How Do I Deal With Parents That Mismanage Their Money?

Summary

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Podcast Summary: The Ramsey Show Highlights

Episode: How Do I Deal With Parents That Mismanage Their Money?
Date: November 22, 2025
Length: ~7 minutes of content (ad sections omitted)
Hosts/Experts featured: [Unspecified, typical Ramsey Network panel dynamics]

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Overview

This episode addresses a listener’s dilemma: He’s achieved financial freedom (Baby Step 7 of Ramsey’s system), but he’s burned out and struggling with family dynamics, particularly having hired his parents for a side business while watching them mismanage their own personal finances. The hosts offer advice on boundaries, emotional fatigue, and when to let go.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Caller’s Background and Emotional Burnout

• The caller (“Chase” as referenced by the hosts) has worked multiple jobs to become completely debt free, including home and car [00:08–00:40].

• He expresses exhaustion after two years of intense effort, especially since his wife could not return to work due to family and health complications [00:18–01:03].

• He wonders if now is the time to pause side income streams or keep pushing himself.

  Memorable Moment:

  • D: “Yesterday.” [00:28] (on when Chase should pause and rest after debt freedom)
  • C: “Baby Step seven. That’s impressive.” [06:34]

2. The Side Business and Family Employment

• Chase runs a small business (side hustle) where he’s hired his parents (who are otherwise qualified) [01:03–01:54].

• He notes his parents are making questionable financial decisions—taking on loans and buying unnecessary vehicles—despite extra income [01:40–02:13].

• The side business nets only about $1,100 a month, paid to his parents as side income (not base living expenses) [04:09–04:29].

  Host Clarity:

  • D: “You’re not enabling them because they’re doing a job and getting paid for the job. It’s not like you’re just giving them money because they asked for money.” [03:12]

3. The Dilemma: To Close or Keep the Business

• The core concern: Is Chase responsible for “enabling” his parents’ bad financial behavior by employing them?

• The hosts clarify boundaries: As long as they’re working for pay, he is not enabling them the same as if he were gifting money [03:12–03:31].

• Closing the business is positioned as a separate decision—more about his fatigue and priorities than his parents’ spending [03:31–04:29].

  Memorable Quotes:

  • C: “If you were going to, like, put them on the streets because now they’re out of a job, then I’d be like, hey, let's be a little more cautious about this. …but if you had the conversation with them… I'm done with it emotionally, physically… I'm shutting down the shop.” [04:31–04:48]

4. Coaching Unwilling Family Members

• Chase feels conflicted as a financial coach watching his parents slide into debt, but they are not receptive [03:33–05:51].

• The hosts stress that unsolicited financial advice, even from a coach, is rarely welcome—especially from a child to parents.

• They encourage Chase to step back unless invited to help.

  Notable Quotes:

  • D: “Unless they invite you into their life to coach them on it, then it’s a moot point. …It’s going to just cause resentment.” [05:22–05:25]
  • D: “When the student's ready, the teacher appears, and they're not ready.” [05:59]

5. Final Thoughts and Boundaries

• The overarching advice: Chase should focus on his own young family and wellbeing, not try to control or rescue his parents [05:47–06:17].

• The most he can do is live by example, possibly sparking their interest in better money management.

  Summary Moment:

  • C: “All you can do is live your life…hopefully in a way that makes them go, man, what's Chase doing over there? I'm interested. Tell me more. …Parents, that's one of the hardest ones to tackle because they remember changing your diaper yesterday. They're not looking for financial advice from you.” [06:17–06:34]

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• 00:08–00:40 – Caller’s debt-free journey and exhaustion
• 01:03–01:54 – Small business background; employing parents
• 01:54–03:12 – Parents’ financial missteps and implications
• 03:12–03:31 – Are you enabling with employment?
• 03:40–04:48 – Deciding to close the side business
• 05:22–05:59 – Unsolicited advice and boundaries
• 06:17–06:34 – Live by example; parent-child coaching challenges

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Tone and Takeaways

• Empathetic, direct, and pragmatic: The hosts validate the caller’s fatigue, support the idea of setting boundaries, and acknowledge the emotional weight of family financial issues.
• Key Takeaway: “You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make them drink.” [05:59]

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Conclusion

This episode provides practical and compassionate advice for anyone feeling responsible for financially misguided family members—especially for adult children dealing with parents. The message is clear: Respect boundaries, offer help only when invited, and don’t jeopardize your own progress or wellbeing for someone else’s financial choices.

Transcript

[A]

Zander shops all the top term insurance companies to save you money. Get [e-mail].

[B]

I got a two parter. First part is I've been Gazelle intense for a while. We're actually debt free. Home, cars, everything.

[A]

Wow.

[C]

Way to go.

[D]

Yeah, that's awesome.

[B]

I'm a little, I'm a little tired at this point because I've been working two to three jobs and just kind of figuring out when to put pause on, you know, extra income and just kind of relax for a little while.

[C]

Yesterday.

[B]

Well, yeah, it's just I guess the scary part because we're single income right now, so part of me is just.

[C]

Like, but you're in baby step seven. You have no mortgage payment, right?

[B]

Correct. But I mean, we do want to move from where we're at now. That's. I guess that's the quick answer of now is the time to stop that.

[D]

How long did it take you to accomplish this? How long have you been in this grind?

[B]

It was kind of on and off for two years because of the child and I, you know, just some complications around birth and stuff. So that's, that's why mama hasn't went back to work. So.

