The Ramsey Show Highlights

Episode: Dump My Girlfriend Because She Doesn't Have A Lot Of Money?
Date: October 19, 2025
Hosts & Experts: Dave Ramsey, George Kamel (A & C)
Caller: "B" (Male, 48)

Episode Overview

This episode features a listener grappling with whether he should end a five-year relationship due to financial disparities with his girlfriend. The co-hosts explore deeper questions about financial compatibility, core values, and the role of money in relationships. The discussion emphasizes that true partnership is grounded in shared values, mutual respect, and understanding personal history, rather than pure financial metrics.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

Caller’s Situation & Concerns

• Background:

  • Caller (B, 48) has been dating his girlfriend (44) for five years.
  • He is a small business owner with an $80-90k income; she earns $60k, is a single mom, and debt-free aside from minor credit card debt.
  • B has a "money-driven, success-driven" mindset, while his girlfriend is less career-focused but very frugal and independent.

• Main Concern:

  • Caller wrestles with the feeling that his girlfriend’s lack of assets and lower financial standing might be a problem if they combine their lives.
  • He admits a fear rooted in childhood poverty: “What if the bottom fell out of my business... Could I count on her to support us?” [03:46]

Notable Quote

"She is just, she's an amazing woman. She's the best girl that I've ever dated in my life."
— B (Caller) [01:16]

Expert Analysis & Advice

Addressing Financial Disparity

• C (George Kamel):
  • Points out the practical reality: both have solid incomes; the disparity isn’t extreme.
  • Notes she's frugal, independent, no significant debt — all positive signs for a long-term relationship.
  • "I don't see any crazy red flags so far. Is she in crippling debt?...She’s very frugal, she’s independent, she has no debt." [02:46–03:13]

Beyond the Numbers: Values and Respect

• A (Dave Ramsey):
  • Emphasizes assessing respect for character over bank balance:

    “The big question is not how much money she has...What should be in the discussion is do you respect her character, her work ethic, do you respect her intellect and what she can add to the equation. And if you don't respect someone, then it’s very difficult to love them...” [04:23]

  • Suggests that worries about financial disparity may actually mask deeper issues about respect and value alignment.

Financial History and Emotional Triggers

• A (Dave Ramsey):
  • Recognizes the caller’s fear of poverty as a lingering influence from his upbringing.
  • Recommends reading Rachel Cruze’s book, Know Yourself, Know Your Money, to understand how family of origin shapes money views, which could help both partners empathize with each other's perspectives. [05:30]

Advice on Moving Forward

• Consideration for pre-marriage counseling is recommended to openly discuss values and fears around money before deciding to move in or get married.
• "It sounds...like a good opportunity for some good pre-marriage counseling to sit down with a good marriage counselor and get this stuff out on the table and those fears out there..." [04:55]

Broader Insights on Money and Relationships

• Money as a Window into Values

  • “Money is a good thing for that. Not because money's important, but because money reveals a lot about your character. It reveals a lot about your dreams, it reveals a lot about your fears.”
    —A (Dave Ramsey) [06:29]
  • How couples handle money together often translates into broader relationship patterns.

• Value Alignment Trumps Differences in Habits

  • “If the values are there, then you can survive it...you’ll have a nerd and a free spirit, a spender and a saver. But if the values are there at the foundation, you can survive the relationship.”
    —C (George Kamel) [07:35]

• Family of Origin’s Influence

  • Both hosts share how their own backgrounds influenced their expectations and partnership:

    “We weren’t sophisticated enough when we were dating... but both families put a heavy emphasis on hard work and common sense.”
    —A (Dave Ramsey) [07:53]

Notable Quotes & Moments

• On Partner Selection and Respect:

  “If you think she's deficit the whole time, that's probably not going to end up being there...but it's not based on her income.”
  —A (Dave Ramsey) [04:40]

• On Core Values:

  “Money reveals a lot about your character. It reveals a lot about your dreams, it reveals a lot about your fears.”
  —A (Dave Ramsey) [06:29]

• On Relationship Success:

  "If the values are there at the foothold and foundation, you can survive the relationship..."
  —C (George Kamel) [07:36]

Important Timestamps

• 00:28 — Caller explains the financial considerations complicating his relationship
• 01:42 — Caller clarifies he wishes for a partner “closer to me financially”
• 02:46 — Discussion on the girlfriend's financial habits and actual “disparity”
• 03:46 — Caller admits his fear of falling back into poverty
• 04:23 — Dave and George emphasize respect, character, and work ethic over money
• 05:30 — Suggestion: Read Know Yourself, Know Your Money for insight on money mindsets
• 06:29–07:36 — Reflection on money as a reflection of character and importance of shared values

Summary Takeaway

The final advice:
It's not the numbers in a partner’s account, but their values, character, and work ethic that truly matter. Financial backgrounds and old fears can cloud judgment, but with shared values and respect—and a willingness to communicate openly—long-term success is much more likely. Pre-marriage counseling and understanding each other’s financial upbringing are smart next steps before making a life-changing decision.