Podcast Summary: The Ramsey Show Highlights

Episode Title: How Do I Tell My Girlfriend I Lied About How Much Money I Make?
Date: November 17, 2025
Hosts: Rachel Cruze & Jada Cruze
Caller: Trey

Episode Overview

This episode centers around Trey, a caller seeking advice on how to come clean to his girlfriend, Shayla, about being less than honest regarding his credit card debt. As he and Shayla contemplate marriage, Trey is grappling with embarrassment and worry over the financial transparency required in their relationship. Rachel and Jada Cruze guide Trey through the emotional and practical elements of this dilemma, focusing on honesty, healthy financial habits, and the foundation of trust in a relationship.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Nature of Trey’s Financial Situation

• Trey’s Debt: About $4,000 in credit card debt, up from the $2,000 he previously disclosed to his girlfriend.
• Timeframe: He mentioned the $2k a few weeks ago, but since then added another $2k mostly on apartment-related purchases (00:06–01:41).
• Reason for Debt Increase: Needed to buy new furniture and household items for his apartment after returning borrowed items to his sister and felt pressured by time constraints (01:35–03:47).

2. The Disclosure Dilemma

• Admission: Trey admits he’s feeling guilty for not being fully transparent. His girlfriend is listening to the show as he calls in, increasing the emotional stakes (02:18–02:45).
• Honesty Timeline: Jada clarifies that the deception was recent rather than a long-term lie, but emphasizes the need to address it quickly (01:15–01:25, 05:21–05:40).

3. Emotional Motivations & Communication Patterns

• Reasons for Concealment: Trey points to embarrassment and fear of disappointing Shayla, especially as they discuss marriage and saving for a future together (05:40–06:13).
• Positive Steps: Rachel and Jada stress that coming on the show is already a step toward vulnerability and honest communication, which are essential to building trust (06:14–07:16).

4. Advice for Handling Debt & Relationship Transparency

• Learning to Pause: Rachel and Jada encourage Trey to avoid feeling rushed into debt and to consider alternatives like borrowing furniture or buying less expensive options (04:10–04:56).
• Building Trust: Both hosts urge Trey to be transparent in relationships and start marital life on a foundation of open communication, even about minor things like pots and pans (06:34–07:32).
• Establishing Healthy Patterns: The principle matters more than the amount—secrets erode trust, so honest communication is vital, regardless of how “small” the secret may seem (07:32–07:39).

5. Practical Financial Steps Forward

• Cut Up Credit Cards: Jada and Rachel advise Trey to cut up his credit cards immediately and start cash-flowing expenses for the future, including the upcoming engagement and wedding costs (07:39–08:21).
• Unified Financial Planning: They celebrate Shayla’s involvement and level-headedness and suggest that she and Trey continue their joint focus on responsible financial habits (07:48–08:35).

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Facing the Music:
  “This is like Maury, why did you make it like this, Trey?”
  — Rachel Cruze (02:34)

• On Relationship Foundations:
  “Starting off marriage with hiding the pots and pans… Trey, we don’t wanna do that. Secrets start to—that erodes trust so fast.”
  — Jada Cruze (06:34)

• On Alternatives to Going into Debt:
  “Could I go on Craigslist? Or an air mattress?”
  — Rachel Cruze (04:39)
  “Or an air mattress. A hundred dollar air mattress. I slept on an air mattress for a long time.”
  — Jada Cruze (04:54)

• On Small Lies and Trust:
  “Let me just say to lighten the load a little bit that it’s $2,000. Okay. Some people… it could be much worse. But regardless of the amount, it’s the principle behind it.”
  — Jada Cruze (07:16)

• On Making Changes Together:
  “Once you start doing stuff that we talk about—so cut up the credit cards, you guys. Cash flow… She sounds amazing, I know she’s listening. Girl, we are for you. We are on her team and your team.”
  — Jada Cruze (07:48)

• On Relationship Status:
  “Right now, I’ve been with her off and on for about a year now, but I have been secured with her… going on three months now.”
  — Trey (08:24)

Important Timestamps

• Trey describes his debt and the minor lie: 00:06–01:13
• Discussion of why Trey hid the truth: 01:13–02:20
• Shayla, the girlfriend, is listening: 02:20–02:45
• Breakdown of purchases and debt cause: 01:35–03:47
• Hosts discuss urgency and avoiding debt traps: 04:10–04:56
• Advice on open communication and building trust: 06:14–07:32
• Call to cut up credit cards & plan financially as a couple: 07:39–08:35

Tone & Closing Thoughts

The hosts handle Trey’s dilemma with a mix of empathy and straight talk, maintaining their trademark blend of warmth, humor, and tough love. Their core message is clear: building a future together starts with honesty and good financial habits—no matter how minor the issue may seem. They remind listeners (and Trey) that small secrets can grow into big problems, and that open dialogue is both freeing and foundational for long-term relationship health.