I Have Over $300k Cash Sitting In My House (I'm Scared Of The Stock Market)

Summary

The Ramsey Show – Episode Summary

Episode Title: "I Have Over $300k Cash Sitting In My House (I'm Scared Of The Stock Market)"
Air Date: February 11, 2026
Hosts: Ken Coleman & Jade Warshaw (with Dave Ramsey)
Podcast: Ramsey Network

---

Episode Overview

In this episode of The Ramsey Show, Ken Coleman and Jade Warshaw, alongside contributions from Dave Ramsey, tackle a range of personal finance questions from live callers. The show features standout conversations about boundaries with financially irresponsible family members, extreme savers hesitant about investing, dealing with overwhelming debt, and navigating finances in relationships and career shifts. The main theme centers around overcoming financial fear and uncertainty—whether it’s the caller with $300,000 in cash at home afraid of the stock market, or others learning to set healthy boundaries, rebuild after hardship, or invest intentionally for the future. The Ramsey team delivers actionable advice with their usual warm, empathetic, and direct approach.

---

Key Topics & Timestamps

1. Supporting a Parent with Bad Money Habits (Call from Steve in Atlanta) – 00:44–09:01
2. Life & Disability Insurance Segment – 09:01–10:52
3. $300k in Cash at Home, Fear of Investing (Stewie in Chicago) – 10:52–20:42
4. Debt After Medical Crisis (Damian in Lincoln) – 23:13–32:53
5. Finances in a Relationship (Tyler in Wilmington, DE) – 32:53–43:56
6. Post-Debt, Choosing Big Expenses (Alexandra in Coeur d'Alene, ID) – 54:02–61:01
7. Mortgage Recasting vs. Paying Principal (Kevin in Columbia, SC) – 61:02–64:52
8. When Spending is the New Addiction (Kate in Newark, NJ) – 66:56–74:15
9. Career Crossroads: Farming vs. Firefighting (Edwin in Minneapolis) – 75:23–84:24
10. Debt Consolidation & Real Estate (Toby in Phoenix, AZ) – 85:06–93:38
11. Helping an Adult Child with Student Loans (Melissa in Chicago) – 100:52–104:24
12. Combining Finances in Second Marriages (Lisa in Las Vegas) – 105:32–115:19
13. Keep the Dream Car or Pay Off Mortgage Faster? (Zach in Columbus, OH) – 116:11–125:31

---

Detailed Breakdown & Notable Moments

1. Supporting a Parent with Bad Money Habits

[00:44–09:01]

• Steve calls about his mother, a chronic overspender. He’s bailed her out many times, paying off escalating sums of credit card debt over the years ($3k, $5k, $7k, $21k, and now $33k).
• Steve stopped paying her credit cards, paid off her mortgage instead, but struggles with guilt.
• Jade and Ken challenge Steve to face his own role in enabling her.
• Memorable Moment:
  • “Your guilt about not solving her problem is stronger than your logic for actually doing the right thing.” – Jade Warshaw ([03:30])
• Advice: Stop bailing her out financially; only help if she gives him full financial control (power of attorney); recognize his limits to change her behavior.

---

2. $300k in Cash at Home, Fear of Investing

[10:52–20:42]

• Stewie, self-employed in agriculture, has accumulated $300,000 in cash at home, plus $400,000 in a savings account. No investments; fears the stock market due to family stories from the Depression.
• Jade calculates if he invested $300k plus $500/month at age 50, he’d have ~$1.89 million by 67 (assuming 10% return).
  • Quote:
    • "When it's at home, there's zero compounding interest. As a matter of fact, it's almost negative. It's depleting the value of your money because [of] inflation." – Jade Warshaw ([13:53])
• Both urge Stewie to connect with a SmartVestor Pro, move cash to investments, and keep only 3–6 months of expenses liquid.
• Jade encourages him to challenge fear-based stories with facts about long-term stock market growth.
• Entertaining discussion on physically moving that much cash safely to a bank.

---

3. Debt After Medical Crisis

[23:13–32:53]

• Damian injured in an ATV accident, got $210,000 in medical debt, plus credit card, repo, and student loan debt.
• Jade counsels against bankruptcy; recommends aggressive debt settlement using lump sum offers (30–50% of balance) in cash and persistence with creditors.
• Notable Advice:
  • Get everything in writing when settling. Focus on smallest debts first for momentum.
  • “Settle these things one at a time. Now, the big question is, are you learning your lesson?” – Ken Coleman ([29:31])
• Emphasizes mental fortitude during endless collections calls.

---

4. Finances in a Relationship

[32:53–43:56]

• Tyler, 27, is dating a woman with debt and lower income. He pays for dates, vacations—and feels leaned on.
• Jade and Ken unpack the difference between generosity and becoming an ATM.
• Key Exchange:
  • ”She knows that I know she’s not in a great financial situation.” – Tyler ([35:08])
  • Jade: “Now’s the time to try to go: Who are you for real?”
• Advice: Have honest conversations about expectations and philosophies on money before considering a deeper commitment. If something feels off, address it now.

---

5. Post-Debt, Choosing Big Expenses

[54:02–61:01]

• Alexandra and husband, debt-free and saving, disagree about attending two destination weddings.
• Jade introduces her "Financially Responsible Adult Checklist" (budgeting, debt-free, proper insurance, adequate retirement/down payment savings, generosity).
• Since they tick all five boxes, both hosts greenlight the weddings—no guilt.
• “Everything else is you just go to cash…This is a no brainer. Tell hubs that you have two yeses.” – Ken Coleman ([58:37])

---

6. Mortgage Recasting vs. Paying Principal

[61:02–64:52]

• Kevin asks whether to use $200k in proceeds to “recast” his mortgage or pay down principal.
• Jade argues against recasting if current payment is manageable; recommends putting lump sum toward principal for the fastest payoff and wealth building.

---

7. When Spending is the New Addiction

[66:56–74:15]

• Kate shares her husband racks up debt ($12k) via credit cards, Klarna/Sezzle, after kicking alcoholism, and is now hands-off on the family money.
• Both hosts urge taking away financial access (with counseling support) until he can demonstrate control—protect the family first.
• “Since his addiction seems to be functioning in our money...for a season I should be the one to handle the finances.” – Jade Warshaw ([72:11])

---

8. Career Crossroads: Farming vs. Firefighting

[75:23–84:24]

• Edwin, 26, runs the family dairy farm, but longs to be a firefighter out West.
• Ken and Jade help him see the difference between real duty to family and self-imposed guilt.
• Notable Exchange:
  • “You’ve concocted some drama that may not be true. Is that possible?” – Ken ([80:11])
  • “You can speculate [about family’s reaction], but you can’t let someone else's reaction...stop you.” – Jade ([81:48])
• They encourage Edwin to pursue his life, not his father’s expectations.

---

9. Debt Consolidation & Real Estate

[85:06–93:38]

• Toby, 62, owns three paid-for houses but has $79k in debt. Tempted by debt consolidation.
• Jade and Ken strongly discourage consolidation. Recommend selling a property to clear debt and create an income plan for retirement.
• They stress that housing tenants below market rate is admirable, but self-care comes first.

---

10. Helping an Adult Child with Student Loans

[100:52–104:24]

• Melissa, single mom, wants to motivate her daughter (teacher, 27, loans in forbearance) to pay off student debt.
• Jade suggests a parent “match” program: daughter pays, Melissa matches 50%; but make all payments directly to the loan, not as cash handouts.
• “My only caveat: You must make the payment directly to the debt. We're not going to just give her the money.” – Jade Warshaw ([103:14])

---

11. Combining Finances in Second Marriages

[105:32–115:19]

• Lisa, re-married four years, can’t get husband to combine finances. He lost his job, kept gambling winnings ($50k) separate.
• Both hosts warn about trust and transparency—combine finances fully, and see a marriage counselor to work through deeper issues.
• Jade notes second marriages often struggle with trust—"honor the same vows and principles…[marriage] is about becoming one flesh." ([114:08])

---

12. Keep the Dream Car or Pay Off Mortgage Faster?

[116:11–125:31]

• Zach saved, paid off six figures in debt, now has only a $144k mortgage left, could pay off 21% by selling his rare Dodge Challenger.
• Torn between security and keeping his “barn find” for his kids, he feels guilty owning something nice.
• Ken and Jade both encourage: keep the car, keep the joy.
• “Are you financially responsible? Yes or no?” – Ken (121:07)
  • “You spent way more time explaining the car than the problem, which means you love the car...then don’t.” – Jade (118:43)
• They remind him not to deny himself joy out of shame or endlessly “moving the goalposts.”

---

Notable Quotes

• On Financial Enablement:

  • “Your guilt about not solving her problem is stronger than your logic for actually doing the right thing.” – Jade Warshaw ([03:30])

• On Cash Hoarding vs Investing:

  • “When it's at home, there's zero compounding interest...as a matter of fact, it's almost negative.” – Jade Warshaw ([13:53])

• On Relationship Boundaries:

  • “Now's the time to try to go, 'Who are you for real?’” – Jade Warshaw ([39:56])

• On Career Choices:

  • “You can't let someone else's reaction...stop you.” – Jade Warshaw ([81:48])

• On Worthiness and Success:

  • “You don’t think you deserve it...stop making excuses...about yourself.” – Ken Coleman to Zach ([121:07])

---

Final Thoughts

This episode delivers practical, tough love—urging listeners to face their financial fears, set boundaries, and harness facts (not emotions or inherited stories) to make smart money moves. The hosts’ mix of empathy, accountability, and humor (especially regarding $300k in cash at home!) make for an engaging, educational listen for anyone wanting to win with money, break unhealthy cycles, or simply feel less alone in the struggle for financial peace.

---

Transcript

[Dave Ramsey]

Brought to you by the EveryDollar app. Start budgeting for free today.

[Ken Coleman]

Normal is broke and common sense is weird. So we're here to help you transform your life. From the Ramsey Network in the Fairwinds Credit Union studio, this is the Ramsey show alongside Jade Warshaw. I'm Ken Coleman. Excited to have you with us. The phone number to jump in for your question today is 888-5225-888882-55225. Let's start it off with Steve, who joins us in Atlanta, Georgia. Steve, how can we help today?

[Caller]

Hey, Dave, thanks for taking my call.

[Jade Warshaw]

Sure.

[Caller]

So I'm trying to get some advice from you. I've got kind of a long term problem here with my mother and I think I should give a little Backstory here. About 15 years ago or so, her house was paid for and we had her car paid off. I knew she's always been a spender. I've been supplementing her income the last 10 years. And you know, I knew she was spending on credit cards. So first I gave her $3,000 to pay them off. Then I gave her the next year 5,000 and then it went to seven. And then in 2024, she had racked up 21,000 in credit card debt. And I had a heart to heart with her and I paid them off, gave her 21,000. And.

[Jade Warshaw]

Let me guess, it's right there.

[Caller]

Yeah. Told her I was done. I was not doing this anymore. And it's just kind of continued.

[Ken Coleman]

Where is it today?

[Caller]

Yes, she's at 33.

[Jade Warshaw]

So she went above and beyond. She outdid herself.

[Caller]

Yes. So last year I think I should, if I can continue a little. I'm just trying to figure out how I can help my mother. I want her to be okay, but I don't want. I paid her mortgage off and I didn't pay her credit cards off. I felt like at least I have some control and this is an asset that's appreciating.

[Ken Coleman]

What's your, what's your question, Steve? I know you want to keep going on, but we're pretty clear what's going on here on our end. So what's your question for us?

[Caller]

So my question is, you know what to do. You know, I don't want to do what you said.

[Jade Warshaw]

Don't pan.

[Ken Coleman]

Steve, were you just, were you just playing poker with her and trying to bluff her when you told her you weren't going to do it again?

[Caller]

Well, you know, I guess. How do I.

[Ken Coleman]

No, no, no, no. Steve, Steve, Steve, that was a question. That was a real question. Yes or no, Were you bluffing, or did you mean it that you were never going to pay off credit cards again?

[Caller]

I meant it.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay, then. Now you have to. You have to prove that you meant it. There's something that you're. There's something in you that feels like you're bad or feels guilt for not solving her problem. And your guilt about not solving her problem is stronger than your logic for actually doing the right thing.

[Caller]

Mm. Well, you know, I understand that. And so I stood. You know, I took my guns. She begged me to pay him off again. I didn't do it. Like I said, I paid the mortgage off. In fact, she actually got mad at me for doing that, as crazy as that sounds.

[Jade Warshaw]

It does sound crazy. But it sounds crazy for both of you guys. Here's what I want you to not do. If Ken and I give you a response going forward, I want you to not answer with the past. I want you to answer with something also that will be going forward. Is that fair enough?

[Caller]

Okay.

[Jade Warshaw]

Because the milk is spilled. Right? Here we are. There was years of enablement, and now we're at a precipice of a new way of doing life for both you and your mother. Right?

[Caller]

Correct.

[Jade Warshaw]

Hopefully. And so Ken and I are gonna help you get to that point and go forward from here. And leave the past in the past.

[Caller]

Yeah. So I guess my question to this is bankruptcy. She signed up for a debt consolidation company, and I don't want her to get taken advantage of. So that's the gist of my.

[Jade Warshaw]

I don't think you have to worry about her being taken advantage of. I think she's the take advantage of. Right. I don't think you have to worry about that.

[Ken Coleman]

Well, Steve, I. Listen, I have a lot of sympathy for you. I really do. But you called us, and you're asking us questions, and the question that you're not actually asking is what is okay for me to do and what is not okay for me to do? You're not asking it that way. And you're just circling the drain emotionally with her. And so you're asking, like, what about bankruptcy and all these things? Here's the deal. Your mother would be considered by the state, wherever she lives. Right. As capable of managing her own money. Yes or no?

[Caller]

Yes.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay. And even then, you're struggling. You're still making excuses for your mom. Your mom is a grown woman who has got all kinds of pain. And there's a backstory that leads to all of this behavior. But none of it matters. That's why I'm not going to list it out. What matters is you and Jade nailed it. You're in a really tough emotional spot, and I think what you're supposed to do here is acknowledge what kind of a tough emotional spot you're in. I would share it one last time with Mom. Hey. I'm now out financially, but I will tell you, the residue is I'm emotionally worried for you, and I feel like I'm not being a good son. But here's the problem, Mom. If I bail you out, you're not going to stop and it's going to hurt our relationship. So I can no longer worry about you. So I'm going to lay it out. Mom, you can't keep doing this. Here are your options right now. You're going to have to manage your own money, and you're going to have to wash your hands of this.

[Caller]

I.

