately. See terms on site godaddy.com gdnow.
Podcast Host
People also tend to think that you have to do everything for some other reason. I like how you say we can savor just for the sake of savoring, you know. And Abraham Maslow called them the be values, things that are values in and of themselves. We don't try to get anything else other than those things are ends in themselves. That takes a shift of consciousness, doesn't allow yourself to do things just for the sake of the thing itself.
Karen Guggenheim
Absolutely, absolutely. You know, at the end of the day, you have to have this conversation with yourself and how do you want to mostly feel in your life? And if you mostly want to feel better or have more meaning, invest in that, invest time. And it requires time and it requires attention, it requires repetition and it requires which is the speaker or which is the framework or which is the program that resonates for me or which are the practices that worked for me and start to maybe journal and see which are the, you know, routines that start to make you feel better and which ones don't stop doing the ones that don't make you feel better and start doing the ones. And it's not about avoiding responsibility or avoiding problems in your life. Believe me, I've had to tackle so many and now as an entrepreneur, it's not easy being an entrepreneur.
Podcast Host
That's true.
Karen Guggenheim
But, but then I have that conversation, right? Do I, do I want to, you know, put on the World Happiness Summit? Do I want to work, do I want to work in, in a large organization or do I want to be self employed? And so when you go into. Yes, that's what I'd like. So then it's part of the process, you know.
Podcast Host
What is the World Happiness Summit?
Karen Guggenheim
The World Happiness Summit is this most amazing, amazing event that takes place every March and in the same location. No, it travels around. It brings together the world's leading experts in the science of happiness and well being with a global audience. And it's the experts and practitioners who are bringing this work into organizations, educational environments, business, businesses. And how can we learn tools, evidence based tools for a happier life. You know, individuals, collective well being, like I said, workplaces, schools, etc. And last year was in Lake Como, this year was in London. And we were very honored to have the US Surgeon General, Dr. Vivek Murthy there.
Podcast Host
Yeah, I know him.
Karen Guggenheim
We also launched our World well Being Policy Forum with Professor Lord lyard at London School of Economics. And that is, and Dr. Murthy was there as well. That is our initiative to bring this into country policy and also education and business because we need the private sector in order to make this change at scale.
Podcast Host
Absolutely.
Karen Guggenheim
And in the next conference in March in Miami. So I hope all of you will be there because it's going to be amazing. It's going to be in Miami beach at the new World Center.
Podcast Host
Oh, wow. You live in Florida, right?
Karen Guggenheim
I live in Miami.
Podcast Host
Oh, you live in Nickisso. This is your hometown. Wonderful. When did you start this conference?
Karen Guggenheim
I found Wahasu in 2016, and then four, no, five months later, we had the first World happiness summit in 2017.
Podcast Host
Look at you. We're doing this for so long, and it's become a staple of the happiness summits. Yeah. Very nice. You've become a rising legend in the field of happiness studies.
Karen Guggenheim
I'm very happy to be able to share.
Podcast Host
Yeah.
Karen Guggenheim
What I have learned and to share work, you know, like your work, and the work of others who have dedicated their lives to. To really bringing evidence and research into it. Because we know this intuitively and we've been talking about this for, what, thousands of years, and human happiness.
Podcast Host
Yeah.
Karen Guggenheim
Right. And. And I love the fact that we have the science to support what we know intuitively, and we know that it's the right thing to do. But now we have the metrics to also support that.
Podcast Host
Agreed. No lies detected there. No lies detected. So I want to return to your book. I captured the moment when you said the World Happiness Summit. So we took a little detour there. But I'm glad that we were able to talk about the world happiness. Let's return to your book for a second. Relationships. Because you have a whole really cool section on relationships. What does it take to have a happy relationship?
Karen Guggenheim
It takes awareness, decision making. I love the Powelskis. They talk about positive relations.
Podcast Host
Yes.
Karen Guggenheim
The positive relationships.
Podcast Host
Hi, Susie.
Karen Guggenheim
I love it when they talk about. When you ask your spouse or your partner to go to the supermarket and you ask for 10 items and they bring back nine, don't focus on the one they left out, which we tend to do. Right. That will go a long way in your relationship, making, you know, focus on. On everything that's working well and then address what's not. But perhaps through a constructive lens, you know, and really understand that we are our relationships. I mean, we're. We, you know, we're nothing without people.
Podcast Host
Yes.
Karen Guggenheim
You know, we. We need people. We enjoy people. I think the meaning and the reflection is in people. And so investing the best of our time is also important. Right. It shouldn't be scraps of our time with the most important people in our. In our world. Because in our world, in our. In our lives, we tend to do that sometimes. And they love us. It's okay, you know, and that's. That's not fair to you and to them. Because it's so magical to have people in your life who love. Like. Love is the most amazing thing. Like Arthur Brooks talks about, you know, happiness is love, and it's true. It's love, you know, and it's. It's love. It's impersonal love, it's romantic love, it's filial love, it's parent love, caregiver love, love for the planet, animals, whatever it is. But it's this, this amazing feeling and significance. And largely you feel that with people?
