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Dave Ramsey
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Caller
Okay, so I have a question. I just recently found out that my husband, the total of the credit card debt that he's got is. I'm guessing and assuming or not assuming, but I guessing 60 to 80,000. And I just keep finding out little things here and there of more. And my goal, our goal was supposed to be to get a house and move out of, you know, where we're at and the choices that he continues to make. For example, on wanting a couch, that going from like $100 couch, he wants like two to $4,000 couch and get into that debt. And now he brought up this morning that the easiest way we can get out of debt is to do. It's a consolidation. All the debt is put into one payment. And I feel it's like getting into more debt. It's not biblical. I'm at my wits end. I don't know how else I could guide him besides saying it's a bad idea and I don't know what to do. Y' all.
Dave Ramsey
Okay? Yeah, that little part of the whole conversation is a bad idea for sure. The worst idea is the way you guys are operating. You're operating like roommates. And your roommate has a budget. Your roommate has a problem over here. Instead of like the two of us together make our decisions together, and we manage our money together to go to the dreams that we want to live together. And he's acting like a free agent just running around over here. And you can't tell me if I buy a couch and I'll do whatever I want to do. And I may or may not tell you, and that's really destructive, isn't it?
Caller
Yes, sir. And I don't know what else to do. I've suggested the budget, the app, and it's just.
Financial Expert
That's not where. That's not where the problem lies. Here's the problem. Number one, you don't even know how bad this is. And until you both sit down and pull credit reports and you actually have real data in front of you, pull all three of them and you look and see who do you owe money to. And here's why you have to do it that way, because you don't trust him, because he keeps lying to you. He keeps telling you, no, this is it. And you find out there's a couch note, and then you find out there's another note. And here's the second problem. You tell him, hey, I'm so scared about our financial future. You know how you say those words to him? You're stupid. This plan doesn't work. Why don't you budget.
Dave Ramsey
You don't say those. Instead you say.
Financial Expert
Instead you say, I'm scared. But that's the way you talk to him. Hey, this is a dumb idea. And he doesn't hear that. He thinks, nope, you're dumb. And then here's where. And then he's hiding couch receipts somewhere instead of you saying, do you love me? Because if you do, I'm so, so scared about what happens next for us.
Caller
I just brought this up today, and I think this is what led me to the conversation of the call is.
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Caller
Think this is what led me to the conversation, or the call is, I heard. I just want to give you everything you want.
Financial Expert
It's not true. That is not true.
Dave Ramsey
That's a lie.
Caller
He's lying to you and is making me feel like, nope, he's lying to you.
I can literally live with an rv.
Get rid of everything. Let's get rid of the debt. Sell everything. These are the examples I have given him. Just, let's get rid of everything. We don't need. Pay off those cards, get back up, float and breathe. And none of that is being heard. And I don't know what to do.
Y' all.
Financial Expert
Let him see this right here.
Caller
He has. It's not working. I feel the devil is attacking and I don't know what to do.
Dave Ramsey
No, it's not a devil. It's your husband being a twerp. It's not the devil. Don't blame the devil. He's not that good at it. No, I think the two of you desperately need to sit down with a marriage counselor, because I predict that in six months, your marriage is going to be over if you don't deal with this issue because you're reaching. You're. You're getting close to that point where the switch is going to flip and you're going to look at him. And go, I'm done. You're dangerously close to that.
Financial Expert
Are some of your tears coming? Because you know that there's much more to come here.
Caller
So scared you're not listening. And I just. I try to help him lead and finding God, and it just was too much.
Dave Ramsey
How long y' all been married?
Caller
We've been together about seven, eight years and married a little over a year.
Financial Expert
What's he spending $60,000 on?
Caller
I don't know. He. For the last guy. I mean, however many years, he's. He's had a work injury, so he's put in on that. He said when he wasn't working, he put that on the credit cards and it just. I don't know. I don't. I just. What I don't see is why is it so difficult to get rid of material stuff so we can pay this debt off? I don't. To me, it's a no brainer, if that makes sense. You know, I can go with living in a little square with minimal stuff and let's just get rid of work really hard. I can't even go out and work because the excuses is a medical condition. Well, I'm willing to go through that medical condition and work just so we can pay this off. So how come he's not willing to do that? That's also.
Financial Expert
It could be any number of reasons, but I'm telling you right now, there's a. Listening to how you're mapping this thing out. I think there's other things going on. Whether he's got somebody else on the side, whether he's struggling with some sort of addiction, whether he's wrestling with some bigger demons. I think there's something else at play. And my gut tells me that you know that to be true.
Dave Ramsey
Also.
Financial Expert
I'm happy to be way wrong, but I think I'm right.
Caller
Yeah, you won't get help.
Financial Expert
Am I right?
Caller
Possibly. Yeah.
Financial Expert
Okay. Okay. So money here is. It's the lights flashing on the dashboard. Your marriage has way bigger issues.
Caller
How do you ask somebody to. You can't. You can lead a horse the water. You can't force him to drink.
