Stop Letting Dumb Decisions Control Your Financial Future

Summary

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The Ramsey Show

Episode: Stop Letting Dumb Decisions Control Your Financial Future

Date: March 18, 2026

Hosts: Dave Ramsey, Dr. John DeLoney
Podcast Network: Ramsey Network

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Episode Overview

In this hard-hitting, insightful episode, Dave Ramsey and Dr. John DeLoney take calls from listeners struggling with financial mistakes and major life decisions. The hosts use their signature blend of tough love, practical advice, and relatable humor to address the theme of the day: “Stop letting dumb decisions control your financial future.” Across calls ranging from marital money drama and mounting debt to career transitions and inheritance woes, Dave and John remind listeners that no mistake is permanent and with the right plan and mindset, anyone can build wealth and take control.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Marital Money Problems and A Lack of Unity

• Caller Ann’s Story (00:51–08:35):
  • Ann describes a decade of marriage with separate finances, following advice from her grandmother to always keep control of her own money.
  • Recently discovered her disabled husband has an Amex with an $18,000 balance at 30% interest — previously hidden.
  • She finds out her husband makes more income than she thought from his pension.
• Dave & John’s Take:
  • Dave emphasizes: "You lost all the right to vote on his money when you said, 'I'm not going to vote on your money.'" (02:24)
  • John points out: "You have to change your language ... you have to change it to we." (05:21)
  • Solution: The pair encourage Ann to drop blame, restart the marriage financially, and work together as a team. "The two of us are going to become one, like the preacher says... and he gets a vote and you get a vote." (06:17–06:50)

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2. Paying Down Debt vs. Investing

• Caller Susanna (11:01–17:23):

  • Married less than a year, household income $11,500/month, with $85k in debt (mostly car loan and student loans).
  • Debates continuing investments vs. paying off debt.

• Dave’s Guidance (13:20–14:39):

  • "The data says stop all investing temporarily and pay off the $85,000 as fast as you possibly can."
  • Highlights that their most powerful wealth-building tool is their income, which is being "sucked out" by the debt.
  • Emotional impact of debt is discussed: "Taking that stuff off your risk profile lets you sleep, man. It just changes the temperature and the tension in your home." (16:00 – John)

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3. Should I Let Family Be My Bank?

• Caller Joy (17:26–20:00):
  • Her dad offers to finance her upcoming home purchase instead of her taking a bank loan.
• Dave & John’s Advice:
  • Immediate “Don’t do it!” — borrowing money from family, especially for big life purchases, almost always ends with relational strain.
  • Dave: "When you eat Thanksgiving dinner with your master, even if he's a nice master, it still tastes different." (18:27)
  • Encourages clear boundaries, suggesting only to accept a large family gift, not a loan.

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4. Workplace Morality and Personal Values

• Caller Doug (22:06–27:39):
  • Works part-time in a home improvement store and is pressured to sign up customers for credit cards and HELOCs, conflicting with his values as he tries to get out of debt.
• Advice:
  • Dave: “If you work for someone, they tell you, 'this is your job.' You have to do the job or you don't get to work there.” (25:07)
  • If it violates your ethics, seek other employment rather than creating conflict or harboring resentment.
  • John: “Those imaginary conversations are a complete and utter waste of your time … commit to not having imaginary conversations. Either have it or don’t.” (26:39)

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5. Massive Student Debt and Life Priorities

• Caller Tara (27:43–31:00):
  • 29-year-old veterinarian with $301k in student loans, 5.7% interest, wants advice about debt vs. launching a business vs. starting family.
• Dave:
  • Urges caller to recognize her “vet” commitment and focus on wiping out the debt before considering business-ownership or reducing work to have kids.
  • “You sacrificed a lot of your future in $300,000 to get to be a DVM. And so I want to quit and stay home and raise babies. You gave that up when you signed up for 300k ... Now you gotta get this stinking mess cleaned up.” (29:16–30:26)

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6. Smart Home Buying in Your Twenties

• Caller Matthew (34:05–39:09):
  • 27, saved $120,000, wants to buy a sensible, smaller first home for $250–300k range.
• Dave’s Principle:
  • "He with the most options and patience, wins. ... Options mean you look at a lot of properties.” (35:20)
  • Foreclosures are only a deal if they’re actually priced below market after repairs; always get inspections.

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7. Dealing With Regret After Financial Upheaval

• Caller John (39:31–42:49):
  • Self-employed musician, recently purchased first home, now anxious, feels over-leveraged after unexpected car accident and expenses.
• Ramsey Reframe:
  • "The math says the $1500 out of $4000 shouldn’t cause you stress ... your perception of the house is causing stress." (42:29)
  • Emphasizes sticking with the plan, “facts are your friends.”

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8. Quick-Fire: Ethics & Integrity Calls

Settling Massive Old Car Debt After Injury Settlement (44:06–51:07)

• 21-year-old caller, $70k car debt, $250k settlement after bizarre injury from 3D-printed firearm.
• Dave: “When you get your $250k, you write a check and pay the people you owe because you screwed them.” (48:02)
• John on integrity: “If you want to become a wealthy person that changes your family tree ... you have to become a person of extreme integrity.” (49:36)

Living Together, Splitting Expenses, and Avoiding Commitment (54:16–58:52)

• Marie, 62, debates with 51-year-old boyfriend (not married) about whether he should pay part of her household bills, as he stays there regularly.
• Dave/John: Suggest she may be seeking emotional connection and commitment, disguised as a financial debate. Outcome: “If you’re going to stay in this relationship, I think he wins the argument.” (58:35)

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9. Financial Clean-Up & Systems Over Spending

Young Adult Trapped by Poor Habits (66:18–71:33)

• Evelyn, 24, earns $3–4k/month, lives at home, puts everything on credit card, stuck in paycheck-to-paycheck cycle, duplex rental not making money.
• Dave: “I think you have a systems problem.” (68:57)
• Suggests selling property, cutting up the credit card, budgeting with EveryDollar, and picking up a second job for fast progress.

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10. Debt Settlement, Credit Reports, and Ethics (71:46–74:21)

• Hannah asks how long charge-offs stay on credit reports.
• Dave: “Seven years from date of last activity. Spoiler: That doesn't matter ... They still will sue you.”
• Takes opportunity to urge people to clean up their debts, not just wait them out.

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11. Work, Relocation, and Being Upfront With Future Employers

• Caller Corey (75:35–81:40):
  • Worried about taking a new job knowing possible relocation in 6–12 months.
• Ethical Lens:
  • “Treat other people like you’d want to be treated.” (76:41)
  • John: “If you’re a great social worker, there will be schools lining up for you. ... Be honest, but also tell the whole story.” (81:10)

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12. Other Notable Calls & Wisdom Nuggets

• How much to spend on an engagement ring? — “No more than a month’s income. The jewelry store tells you three months income, but they sell jewelry.” (82:21–84:40)
• Inheriting a rental property as executor — “Your job is to execute the will, not drama. Make sure the will is clear so there’s no family squabble afterward.” (85:52–93:06)
• Work optional after selling business and real estate (122:03–126:14): "Arithmetic says you have enough, but you need a sense of purpose. Your spirit is not work-optional."
• Baby Steps Millionaire story—Scott: “Stay employed, pay yourself first, stay invested.” (109:27)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Marital Unity:

  • “You gotta change your language. I, I, I, he he he, you have to change it to we.” — John DeLoney (05:21)
  • "The two of us are going to become one, like the preacher says. And now you are one." — Dave Ramsey (06:17)

• Financial Peace and Stress:

  • “Taking that stuff off your risk profile lets you sleep, man. It just changes the temperature and the tension in your home.” — John DeLoney (16:00)

• Family Loans:

  • “When you eat Thanksgiving dinner with your master, even if he's a nice master, it still tastes different.” — Dave Ramsey (18:27)

• On Integrity:

  • “If you want to become a wealthy person ... you have to become a person of extreme integrity. Quit doing crap under the table.” — Dave Ramsey (49:36)

• Dealing with Inheritance Drama:

  • “Your job is not to execute drama. Your job is to execute his wishes in the will.” – Dave Ramsey (89:23)

• Wealth-Building Fundamentals:

  • “Keep investing and keep employed. Pay yourself first.” — Scott, Baby Steps Millionaire (109:27)
  • “Compound interest, self discipline, living on less than you make ... actually freaking works.” — Dave Ramsey (114:31)

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Timestamps: Important Segments

• Marital Financial Blunders & Rebuilding as a Team: 00:51–08:35
• Debt vs. Investing Strategies: 11:01–17:23
• Should My Dad Be My Bank?: 17:26–20:00
• Values Clash at Work: 22:06–27:39
• $301k Student Loans, Business Ownership vs. Kids: 27:43–31:00
• First-Time Home Buying (Gen Z Success): 34:05–39:09
• Homeownership Regrets & Anxiety: 39:31–42:49
• Morality of Debt Settlement After Injury Windfall: 44:06–51:07
• Long-Term Unmarried Couples & Expenses: 54:16–58:52
• Basic Budgeting/Systems for Young Adults: 66:18–71:33
• Credit Charge-Offs, Ethics, and Settlement: 71:46–74:21
• Moral Dilemma: Changing Jobs Before Moving: 75:35–81:40
• How Much for the Engagement Ring?: 82:05–84:40
• Inheritance, Executorship, and Setting Up the Will: 85:52–93:06
• Baby Steps Millionaire Wisdom: 107:33–114:31
• Work Optional vs. Purposeful Living: 122:03–126:14

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Tone and Style

• Direct, no-nonsense, and at times irreverent (“Better than I deserve,” “Normal is broke and common sense is weird”)
• Offers encouragement but never coddles; humor and “snark” soften blunt truths
• Emphasizes personal responsibility, unity (especially in marriage), and integrity

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Final Takeaway

The Ramsey Show’s March 18, 2026 episode is a masterclass in financial reality checks. Through pointed advice and illustrative caller stories, Dave and Dr. John drive home that “dumb” past decisions don’t have to dictate your future—if you face them with honesty, teamwork, and a plan. Financial peace isn’t just about dollars; it’s about character, unity, and intentionality.

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Transcript

[Dave Ramsey]

Brought to you by the EveryDollar app. Start budgeting for free today. Normal is broke and common sense is weird. So we're here to help you transform your life. From the Ramsey Network and the Fair Winds Credit Union Studio, this is the Ramsey Show. I'm Dave Ramsey. Your host, Dr. John DeLoney, host of the Dr. John DeLoney show and number one bestselling author Ramsey personality, is my co host. The Phone number is 888-25-5225. Call is free. And some say the advice is worth exactly what you pay for it. Ann is with us in Nashville. Hi, Ann, how are you?

[Caller]

Hi. How are you? I'm good. How are you?

[Dave Ramsey]

Better than I deserve. What's up?

[Caller]

So I am calling today because essentially, my husband and I have been married 10 years in that 10 years we've never had shared. Essentially. When I was graduating college, my grandmother on her deathbed told me, don't ever let a man control your money. You make it, you control it. And I kind of took that to heart because she never left a bad marriage because she didn't have money to do so. So we're 10 years in, and now I'm. I feel completely hoodwinked because my husband has been using the money that he has, like using cash. I don't know where the cash is going, but he's been apparently funding his entire life on an Amex card that I just found out has an $18,000 balance at a 30% interest rate. And when I confronted him about it, I told him he needed to cancel the card, that we were going to be eating rice and beans because this was absolutely unacceptable. But he told me he was going to take care of it. He was going to make a budget. He didn't want me talking to him like that, didn't want me talking to him like he was a child. So, yeah.

[Dave Ramsey]

I mean, you suddenly decided you wanted to interfere in his money.

[John DeLoney]

Yeah.

[Dave Ramsey]

After 10 years of telling him you wanted nothing to do with him, no wonder he pissed.

[Caller]

Well, I mean, I'm over here like.

[Dave Ramsey]

Well, I know, but you lost all the right to vote on his money when you said, I'm not going to vote on your money.

[John DeLoney]

You decided, out of the gate, I'm going to row in my boat, you row in yours. And now you're mad at the direction he's rowing.

[Caller]

Yeah, but my money's paying for our entire life, so.

[Dave Ramsey]

Well, that's not a new thing.

