My Mom Took Out Student Loans in My Name for Someone Else

Summary

The Ramsey Show Highlights

Episode Summary: "My Mom Took Out Student Loans in My Name for Someone Else"

Date: January 16, 2026
Hosts: Dave Ramsey, Rachel Cruze
Caller: Amanda (23 years old)

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Overview

In this emotionally-charged episode, a young caller seeks urgent advice after discovering her mother took out student loans in her name—one of which she knew about (but suspects questionable use of funds), and a second, much larger loan, which she had no knowledge of and did not consent to. Hosts Dave Ramsey and Rachel Cruze guide the caller through the complex legal, financial, and emotional ramifications, exploring next steps and setting healthy boundaries for the future.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Discovery of the Debt and Initial Confusion

• Caller’s Situation: Amanda recently learned about a second $20,000 student loan taken out in her name without her knowledge, in addition to a prior $20,000 loan she agreed to but now suspects was partially misused.
• Notable Insight: Amanda only learned of the fraud after receiving a credit alert, since she otherwise has no debt. This triggered the entire revelation.
  • “My bank has a credit alert, credit score alert, and it popped up that my credit had gone down, and I didn’t even know I had a credit score because I have no other debt.” — Ramsey Caller (04:46)

2. Unraveling What Happened & Who Benefitted

• Dave’s Probing: Dave and Rachel press for details on how the funds were used, questioning if Amanda’s mother or siblings benefitted.
• Caller’s Facts: Amanda lived cheaply and is certain that the additional amounts could not possibly reflect her living or educational expenses.
  • “There’s no way that my living expenses were $20,000 for that year because the only thing she was paying was my rent. Shabby place that was shared with 10 girls.” — Ramsey Caller (00:36)

3. Fraudulent Loan and Legal Definitions

• Fraud Clarified: Dave is direct in stating that if Amanda’s name was used without her knowledge, it is fraud—even if it’s a parent.
  • “You didn’t sign it, and someone else signed your name. That’s called fraud.” — Dave Ramsey (02:13)
• Rachel’s Guidance: Suggests Amanda requests the promissory note from the loan company to check the signature and get concrete facts before moving forward.
  • “Have you seen the promissory note? Because you can go back and see who signed it.” — Rachel Cruze (03:22)

4. Breaking the News and Family Dynamics

• Caller’s Avoidance: Amanda has not confronted her mother due to their poor relationship and anticipation of deflection or tears.
• Parental Divorce Context: The parents are recently divorced, which may be a contributing factor to the mother’s behavior.
• Dave’s Empathy: Expresses understanding for the complexity of confronting family over such a serious issue.

5. Actionable Solutions & Their Consequences

• Two Distasteful Options:
  • 1. Report as Identity Theft:
    • File with the loan servicer, obtain the police report, and potentially have the mother prosecuted.
    • “That would entail taking out a police report and reporting her to law enforcement. For being a criminal. Because she is, by the way, a criminal.” — Dave Ramsey (05:30)
  • 2. Pay the Debt:
    • Accept responsibility for the debt to keep the peace, despite the unfairness.
    • Both options are described as “ugly” and undesirable.

6. Setting Hard Boundaries for the Future

• Dave’s Urgent Advice: Regardless of her choice, Amanda needs to set a firm boundary to prevent any future harm.
  • “If you ever, under any circumstances, think about—if it even crosses your mind—to use my name to borrow money ever again, go to jail.” — Dave Ramsey (07:29)
• Rachel’s Support: Reassures Amanda that being firm and clear is not mean but necessary.
  • “And saying something firm is not mean.” — Rachel Cruze (08:49)

7. Broader Insights on Family and Financial Abuse

• Pattern Recognition:
  • Rachel acknowledges that Amanda is likely used to manipulative behavior from her mother, suggesting a history of dysfunction.
  • Dave and Rachel express strong condemnation of parents who exploit their children’s identities for personal gain.
  • “People 12 years old, they took out a credit card on a 12-year-old… Ruining—ruining.”
    — Dave Ramsey & Rachel Cruze (09:16–09:25)

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Memorable Quotes & Moments

• “I’m so sorry that you’re having to face this at 23 freaking years old and decide what you’re doing.” — Dave Ramsey (07:29)
• “It’s cost you $21,000 to deal with your family dysfunction. If you decide to pay it.” — Dave Ramsey (08:16)
• “Your parents do not have power of attorney over you because they bred you. That is not how the legal system works.” — Dave Ramsey (08:40)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• 00:06 — Caller introduces the dilemma of student loans taken out by her mother
• 00:36 — Details on living expenses and suspicion about loan proceeds
• 01:33 — Caller’s age and timeline of events
• 02:13 — Dave clarifies what constitutes fraud
• 03:22 — Rachel’s tip: ask for the promissory note
• 04:46 — How Amanda discovered the fraud (credit score alert)
• 05:30 — Dave outlines options: identity theft report or pay the debt
• 07:29 — Dave’s boundary-setting advice
• 09:16 — Hosts discuss the prevalence and severity of family financial abuse

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Conclusion

This episode provides a candid look at the distressing reality of familial financial betrayal. Dave and Rachel give Amanda not just legal and financial guidance, but also validation and emotional support, urging her to protect herself for the future, regardless of the path she chooses. Their advice is firm: recognize the severity of identity theft—even when it’s by a parent—and draw unmistakable boundaries to safeguard against further harm. This conversation serves as both a specific intervention for Amanda and a broader warning for anyone at risk of similar abuse.

Transcript

[Dave Ramsey]

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[Ramsey Caller]

So I'm calling for some guidance on what to do about some student loans, one of which my mom took out in my name without me knowing.

[Dave Ramsey]

Who got the use of the money?

[Ramsey Caller]

I don't know. That's the other thing I need help with.

[Rachel Cruze]

What's. Who's the option? Would it have been for you or for a sibling? Or for her? For a sibling, for.

[Dave Ramsey]

She buy a car where they go to Europe.

[Ramsey Caller]

I don't think she bought a car, went to Europe, and she didn't spend it on a sibling. But I'm trying to make sense of the numbers. So the first loan that I did know about was for 20,000, but I recall that my tuition was only about 17 for that year. And so there's an extra $3,000. And I kind of brushed it off thinking, oh, maybe she used that for, you know, my living expenses. Well, I learned right before Christmas that she took out a second $20,000 loan. And there's no way that my living expenses were $20,000 for that year because the only thing she was paying was my rent. Shabby place that was shared with 10 girls.

[Rachel Cruze]

How old is this?

[Dave Ramsey]

How old are you?

[Ramsey Caller]

23.

[Dave Ramsey]

So when was this all done? Two or three years ago?

[Ramsey Caller]

Yes, my. Yeah, my last year, which was two years ago.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay, so you're out now, out of school, and you've got a job, right?

[Ramsey Caller]

Yes.

[Dave Ramsey]

What do you make? What do you make?

[Ramsey Caller]

48. Plus a couple thousand extra for stipend.

[Dave Ramsey]

And then there's $40,000 worth. Two $20,000 loans that you did not sign for. She fraudulently signed your name.

[Ramsey Caller]

The first one I agreed to. So I wouldn't say that's fraudulent. I didn't want to.

[Dave Ramsey]

It is fraudulent. But you agreed to it. Okay.

[Rachel Cruze]

It's just the 3000. You don't know what happened to that 3K.

[Dave Ramsey]

You didn't sign it, and someone else signed your name. That's called fraud.

[Ramsey Caller]

Well, I think I remember signing something, and it was with my school.

[Dave Ramsey]

Then your mother did not take the loan out. You did.

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[Dave Ramsey]

Ramsey, your mother did not take the loan out. You did.

[Rachel Cruze]

Yeah, you took it. You just don't know what happened to the 3,000. Tell us about the second $20,000 loan.

[Ramsey Caller]

So, yes, I'm okay. I made peace with the first one. It was against my better judgment, but I've learned that that was my fault, and I've been attacking that, killing it. The second one is what has me upset and angry and confused. And so that total is 20. Just over 21,000 because some interest has occurred.

[Rachel Cruze]

Have you seen the promissory note? Because you can go back and see who signed it.

[Ramsey Caller]

No. So should I ask that company for it?

[Dave Ramsey]

Well, let's. Let's go back a minute. I want to go back. I want to go back to Christmas for a second. So why this conversation sound.

[Ramsey Caller]

We have not had a conversation about it.

[Dave Ramsey]

We're. How did you find out about it?

[Ramsey Caller]

Because my bank, like, has a credit alert, credit score alert, and it popped up that my credit had gone down, and I didn't even know I had a credit score because I have no other debt. And the first loan is just through my college, which is not a. Does not take federal money.

[Dave Ramsey]

Doesn't matter if it takes federal money. They still report it.

[Rachel Cruze]

Still on your credit report.

[Ramsey Caller]

That one's not showing up. The one that I knew about with my college, so.

[Dave Ramsey]

So it pops up, and you found it there, and you didn't say anything to your mother?

[Ramsey Caller]

No.

[Dave Ramsey]

Why?

[Ramsey Caller]

Because she. We're not on the best terms. I feel like she would just lie or cry about it. She kind of lied to my dad about it. When I asked him about it, she was like, oh, yeah, I wondered about that. I don't know why I've been paying it. Well, she hasn't paid a dollar on it, so if I confronted her.

