The Ramsey Show Highlights
Episode Title: What's Wrong With Your Parents?
Date: September 6, 2025
Podcast Host: Dave Ramsey
Guests/Co-Hosts: George Kamel
Caller: John
Episode Overview
In this episode, Dave Ramsey and George Kamel take a call from John, a 19-year-old college sophomore, who describes a troubling pattern of his parents borrowing—and not repaying—his and his siblings’ earnings. The conversation delves into the dynamics of financial abuse within families, the emotional and ethical implications, and the importance of setting boundaries. The hosts offer both practical and emotional guidance, not shying away from calling out the dysfunctional nature of John's family’s behavior.
Key Discussion Points and Insights
1. Caller’s Story: Parental Financial Abuse
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John’s Experience:
- In high school, John’s parents repeatedly took about $3,000 of his earnings, promising to pay him back but never doing so.
- His siblings, currently aged 16–17, are now experiencing the same treatment.
- John has since moved out for college and secured his finances separately.
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[00:25] John:
“I had. Well, I was making about five to $8,000 a year just working part time and then full time during the summers.”
“About $3,000 total after. Before I could get my own bank account…”
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Dave’s Immediate Reaction:
- Unapologetically calls this “financial abuse” and expresses bewilderment at the parents’ behavior.
- Emphasizes that adults should never take money from their children, regardless of circumstances.
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[01:05] Dave Ramsey:
“Financial abuse?... Yeah. Okay. What’s wrong with your parents? That’s so weird.”
2. The Justification and Reality
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John explains that his parents have financial troubles, including his mother’s injury and job loss, but also reveals the family’s income is over $100k per year.
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The hosts challenge the justification that it’s about survival and food, given the actual income.
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[03:33] Dave Ramsey:
“I mean, what’s. What. What is good money? Because food on the table is not good money. If you have to take it from a teenager... Yeah, they don’t have good money.”
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[03:47] John:
“Well, I think they make definitely over 100 grand. That was a couple of years ago. I heard it.”
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[03:52] Dave Ramsey:
“So these people are just whacked. They’re just whacked. Okay.”
3. The Toll on Siblings and Family Dynamics
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John worries about his siblings’ ability to prepare for their futures while their parents drain their savings.
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George and Dave discuss the difficulty of protecting money when still living under the parents’ roof and contemplate the consequences of confronting the parents.
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Emphasis on the “elephant in the room”—the family avoids addressing the obvious breach of trust.
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[04:04] George:
“Are there equally wacky stories that you’re not bringing up and we don’t have time to cover?”
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[05:34] Dave Ramsey:
“Let me help you with this. There’s a big old elephant with his butt sitting in the middle of your living room. Already y’all are walking around it. Yeah. Acting like it’s not there.”
4. What Can Be Done?
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Dave suggests two options:
- Make peace and move on
- Interfere to protect siblings, possibly by helping them open their own bank accounts, even at the cost of family conflict
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[05:18] Dave Ramsey:
“That’s what I say. I just say, you know, you’re freaking thief.”
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George raises the point of whether protecting the siblings could lead to their being thrown out of the house.
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[06:20] George:
“…I legitimately think that if I confronted them. I’m talking about your siblings, and they were still doing it, I think I would have left. I would have gone to family. I would have gone somewhere, because I think that’s such a breach of trust.”
5. Ethical and Long-Term Considerations
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Dave and George call out the parents’ lack of integrity, calling their actions “scummy” and discussing the ethics of such behavior.
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They underline that John won't be able to fix his parents, but denial isn't healthy either.
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[06:43] Dave Ramsey:
“Yeah. It’s really the lack of integrity. Here on the. The ethics of this are just scummy.”
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Dave jokes about wanting to “throw a grenade” in the middle of the situation, recognizing the need for intervention but acknowledging the potential for family fallout.
6. Seeking Support and Setting Boundaries
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Dave recommends that John seek local, in-person pastoral or counseling support, instead of acting alone, and encourages setting boundaries for future interactions with his parents.
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Suggests the book “Boundaries” by Dr. Henry Cloud.
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[07:14] Dave Ramsey:
“John, I’ll tell you what I’d like for you to do. I’d like for you to take advice from someone other than us because we’re just stirring up trouble here and I don’t think that’s wise either. So if I were you, I would get with a local pastor there and if you’re not plugged into a good church, get plugged into a good church and get some good godly counsel…”
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Calls out the parents’ excuses as “narcissistic” and “gaslighting”:
“…That’s a narcissistic bullcrap line. Whether they’re a narcissist, I don’t know. But it’s a narcissistic line. It’s gaslighting.”
Memorable Quotes & Moments
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Dave Ramsey [01:32]:
“I mean grown ups don’t take kids money. That’s just not okay for any reason to borrow or otherwise. That’s just wrong.”
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Dave Ramsey [04:38]:
“…they don’t give a rip. They justify it, which is absolutely ludicrous. Typically what some kind of weirdo like this will do…”
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Dave Ramsey [05:34]:
“There’s a big old elephant with his butt sitting in the middle of your living room. Already y’ all are walking around it. Yeah. Acting like it’s not there.”
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George Kamel [06:20]:
“I would have gone to family. I would have gone somewhere, because I think that’s such a breach of trust. It’s just so nuts.”
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Dave Ramsey [07:14]:
“…if this were another kind of abuse, it would be against the law and social services would come in. But this is just financial abuse. They’re just stealing the money and they don’t need it to eat. That’s absolute hogwash. If they make 100,000 and they’re not choosing food over choosing stealing their teenagers money, they’re not choosing. That’s just bull crap. That’s a narcissistic bullcrap line… It’s gaslighting. So yeah, wow.”
Important Timestamps
- 00:06–01:05: John introduces the problem.
- 01:12–01:32: John explains family background and justifications.
- 02:09–02:36: George discusses the challenge of protecting money at home.
- 03:10–03:52: Discussion about parents’ income and their excuses.
- 04:04–04:38: Exploration of broader family dysfunction.
- 05:17–05:34: Dave and George contemplate possible actions to protect siblings.
- 06:20–06:43: George’s personal hypothetical and Dave's ethical assessment.
- 07:14–end: Dave’s advice: seek local counsel and set boundaries.
Final Thoughts
This episode tackles a serious and often taboo topic: financial abuse within families. The hosts don’t mince words about the integrity issues at play, providing both affirmation for John’s feelings and practical advice for navigating the situation. Their blend of empathy, candor, and the suggestion of seeking outside support reflects the complexity of dealing with family financial dysfunction. The strong stance on boundaries and personal empowerment offers support not just to John, but to any listener facing similar challenges.