[Caller]

No. So this is the other thing. So he is disabled, and he gets this pension, and for years, I Thought this pension was a pittance. Like I literally was like, okay, he pays like the utilities and whatever. Well, I found out too, this pension is not a pittance. Like apparently, you know, because I'm like paying for all of our insurance premiums, like putting money in a 403B, putting money into our kids college savings plans, you know, I insurance, dental insurance for everyone. He brings home more money than I do now.

[John DeLoney]

Okay, okay, hold on. You're, why are you blaming him? This is the arrangement y' all co created at your direction based on bad advice from your grandma. You're blaming him that he makes a bunch of money and you didn't know about it.

[Caller]

Okay.

[John DeLoney]

You get what I'm saying? Well, did you ever ask him?

[Caller]

I did so several times. Like I'd asked him and several times I was like, hey, this is what's going on. This is how I'm budgeting things. This is what's going on with everything. And I'd be like, do you want to go ahead and start working together? And he would be like, well, I don't know how to change my direct deposit or I don't know how to do online banking or it would always be some reason. But then I was just non confrontational. So I never just, you know, try to pig him down on it.

[John DeLoney]

Well, but also he has a very real lived experience that things are going to be done your way, the way you want them, at your direction. You get what I'm saying? There's a difference between, hey, look at all the stuff I'm having to pay for. Do you want to start combining money and do it my way and him going, no? Or are you saying, hey, I set us out on a, on a, on a bad course. I thought the greatest way to keep myself safe was to keep myself disconnected from my spouse. And I was wrong. And I want a chance to rebuild this thing from the ground up. Will you be in this with me? And that means we're going to combine everything, including our fears, our shame, our embarrassments and our money. And we got to be united in this thing. So you see how one of those is an accusation and one of those is a demand and one of those is an invitation.

[Caller]

Yeah, right.

But now I'm left with like, you know, I've created, you know, this budget. I have sinking funds.

[John DeLoney]

I have, I know, but listen, you got to change your language. I, I, I, he he he, you have to change it to we.

[Caller]

So okay, you know what I'm saying? I do, but now we have this like $18,000 credit card with a 30% interest rate.

[Dave Ramsey]

That's a cost of doing business poorly.

[John DeLoney]

Yeah.

[Caller]

Yes. So what do I do? How would I tell him?

[Dave Ramsey]

Send the bill to. She caused it.

[John DeLoney]

We have to decide that we are going to do money differently. We're going to be connected, and we are both going to get this debt paid off, and we are going to decide how we spend money. And I'm going to stop lecturing you and being mad at you. And also, I'm going to tell you

[Dave Ramsey]

he didn't do anything wrong, by the way.

[John DeLoney]

He's just doing what y' all arranged together.

[Dave Ramsey]

He did nothing wrong in this thing. He did exactly what you told him to do. He went over there and lived his life. And then you're bitching about how he lived it. You can't. You don't get it both ways. Yeah.

[John DeLoney]

You gotta come back together.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah. So the two of you sit down, start fresh, and go, okay, I want to do over. The two of us are going to become one, like the preacher says. And now you are one. And we're going to put all of our money in the middle of the table. And I'm not going to gripe at you about the 18,000. We're going to cut up the Amex card. And together we're going to decide what we are going to spend on fun, what we are going to spend on life, what we are going to put in the kids. 529, how we are going to pay the insurance bill. And we, together, are putting all of our money. And he gets a vote. And you get a vote on how this budget looks.

[John DeLoney]

And if he says no, I'm not. I don't know, I'm not going to fix my direct deposit. Then you all have a much bigger issue in your marriage than just doing money separately. You get what I'm saying?

[Caller]

I guess I do. Because it just. I guess it feels kind of like dishonest that he's let me believe for 10 years that he's got this, like, pittance.

[Dave Ramsey]

I don't think so. Maybe you are working really hard to make him a bad guy in this, and I want you to reframe that because it's your fault. I really. I mean, that'll be good for your marriage. I gotta tell you, I don't want to change my deposit because my wife thinks I've been lying to her for 10 years. And I don't think my vote's gonna count in this budget meeting. I'll bet you he doesn't want to change the deposit, then, yeah, but I wouldn't either. Wouldn't either, so.

[John DeLoney]

And if you've been saying, hey, I need some help, and he says, I don't have any money, and he's been lying to you, that's one thing.

[Dave Ramsey]

That's a different issue.

[John DeLoney]

It doesn't sound like that's been happening.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah, might have. But even then, you know, he certainly didn't come full forward and go, look, I make more than you on my disability check. He didn't do that and he should have. I don't disagree with that part, but I think you guys get the opportunity to start over. But the only way this guy's going to join in with you is if he doesn't have to acquiesce and lose all power because you shame him into it. That's not going to work.

[John DeLoney]

It has to be an invitation.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yep. Not going to work.

[John DeLoney]

Almost all invitations start with I statements. I mess this up. I want to do this different. I want us to be together. Will you join me in this? And it's going to take us changing the way we do everything.

[Dave Ramsey]

And you get a vote, and I get a vote, and we're going to agree like two grownups together. I'm not your mama. And I'm not going to bitch at you about this anymore.

[Caller]

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[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

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[Dave Ramsey]

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[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

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[Dave Ramsey]

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[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

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[Dave Ramsey]

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[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

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[Dave Ramsey]

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[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

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[Dave Ramsey]

Protect yourself, protect your income, protect your family. Susanna's in West Palm Beach, Florida. Hi, Susanna, how are you?

[Caller]

Hi. I'm doing well, Dave. Thanks for asking. And thanks for taking my call. How are you?

[Dave Ramsey]

Better than I deserve. How can I help?

[Caller]

Hi. So, yeah, me and my husband, we just recently got married a little under a year ago.

We're going on a year.

I am 29. He's 29 as well. We're the same age, and we just have decision. Financial fatigue from trying to decide whether we should continue to invest. I'm kind of going on the route of investing still or pay off our debt. So my husband and I, we make about 11,500amonth right now, which will be our highest income.

[Dave Ramsey]

Congratulations.

[Caller]

This is great. Thank you.

[Dave Ramsey]

How much debt do you have?

[Caller]

So we have 85,000 in debt.

[Dave Ramsey]

On what?

[Caller]

So I have 24,000 on my car. We just paid off his car, which was 26,000. We just did that last month.

[Dave Ramsey]

Very good.

[Caller]

Yeah, so that was a huge lift. So now we're trying to say, like, do we continue? And then I have 61,000 in student loans, unfortunately.

[Dave Ramsey]

Gotcha. Okay. And you're 29 years old. All right, so let's pan out a little bit from. Instead of looking at the actual situation right there in front of you and ask, what is the goal with your money? Okay. Because it'll affect what you should do. Okay. So in other words, goal number one could be, I'm going to live my life wide open right now. I'm going on six cruises a year. I'm going to do whatever I want to do. I'll make $11,000. That's a goal. And if that's your goal, it's a different answer. If your goal is, I want to live a good, solid life, I'm willing to be sacrificial for a short period of time to increase the speed at which we build wealth, which will allow us to be outrageously generous and do anything we want to do, which is the goal. We Usually are aligning people to, okay, so what's the fastest way to become wealthy? In other words, so that I can live the life I want to live and change my family tree and be outrageously generous. So what's the fastest way to become wealthy? If that's the goal, then I can help you.

[Caller]

Yes, yes, that would be the goal.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay, then the data says stop all investing temporarily and pay off the 85,000 as fast as you possibly can. And here's why. Okay, here's the data says this. We studied 10,167 millionaires. The largest study of millionaires ever done. What we found was that they increased the speed at which their net worth went up. Their 401ks got fully funded, they jammed them up and they got their home paid off when they got rid of their debt. Because your most powerful wealth building tool is your income. And right now the bone marrow is being sucked out of your income with $85,000 worth of bull crap. And so when you get rid of that, it increases the velocity of your wealth building. That's what the data tells us from studying millionaires. And actually the math will tell you that too. When you think about, okay, all those payments on that 85,000, what if we just put that into an investment? Oh, that's $5 million in five years or 10 years or 20 years or whatever it is. Right. And so it turns, you can see those payments are mathematically the arithmetic is sucking the marrow out of your investments. And so you're trying to do some investing because you want to build. We meanwhile, you're limping along in mediocrity because a large portion of your $11,000 is going to past stupidity.

[Caller]

Yes, very true.

Yeah.

[Dave Ramsey]

And that's normal. I mean, that's normal. So what we have found is that with your income, you'll be debt free in about 18 months. If you go crazy for a short period of time and say, all right, we're not going out to eat, we're going to sell so much stuff, the kids think they're next. We're not going on vacation, we're going to clear the stinking. Because it's between me and winning.

[Caller]

Okay. I definitely see holding perspective on it. Sacrificing now will get us to the long term. Well, later on

[Dave Ramsey]

you had the right goal. The only question is, what's the most effective path to that goal? Right. And that's what we've come down to. We figured that from 30 years of sitting in the seat answering these questions and helping people become Millionaires. Tens of thousands of them. And Sharon and I did. And the Ramsey personalities did. And I talked to two of my leaders downstairs a while ago. They just. Both of them paid off their house in the last three weeks. And both of them said as soon as we paid off our house, that put us at the millionaire, you know, the millionaire net worth. And then. And then boom. With no stinking house payments. Susanna put that in a calculator.

[John DeLoney]

Yeah.

[Dave Ramsey]

Oh, my gosh. Well, you put a house payment, a calculator, and you go, hey, what's that turn into in 20 years? It's not a million. It's like 10 million.

[John DeLoney]

Well, and Dave, I think there's. For me personally, in my house, there's a whole other side of this equation, which is as the news gets crazy, as the world gets crazy, knowing that like the. The banks don't care, you signed up to make a payment every month. This student loan payment is due. This car payment is due. This mortgage payment is due. It doesn't matter if you lose your job, that payment still do. It doesn't matter if your hours get cut, that payments still do. Taking that stuff off your risk profile lets you sleep, man. It just changes the temperature and the tension in your home. And that to me is worth as much as my, like my overall net worth portfolio is just having peace in my.

[Dave Ramsey]

What's weird is it's not only just that. That then causes you to make different decisions that are wiser and that accelerates your wealth.

[John DeLoney]

Yes, that.

[Dave Ramsey]

Because you're coming from peace. Yes, from.

[Caller]

We've all.

[John DeLoney]

We've all been approached by a salesman that is happy to help us and wants us to win. And we've also been approached by a salesman who we can already. We know, oh, you need this sale.

[Caller]

Right?

[John DeLoney]

Those are. That level of desperation is just different. And you are more successful. I want to work with that guy that wants to help me out, not the one that needs me to overspend. Right. So anyway, there's the money part, but, man, there's that peace part.

[Dave Ramsey]

And they just do work together.

[John DeLoney]

They work so well together.

[Dave Ramsey]

Really cool. So, hey, thanks for calling. Joy's in Orlando. Hey, Joy. What's up?

[Caller]

Good. How are you? I was wondering. My dad is offering to be a bank as I'm looking for homes. And I'm wondering if that's okay to take him up on that offer or if I should just.

[John DeLoney]

Run, Joy, run.

[Dave Ramsey]

Your dad is sweet.

[John DeLoney]

He's awesome.

[Dave Ramsey]

He's sweet, but don't do it. Here's why. Here's why.

[Caller]

That's what I thought. But I thought I should ask.

[Dave Ramsey]

The old joke is, if you loan your brother in law a hundred dollars and he never speaks to you again, was it worth it? So the borrower is slave to the lender. And when you owe someone money, even someone as sweet as your dad, and your dad's a really nice guy. I mean, because jerks don't offer to give their daughter, like, bank money, Right? So loan their daughter bank money. But when you eat Thanksgiving dinner with your master, even if he's a nice master, it still tastes different.

[Caller]

Yeah, you're right.

[Dave Ramsey]

And. And you're looking over your shoulder, wondering if he's judging the vacation you're taking while you owe him money.

[John DeLoney]

Are you married, Joy?

[Caller]

I'm not.

[John DeLoney]

Okay.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah.