[Ken Coleman]

Or else it's going to drive you absolutely emotionally insane, and then you're going to end up truly resenting your mother. This is a sad part, is that you can't do anything.

[Jade Warshaw]

Are you the only child, Steve? Is it just you?

[Caller]

Well, I grew up. I grew up. Yeah. So technically, I am. And we could go down some deeper rabbit holes, but I grew up with two stepbrothers and a stepsister, and they're.

[Jade Warshaw]

Not in the equation today. Are they in the equation today or they're not? Okay. And how old is your mom?

[Caller]

She's getting ready to turn 80.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay. Yeah.

[Caller]

She has some physical problems.

[Jade Warshaw]

I agree with ken. She's. She's 80, but she's. She's still here. She's. Her mind. Sounds like her mind works plenty well. Right? It's not. She's not slipped. Is she slipping.

[Caller]

Without going down the rabbit hole? She's had some depression issues, for certain.

[Jade Warshaw]

Depression. Okay, But I'm talking about. Is she with it? You know, no dementia, nothing like that. Right.

[Ken Coleman]

Aside from her giving you the power of attorney and basically her custodian, for lack of a better word. I know that's not the right word, so take it easy on me in the comments. But aside from her agreeing for you to manage her money, that's all you can do. So maybe you talk mom into doing that with her being with health problems, then you can manage her money. But aside from her giving you that, she'll die with this. Debt is the sad part, but that's not your problem. And I'm really sad that you're in this situation. I Think your one move is to go, mom, will you let me be in charge of all your money? Give me total control and I'll take care of you. That's the only shot you got.

[Jade Warshaw]

Dave.

[Ken Coleman]

We got a lot of calls on this show where life happens. One day, someone's healthy, they're working, providing for their family, and then a curveball hits.

[Dave Ramsey]

You know, we hear it all the time. A car accident, a cancer diagnosis, a heart attack, and suddenly everything changes.

[Ken Coleman]

Yeah, and that's why you've always said that having term life insurance from Zander is. Is essential because it protects your family if the worst happens.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah, that's right. You need 10 to 12 times your income in coverage. No gimmicks, no whole life junk, just straightforward term life protection. But there's another piece that people often overlook, and that's long term disability insurance.

[Ken Coleman]

Yeah, it's important to understand the difference between them. Life insurance steps in when you die. Disability insurance steps in while you're alive, but can't work, so it replaces a large part of your income so the bills still get paid while you get back on your feet.

[Dave Ramsey]

Now, if your employer gives you free disability insurance, great, take it. If it's discounted there at a better price, take it. But if not, Zander can help you find the right plan, whether you're single or married. It's not optional. If you're going to be out of work for a while, then you need to make sure the money's still showing up.

[Ken Coleman]

And that's why Zander is our go to. They make it super simple to get the right coverage at the best price. No pressure, no upselling.

[Dave Ramsey]

I've trusted Jeff, Zander and Zander insurance for over 25 years, and so has my family.

[Ken Coleman]

So don't wait. It's fast, it's easy, and it could make all the difference. Go to zander.com or call 800-356-4282.

[Dave Ramsey]

Protect yourself, protect your income, protect your family.

[Ken Coleman]

All right, let's go to Stewie in Chicago. I hope I said that right. Stewie, how can we help?

[Caller]

So I've got probably the opposite problem of the last caller. I am kind of a saver, okay? And maybe over the last 10 years, I've been collecting cash. Collecting cash. I always throw it in a drawer, and I never really use it. And now I realize, just the other day I realized I've got about $300,000 in my house. Oh, wow.

[Ken Coleman]

Wow.

[Caller]

And I'm not. I'm unsure of what to do with it and how Did, Is it, do I take it to the bank? Is it.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay, Is that your only, is that your only money, Stewie, is the 300,000 or have you ever used a bank?

[Caller]

No, I have a bank. I have a bank. It started, I don't know, it started as kind of a game 10 years ago. I save a hundred dollar bills and I just save. I don't know.

[Ken Coleman]

Yeah, but that's a lot.

[Caller]

Some money in a bank. But I just, I got more than. It's too much at the house, it seems like.

[Ken Coleman]

Yeah, it's, it's a, it's a much. What do you, what do you have? Do you have a traditional savings account?

[Caller]

I have, I have got a checking account and I've got a high yield savings account for some other money that I've got.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay, do you have any investment accounts? Anything that's like a 401k or an IRA, anything like that?

[Caller]

I never have.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay. Okay. How old are you, Stewie?

[Caller]

50.

[Ken Coleman]

You have no 401k, no retirement account of any kind of never have. Who do you work for? Well, you don't need to tell us that because I want to keep you as private as possible. But what kind of work do you do?

[Caller]

I'm self employed. I work in agriculture. And our business does. Our business takes in a lot of cash. And I just, at one point I decided, you know what? I like cash. I'm going to keep it around and out of hand.

[Ken Coleman]

Well, listen, so Jade is pulling up her handy dandy investment calculator. This is off of Ramsey Solutions website, ramseysolutions.com you need to pay close attention. Mentioned Stewie with the numbers and then she'll tell you what to do.

[Jade Warshaw]

So Stewie, with you just saving these hundred dollar bills, what would you say in a month, how much do you think you put away into savings under your mattress or wherever it is in your house?

[Caller]

I have no, it's slowed down quite a bit. My family's a lot larger now. The kids are bigger, we're spending more.

[Jade Warshaw]

Sure. But I mean, is it 500 bucks? Is it, you know, give me a ballpark.

[Caller]

Yeah, 500 to 1,000, probably 500.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay, I'll say 500. So here's what I, here's what I want to show you. First off, if you take that money and you invest it, which you should be doing, because the truth is the time is going to come when you don't work. Right. You're 50. I'm sure there's going to be a time where you don't want to have to go into work. Correct.

[Caller]

Correct.

[Jade Warshaw]

And you need to have a nest egg of money to draw off of. And there's a limited amount of time for you to build that nest egg. Fair enough.

[Caller]

True.

[Jade Warshaw]

Therefore, we need to harness the power of compounding interest. And when it's at home, there's zero compounding interest. As a matter of fact, it's almost negative. It's depleting the value of your money because inflation. Right. There's no hedge against inflation, and you understand that. So if we can, you know, next step is. Yeah. You popping in a high yield savings and maybe get 3.5% or maybe 4%, that's okay. But if you were to invest it in really just kind of your basic index fund, you know, good growth stock, mutual fund growth and income, you could really have an average annualized rate of return of around 10%. Like, you could pretty much bet on that. Okay, so if we did that, if we just popped that 300,000 into an index fund, I mean, you don't even have to get sophisticated here. That money. And you just said, hey, instead of putting the $500 that I sock away under the mattress, I'm gonna just add that to that pile every month. Do you know that just in 17 years, by the time you're 67, you're gonna have. It would be almost $2 million. It'd be 1.89 million.

[Caller]

I mean, it seems hard to believe, but I believe you.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah. And it is. And you hear the bigger part is you need that money because you said your family has continued to grow. There will come a day, whether you want it or not, that you can't work. So if I were in your shoes, doing. I know Ken would do the same. We would be skipping down to the bank. You know, we would be skipping over to invest that money right away because you said, how much do you have in the high yield savings?

[Caller]

Probably 400.

[Jade Warshaw]

Oh, man. Oh, man, You're a rich man. Stewie.

[Ken Coleman]

Hold on. I just want to make sure. 400,000.

[Caller]

I do.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay, so that's amazing. But listen, you've got to get with a smartvestor pro.

[Jade Warshaw]

Got to.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay, so we're going to have Christian direct you to the spot on our website. You need to interview a minimum of three SmartVestor Pros. They're independent of us, they're licensed, the whole nine yards. But they'll advise you the way we've advised you, and you are sitting on $700,000 in cash. So what our advice would be is that you have three to six months of your expenses in that savings account. High yield. Okay, so let's just say, for sake of discussion, that's 50,000.

[Jade Warshaw]

I'd even let him keep 100. Clearly, Stewie is the type that likes.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay, so let's say he keeps 100 in there. So now we've got $600,000 that you need to get invested soon in really good. The mutual funds that she's talking about and let that money go to work for you. And no longer are we putting money in the drawer the way you Pay yourself, the SmartVestor Pro that you select and go with. And they're gonna explain everything to where you understand it, and your eyes are gonna bug out of your head.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah.

[Ken Coleman]

And now you start doing what Jay told you to do. And again, you're gonna be a very, very wealthy person. But you need to get on it, because you've lost who knows how many millions of dollars by not having done this earlier. And at 50, it's time for you to step up and do this. There's nothing to be scared of. And they'll explain it well, but that's your next step.

[Jade Warshaw]

What's your aversion to it, Stewie? What is. What's caused you to kind of shy away from that?

[Caller]

I don't know if I have an answer. It started out as a game. I thought, I like saving money, and so I. We started it, and then you won the game. You know what I feel? I felt maybe sometimes I'm fearful of this. I am fearful of the stock market.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay, that's what I was getting to tell us about that. Why are you fearful of the stock market? Because that. That originated somewhere. And if we can just put our finger on that, we can. We can change that and shift that in your mind for you.

[Caller]

I'm not sure.

I mean, I know that my grandpa told me stories of hardship during the Depression. I don't know if that's enough to.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yes, those stories.

[Caller]

I'm scared of the stock market, Stewie.

[Jade Warshaw]

Spend some time thinking about that tonight. Because those stories, all of those things. Grandma, Grandpa told me this. I saw an image of this. I heard this report on tv. I read this in the news. All of that stuff starts to build up, and it starts to inform our view on a particular subject. And the thing is, that's okay. That's normal. But we do have to come to a point where we challenge it and we say, okay, this is the story I'm telling myself. Is it actually true? Is it true? Or Is this just what I've been around? And therefore the people that I was around believed this, and therefore it became my belief. But if I actually hold it up next to facts, I find out that that's actually not the truth. And so I love that you called in today because Ken and I are giving. We are giving you the facts. The truth is the annualized rate of return of the stock market since inception has been hovered around anywhere between 9 to 12%. Right. Depending on a given year. And so it's always going to, it's always ended up, up. And yes, there's been downturns, but usually it recovers very quickly within the next year or two after it's, it's fully recovered and then some. And so the point of the stock market is it's a long term, it's a long term ride. Right. It's not something you hop in and hop out of. But in your case, Stewie, oh my goodness, you pop in 600,000 and maybe you leave the other a hundred thousand liquid. And I mean, you're going to be a very rich man when, when it comes time to retire. So well done.

[Ken Coleman]

And I would be very careful about transported the 300,000 in cash to the bank.

[Jade Warshaw]

What do you do? You put it in a duffel bag.

[Ken Coleman]

Even that looks pretty obvious. If some dude rolls into your local bank and a duffel bag, you're like, there's cash in that bag.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah, be careful, Stewie.

[Ken Coleman]

They're gonna, I don't know how many trips you got in there. Maybe you're wearing some old school parachute pants.

[Jade Warshaw]

Oh, man. And it, oh, God, I think about.

[Ken Coleman]

Some security on that. It's a lot of dough you got.

[Caller]

Can you walk? Can you just walk in with that kind of money?

[Ken Coleman]

And I don't know, here's what I.

[Jade Warshaw]

Would ask you questions.

[Ken Coleman]

I would go talk to my local bank in the branch and say, here's what I've done. Help me do this the most secure way. They've done this before. So.

[Caller]

Okay.

[Ken Coleman]

Yeah.

[Jade Warshaw]

Otherwise you're gonna need some very, very muscle bound people to walk with you.

[Ken Coleman]

I always put myself in his shoes. If I tried to take that, I would break. My car would break down. Something crazy random would happen to me.

[Jade Warshaw]

Oh, man, you know what I mean? And you'd be on the side of the road just with this stack of cash.

[Ken Coleman]

Yeah, I think I'd go hire a local Brinks guy and just be like, lock me in the back of this thing with it and drop me off.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah, no, I'm kidding.

[Ken Coleman]

I'm kidding. That's not what you should do. Go talk to your local branch, get a plan, and go talk to a smartvestor pro.

[Dave Ramsey]

I love entrepreneurs. Don't forget, guys, I started my company on a card table myself. So I know what it's like to have people counting on you, your team, your family, not to mention your customers. And when you're the one signing the paychecks, you can't afford to fly blind. But I'll be honest. Early on, one thing that nearly sunk us was wasting time with spreadsheets that didn't add up because business units didn't talk to each other. I finally told my team, just fix it. And they did. We got Netsuite. That was years ago and we've never looked back. See, netsuite isn't just for tech giants. It's built for growing businesses like yours. Over 43,000 businesses already run on NetSuite, including a lot that started just like you. And now with built in AI, NetSuite is helping them even more. It's one system connected to every part of your business for real time insights, not guesswork. Netsuite AI flags inventory issues, cash flow risks, even supplier delays before they become problems. So you can trust the data, stop wasting time, and make the right decisions faster. Take a free product tour [e-mail] Ramsey. That's netsuite.com Ramsey.

[Ken Coleman]

All right. We wish we could get to every call and question here on the show. There's just so many calls, so little time. So if you have a money question and want an answer for your situation, you can now head to our website and use Ask Ramsey. This is our free AI tool that's built and trained on our proven Ramsey principles. You get an answer the same way we'd answer it right here on the show. So ask your question [e-mail] and click on Ask Ramsey. Or if you're watching on YouTube or listening to the podcast, you can click on the link in the show notes.

[Jade Warshaw]

You think if you, if you ask it a question, it'll say it in your kin voice?

[Ken Coleman]

No, I gotta tell you, it ain't gonna do that. I'll tell you what it will do. It's gonna give you fundamentals, but it ain't gonna give you my special sauce. The sauce, the juice. The way I would answer it. Not gonna be as pragmatic as me. I'll tell you that right now. Okay, buddy? Gonna get you your pure fundamental answer.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah, you will get a Ramsey plan answer.

[Ken Coleman]

There you go. Damian is up in Lincoln, Nebraska. Damian, how can we help today?

[Caller]

I just got a question for you. So I got this pile of debt that I've accumulated over the past couple of years. It started with just some small consumer debt and an auto loan started working on that. And then this past year I had a four wheeling accident that put me in a pretty big bind with a bunch of medical debt. I'd unfortunately dropped my parent, I dropped off my parents insurance and I forgot to sign myself up for my own when I rolled into my new job. So I got a pretty hefty pile there.

[Jade Warshaw]

Oh man.

[Caller]

So yeah, I'm kind of leaning between is it a go into chapter seven and just wipe the whole slate clean or I've gotten to the point where my income and expenses are all leveled out and I'm actually able to start paying down debt.

