Podcast Summary: "Does This Sound As Crazy To You As It Does Me?"

Podcast: The Ramsey Show Highlights
Host(s): Dave Ramsey & Chris Hogan
Air Date: October 27, 2025
Duration: ~10 minutes

Episode Overview

In this episode, Dave Ramsey and Chris Hogan take a call from a 24-year-old listener who, with his wife, is in the process of building a "forever home"—with substantial financial involvement from his parents. The discussion centers on the complexities of borrowing from family, generational wealth, and the financial (and relational) wisdom of keeping money matters separate between family members. The hosts tackle questions about whether the caller and his wife should use their savings for the home or spend it on travel and lifestyle, and the deeper implications of debt between parents and children.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

Caller’s Situation & Question ([00:06]–[01:28])

• The caller and his wife, both 24, are building a home. Project costs escalated, so his parents stepped in financially.
• Financials:
  • Household income: ~$130,000/year (pre-tax).
  • Savings: $120,000.
  • Parents: Provided a lump sum for the home, balance to be “repaid” in mortgage payments directly to them.
• Question: Should he use a large portion of their savings to pay back his parents now, or keep it for travel and fun before kids?

Dave and Chris's Immediate Reactions ([00:57]–[02:35])

• Dave Ramsey: Expresses surprise at parents’ involvement given the couple's significant savings. Questions the rationale behind building such an expensive house and borrowing from parents.
  • Memorable quote:
    • “Why the flip did your parents have to give you money?” — Dave Ramsey [00:57]
    • “Do I borrow money from my parents when I'm newly married to travel? ...Does it sound as crazy to you as it does to me?” — Dave Ramsey [02:09]
• Dave and Chris clarify that the real risk is allowing financial entanglements to damage strong family relationships.

The Dangers of Mixing Family and Money ([02:35]–[04:00])

• Chris Hogan: Warns the caller that lending and borrowing within a family, even with the best intentions, can quickly cause tension and lasting damage.

  • Notable quote:
    • “The surest way to blow it up is to have money in between you.” — Chris Hogan [02:39]
    • “Clear the money between your relationships so that it can stay as good as it is right now.” — Chris Hogan [02:46]

• Dave Ramsey: Points out that even parents who follow Ramsey’s advice sometimes break the cardinal rule against lending to kids.

  • “...that part where they went through Financial Peace University, they flunked the class. Because we tell you not to do that. Ever. Don't ever loan your children money. Oh, my God.” — Dave Ramsey [03:20]

• Both hosts press on how this arrangement can burden the marriage, especially the relationship between daughter-in-law and parents.

Details of the Arrangement ([04:00]–[04:17])

• Caller: Breaks down the numbers:

  • Owes parents $200,000–$250,000 (to be paid back like a mortgage).
  • Received about $200,000–$250,000 as a “gift” from parents.

• Realization:

  • The couple is building a $450,000 home at age 24 while earning $130,000/year.

• Chris Hogan: Expresses shock at the scale of the home.

  • “Dang, Gina... It’s a lot of house, dude. That’s a lot of house.” [04:17–04:19]

The Hosts’ Financial Advice ([04:22]–[05:02])

• Dave Ramsey’s Recommendation:

  • Use the $130,000 savings to reduce owed amount to parents.
  • Critical advice: Don’t take a “family mortgage;” instead, secure a traditional commercial mortgage from a lender.
    • “...Take the 130,000. But I'm even going to go a step further. I'm going to put the 130,000 with your mom and dad to limit the size of the mortgage. And then I'm going to go get a commercial mortgage. Not from your parents.” — Dave Ramsey [04:22]

• Chris Hogan: Emphasizes showing maturity by “taking the reins” and refusing a parental mortgage. He paints a scenario: paying the parents a lump sum and taking the (small) remainder to a bank is what would make a parent proud.

  • “I would be so proud.... It would show a level of wisdom and maturity.” — Chris Hogan [05:02]

• Both hosts warn of the inevitable family drama that can arise from such debts.

On Prioritizing Vacation vs. Financial Security ([05:02]–[06:11])

• Chris Hogan: Suggests that deferring travel and using savings toward the house will pay off quickly, given their income.
  • “...Just go do that, man. You'll have that paid off in no time with as much money as y' all make if you don't go on trips.” — Chris Hogan [06:04]
• Dave Ramsey: Points out that vacations are more enjoyable when not burdened by financial baggage.

The Bigger Picture: Wisdom for Parents ([06:21]–End)

• Dave Ramsey: Gives a mini-lesson for parents who have achieved financial peace:
  • Rule: If you want to help your children, give a gift. Never loan money.
  • Reason: Lending changes the parent/child relationship in unintentional but very real ways.
    • “Never make your child—your grown child—your slave. You change your relationship with your daughter-in-law, your son-in-law. ... Even a nice master is a master.” — Dave Ramsey [06:49]
• Encouragement for changing family trees through generosity but not through debt.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “Do I borrow money from my parents when I'm newly married to travel? ...Does it sound as crazy to you as it does to me?” — Dave Ramsey [02:09]
• “The surest way to blow it up is to have money in between you.” — Chris Hogan [02:39]
• “Don’t ever loan your children money... The borrower is slave to the lender. Now you have to eat Thanksgiving dinner with your master.” — Dave Ramsey [03:20, 03:32]
• “Dang, Gina... It’s a lot of house, dude. That’s a lot of house.” — Chris Hogan [04:17]
• “If you want to give your children some money and they pay cash for a house ... great. Never make your child your grown child, your slave.” — Dave Ramsey [06:49]

Timeline of Important Segments

| Timestamp | Segment Description | |-------------|-----------------------------------------------------------------------------| | 00:06–01:28 | Caller explains situation and question | | 01:28–03:06 | Hosts probe into the arrangement and express concerns | | 03:06–04:00 | Discuss potential for relational fallout and specifics of borrowing | | 04:00–04:22 | Break down of financials; hosts react to house value | | 04:22–05:02 | Dave and Chris advise using savings and avoiding parental mortgage | | 05:02–06:11 | Emphasis on growing up, maturity, and waiting on travel | | 06:21–End | Advice for parents: gift, don’t loan; maintaining healthy family relationships|

Tone & Takeaways

The tone is candid, direct, and occasionally humorous, blending tough love with practical wisdom. The hosts emphasize protecting family relationships by avoiding financial entanglements and encourage financial maturity over short-term luxuries.

Summary:
If you’re building your financial future, prioritize using your own resources and keep money out of family relationships. Borrowing large sums from parents—even with good intentions—can strain the dynamic, create awkward power imbalances, and threaten the very relationships you cherish. The mature move is to use your savings, minimize your debt, and keep your parents in the role of family, not banker.