[John DeLoney]

I promise. If you start dating somebody or you go get married and you still are in this arrangement, that's going to be real weird between the two of them. Here's what I would do. I would tell my dad, I would take him out for a breakfast somewhere, not super expensive, but kind of nice. And I would tell him, thank you so much, but I want you to always just be my dad.

[Caller]

Aw.

[John DeLoney]

You get what I'm saying? I want to preserve dad. I want to preserve that relationship. I don't ever want it to be weird. Let me do banking with banks. I want you to always just be my dad.

[Dave Ramsey]

And if he decides to gift you $100,000 instead of loaning it to you, you can take it.

[John DeLoney]

Take it all day long. Take it all day long.

[Caller]

That's so fun.

[Dave Ramsey]

I didn't say. I didn't say you bring it up. I said if he decides.

[John DeLoney]

I mean, you might want to bring it up.

[Dave Ramsey]

No, that.

[Caller]

That.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah. Be careful. This is the. This ends up poorly. So when I went broke and lost everything, Sharon's dad loaned us money. And Sharon's dad, he's 97 now. He's the nicest man I've never known. He is the sweetest, kindest, gentlest guy. He never said an unkind word. And I got that payback really, really fast. And it drove me bonkers.

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Dave Ramsey]

I couldn't stand it. And Sharon's like, well, it's no big deal. It's just my dad.

[John DeLoney]

The shadow of her dislike was over your house.

[Caller]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Dave Ramsey]

In the midst of having gone broke, lost everything, bankrupted and shamed, now her

[John DeLoney]

daddy has to come bail you money,

[Dave Ramsey]

and I have to eat Thanksgiving dinner. There's. And he never said a stinking word. None of that's on him, it's all on me. But it proved to me that point. The borrower is slave to the lender.

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[Dave Ramsey]

Doug is in Philadelphia. Hi, Doug, how are you?

[Caller]

Good, how are you, sir? Thank you so much for having me on the show.

[Dave Ramsey]

Sure. How can we help?

[Caller]

So I. Excuse me. I am in baby step two of my financial journey and I got a part time job, I work a full time job, but I got a part time job at a big box home improvement store. And when I started there, you know, credit cards were always a thing. I have never signed anybody up for one. I refuse to do it. I have no issue. I will never do it. And it was really never a big deal. When they would ask, you know, I tell them nobody wants to already has one, but they've really been recently pushing. Like every day I go in, hey, you haven't signed anybody up for a credit card. Hey, you haven't signed anybody up for a credit card. And now they're starting to offer helocs. And they're telling me they want me to start pushing these helocs. And my conundrum is, is do I only got about 9 to 10 months left there before I've completed my goals and I'm actually out of baby step three? Do I just continue to play that game and say, oh yeah, it's fine, or do I say sit down with my manager and say, hey, here are My values here are my convictions, and I will not push these products onto people when I myself am here trying to get out of debt.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah, well, if you do that, you're gonna get fired.

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Dave Ramsey]

So an easier method would be just quit. Be easier. Be easier on everybody. Or you can just ride it out for nine months and, you know, but. But it's the business that they're in, and it's. They have now said, okay, you work for us. Your job is to help someone find the bolt, the screw, the lock, and to sign them up for a credit card. That's your job. And if you're not doing that, you're not doing your job. That's what they're saying, right?

[Caller]

Yes. Yes.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah. And so. And you don't want to do that. And so I honestly, I think you probably get another job that doesn't require that. That pays about the same, don't you?

[Caller]

Yeah, Yeah, I enjoy helping. I have a maintenance background, so I really enjoy helping customers figure out their problems and helping them with their DIY projects and. Yeah, and I enjoy that. Doing that aspect of it. And, like, at first, I never had a problem. It was never really pushed, the whole credit card thing. But now it's almost. It's every day I walk in, and it's just. I want to say to him, like, I'm not doing that. I will help customers get their product. I'll help them with their product, their problems, and help them solve them and fix it, but I'm not pushing the credit card. And I told my wife, I said,

[Dave Ramsey]

I understand the moral aspect of it, but the bottom line is they own the company. And they said, this is your job, and you don't want to do the job.

[Caller]

Yes, I guess, yeah, you're right.

[Dave Ramsey]

It shouldn't be the job. The job ought to be what you're talking about, helping people with their DIY project, and it ought to be fun to do. I have a friend that, back during COVID was bored, and he went to work in one of those stores, and the thing that drove him crazy was they had a policy that no matter what happens, if someone wants to return something, you have to take it back. And he had a guy come in that had had a lawnmower for two years, mowing his grass with it, and brought it back, said, I don't like it, and he's supposed to give him a full credit. And he goes, that's immoral. I'm not doing that. And they go, yeah, you are. And he goes, no, that's wrong. That guy's ripping us off. We shouldn't do that. And they go, no, that's our policy. We take it back. No what? No matter how absurd. And they fired him because he wouldn't take the lawnmower. He said, I'm not going to do it. And they're like, well, that's what your job is. You work for us. Well, that's true. If you work for someone, they tell you, this is your job. You have to do the job or you don't get to work there. I mean, that's a simple thing. Right? So I don't disagree with the angst that is created by you here. I honestly, if I were in your shoes, I'd go look for something else. If you want to sit down with your supervisor and say, hey, listen, I don't want to cause a stink. I don't want to get fired. And, and I'm not going to make some big moralistic speech here, but I'm here to help people with their DIY stuff and I really enjoy that. And I'm really not going to be doing this credit card thing if you think I should quit. If that's the case, you tell me. You could do that.

[Caller]

Okay.

[John DeLoney]

And Doug, can I, can I pass something along to you? And this is the pot talking to the kettle here.

[Caller]

Yeah, absolutely.

[John DeLoney]

How often do you spend having imaginary conversations with your boss and your owners?

[Caller]

I've had a couple.

[John DeLoney]

You've had a bunch where you, you're gonna sit them down, you're gonna tell them, they're gonna be like, oh, that's right, that's what's up. And you always have the mic drop moment at the end and it feels so good. Let me tell you this, it's not

[Dave Ramsey]

gonna work that way.

[John DeLoney]

Those imaginary conversations are a complete and utter waste of your time. In fact, they're not even benign. They detract energy that you could be spending on loving your wife well, loving your kids well. And being at. And so commit to not having imaginary conversations. Either have it or don't. And then seek like Dave's like, man, you're, you're working a part time job. Go find another part time job, man, and then sail off into the sunset. I'm not going to give you my character and my integrity and extra energy that could go to my family. I'm just not going to do it.

[Dave Ramsey]

Tara is in Birmingham. Hey, Tara, what's up?

[Caller]

Hi. I am a 29 year old single veterinarian. I am three years out from school and having pre marriage discussions with my boyfriend. Neither have debt. He owns his house. My student loans are our big discussion point. I have 301,000 in student loans with a 57% average interest. I.

[Dave Ramsey]

No, no, no, no, no. Stop, stop, stop, stop. You said 57%.

[John DeLoney]

5.7.

[Caller]

5.7.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah. Okay.

[John DeLoney]

Dang, Gina.

[Dave Ramsey]

That's gonna be a little different. Okay?

[Caller]

Sorry for the federal government.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah.

[Caller]

And I made 97,000 a year. So I was planning on student loan forgiveness, but I don't trust that it's going to stay around. And we're looking at potentially having kids before then. And I don't know that I will stay full time. I'd rather set aside money for my own small business. But I have such a large sum of student loans. I'm not sure what I should prioritize. Paying it off before kids come or setting aside money for my own business so I can have that option when kids come. And

[Dave Ramsey]

here's the thing. I know a lot of veterinarians. We work with a lot of them in entree leadership. And I've got several personal friends that were veterinarians. And you're always very, very intelligent people because, you know, a medical doctor only has to learn one body system. You have to learn multiple species body systems. And so I know that you're a bright person or you wouldn't be a dvm. Okay? And you worked really, really hard to get to be a DVM. And you sacrificed a lot of your future in $300,000 to get to be a DVM. And so I want to quit and stay home and raise babies. You gave that up when you signed up for 300k until you get the 300k cleared. You're a vet. You're a vet. You signed up to be a vet, kiddo. Now you got to go be a vet and you gotta get this stinking mess cleaned up.

[Caller]

That's why I want to have my business.

[Dave Ramsey]

No, you don't. You don't have the money to do a business. You're broke. Yeah. You're $300,000 in debt. You make 97 a year, and you can make 150 a year by just picking up side gigs, working emergency medicine and some of the other stuff. And you need to go to go to work. You need to work 247 all the time and get this out of your life. Now if you guys get married and you can live on his income and it sounds like he's very financially responsible, well, if you're making 100, you can clean up 300 pretty quick. Can't you make it 150? You can clean it up even quicker.

[John DeLoney]

And if he throws in, if he's got money to add that, when y' all combine income, that's even faster.

[Dave Ramsey]

Before you do anything, before we talk about I want to quit and stay home, you don't start talking about starting a business and I want to quit and stay home in the same sentence. Those are incongruent. So you got to decide which you is going to be. But for now, eight years ago, you decided you were going to be a vet. $300,000 worth of whole worth. And so now you got to clean up your mess. When you're drowning in credit card debt and collectors start threatening lawsuits, a rep from some call center debt relief company can't protect you. A lot of so called debt relief programs leave people wondering, am I actually protected if I get sued? When all you've got is a legal plan added on as an upsell, of course you feel stuck. But Guardian isn't another debt relief company. They're real attorneys. And with Guardian, you're assigned an attorney from day one. That means if a creditor sues, you're not scrambling and you're not hit with surprise legal fees. Now look, I'm telling you straight, debt settlement isn't pretty. I'd rather see you get out of debt the old fashioned way. But. But if you're out of options and you're staring down bankruptcy, Guardian gives you real protection and a path forward. Guardian's attorneys have helped over 55,000 people across the country settle more than $600 million in debt. Not with gimmicks, with legal expertise. So if you want real help instead of a sales pitch, go to guardianlit.com Ramsey that's guardianlit.com Attorney advertising results may vary and no specific outcome is guaranteed. Well, we wish we could get to every call and every question here on the show. If you got a money question and you want an answer for your situation, head over to our website and use Ask Ramsey. Ask Ramsey is our free AI tool that's built and trained on proven Ramsey principles. Can you imagine if we dumped like seven years of radio calls and podcast calls into an AI and let it know how to answer, exactly how we would answer. Oh, and all the financial Peace University lessons. Oh, and all the books I've written, all dumped in there and then you can answer the question the way we would answer the question. Right? That's what Ask Ramsey is. And it's completely free. You're going to get an answer the same way we would. Maybe not qu the level of snark, but probably some level of snark. Ask your question [e-mail] or click the link in the description if you're listening on podcast or YouTube. Matthew is in Orlando. Hi Matthew, how are you?

[Caller]

I'm good. Appreciate you both taking my call.

[Dave Ramsey]

Sure. What's up?

[Caller]

So I looking to be a first time home buyer. I'm 27 years old and I have about $120,000 saved up towards.

[Dave Ramsey]

How did you do that?

[Caller]

Just staying out of debt for a number of years. It builds up over time.

[Dave Ramsey]

Look at you. What do you make a year?

[Caller]

About 80,000 after like stocks that my company gives and stuff.

[Dave Ramsey]

But haven't you heard that all Gen Z's life has been ruined by the real estate market? That it's impossible for you to buy a house and yet you young man, went out and saved $120,000. I'm so proud of you.

[Caller]

You. Well, thank you. But yeah, I just want to make a wise decision with my first home buy. I think I can comfortably get over the 20% needed for a PMI. But I wanted to get as much direction as I possibly could.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay, what are you thinking about doing?

[Caller]

I want to buy a smaller home, so something like the 250 to $300,000 range. But I want to make sure that my funds I'm putting in are going to give me still a comfortable home that I can be able to enjoy for that range.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah, that makes sense. Well, that just involves a lot of shopping. And so what happens is I have found this. When I teach leadership, I often tell guys when they're making decisions. And gals when you're making decisions, he with the most options and the most patience makes the best decision. They also win the, they also win more negotiations by the way. So options mean you look at a lot of properties. You don't go look at three and buy the fourth one and you learn, you learn the market, you drive the neighborhoods, you drive them on Friday night to see if it sounds different in the neighborhood than it does on Thursday morning. You, you know, you check the traffic patterns, you learn and you feel the air and you look at the properties, you look at how old they are, how worn out the appliances are, you know, what am I getting myself into? And you just gather data and, and let that data soak into your brain and it'll become what's called common sense after a while and then you'll make a much better choice than somebody that just moves to town and looks at three houses. Right?

