Summary of "My Ex Was Living A Double Life And Left Us In Poverty" – The Ramsey Show Highlights
Episode Release Date: January 21, 2025
In this emotionally charged episode of The Ramsey Show Highlights, the Ramsey Network delves into the harrowing experience of a caller whose 15-year marriage unraveled due to her ex-husband’s deceitful actions, leading to severe financial and personal hardships. The episode provides a comprehensive look into the caller's struggles, the intersection of personal betrayal and financial instability, and the compassionate advice offered by the show's advisors.
Caller’s Background and Marital Turmoil
The caller begins by outlining the collapse of her 15-year marriage after discovering her husband’s infidelity and reckless financial behavior. She reveals that her husband was secretly engaging with women online and squandered thousands of dollars monthly on the stock market and gambling. This revelation came as a "huge shock" to both her and those around her, culminating in a divorce in October of the previous year.
Notable Quote:
“I discovered my husband was engaging with women online for most of our 15-year marriage and spending thousands and thousands every month on things like the stock market and gambling.” (00:11)
— Caller
Health Challenges and Employment Struggles
Shortly after her marriage, the caller contracted a severe virus, which left her with long-term health issues akin to Long Covid and chronic fatigue syndrome (CFS). Despite her disability, she managed to secure a fulfilling job during the COVID-19 pandemic. However, frequent illnesses forced her to exhaust her leave time, resulting in job loss. Currently, she is unemployed, relying solely on disability benefits and child support, while also dealing with the financial strain of maintaining her family home.
Notable Quote:
“I started working during COVID and was able to get back to a really good job that I loved. But over the past year, I’ve had to exhaust my leave time and ended up leaving completely because I had gotten sick so frequently.” (00:11 – 01:33)
— Caller
Financial Hardships Post-Divorce
Post-divorce, the caller faces significant financial instability. She owns a house awarded to her in the divorce, but maintaining it has become untenable without her ex-husband’s financial support. The mortgage of $2,200 per month far exceeds her current income from child support, which amounts to only $585 weekly. Additionally, unexpected expenses such as a house flood and construction overages have drained her limited resources, forcing her to borrow from her parents to stay afloat.
Notable Quote:
“I have three little kids and I do have this house which I got awarded in the divorce, but I’m kind of looking for next steps and what I should do because I didn’t accumulate a lot because of my situation.” (00:11 – 01:33)
— Caller
Emotional and Psychological Impact
The caller expresses profound emotional distress stemming from her husband’s betrayal and the subsequent loss of trust. This emotional turmoil has exacerbated her chronic health conditions, leading to frequent illnesses such as shingles and mood fluctuations. She shares feelings of self-doubt and frustration, questioning how she failed to recognize her husband's deceit earlier.
Notable Quote:
“It was like complete fail. And like how could I not know?” (02:19 – 02:24)
— Caller
Advisors' Guidance and Support
The show's advisors respond with empathy and practical advice. They acknowledge the caller's dire situation and the complexity of her challenges, emphasizing the need for drastic measures to stabilize her finances. Advisors suggest exploring options such as selling the house, seeking SSI (Supplemental Security Income) support with legal assistance, and considering relocation to a more affordable area. They also recommend leveraging support from family members and utilizing Ramsey Network resources like Financial Peace University and EveryDollar to create a sustainable budget.
Notable Quotes:
“You don't have any options. I know, but you don’t have. Or they, they sell the condo and move in with you.” (05:38 – 05:43)
— Advisor
“And we're going to hook you up with Financial Peace University and EveryDollar, Jennifer, that's going to give you the information you need, the motivation, the budgeting tool so that this week you can look at my bills. What is the income, and can I get through this without going into debt?” (09:09 – 09:26)
— Co-Advisor
Hope and Encouragement
Despite the bleak circumstances, the advisors provide a message of hope, encouraging the caller to harness her inner strength and resilience. They express confidence in her ability to overcome her current hardships and rebuild a stable and peaceful life for herself and her children.
Notable Quotes:
“We believe in you.” (08:09 – 08:17)
— Advisor
“You've got strength and power inside of you that has been squashed and stomped on. I know this sounds bonkers, but my guess is you're going to... have peace in your home that you haven't had in ages.” (08:17 – 09:00)
— Advisor
Conclusion
The episode poignantly highlights the intersection of personal betrayal, health issues, and financial instability, illustrating the profound impact these factors can have on an individual's life. Through compassionate dialogue and practical advice, the Ramsey Show offers a roadmap for navigating such multifaceted challenges, emphasizing the importance of resilience, support systems, and strategic financial planning.