[Jade Warshaw]

How much is the medical tax?

[Caller]

210,000.

[Jade Warshaw]

Oh, wow. Okay. Do you now have insurance? Currently?

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay.

[Caller]

Yeah, I've always had it. I just forgot for the one year and I thought I'd be fine.

[Jade Warshaw]

Oh man, you got got, didn't you? That's. The odds of that are so crazy. Okay, so the 210, is that the only debt?

[Caller]

No, I have 19,000 in card, credit card debt that has went to collections. 18,000 on a auto loan that I had let go to repossession. 4,000 on student loans and then the 210.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay, was the credit cards in the repo a result of this injury? Is that kind of. Tell me more about that.

[Caller]

They would have been. Yeah, they would have been prior so years. I've been following you guys for like 10 years now. I had worked my way down on credit card and then we'd move to Lincoln and I built it back up during that whole moving process and just never paid more than the minimum. So that, that was there. And then with all those adding up, the auto payment was just killing me. So I should stop paying on it.

[Jade Warshaw]

Oh boy. Okay. And but you said you're steady now. Like what's your income today? What do you make, what do you bring home every month?

[Caller]

So before tax I'm 82,000 a year and then plus a bonus, but my take home monthly about 4700.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay, and the bonuses, do they hit like at the end of the year?

[Caller]

Yep, in October. And this last year we got a very minimal one. So like what, like see what this year ends up being what? 2,000.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay, okay, okay. Okay. So I would not do bankruptcy. I know that that probably Feels tempting. But I think what's gonna end up happening is you don't have a whole lot of money to give these creditors. Obviously you have a little bit, but you don't have much. And so I would start working with them on some sort of settlement pretty soon. How long have these been due? Have any of them rolled into collections?

[Caller]

So all of the cards are the medical is. I think one of them has. It was like a $20,000 one. The. With the biller at this time.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah. Okay, so for the one that's rolled into collections, you're now positioned to make some sort of a deal. And I would just do them one by one and roll them off, you know, whatever the smallest credit card is. I'd go over there and say this has been in collections for x amount of years and I'd stack up a little bit of cash. So for instance, what's the smallest credit card that you have in collections?

[Caller]

I think there's like three of them that are about $500.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay.

[Caller]

Easy payoffs.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah, but you're not paying 500 dol. I'd go to them and I'd say I can give you a hundred bucks and they're gonna take it and you're just gonna scratch em out just like that. The thing is, get it all in writing and I would just let em know. I'd be like, this is just the tip of the iceberg of the debt that I have. So if you think that you're getting any more money than this, you're not. And just be on em the same way they're on you, just call them and call them and call them and say, here's my offer, here's my offer. And they might come back and say, what about 250? Fine. At this point it's low enough. Yes, go ahead and take whatever deal they offer. But for the ones when you start getting into that medical debt, yeah, you're, you're gonna really whittle it down. And the key is try to save up, I don't know, 50% of what, what it is or try to save up, I don't know, 40% of what it is, cash. So you can be prepared to offer that money in cash.

[Caller]

Okay. On the. So with the auto one that it rolled over into collections, they are wanting to do a settlement for really cheap. Like I said, 18,000 is what I owe and they were wanting to do 900. The only thing that was concerning me is that they list on. They will file a 1099 on that. And I Was kind of confused on how that whole process worked.

[Ken Coleman]

Well, that's the least of your worries. 900 settlement on an 18. $18,000 debt on a car. You're taking that and you deal with it. So the 1099, Jade, that's just their way of. That's how they're writing it off. And then they. Because they're eating this big time. That's about them. That's. You have no choice in the matter.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Ken Coleman]

And it's a small amount of money. So back to Jade's point. Like, same thing on if somebody told you you were going to get some 1099 income, then you were going to go $1000 worth of landscaping, you would hold back.

[Dave Ramsey]

Right.

[Ken Coleman]

30% just to be safe. So you're just thinking about that. Talk to your tax pro, because you're starting to knock stuff off. So don't be concerned about that.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah. So what you need to be looking at is if you're trying to settle this, it's really common that you could settle a debt for anywhere between 30 to 50% of the balance if it's already in collections. So that' the range that you want to aim in. And if, you know it's a couple years old. Yeah. Push for that. That 30% of the. Of the balance. Okay. That's kind of where you want to be. You want to make sure that you have that lump sum, and you want to make sure that you have it all documented. I mean, this is when you get that letter. This is the one that you laminate and you put it. You put it in ice. You know, put it in ice and keep it forever. Okay.

[Ken Coleman]

It's true. I love that. Yeah. So, Damien. Yeah. I mean, you are actually working through this the right way. You don't need to file bankruptcy. You just settle these things one at a time. Now, the big question is, are you learning your lesson?

[Caller]

Oh, it is. It is learned many times over.

[Ken Coleman]

Yeah. Yeah. Well, and here's the deal. We ask that, by the way, not to put any kind of shame on you, but really, so that there's some conviction that's developed out of this. You know what I mean? Because none of us are sitting here without anything dumb. You've heard Dave say it for decades. I got a PhD in dumb. But this is the key, right? Get through this, but never again.

[Caller]

Yeah. No, this is not a journey I ever want to take again. That is for sure.

[Jade Warshaw]

And you're gonna have to deal with some. I mean, the truth is, you can't afford to pay all of these. So 1, 800 pay me is gonna be blowing up your line. And that right there is more detrimental. Yeah.

[Ken Coleman]

Speak to that. Cause you've actually walked through that. How does not just Damian, but other people that are experiencing it give them that mindset what their options actually are?

[Jade Warshaw]

Well, number one, it feels detrimental because they're calling you all the time and it makes you feel bad about yourself. Right. And that's the trap I don't want you to fall into because you do have a plan and you're sticking to your plan and that's really what you have to tell them. And if you even choose to pick up, you know, you pick up and you say, hey, this is my plan. You're next. Or I'm getting to you next. And when I get to you, you better be ready to make a deal. Uh huh. So that's kind of the way that goes. I'm more telling you it as a friendly warning if you get to the that you're able to make some minimum payments there, you could, but it's not really going to help you when it comes to settling it.

[Ken Coleman]

Yeah, really good advice. So hey, there is a way. Seems like you've got the will now and we're cheering you on and better days are ahead here. But you got to finish this, you got to clean up your mess and then we can rebuild after that. Tax season is coming up fast, which means a lot of you are paying more attention to your money and maybe realizing the holiday damage. So if you're trying to clean up the budget and start the year strong, cutting your phone bill is an easy win. With Boost Mobile, keep the phone you love and pay just 25 bucks a month for unlimited data, talk and text forever. No contracts, no traps, just predictable savings that help you stay in control. Switch [e-mail] Ramsey restrictions apply. See website for details. All right, let's go to Tyler, who joins us now in Wilmington, Delaware. Tyler, how can we help today?

[Caller]

So I'm in this relationship where I feel like I get leaned on financially pretty well and I'm very young and I do pretty well. As of right now, I have a lot of money saved up and I just am wondering the, you know, perspective that you guys may have on is that like a healthy relationship or should I be using this time at my age to generate more wealth than what I'm doing?

[Ken Coleman]

What is the relationship? Is this a marriage? Is this dating? What are we talking about?

[Caller]

Dating?

[Ken Coleman]

Okay, how long you been dating?

[Caller]

A year and a half.

[Ken Coleman]

Year and A half. How much money do you make?

[Caller]

135.

[Ken Coleman]

And. And you said you've been putting stuff away. Do you have any debt?

[Caller]

No debt.

[Ken Coleman]

And what kind of retirement situation are you starting to build?

[Caller]

I max out my 401k and then I have about in my private savings account just around $100,000, making me about 18% a year.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay, so tell me about the other person in this relationship. What do they do and how much do they make?

[Caller]

They are in mental health and they make around $50,000 a year with somewhere near 70, $80,000 in debt currently.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay, now let's get to the crux of the call.

[Caller]

Yes.

[Ken Coleman]

What do you mean by leaned on? Like, let's get real here. Like, we need, we need an example that really bothers you, either hurt you or angered you, or maybe one of each. I'm gather all this for, for Jade and I to be able to, to weigh in here. So give us some examples or one good example.

[Caller]

I would say like vacations and then like weekend funds, dates, everything along those lines.

[Jade Warshaw]

So you pay for the vacation?

[Caller]

Yes.

[Jade Warshaw]

The whole thing?

[Caller]

Yep.

[Ken Coleman]

And is it manipulative and how she puts that out there? Like, how is that decided?

[Caller]

No, it's more of just like, she knows that I know and that it's like really not even up for discussion.

[Jade Warshaw]

So. Who, who? Wait, wait, wait, wait.

[Ken Coleman]

How does she know that?

[Caller]

Yeah, well, just that, like, she knows that I know she's not in a great financial situation.

[Jade Warshaw]

All right.

[Caller]

Like, you know, in this young day and age, I feel like, you know, females want to do all the fun stuff and just because the situation, they may not be able to. It's just, he just went.

[Ken Coleman]

He just went. Females.

[Jade Warshaw]

Listen, when you say females that already let me know something has gone.

[Dave Ramsey]

I agree.

[Jade Warshaw]

That's caused you to be. You're feeling some type of way.

[Ken Coleman]

I haven't heard yet, Jade, anything where she's leaning on you.

[Jade Warshaw]

Well, that's what I'm going to get to. Tell me how the conversation goes down.

[Ken Coleman]

Yeah.

[Jade Warshaw]

Is it you saying, oh, it's, you know, it's July, we should probably go on vacation. What do you have in mind? Or is it her bringing up, hey, it's July, we should probably go on vacation. What do you have in mind? Like, tell me how the conversations go. And I need that because it's very different if you saying, hey, you know, let's go, let's go down to Fort Lauderdale. Lauderdale. And she's like, okay, and, and you're like, hey, I made the reservation for the Hilton. And she's like, okay. And then you just go versus her saying, where do you want to go, honey? And you're like, well, I don't know. And she says, well, I found this really cute place. I think we should go here. And then you're like, well, okay. Right. All of that matters. So I want to know how it goes.

[Caller]

I would say it's more of like, oh, we should do something. And then like, I'm a very minimalist person. And then perspective on there and gets a little starts that, you know, the standard starts to increase, and then it just kind of goes from there.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay, listen, I ain't saying she's a.

[Ken Coleman]

Gold digger, but she. I get the lean now, I think. Do you feel that I want to make sure I get the female perspective? I feel, okay. I get the lean. So where. Where are you relationally with this gal? Like, is this.

[Caller]

I don't. I don't live with them.

[Ken Coleman]

No, no, no. I'm not even. I wasn't even getting into that. I'm saying, what's your. On a scale of 1 to 10? 10 being she's absolutely one. I'm gonna marry her no matter what, or one being could care less if I'm in this relationship one more day. There's your extremes. Where are you at with her?

[Caller]

Yeah, I feel like I'm like, right in the middle. It's just like a little stuck situation.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay.

[Caller]

I do care about them, and you know what?

[Ken Coleman]

I mean, you care about her, but this is troubling you.

[Caller]

Yes.

[Jade Warshaw]

So what we need to decipher here is the line. And Ken, you're just the man to do this. We need to decipher the line between the classic chivalrous male behavior and I know, I'm. I'm choosing.

[Caller]

I would agree.

[Jade Warshaw]

Right.

[Caller]

I would agree.

[Jade Warshaw]

And then what is too much and kind of like the lean as what. What we called it? So I'm gonna start by saying yes. If you take me on a date. Especially like, yeah, you're not living together. Like, there's no, like, intent that we are in any way beyond dating. I'm expecting the male to pay every single time.

[Ken Coleman]

Totally agree. And I would say, yes, you should be paying for dates. You guys have been dating how many years?

[Caller]

Yeah, one and a half.

[Ken Coleman]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So you're paying for dates. However, when she comes up with an idea that is an expensive idea. And by the way, you get to determine what you feel is expensive. This is a two way shift.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yes. Money bags. Yes.

[Dave Ramsey]

That's Right.

[Ken Coleman]

And you're the money. So when she brings that up, you should feel free to say that feels like it's too much, and you can explain why.

[Jade Warshaw]

I agree.

[Ken Coleman]

And I think it's incumbent on you to explain why. Then if she follows up and goes, well, why, why? Why? Then you start to go, you know what? Some of this is on me because in the past you've suggested stuff that I would not normally pay for, given my views on money. And I've got a formula in place. I don't want to spend this one. You lay it all out so she knows where you're coming from. She shouldn't be guessing.

[Jade Warshaw]

On a vacation.

[Ken Coleman]

Yes, on a vacation.

[Jade Warshaw]

What's civil risk behavior? I'm thinking half and half.

[Ken Coleman]

It's half and half. But, but I'm saying he has to take that stand and, and think about it ahead of time and then say no. He has to feel comfortable going, yeah, I'm not comfortable going on a $6,000 vacation.

[Jade Warshaw]

I, I, I, I agree with that. I agree with that.

[Ken Coleman]

And then she goes, why? You explain it. And let's say you go, and I'm making this up. You go, I'm comfortable with a $2,000 vacation. Okay, great. So then you explain to her, but I think you should be paying for half of it. Well, I can't write now. And so we aren't going.

[Jade Warshaw]

Or we pick something more in your budget.

[Ken Coleman]

Yeah. And then go and let this bleed into, and I probably the wrong word. Let this lead into a bigger conversation about money so that you, my friend, can go from being a 5 to a 8, 9, or a 10 on whether or not we stay in this relationship. You're looking for certainty right now because, Jade, I'm going to bring it back to you. You're in the weeds on this and the data and you coach people because he's dating right now and he's five.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yes.

[Ken Coleman]

If this doesn't go to some certainty on whether or not they're a good fit from a value standpoint on money, this causes how many issues down the.

[Jade Warshaw]

Line it's gonna cause so many. I mean, it's the number one. Number two, depending on what piece of research you're looking at, cause of divorce, money fights, and money problems. So if this is somebody that you're starting to go down that path of, she might be the one. This is, to Ken's point, this is just the type of scenario where you can start these conversations to really see be what are each of your philosophies on money and now's not the time to try to change somebody. Now is the time to try to go, who are you for real?

[Ken Coleman]

Great point.

[Jade Warshaw]

You know, I want to see who you are for real.

[Ken Coleman]

Yeah.

[Jade Warshaw]

And. And vice versa.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah.

[Ken Coleman]

Now, if she says, okay, I. She needs to feel the weight.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yes.