[Caller]

Right. Okay.

[Dave Ramsey]

You're a marathon runner anyway. You're not a sprinter. You like to go steady. That's your style. I can tell by the way you raised that money. You save that money over time.

[Caller]

Right.

[Dave Ramsey]

Use that same personality trait to make this decision.

[Caller]

Okay.

Yeah.

I was wondering about just. I was told, like, foreclosure was an option, but I Not very comfortable with that kind of thought. But I didn't know maybe a home inspection would be interesting enough to kind of warrant some of the risk that might be coming with that.

[Dave Ramsey]

You need a home inspection. You need a home inspection and a title policy no matter what you buy. Foreclosure doesn't necessarily mean bargain and it doesn't necessarily mean the property's trashed, but it could mean both. So you just get in there and dig around and you go, okay, I looked at four houses on this street. They're all 300. This one's 150. But it needs a roof. It's going to need all new landscaping, and I'm going to have to paint it. And all new appliances in the kitchen's got to be torn out. Okay. So I'm going to have another hundred in it. And so I'm going to have 250 in it when I'm done, But it'll be like new. Okay. That might be a deal. Or it's trashed and it's a foreclosure, and they're still trying to get as much for it as everybody else is trying to get for theirs, which happens all the time, by the way. But people buy it and think they got a deal just because it said foreclosure. But it's the same stinking number as the house next door.

[Caller]

Right.

[Dave Ramsey]

That's not a deal. So you know a deal because you've looked at the other ones that aren't a deal.

[Caller]

Gotcha. Okay.

[Dave Ramsey]

And then, you know, I wouldn't suggest you get into a heavy rehab, but if you need some new bushes and a new paint job, you can probably do that one. But I wouldn't. On my first home, 27 years old.

[Caller]

Old.

[Dave Ramsey]

I wouldn't suggest becoming a remodeler all of a sudden.

[Caller]

Okay.

[Dave Ramsey]

Just because they do it on tick tock doesn't mean you need to do it

[Caller]

right.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah. I got a feeling you're going to do really well, Matthew. That guy's got it. He's got it figured out, John.

[John DeLoney]

Yeah, I like that guy, man. And it's. I think you, the word you use that resonated with me is patience. And for a guy like that, once he flips the switch, I'm gonna buy. The real challenge is can you take six weeks or six months and just go slow and the right place will emerge. You got, you, you have cash and you've got diligence and you've got a good salary. You're good.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah. There's no, there's nothing on fire.

[John DeLoney]

Be patient.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah, yeah. Dig up something that you like the house and it's in good enough condition that you can see it becoming with the money that you have, the place that you're going to be for a while. Don't call it your forever home because it's not. There's only one forever home. Heaven. John's in Detroit. Hey John, what's up?

[Caller]

Hey guys, thanks for talking to me. I really appreciate it.

[Dave Ramsey]

Sure. How can we help?

[Caller]

Oh man. So about 6 months ago I had about 250k in the bank. I lived in a $900 apartment debt free and own my car. And I'm a self employed musician. So I was doing pretty good making about 50 to 60 take home a year. So I decided to purchase a home back in November, put about half down on it. And ever since then I've been really sick. I actually got sick from the anxiety of owning a home and I feel like I'm over leveraged. My mortgage is about 1500 bucks a month and I did get sick from kind of having the mortgage and the stress of it and then I was in a car accident, my car got totaled. So I ended up having to get a vehicle and now I have a loan on it for about $9,000. 12,000 with warranty. I'm going to cancel the warranty. So now I have half my money is gone. I have about 100k left in the bank because I was sick. I have uncertainty for the future and you know, I'm just kind of really frightened about being a self employed, first time homebuyer. Been a musician for 30 years and I was actually considering maybe selling my house.

[Dave Ramsey]

How much is your house payment?

[Caller]

It is 1500amonth.

[Dave Ramsey]

You did say that.

[Caller]

I'm sorry, no, that's.

[Dave Ramsey]

And you make $4,000 a month?

[Caller]

Roughly 4 to 5,000 depending on the season. So.

[Dave Ramsey]

And you don't have any other payments?

[Caller]

No, besides my.

[Dave Ramsey]

And you have $100,000 in the bank, right?

[Caller]

But I, sir, I do have my taxes coming up which is about 5,000. I have to replace the garage roof for about 3,000. I didn't escrow my property taxes, which I think I might do, and that's about 6,700 a year because I thought

[Dave Ramsey]

I still got 75,000 and then we paid off the car. So now we still got $65,000 and you have no payments and nothing outstanding.

[Caller]

That's right.

[John DeLoney]

Have you ever owned a home before, John?

[Caller]

No. That's it. When I, when I got In, I, I'm 53 and I overpaid for it. It was in the height of the market.

[John DeLoney]

Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. Like.

[Caller]

Yes.

[John DeLoney]

You've never done this thing before.

[Caller]

That's right.

[John DeLoney]

So cut yourself some slack. Give yourself some grace. You're doing a thing that you've never done before. You've never felt this kind of weight on the squat bar. You got two guys telling us, telling you we know you can lift this.

[Caller]

Oh, is that what you guys are saying? It's a bad idea to sell the house?

[John DeLoney]

Here's what is important, and Dave has helped me with this a lot personally, is when I feel something really big, especially about money, it's always important to look at the math on the paper.

[Dave Ramsey]

Facts are your friends.

[John DeLoney]

Facts are your friends.

[Dave Ramsey]

The facts are the 1500 out of 4000 shouldn't cause you any stress. Especially when you got 65,000 in the bank and zero debt and zero bills and that's where you are. So the stress is manufactured. It's not mathematical. The house is not causing you stress. Your perception of the house is causing stress.

[Caller]

Amen.

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[Dave Ramsey]

Welcome back to the Ramsey show and the Fairwinds credit union studio. Dr. John Deloney, Ramsey personality is my co host today. Andrew is with us in Louisville, Kentucky. Hey Andrew, what's up?

[Caller]

Hey Dave. How's it going man?

[Dave Ramsey]

Better than I deserve. How can I help?

[Caller]

Well, so I'm 21 and I got two kids and I made some financial mistakes around the age of 18. And I'm $70,000 in debt now. And here recently I got into a settlement and I'm going to be getting around $250,000. And I'm wanting to play the waiting game. I don't want to pay it off. I just want to let it fall off on its own. And I want the best advice on

[Dave Ramsey]

what I can do off. Fall off of what?

[Caller]

Fall off of my report, the statute of limitations.

[Dave Ramsey]

No, honey, you owe money.

[Caller]

I know, but.

[Dave Ramsey]

So how did you get $250,000? What happened?

[Caller]

So a kid's mom bought him a 3D printed firearm, or I mean a 3D printer, and he 3D printed a firearm with it and he accidentally shot me. And I'm. Now I went after her homeowners insurance policy and that's what I got out of it. It.

[Dave Ramsey]

That's the wildest thing I've ever heard. You got shot by a 3D printed firearm?

[Caller]

Yes. So the handle, the lower handle, the magazine, and then the slide part is all 3D printed. The only thing metal would be the barrel, the trigger mechanism and the bullets.

[Dave Ramsey]

How old was this kid? I'm just curious. This is fascinating.

[Caller]

14.

[Dave Ramsey]

And he knows how to build a firearm from scratch?

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Dave Ramsey]

Well, there's YouTube, I guess. Yeah. Wow.

[John DeLoney]

Wild world we live in.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah. That's nuts. Okay, so her, they pay off 250 grand. You owe 70,000 on what?

[Caller]

The Dodge Hellcat. I'll just. I put it. Put it to you there. I went and got it brand new.

[Dave Ramsey]

Where is it?

[Caller]

I got approved. It's gone.

[Dave Ramsey]

Where'd it go?

[Caller]

The only reason they did it got sold.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay. Yeah. Replay.

[Caller]

I couldn't tell you. I have no idea. Like I said, I made some.

[Dave Ramsey]

You weren't that drunk. Where'd the car go?

[Caller]

It got sold.

[Dave Ramsey]

And who sold it? You had to sell it? You owned it?

[Caller]

Yes.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay, so you sold it. It didn't get sold. I sold it.

[Caller]

It.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay. When you sold it, how? You didn't pay it off?

[Caller]

No.

[Dave Ramsey]

How did you sell a car, give title without paying it off?

[Caller]

No title. That's a lot of the deals nowadays. People like cars that way. What had happened was the fuel pump had went out and it was going to cost around 1500 dollars for just the part alone. And you know, as I mentioned, being

[Dave Ramsey]

18, these days I'm kind of up on and I never heard anybody buying a dadgum Car without a title. How'd you get tags?

[Caller]

They. It came with it. They didn't buy it for, I guess you would say leisurely driving, if that makes sense.

[John DeLoney]

Are they too fast, too furious?

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah. Drug dealer doing runs and so they didn't. So it's still titled to you?

[Caller]

No, I would say morally track. Track stuff. Because a lot of the tracks, they don't require cars to have titles or VINs or anything like that.

[Dave Ramsey]

All right, so you owe $70,000 on a car that you didn't pay off when you sold it.

[Caller]

Correct.

[Dave Ramsey]

Now all of it is that.

[Caller]

Yes, that's it.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay, well, when you get your 250, you write a check and you pay the people that you owe because you screwed them.

[Caller]

Correct.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay, good. Now we have. Now we have 180.

[Caller]

Now my question would be, though, could I come at them with, say, 50 full check?

[Dave Ramsey]

How do you come at them with anything? I don't know.

[John DeLoney]

I want you to be a person of integrity here, brother. Like, you walked into a place Even though you're 18, and you said, hey, I'll give you this amount of money if you give me that car right now. And they said, deal. And they made a bad deal. And you were 18, didn't know what you're doing, but you shook hands and signed a piece of paper, bro.

[Dave Ramsey]

Brother.

[Caller]

Correct.

[John DeLoney]

And just because a 14 year old printed a gun and shot you with it like that, and you have this windfall of cash, all of a sudden, thank God you weren't permanently injured.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah. So, man, do us right. What do you make a year?

[Caller]

Right now I'm making close to 70 of where I'm located.

[Dave Ramsey]

Good. Good for you. Okay. Okay. All right. So you call them up and say, I need to settle this debt. What will you accept? And see what they say. And whatever they tell you, write them a check for that. Okay. Then maybe. Maybe they'll take 50. They might. Okay. And here. One of the things that we find as we've studied, wealthy people is not like I was told when I was growing up, up, not by my parents, but by people in my neighborhood, they all said, wealthy people are crooks. Okay? And all the data that we have today tells us it's quite the opposite. And so if you want to become a wealthy person, that changes your family tree, that your children have a different life than you had. And then your dad had. And then his dad had. And you change everything. You have to become a person of extreme integrity. Quit doing crap under the table cars with no titles, and quit looking For a shortcut on everything, just do the right thing, show up for work, work your butt off while you're at work and people will notice because that alone is unusual. And just become a man of extreme integrity. And that would be my prescription for you. If you want to call them and say, all right guys, I owe you this. I did this deal when I was 18. I know you probably got 70 or 100 or whatever on it. What will you take? I'll write you a check today if you'll make me a deal. And you, you know, and then just they're probably, they might say 50, 50 would actually be a good deal for them. And then the next time you get ready to buy a car, be a grown up, write a check for the car, buy a, buy a father of two car, which a hellcat would not be on the list. Okay. And you know, and pay cash for it and get a title and go get tags on it and be like a functioning part of society. And then that leads you towards being able to grow and to function and to win.

[John DeLoney]

Dave and I started working here, right? All of this was new to me and I kept going to these meetings about the Deloney brand. And I remember after the third or fourth meeting I kind of threw a little fit and I was like, guys, I don't want a brand. I don't like that idea. I don't like that word. I don't want that. And Tim Newton, who does all of that here, globally, here at Ramsey is one of the most amazing minds I've ever been around. He said, john, all a brand is is who you are when you're not in the room. What do people think about you? How do they feel about you? What do they know about you when you're not in the room? And that changed to change me. And I want Andrew when he's not in the room there in Louisville, Kentucky. I want everyone to know, oh, that guy is a man of integrity.