[D]

Okay, that's fine.

[B]

But yeah, it's, it's been, I guess on me for almost two years at this point. So. Okay, so like I said, just kind of wanting to hit pause on some of those. And that leads me into second part. I've got a small business on the side that I have some employees that I don't know how to coach because I do a little financial coaching. And they seem to be misbehaving with all the money that I pay them, even though I gave them the position to kind of help them get out of debt.

[D]

Personally. Personally misbehaving with the money or like as a part of the company misbehaving with it?

[B]

No, personally misbehaving. Just buying vehicles they don't need buying. Oh, recreational vehicles.

[C]

And these are just like that. How'd you find these people?

[B]

Family.

[C]

Wait, they, they're actual akin to you?

[B]

Yes, yes.

[C]

Like cousins, uncles, aunts. Who are we talking?

[B]

Parents.

[C]

You hired your parents for your small business and they're going out and taking on debt and you're like, well, that's, that wasn't the intended goal. I was, I gave them the job. So you gave them the job even though they really weren't qualified to help them out financially, quote unquote?

[B]

No, they're, they're very qualified for the business. However, it's just the, they're, they're adding small personal loans at this point to, to try to justify moving payments around, but other than that, it's.

[D]

How many people is this. It's your parents? Is it anybody else?

[B]

No, it's, it's just a business that I had started. It became overwhelming for me, like I said, with the, the newborn.

[D]

No, no, I'm talking about the, the part you said about. Okay, it's two, there's two things we're talking about. You hired your parents to work in the business. You said they're qualified. They, that's all good, but over here you found out that they're spending their money in a way that you don't like. Correct. That has nothing to do with the business. That's just their personal life. But you're saying, hey, I know that's not very wise. I'd like to be able to help them out. Right.

[C]

You, you feel like you're enabling them by doing.

[B]

How do I go about it? Of like, grace. Of like I'm saying either I, I shut the business down and just walk away from it or just keep it open and kind of guide them a little bit.

[D]

I don't think differently. I don't think one, I mean, I, I, this is my perspective. I don't think that one has to do with another. You're not enabling them because they're doing a job and they're getting paid for the job. Right. It's not like they're, you're not just giving them money because they asked for money. They're working and you're paying them wages. Correct?

[B]

Correct.

[D]

So that's. Okay. Now you're talking about shutting down your business. What's that about? Because don't tell me that you're shutting down your business because your parents don't know how to spend their paycheck.

[B]

That's a, that is too layered. It's, it's. Now that I guess technically we're at baby step seven and I'm so tired from the last two to three years here.

[D]

Okay.

[B]

That it's, it's kind of a headache and it's kind of, it's not that much of my income to.

[C]

It's not like the side business blew up and you're like, I could replace my full time job. You're just like, I'm done with this side. It was a fun side hustle while I got out of debt. I'm done with it.

[D]

What, what does it.

[B]

About 1100amonth.

[D]

Okay. Okay.

[C]

How are you even paying your parents? From that.

[B]

It's just. It's kind of subcontracted out to them, so I think.

[C]

But it's not like they're making four grand a month from this. They're not, like, paying bills.

[B]

No, no. It's just.

[C]

Is it a side hustle for them, too?

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Okay, then just shut it down.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

If you were going to, like, put them on the streets because now they're out of a job, then I'd be like, hey, let's be a little more cautious about this. But if you had the conversation with them, said, hey, I started this because I was trying to get out of debt. I'm kind of done with it emotionally. Physically, I'm tired. So you guys are going to need to. If you want more side hustle money, you're going to find it elsewhere. Yeah, I'm shutting down the shop.

[D]

And I also think the whole thing of them, the way they're spending their money, if they're open to maybe you telling them a little bit about, you know, Ramsay and how you figured out how to manage your money, I think that's fine. But honestly, I kind of feel like right now that's the least of things you need to be worried about. It sounds like you have a lot going on at home with your wife and this baby. And when you called, that seemed to be the thing that was getting your goat. And I think your parents is just kind of this nuisance that you're observing over here. And I think you just need to kind of swap that away for now.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

Because the truth is, you can't control what they do with their money.

[D]

Right.

[C]

And unless they invite you into their life to coach them on it, then it's. It's a moot point. They're just. It's going to just cause resentment.

[B]

I think that's the part that that gets me is like, I do kind of, like, coach on the side. Just kind of, I guess, freelance, whatever.

[C]

You want to call. Have you offered that to them? Say, hey, I do coaching on the side. Like, I know I'm your son and you're. It's. It's awkward, but I'd be happy to look at your numbers.

[B]

You know, it gets very sticky, so.

[C]

They don't want you to cut it loose. Yeah.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

And that's where. That's where I was looking for advice. It's just like, when somebody doesn't want it, do I just need to walk away?

[D]

Yes.

[B]

Watch the train wreck happen?

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

No, walk away. Because for people, like, when they're. When the student's ready, the teacher appears, and they're not ready. So one day they might be, and you might be the teacher. And one day they might be ready, and it's somebody else, maybe from their church or a friend of theirs. So you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make them drink, Right.

[B]

All righty.

[C]

All you can do is live your life and hopefully do it in a way that makes them go, man, what's Chase doing over there? I'm interested. Tell me more. But, man, parents, that's one of the hardest ones to tackle because they remember changing your diaper yesterday. They're not looking for financial advice from you exactly, but way to go, Chase. Baby. Step seven. That's impressive.

[A]

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