[Ken Coleman]

Of this. And we hope, Tyler, that this goes one of two ways. My hope is, is that she reveals herself. Jade's absolutely right. And so once she reveals herself and what we mean by that is how she views money, at which point we now get to have a very serious conversation about how you view money. And is there a bridge to where we meet in the middle? And middle being? I'll help you and guide you and teach the principles that I've been living by. If you're willing to do it, that's meet in the middle here. And then you're going to find out really quick whether or not she values you enough to change her values about money.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yes. But the key strategy to what Ken is saying, and this is key, and this is for anybody listening. When you bring up the money conversation, the first question, you don't say your philosophy first.

[Ken Coleman]

Good.

[Jade Warshaw]

You let them say first. Because if they really like you and you say, oh, debt. Yeah. I don't do debt. They're gonna go, oh, yeah, me too.

[Ken Coleman]

Good point.

[Jade Warshaw]

If they really like you and they think that you. Right. People tend to kind of shape shift, especially in those early stages. So you first. First say, what's your philosophy on debt? And just shut up. Let them talk. Don't influence anything they're saying. You need to see this. You need to hear it. Then you go, okay, well, would you like to know mine?

[Ken Coleman]

Great point. So, Tyler, this feels like this is a massive, massive moment in this relatively young relationship. So step into it and let's see how this plays out.

[Jade Warshaw]

Out.

[Ken Coleman]

But you got a great head on your shoulders.

[Dave Ramsey]

Most people just drift through life with their money. No plan, no budget, stuck on autopilot. But winning with money is intentional. That's why I love Fairwinds Credit Union. They've built tools for people who don't want gimmicks or games. Their Smart bundle includes a High Yield savings account to help your emergency fund grow. And their Spend Smart Checking account won't nickel and dime you to death with fees like other banks. Plus, it comes with the Ramsey Beware debit card, which says, debt is normal. Be weird right on the front of it. It keeps you connected to your budget, and every time you use it, it's a reminder you control your Money, not the other way around. Fairwinds Credit Union is for people who are serious about taking control of their money. So if you're ready to stop drifting and start building wealth on purpose, open your smart Bundle today at Fairwinds.org Ramsey. That's Fairwinds.org Ramsey insured by the NCUA.

[Ken Coleman]

Welcome back to the Ramsey show in the Fairwinds Credit Union studio alongside the incomparable fair fabulous J D Warshaw. I'm just. Ken Coleman is the last name. Excited that you're with us? 8888-255225-88825-5225 is the number to jump in. All right, let's go to Jeff in Salt Lake City. Jeff, how can we help today?

[Caller]

Thanks for having me.

[Dave Ramsey]

Sure.

[Caller]

So I lost my job. I was a financial advisor. Lost my job back in, in June of 2025. I was without gainful employment for, gosh, almost five months. Took me five months to get hired on with another firm. And so now I am going. I mean, I still have not received a paycheck from my new job. And the whole situation has just been really a disaster for my family, for my home life, for my finances.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay, how long, how long have you been at the new job?

[Caller]

I hired on in November.

[Ken Coleman]

And what is the reason. Okay, what is the reason for you starting last November and you still haven't received a paycheck?

[Caller]

Trying to transition my old business over. When I was let go from my previous firm, probably half of my. My existing book of business was ready to move with me. And with everything taking so long, most of those clients have unfortunately moved on.

[Ken Coleman]

What kind of business are you in?

[Caller]

I'm a financial advisor.

[Ken Coleman]

So you left one firm and you've signed on with another firm, but it's basically straight commission. You're just. They're a place for you to hang your hat, essentially.

[Jade Warshaw]

You couldn't continue to serve those others independently until you landed at a. Another umbrella business.

[Caller]

I could not. So I was. I was terminated from that, from my original job. I had been with the firm for probably eight years. And when I was terminated, I mean, I had no. I mean, I could sit there and I could continue to contact them and talk with them, but ultimately they wanted somebody who could, you know, like, do the work.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah.

[Ken Coleman]

All right, so let's.

[Caller]

I couldn't do that.

[Ken Coleman]

All right, so for sake of time, let's get into what kind of disaster has happened so that we know what we're. And frame the question for us. So we need to know where you're at financially. But what can we help with specifically as you lay this out for us?

[Caller]

Yeah, so. So we have. We have blown through just about all of our savings.

[Ken Coleman]

How much is left in savings?

[Caller]

Maybe 10,000.

[Ken Coleman]

10,000. Okay, so how much debt do you have?

[Caller]

I think we only have about 15,000 in debt.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay, and when do you expect to make it? Like, have you. You. What's going on there? Are you finding new folks? Are you able to get the others fired back up again? What's the reality here?

[Caller]

It's been very slow. Right now I'm pulling in about two clients a month.

[Jade Warshaw]

What were you doing before? What was your normal month for you before?

[Caller]

I mean, before I managed to book a business of about $100 million. I mean, I was.

[Ken Coleman]

Yeah, but she's asking, how much did you make?

[Caller]

I was for 20, 25. I would. Have. Had I been. Had I remained employed, I would have made. I would have made probably 300,000 that year.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay. Oh, gosh, so you didn't really answer her question. When do you expect to actually get paid?

[Caller]

I should get paid this month.

[Ken Coleman]

How much?

[Caller]

The thing is that it could be 5,000.

[Ken Coleman]

Oh, boy.

[Caller]

I'm way off of where I was.

[Ken Coleman]

But we only have 15,000 in debt, correct?

[Caller]

Correct.

[Ken Coleman]

Yeah. Okay, then what is your. What is your monthly budget that you just bare minimum to take care of all the. The important things? How much do you have to be bringing in? What is that number?

[Caller]

I mean, take care of everything. I mean, we've got three kids, We've got school tuition and all that stuff, and we're probably at 10,000amonth.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay.

[Caller]

Is where I need to be.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay, you need 10,000amonth. Can I ask a question? What precludes you from being on your own as a financial advisor? What's the thing that stops you from just saying, hey, I. Jeff, I'm my own man, I'm my own business, and I. I can just run my business versus being under an umbrella because you don't really. With two clients, you don't really have the luxury of somebody taking a major piece of every chunk of money that you get. You see what I'm saying?

[Caller]

So I am considered independent at this point. I'm a 1099 advisor. Whereas at my previous firm, I was W2, and that firm was taking roughly 60% of the cut.

[Jade Warshaw]

And what's this firm taking?

[Caller]

They only take about 15%.

[Jade Warshaw]

Right. And my question remains, what's the benefit there for you? Because they're clearly not Giving you leads.

[Caller]

Correct. There are no leads. There's really no support.

[Ken Coleman]

No, it's on you. I've got a good friend who just got into this business two years ago. A couple things here to fast forward this. You're not in a massive debt situation. That's the good news. Your problem is your income. And you presented at the start of this call like there's some family stuff going on, but this is a point where you've got to make some money like, like right now. And you know how to build a book. Book of business, yes or no?

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Ken Coleman]

All right then. Then like, bro, we're in desperate. I. I don't have some magic pill of advice here. Three tips on how to win. As a financial planner, you actually know how to do it. You've got to do it now. In the meantime, I don't know what's going on and we don't have time. And quite frankly, I don't think it matters as to why you got fired, what it's done to your, your home life, because you mentioned it. But if your wife can work and is not working, we are in a season where she needs to because we have a $5,000 deficit that is hitting us really quickly and we only have $10,000 of savings left. So we're in go get it mode. Am I right, Jade? What am I missing?

[Jade Warshaw]

Well, I just want to remind you that you're the same guy who had. Who did $300,000 of income come last year. You're that same guy. I don't think you remember that. Like talking to you, it feels like you've forgotten that you're that guy. And that's why I'm encouraging you. I don't think you need, you know, whatever this umbrella company is. I think you can just go out there. I think you can, in the words of Dave Ramsey, kill something, drag it home and eat it. And I think that you're getting too hung up on these other details. I. To Ken's point, point. You know how to build a book of business and you've done it before. Nothing is stopping you from doing it again. I think the last five months really dinged your self esteem. But I mean, Ken, he's the same guy.

[Ken Coleman]

Yeah, I. Jeff, I'll just ask a point blank question. This is a yes or no answer. Are you dealing with a lot of shame?

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah.

[Ken Coleman]

Are you seeing a therapist?

[Caller]

On and off.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay. There's a book that I'm going to recommend to you and it's a heavy, heavy read. But it's worth reading. I've read it. In reading it, it's called Healing the shame that binds you by John Bradshaw. It's considered the, the, the, the foremost book written on shame. I think it's really important that you grasp the concepts in that book as well as therapy. But you got to throw your shoulders back right now. We don't have time to be ashamed, but it's a real feeling. It's underneath there. But I really recommend that you read that book that you lean in. But this is circle the wagons time with your wife. Let's go. We can figure this out. We absolutely can. And now we must. And, and what I'm hearing is a guy who, rightfully so, is ashamed of himself. We've all been there. But man, you have so much more to give. You're going to learn a lot through this season. So let's go, man. If you're looking for a more budget.

[Jade Warshaw]

Friendly way to save on medical costs and stay true to your values, Christian Healthcare Ministries is a great option to think about.

[Ken Coleman]

CHM is not health insurance.

[Jade Warshaw]

It's a health cost sharing ministry, a.

[Ken Coleman]

Biblical community based way for Christians to.

[Jade Warshaw]

Share each other's medical bills. That means no enrollment deadline and you can choose any doctor or hospital you want. That kind of freedom is big, especially if you're self employed between jobs or you just need something that fits your budget better. CHM has been around for decades faithfully serving the Christian community. And many members save hundreds of dollars a month compared to traditional health insurance.

[Ken Coleman]

And that margin gives you breathing room.

[Jade Warshaw]

When you're working the baby steps and trying to steward your money well. And right now CHM is offering new members a 50% credit towards their first.

[Ken Coleman]

Month of members get [e-mail] budget and.

[Jade Warshaw]

Use promo code RAMSEY. That's chministries.org budget and promo code Ramsey.

[Ken Coleman]

All right, next, next we go to Coeur d', Alene, Idaho. Alexandra is there. Alexandra, how can we help today?

[Caller]

Hi, my husband and I love you guys. You guys helped us so much get out of student debt when we were first married. I'm calling because I have a question, but my husband and I, we're not in total agreement on how to spend money now that we're out of debt. We are on baby step four and we're in the process of buying a home and we're trying to do it the Ramsey way. But now that we're in a better spot just learning how to spend money now, what it looks like specifically my stepsister and my best friend are both getting married out of the country this year, and I was hoping to attend their wedding, even though doing so will be expensive and my husband feels like traveling like this is really, like, financially irresponsible.

[Jade Warshaw]

Oh.

[Caller]

But he said if I called you guys and got your permission, that we could go.

[Jade Warshaw]

So I just, like, this is our favorite.

[Ken Coleman]

You couldn't have, in my opinion, couldn't have got two better co hosts today because we have disagreed on these things from time to time. And I'll just tell you, I don't know. I'm usually more lenient.

[Jade Warshaw]

I don't know if we'll disagree to.

[Ken Coleman]

Say, Jade, we don't know. It's starting off pretty good.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah, I heard baby step four, so it's already looking good.

[Ken Coleman]

Couple, quick clarifying questions. You said two weddings? Yes.

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Ken Coleman]

Stepsister and best friend.

[Caller]

Yes.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay. And where are both weddings?

[Caller]

One is in Italy and one is in Sri Lanka.

[Dave Ramsey]

Oh.

[Ken Coleman]

Neither one of those are discount airlines. Airlines. So that's. That's going to be. Have you run the numbers on what these trips are going to cost?

[Caller]

Both together, I think together would be about $10,000.

[Jade Warshaw]

What's the time frame? Are they both over the summer or are they spread out at all?

[Caller]

One is in May and one is in August.

[Jade Warshaw]

Oh, lordy. Which one's in May?

[Caller]

The Italy one.

[Jade Warshaw]

Is that. Is that the best friend? No, that's the stepson sister.

[Caller]

Yes.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay, is. Is hubs included in this number? Is he going with you on both?

[Caller]

He's going with me for one. Not for the other, though, because we have a toddler and we think it'd be too much for the toddler.

[Ken Coleman]

Yeah, 100%. So, by the way, so just clarifying, it's 10,000 for you to go to both and him to go to one.

[Caller]

Right.

[Jade Warshaw]

Which one is he going to?

[Caller]

The one with my stepsister in Italy.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay, good choice. So the first one.

[Ken Coleman]

Good choice. I like his choice. So do you have the money? Do you have the money set aside?

[Caller]

Not yet, but right now we do every dollar and we have about like 2,000 after, like, retirement and all of our necessary expenses. So I think if we save for the next couple of months, we could easily save up for it, but we haven't done so.

So. Yes.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay. So I love solving these with what I'm gonna call the financially responsible adult checklist, which is gonna give you some freedom here.

[Ken Coleman]

I'm glad you're doing this.

[Jade Warshaw]

Listen, I've already kept my eyes roll.

[Ken Coleman]

I'm already ready to Decide. I'm already ready. I've already decided.

[Jade Warshaw]

I mean I think I have two, but I'm giving her the framework on how we arrived.

[Ken Coleman]

This is good.

[Jade Warshaw]

So there's five things in the financially responsible adult checklist. Number one, are you a person who's on a budget? Yes. You mentioned every dollar beautifully several times. Check, check. A person who is out of debt and plans to stay out of debt. Check, check. Number three, are you a person who carries the proper insurances? Now this means have you started your term life insurance? You've got a little one there. One of you depends on each other's income. If you haven't done that, you need to do that before you make this.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay, let's get an answer. Where are we at on that one?

[Caller]

We both have life insurance.

[Ken Coleman]

Check.

[Jade Warshaw]

I had lasso. Okay, that's number three is are you a person who is saving for the future? Now this means three things. You've got your baby step one. You already did that. You've got baby step three in place.

[Caller]

Yes, yes, yes. That's retirement, right?

[Jade Warshaw]

No, no, no. Baby step three is three to six months of expense.

[Caller]

Yes.

[Ken Coleman]

They, she said they were on baby step four.

[Dave Ramsey]

Is that right?

[Ken Coleman]

Okay.

[Jade Warshaw]

And you're act, you're actively doing the 15% to retirement.

[Caller]

Right.

[Jade Warshaw]

And are you actively putting something towards a down payment on a house? You mentioned that.

[Caller]

Yes, we're in escrow right now actually.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yes.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay. That's four out of four.

[Jade Warshaw]

That's four. And then there's a fifth one. The fifth one on the financially responsible list is. Are you prioritizing generosity?

[Caller]

Yeah, we tithe.

[Jade Warshaw]

Listen, that's all you need. That's all you need. Everything else is you just go to cash.

[Ken Coleman]

The tough one to get through is going to always be Jade. She's just tougher than me. She just is. No surprise.

[Jade Warshaw]

I, I lift with weights, kid.

[Ken Coleman]

Yes, you do. And showing off the guns again. Again. So the fact that you guys can actually cash flow. This, this is a no brainer. Tell hubs that you have two yeses.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yes.

[Ken Coleman]

And this is an American Idol. So you only need two.

[Jade Warshaw]

In the words of Clubber. In the words of Clubber Lang.

[Ken Coleman]

Ding, ding, ding, ding. I love the Rocky reference. Fantastic. Alexander sounds like it's going to be a blast.

[Jade Warshaw]

Have fun.

[Caller]

Oh, thank you.

[Ken Coleman]

And good for you by the way. Love that you guys. And by the way, let's just be very clear to our greater audience here, she doesn't need our permission. We're having a little bit of fun with this, but I Love that you listen to Jade walk through those five boxes. That's fantastic. And in this case, I love too that they were like, I'll go to the one in Sri Lanka and I'll stay back. That's great. You don't always have to both be there.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah, you don't have to do that.

[Ken Coleman]

It's the thought that counts.

[Jade Warshaw]

Plus, let's be honest, does any man ever want to go to a wedding? Ken.

[Ken Coleman]

No, I've been very clear on this. No dude ever wants to go.

[Jade Warshaw]

Even. Even a destination wedd. Destination doesn't zing it up for you?

[Ken Coleman]

No. In fact, if Stacy said to me tonight, hey, we've been invited to a wedding in Barbados.

[Jade Warshaw]

You love Barbados.

[Ken Coleman]

I love and been to Barbados. But I would be in but slightly irritated. And if she said to me, well, you don't have to go to the ceremony, then I would be like, oh.

[Jade Warshaw]

I'm totally in right now. You're just her sidekick.

[Ken Coleman]

Yeah, I'm just travel buddy.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah, travel buddy.

[Ken Coleman]

We're there in Barbados. Barbados. I don't have to go to the ceremony. But if you say you gotta go to the ceremony, I'm telling you I have a bad attitude about going to Barbados. And this is my point exam, which I shouldn't have ever.

[Jade Warshaw]

Now what if it was all you have to do is go to the reception? Does that change it? No, ceremony, only reception.

[Ken Coleman]

No one's ever asked me this before.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah, that does change it.

[Ken Coleman]

Yeah. Because I think I don't have to sit through the ceremony and all the formalities.

[Jade Warshaw]

Straight to the drink, straight to the wedding cake.

[Ken Coleman]

Yeah. Well, my follow up question is, is there rum at the reception?

[Jade Warshaw]

There better be. It's in Barbados.

[Ken Coleman]

Then I'm in. There you go. Columbia, South Carolina is where we go next. Kevin is waiting. Kevin, how can we help?

[Caller]

Yes, I've got a scenario here we're trying to figure out. We bought a home one year ago. We put 10% down at 7%. We then sold our other home home, and we have now we have one year. They said you can recast. We have 200,000 cash right now in the bank that we're looking at putting at recasting or refining the current to bring down the mortgage, get rid of pmi, all that good stuff. But in our new home, we're also looking at holding maybe 50,000 cash aside, because there's certain things we'd like to do, home improvements like a retaining wall, a fence, additional parking space spots, things like that. And if we want to make a good Wise financial decision on return on investments and you know, and putting our money in the best place possible. We want to know what your, your advice would be and what we should consider.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay, let me just make sure I understood it back. You talked really fast. I think I got all of it. There were two houses, one sold. Now there's only one, the most expensive one. You want to put 200,000 possibly to recast it so the payment's lower. Did I catch it?

[Caller]

We have. There was. Yes, there was two. We sold one. And now. Exactly now we want to recast. So you're thinking out of that 200k.

[Jade Warshaw]

But you're thinking maybe hold back 50 for the, for the improvements.

[Caller]

We're kind of thinking hold back 50 because we have some home improvement ideas. But we want to make sure we don't overbuild the neighborhood. I want to know do I get this money back or is it better to put it into recasting the current house?

[Jade Warshaw]

So tell me. Well, really most, most of this rides greatly on the recast. When you, if you put the whole 200,000 on the recast, is it going to get your monthly payment where it needs to be 25% of your take home?

[Caller]

It currently is already. It's our mortgage is currently within 25% of our take home pay. Currently already.

[Jade Warshaw]

So then what's the purpose of recasting? Why wouldn't you just put it, apply it towards the person principal and just pay down the house?

[Caller]

Well, they said if you recast is what we were told, if you recast within a year, you can put that money and it'll, it'll lower the month, the mortgage payment as well.

[Jade Warshaw]

It will, it will, but less money will go to the principal. So what by you doing that you're kind of shifting everything towards if you just had a smaller payment. The smaller payment means less goes to the principal and the less goes to interest or the same amount goes to interest. So you're robbing your principal payment at that point. So that's why I wouldn't do that. I would just apply it to the principal. If you want to pay the mortgage.

[Ken Coleman]

If you're waking up tired every morning, you don't need more caffeine, you need better rest. And that's why Casper mattresses are engineered to help you sleep deeper and wake up refreshed. And this isn't just one George's opinion. Thousands of five star reviews prove it. Plus Casper mattresses ship free and come with a hundred night trial. So you've got nothing to lose. Sleep is a must and you deserve the best. So go to Casper.com Ramsey and use promo code Ramsey for 25% off mattress mattresses and 10% off everything else. That gives you up to 1200 bucks off the Snowmax mattress, which is the exact one I sleep on every night. That's Casper.com Ramsey code Ramsey exclusions apply. All right, one of the. Do a quick follow up. Jade, I know you wanted to say a little bit more about our last caller to do some clarification.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah, I want to talk about the recasting because we don't get that call a lot and it's actually an interesting thing that you could put a lump sum if, let's pretend you have a mortgage that's, you know, the payments, it's, it's eating your lunch, it's a little too high. Maybe you come into a lump sum of money, maybe you've just been able to save up somehow some way, whatever you come across, 20, 30, 40. And in his case it was $200,000 dollars that he wanted to instead of do what we teach, which is apply a principal payment, extra payment and just lower the, the, the principal, the entire balance completely. He wanted to recast it, which basically what it does, let's pretend he bought the house for 400,000. I think he told us it was at 7%. When you recast it, the, the, the lump sum would go directly to there. And so they're now they're rec, be recasting the balance at the new, the new amount. So It'd be at 200,000 but the terms are still the same. So it'd still be at 7%, it'd still be on a 30 year mortgage. So I suggested what I suggested which is only put it towards the principal, don't recast because the point here is to pay the thing off fast. Like we want you to pay the mortgage off. If he recasts it, since the terms are the same, it's still on a 30 year or a 15 year, whatever he has had and it's not going directly in that way. So if he, if he wanted to, and I'm not saying that this is the best thing, if he did recast it and then he still paid the mortgage as though it was the old mortgage. That could kind of be a move. But really the only benefit there I could see is like, I don't know, it's almost like a contingency. Like if I fell on hard times, my payment would be lower. But that's not really the Ramsey Way. The better way here is to go. Go for the principal, go for paying off the mortgage. Saving time. Time is of the essence, so you can take that money and later on use it to build other types of wealth.

[Ken Coleman]

Love it. All right, great clarification there. The number to jump in 888-255-225. Kate is up next in Newark, New Jersey. Kate, how can we help?

[Caller]

Yes, hi, Ken and Jade. First of all, I want to say thank you so much for taking my call. I'm nervous.

[Ken Coleman]

Don't worry. We are on your team. We're care of you.

[Caller]

Thank you so much. You're my favorite duo, by the way. I listen to you guys every day.

[Ken Coleman]

Well, now we're gonna be extra nice. Now look what you've done. What's going on?

[Caller]

How can we help?

My question is so real quick. I'll just give you my question and then whatever details you need, just ask. The question I have is I don't know if we'll be able to continue making house payments because my husband is a spendthrift and we can't keep up with our monthly minimums due to how much debt he's racked up in the year that we've had. This is that we bought our house and now we are paycheck to paycheck.

[Jade Warshaw]

We're house.

[Ken Coleman]

What, what has he racked up?

[Caller]

$12,000 in credit card debt in a year.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay. What is the minimum payment on that? 12,000.

[Caller]

So it's all different. It's six different. Actually seven different credit cards.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay.

[Caller]

The monthly minimum. Yeah. Are about $715 a month.

[Jade Warshaw]

Wow.

[Caller]

For all of them.

[Ken Coleman]

What's your mortgage payment?

[Caller]

Yeah.

3138.

[Ken Coleman]

What's your combined incomes?

[Caller]

So I'm not currently working. Well, I'm a stay at home mom. He makes net 140,000 a year.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay. And is he feeling this weight? We know you are. Is he feeling this?

[Caller]

I don't think he's feeling it as much as. He's definitely not feeling it as much as I am. But I laid it all in front of him basically to show him like how, like everything on paper. And he kind of got it, I think. But this was back in November and at the time he had agreed. He loves Klarna and Sezzle and I don't, I hate them. But he thinks that it's fine to pay the dude the pain for things because no interest or whatever. So he agreed in November not to spend on those for Christmas gifts. And I thought that we were on the same page. He had agreed and come to find out he actually did use clarinet and sezzle. And he actually just finished paying off the last payment this past week. But we almost weren't able to make our car payment. We had to try to get scrounge around for cash to pay for our car payment.

[Ken Coleman]

So this was very recent. Recent. And I want to get Jade involved here, but I'm just kind of gathering some more information here. What was his, what were the comments? What has the conversation been? We know what happened November. Now here we are just the other day, scrambling around for quarters, if you will, to make a car payment. What was the conversation then?

[Caller]

It's almost like he doesn't really want to have the conversation. He. It's almost like he's digging his head in the sand. He doesn't want to face the consequences. And a little backstory. He is a recovering alcoholic. And I really, truly believe that the spending, it's because it's what, script based.

[Ken Coleman]

It's a replacement that changes the equation. Jade, I know you've got thoughts. I want you to weigh in here for her.

[Jade Warshaw]

Well, I mean, definitely the reveal of the past. Alcoholism plays a big role in this. I wonder, would he be open? Have you said that to him? That you're, this is your fear and this is how you're perceiving this?

[Caller]

I have said it to him. We actually are in marriage counseling. We're in individual counseling.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay, good.

[Caller]

Which thankfully, it's covered by our insurance. We have, he has very good insurance with his wife and we are in marriage counseling. But so far it, we're working on addressing it, but it's like slow going. It's not getting anywhere. It's getting. Yeah, it's very slow going.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay. Yeah. I mean, we can talk about numbers, but this really is just beyond a numbers equation. I mean, just really quickly, I can tell you Your mortgage is 35% of your take home pay, it seems like, which is already a little high. I mean, it's nothing to like freak out over. But when you add 715 bucks a month of credit card debt. Yeah, you're gonna feel it. So that's the mechanics. Mechanics, you know, numbers, wise of why you're feeling this a little bit more. But the truth is, until he gets a handle on why he's spending and what the issue is, it's going to be a problem. Now, I don't know if you've suggested this in, in counseling. I'm trying to put myself in your shoes. If I were in your shoes, What I would bring to my counselor is this. I would say I believe clearly my husband has struggled with addiction. I think that he has found a way to not use alcohol anymore. But I feel like it's shifted to spending. And because of that, I'm starting to think that maybe for a season I should be the one to handle the finances since his addiction seems to be functioning in our money. Do you handle those problems?

[Ken Coleman]

I had a question about that anyway. It's a very good point. Do you handle the finances or is.

[Caller]

He so interesting you say that? I have been asking to do the budgeting and everything as a partnership together. So far, he has not really wanted to do it. He just wants me to do it. But at the same time, I think that's good. Just recently, he just recently put his direct deposit into the joint account. Up to now, literally last week, it hasn't been. So he finally put in a joint account and he. He's kind of like washed his hands of it. He's like, doesn't want anyone. He left it all to me.

[Ken Coleman]

That is great news. Now I want to jump in really quick because our time is limited. Practically speaking, do you both have car payments or is it just one? I thought I heard car payments.

[Caller]

It's just his. Yeah, mine is paid off.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay, because I'm wondering what you can start to do since he's taking the hands off. So we need to look at selling that car. That's going to be a tough conversation, but I'm looking at what are some.

[Caller]

Quick things for that.

[Ken Coleman]

I get it, I get it. It's why I acknowledged may not be the right one to go after right now, but with you now taking over the finances, what can you do? Can you cancel the credit cards? If your name's on them, you cancel the credit cards today. Let's make this a real pain for him. Jade, I want to bring you back into that. You got about a minute. What would you practically do if you were her?

[Jade Warshaw]

I would. I would make it more formal. I love that he shifted it that way, but I would almost, like I said, with your counselor, decide the best way to do this. He doesn't need access to the money on his own. He just doesn't because he's proven that he can't control spending, and that is an addiction. Spending is an addiction, especially it looks like it in his case. And so I would take. Take a little tougher stance on that and say, okay, I. When you say I'm in charge of the money, that means I'm going To distribute in the way that I'm going to distribute it, which this is only for a season until you can get well again. And then we'll be really 50, 50 on this again. And I would take a pretty strong stance on that because your family, their safety is at stake and so is yours.

[Caller]

Sam, Foreign.

[Ken Coleman]

Tax season is here. I know gave you all collective indigestion, but you gotta do it. You gotta get a free checklist, by the way, and guides from us. And this [e-mail] taxes so again, the checklist and the guides that help you file. Make the right decisions, get the right people on your team, depending on your unique situation. Ramseysolutions.com taxes edwin is up next in Minneapolis. Edwin, how can we help?

[Caller]

Hey, guys. Hey. Thanks for taking my call. I am in the middle of maybe deciding to make a huge career change. As in, I currently am self employed on my family dairy farm. Farm. I own all the cows and rent the land, but I'm not sure if that's where I'm supposed to be. And I am looking to maybe go do a change of career to firefighting out west or something along that line.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay, I'm gonna step in here, Edwin, and I'm going to take a guess. Tell me fire wrong. That you absolutely know deep down that you're not supposed to be running the dairy farm. True or false?

[Caller]

Yeah, I don't. I can't answer that specifically.

[Ken Coleman]

Why.

[Caller]

I do, I do, I do love the animals. And it is maybe something to do with the fact that I'm the youngest and I sort of felt that I was supposed to take it it, but.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay, let me reword it a different way. Okay, let's say that that might happen. Let's say that right now in my ear. Kelly, who's producing our show today, she says, hey, Ken, we just got a call from this fire department out west and they need someone like Edwin. They got a great job for him right now. Edwin, how do you react to that emotionally?

[Caller]

Well, I couldn't take it right now. I. I didn't ask you that.

[Ken Coleman]

Edwin. You got it. Hold on a second. Hold on, hold on, hold on.

[Caller]

I would want to take it.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay. What would your heart do?

[Caller]

Pretty excited.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay. It's a simple question. I understand we have realities, but this is why you called the show today. And so, so, okay, so let's keep playing this out. Your heart would be going crazy, but you'd have to unwind some things on the dairy farm. True or false?

[Jade Warshaw]

Right.

[Caller]

I would have to Figure out a way to keep it going or make sure that it's not just going to fall apart.

[Ken Coleman]

How would you do that? Keep it high level. Don't get in the weeds. What would you have to accomplish for that to be the fact?

[Caller]

Find somebody to run it or create a partnership with my brothers that are still in the area, but they would have to sacrifice to do that as well. Then all of a sudden, it becomes about Edwin. And I'm not sure that, like doing that to my family.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay, is this entire business on your shoulders? Did somebody tell you that it.

[Caller]

Dad owns the land. I am in charge of everything running it. I own the cows. Like I'm charged. Incomes, expenses. Everything is on my shoulders.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay, but that's not your dad's business. Your dad owns the land. The land is valuable whether there's milk cows on there or not. True or false?

[Caller]

Yep.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay. So if you shut the thing down. Okay, well, this is horrible, but it's going to make my point. If you get hit by a bus today, Dad's land. Dad doesn't lose a nickel on the land. True or false?

[Caller]

That would be true.

[Ken Coleman]

So whose business is the dairy business?

[Caller]

The dairy business is mine 100%.

[Ken Coleman]

And Edwin doesn't want to be in the dairy business. But you've calculated this thing and you've. You've tied hide your responses to the fact that if you go chase your dream and do what you really want to do and fight fires out west, that you're somehow letting the family down. But best I can tell by your words, Jade, if I missed something, I don't think so. That this is actually your business to decide what you want to do with. True or false?

[Caller]

True. So it feels like Edwards would definitely come cut my. Cut me off, probably from my family.

[Jade Warshaw]

Why would they be so.

[Caller]

My dad. My dad would not be happy. My dad would not be happy. He spent his whole life building this thing up.

[Ken Coleman]

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. You just told us that the dairy business is yours.

[Jade Warshaw]

He just has the land. He's just been offering the land.

[Caller]

Yeah, I mean, like, he. He literally sold me the cows. And like nobody else on the family is technically at home running.

[Ken Coleman]

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

[Caller]

And he's trying.

[Ken Coleman]

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Edward, stop. You paid your dad a fair price for the cows.

[Caller]

I did. Yeah.

[Jade Warshaw]

He didn't give them to you?

[Caller]

No, he didn't.

[Ken Coleman]

I. I gotta tell you, I'm not sure that you're correct. I think you're scared to death to leave Your family and you've concocted some drama that may not be true. Is that possible?

[Caller]

That is possible.

[Ken Coleman]

Well, I'm gonna tell you, I'm working.

[Caller]

With my brothers on this, but.

[Ken Coleman]

Well, what do they say about all know this?

[Caller]

Well, they're both on the fence of you should go, and then there's some that say you should stay home and.

[Ken Coleman]

All right. I think the time has come on this call. All right, Edwin, I think the time has come on this call to where you need to hear a different voice. And my kids, I could tell them everything, the gospel truth, great wisdom, and they'd not listen to me. And a coach or a teacher tells them, and they listen. So I'm checking out because I've already walked you through. I didn't even tell you anything. I walked you into a corner. You're terrified. You're terrified, and you're letting your fear all of a sudden become ration. The rationale for you to not leave. I'm going to bring Jade in, who's been listening the entire time. She's the voice you need to hear. Jade, I. I give you the balance of my time.

[Jade Warshaw]

I really think that you are. Well, yeah, Ken. Ken has nailed it. I'm only going to reiterate what he. He said. I think you're well within the bounds to pursue firefighting. I think it is your business, therefore, you get to decide what happens with it. It sounds like you know what that would look like or what that could look like. And it's okay. I also, if you are correct in what you think might happen as far as the reactions of your family, they get to react, and you can't control what their reaction is. And it's not your job to control what their reaction may or may not be. You can speculate about it, but you can't control. Control it. And you certainly can't let someone else's reaction of what they think you should be doing with your life stop. You.

[Ken Coleman]

You can't cry over spilled milk.

[Caller]

Very true.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay.

[Caller]

That's right. You know, do that.

[Ken Coleman]

I mean, I've been sitting there. I mean, what are we doing here? I think mom and dad will be proud. I think the fact that your brothers told you to do it. And here's the other side of this, Edwin. And we've said this a million times on this show.

[Caller]

If you don't do this, I've heard it.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay, well, then you know what I'm about to say. If you don't do this for the reasons that you've given Us. You're going to end up resenting people that you care so deeply about that.

[Jade Warshaw]

You, by the way, just made an assumption about.

[Ken Coleman]

Or what?

[Caller]

I will regret myself taking a leap?

[Ken Coleman]

Well, I went ahead of that. The resentment becomes of the regret. So regret hits us first, and then we start looking for places. Places to put the blame on. And we'll put the blame on the family members who actually never had the power. As Jade, so beautifully said. So my point is, I jumped ahead. Resentment comes after regret.

[Caller]

Yeah, that's very true.

[Ken Coleman]

Listen, man, eat more chicken. Sell them dairy cows. Let's go. I got no puns left. That's all I got. I only had two, but I think you got to do it, Edwin. And I'm as serious as I can be for a moment. You're a young man who has a feeling in your heart. The reason I started off this call, and Jay's heard me do this a hundred thousand times, and I do it privately, too. The test is always the heart test. You cannot put enough value on how your heart and your body feel. And if anybody's ever felt it, the call to something or a draw to something, it is undeniable, is it not, Jade?

[Jade Warshaw]

You can't stop it. You cannot stop it.

[Ken Coleman]

So what say.

[Jade Warshaw]

What say you is who cares if your dad has a cow over you selling this business?

[Ken Coleman]

That's it.

[Jade Warshaw]

You. You got to move on.

[Ken Coleman]

Look what you did. See, I had nothing left. And you came in over the top.

[Caller]

The puns are flying.

[Ken Coleman]

The puns are flying because the truth is so clear. It's time to move forward. And by the way, this is your life.

[Caller]

Okay?

[Jade Warshaw]

It's your life.

[Ken Coleman]

It's your life. You got to make the calls for your life, man. And. And, boy, you're going to go out there and you're going to do some great work.

[Jade Warshaw]

So I hear the excitement already.

[Ken Coleman]

I, too. I feel like you feel a little lighter, right?

[Caller]

Yeah, no, it's definitely.

[Ken Coleman]

And listen, if you want to keep one of the cows, keep one of the cows. I think it'd be so cool to have just a pet dairy cow.

[Jade Warshaw]

Oh, yeah.

[Ken Coleman]

They're great looking.

[Caller]

The ones with the bangs.

[Jade Warshaw]

The bangs in their face.

[Ken Coleman]

They were always my favorite cows at the fair.

[Jade Warshaw]

Oh, yeah.

[Ken Coleman]

They're sweet, the dairy cows.

[Jade Warshaw]

And here you are making a sandwich out of it.

[Ken Coleman]

Ken, I'd moo if I could. Welcome back to the Ramsey show and the fair Winds Credit Union Studies Studio. I'm Ken Coleman. Jade Warshaw is alongside. The Phone number is 88882. 552-25-888-255225. Toby's up next in Phoenix, Arizona. Toby, how can we help?

[Caller]

Well, I have. I've built up some debt. I'm 62 years old and about ready to claim Social Security, But I have about $79,000 in debt. And I got a letter from the consolidating to consolidate it by stopping your credit cards. And so that was the first question I've kind of listened over and looked at the show. It doesn't, you know, like, that's a bad idea from what I hear you guys say. Or is it a bad idea? Or. And I own three houses. Okay, tell us about those houses.

[Jade Warshaw]

I'm gonna go. Short answer, likely, Yes. I. Short answer, yes. Debt consolidation, it is not the answer to this situation. It rarely. I would never suggest it as the answer. The reason is what it's doing is something you could do, which is not pay your debts. Pool the money. And then when they're ready to settle now you can make a settlement. That's all they're doing. And they're just doing. With fees attached. So you don't need help doing that. Tell us about the three houses because your, your solution is likely there.

[Caller]

Well, the thing is I have renters and I rented for forever. And to sell one of the houses, I'd have to be putting a family out.

[Jade Warshaw]

That's true.

[Caller]

And they really aren't in that position. And so far I haven't been able to do it. And I have problems there. Just because they have five kids.

[Jade Warshaw]

Are your prices competitive or are you giving them some sort of a deal that they wouldn't be able to get elsewhere?

[Caller]

I'm probably, I'm very, very low on, on that house that I would sell.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay, let's go to the other two. We'll. Let's set that one aside. We appreciate your heart. What about the other two houses? Give us the numbers.

[Caller]

One house spreads for 1350. It would sell for 170,000.

[Ken Coleman]

How much would you make on that?

[Caller]

Oh, I don't know anything on the houses.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay, so it's all. It's all profit.

[Ken Coleman]

That's house number two. Let's go to house number three.

[Caller]

House number three is. It's basically a rental apartment, but it's a home, but it's not very big.

[Ken Coleman]

How much is it worth? If you sold it today, how much would you pocket?

[Caller]

It's on my property, on my house, where I own a house.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay.

[Caller]

So I couldn't sell that part of it. You know what I'm saying it's just a spare house.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay, so. And you just happened to figure out.

[Ken Coleman]

A way just, just for the heck of it, what is the house that the family of five or the family of seven with five kids, how much is that house worth.

[Caller]

Down the street? In one. One other house? One for 170.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay, so this is, this is a no brainer to me.

[Ken Coleman]

Ken, can I ask a question before because I know what you're going to do. I just am curious. For a guy who's got two cash houses, why do you have $79,000 in. In debt?

[Caller]

I spent too much.

[Ken Coleman]

But you paid off these other houses, right?

[Caller]

Well, I paid off the other houses a while ago. Oh. Basically I paid cash. I turned in my 401 or my, my retirement. When it dropped so much in 2008, I got upset that they took all that money. I lost a lot and so I took the rest of it, paid the fees and bought these houses.

[Jade Warshaw]

Oh, gosh. So you have Nothing in a 401k?

[Caller]

Oh, I have nothing now.

[Jade Warshaw]

Understood. So your income, your income will be. So then, then go back and tell me again, what's the rent from house number one with the family of five? What, what's your rent on that? What do you take?

[Caller]

Eleven. Eleven hundred.

[Jade Warshaw]

And, and what goes away in, in, in fees and upkeep? What. What do you actually pocket? As.

[Caller]

There'S not much fees and I haven't been much fees and upkeep over the last couple years.

[Jade Warshaw]

Well, I mean, certainly you take some.

[Caller]

I haven't had any problems.

[Jade Warshaw]

Certainly you take money out in case the AC goes out or in case it needs a repair.

[Caller]

I'm a plumber.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay.

[Caller]

So I kind of fix things.

[Jade Warshaw]

All right, so for round numbers, for round numbers, I'll use the 1100, but I want to encourage you to know what the numbers are. Less upkeep, because that's going to give you a clearer picture of how well this is doing. Tell me, tell me the rent on number three, the one that's on your property.

[Caller]

A thousand.

[Jade Warshaw]

A thousand. So, so far we've got 2100. And what's it take? Are you going to be drawing. You said you're going to draw Social Security here soon. What will that be?

[Caller]

Yes. 2000.

[Jade Warshaw]

2000. Do you think you can hold on until later so you can get a high amount?

[Caller]

No, I, I've already signed up for it and I don't know, some health problems. I'm not sure I want to wait.

[Ken Coleman]

Are you currently employed?

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay.

[Caller]

I work for myself, I own a plumbing business.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay, great. What do you pay yourself out of the plumbing business?

[Caller]

I basically don't know. I pay, I pay for the plumbing parts and the plumbing bills and then I pay my taxes. Are you bus check?

[Ken Coleman]

Are you busy?

[Caller]

I work as I work. I work as much as I want every day.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay.

[Caller]

I don't push it as hard as I used to because you're health eight to 12 hours a day.

[Ken Coleman]

Well you got no, you got no retirement. You got no retirement. So you need to sell at least one of these houses and clear up the debt and then Jade walk you through. You've got to start reinvesting in now.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah. So I mean here's the thing. We need real numbers. I have a feeling obviously you don't have a budget. What I'm gathering is you're bringing in somewhere around 4,000 to 4,100amonth plus whatever plumbing you do. We don't know what that amount is. The equation we need is how much does it cost for you to run your lifestyle minus the debt? Because we're going to pay the debt off. So we need to find out how much does it take to keep the lights on, keep the water going, keep food on the table, keep the vehicles running. If it's 4100, you're okay. Okay. And, and you can make this work. What I would suggest is just what Ken said. We're going to sell house number two and we're going to take the, you know, 79 of the 100,000 and we're going to pay off the debt and then you're going to take 90,000 and I would say keep three to six months of expenses out, keep that in a high yield savings account and then the rest you're going to plop it in some nice mutual funds. And if you, if you can after the this call go to ramseysolutions.com smartvestor I believe is what it is. And I, I want you to get with a smartvestor pro because investing some of this money is going to be helpful for you. It's not going to be the break free point for you. I think at this point, I think at this point for you keeping these paid for real estate is going to help you live like you can't afford to sell these just yet. So keeping the rent on them is probably going to be a big a good move for, for you. And if you get to the point where you can no longer be a landlord, you're selling those and you're popping Those into a 401k. I'm sorry. Into a Roth IRA as well.

[Ken Coleman]

Really? So you don't think you should sell one to clear the 79?

[Jade Warshaw]

If he sells it, he doesn't have any income. I told him to. No, he's got. No, no, no. I told him to sell number two.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay, good.

[Jade Warshaw]

Oh, okay. I'm talking about the other two. The one that's on his property. He can't sell that one anyway.

[Ken Coleman]

I agree. But I would tell you the one with a family of seven with five kids, appreciate your heart, but they need to at least be paying market rent.