[Dave Ramsey]

He's a stand up dude, that guy.

[John DeLoney]

We can count on that guy. That guy's a great dad. He's a great dad.

[Dave Ramsey]

He's always going to great husband. Yes, he's a wonderful neighbor. Yes, he serves.

[John DeLoney]

They just that's who that you are when you're not in the room because of how present and generous you are when you are in the room. Be the that guy.

[Dave Ramsey]

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[John DeLoney]

10% off up to a $250 value.

[Dave Ramsey]

See store for detail. Marie is in Phoenix. Hi, Marie. How are you?

[Caller]

I'm good, Dave. How are you? Thank you for having me on the show, Dave and John.

[Dave Ramsey]

Sure. What's up?

[Caller]

I'm wondering if you can settle a long debate between my boyfriend and I.

[John DeLoney]

Yes.

[Caller]

Yes.

[John DeLoney]

I love these.

[Caller]

We both own our separate homes and we have our separate home expenses, but he stays at my house about four nights a week and our debate is like, should he contribute to rent or some household expenses? And he feels that he shouldn't.

[Dave Ramsey]

How old are you two?

[Caller]

I'm 62 and he's 51.

[Dave Ramsey]

Why? Are you not married?

[Caller]

No. Why? Because we've both been married before and he doesn't want to get married and

[Dave Ramsey]

he doesn't want to pay any expenses.

[Caller]

No.

[Dave Ramsey]

But he wants to sleep there.

[Caller]

Yes. Yes. He believes he takes me out to dinner like once a week.

[Dave Ramsey]

No. I mean. Yeah, you missed the point, I guess.

[Caller]

No, I get it. I get it. Yes.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay.

[John DeLoney]

Why are you settling for this?

[Caller]

Because it works for me. I guess.

[John DeLoney]

It doesn't. That's why you're calling?

[Caller]

Well, it's. We've fought over it for years.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah. You should stop that. Yeah. The fighting part. You should just. You should decide and end it.

[Caller]

One of the, you know, I and the relationship.

Or end.

[Dave Ramsey]

No, I'm just saying end the fight. I don't fight over something for years. I just either get in or I get out of the fight. And I'm not going to.

[Caller]

Going to.

[Dave Ramsey]

I'll lose the fight or win the fight or something, but I'm not going to. We're done. We're done talking about this. Years.

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah. Like you're also your pet.

[John DeLoney]

How long have you been dating?

[Caller]

About six years.

[John DeLoney]

Oh, Good grief.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay. I'm. Okay. So the truth is, the way I answer questions on the show is I try to think about what I would do if I were in your situation, and I can't put myself there because I wouldn't be in your situation. I would get married if I were you guys. Or I would. Or I wouldn't move on.

[John DeLoney]

I break up with somebody who disrespects me so much.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah. That they, you know, they want to sleep with me, but they don't want to marry me. So. Yeah, but. But. So I can't put my. I'm having trouble honestly answering your question. I'm not trying to make a judgment on you. I'm just trying to say I can't put myself in your shoes. I can't make that work. So can I throw something in here?

[John DeLoney]

Dave?

[Dave Ramsey]

I think he has his expenses. You have your expenses, and I think you lose the argument. Then you decide if you want him to sleep there or not. But you have your house. He has his house. You could be over his house or you could be at your house.

[Caller]

Well, we can't be at his house.

[Dave Ramsey]

Why?

[Caller]

Because he lives twice as far from our jobs, and I have dogs, and he doesn't want dogs in his house, and obviously I can't leave them here.

[John DeLoney]

Okay, that actually brings me closer to a question I have. I think I'm right on something. I think you're asking him to spend money on expenses. That is your workaround to more emotional connection with this guy.

[Caller]

What do you mean by that?

[John DeLoney]

I mean, I don't think this is about dollars and cents. I think this is about are you. Are we doing this thing together or not? And he is being very clear. We are not doing this together.

[Dave Ramsey]

I don't do dogs, and I don't do marriage, and I don't pay your expenses.

[John DeLoney]

I take you out.

[Dave Ramsey]

There's a lot. A lot of things he doesn't do.

[John DeLoney]

Yeah, I. Yeah, I. I think, Dave, this is less about money and this is more about. I'm like, he won't do my dogs. He won't marry me. He won't make a long term commitment. So I'm gonna go around this way and see if I can. I can squeeze some emotional connection by. You're participating in the bills. You're participating in the rhythm of the house. And some sign of commitment, some sign that we're doing this. He's super clear. Behaviors of language. We are not together.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah.

[John DeLoney]

I sleep with you when I'm at your house. I get what I Want I then go to my. And do my life by myself, privately, in my own way? That's a huge hu. I mean, there's red flags.

[Dave Ramsey]

And you're okay with that arrangement? That's your decision?

[John DeLoney]

Yes. Be a grown up and stop fighting about it. Just say this is the way this is going to be and I'm accepting it and I'm going to move on. I'm not going to choose to be miserable.

[Dave Ramsey]

If you're going to stay in this relationship, I think he wins the argument.

[John DeLoney]

Yes, I agree.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah, I think, I think you have your expenses. He has his expenses, and I'm not going to charge him for a booty call.

[John DeLoney]

And then you get. Yeah, you get to decide whether you want to continue in this expense arrangement.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah, yeah. That's what's going on. I mean, it's not. It's, you know, I don't want to be that person. I don't be in these people, but yeah. All right. Natalie is in Boston. Hey, Natalie, what's up?

[Caller]

Hi. I am just wondering if I should go after my ex husband's 401k.

[Dave Ramsey]

For what?

[Caller]

Unpaid child support. He hasn't paid me in about 11 years. We've been divorced. 11 years.

[Dave Ramsey]

Why haven't you done something before now?

[Caller]

He's. It's a little complicated. He's been in and out of prison and I don't know, I guess I've. I've tried to file with the state that I live in and they basically told me to.

Can't squeeze money from a rock.

There's been times he's been on the street and he's in there in and out of jail for domestic violence and drug charges. And I think he forgot that this exists because I think he would have cleaned it out if had he known. And. Yeah, so that's where I'm at.

[Dave Ramsey]

This exists. So you found it?

[Caller]

He had something sent in the mail and I thought. I opened it. Yes.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay. And how much is in it?

[Caller]

About 60,000.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay. And how much are you owed?

[Caller]

Over a hundred thousand.

Okay.

[Dave Ramsey]

Have. How long has it been since you talked to your divorce attorney?

[Caller]

I didn't have one. I think he magically thought that if he didn't show up to court that

we wouldn't get divorced.

He didn't want the divorce. So. So 11 years ago, I just. I did it myself and got granted a divorce and got sole custody.

[John DeLoney]

And when's the last time you talked to him?

[Caller]

Last year. Every. Every year he'll kind of call and

be under the influence and Try to

say he wants to see the kids or something, but it's not really a.

[John DeLoney]

Do you need this money or are you mad?

[Caller]

Sort of. I guess I'm just mad. I'm engaged to be married to a wonderful man in June. He doesn't want to wake the beast.

He said he's left us, left me

alone for the past few years, for the most part. Besides that occasional once a year call or so.

[Dave Ramsey]

I like him.

[John DeLoney]

Dave may disagree with me. I agree with your. I agree with your fiance.

[Dave Ramsey]

I agree with your fiance too.

[Caller]

You do?

[John DeLoney]

Because I think you saw this number and you got really pissed off, rightfully so. And you felt that you remembered a decade of grinding it out, three jobs, not seeing your kids. You remember, all that came to the surface immediately.

[Caller]

Right.

[John DeLoney]

And you want to start this whole thing over and you, you remember how hellacious the divorce was when he wasn't responding to anything. He just, he was like, yeah, I dare the sheriff to come kick me out.

[Dave Ramsey]

He's a bad dude.

[John DeLoney]

He's not a good guy.

[Caller]

No, he's not a good guy.

[Dave Ramsey]

So I. Yeah. And lastly, I'll tell you this. I don't know the answer to the legal question. And you'd have to find someone that does know the answer, like an attorney if you wanted to ask someone. But as I understand it, a 401k cannot be touched by a lawsuit. I know that part is true. I don't know if that is true on child support, if that allowed child support would violate that or not. And so I'm not sure you can get to it anyway.

[Caller]

Right.

[Dave Ramsey]

If you want to put that part to peace in your mind and go, well, I can't get it anyway way then unless he voluntarily pulls it out and gives it to me. You can make his life miserable like it already until he made it, until he pulled it out and gave it to you. But.

[John DeLoney]

Or you can take the cinder block that is him out of your backpack for good.

[Dave Ramsey]

Just, just walk away.

[John DeLoney]

You've got a good new guy that you're marrying with. You're going to create a whole new life. Your kids are stable and healthy because of the, the awesomeness of the last 10 years, the grinding and, and, and, and just making it all work that you've done last 10 years.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yep.

[John DeLoney]

Man. Choose peace over this one. That, that'd be my opinion. You go burn them to the ground. But you're going to get, you're going to get burned too.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah. Fires hot. And I don't think you can get the money anyway. I'm not sure. I don't know if you can get it or not in a 401k with child support, but if it was a regular lawsuit, I can tell you you can't get it. It's not accessible. It's accessible in a divorce. A divorce attorney or divorce lawyer probate can make you Split up a 401k in the process of a divorce. Divorce. So they may be able to do it on child support. I don't know. But I, I think overall you don't need it and you sure don't need him around. So I'm with your. I'm with your fiance and John. I love entrepreneurs. Don't forget guys. I started my company on a card table myself. So I know what it's like to have people counting on you, your team, your family, not to mention your customers. And when you're the one signing the paychecks, you can't afford to fly blind. But I'll be honest. Early on, one thing that nearly sunk us was wasting time with spreadsheets that didn't add up because business units didn't talk to each other. I finally told my team, just fix it. And they did. We got netsuite. That was years ago and we've never looked back. See, netsuite isn't just for tech giants. It's built for growing businesses like yours. Over 43,000 businesses already run on NetSuite, including a lot that started just like you. And now with built in AI, NetSuite is helping them even more. It's one system connected to every part of your business for real time insights, not guesswork. NetSuite AI flags inventory issues, cash flow risks, even supplier delays before they become problems. So you can trust the data data stop wasting time and make the right decisions faster. Take a free product tour [e-mail] Ramsey that's netsuite.com Ramsey. Are you sick and tired of working so hard but having nothing to show for it? Run, run, run, run, run Like a rat and a wheel fall over. Well, that's normal. Normal's broke. Normal sucks. We don't want to be normal. And you don't have to live that way. Our every dollar budget app helps you find extra money every month and shows you how to get out of debt and build wealth. It builds you a personalized plan. In just 15 minutes, you're gonna find thousands of dollars in hidden margin and you're gonna feel like you got a raise and you're gonna see a way out. We're gonna show you, we're gonna walk with you right through the app. Don't be normal when you can live like no one else. Start every dollar for free in the App Store or Google Play. Evelyn is in Atlanta. Hi, Evelyn. How are you?

[Caller]

Good. How are you?

[Dave Ramsey]

Better than I deserve. What's up?

[Caller]

Okay, so I'm 24 years old and I've been working since I've been 15. I haven savings and I put all of my, my expenses on a credit card. I have like 2,000 to $3,000 and that I spend a month on my credit card. And after I pay that off, I pay it off on four every month. But after I pay it off, I only have like a hundred to $200 left. I, I basically live paycheck to paycheck, and I've been living like that ever since I started working. And I do. I use the college savings that my parents had for me as a down payment for a duplex, and I rent it out. But whenever big repairs come up, I have to borrow money from them to pay it off. And I just want to stop doing that. I want to break the cycle and start saving money, stop using my credit card and just breaking the bad habits of spending money.

Like, it's not.

No tomorrow.

[Dave Ramsey]

So you make about $3,000 a month?

[Caller]

I make like, yeah, like. Yeah, 3,000, 4,000.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay, but you said you put 2,000 on the card.

