"I Want You Angry and Afraid Of Nothing"

Summary

The Ramsey Show Highlights: "I Want You Angry and Afraid Of Nothing"

Release Date: May 27, 2025

In the episode titled "I Want You Angry and Afraid Of Nothing," Dave Ramsey from the Ramsey Network provides critical financial guidance to a caller named Jordan, who is grappling with multiple debts and aggressive collection practices. This episode offers listeners a detailed roadmap for prioritizing expenses, managing debt, and maintaining emotional stability during financial turmoil.

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1. Introduction to Jordan’s Financial Struggles

Jordan reaches out to seek advice on handling his mounting debts and the pressure from a collection agency following a car repossession. He outlines his predicament:

• Income: Approximately $92,000 annually from his construction job.
• Debts: Includes a repossession, overdrafted checking accounts, Xfinity bills, and insurance payments.
• Family Situation: Sole provider for a family of four, making financial management even more critical.

Jordan admits, “being irresponsible with my money” ([00:45]), highlighting his awareness of the need for better financial stewardship.

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2. Assessing the Root Causes

Dave Ramsey begins by delving into the reasons behind Jordan’s financial woes. Jordan explains that job instability, specifically losing hours in construction after finding a new position, contributed to his falling behind on payments. Ramsey emphasizes the importance of taking responsibility as the first step towards financial recovery.

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3. Creating a Detailed Budget

Ramsey stresses the necessity of an organized and detailed budget to regain control over finances. He outlines a structured approach for Jordan to follow:

a. Prioritize Food and Household Necessities

“The number one thing in your budget before you buy anything else, is food at the grocery store. No food in restaurants. When you're in collections, you're broke. You don't get to go to a restaurant. A restaurant is a luxury.” ([01:42])

Ramsey advises that during financial hardship, eating out should be eliminated in favor of home-cooked meals, reducing expenses and ensuring the family’s basic needs are met.

b. Secure Essential Utilities

“You take care of water, lights, gas. You have the ability to operate your household with the utilities.” ([02:38])

Ensuring that electricity, water, and gas bills are current is crucial. Ramsey highlights that without these essentials, maintaining a stable household is impossible, and other debts become secondary.

c. Maintain Housing Payments

“You keep your house. Repo man can jump in the freaking creek.” ([04:20])

Jordan’s mortgage is $1,655, and he is in a trial repayment plan to catch up. Ramsey underscores the importance of keeping mortgage payments current to protect the family’s home from foreclosure and repossession.

d. Maintain Transportation

“You got a car to drive and gas in your car, you're not going out to eat, you've got food in the pantry.” ([05:51])

With a current car payment of $231, Ramsey recognizes the necessity of maintaining reliable transportation, which is vital for job stability and family logistics.

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4. Achieving Emotional Stability

Ramsey explains that by prioritizing essential expenses—food, utilities, housing, and transportation—Jordan can attain emotional stability. This foundation allows him to approach other financial challenges more calmly and effectively:

“Do you feel emotionally more stable?” ([06:17])
“Absolutely.” ([06:18])

Achieving this stability is key to resisting the emotional manipulation tactics often employed by debt collectors.

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5. Strategies for Dealing with Debt Collectors

A significant portion of the discussion focuses on handling aggressive debt collection practices, particularly from the repossession agency.

a. Understanding the Collector’s Tactics

Ramsey identifies that debt collectors often employ emotional tactics to intimidate and coerce payments:

“His job is to make you angry or afraid, and that moves him to the front of the line.” ([05:45])

b. Negotiation Techniques

Ramsey advises Jordan to adopt a firm stance when dealing with collectors:

“You call him and I want you to say, hey, I talked to my financial coach and he just told me to file bankruptcy.” ([07:50])

Alternatively, Ramsey suggests Jordan could declare his intention to settle for a fraction of the debt:

“You can settle for this idiot to the city for probably four grand, and he'll go away.” ([08:11])

These strategies aim to reduce the debt burden while reasserting control over his financial situation.

c. Setting Boundaries and Prioritizing

Ramsey emphasizes that Jordan must prioritize his family’s needs over the demands of debt collectors:

“Tell him you are getting your mortgage current where your babies live. You get to be at the back of that line.” ([04:20])

By asserting that household needs come first, Jordan can diminish the leverage debt collectors have over him.

