He Hasn’t Filed Taxes In 20 Years

Summary

Summary of "He Hasn’t Filed Taxes In 20 Years" – The Ramsey Show Highlights

Release Date: February 1, 2025

In the episode titled "He Hasn’t Filed Taxes In 20 Years," hosted by the Ramsey Network, listeners are presented with a gripping real-life scenario that delves into the complexities of financial honesty within a marriage. The episode offers insightful advice from Dave Ramsey and his co-hosts, addressing the challenges faced by individuals when confronted with a partner’s long-standing financial deceit.

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Caller’s Dilemma: Unveiling Hidden Financial Secrets

The episode begins with a distressed caller reaching out to The Ramsey Show to discuss a troubling discovery in her marriage. After three years of marriage, she uncovers that her husband has not filed taxes for over two decades. This revelation sets the stage for a deep dive into the repercussions of financial dishonesty in relationships.

Key Points:

• Delayed Tax Filing: The husband failed to file taxes for more than 20 years, a secret kept hidden from the wife until recently.
• Ultimatum Given: Last year, the caller issued an ultimatum, urging her husband to address the tax issues by establishing a payment system and communicating with tax authorities.
• Failed Resolution: The husband claimed to have filed an extension with a tax professional who later passed away, revealing that he never engaged with this individual.

Notable Quote:

Caller (00:25): "And I'm very, very firm on this. I don't know. Things have been hidden from me."

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Dave Ramsey’s Assessment: Unpacking the Behavior

Dave Ramsey responds empathetically, probing the severity of the situation and the underlying behaviors exhibited by the husband. He interprets the husband’s actions as a manifestation of fear, choice to hide issues rather than confront them, and the impact this has on the marital relationship.

Key Points:

• Behavior as Communication: Ramsey suggests that the husband's behavior is a form of communication, indicating his fear and unwillingness to address the financial issues.
• Trust and Safety: Emphasizes that the husband prioritizes his fear over the wife’s sense of security within the marriage.
• Impact on Family: The situation is further complicated by the presence of the caller’s five children from a previous marriage, raising concerns about the broader familial impact.

Notable Quotes:

Dave Ramsey (00:23): "Oh, geez. How bad is it?"

Dave Ramsey (01:05): "So if behavior is a language, what's he been telling you for the last year?"

Dave Ramsey (01:30): "Is there kids in this mix?"

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Financial Deception and Its Consequences

As the conversation progresses, the caller reveals additional layers of deception, including discrepancies in her husband’s reported income. She discovers that while her husband declared a certain salary, his actual earnings are significantly higher, with the surplus funds unaccounted for.

Key Points:

• Income Discrepancy: The husband reported earning $20,000 less annually than his true salary, leading to questions about the allocation of the hidden income.
• Financial Independence: The caller has maintained separate finances, never consolidating bank accounts, as a precautionary measure.
• Asset Protection: Efforts include preventing shared financial liabilities and safeguarding personal credit by not allowing the husband to pull anything in her name.

Notable Quote:

Caller (02:43): "I found out that had just gotten a job a couple years back with the company I work with, and the salary that he was telling me what it was was actually like $20,000 less annually than what he is actually being paid."

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Advice and Next Steps: Legal and Financial Measures

Recognizing the gravity of the situation, Dave Ramsey advises the caller to take immediate legal and financial steps to protect herself and her children. This includes consulting a tax attorney to navigate the complexities of the unfiled taxes and potential liabilities.

Key Points:

• Consult a Tax Attorney: Essential to understand obligations and mitigate potential repercussions from unfiled taxes.
• Credit Protection: Ramsey recommends freezing credit to prevent further unauthorized financial activities.
• Divorce Considerations: Given the caller’s previous experience with an ugly divorce, the importance of preparing for possible marital dissolution is underscored.

Notable Quotes:

Dave Ramsey (02:14): "He's not."

Co-host (04:32): "And then you or him, maybe both, need to get in touch with a tax attorney ASAP and figure out what's the next step, because this is not going to just go away."

Dave Ramsey (04:47): "And they may hold you responsible for some of the tax, the joint taxes while you were together."

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Emotional and Psychological Impact

The episode also touches on the emotional turmoil experienced by the caller, who faces not only financial uncertainty but also the erosion of trust within her marriage. Ramsey acknowledges the caller’s past trauma from a previous divorce and anticipates similar feelings resurfacing.

Key Points:

• Self-Blame and Trust Issues: The caller grapples with self-blame for not recognizing red flags earlier, a common reaction in such distressing situations.
• Preparedness for Divorce: Emphasizes the need for emotional and financial preparedness, particularly when entering into the difficult process of divorce.
• Future Stability: The caller aspires to achieve financial stability by purchasing a home, thereby providing a secure environment for her children and future generations.

Notable Quotes:

Dave Ramsey (03:13): "So it's really common to find yourself in this situation and when you get in to go through an ugly divorce before, especially one that you thought was going to be forever, it's common to look in the mirror and lose trust in you."

Dave Ramsey (03:43): "That's right. And so I guarantee you that's happening again tenfold this time."

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Conclusion: Empowerment Through Action

In concluding the episode, Ramsey and his co-hosts reiterate the necessity of taking proactive steps to address the financial and legal challenges posed by the husband's long-term tax evasion. They encourage listeners to seek professional advice, protect their financial standing, and prioritize their well-being and that of their children.

Key Points:

• Proactive Measures: Encourages immediate action to prevent further financial harm.
• Professional Guidance: Stresses the importance of consulting with experts to navigate complex tax and legal issues.
• Personal Empowerment: Highlights the significance of reclaiming financial independence and ensuring a secure future.

Notable Quotes:

Dave Ramsey (04:59): "I would get a tax attorney. And if he won't, then you need to go on your own. And I'm sorry that this has happened to you yet again. What a mess."

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Final Thoughts: "He Hasn’t Filed Taxes In 20 Years" serves as a poignant exploration of the devastating effects of financial deceit in a marital relationship. Through compassionate dialogue and practical advice, Dave Ramsey and his co-hosts provide invaluable guidance to individuals facing similar challenges, emphasizing the importance of transparency, legal action, and personal resilience in overcoming financial adversities.

Transcript

[Caller]

Brought to you by Y Refi Refinance your defaulted private student loans [e-mail] Ramsey I've been with someone and recently married three years and found out last year that my spouse has not filed taxes for over 20 plus years.

[Dave Ramsey]

Oh, geez. How bad is it?

[Caller]

And I'm very, very firm on this. I don't know. Things have been hidden from me. I gave them an ultimatum last year. I said, listen, you've got one year to clear this up, to get started, to reach out, get a payment system going. I was like, if you talk to them, they're not going to come after you. They'll work with you. Because I've had it happen before. So a year went by and I found out that the person he was supposedly taking his taxes to and filed an extension with had passed away. I had no idea this person had passed away. And come to find out, he then admitted he had never taken any information to this person whatsoever.

[Dave Ramsey]

So if behavior is a language, what's he been telling you for the last year?

[Caller]

That he's too scared. And he's putting that fear over our relationship.

[Dave Ramsey]

That's one way to think of it. I was thinking more him looking at you, saying, I would rather be scared and hide than to make my new wife feel safe.

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Dave Ramsey]

Is. Is. Is there. Is there kids in this mix?

[Caller]

Well, there are five kids. Thankfully, they're from a previous marriage. So I. I'm not really sure how to proceed with this other than I've been researching and trying to protect myself. Luckily, I've always done married filing singly because it just seemed odd to me that, you know, I say, hey, let's. Let's get our taxes going. He goes, well, I'm gonna be a little bit late. You know, you go ahead and do it this way. And I said, okay. And then it finally really just started gnawing at me last year. And when I found out about that.

[Co-host]

Is he ready to deal with this or is this just you wanting him to?

[Dave Ramsey]

He's not.

[Caller]

I want him to. And it's been over a year now. I'm going to have to make good.

[Co-host]

On my word, which is, is he ready for his kids to visit him in prison? What's his game plan here?

[Caller]

I. I have no idea. Just put your head in the sand, I guess, and hope that, you know, you've dodged the bullet for 20 plus years. Maybe. Maybe you'll get lucky a little bit longer.

[Dave Ramsey]

What else, what else? Is he not honest with you about this? This kind of stuff doesn't happen in a vacuum.

[Co-host]

Probably. Other debts, his spending? I'm guessing no. Shared financial life?

[Caller]

No. I found out that had just gotten a job a couple years back with the company I work with, and the salary that he was telling me what it was was actually like $20,000 less annually than what he is actually being paid.

[Co-host]

So he's actually making more and he's using that money for God knows what.

[Caller]

Exactly. I don't know what.

[Dave Ramsey]

So have you been through an ugly divorce before?

[Caller]

Yes.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay.

[Caller]

I have.

[Dave Ramsey]

So it's really common to find yourself in this situation and when you get in to go through an ugly divorce before, especially one that you thought was going to be forever, it's common to look in the mirror and lose trust in you. Like, what did I not see? Why did I do this sooner? Like all that kind of stuff that comes with it.

[Caller]

Right. Blaming myself for not seeing red flags sooner.

[Dave Ramsey]

That's right. And so I guarantee you that's happening again tenfold this time. Yeah, Here I go again.

[Caller]

Very, very Dave Ramsey approach. Actually, he introduced it to me back after my last failed marriage. And I've been working really hard to be financially sound.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah, but he's a scam artist. He's a scam artist and a liar. Doesn't tell the truth.

[Caller]

Yes. And so I've done. The morning of my marriage, I've. I've moved on with that. I've been moving finances to a totally separate institution. We've never had a bank account together, anything like that. I just. I don't want my children to be affected by this. I want to buy my house. I rent a house from my mother.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay.

[Caller]

I want to buy it. I want to have that stability so that I can have my grandbabies come here someday.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah. And have you pulled your credit to see if he's pulled anything in your name?

[Caller]

No, he has not. I did check that.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay. I would freeze that, too.

[Caller]

Okay.

[Co-host]

And then you or him, maybe both, need to get in touch with a tax attorney ASAP and figure out what's the next step, because this is not going to just go away. They don't just go. Well, I guess he doesn't exist anymore. He hasn't paid his taxes. He fled town. They're going to find him.

[Dave Ramsey]

And they may hold you responsible for some of the tax, the joint taxes while you were together. So, yeah, I would get a tax attorney. And if he won't, then you need to go on your own. And I'm sorry that this has happened to you yet again. What a mess.

[Co-host]

This is the Ramsey Show.

[Caller]

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