[Dave Ramsey]

Is your dad and mom married?

[Ramsey Caller]

No. They've recently divorced, which is kind of what started this all off.

[Dave Ramsey]

I see. Okay. All right. Well, there's two options. All right? And neither one of them are pretty. I'm sorry. Okay. One is you get in touch with the servicing company. The servicing. The student loan, and you turn it over as identity theft. Okay. That someone stole my identity and opened a student loan in my name, and that someone happens to, sadly be my mother, and I did not sign this debt. You're very sure you did not sign that one, right?

[Ramsey Caller]

Yes.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay. That would entail taking out a police report and reporting her to law enforcement. For being a criminal. Because she is, by the way, a criminal. Stealing money, using my taxpayer dollars. I'm the one freaking paying this, okay? Pisses me off. Because your mother's scummy. She's a criminal. So you got to put her in that bucket, then file a police report. The second option is equally as ugly. Shut up and pay it. I don't like either one of them. Do you?

[Ramsey Caller]

No, not at all.

[Dave Ramsey]

I'm sorry. But this is what happens, you know, with this ridiculous student loan program that we have now. So if you want to dig into it, you can spend a lot of energy and calories and figure out who signed it. But someone signed it, and you're either going to see your little signature there and you forgot about it, or you're going to see the criminal signature there that looks suspicious, like your mother's handwriting. And then you get to still make this exact same decision. Either way, you get to make this decision before I reported her to the police. I'd be very, very sure that you didn't sign it, though. Yeah, but I don't know that they'll put her in jail. I doubt it. I wish they would put some people in jail for doing this kind of crap. Particularly people who steal their own children's identity for their own personal benefit. Some kind. And then cry about it. Yeah. I robbed a bank. I'm gonna cry about it. I'm so sorry. I don't want to go to jail. I robbed a bank. Oh, my God.

[Rachel Cruze]

I mean, it's true. It's true. Amanda, it sounds like you're kind of used to this type of behavior.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah. Like your mother's nuts.

[Rachel Cruze]

Like this is a pattern. It's not just one event that's taken place. And we're here to tell you that this is really bad.

[Dave Ramsey]

I'm so sorry. I'm sorry that you're having to face this at 23 freaking years old and decide what you're doing. I can tell you this, okay? If you want to dig into it, you decide to pay it, because I got a feeling that's what you're going to do. Not sure it's what I would do, but I've got a feeling that's what you're going to do. And I'm not judging you either way, because neither one of these are good options, I'm telling you that. But I would have a conversation with your mother in person and say if you ever, under any circumstances, think about if it even crosses your mind to use my name to borrow money ever again, Go to jail. Do not pass Go. Do not collect $200. I'm going to send your butt straight to jail. Now. You'll be a little bit nicer than that, but not much.

[Rachel Cruze]

I was gonna say. I don't know if you'd be.

[Dave Ramsey]

I'm. Set the table. Okay. To where this never happens again. Because it's cost you $21,000 to deal with your family dysfunction. If you decide to pay it. You don't have to pay it if you didn't sign it. You are not liable for something you didn't sign. Your parents do not have power of attorney over you because they bred you.

[Rachel Cruze]

Mm.

[Dave Ramsey]

That is not how the legal system works. Okay? And so unless you have signed a power of attorney, they cannot sign your name, period.

[Rachel Cruze]

And saying something firm is not mean.

[Advertisement Voice]

You know?

[Dave Ramsey]

I know, but I was. I was being pretty. I was being pretty sarcastic and crazy there, but.

[Rachel Cruze]

Yeah. I don't know.

[Dave Ramsey]

I think I'm gonna be very, very clear. Very clear and very clear. If you ever use my name again, go to jail. I'm not gonna screw around. You. You do. You stay away from me.

[Rachel Cruze]

Yeah. Yeah. You got to lay down the boundary.

[Dave Ramsey]

$21,000 is going to cost you. Yeah.

[Rachel Cruze]

I wish they would try it. Wow. That's different.

[Dave Ramsey]

The ones that get me to it, I mean, people 12 years old, they took out a credit card on a 12 year old.

[Rachel Cruze]

Yes. Happens all the time.

[Dave Ramsey]

$20,000 on a 12 year old.

[Rachel Cruze]

Ruining. Ruining.

[Dave Ramsey]

Haul your butt to jail for doing that. Just set it over there. Just sit over there in the jail. That's where you ought to be. Because you're stealing money and you're using your own child to do it. What a scumber. Create your free every dollar budget today. The simplest way to budget for your life.