Podcast Summary: "There's No Such Thing As An Ambitious Weed Smoker"

The Ramsey Show Highlights
Host: Dave Ramsey, with Chris Hogan
Air Date: September 21, 2025
Episode Length: ~8 minutes

Overview

This episode centers on a poignant call from a hardworking mother and wife who is the breadwinner in her family. She discusses her struggles with carrying the financial burden, raising two college-age twins, and coping with a husband who hasn’t worked in 19 years due to chronic back pain but has since recovered yet lacks motivation to return to work. The conversation dives deeply into issues of ambition, marital dynamics, financial partnership, and the impact of long-term weed use on motivation.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Caller’s Situation: Breadwinner Burnout

• Caller’s Background (00:02–03:00)

  • The caller supports her twin 19-year-old children, who both commute to college and live at home.
  • She feels guilt for not being able to save for their education, especially given her daughter’s aspiration to become a doctor.
  • The caller reveals she previously worked two full-time jobs to aggressively pay off $100,000 in debt after a 2011 layoff, demonstrating her extreme work ethic and financial discipline.

• Quote:

  "I have 19 year old twins who are going to a local community college on a presidential scholarship... I feel like I have failed them because I was never able to save for their college." (Caller, 00:24)

2. Husband’s Disability and Recovery

• Chronic Illness Timeline (01:39–03:00)

  • The husband injured his back 19 years ago, leading to several surgeries, opioid addiction, and years of pain.
  • After his last surgery in 2017, he became opiate-free, but continues to manage his pain with marijuana.
  • He relies on Social Security and a small pension and has not returned to work, leading to growing resentment in the marriage.

• Quote:

  "He is now opiate free. He does smoke weed... That's all he really does to manage the pain. And he just, he gets his Social Security and he's happy with that." (Caller, 01:47)

3. Ambition, Weed Use, and Financial Partnership

• Dave’s Direct Analysis (03:22–04:03)

  • Dave points out the connection between marijuana use and lack of motivation.

  • He asserts that “there’s no such thing as an ambitious weed smoker” and connects the caller’s husband’s passivity with his regular use of THC.

  • Quote:

    "You know what THC does to the ambition centers of the brain, don't you now?... It shuts them down. There's no such thing as an ambitious weed smoker. They're all mellow and perpetually hungry." (Dave Ramsey, 03:27–03:39)

• Resentment and Responsibility (04:03–05:01)

  • Chris Hogan recognizes the caller’s built-up resentment and pinpoints her carrying the mental and financial load.

  • The hosts discuss a recent large purchase made by the husband, highlighting financial decisions are joint, not individual.

  • Quote:

    "You get what you tolerate. Since 2017, you've tolerated this... You went along with it. You signed the papers. You can't blame that on him. You did it." (Dave Ramsey, 04:44–05:01)

4. The Real Problem: Marriage Misalignment

• Turning Point and Action Steps (05:01–07:01)

  • Dave reframes the issue, asserting it’s not just a “husband problem” but a deeper marriage problem caused by years of tolerating misalignment.

  • He stresses the need for marital counseling and direct confrontation now to avoid years of worsening resentment.

  • Quote:

    "You guys need to sit down with a good marriage counselor because you're quickly losing respect with the guy you're going to spend your twilight years with... What you have is a marriage problem. That's what you have. It's not a husband problem. It's a marriage problem. But you get what you tolerate." (Dave Ramsey, 05:46–06:25)

• Comparative Anecdote

  • Dave shares how quickly his own wife, Sharon, would address such imbalance, using humor to highlight how normalization of inaction can perpetuate marital issues.

5. Loss of Purpose & Effects of Long-term Marijuana Use

• Emotional and Purposeful Impact (07:01–07:51)

  • Chris Hogan notes the husband may have lost his sense of purpose and could be dealing with depression.

  • Dave and Chris agree that long-term weed use erodes drive, ambition, and engagement with life.

  • Quotes:

    "It sounds like he might have lost some purpose. He might be depressed, and so he got to find his mojo." (Chris Hogan, 07:01)
    "That was the sound of ambition leaving the room. I heard it." (Dave Ramsey, 07:12)
    "You're not going to be like, 'I'm gonna go run a marathon now. Let's go.'... I'm gonna tackle the world and open a business, and I'm gonna go be Somebody said, no weed hit ever." (Chris Hogan and Dave Ramsey, 07:44–07:51)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• "There's no such thing as an ambitious weed smoker. They're all mellow and perpetually hungry."
  — Dave Ramsey, 03:39

• "You get what you tolerate... You went with him. You signed the papers. You can't blame that on him. You did it."
  — Dave Ramsey, 04:44–05:01

• "What you have is a marriage problem. That's what you have. It's not a husband problem. It's a marriage problem. But you get what you tolerate."
  — Dave Ramsey, 05:57–06:25

• "That was the sound of ambition leaving the room."
  — Dave Ramsey, 07:12

Timestamps for Key Segments

• 00:02–01:39: Caller details her family’s history, financial struggles, and work ethic.
• 01:39–02:53: Discussion about husband’s injury, surgeries, addiction, and transition to marijuana use.
• 03:22–04:03: Impact of marijuana on ambition and marital dynamics.
• 04:03–05:01: Building resentment, joint financial decisions, and personal responsibility.
• 05:01–06:25: Core problem identified as a marriage misalignment; suggestion of counseling.
• 07:01–07:51: Conversation on loss of purpose, depression, and lasting effects of marijuana use.

Summary

The episode offers a candid look at how unaddressed marital imbalance, chronic health struggles, and substance use can erode both ambition and partnership. Dave and Chris challenge the caller to confront long-standing tolerances and seek professional help, emphasizing the mutual nature of marital decisions and the real effects of chronic weed use on drive and engagement. Their direct, sometimes humorous southern wisdom provides both tough love and practical next steps for anyone in a similar rut.