[Caller]

I put. It's as usually my. Every time. My, my. It's usually like $3 in the, around there on the credit card. Like, I put all of my.

[Dave Ramsey]

What do you do for a living?

[Caller]

I work for the post office.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay. And what's the duplex worth?

[Caller]

It? I got it with equity, so I got it with 20k equity. It's worth 250 right now.

[Dave Ramsey]

And what do you owe on it?

[Caller]

Basically 2, 230.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay. So it's really not a big blessing. It's more of a curse,

[Caller]

I would say. I.

[Dave Ramsey]

It costs you money. It doesn't make you money.

[Caller]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Dave Ramsey]

Sell it.

[Caller]

You think? Well, I'm trying. I'm wanting to use that as like a retirement plan.

[Dave Ramsey]

It's not a retirement plan. It's not. It's draining money. It's not adding money. It sucks.

[Caller]

Money I get rental income from costs

[Dave Ramsey]

you more than it makes you. Yeah.

[John DeLoney]

Evelyn, the only way you can go forward here is to exhale and say, what I've been doing is not working. I'll try something else.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah.

[Caller]

And what do you. What do you guys, like, suggest? Like, the truth Is, I understand I

have a spending problem.

And like, I, I don't think you do.

[Dave Ramsey]

I think you have a systems problem. I think the system you're using to handle money sucks. So what would be wrong with just cutting up your credit card and paying cash for things?

[Caller]

No, nothing. Honestly, I think I've just done it so long.

[Dave Ramsey]

I know, but just, just let's try something new. This sucks.

[Caller]

Bucks.

[Dave Ramsey]

You called me because it wasn't working. So cut up your credit card, take your paycheck, turn it into money, pay cash for your groceries, put some money in a checking account and use a debit card or whatever to pay your light bill. Pay your landlord. I assume you're renting.

[Caller]

No, I actually live with my parents.

[Dave Ramsey]

Oh, okay.

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay. So you don't have any overhead. You have $3,000 a month coming in. You got a car pay payment?

[Caller]

No, actually, I don't have any debt actually.

[Dave Ramsey]

Other than the duplex.

[Caller]

Yeah. Huh. Okay.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah. I mean, what if you cut up your credit card and just took your paycheck and used it to live on?

[Caller]

Yeah, I mean, it's the same thing.

[Dave Ramsey]

It's the same thing you're doing.

[Caller]

No. Yeah, yeah. Okay.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah. Use the jump on on the app store and get the Every Dollar app and put it on your phone and say, I got this much coming in at 3200 coming in this month and I'm going to give every one of those dollars a name. If you want something different than you have now, you're going to have to do something different than you do now. And right now I'm listening to you and I've been coaching people with money for 35 years and your duplex idea is broken. It sucks. It's taking money from you, it's not adding money to you. And, and you're living like a 12 year old in terms of how you're handling money. You just spend it until it's gone and then you have no emotional connection to it whatsoever. I'm asking you to be an adult, step back and get over the top of the money and tell the money what to do before the month begins on the EveryDollar app. Make Every one of those dollars behave and then go do that exact thing with that money and you're going to be no worse off. You're actually going to be better off because you're going to be in control of it. And right now you just spend until you run out and you're stuck at your parents house at 24 years old.

[John DeLoney]

And so on top of that, on top of your post office job, I want you to go get a second job. You're 24, you're unattached, you're living at home. Go get a second job so you can start earning more money than just three or four grand a month. And you can sock that money away and begin to build yourself an emergency fund. Begin to build yourself a financial cushion so you can get your own place one day.

[Caller]

Day.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah.

[John DeLoney]

And right now is the time to

[Dave Ramsey]

work like crazy, get your own life as soon as possible. As soon as possible. Hannah is with us in Newark, New Jersey. Hey, Hannah, what's up?

[Caller]

Hello, Dave and John. Thank you for taking my call.

[Dave Ramsey]

Sure. How can we help?

[Caller]

My question is about charge off and how long they stay on the credit report.

[Dave Ramsey]

Seven years from date of last activity.

[Caller]

Okay. All right. So I have one in which it's recorded that on my credit report I paid it all. I paid my last payment, not paid it off, but my last payment was in May of 2019. And that's exactly the same month and year they closed the it closing.

[Dave Ramsey]

It doesn't matter the date, the last date you paid on it or used it in any way. The last date there was, any activity on the account. Seven years later, it will not be on your credit bureau report. Spoiler alert. Spoiler alert. That doesn't matter. They still will sue you. Whether it's on your credit bureau report or not doesn't matter. They still. It's still a legal debt debt.

[Caller]

Right.

[Dave Ramsey]

Dropping off your credit bureau report does not help you.

[John DeLoney]

It only helps you go borrow more money.

[Caller]

Well, I'm not interested in borrowing any.

[John DeLoney]

That's what I mean. That's why Dave says it doesn't matter.

[Caller]

But I just wondering. But you're. But I was just wondering how long it takes to come off and you said seven last.

[Dave Ramsey]

Seven years from the date of last activity. And they could choose to do a report on it and start the seven years over because inactivity coming from them is also activity. So what kind of debt is this?

[Caller]

Okay, well, it was credit card debt.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay. And how much is it?

[Caller]

It's like 6,000 something.

[Dave Ramsey]

And what do you make a year?

[Caller]

50,000.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay. Do you have any money at all?

[Caller]

No, not right now. Not right now. I'm trying to save up.

[Dave Ramsey]

If it drops off in May, and I don't think it will probably, usually they download the data on the credit bureaus once a quarter and so May would be the seven year date and sometime in the following quarter it might drop off. Okay. And if you called them and offered them $500 cash as settlement in full, they might take it. And that would clear up the debt,

[Caller]

but it wouldn't be paid in full, just settled.

[Dave Ramsey]

Settled in full. And it'll be on your credit bureau as settled. A bad debt that was settled for seven more years doesn't keep you from doing anything, but it does keep you from getting another credit card, hopefully for a while anyway, but that'll get it actually out of your life to settle it with them. And super old credit card debt, they will settle for pennies on the dollar, get it in writing and do not give them electronic access to your checking account if you're going to do that.

[Caller]

Sam,

[Dave Ramsey]

Corey is in Baltimore. Hi, Corey, how are you?

[Caller]

I'm well, Dave. How are you?

[Dave Ramsey]

Better than I deserve. What's up?

[Caller]

So I am currently trying to figure out if it would be a good idea or if it's morally okay to accept a position at a job knowing that I may be moving to another state or area as early as July and as late as December.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay, what kind of a position are you talking about accepting?

[Caller]

So I would be transferring from my current. I work within a school and I will be transferring to another building within the district. But I don't want to take another. I don't want to accept another position knowing that I may be gone.

[Dave Ramsey]

I heard that. What kind of a position are you talking about? You're asking me if it's morally acceptable to do this. What is it?

[Caller]

I'm a social. I'm a school social worker.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay. So if you take this, you're going to move from one school to another as a social worker?

[Caller]

Yes.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay. And so. Well, a good, A good way to test ethics is very simple. Treat other people like you'd want to be treated. So the supervisor and the principal at that school where you would be going if you were sitting in their seat, how would you want Corey to handle this?

[Caller]

I would want somebody who is being forward with me and, you know, is being honest about the fact that it may happen or it may not happen?

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah. So what is it? What is it dependent upon? What. What caused the move to happen?

[Caller]

Accepting a job in that area.

[Dave Ramsey]

So you're continuing to look for a different job while you took the new job but in a different state?

[Caller]

Yeah, we were looking to relocate December, my family and I. Oh, is your

[Dave Ramsey]

wife have a job?

[Caller]

She. Yes, she does.

[Dave Ramsey]

In the new place?

[Caller]

No. So we're both looking to relocate, but that's kind of what is delaying us now. Because we haven't found anything in that area yet.

[John DeLoney]

I would take the job. The chances of this all working out on this timeline that you've imagined is slim and none right now.

[Dave Ramsey]

Neither one of you have a new job in the new place, right? Yet.

[John DeLoney]

Are you a finalist for a job in a new place?

[Caller]

No, it's just she's from that area, so she. We're wanting to move back down.

[Dave Ramsey]

So right now it's just a discussion.

[John DeLoney]

Yeah.

[Dave Ramsey]

So where did you, where did you come up actually? Talk to anyone about being hired there yet?

[John DeLoney]

Yeah, where'd you come up with July or December?

[Caller]

We've been applying places, but we haven't gotten anything back. But yeah, we've been pretty active about it, but haven't heard anything back.

[Dave Ramsey]

Well, the answer to your question. You answered the question yourself. The answer to your question, is it morally acceptable to take the new job? The answer is yes, if you tell them I think we might move, but I'm not sure yet. And I want to give you a heads up on that before you give. Before you give me this position. And then based on that, they have to make their decision as to whether they want you or not in this school district.

[John DeLoney]

Would that conversation cost you your job?

[Caller]

I don't think it would cost me my current job.

[Dave Ramsey]

What about the new one?

[Caller]

It could potentially cost me the new one.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay. Okay, then stay where you are.

[John DeLoney]

Is the new and more money and a promotion of any sort or is it just a different, different location?

[Caller]

It would be a better work environment.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah. Okay. Well, I think you just have to be up front. I mean, that's how I would want to be treated if I was the principal at the new place. I don't want to go to the trouble of onboarding a guy going through all the paperwork crap, everything else knowing he's going to be gone in six months and he didn't tell me.

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Dave Ramsey]

If you're going to work for a company I hunt in an executive type role, I a hundred percent wouldn't hire you. But if you're going to work for the local coffee shop as a barista, well, they turn over like yesterday's underwear anyway, so it doesn't matter. Right. So it depends on the environment that you're going into. Is high turnover situation. If you're going to work at Home Depot as a clerk, they're not expecting you to be there in six months anyway. But here you're kind of making a commitment. So you need the people you're making a commitment to need to make their decision based on the actual knowledge of what's going on. Otherwise. Yeah, you're misleading them, and that is unethical. I agree with your, I think your conundrum. I think your heart was already telling you that, wasn't it?

[Caller]

Yeah, yeah.

[Dave Ramsey]

That's why you asked the question. You wouldn't ask the question if you didn't make conscience about, about it. So.

[John DeLoney]

But I would also say, like I'm trying to imagine, I, I worked in education for 20 years. If somebody came and sat down and said, hey, thank you so much for this opportunity. I want to be honest with you. My wife wants to move back to be around her family.

[Dave Ramsey]

We haven't found anything. We haven't found anything that might happen someday.

[John DeLoney]

It's going to take us both getting jobs. It might be six months, it might be six years. But I just want to put that on the table that we do have a family vision of going back home one day. I, I would say say I'm gonna, I want you on my team for that level of integrity. And I would take the gamble. Probably it's not all going to work out in six months.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah.

[John DeLoney]

And so if, if you're a great social worker, man, there's gonna be schools lining up for you to come work for them so that I, I, yeah, I be honest, but also tell the

[Dave Ramsey]

whole story and then let the chips fall where they fall. You tell the story and then you can live, you can sleep at night. You go, okay, they didn't want me because of that. I'll stay where I am, fair. And so the price of me, the price of my integrity is I get to stay in this place less good environment while I look for a new job in another state.

[John DeLoney]

That's right.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah. And that's always, always, always, when you get to the end of your life, a good thing that you did it. Jaden is in Oklahoma. Hi, Jaden. How are you?

[Caller]

Hi there. I'm very well. How about you?

[Dave Ramsey]

Better than I deserve. What? What's up?

[Caller]

Hey. Well, I'm curious about if I'm being maybe a cheapskate about buying an engagement ring.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yes.

[John DeLoney]

$0.75, Dave and Buster's. Turn the knob, brother.

[Dave Ramsey]

If you have to ask the question, you are. No, I'm kidding. I'm messing with you. So what are you thinking about spending right now?

[Caller]

I'm thinking about 4,000.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay. And what do you make a month?

[Caller]

Month? In a month I make five.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay. That's okay with me. That's not cheap skating. I tell, I tell people no more than A month's income. The jewelry store tells you three months income, but they sell jewelry.

[John DeLoney]

Kelly's producing the show right here. She just passed out. You don't like that Kelly, she wants about seven or eight months.

[Dave Ramsey]

Wow. Okay, so here's the thing. There is no direct correlation between the length and quality of the marriage to the expense of the ring. As a matter of fact, there might be an inverse correlation that the more expensive the ring, the less likely you are to actually make it.

[John DeLoney]

Where is this cheapskate idea coming from you or from her or your buddies?

[Caller]

It's more from her. She. She sent some. Some really beautiful rings, and I'm more in like the 6, 7, 8 kind of range. But we're both still in debt, and I'm just trying to figure it out.

[John DeLoney]

All right, have you. Have you?

[Dave Ramsey]

Well, the difference in 4 and 6 is not a deal breaker one way or the other.

[John DeLoney]

But have you had that conversation with her?

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah, she said she wants to say we've sat down.

[John DeLoney]

No, the conversation underneath the conversation about, hey, we both owe a bunch of money and I know you. I would love to be able to buy you an 8, $10,000 ring. I don't have that kind of money. Do you. Do you want me to save up and give you this? Like, have you all had that conversation?

[Caller]

Maybe not in the way you're posing it.

[John DeLoney]

If you can have that conversation, it'll set you up to have a great marriage for the rest of your life.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah.

[John DeLoney]

Because that's. That's marriage right there. Being able to have the question that is actually the question beneath the thing y' all are fighting about.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah. And here's the thing. It doesn't have to be forever either. It's one ring. So Sharon's is a. Her engagement rings. A point two, three means you can't even find it with a magnifying glasses. So.

[John DeLoney]

Stinking, man, talk about she bought low

[Dave Ramsey]

point, she bought low three.

[John DeLoney]

She roi. That one, man.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah, well, guess what. What? The thing she wears on her hand now is causing carpal tunnel syndrome. So I only have one working headlight

[John DeLoney]

because I look directly at it one time.

[Dave Ramsey]

Spotlight. That you bring in Hollywood actors with.

[John DeLoney]

That's exactly right.

[Dave Ramsey]

But. Yeah, but the. But, yeah, we traded to the 0.23 and it's in the safe. We kept it for sentimental reasons, but not for value reasons. And. And it's like it's worked for 44 years. So. Yeah. I think the conversation around it, Jaden, is more than the cost.

[John DeLoney]

Yes.

[Dave Ramsey]

Is more important than the actual cost in this situation.

[Caller]

So.

[Dave Ramsey]

But somewhere around a month and four to six is somewhere around a month. You're right. If you told me 18,000, now we got a different problem.

[John DeLoney]

Now you're in Kellyville and that's a whole different level of drama.

[Dave Ramsey]

Oh,

[Caller]

Sam.

[Dave Ramsey]

Welcome back to the Ramsey show in the Fairwinds Credit Union Studios. I'm Dave Ramsey. Your host, Dr. John DeLoney Ramsey, personality number one best selling author is my co host today. Ray is in San Jose, California. Hi, Ray, how are you?

[Caller]

Hey, Dave. It's such an honor to talk to you.

[Dave Ramsey]

You too.

[Caller]

I have a question. I am. Well, a little backstory. I'm 36, newly married, I'm working on the dead snowball, trying to get my and my husband's new life in order. And I have a uncle who is 78 years old here in California who has asked me to be the executor of his will in that he said he wants to bless me with his rental property in Arizona in that will. It sounds great right off the bat, but I know you're the expert on real estate and I just. While he's still here with us, is there anything that I should be prepared of? I don't want to walk into a rude awakening when he passes. And you know, if there's $8,000 left on the mortgage or any repairs or taxes, and here I'm trying to clean up my life and I get stuck in a bear trap.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay. Does he own a lot of other assets as well?

[Caller]

He has a kind of like an elderly mobile home that he's leaving to a nephew of his. And so I kind of looked in the wheel and I said, you know, Unc, well, if there is a mortgage left, which is 8,000 as of today, how would that be taken care of? And he said, well, I would want you to use the money in my bank account. And I said, well, that's not in your will. So the good news is we have a meeting with his estate planner in May. And so I kind of just wanted to call this show and get my debts in order to.

[Dave Ramsey]

So he's going to give you the property. What was he going to do with the money in his checking account? Who was going to receive that in

[Caller]

his will with the mobile home? Was going to be the nephew.

[Dave Ramsey]

Oh, okay. So the mobile nephew would get the checking account and the mobile home. The house in Arizona. Does it have a mortgage?

[Caller]

It does. There's $8,000 as of today left.

[Dave Ramsey]

Oh, that's the $8,000. So there's no money coming to you currently to pay off that mortgage.

[Caller]

Correct. What he's saying is, oh, just use the, use the money in my bank account.

[Dave Ramsey]

And I said, well then you'd have to leave me the money in your bank account. Account.

[Caller]

Right. So I'm like, let me call Dave and get my stuff in order.

[Dave Ramsey]

So the will needs to state that the cash, that $8,000 cash comes to you, other cash and, and any other cash above $8,000 and the mobile home go to the other nephew, your cousin, I take it. And then you have a paid for house that you're receiving. Do you have any idea what this house is worth

[Caller]

right now? It looks like 300,000.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay. So wonderful gift.

[Caller]

I've never been to Arizona.

[Dave Ramsey]

Well, you're going to sell it. You're going to sell it right after he dies, correct? Yeah. And you're going to use it to have your life, you and your new husband's life. And you're going to pay off whatever debt you've got and, or build wealth for you and your kids and your husband. And you're going to go forward. We do not need a rental property in Arizona. So an executor, if you look at the word executor, it has built into it the word execute.

[Caller]

Correct.

[Dave Ramsey]

So your job, if you're the executor, is to execute what the will says. So you're very wise to do what you're doing and make sure that you agree with what the will says and that is there. The only other question I've got is who's going to be pissed off that got nothing.

[Caller]

He doesn't have a wife or any kids. It's just this, this nephew and myself that he says he could trust.

[John DeLoney]

What about your mom or dad, whoever's his brother,

[Caller]

mom or dad, whoever. He's a second uncle. So my dad, my dad isn't left anything.

[John DeLoney]

So is that going to be a problem between you two?

[Caller]

Let's be real. Probably.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay, then you all need to talk about that before he dies.

[Caller]

Yeah.

Yeah, he needs to.

[Dave Ramsey]

He needs to tell your dad that I'm leaving this to your daughter and I'm leaving this to your nephew.

[Caller]

Correct? Correct.

[Dave Ramsey]

Because I don't want you to inherit drama. Your job is not to execute drama. Your job is to execute his wishes in the will. And sometimes people don't. They piss people off after they die rather than while they're alive. And so that's the, that is the case here. So I would make this to where it's a Slam dunk. There's no question. Nobody's mad. If you're going to be mad at somebody, you need to be mad at the uncle while he's alive.

[Caller]

Right?

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah. Not you. You didn't do anything.

[Caller]

I appreciate that. Last question. So when this property comes in and sold and the it's paid off, then the only thing that comes out of the sale is the taxes of Arizona or any repairs to get this property up to date so it can sell. And the real estate agent gets their half and we call it a day.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yep. Not their half, but they get a commission. Yeah.

[Caller]

Yes.

Yes.

[Dave Ramsey]

Call it a day. And there's no, there is no income tax on this. If you inherited at death and sell it within six months, market value is the basis. So you won't have any income tax.

[Caller]

Okay.

[John DeLoney]

Oh, I didn't know. Reset the basis.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yep. Stepped up basis on death.

[John DeLoney]

Yeah, I did not know that. So she's not going to have to pay capital gains tax.

[Dave Ramsey]

No capital gains tax on it at all.

[John DeLoney]

If she holds it for five years and it goes up to 600 grand,

[Dave Ramsey]

taxes on the 300 increase.

[John DeLoney]

Excellent. I didn't know that. Okay.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah. If you sell it within six months, it's perfect proposed. It's supposed that you, that you sold it for market value and at time of death.

[Caller]

Dave, would you sell it right away

[John DeLoney]

or would you just instantly.

[Caller]

Okay, yeah.

[John DeLoney]

You don't want to be a landlord.

[Caller]

Thank you.

[Dave Ramsey]

There's no point that you had $300,000 piled in the middle of your table, the kitchen table, and you went and bought a rental house in Arizona in

[John DeLoney]

a state you've never been to.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah. That's not even a, not even a possibility. So, you know, and that's reverse engineering, which is called a sunk cost analysis. And that tells you to hold. Do it, don't keep it, don't keep it, don't keep it, don't keep it. This is why people keep it. We moved from Atlanta to Chicago and kept our house as a rental. That's a landlord by default. And that always is a recipe for bad things to happen. Like someone changing their Harley oil in your living room. That's when this kind of crap happens. Right there. That's exactly what happens. Bad idea, bad idea idea. So, yeah, you're right. You're approaching this with a lot of wisdom. You're. You're the executor. You're going to have to execute. And you've already realized that what's in the will and there wasn't money to pay off your house because the will didn't state what happened to the checking account money. And so now you're having that reworked with the lawyer. That's wise. I would also just ask your uncle to call your dad and say, hey, I don't want you to be mad at anybody. I'm leaving this to your daughter and you need to be happy for her. And your uncle can do that. And it'll keep your dad from getting himself twisted. And if he wants to get twisted, he can do it now instead of at you later. And you don't get into all kinds of drama over a tiny little estate of an old trailer plus 300 grand.

[John DeLoney]

But, Dave, we've taken the call where she's going to get 300 grand from the sale of this house, and dad's going to be knocking on the door saying, where's my car cut?

[Dave Ramsey]

And I want some. Yeah, that's. That should have been mine.

[John DeLoney]

That should have been mine after all I've done for you. And now that stuff starts and stuff.

[Dave Ramsey]

So you got to go ahead and just nip it in the bud. Nip it, nip it, Nip it in.

[John DeLoney]

I love what you say, Dave. If, if, if you need to have a hard conversation about your will, have the courage to do it while you're still alive.

[Dave Ramsey]

Don't be a coward.

[Caller]

Yeah. Ram.

When I talk to people on The Ramsey Show, 90% of the problems I hear come down to one thing. Not having a plan. They're not living on a budget. They have no idea where their money's going. Money is just happening to them instead of them happening to their money. And guys, that is so normal. But it doesn't have to be normal for you. And that's why I want you to go download our EveryDollar budget app. EveryDollar not only helps you tell your money where to go with a budget, it also builds a plan to free up extra money so you can pay debt off faster and start building wealth. And the best part, your plan is completely personalized to your life. It's the same advice that you would get if you call the show and it's right in your pocket. So don't keep living normal. Go download the EveryDollar app, answer a few questions, and get your plan. Today,

[Dave Ramsey]

The Ramsey show question of the day is brought to you by. Why refi? Defaulted private student loans don't fix themselves, but you. You can fix them. Why Refi helps you refinance into a low fixed rate payment that fits your budget so you can get back on the baby steps and move forward. Go to yrefi.com Ramsey that's the letter y r e f y.com Ramsey might not be in all states.

[John DeLoney]

Today's question comes from Brittany in Rhode Island. Brittany writes, my in laws are very wealthy, but they did not save a single dollar for their kids college expenses and they will leave them a large inheritance when they pass away.

[Caller]

Away.

[John DeLoney]

They've told my husband and his siblings to expect to each receive close to $4 million after they pass away. And my husband has over $40,000 in student loans. Should I be happy that my husband will receive an inheritance later in life instead of having help now? Or is it okay to be annoyed that this debt could have been avoided if they had planned for their college differently? All right, here's what I want you to do, Brittany. I want you to go outside in the garage and open the car door in the garage and put your hand in it and just slam the door repeatedly. Because that's about as useful as you spending one second of thought or energy or feelings over this matter. It just is what it is. What it is. They made a decision that they wanted their kids to pay for their own college and they get to do that. And because Dave, I guess she could be annoyed all she wants, but it's just a waste of time and energy and storage. You're about to be. You're about. You're gonna get $4 million when they pass away.

[Dave Ramsey]

Assuming you're still married.

[John DeLoney]

Yeah, exactly. Exactly. I, I don't know why anyone would spend a second of energy over this. His parents made a choice and they clearly have done well for themselves financially.