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6. Conclusion and Final Advice

Ramsey concludes the episode by reinforcing the importance of establishing a solid financial foundation:

“I want you angry and afraid of nothing because your kids are fed, your house is current, and your lights are on.” ([05:45])

He encourages listeners to utilize budgeting tools like the EveryDollar app to maintain financial discipline and stay on track toward debt-free living.

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Notable Quotes

• Dave Ramsey: “No food in restaurants. A restaurant is a luxury. Mama be at home.” ([01:42])

• Dave Ramsey: “His job is to make you angry or afraid, and that moves him to the front of the line.” ([05:45])

• Dave Ramsey: “Tell him to bite me. Tell him I said to bite me.” ([04:34])

• Dave Ramsey: “I want you angry and afraid of nothing because your kids are fed, your house is current, and your lights are on.” ([05:45])

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Summary

In "I Want You Angry and Afraid Of Nothing," Dave Ramsey provides Jordan with a clear and actionable plan to navigate his financial difficulties. By prioritizing essential expenses, maintaining emotional control, and implementing strategic negotiation tactics with debt collectors, Jordan is guided towards regaining financial stability and ensuring his family's well-being. This episode serves as a valuable resource for listeners facing similar financial challenges, offering practical advice to overcome debt and reestablish control over their financial lives.

Transcript

[Dave Ramsey]

Brought to you by the EveryDollar app. Start budgeting for free today.

[Jordan]

Hey. So I'm just calling. So I've been watching the show last night. I would like some help maybe figuring out negotiation taxes for collectors. I've had a few things in collections for a couple years now that I've been paying on, but a repo car hit a collection company, and he's just coming at me hard. He wants, like, five grand down to make it, like a monthly pay. Lower monthly payment I can afford, or 800 bucks a month or a year and a half. And, you know, I'm a sole provider of a family of four, and so that kind of makes it difficult.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah. So what do you make, Jordan?

[Jordan]

About 92, 000 upwards? I make footage. So really just kind of, what? The construction.

[Dave Ramsey]

Why did you get behind?

[Jordan]

So I found a new job, construction fell behind where I was at and just kind of lost some hours and, you know, stuff like that. I can make excuses all day, but really just being irresponsible with my money.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay, that's a fair. That's a fair answer. Is the repo the only thing, or are there other collections?

[Jordan]

I have some, like, checking accounts that I overdrew going into collections, and some, like, Xfinity bills and insurance bills or stuff like that.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay. Okay, well, let's go back to the beginning, and then I'll answer your question. Okay, the beginning sounds like this. I want you to make a list of everything you're going to put on your budget, and I'm going to give you the order by which you attack it because you've been disorganized. Now, we're going to go the other extreme. We're going to get extremely detailed, extremely organized. Like, this is the detailed blueprint of the building you're building over there at the construction site. Okay. You with me? Okay. All right. So the first rule is you take care of your own household first. Now, what that means is the number one thing in your budget before you buy anything else, is food at the grocery store. No food in restaurants. When you're in collections, you're broke. You don't get to go to a restaurant. A restaurant is a luxury. Mama be at home. You're a sole income provider, so mama be cooking. Mama be home. Economist coupon clipping. She's going to be carrying all the economic weight she can carry while she's got those babies. Okay?

[Jordan]

Yes, sir.

[Dave Ramsey]

All right. She gonna sign up for that? You okay with that? She okay with that? Yeah.

[Jordan]

I think we can come to an agreement?

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah. All right. No. No eating out, no vacations. You're broke people till you're not broke people. You don't do that anymore. Food is first. Before you buy anything else, you feed your little kids. Before we talk about any idiot at the repo company, he's way down on my list of things to worry about for you. Big deal that you get these priorities straight. Second thing is, you take care of water, lights, gas. You have the ability to operate your household with the utilities. Are you behind with any of them?

[Jordan]

Just the electrical bill, but I have a plan to get that caught up.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay, you have a new plan. You're going to catch it up in the next check before you do anything else other than food.

[Jordan]

Yes, sir.

[Dave Ramsey]

It's the most important thing other than food. Lights, water, basic utilities. I don't give a crap about the cable bill. You can cut that junk off, you can live without Netflix. I'm not talking about that, but I'm talking about electricity, lights, water, gas. However, you're heating your house, right? So your family is now warm and they have lights and water and mama stove works so she can cook and you've got food. This is a big deal. Once you've. This is because this emotionally sets the table for you to fight these goobers that you've got on the other end of this thing. Okay? The next thing you do is you pay your rent or your mortgage. How much is that?