[Jade Warshaw]

That's true.

[Ken Coleman]

And then at the same time, if you need to unload that to take care of yourself, you can give them plenty of advance notice to where you're not kicking them out.

[Jade Warshaw]

That's true. That's true.

[Ken Coleman]

You can't just be the, you know, whatever. You've fashioned yourself to be this hero here, you know, it doesn't make you a bad guy. There's a way to go about it in a way that does not, you know, make life for them really uncomfortable and stressful. But that's something to be thinking about. And I agree. You need to sit with a smartvestor pro tomorrow and begin to plot out your future.

[Dave Ramsey]

It's that time again, folks. Tax season is here. I know some of you would rather bury your head in the sand until April 15th than face your taxes. But here's a better idea. If your tax situation is complicated, get in touch with a Ramsey trusted tax pro today. That way they can take the stress off your shoulders once those tax forms come in and teach you how to keep your tax bill as low as possible. But don't wait. Ramsey trusted pros can book up fast. Go to ramseysolutions.com taxpro to find one who serves your area with excellence. That's ramseysolutions.com taxpro.

[Caller]

Foreign.

[Ken Coleman]

The Ramsey show question of the day is sponsored by Y Refi. If your private student loans are in default and other lenders said no, why refi could be your next step. Why Refi was built for this situation, helping borrowers refinance with a low fixed rate and an affordable payment so you can get back to winning with money. Check out whyrefi.com Ramsey that's the letter y r e f y.com Ramsey. It may not be available in all states.

[Jade Warshaw]

Alrighty. Today's question comes from Ashley in South Dakota. She says Jade. Jade mentioned on a recent show that her husband saves his personal fund money out of their budget. To make larger purchases. What are the logistics of that? How and where is allocated money set aside and tracked? So he knows how much he has in that fund.

[Ken Coleman]

Oh, I love this.

[Jade Warshaw]

Each month. Okay.

[Ken Coleman]

And I know. I know how he does this.

[Jade Warshaw]

You do? You might need to. You might could take this part, Kim.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay. I. I would just go out on the limb and just say, this is what Sam and I do. Okay. This is how it goes in the Warshaw household, you know, don't me. Okay. So on the budget, we have a certain amount of money. Money, fun money. One line is for Jade and one line is for Sam. It's the same amount for each of us. It's there every single month. And it used to be for the longest, if you didn't use it, you'd lose it. It's like, if you don't use it, it's going to roll into savings. It's going to roll. It's going to go somewhere. So you may. I always use mine. But Sam was really bad about using it. And so he finally was like, I'm going to pull this money out and just stack it up. Because he's the 10 type A. He has expensive taste. Ken Coleman.

[Ken Coleman]

I know.

[Jade Warshaw]

And is.

[Ken Coleman]

Believe me.

[Jade Warshaw]

He likes things that one month of fun money can't buy. Okay.

[Ken Coleman]

Yeah.

[Jade Warshaw]

And that's fine. So he stacks it up.

[Ken Coleman]

I'll be.

[Jade Warshaw]

I'mma be dead honest with you. I don't know where he puts it.

[Ken Coleman]

You don't?

[Jade Warshaw]

It's somewhere in the house.

[Ken Coleman]

I totally know where. He does.

[Jade Warshaw]

Where is it?

[Ken Coleman]

It's in a drawer.

[Jade Warshaw]

It's in the sock drawer?

[Ken Coleman]

I think so.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay.

[Ken Coleman]

Don't quote me on the socks, but he and I were hanging out recently. I think this may have how this came up on the show. He pulled off a great surprise for the fan.

[Jade Warshaw]

He did. He did.

[Ken Coleman]

I don't want to reveal stuff I'm not allowed to reveal, but he and I were talking about it. I knew about it ahead of time. And he told me. He was like, this is. This is really an expensive surprise. And I said, dude, you're making memories. And he did.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah, he did.

[Ken Coleman]

And. But it was because he stacks it.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah.

[Ken Coleman]

In that drawer, wherever the drawer is. And then he was like, oh, it's months and months.

[Jade Warshaw]

Months and months. Sam has always been a squirrel. Since I've met him. He, He. He stacks cash. That is what he does. I'm the spender. Well, anyway, yeah, he stacks it up. I'm sure. As far as the question, how does he know how much he wanted to know. Yeah, I think he's just counting it.

[Ken Coleman]

Like, I think he revisits it every once in a while.

[Jade Warshaw]

Uhhuh.

[Ken Coleman]

I bet you he counts it when he adds to it.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah, he probably does.

[Ken Coleman]

He has a ballpark idea.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah, he probably keeps a ballpark idea in his head, and when he feels like he's getting close, he probably counts it. Now, I. Jade, could care less. I'm telling you right now. Now, I don't know how much money he has over there. I don't care. If I went home today and said, I want to know how much money you have. Show me where it is. He would do all of those things. So it's not even a question. And I know, like, he was saving up. He wants to buy a golf cart. He was saving up to do that. Yeah, he saved up and bought the he. And he can buy whatever he wants. He saved up and bought a real life replica ninja Turtle suit from the. The movie Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles back in the 90s lot. Yeah.

[Ken Coleman]

Not a replica, like, legit costume. Legit that an actor would have worn on the movie.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah, it's on display in his office.

[Ken Coleman]

It's unbelievable.

[Jade Warshaw]

It's pretty crazy.

[Ken Coleman]

But what was great is this is a great story because he said to me that he goes, do you think this is insane? And he told me how much the thing was going to cost. And I go, do you have the cash sitting in your drawer? He goes, yeah. And then some. I was like, what are we talking about?

[Jade Warshaw]

This is a done deal.

[Ken Coleman]

Because it was months and months of a line item that stacked up, and then it was also something that made memories. I literally was like, what are we talking about? You have to do it.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yes. Great.

[Ken Coleman]

And he did. So anyway, that's how he does it.

[Jade Warshaw]

That's how he does it.

[Ken Coleman]

It's not real scientific, and I think.

[Jade Warshaw]

I think it is on par with how fun money should be spent. Like, who says it has to be all. It's not a fsa and your personalities are different.

[Ken Coleman]

So if we mean it and we put it in the budget, then it's yours and you spend yours every month.

[Jade Warshaw]

I have a little bit.

[Ken Coleman]

All right, let me ask a question. And you can. You can choose not to answer, but I think America would like to know. Give us an example or two of something you have recently bought with your fun money.

[Jade Warshaw]

Oh, boy.

[Ken Coleman]

Whether you saved or you went all in on something very small and reasonable.

[Jade Warshaw]

I don't remember. The last thing I bought. It was probably some clothing or Shoe item. Like, it's usually clothes or clothes or shoes.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay, well, there it is.

[Jade Warshaw]

But I'm about to buy a hairdryer dryer. It's $500 and I'm signing up for it. Yeah, it's called the Revair. And it's amazing.

[Ken Coleman]

Is this one that you sit under the 1970s.

[Jade Warshaw]

No, it works the opposite. It works like a vacuum. So it sucks your hair in and then it. You don't like, there's no tension. It sucks your hair into the tube. Sorry, what I'm doing with my hands.

[Ken Coleman]

And then it dries inside.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah. And then it comes out dry and straight. And you can set it on settings. So if you have curly hair, it keeps your hair curly. If you have straight, it straightens it out. Does it.

[Ken Coleman]

Does the owner's mouth manual recommend that you do that with another adult present?

[Jade Warshaw]

No.

[Ken Coleman]

Your emergency contact sounds a little risky to me the way you described sucking in your hair. What happens if it like, takes your ear off?

[Jade Warshaw]

No, it's gentle. It's gentle, but that's what I'm saving my fun money for. So the point here is, guys, you need fun money on your budget. Number one, if you're beyond baby step two and three. And it's okay to save it up. Yeah, I think so.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah, I think.

[Jade Warshaw]

Would you. Do you support this message?

[Ken Coleman]

Oh, 100%. And I. I support the fact that you're taking on a somewhat physically risky hair dryer.

[Jade Warshaw]

I promise it's all right.

[Ken Coleman]

I. I'm a little concerned about it. But as long as, again, Sam is around.

[Jade Warshaw]

He's around.

[Ken Coleman]

He'll. He can, he can help out if something goes awry. Melissa is up next in Chicago. Melissa, how come. How can we help?

[Caller]

Hi, I have a question about a student loan debt, but it is not my student loan. My daughter is 27 and she's been graduated for a few years now. And I know her loans are in forbadens. And while she was growing up, I was a single mom. I'm still single, but I had one income and I wasn't able to help her save a lot for college. So I'm in a better position now and I really want to come up with a plan to help her pay the off, but make it motivating for her to do so. So financially, you know, her being an adult, me being a mom, like, where should I go with that? Like offering her money or I just don't know how to quite make her because she hasn't been paying on them because she's a teacher. And she's in the low income category right now, so she's kind of been burying her head in the sand. And I've been listening to you for like four months now. And student loans. Student loans. And I feel like I skipped over that baby step because I wasn't able to. To do it at the time. And now it can help a little bit. So I don't know where I should step, how far I should step into this.

[Jade Warshaw]

Well, I love that you're.

[Caller]

She hasn't asked for any help. Might I add, she's never asked for any help on this.

[Jade Warshaw]

I mean, I love the heart that you would even want to help. I think that's very sweet and very kind. My first order of business, it would be to determine if you're in a position to help. So how old are you?

[Caller]

47.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay. And tell us about your financial snapshot. Do you have, have any debt?

[Caller]

I have no debt.

[Jade Warshaw]

No debt. Great. And emergency fund saved up six months. Love that for you. And you're actively investing the 15%.

[Caller]

Correct.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay. And so, I mean, I'm going to.

[Ken Coleman]

Jump in real quick because we only have about 30 or 40 seconds. The question I have is, is how much income above and beyond your expenses do you have flexibility with every month?

[Caller]

Oh, I have probably 1500.

[Jade Warshaw]

Good.

[Caller]

Flexible.

[Jade Warshaw]

And that's what you would spend or what would you give her?

[Caller]

A lot. I travel.

[Ken Coleman]

Hey, no shame in your game. So tell Jade, what are you thinking? What? Tell Jade what you think you're going to contribute. What you've thought about.

[Caller]

I was thinking, I say, hey, let's get going. Whatever you put down, I will match 50%. I want you to have some skin in the game, but you need to start. She's got.

[Jade Warshaw]

I like that. Like the matching thing because it incentivizes her to make payments as well. My only caveat on this is you must make the payment directly to the debt. We're not going to just give her the money. Okay.

[Caller]

Okay. So get a hold of all of her information to do that directly.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yep. And she makes the payment first and you make the payment second.

[Caller]

O.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay. That way, that way. It's. It's on the up and up.

[Ken Coleman]

Pro tip there. I like that. Pro tip. That is, that's, that's why she's in that chair there. I love that. Hey, Melissa, you're a good mom. Thanks for calling, really. I think Jade gave you some great advice. I would walk that out to a teacher.

[Jade Warshaw]

Hey, guys, what's up? It's Jade and I'm Pumped for the new year, and I hope you are too. But the problem is most people start the new year with a lot of promises and no real plan. You know, know how it is. I'm gonna save money or I'm gonna get my financial act together. But without a plan, you just wing it and hope it works out. Listen, don't play yourself. I want you to win. And our Every Dollar app is the game changer you need. In 15 minutes, EveryDollar helps you build a plan based on where you're at with money right now. And every day, the app coaches you with ways to find extra money so you can beat debt and build wealth faster. Master, it's like having me in your pocket, helping you stay on track all year long. So don't just wish your money works out. You can be the one to actually make it happen this year. Download the EveryDollar Budget app and get started right now for free.

[Ken Coleman]

All right, let's go to Lisa in Las Vegas. Lisa, how can we help?

[Caller]

Hi. Thanks for taking my call today.

[Ken Coleman]

You bet. What's going on?

[Caller]

I have a. So I have a question. I've been. This is. I've been remarried. This is my second marriage. Same for him. We've been married four years, and he still refuses to combine finances no matter what comes at us. He was recently laid off after being at a company for 25 years about four months ago. And after that, he still refuses to combine finances. So I don't know. My question is, how do I move forward despite that decision?

[Jade Warshaw]

So first things first. If he's not making an income, how is he living if he refuses to combine finances?

[Caller]

He's getting unemployment. And recently, I did not know he was gambling. Like. Well, I didn't know this till he won 50, 000 like 30 days ago.

Huh.

So he's living off of that?

[Ken Coleman]

What kind of gambling are we talking about?

[Caller]

He bets, I guess, online for the football game.

[Jade Warshaw]

Sports betting. Man, that's a problem. Okay, that makes this make more sense. When you were first talking Lisa, I had the thought. I thought people who don't. You don't want transparency or generally trying to hide something. Not always, but a lot of times that's. Especially if they're, like, adamant about it.

[Ken Coleman]

Then they gaslight you and say, well, I don't trust you.

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay, so this is a big deal. Any type of. I. I don't know if it's an addiction. I mean, gambling in and of itself, you know, it's. It can be fine to place a bet on something. Obviously, Obviously. But it seems. It seems like there could be more than meets the eye to his gambling simply because it's been used as a front to keep you out of his business financially. So you may be say again.

[Caller]

I feel like he's not gambling like thousands and thousands. How do you know Lucky this time? Based on the income that he makes and he still pays all the bills. So it's about a year ago I was like, you know what? If you're not going to save, leave. I'm done paying the bills.

[Jade Warshaw]

How do you know he's not taking out debt?

[Caller]

I check his credit score.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay, okay. Okay. So there is some transparency. Yeah. Okay. What do you think? You know him better than Ken and I. What do you think is the reason that he doesn't want to combine finances? Is it he got burned in his previous marriage?

[Caller]

Not necessarily. I don't think he. I don't think so. It just didn't work out. He just says he doesn't trust me. And I just want to give you like a little glimpse of what my financial situation looks like. When I came into a marriage, I had just finished building a triplex. And since getting married, I've paid it off. This was pre marriage, so I get income off of that. I work two jobs just because I like it, not because I have to. So it's not like your hard work.

[Jade Warshaw]

Is there anything relationally that would give him reason not to? Like, can you think of. And you don't have to tell us if there is exactly what it is, but is there anything relationally that could cause him to go, I'm not sure if I trust her.

[Caller]

If there is. It's just something that he has to work through, not necessarily something I've given him to hold it against me.

[Jade Warshaw]

But do you know of anything that could be there? Even if it's his to work through, do you know of what that could be? And again, you don't have to say it specifically, but how really?

[Caller]

I mean, I haven't done anything, you know, to make him feel insecure that I'm going to steal all the money that.

[Jade Warshaw]

Does he tell you the reason? He doesn't. If you ask him straight up, hey, what. What is the reason that you don't trust me? What? What is it? What does he tell you?

[Caller]

Because I wouldn't combine finances in the beginning, but I had no money in the beginning, so there was really nothing to do combined.

[Jade Warshaw]

Got it.

[Ken Coleman]

So that was. That leads me to. Did you guys discuss this at all before you got married?

[Caller]

So we Did. And we did open a checking account in the beginning to combine our finances. But again, I wasn't putting any money in it because I had no money when we met.

[Ken Coleman]

But he wanted to combine. He wanted to combine finances when you got married?

[Caller]

Yeah, he was open to it, but little by little, he started putting his check in the. His work money into another account. And little by little, like, that communal account stopped being used. So it's kind of like we went back, but every time I downloaded the.

[Jade Warshaw]

Apps, I want to go back to that because I feel like I heard a couple of different things. First, you said, he doesn't trust me because in the beginning he wanted to combine finances and I didn't. Then it changed to, well, I would have, but I didn't have any money. Then it changed to, well, he stopped putting money in the account. Right. So already. Already that story shifting has me. Has a question mark over my head. Over. Over what's really going on. How are you guys really talking about money? It. How is he perceiving what you're saying in your actions? Because I'll be honest, I'm having a hard time perceiving it myself.

[Ken Coleman]

If you. If he was on the phone with us, the first thing I would have said after hearing all this is, you guys need to go sit with a marriage therapist who is objective. Objective and. And guiding you both at the same time. You guys there, you're like ships in the night a little bit. There's some stuff going on. You both come from previous marriages. You gotta own it and go, we aren't on the same page. And if we don't get on the same page, this is gonna fall apart. So now's a good time. Doesn't sound like things are completely on fire, but yeah, you guys just. You just don't sound like you're doing marriage the way that it's supposed to be done. And that's just like, hey, we're. It doesn't mean we're perfect, but we're trying to be on the same page. And I just don't feel like that's happening. And I think you need an impartial professional to help you get there.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah, I would agree with that. I don't think that this is a numbers or really a money conversation, per se.

[Ken Coleman]

Yeah. Yeah. And again, I think there's a bigger issue here. And I put you on hold because I want Jade to teach to this. This is a good example. Example of why we talk about combining incomes when you get married. It. It just. So let's Go back. This is. It's almost like a refresher. Why do we teach it and how does this call kind of play it out to where we go? This is the potential pitfalls, even though this is not, I don't think, a crisis yet.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah. So, I mean, there's the relational benefit, then there's the actual financial benefit. Right. Financially, it makes sense. Two incomes are better than what, than one. You know, two heads are better than one. You go further, faster together. Right. That's just kind of like the. The headline version of that. I don't think anybody would really argue with that. Now, of course, much of those isms matter with who you married. Right. You know, if you married a ball and chain, you ain't going anywhere fast. Right. So there's part. I understand that I want to know. I want you to know. I know that. So marrying the right person obviously matters to that equation. Uh, then there's the relational side, which is why marrying the right person matters. The relational side, guys, is when you can combine finances. That means that there's a level of trust and a level of transparency in marriage that is needed to function properly. You can't function properly in marriage with someone you don't trust. You can't function properly in marriage with someone you wouldn't be willing to give your passcode to that. You wouldn't be willing to let them see all of your purchases. Because then you have to ask, ask yourself, what? Why am I hiding this? Why am I hiding this specifically from them? Why do they feel the need to hide from me there? It unlocks so many questions within the relationship, which can be a good thing in this case.

[Ken Coleman]

Sure.

[Jade Warshaw]

Because now we're starting to head on the path of.

[Ken Coleman]

Because trust is a two way street.

[Jade Warshaw]

Right.

[Ken Coleman]

And I love how you're pointing this out, because I could be sitting in this situation going, okay, I don't trust you. And then if we dive into it with a therapist, you go, well, what are the reasons you. You don't trust? And it's not something they've actually done. It's something that has been done to you.

[Jade Warshaw]

Possibly. It could be. Possibly, yes.

[Ken Coleman]

It's not always that clean.

[Jade Warshaw]

But can we also talk about. And I want to say this with the caveat. I've only been married one time. Sam War is my only husband.

[Ken Coleman]

Me too.

[Jade Warshaw]

But I do find.

[Ken Coleman]

Well, except for the Sam being my Stacy.

[Jade Warshaw]

Good clarity. I do find that on this show. We do find this a lot in second marriages.

[Ken Coleman]

Yeah.

[Jade Warshaw]

And it's almost like there's. It's almost like there's a framework that we have for first marriages, but we don't carry that framework in, which is the all in. I'm in. I'm with this person. Da, da, da, da. We don't carry that into the second marriage. And it's due to hurt, I'm sure, or I got burned or, man, they really out did a number on me. And I think you have to fight really hard if you're in that second marriage seat to honor the same vows and principles that marriage really is, which is I am giving all of me to all of you, and we are becoming one flesh. That really is what marriage is about at the core.

[Ken Coleman]

I heard John Legend in the background when you were saying, hit me.

[Jade Warshaw]

Hit me, all of me.

[Ken Coleman]

I can't do John Legend. Not even trying.

[Jade Warshaw]

I was ready for it.

[Ken Coleman]

No, it's terrible. I would just butcher it. But great advice. And that's why we teach it. That's as plain of an explanation you're going to get.

[Dave Ramsey]

Hey, guys, Dave Ramsey here. Every day on this show, we help people work through real money problems and figure out what to do next. Now, you can get that same kind of help anytime with Ask Ramsey. Ask your money question and get answers built on Ramsey principles we use on the show. Whether you're making a decision or just want something explained, Ask Ramsey is here to help. It's fast, simple, and free to use. Go to ramseysolutions.com and try Ask Ramsey today. That's ramseysolutions.com.

[Ken Coleman]

All right, our scripture of the day comes from John 3:27. John answered and said, a man can receive nothing except it be given him from heaven. And our quote from Ronald Reagan, The American dream is not that every that every man must be level with every other man. The American dream is that every man must be free to become whatever God intends he should become. All right, our next person up is Zach in Columbus, Ohio. Zach, how can we help?

[Caller]

Hi. How you doing?

[Ken Coleman]

Good. How are you, sir?

[Caller]

Longtime follower. Oh, pretty good. Longtime follower of the baby steps. I have purchased my dream car. I've owned it for about four years.

[Ken Coleman]

Now, which is what I.

[Caller]

So it's a 2017 Dodge Challenger TA edition with a manual transmission.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay.

[Caller]

It's got only 16,000 miles on it. I bought it with 13,000. So I put about 3,004 years treated as a, you know, Sunday driver type thing. Only in the summer. It's the same year that my son was born. So kind of sentimental to me.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay.

[Caller]

My baby step 4, 5, and 6 and I hate debt. I've gone through a baby step two twice now. First time I paid off $140,000. Second time was $113,000. So all I'm left on is my mortgage, and it's driving me crazy.

[Ken Coleman]

How much?

[Caller]

So I. $144,000. I just made a payment of 7,500 on Monday.

[Ken Coleman]

What is your anticipated payoff? Because I know you're thinking, thinking about it.

[Caller]

36 months.

[Jade Warshaw]

Wow. Okay.

[Ken Coleman]

So what's your question?

[Caller]

Well, you know, I bought this car with the intention of keeping it forever. One of my grandkids one day to find it in the barn type thing.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay.

[Caller]

But, you know, I'm contemplating, you know, if I sold this car, I could pay off 21% of my remaining mortgage tomorrow.

[Jade Warshaw]

What's that number?

[Caller]

So I could sell the car wholesale through 31. You can sell tomorrow. If I sold it retail around to another buyer, probably could get about 35 for it.

[Jade Warshaw]

I gotta tell you.

[Ken Coleman]

So.

[Jade Warshaw]

I mean, if you want to sell it, you can. I wouldn't.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay, you got, you got two. No sales here.

[Jade Warshaw]

I mean, you sat. You, you spent way more time explaining the car than the problem, which means you love the, the car and then don't, don't tell us. It's on your child's birthday and all these other things and you want them.

[Ken Coleman]

To find it in the barn one day?

[Jade Warshaw]

Come on.

[Ken Coleman]

I mean, here's the deal. Are you financially responsible? Yes or no?

[Caller]

Yes, sir.

[Ken Coleman]

Are you on track to pay that house off in 36 months?

[Caller]

Yes, sir.

[Ken Coleman]

What are we doing here? Yeah, like, here's the thing. You sell that car. Let's just play this out. Let's out find fast forward. You sell the car, and let's say you split the difference. You get 30,000 for it. Okay. And you put that on the mortgage. How much time is that going to shave off the 36 months?

[Caller]

Eight months.

[Ken Coleman]

Eight months.

[Jade Warshaw]

Oh, so not worth it now.

[Ken Coleman]

What do you think?

[Caller]

Yeah, and that's where I'm stuck. Is. Is.

[Ken Coleman]

No, you're not.

[Caller]

Then I get into thinking of, you know, if I do keep it forever, you know, just the brakes alone is $5,000 on this car.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay, but let's. I want to. I'm going to fight for this for a second because we're talking about eight months or a legacy. Because when you said I want them to find it in the barn. Yeah, we're talking about. That is a long expanse of time. So when you're really saying it's a. It's It's a. It's a question of time here. Which time matters? The eight months that it's going to shave off my debt free journey or the years and years that I'm going to drive this car in the summertime with my kids? The thing that I hope to leave to them. Right. And don't get me wrong, you're gonna do what you want to do and no one's going to be mad at you. I just want to help you see the value of what you. What you were intending to do.

[Ken Coleman]

Zach, I don't think you think you deserve it.

[Caller]

Yeah. And that. That's one of the things with this car. It was. You know, I graduated high school with a 1.8 GPA. I worked my way up from the ground up and go to college. Got married at 19, put my wife through college, finally seemed to have made it and bought my dream car that I never thought I could have and want to pass down to my kids. And they love it. Looks like a Hot Wheels car to them. But at the same time, the security, security of a paid for house, no debt.

[Ken Coleman]

But you've already. You're already on track for that. And if you really needed the money for that car, you could sell it tomorrow. It's an actual. In this case, it is a bit of an asset. Yes or no?

[Caller]

Okay. Yes, sir.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay, so I don't think you think you're good enough. You know how I know it? You said. You said 1.8 GPA. You threw that out there. And it's a little bit of a badge of honor, but it still has got some shame attached to it. Yes or no?

[Caller]

Yes, sir.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay, so you don't think that you're good enough for that car and you think you're being irresponsible by having that car. You threw out the $5,000 breaks. Well, two responses to that. Now I'm going to fight for it.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah.

[Ken Coleman]

Two responses. Number one, you're a guy who's paid off over six figures in debt twice. That guy can put away a little bit of money each month for car repairs. And you're driving that thing so little, it's going to take twice as long to repair those brakes as it would if you were driving it every day. True or false?

[Caller]

That's true. Yes, sir.

[Ken Coleman]

Stop making excuses to buy in to this narrative about yourself. That's incorrect. We're talking to a guy who's very responsible. We're talking to a guy who loves his kids and all. He happens to love a really cool car and I'll bet you don't have many hobbies.

[Caller]

No, I work, I come home and fish occasionally drive the Quarter, and that's about it.

[Ken Coleman]

Then don't soil the car, don't sell the car. We've already ruled. There's no more discussion here. Don't you know, Gavel to the table.

[Jade Warshaw]

You and I have had many discussions today, but this brings up another really good discussion with money. The thing. There's something about money that it does. It scratches the itch of us feeling like, okay, I've done the responsible thing. I've made up for the past. I have. Right. And you're trying to set success there for your family or whatever it may be, be for you. The hard thing with money. And the thing that we have to remember is it is amoral. Like, it's just a tool out there. However, I'm going to say it has a magnetism to it. There's a. There's a quality that it always moves the goal post further and further, and it takes us with it. And it's like the goal post goes there, and like a magnet, we go with it, and then it goes there and we go further. And you have to fight really hard to. To go, well, wait a second. Before, it was a really great win to get debt free. And then we were fine with like, okay, we'll pay out the house. Dah, dah, dah. And then if you don't fight that, it pulls the joy of you living your life because it pulls the goalpost a little bit further. And you're like, ah, I got to do that now. And, oh, I got to do. And you're stealing your own joy from yourself because you're letting that magnet pull you further. And you have to. You just have to be careful. Don't get. I'm all for success. I'm all for. I am a very. I love achieving. So I'm not taking that away from anybody. But you just have to be careful.

[Ken Coleman]

Yeah, I agree. And again, you talk a lot about in your last book, the bestseller, the Emotions of Money, and we can't forget that those emotions are based on experiences in our lives around money. So we didn't unpack this with Zach, but I'll guarantee you the same patterns where he talked about. I was a 1.8 GPA. I got married at 19. Here's what I heard. I did things the untraditional way. I did things in a way that no one recommends. Everybody says go to college. So therefore, he wouldn't have gotten married. Maybe he was playing out a narrative that said he was proud of himself and rightfully so.

[Jade Warshaw]

But he did everything the hard way.

[Ken Coleman]

Yeah. And not the way that you're supposed to.

[Jade Warshaw]

Right, right.

[Ken Coleman]

And so then you also go, okay, so there's those emotions which I touched on. But what we don't know is what kind of background he had. What was environment like growing up in his house around money? How did people view money? Did his dad, did he hear his dad go, we'll never own a nice car? And so is there a level of. And I don't know, I'm projecting. But that's where you talk a lot about, about the emotions around money. And we've got to master those.

[Jade Warshaw]

That's right. Yeah. We know this. Money touches everything, every area of life. And because of that, when we teach something like the baby steps or even a really simple thing of saying, hey, for a little while, you're going to sacrifice short term for a long term gain. Right. You might tell somebody to sell the car. I might tell somebody to, you know, stop getting your nails done. And it's never just that, it's. How could you tell me? How could you tell me to sell my car? Don't you know that when I grew up, you know, we only had one car and I had to walk to school and I didn't have gloves because I my parents. Right. And we spin out to whatever we remember. So just remember that money is very emotional.

[Ken Coleman]

By the way, she goes into great detail in her best selling book. What no one tells you about money can get it wherever books are sold. And remember this folks, there's ultimately only one way to financial peace and that's to walk daily with the prince of peace, Christ Jesus.

[Caller]

Sa.