My Husband Gave Away All Of Our Retirement In A Scam

Summary

The Ramsey Show Highlights

Episode: My Husband Gave Away All Of Our Retirement In A Scam
Date: August 24, 2025
Host: Ramsey Network – Financial Coaches, George Kamel
Caller: Mary

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Episode Overview

This episode revolves around a heartfelt call from Mary, a 75-year-old listener, who shares the harrowing story of her husband falling victim to a cryptocurrency scam that devastated their retirement savings. The financial coaches guide Mary through her fears, particularly around taxes, and offer support and next steps to help them recover. The episode is a cautionary tale about financial scams and the importance of boring, stable financial advice.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Mary's Situation: The Scam and Its Fallout

• Retirement Savings Lost:

  • Mary's husband invested over $500,000 of their retirement savings into a scam, followed by borrowing an additional $250,000 in attempts to “get out” of the scheme.
  • The scam was facilitated through someone her husband used to work with, involving cryptocurrency.
  • Additional debts were accrued via personal and reverse mortgage loans, including borrowing from their son (over $80,000) and other sources.
  • They reported the scam to the FBI, police, and Justice Department but do not expect recovery.

• Current Financial Situation:

  • Both are in their 70s.
  • Working multiple part-time jobs; leveraging Social Security (approx. $5,000/mo) and additional income ($500–$1,000/mo from jobs).
  • Held a garage sale to pay bills; sold $218 worth in a day.
  • Took out a reverse mortgage to further pay down debts.
  • Despite hardships, have managed to pay last year's taxes and received a federal refund to pay state taxes.

2. Immediate Concerns & Tax Implications

• Mary’s Primary Worry:

  • Ongoing fear of more tax problems from the liquidation of their retirement accounts.

• Coaches’ Guidance:

  • Assert the largest tax liabilities should be resolved if last year’s taxes were paid as claimed.
  • Urge Mary to verify all paperwork regarding retirement liquidation with her husband.
  • Emphasize necessity of professional tax help to double-check all filings and ensure no outstanding surprises.

• Referral to Professional Help:

  • Coaches promise to connect Mary with a Ramsey Trusted Pro (tax professional) for hands-on help.
  • Offer a free hour with a Ramsey financial coach to help map out next steps.

3. Reconstructing What Happened

• Chain of Scamming and Debt:

  • Scammers continually asked for more payments, claiming they were for fees or taxes.
  • Multiple loans were taken out—including personal, from companies, family loans, and reverse mortgage—to meet the scammers' escalating demands.

• How the Scam Unfolded:

  • A former acquaintance reached out to her husband with a “great opportunity.”
  • Primary investment was funneled into crypto, which made it harder to track and recover.
  • Multiple attempts to involve law enforcement have yielded little hope due to the nature of crypto scams.

4. Practical and Emotional Support

• Commendation for Resilience:

  • Coaches praise Mary's resourcefulness, grit, and her refusal to give up.
  • Acknowledge the trauma and overwhelming nature of the situation but stress Mary is “doing everything right” under the circumstances.

• Future Guidance:

  • Immediate focus should be on budgeting, income stabilization, and working closely with professionals.
  • Encourage Mary not to shoulder the complexity alone—accept all help offered through the Ramsey Network.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

On Empathy and the Sting of Scams

Financial Coach 1 (01:20):
“Gosh, Mary. Oh, I'm so sorry… Oh, Mary.”

On Tax Documentation and Vigilance

Financial Coach 1 (03:44):
“Do you have evidence of that, Mary? Like, I would want to see documentation here on out from him… I just want to make sure that things are actually happening the way he says.”

How the Scam Persists

Mary (04:11):
“He tried to get out of this thing, I think, and they kept saying, oh, well, you need to pay these fees and you need to pay this tax. So he kept borrowing money… in reality he was just giving them more money.”

Coaching for Next Steps

Financial Coach 1 (04:47):
“And a financial coach on us… Just to get an hour with, to sort through all this.”

On Mary’s Resourcefulness and Attitude

Financial Coach 2 (08:47):
“Listen, Mary, you are, you're a gangster. Like your attitude in all this is stellar. The fact that you're willing to go back to work, you're doing garage sales, you're doing a lot. I am proud of you. I'm sorry that this happened.”

Core Ramsey Advice on Avoiding Scams

Financial Coach 1 & Mary (09:16–09:34):

• Coach 1: “And guys, listen, please listen. If something sounds too good to be true, it is... just be boring.”
• Mary: “This is why.”
• Coach 1: “Yeah, this is why. Please, just like be boring.”
• Coach 2: “That's right.”

The Broader Lesson

Financial Coach 1 (09:41):
“So slow and steady wins the race. You guys, don't fall for this crap. In the crypto world, it's everywhere… and they prey on the elderly. This is it.”

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Important Timestamps

• 00:06 – Mary explains what happened: the scam, loss of $500,000+ retirement, and $250,000 more in debt.
• 01:20 – Coaches express empathy, ask clarifying questions, and explore ages and tax concerns.
• 02:45 – Detailed questioning about the retirement loss and tax payment timeline.
• 03:44 – Alert to verify documentation on retirement liquidation.
• 04:11 – Mary reveals scam tactics and escalation of borrowed money.
• 04:37 – Coaches offer connection with professional tax preparer and financial coach.
• 05:16 – Call tracing the scam back to a former acquaintance, movement through crypto, and reporting to authorities.
• 07:13 – Coaches urge Mary to commit to accepting help.
• 07:28 – Guidance to focus beyond taxes and look at the bigger picture with professional help.
• 08:01 – Mary outlines current monthly income sources and ongoing work.
• 08:47 – Coaches commend Mary’s perseverance (“You are, you're a gangster…”).
• 09:16–09:49 – Warning to listeners: “If it sounds too good to be true, it is… be boring… crypto scams prey on the elderly.”

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Tone & Closing Thoughts

The tone is highly compassionate, supportive, and realistic—reflecting both the gravity of Mary’s story and the Ramsey Network’s hallmark practical approach. There’s a strong theme of resilience, with Mary’s determination in the face of devastation standing out. The coaches reinforce the importance of skepticism, professional help, and boring financial strategies, especially for vulnerable populations.

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For those who haven’t listened:
This episode is a powerful and sobering guide on the realities of financial scams, particularly targeting retirees, and a rallying call for methodical, boring, and safe money management. Mary’s experience, the coaches' clear direction, and the broader lessons shared will resonate deeply with anyone navigating financial uncertainty or worried about the prevalence of “too good to be true” investment pitches.

Transcript

[Host/Announcer]

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[Mary (Caller)]

Well, about a year and a half ago, my husband got involved with some online investment deal which turned out to be a scam. They just. He gave away all our retirement, and then he borrowed another. About $250,000 more to get out of it. So I wake up every day worried. But my question was about tax. I'm worried about next year's federal, state taxes. Are we going to start owing a lot of money? We were sort of going, okay, we got two jobs each. We paid off a lot of the debt. We're working on it. We paid off about half of it. But I just keep worrying the other shoe's gonna drop. And I worry about taxes. We paid last year's taxes. We were able to pay our federal taxes, I think. And then we got a refund, a federal refund, which we use to pay our state taxes. But I'm just wondering, you know, how should we proceed from here?

[Financial Coach 1]

Gosh, Mary. Oh, I'm so sorry. How old are you guys?

[Mary (Caller)]

Well, that's the problem. I'm 75. He's 72. I'm.

[Financial Coach 2]

I'm so sorry.

[Financial Coach 1]

Oh, Mary. Okay, so your. Your worry is about taxes is what you're saying, first and foremost.

[Mary (Caller)]

And, well, I'm thinking, yeah, everything, like, we're doing okay. We're paying this stuff off. We got a reverse mortgage on the house, which gave us some money, you know, but that was another. That was $250,000. Now, that is against our.

[Financial Coach 1]

Yeah, yeah, you went back equity.

[Financial Coach 2]

Oh, gosh. Okay, so you lost three times. Can you tell me how much was in the retirement that was lost?

[Host/Announcer]

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[Financial Coach 2]

Take.

[Host/Announcer]

Get the deal. All right, back to the call.

[Financial Coach 2]

Can you Tell me how much was in the retirement that was lost. I hate to rehash it.

[Mary (Caller)]

It was. I. Well, that's the thing. I think there was about a little over 500,000.

[Financial Coach 2]

Okay. And that was not this year. That was the previous year. So you said you already paid the taxes on him liquidating that, is that correct?

[Mary (Caller)]

I guess so. You know, the thing is, every time I talk to him, I can't handle it. But he told me we were able to pay the 2024 taxes.

[Financial Coach 2]

Okay.

[Mary (Caller)]

So this started in April 2024. So we paid the 2024 taxes.

[Financial Coach 2]

This, this year. You did that. You did that in January this year, Right.

[Mary (Caller)]

Okay, that in January.

[Financial Coach 2]

So you should be off the hook for the largest amount. If, if, if everything happened the way you said it did and that money was spent and used up in 2024 and 20. Maybe 2023. I'm not sure.

[Financial Coach 1]

Yeah. Do you have evidence of that, Mary? Like I would want to see documentation here on out from him. I know he's saying that's a good thing, but I'm like, I just want to make sure that things are actually happening the way he says. Because to pay taxes on that, I mean, that's a, that's a lot of cash. I mean, if you liquidated half a million dollars from your retirement.

[Financial Coach 2]

Well, is that what he borrowed the money for, to pay taxes?

[Mary (Caller)]

No, no. He tried to get out of this thing, I think, and he, they kept saying, oh, well, you need to pay these fees and you need to pay this tax. So he kept borrowing money and giving to them, thinking it was getting them out of this scam, but in reality he was just giving them more money.

[Financial Coach 2]

Are you working, Are you, is you or your husband working with the tax professional?

[Mary (Caller)]

No.

[Financial Coach 2]

Okay, today. And we're going to make sure Kelly's going to pick up. We're going to make sure you're going to get hooked up with one of our Ramsey trusted pros. We'll find a tax provider in your area that's going to help you.

[Financial Coach 1]

And a financial coach on us.

[Financial Coach 2]

Yes.

[Financial Coach 1]

Just to get an hour with, to sort through all this. Because depending on to Jade's point, because he borrowed money for what? Like I know he liquidated the retirement. Why did he borrow 250,000?

[Mary (Caller)]

Because they told him these scammers.

[Financial Coach 1]

Oh, he went into more of the scam, the 250.

[Mary (Caller)]

Yeah, yeah. He built. He, they kept saying, has this been.

[Financial Coach 1]

Have they been. Is it a. Who is it. Is it a. I mean, is it a company? Is It. A person, like a financial advisor? Like who?

[Mary (Caller)]

No.

[Financial Coach 2]

Yeah. Where do you find them?

[Mary (Caller)]

It. Okay, so my understanding is some guy he used to work with back then called him and said, hey, I've got this great thing going on. Do you want to get in on it and I'll have my girl call you? Which she did. And he started investing. Now, the investment went through a cryptocurrency, so he had to give it to this account, and it turned crypto, and then it went. Now, we reported this whole thing to the, I don't know, the FBI and the police and the Justice Department or something, but.

[Financial Coach 1]

Because sometimes there can be lawsuits out of all of this. I can't. Like, I wonder if there's anything.

[Mary (Caller)]

I don't think we can find these people.

[Financial Coach 1]

He's done. Okay.

[Mary (Caller)]

Yeah, I mean, we have the. Okay, so we gave the information.

[Financial Coach 1]

The 250. Mary, was that. That when you said you bought. You guys. He borrowed 250. Was that a personal loan or was that against the house? Was that the reverse mortgage?

[Mary (Caller)]

It was many things. He had 69,000 from a company, you know. You know, to borrow. I don't know if I could say names of companies. The bad thing is he borrowed 88,000 in my. My son got 80, gave him 88,000, which he turned in some of his. He's a big crypto guy. He did a personal loan from somebody for 30. He went. He took personal loans, he ran.

[Financial Coach 1]

Okay, so this is. This was beyond the 250,000 dol 50s, beyond the reverse mortgage, the money you guys got out of the house.

[Mary (Caller)]

Well, then when this all happened, we got a reverse mortgage to pay some of this off.

[Financial Coach 1]

Okay, got it.

[Financial Coach 2]

Okay, listen, you've got. This is way more than we can unravel in this few minutes. You've got. Just promise me, promise me that when we give you this help that you're going to take it and please, please. I just.

[Financial Coach 1]

The taxes is not what I would. I mean, I understand that you would worry about those, but. But for you guys in your future, I'm like, there's just. There's. There's bigger things happening, and I know the urgency for you is the taxes next year, but getting. You'll get. You'll get answers with the tax professionals. They look at all of it to make sure what was paid out of that specific, like that retirement account for me. And then obviously that you guys are keeping up with your, you know, paying state and federal, which is what you're doing.

[Financial Coach 2]

Um, and you're working. You've got money coming in. You've probably got Social Security coming. And how much is coming in every month for you, Mary?

[Mary (Caller)]

Well, our Social Security is about 5,000. A little over 5,000. And then our part time jobs, you know, it's so hard to say. We're maybe five to maybe $1,000 a month between all of our part time jobs. In the winter when the resorts start opening, we have a job there which pays well and so we'll make be making more money, but we are working as much as we can. I had a garage sale today. I just got $218 this morning. So all of that goes to paying charge cards, bills.

[Financial Coach 2]

Listen, Mary, you are, you're a gangster. Like your, your attitude in all this is stellar. The fact that you're willing to go back to work, you're doing garage sales, you're doing a lot. I am proud of you. I'm sorry that this happened. We're gonna make sure that you get everything you need in your corner so that you guys can keep fighting through this. It sounds like you do need a budget. You need every dollar. We're gonna make sure you have that the best version of it. So that you can see where every dime of this hard earned money is gonna go, because you're gonna need it. Yeah.

[Financial Coach 1]

And guys, listen, please listen. If something sounds too good to be true, it is. And I know people always kind of rag that our advice is like so boring and it's just not new. And into all the cool new things.

[Mary (Caller)]

This is why.

[Financial Coach 1]

Yeah, this is why. Please, just like be boring.

[Mary (Caller)]

Be boring.

[Financial Coach 1]

And if there's something that's like, oh my God, this is amazing. This, there's a spirit of greed in that too. It should be a red flag.

[Financial Coach 2]

That's right.

[Financial Coach 1]

Okay. So slow and steady wins the race. You guys, don't fall for this crap. In the crypto world, it's everywhere.

[Financial Coach 2]

Everywhere, everywhere.

[Financial Coach 1]

And they prey on the elderly. This is it.

[Financial Coach 2]

This is literally it. So sad.

[Host/Announcer]

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