[Jordan]

My mortgage is 1655.

[Dave Ramsey]

Is it current?

[Jordan]

I'm guy in a trial repayment plan, so I paid three months to get caught up and put the equipment out on the back end.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay? Until you do that, I don't care if Repo man ever gets another dime. You keep your house. Repo man can jump in the freaking creek.

[Jordan]

Yes, sir.

[Dave Ramsey]

Tell him to bite. Tell him I said to bite me.

[Jordan]

He also threatening to sue me by the time.

[Dave Ramsey]

Oh, just have. Tell him. Have at it. Just get in line, buddy. Right now, I'm getting my mortgage current where my babies live. You get to be at the back of that line. Bite me. No. You don't get any money until my babies are fed and they have a place to live and the lights are on. That's your first job, man.

[Jordan]

Yes, sir.

[Dave Ramsey]

Because you're not going to make it emotionally if you. If you keep putting these idiots at the front of the line because they threaten you. If he wants to sue you, tell him to have at it. We'll just file chapter seven bankruptcy. He'll get nothing. Bite me. I'm serious. Okay. All right. This is how you got to talk to him. And you got to get it straight in your head what's most important he makes. His job is to make you angry or afraid, and that moves him to the front of the line. I want you angry and afraid of nothing because your kids are fed, your house is current, and your lights are on, and mama's got food in the pantry. Then. Then you live to. You can throw back your shoulders, and now we can fight like a man. But right now he's got you against the wall with his arm, with his hands around your throat. Emotionally, this is what these guys do. It's their job to get you on your heels. And I'm getting you back flat footed with your fist doubled up again. You ready?

[Jordan]

Yes, sir.

[Dave Ramsey]

All right, so you gotta. You got a good strong base here. And do you have a car payment?

[Jordan]

Currently, yes, sir.

[Dave Ramsey]

Currently?

[Jordan]

Yes, sir.

[Dave Ramsey]

How much is it?

[Jordan]

231.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay. Is it current?

[Jordan]

Yes.

[Dave Ramsey]

Really? I'm shocked. Good. We one down, baby. All right, we keep it current then. Okay, so if you've got a car to drive and gas in your car, you're not going out to eat, you've got food in the. And you got a place to live, do you feel emotionally more stable?

[Jordan]

Definitely.

[Dave Ramsey]

That's where you got to get to. That's. We call that building the four walls. Then and only then do we negotiate with other collectors. Okay? Now, when was the car repo? That repo man's bothering you about?

[Jordan]

February.

[Dave Ramsey]

And who. Who is the money owed to?

[Jordan]

Associated credit.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay.

[Jordan]

Collection company. Yeah, they bought the Question. Like the. The car. Original car company. Yeah, I was buying the car from. Yeah, they told me they would settle, come up to a settlement with me right after they auctioned the car. But literally right off the bat, they just sold the thing to the auction.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah. So here's what you tell the guy. You call him back. You can call him if you want to, or you cannot call him. I don't care. But I want you to call him and I want you to say, hey, I talked to my financial coach and he just told me to file bankruptcy. So here's what you're gonna get. It's nothing. Bite me. You get nothing. Not a zero. That's what you got, okay. Or you can shut the crap up and stand over on the sidelines until I get my family caught up, and then I'll come over and make you a cash offer. But these days of you telling me how my household runs are over, Bubba, and hang up right after you say that. Don't even negotiate with him. Just hang up. What you're doing is you're resetting the emotional table here to where we now know who's in charge of your money, and it's you, not him. You following me?

[Jordan]

Yes, sir.

[Dave Ramsey]

These guys are specialists at emotional terrorism. It's what they do for a living. Okay, because if he comes and sues you and takes your paycheck, you can file chapter seven bankruptcy. He'll get zero. I'm not recommending that because I. I think you can settle for this idiot to the city for probably four grand, and he'll go away. You remember what the deficit was on the repo?

[Jordan]

5,550 bucks.

[Dave Ramsey]

No, no, the total. The total owed to them after the sale of the car is what.

[Jordan]

I can't remember.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay, but he wants 5,000 up front and then $800 a month, right? So it must have been 10 or 15 grand.

[Jordan]

Yes, sir.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay, so they'll settle for a quarter on the dollar. So he'll probably take about four grand for this whole thing and walk away once you get him back on his seat. But now he's standing over the top of you. Create your free every dollar budget today. The simplest way to budget for your life.