Podcast Host
Yeah, for sure. Or animals sometimes.
Karen Guggenheim
Absolutely.
Podcast Host
I felt that with your dog.
Karen Guggenheim
Yes.
Podcast Host
Adorable. And I'm sorry to hear they're stressed a little bit. You said they were stressed a little bit.
Karen Guggenheim
He was a little stressed. I'm really sorry we spoil him, though.
Podcast Host
You spoil him? Yeah. Okay. There's a chapter I really like in your book on forgiveness. Can you talk a little about why forgiveness is so important in relationships?
Karen Guggenheim
I love forgiveness. And we talked about earlier, Fred Luskin out of Stanford. He's spoken at, except for the first one at every summit, and he usually ends the conference because it's the hardest thing in the happiness study is forgiveness. And you know, for obvious reasons, because usually when forgiveness is involved is because we feel an injury and that's emotional and a lot of other things tied into it. But it's such an important, important thing if you want to be happier because it. You allow fertile ground for your happiness to thrive. Right. And that doesn't mean that what happened is okay. And some things will never, ever be okay. And you don't even have to forgive the person, you know, verbally, or they may not even be aware. You just have to really forgive in your heart, in your mind. But it's just the most amazing thing. And then, of course, if you are, you know, forgiveness of friends and, you know, misunderstandings in the day to day are also really conducive to positive relationships. But forgiving things that were done, you know, initially I didn't want to forgive the doctors who make the mistakes that caused my husband's death. That was hard to forgive.
Podcast Host
Really hard.
Karen Guggenheim
Yeah, it was really hard. Yeah, it was really, really hard. But what am I going to do with it? You know, what am I going to do with it? Because if you attach to unforgiveness and bitterness, it's taking more away from me, sticking energy that I can invest in my children, invest in myself, invest in my business. My creativity would go down, my sense of hope would go down, because it's a drain, right? And so it's like one of the most important things. And some people, they don't know how to begin. Right. And just having a willingness is the first step. And. And I really Encourage those that are struggling with that to look at Fred's work because it's amazing. And we have our content, by the way, free on our YouTube channel.
Podcast Host
Oh, great.
Karen Guggenheim
And so you can see the talks there.
Podcast Host
The World Happiness Summit YouTube channel.
Karen Guggenheim
Yes, the World Happiness.
Podcast Host
That's really kind of you to. To put that up.
Karen Guggenheim
Yes, we wanted to do that because it's so. It's, it's amazing and against transformational. And the talks are like. They blow your mind, I bet.
Podcast Host
How many people attend these? Are we talking about?
Karen Guggenheim
Thousands? A thousand. And then we also do it online. So some people, some people join online and we do more than that. We do different kinds of programs. So we collaborated with a Ukrainian positive psychologist, Ala Klimenko, and we did two programs with her. One of them, Marty was involved and.
Podcast Host
That'S Martin Seligman for those.
Karen Guggenheim
Seligman listening. And so it was there for people in Ukraine, and we did that for free. Free programs. One called Resilience 2.0. And over 100,000 people have participated since last year. So that's really incredible. It's really amazing. And so when people say, oh well, do you. Is. Is it the right time to talk about happiness? Because that's another thing that I. Is it the right time? Because this or that is happening. And so the right time to talk about happiness is when you're ready to talk about happiness. And what I have found that people who are suffering, they want to know about these things. And so in March 2022, we had a lot of interest from people in Ukraine as they were beginning with the war and such. And we got some requests for people who were actually in camps in Poland saying they wanted to buy a online. So we donated it.
Podcast Host
What kind of camps?
Karen Guggenheim
It just refugee. You know, they were just fleeing. Some people gave them free copies, free access to the. They wanted to. They said, we're. We're suffering. Yeah, you know, we, we know that there's a World Happiness Summit. Can I buy a. A ticket or whatever. And so we donated those that access for free to, to be able to listen in virtually. But what I'm trying to say is that, you know, it's always the right time. Now we never push right. And shove it in anybody's face. What we're saying is that we're, we're a platform for this amazing work that people are doing and that we're now doing. So if you would like to understand what science says about well being says about happiness, about resilience, about grit, about forgiveness, kindness, meaning and purpose, Here it is.
Podcast Host
Yes.
Karen Guggenheim
You know, and so beyond that, now we've done, you know, we do workshops and we're doing things in education as well. And now moving into a women's initiative. So Wahasa Women Initiative. We're having the launch of the event at Gallup headquarters in Washington D.C. on December 4th. And it's talking about women's well being at work because it suffered a lot more than men's. Well, because one of the key aspects is that, you know, women tend to be the, the caregivers.
Podcast Host
Yeah.
Karen Guggenheim
And, and responsible. Largely. It's changing now, which is wonderful to see more of men caregiving, you know, to, to, to children. But, but largely it's women. So that's very. That impacts get burn.
Podcast Host
Burnout.
Karen Guggenheim
It's different. Yeah, it's, it's hard, it's challenging. So, so we're going to look at that. And of course, when, whether it's men or women, when one thrives, it trickles to the other. The same when, when we do things for children, it helps also the community. So what we're trying to do is also go into different points where we can help and shed light on different things that perhaps others are not doing at that moment so that we can all thrive together and create what Lyard talks about, the win win scenarios to move away from zero sum games. And that's from an economist. Right. Talking about creating these opportunities for growth.
Podcast Host
Yes. And Maslow would call them synergy, synergies. So Enhanced Spirituality is the last part of your book. What is Enhanced spirituality?
Karen Guggenheim
So I, like, I shared, you know, earlier when, when my husband passed away, I had this kind of spiritual, immediate spiritual. I don't know what it was. It was like a, like, like a holding something. I felt like something held me in that moment. And so from then on I just have been able to tap into this, you know, collective humanity and the importance of all of us being okay together and tapping into the fact that we're human beings. Right. And so, and we're more alike than not, even though we have all these differences. And that for me, spirituality and the things that bind us together in love, you know, that's that type of spirituality in that sense. And so the way that it was enhanced or that through the experience or through the post traumatic growth is that understanding that we are all intertwined.
Podcast Host
Really wonderful. All the things you're putting in this world. And I'm so glad we finally were able to do this podcast. And good luck on your book tour.
Karen Guggenheim
Thank you so much and thank you for all the work you're doing.
Podcast Host
Oh thank you.
Karen Guggenheim
Into making this world a better place and highlighting the work of others. And your work is so really important in this world too. Thank you.
Podcast Host
It's a lot.
LG XBoom Advertiser
Stop settling for weak sound. It's time to level up your game and bring the boom. Hit the town with The Ultra Durable LG XBoom Portable speaker and enjoy vibrant sound wherever you go. Elevate your listening experience to new heights because let's be real, your music deserves it. The future of sound is now with LG XBoom and for a limited time, save 25%@LG.com with code Fall25 Bring the Boom XBoom.
Washable Sofas Advertiser
Let's be real. Life happens. Kids spill, pets shed and accidents are inevitable. Find a sofa that can keep up@washablesofas.com Starting at just $699, our sofas are fully machine washable inside and out so you can say goodbye to stains and hello to worry free living. Made with liquid and stain resistant fabrics, they're kid proof, pet friendly and built for everyday life. Plus changeable fabric covers let you refresh your sofa whenever you want. Need flexibility? Our modular design lets you rearrange your sofa anytime to fit your space, whether it's a growing family room or a cozy apartment. Plus, they're earth friendly and trusted by over 200,000 happy customers. It's time to upgrade to a stress free, mess proof sofa. Visit washablesofas.com today and save that's washable. Offers are subject to change and certain restrictions may apply.
Podcast Host
The day begins at the Chase Sapphire.
LG XBoom Advertiser
Lounge by the club at Boston Logan Airport.
Podcast Host
You get the Clam Chowder in San Diego. It's Tostadas New York Espresso Martini. It's 10am why not? It's the quiet before your next flight. The shower that resets your day, the menu that lets you know where you are. This is access to over 1300 airport.
LG XBoom Advertiser
Lounges and every Sapphire lounge by the.
Podcast Host
Club and and one card that gets you in Chase Sapphire Reserve the most rewarding card.
Karen Guggenheim
Learn more@chase.com Sapphire Reserve cards issued by.
Podcast Host
JP Morgan, Chase bank and a member FDIC subject to credit approval.
Karen Guggenheim
This is an iHeart podcast.
Date: December 19, 2024
Host: Scott Barry Kaufman
Guest: Karen Guggenheim
Podcast: The Psychology Podcast by iHeartPodcasts
In this thought-provoking episode, Scott Barry Kaufman interviews Karen Guggenheim, founder of the World Happiness Summit, on the power of happiness to help overcome trauma. Drawing from her experience of sudden, devastating loss, Guggenheim shares how she rebuilt her life by embracing positive psychology, cultivating daily well-being practices, and transforming pain into purpose. The conversation explores the scientific and practical facets of happiness—including movement, relationships, forgiveness, meaning, and spirituality—and offers concrete advice for listeners facing adversity.
Personal Background & Identity Shift
The Impact of Loss
What Is Happiness?
Rethinking Trauma
Embracing Pain as a Pathway to Growth
Resilience, Grit, and Humor
Neuroplasticity and Becoming Happy Again
Small Rituals and Behavioral Activation
Movement and Breathing
Allowing Joy
Meaning as an Active Pursuit
Micro-Actions and Savoring for Their Own Sake
Making Room for Joy
About the Summit
Global Impact
Essentials of Happy Relationships
The Power of Forgiveness
Enhanced Spirituality & Interconnectedness
Synergy Over Zero-Sum Games
Final Takeaway:
Karen Guggenheim shows that happiness is not just a fleeting emotion but a collection of choices, habits, and mindsets—accessible even after trauma. While adversity is inevitable, reclaiming joy and meaning is possible through conscious practice, embracing difficult emotions, focusing on connection and forgiveness, and pursuing the greater good for oneself and others.
For listeners seeking transformation: