My Mom Is Wrecking My Rental Property, Should I Kick Her Out?

Summary

The Ramsey Show Highlights

Episode: My Mom Is Wrecking My Rental Property, Should I Kick Her Out?
Release Date: August 6, 2025
Host: Ramsey Network
Participants: Dave Ramsey, Rachel Cruze, Dr. John Delony, George Kamel, Jade Warshaw

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Introduction to Wesley's Dilemma

Wesley approaches the show with a challenging personal and financial situation: his mother has been living in his rental property without paying rent for the past five months. The episode delves into the complexities of balancing familial obligations with financial responsibilities.

Wesley's Opening Statement:
"Do I kick my mom out of my rental? I know legally the answer is going to be yes, but I'm having trouble with the emotional part of it."
(00:27)

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Understanding the Background

Wesley provides context about his family dynamics and the arrangement following his father's passing nearly two years ago. There was an informal agreement between Wesley and his brother: if their mother were to pass first, Wesley would take care of her, and vice versa. However, since their father passed away first, Wesley found himself responsible for his mother.

Rachel Cruze's Empathetic Response:
"Sorry for your loss... You lost a handshake deal."
(01:34 - 01:27)

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Financial Breakdown of the Rental Property

The discussion shifts to the financial aspects of the rental property. Wesley charges his mother $1,500 monthly, which covers the HOA fees, insurance, property taxes, and utilities. Given the average rental in the community is around $3,300, Wesley isn't losing money on the property itself.

John Delony's Insight:
"I'm not seeing you're losing money on this deal."
(02:27 - 02:29)

Despite the property being paid off, Wesley expresses concern over his fluctuating income from his real estate career, especially with the market slowing down. His emergency fund, which covers three years, is gradually depleting as the situation continues.

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Emotional Struggles and Seeking Advice

Wesley's primary concern is the emotional toll of evicting his mother. He struggles with feelings of being an enabler and fears the repercussions of ending the living arrangement.

Wesley's Admission:
"I think I'm at my wit's end here with her."
(03:34)

Rachel Cruze advises that dealing with the situation will inevitably involve navigating a range of emotions, including anger, sadness, and loneliness. She emphasizes the importance of confronting these feelings head-on rather than avoiding them.

Rachel Cruze's Guidance:
"The only way to deal with those emotions is to actually walk through them... it's time for you to step up and be an adult."
(03:45 - 04:15)

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Analyzing the Mother's Financial Situation

Dr. John Delony examines the root cause of the issue: Wesley's mother's inability to pay rent stems from her insufficient income and poor financial management. Despite earning approximately $2,300 monthly, her spending habits have led her to file for bankruptcy three times.

Dr. John Delony's Assessment:
"She's gone through financial peace and failed miserably because she's filed bankruptcy three times."
(05:19 - 05:25)

Given her financial instability and lack of reliable income, Dr. Delony advises that retaining her as a tenant is not sustainable. He suggests that Wesley should help her find alternative housing, even if it means facing eviction more harshly by another landlord.

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Final Recommendations and Emotional Closure

Rachel Cruze reiterates that until Wesley's mother can demonstrate responsible financial behavior, the situation cannot improve. She expresses sympathy for Wesley's predicament but underscores the necessity of enforcing the terms of the rental agreement for everyone's well-being.

Rachel Cruze's Conclusion:
"Help her find another place. But until her behavior changes, nobody can do anything. And that's what really stinks."
(05:34 - 05:45)

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Key Takeaways

1. Financial Responsibility: Even when dealing with family, it's crucial to uphold financial agreements to ensure mutual respect and sustainability.
2. Emotional Processing: Confronting difficult decisions involves navigating complex emotions, but avoiding them can lead to more significant issues.
3. Support Systems: Seeking advice from financial and emotional experts can provide clarity and actionable steps in challenging situations.
4. Long-Term Planning: Maintaining an emergency fund and having contingency plans can alleviate financial stress during unforeseen circumstances.

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Notable Quotes

• "It's time for you to step up and be an adult. And your mom's acting like a child."
  — Rachel Cruze (04:15)

• "She's gone through financial peace and failed miserably because she's filed bankruptcy three times."
  — Dr. John Delony (05:25)

• "The only way to deal with those emotions is to actually walk through them."
  — Rachel Cruze (03:45)

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Conclusion

Wesley's situation highlights the delicate balance between family obligations and financial prudence. The experts on The Ramsey Show Highlights provide a blend of empathy and practical advice, emphasizing the importance of setting boundaries and making tough decisions for long-term well-being. This episode serves as a valuable resource for anyone facing similar dilemmas, offering insights into handling both the financial and emotional aspects of such challenges.

Transcript

[Dave Ramsey]

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[Wesley]

I got a. I got a Silver Squatter question problem for you.

[Rachel Cruze]

A what?

[John Delony]

Silver Squatter.

[Wesley]

Squatter.

[Rachel Cruze]

Is that one of the superheroes in this Fantastic Four, or is that somebody else? Oh, no, that's a Silver Surfer.

[John Delony]

Very different.

[Rachel Cruze]

Oh, see, I got confused for a second. Silver Squatter. Okay, tell us more.

[Wesley]

Here's. Here's my question. Do I kick my mom out of my rental? I know league. I know the legal answer is going to be yes, but I'm. I'm having trouble with the emotional part of it.

[Rachel Cruze]

Tell me about the legal. Tell me about the legal piece.

[Wesley]

Well, she haven't paid rent in five months.

[John Delony]

Why is that?

[Rachel Cruze]

Because. Because she birthed him.

[John Delony]

She's like, I'm not paying you jack squat.

[Wesley]

Yeah. So the backstory is my dad passed away, and she was living with him for the past 12 years, but they weren't married, so they were just cohabitating together. And when my dad passed, I had a handshake deal with my brother that said if my mom passed first, my brother would take care of my dad. If my dad passed first, I would take care of my mom, because we're a family of dysfunction.

[John Delony]

Okay, so you lost a bet, essentially. And here we are.

[Rachel Cruze]

Pretty much the very setup of that whole thing is, first of all, how. How long ago did your dad pass away?

[Wesley]

Coming up on two years.

[Rachel Cruze]

Okay, well, sorry for your loss. I didn't want to skate over that deal. So you lost a handshake deal and is. Have you confronted mom in any time?

[Wesley]

Many times.

[Rachel Cruze]

Oh, you have? Times over the last five months. And what is her response?

[Wesley]

Oh, she. It's. It's just always an excuse with her. And I think. I know I'm. I'm an enabler. I. I can admit it. That I just. I can't get myself to finally pull the trigger and kicking her out because. What are you worried about Mom.

[Rachel Cruze]

Right.

[John Delony]

But you already changed that relationship when she became your tenant, correct?

[Wesley]

Yeah.

[Rachel Cruze]

And a not good tip.

[Wesley]

Yes, correct.

[John Delony]

Okay. What is the rent you're charging her?

[Wesley]

1500. And that literally just pays for HOA. Insurance, property taxes, utilities.

[John Delony]

I'm not seeing you're losing money on this deal.

[Wesley]

Oh, of course. Yeah. The average rental in that community is like 3300.

[Rachel Cruze]

And what are you. What are you on the hook for personally on this property? Every month.

[Wesley]

Zero. Every month. It's about a thousand bucks just for the HOA taxes. It's paid off.

[John Delony]

Okay. Okay, great. So you're not bleeding money from this.

[Rachel Cruze]

Well, I mean, a thousand bucks a month more than a scrape, so. Okay.

[Wesley]

However, with that, with my, with the career, I'm also a real estate agent. And our area, it's really slowing down right now. And so I have, you know, I have my emergency fund, but my emergency fund is three years, just in case something like this were to happen. But I can see that every month the account, you know, dropping lower and lower and lower. And we're not in the red zone yet. Like, we're not. We're not totally scared. But the reason I have these rentals that are paid off is to be my table.

[Rachel Cruze]

You don't have to sell us on that income. What did you call us for? Because I think you, you know what we think. What, what can we do for you today? We have about a minute and a half.

[Wesley]

Yeah, I just. How can I emotionally get over sending her the notice of 30 days to get out? Because I'm just. I think I'm at my wit's end here with her.

[Rachel Cruze]

Well, the way you emotionally get over it is you walk through it. And so it's gonna suck. I can't sit here and tell you all the different range of emotions. You're probably going to be a little bit angry at her. You already, already are angry at her. You're going to be sad. Based on what she says and does, you might feel a little lonely. I mean, I could go through all this long list of emotions. I don't know what you're going to feel. But the only way to deal with those emotions is to actually walk through them. And you're afraid of them right now. And I understand that. But you're just going to have to deal with it because here's where this is going. Just let your mind wander. Six months from now, a year from now, two years from now, what this is going to feel like. Just let your mind go there. And that's going to be toxic sewage far worse than any emotion you're going to face right now. So it's time for you to step up and be an adult. And your mom's acting like a child. Come up with a plan. You and your brother need to stop doing shake hand bets and figure out how we're going to take care of mom and in this situation and then be good sons. But she doesn't get to rent for free anymore, and it's time for her to move on.

[John Delony]

And you can help her with the root of the problem, which is she can't afford her bills. And what's the cause of that? Is she working full time?

[Wesley]

She's not working full time. She is working like her. Her monthly income is just around 2300 bucks.

[John Delony]

Okay, so it's either pay rent or put food on the table and cover my other bills.

[Wesley]

Pretty much.

[John Delony]

Not like she's out of control spending. So let's see if we can get her income.

[Wesley]

Okay, she is out of control spending. She's gone through financial peace and failed miserably because she's filed bankruptcy three times.

[John Delony]

Oh my goodness. And so for those reasons, I would not have her as a tenant. She needs to go find rent elsewhere and where she's going to get evicted by someone much meaner than you.

[Rachel Cruze]

And you can't help her at this point. Help her find another place. But until her behavior changes, nobody can do anything. And that's what really stinks. So sorry Wesley that you're going through this.

[Dave Ramsey]

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