Dave Ramsey
Y' all, it's not about the money. You guys need to go to marriage counseling this week or your marriage is going to end.
Financial Expert
Yeah, if he hasn't left you already. He just hasn't bothered to move out yet.
Dave Ramsey
Yeah, you guys. And if he. If, listen, you say, I'm scared and I can't get through to you and we can't get on the same page. We're going to have to have some outside help. I'm going to a marriage counselor. If you want to save our marriage, you should go with me. Yeah, and if he won't go with you, go anyway by yourself.
Financial Expert
And it's clear you've left me. If you want to save this marriage, you're going to come with me to this one.
Dave Ramsey
Yeah. You've got to rejoin me again. And we got to build something for the future, because the thing. That thing we were trying to do didn't work. It's a mess. And, you know, because, Andy, I've worked in this stuff for 30 years, and I'm not a marriage counselor. John is. But I do know that when people reach a certain point, the switch flips and you can't get them back. And I don't want that to happen to you. I want to catch you before the switch is and you're just done. Y' all go work on this before you're done. Create your free every dollar budget today. The simplest way to budget for your life.
**Podcast Summary: "I Predict In 6 Months Your Marriage Will Be Over"
The Ramsey Show Highlights
Release Date: June 5, 2025
Host: Ramsey Network
In the episode titled "I Predict In 6 Months Your Marriage Will Be Over," The Ramsey Show Highlights delves into the tumultuous financial struggles facing a caller's marriage. The discussion centers around overwhelming credit card debt, communication breakdowns, and the potential dissolution of the marriage if immediate action isn't taken. Hosted by Dave Ramsey and featuring insights from a financial expert, the episode offers both financial and relational guidance to listeners grappling with similar issues.
The episode begins with a distressed caller reaching out for help regarding her husband's escalating credit card debt. She estimates the total debt to be between $60,000 to $80,000, which continues to grow due to her husband's poor spending choices. The caller expresses frustration over her husband's preference for high-end purchases, such as a $4,000 couch instead of more economical options, which jeopardizes their shared financial goals, including buying a house.
Notable Quote:
"[00:06] Caller: ...my goal, our goal was supposed to be to get a house and move out of, you know, where we're at and the choices that he continues to make."
Dave Ramsey and the financial expert analyze the root causes of the couple's financial discord. They identify that the husband’s approach to money management is unilateral, treating the finances as a personal domain rather than a shared responsibility. This behavior fosters mistrust and undermines collaborative financial planning.
The caller mentions attempting to introduce budgeting tools like the EveryDollar app, which has been met with resistance. The financial expert underscores the necessity of both partners being transparent by reviewing all credit reports together to fully understand the extent of the debt and identify who the creditors are.
Notable Quotes:
"[02:18] Financial Expert: That's not where the problem lies...you don't trust him, because he keeps lying to you."
"[03:02] Financial Expert: I'm scared. But that's the way you talk to him. Hey, this is a dumb idea. And he doesn't hear that."
The conversation shifts from financial to relational issues as the financial expert suggests that the husband's actions may stem from deeper personal struggles, such as potential addiction or infidelity. This revelation adds complexity to the financial woes, indicating that money problems may be a symptom of broader marital discord.
Notable Quotes:
"[06:46] Financial Expert: ...whether he's got somebody else on the side, whether he's struggling with some sort of addiction, whether he's wrestling with some bigger demons."
Dave Ramsey delivers a sobering prognosis, stating that if the couple does not address their issues promptly, their marriage may end within six months. He emphasizes the importance of seeking marriage counseling immediately to prevent this outcome. Ramsey highlights that the financial issues are intertwined with the emotional and relational strain, making professional counseling imperative.
Notable Quotes:
"[04:49] Dave Ramsey: ...I predict that in six months, your marriage is going to be over if you don't deal with this issue..."
"[07:28] Caller: How do you ask somebody to... You can't force him to drink."
"[07:34] Dave Ramsey: Y' all, it's not about the money. You guys need to go to marriage counseling this week or your marriage is going to end."
The episode concludes with actionable steps for the caller and her husband:
Dave Ramsey reinforces the urgency of these steps to prevent the predicted marital breakdown, emphasizing that proactive measures can salvage both their financial health and relationship.
Notable Quote:
"[08:10] Dave Ramsey: ...I want to catch you before the switch is and you're just done. Y' all go work on this before you're done."
"I Predict In 6 Months Your Marriage Will Be Over" serves as a poignant reminder of how intertwined financial stability and marital harmony are. Through the caller's narrative, Dave Ramsey and the financial expert illustrate the cascading effects of unchecked debt and poor communication. The episode underscores the necessity of joint financial management, transparent dialogue, and professional counseling in navigating and resolving deep-seated marital and financial challenges.
By addressing both financial and relational aspects, The Ramsey Show Highlights provides a comprehensive approach to resolving marital financial crises, offering listeners valuable insights and practical solutions to safeguard their relationships and financial futures.