[Dave Ramsey]

When you married your husband, you knew he had $40,000 in student loan debt and you knew his mom and dad. You just didn't know the numbers around it. Yeah. So just love them where they are. Are they're your husband's parents and they're not. They don't do things the way you would do them. And welcome to in laws. And you know, no, it's not okay to be annoyed. Mind your own business.

[John DeLoney]

Yeah, yeah, that's a good. Mind your business.

[Dave Ramsey]

Mind your own business. You can take care of you and your husband and don't worry about what other people do. You spend all your time being annoyed about what somebody else should do. What if I had $4 million, this is what I would do. You don't have $4 million. So it's not a problem problem for you. And you don't get them. You don't get to make this Choice. So you make choices on, based on what you want to do in your future.

[John DeLoney]

And you don't know, Brittany, that his parents didn't have three friends whose parents paid for their college. And they watched their buddies do a bunch of drugs and, and get kicked out of school. And they told themselves from a place of value, we want our kids to have skin in the game when they go to college. And your husband chose to take out student loans instead of cash flow blowing it. And so if you're gonna be mad at somebody, be mad at him about it. But you don't know why they made the decisions they made. And they're about to give you all $4 million when they die. Relax.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah, well, I don't even care if you get that or not.

[John DeLoney]

Choose joy, man.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah, I'm just, just, this is work on. Controlling people that you can control, which is you. And there's one of them.

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Dave Ramsey]

It's the one in your middle mirror.

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah. And just move on. Oh my gosh. No, I, I, I, I think, I think, I think you got mother in law trouble and you're trying to get or give a logical reason why you're mad at your mother in law.

[John DeLoney]

See, I think she's got, she's pissed off that they have to pay back this.

[Dave Ramsey]

She's pissed off at her mother in law in general, and then this is, gives her a reason to be. Yeah, that's just, that's no.

[John DeLoney]

Handle your business and get on about your life. Be grateful. Go.

[Dave Ramsey]

Let it go. Frozen. Just let it go. Yeah.

[John DeLoney]

Dave's favorite movie and soundtrack, Glenn is in Anchorage, Alaska.

[Dave Ramsey]

Hey, Glenn, what's up?

[Caller]

Hey. So I am self employed and I have a variable income. So I was wondering how many years I should stay self employed if I notice with the economy that my income is not enough to save for retirement. Me.

[Dave Ramsey]

Well, the variable is not, not the problem. The problem is it's not enough. My income is variable, but I'm fine.

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Dave Ramsey]

So the problem is not variable. The problem is you don't make enough. Right?

[Caller]

Yes.

[Dave Ramsey]

I mean, you have a, you have an occasional, you have an occasional bonanza month and then the rest of the month are just dry beans. And the total is still not enough to let live on.

[Caller]

It's enough to live on, but not to put away for retirement.

[Dave Ramsey]

Well, that's living. You have to, you have to plan for retirement or you eat dog food. So I got a plan. I got a plan for retirement. That's part of living. So what do you make, what do you if you're self employed, so you file your taxes, what is the profit of the business that you pay taxes on each year?

[Caller]

So currently with the assets that I've.

[Dave Ramsey]

Assets are not profit. What is the profit of the business that your tax return would show me if I opened it up?

[Caller]

So taxes is showing a negative, but the like what goes in my bank account is. So last year was positive, 13,000 year before that, okay?

[Dave Ramsey]

The problem is you're living at the poverty level, sir. You need a job, okay? You're not making enough money to eat on. That's the thing. So if your income taxes are showing negative, there's a reason because you didn't make any money. And then what amounts to is you got some depreciation or something that you're taking and that allows you to cash flow 13k. But overall your assets are going down probably more than 13k or you wouldn't be getting that depreciation. So you're really not making a living. And if you can't see a way to triple that or quadruple that in the next two years, then you need to close the this and go get a physician where somebody will pay you 40, 50, $60,000 a year. You're gonna feel rich. If you had that happen, if you made a below average income, you'd feel rich compared to what you're making now. So it's not the volatility, it's the lack of income overall. And that's the thing you do. So my friend Henry Cloud wrote a book called Necessary Endings. He said we end something, a job, a business, a relationship, a whatever. We end something when we lose hope that it's going to get better in the future. And so if you're married to an alcoholic who you lose hope that they're actually going to get healed, that they're actually going to get dry and sober, you lose hope. Then you have to end that relationship because you can't continue to pour into the crazy world. In your case, you have to end this business because we've lost hope. For many years you've been doing this and for many years you've been starving to death doing it. And unless you really can tell me there's a reason that I'm going to make 40,000 and not 13,000, I'm going to make 50,000 and not 13,000 showing on my taxes that I really made that in real money, unless you see that, then you need to close this and get a job. And I think you probably need to close it and get a job. That's what it sounds like. It's tough to do though. Mark's in Greenville, South Carolina. Hey Mark, what's up?

[Caller]

Hey guys, thanks so much for taking the time to take my call. I've got a little bit of a question about income and kind of providing for my family for the future. Long story short, my wife and I are missionaries who have come off the field and we're transitioning back to the states. My wife is, we have two kids, 14 and 12. My wife is disabled and she's not really able to hold down a job consistently. But she's also unfortunately in a position where she doesn't qualify for disability. I just graduated from nursing school, did a two year program and I'll be starting a new job here and my take home pay every month is right around $4,000. We're able to live because of the generosity of a local ministry here that provides housing to missionaries who are transitioning to and from the field. So it's low cost rent basically so that we're able to kind of live as I look.

[Dave Ramsey]

Nursing school. Did you get an LPN and you passed your bars?

[Caller]

Rn? It's a registered nurse.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay, so why are you making so little? That's an 80,000 to a $95,000 a year job and you're making 48.

[Caller]

Well, it's about the highest offer I got. Which is the highest? The hospital system that pays the most is right about 70,000 a year. So start to start, correct? Yeah. And I'm brand new.

[Dave Ramsey]

That's not $4,000 a month, that's $7,000 a month minus taxes.

[Caller]

Right? Right. What? I, I only work 36 hours a week. So when you do the math at what it's like $35 an hour times 36 hours a week and then you factor in taxes, it's like $4,100 a month or something like that.

[Dave Ramsey]

The ground. The great news is you've entered a wonderful career. And if you keep pushing and growing your career, you're going to go up in income dramatically. You could be making 150 within the next three years. And in the meantime, you're going to end up renting for a little while and rebuilding your lives after the mission field. But you've got a good career field to win with. It's that time again, folks. Tax season is here. I know some of you would rather bury your head in the sand until April 15th than face your taxes, but here's a better idea. If your tax situation is complicated, get in touch with a Ramsey Trusted Tax Pro today. That way they can take the stress off your shoulders once those tax forms come in and teach you how to keep your tax form bill as low as possible. But don't wait. Ramsey Trusted Pros can book up fast. Go to ramseysolutions.com taxpro to find one who serves your area with excellence. That's ramseysolutions.com taxpro. Your personal and professional growth can hinge on this one thing as much as anything else. The one thing is communication skills. And the good news is that's a skill you can develop. That's why I'm excited about this new book that I've done called Stop Talking, Start Communicating. It's now available for pretty order and it's paired with the disc assessment. So it uses your results on the disc assessment to help you adapt your communication style so you can build trust and connection and influence. If you think about how other people are thinking, it helps you communicate directly to them. I took this disc 40 something years ago the first time and I took it home. I told Sharon, I said look at this thing. It's absolutely amazing. It's like she read it and she's like yeah, that's what's wrong with you. And I went no, that is me. And we use it here at the office when we're hiring people and we can walk up to someone's office and there's a discus their disc profiles on their wall right before you walk in so you know who you're talking to. So Pre order today $34.99 and you get $30 worth of pre order items which includes an extra assessment which is good for the spouse or friend and that kind of thing. So check it out. Ramseysolutions.com store stop talking, start communicating. Scott is in Atlanta. Hey Scott, are you.

[Caller]

Great.

How are you Dave?

[Dave Ramsey]

Better than I deserve. What's up? I see on my screen you're a baby steps millionaire, man. What's Your net worth?

[Caller]

4.3.

[Dave Ramsey]

Way to go man. Give me a little breakdown on that. How's that breakout category wise?

[Caller]

So 2.7 is retirement which is 400 ones. Mutual funds, Ross? 725 the house and then 918 and other mutual funds and some common stock.

[Dave Ramsey]

Cool. How old are you?

[Caller]

66.

[Dave Ramsey]

66. And how much of this 4.3 million did you inherit?

[Caller]

My wife and I each got around $20,000 when our parents passed away.

[Dave Ramsey]

Were you already millionaires when you got that?

[Caller]

Oh yeah. Yeah.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay, all right, cool. So you're not millionaires because of inheritance? Not even close. Yeah. So what was your career?

[Caller]

I was a salesperson.

[Dave Ramsey]

What about your wife?

[Caller]

She's a dental. Retired. Dental or both retired, but she's a dental hygienist.

[Dave Ramsey]

Gotcha. Okay. You have a four year degree?

[Caller]

I do. And a master's.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay, in what? Business?

[Caller]

Yeah. Mba.

[Dave Ramsey]

An mba. Okay. What was your gp? Gpa?

[Caller]

Well, in undergraduate it was not stellar. I'll. I'll admit to that. But in graduate school is 3.35.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay, 3.35. All right, cool. All right, so you're smart, but not a genius. Okay.

[Caller]

No.

[John DeLoney]

You had fun when you're at 19, like you're supposed to. Good for you.

[Dave Ramsey]

Good for you, man.

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Dave Ramsey]

So do you think that if. So you're 66. You're my age. I'm 65. If someone's out there, that's 25 and they're listening, do you think they can still become a millionaire starting from nothing like you did today?

[Caller]

You bet. You know, it's. It's pay yourself first, stay employed, stay invested.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay. Because you got over half. About 60 something percent of your net worth is in your retirement account.

[Caller]

Yes.

[Dave Ramsey]

You're worth $4 million. Your house is 725,000. Yeah, it's not 7, not 7.2 million house. It's $125,000 house in Atlanta, Georgia.

[Caller]

Well, I live in north Georgia, but. Yeah. In the UP and I live in.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah. So you have a nice home, but it is not a mansion.

[Caller]

No. And that when we built this house, we built during. COVID had no intentions of having that kind of house. It just. It turned into it because of rampant building costs for that two year period when we were building.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah, yeah. Okay. But the house is worth that now, easy. It's worth seven and a quarter now, right?

[Caller]

It is, yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Dave Ramsey]

All right, good. Good for you. Well done. Well done. Okay, so what advice would you have for your 25 year old self? You said that live, stay. Stay employed and keep investing. I heard. Think. I heard.

[Caller]

Yes. Stay employed. Pay yourself first. First get some term, you know, good term insurance.

[Dave Ramsey]

What do you drive?

[Caller]

Well, I just bought a brand new truck.

[Dave Ramsey]

What'd you buy?

[Caller]

I bought a UMC Denali.

[Dave Ramsey]

Oh, that's nice.

[Caller]

Yeah, we got our wife. All right, we got a. We got her on the pilot.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay, very good. Very cool. All right, so a GMC Denali and a Honda Pilot and you're worth $4 million. Good. Not a Lamborghini.

[Caller]

No, no. I've got a real fan. I'VE got a real fancy boat. It's a john boat.

[John DeLoney]

There we go. It's my favorite kind of boat. Hey, Scott, let me ask you this. You've been a salesman. Have you been a salesman your whole career?

[Caller]

More or less. I started it while I was in the army. You know, out of college. I went in the army.

[John DeLoney]

Okay.

[Caller]

I made a whopping and 12,000 a year right at that time, you know, again, that was.

[Dave Ramsey]

What's the most you ever made in your life in a year?

[Caller]

Family 200.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay.

[John DeLoney]

So when you're a first starting out salesman, you've got real good months and real tough months. How did you have the discipline or what mindset did you have to keep investing during those times? Because those would be times and I'd be tempted, especially when I'm younger, trying to support a family that I'm going to hold off. I got an up and down income, I'm going to hold off on the investing. I might put some in savings when I have a really good month. But you, you started investing early?

[Caller]

Yeah, I ran, believe it or not, as a young Lt. Templeton salesperson. