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Brought to you by why refi refinance your defaulted private student loans today@yrefi.com Ramsey.
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The Ramsey Show Question of the day. Here we go. Brought to you from Lucia in New Jersey. My sister's going through a divorce and has to refinance her home to remove her ex husband from the mortgage. She asked if I would add her as an authorized user on my credit card, but not to give her a card so she won't be able to use it. She says it would just help her credit score so that she can get a better rate when she refinances. I've never done this, so I'm not sure if it will affect my credit score, which is in the 800s. Do you see any red flags with this plan?
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Too many to count.
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All I see is all red flags.
A
No, I would not add her. This is not going to be a blessing to either of you. I hate that she's going through this. It's going to be tough. But here's the good news. As her credit score improves, as she makes mortgage payments and stays out of debt and stays on time with all of her payments, her credit score will naturally improve and she can refinance to a better rate down the road. But I would not add her as an authorized user. Her credit history will become part of your credit history and affect both of you. And if you make any poor decisions, God forbid, then that will also affect her negatively. And so I would say, listen, I love you a lot. I cannot bring you into my financial world and tether you to it. There's risk for both of us. And, and I'm not comfortable doing that.
B
And let me put this out there. I know this is, it's one of those things where you say something like this and those who don't need to hear it take it to heart. And those who do need to hear it won't hear you anyway. If you need help financially from a friend, say I need some money. Like that's the, that's the cleanest, clearest way to say I need some help. But asking them to co sign to ask to hear it. Will you be an authorized user on a credit card but you, you keep the card you don't like? No, you're asking me to be your babysitter, to be your mom, to also be your financial advisor. And when you need a card and I won't give it to you, then you, I get to be your punching bag. Like you are choosing to disrupt the friendship and kind of blow it up. I'D rather a friend come to me and say hey, I'm in a pickle, I need X amount of dollars than to come up with some scheme as to like this is how like a work. It won't affect you but it'll help me. It just causes problems down the road.
A
Yeah, and the other part of this is you might actually be hurting her by artificially propping her up and keeping her in this house that she really can't afford.
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That's right.
A
The answer might be she needs to sell the house because it's too much for her to take on on her own and that's not a fun thing to do. But it might be the truth she needs to hear and so you can be a support for her without attaching her to your financial world and dragging each other down. Great question though. Why refi refinances delinquent private student loans for struggling borrowers? Learn more at Y r e f y.com ra.
Podcast Summary: The Ramsey Show Highlights – Help My Sister Build Her Credit?
Episode Details
In this episode of The Ramsey Show Highlights, the Ramsey Network tackles a listener's dilemma involving family, credit scores, and financial boundaries. The discussion provides valuable insights into managing personal finances while maintaining healthy relationships.
Lucia from New Jersey submits a question seeking advice on how to assist her sister during a divorce-induced financial upheaval:
"My sister's going through a divorce and has to refinance her home to remove her ex-husband from the mortgage. She asked if I would add her as an authorized user on my credit card, but not to give her a card so she won't be able to use it. She says it would just help her credit score so that she can get a better rate when she refinances. I've never done this, so I'm not sure if it will affect my credit score, which is in the 800s. Do you see any red flags with this plan?"
— Lucia, New Jersey [00:10]
Host A immediately addresses the concerns raised:
"Too many to count."
— Host A [00:41]
Adding an authorized user can intertwine both parties' credit histories. Host A elaborates:
"Her credit history will become part of your credit history and affect both of you. And if you make any poor decisions, God forbid, then that will also affect her negatively."
— Host A [00:44]
This highlights the potential for mutual financial repercussions. Even with an excellent credit score, unforeseen financial missteps can jeopardize both individuals' financial standings.
Host A emphasizes the personal risk involved:
"I love you a lot. I cannot bring you into my financial world and tether you to it. There's risk for both of us."
— Host A [01:04]
By linking credit histories, both Lucia and her sister are exposed to shared financial vulnerabilities, which could strain their relationship beyond financial matters.
Transitioning to Host B, the discussion shifts towards healthier ways to offer financial assistance without entangling credit histories:
"If you need help financially from a friend, say I need some money. Like that's the, that's the cleanest, clearest way to say I need some help."
— Host B [01:27]
Host B advises against indirect financial schemes, advocating for direct communication when seeking or offering monetary support. This approach preserves both parties' financial integrity and relational harmony.
The hosts delve into the emotional complexities of financial support within family relationships. Host A warns:
"You might actually be hurting her by artificially propping her up and keeping her in this house that she really can't afford."
— Host A [02:21]
Host B concurs, emphasizing that such financial maneuvers can inadvertently trap the sister in a burdensome living situation:
"The answer might be she needs to sell the house because it's too much for her to take on on her own and that's not a fun thing to do. But it might be the truth she needs to hear."
— Host B [02:28]
The hosts collectively recommend that Lucia support her sister by encouraging responsible financial habits rather than temporary fixes. They suggest that as the sister consistently makes mortgage payments, avoids debt, and maintains punctuality with all financial obligations, her credit score will organically improve. This sustainable approach ensures long-term financial health without introducing unnecessary risks.
Host A encapsulates the advice:
"You can be a support for her without attaching her to your financial world and dragging each other down."
— Host A [02:29]
This episode underscores the importance of setting clear financial boundaries while providing compassionate support to family members facing financial challenges. By prioritizing transparent communication and responsible financial practices, individuals can maintain both their financial health and personal relationships.