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Dave Ramsey
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Caller
Had a question today, not about gift giving, but gift receiving. So long story short, we've been using your guys baby steps since about late 2022, so a little over a year. We're just finishing step two. We're on to our last $8,000. We should be done by about May of this year being all paid off. So we're excited. But the issue is. So I found out that has been saving some of. Some of her discretionary income on the side, some of the pocket changes, spending money that she's had over the years. And she bought me what I would consider a pretty expensive Christmas gift. What about $850?
Dave Ramsey
What?
Caller
It's something that I've wanted for years. I'm a nerd. What is it? Legos and Star Wars? It's the Lego Millennium Falcon, the giant one.
Co-host
How long did she save up her fun money to do this?
Caller
Only six or seven months.
Co-host
Okay.
Caller
And so the thing is, I'm still in the trenches. My mind, is it paying off our debt? How come hers is free and clear?
Dave Ramsey
How come hers. How come hers is not in the trenches?
Caller
I don't know. I thought it was.
Dave Ramsey
Yeah.
Co-host
Was the fun money. I just have a question. Was the fun money that something that you guys decided was going to be on the budget? And it is. And you have a line item too.
Caller
Yep.
Co-host
Okay. And you've been spending yours on what you consider fun?
Caller
For the most part. Usually mine goes towards day trips and vacations for us.
Co-host
Okay. And then she's so a little, little.
Caller
Like, you know, out in the local area, going to a nice restaurant every once in a while.
Co-host
Okay. And then she's. Instead of spending hers on what she would consider fun, whether it be for her or both of you, she's stacked it up for this gift.
Caller
Yes.
Co-host
And what you're thinking is, don't stack it up for the gift. If you're gonna do anything, put it on the debt.
Caller
And I mean, yeah, I mean, it's a tenth of our remaining debt. Why wouldn't we just, you know, pay off that much more of it?
Co-host
Well, because you guys said you had fun money.
Dave Ramsey
No, I disagree.
Co-host
Well, I'm not saying that. That's right. But I am saying that you guys created a budget. You both shook and agree on it. You spent your money on one way, and now you're. Now that you see her, she's been. She stacked up hers. You're like, oh, Wait a minute. I want. The truth is, Dave is right. You guys shouldn't have been doing fun money to begin with.
Dave Ramsey
If you're paying off this level, we're not going out to eat. We're not going on vacation. We're totally intense and totally focused, and I don't know how in the crud you come up with 850 bucks in a super gazelle intense budget. You should have been putting.
Co-host
You should neither.
Dave Ramsey
Every dollar out. And anytime you have money left at the end of the month, you throw it at the debt.
Co-host
That's right.
Dave Ramsey
You don't stack it up in the corner. This is not a squirrel fund. So, I mean, you do whatever you want to do, but that is not following the baby steps.
Co-host
Neither of you.
Dave Ramsey
When you're in baby step two, neither one of you are. When you're baby step two, you're throwing everything. You don't see the inside of a restaurant unless you're working there. We're not going on vacation. We're getting out of debt. And so you guys are. You've been. You've been focused, but you've not been intense. And so you do whatever y'all want to do in your plan. Our plan is all this money should have been going towards the debt. All of it. All along.
Co-host
You would have been done by now.
Dave Ramsey
Yeah, probably. Why Refi Refinances delinquent private student loans for struggling borrowers. Learn more at yrefy. Com Ramsay.
Podcast: The Ramsey Show Highlights
Host: Ramsey Network
Episode Title: My Wife Bought Me a $850 Lego Set Behind My Back
Release Date: January 19, 2025
In this episode of The Ramsey Show Highlights, a dedicated listener reaches out with a heartfelt dilemma that touches on the delicate balance between debt repayment and personal generosity within a marriage. The discussion delves into the principles of Dave Ramsey's Baby Steps financial plan, emphasizing the importance of unified efforts in achieving financial freedom.
At [00:10], the caller begins by sharing that he and his wife have been diligently following Dave Ramsey's Baby Steps since late 2022. They are nearing the completion of Step Two, with only $8,000 left to pay off by May. The excitement of nearing debt freedom is palpable. However, the caller reveals a surprising twist:
Caller (00:45): "I found out that she has been saving some of her discretionary income on the side, some of the pocket changes, spending money that she's had over the years. And she bought me what I would consider a pretty expensive Christmas gift. What about $850?"
The gift in question is the Lego Millennium Falcon, a coveted item for any Star Wars enthusiast, particularly appealing to someone who proudly identifies as a "nerd." The caller is both appreciative of the gesture and concerned about the financial implications.
The co-host probes further to understand the extent of the wife's savings:
Co-host (01:02): "How long did she save up her fun money to do this?"
Caller (01:02): "Only six or seven months."
This revelation leads to a critical examination of their budgeting approach:
Co-host (01:05): "Was the fun money that something that you guys decided was going to be on the budget? And it is. And you have a line item too."
Caller (01:31): "Yep."
The caller explains that both he and his wife have allocated "fun money" in their budget, which he primarily uses for day trips and vacations. In contrast, his wife has discreetly saved hers to afford the substantial Lego set.
Caller (01:54): "Yes. And what you're thinking is, don't stack it up for the gift. If you're gonna do anything, put it on the debt."
Dave Ramsey takes a firm stance on the issue, challenging the concept of "fun money" during aggressive debt repayment:
Dave Ramsey (02:09): "No, I disagree."
Co-host (02:09): "Well, because you guys said you had fun money."
Ramsey emphasizes that during Baby Step Two, the sole focus should be on eliminating debt without diversions:
Dave Ramsey (02:46): "You don't stack it up in the corner. This is not a squirrel fund. So, I mean, you do whatever you want to do, but that is not following the baby steps."
He underscores the importance of total financial commitment:
Dave Ramsey (03:20): "Every dollar out. And anytime you have money left at the end of the month, you throw it at the debt."
The co-host echoes Ramsey’s sentiment, reinforcing the necessity of unified financial discipline:
Co-host (02:55): "Neither of you."
Ramsey concludes by questioning the integrity of their budget adherence:
Dave Ramsey (03:20): "When you're baby step two, neither one of you are. ... You've been focused, but you've not been intense."
Unified Financial Strategy: Ramsey advocates for both partners to be fully committed to the debt repayment plan without diverting funds to personal desires, ensuring a streamlined approach to financial freedom.
Reevaluation of Budget Categories: The episode questions the effectiveness of allocating "fun money" during critical debt elimination phases, suggesting that any available funds should directly target debt reduction.
Communication and Transparency: The situation highlights the importance of open communication between spouses regarding financial decisions, especially when they deviate from the agreed-upon plan.
Long-Term Financial Health Over Short-Term Gratification: While the wife's gesture is commendable, Ramsey emphasizes prioritizing long-term financial stability over immediate, albeit generous, gifts.
In "My Wife Bought Me a $850 Lego Set Behind My Back," The Ramsey Show Highlights addresses the challenges couples may face when personal generosity intersects with strict financial plans. Dave Ramsey and his co-host provide candid advice, reinforcing the principles of unwavering commitment to debt elimination. The episode serves as a poignant reminder that achieving financial freedom requires not only discipline but also cohesive teamwork and transparent communication within a partnership.
This episode underscores the delicate balance between personal gestures and financial goals, offering valuable lessons for listeners navigating similar crossroads in their financial journeys.