The Ramsey Show Highlights

Episode: "My Husband Co-Signed For A Coworker And Didn't Tell Me (They're Behind On Payments)"
Date: November 26, 2025
Host: Ramsey Network
Featured Experts: Financial Advisor, Marriage Counselor

Episode Overview

In this episode, a caller grapples with the fallout of her husband secretly co-signing on a car loan for a coworker—a loan now badly overdue, tied to a trashed vehicle, and threatening her marriage and finances. The hosts dig into the roots of the problem, balancing practical financial advice with an emphatic call for marital counseling.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Hidden Debt

• Caller reveals she discovered her husband secretly co-signed an auto loan for a coworker three years ago, now behind on payments due to the coworker's addiction.
• The couple’s finances have been separate for years due to past money issues, and this new revelation deepens the divide.

  "Three days ago I found out that he... had been keeping a secret for three years that he co-signed on an auto loan with a coworker that I have never met to this day." —Caller, 00:22

2. State of the Loan and Vehicle

• The husband is unclear about the loan’s amount ($20,000–$21,000 owed), while the car itself is in poor condition—likely worth only $5,000 at auction.
• The hosts clarify that since the husband’s name is on the loan, he (and by extension the caller) could be responsible for the debt after repossession and auction.

3. Marriage Strain & Communication Breakdown

• The couple previously split finances to avoid marital rupture but have struggled to come back together.

• The caller expresses deep frustration at the recurring financial betrayals, despite her love for her husband.

  "Every time I try to get ahead, I feel like I'm... I love him dearly, but he's a bit too much of a nice guy making the wrong decisions." —Caller, 01:59

• The hosts urge the caller to seek professional counseling, highlighting that the issue transcends finances.

4. Recognition of Behavioral Patterns

• Hosts probe whether the husband’s decisions stem from a "character issue," trauma, or a tendency to be an "unhealthy pleaser"—always risking too much to help others.

  “So he's an unhealthy pleaser.” —Financial Advisor, 04:49

  “But not for you, weirdly enough...” —Marriage Counselor, 04:53

• The caller confirms her husband’s chronic over-generosity, often to strangers rather than family.

5. The Need for Help and Boundaries

• The experts strongly recommend therapy—both for the couple and for the husband individually—to address patterns before considering financial recombination or future decision-making.

  “You need somebody to get in between that because this has been a wild ride for you.” —Marriage Counselor, 03:19

  “He just needs to figure out the person he actually needs to please a little bit more. Is you.” —Financial Advisor, 05:09

6. Practical Next Steps

• Confirm exactly what’s owed on the loan and the vehicle’s current value.
• Begin saving to cover the expected loss after repossession/auction.
• Establish a united front with joint decision-making, but only after investing in relationship repair and counseling.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On discovering the secret:

  “And yeah, and that coworker, who he doesn’t even work with anymore, is struggling with addiction, so they are not making their payments. And he finally told me, my husband, there tail between his legs...” —Caller, 00:38

• On recurring patterns:

  “Sometimes I describe it like, if we were to go to a store and he held the door open for somebody, I might be the third person he let in. But then he's also going to stand there and continue to hold the door open for 80 people, and I’m going to be standing there like, okay, honey, can. Can we go?” —Caller, 04:25

• On prioritizing family:

  “He just needs to figure out the person he actually needs to please a little bit more. Is you.” —Financial Advisor, 05:09

• On the urgency of counseling:

  “You have to say to him, never again if you want to be in this marriage. We have to get this solved. We have to heal together.” —Financial Advisor, 05:52

Important Timestamps

• 00:22 — Caller reveals the secret co-signed loan
• 01:59 — Caller on financial separation and ongoing difficulties
• 03:00–03:19 — Marriage Counselor detects emotional exhaustion and calls for professional help
• 04:49–05:09 — Hosts discuss unhealthy pleasing tendencies
• 06:28 — Action plan for handling the repossession and financial fallout

Summary and Takeaways

• Financial Infidelity: The husband’s secretive decision created a new rift in an already strained marriage, demonstrating the high stakes of financial infidelity.
• Marriage First: Experts urge that healing the marriage—with outside help—is even more urgent than resolving the money mess.
• Accepting Loss, Planning Ahead: The callers are encouraged to prepare for financial consequences but only in tandem with addressing the relational root causes.
• A Call to Action: The conversation ends with powerful advice: Fight for the marriage first, then the finances, and don’t delay getting professional help.

This episode offers a candid, compassionate look at how financial and relational troubles often go hand in hand—and why addressing both, with professional support, is crucial for true recovery.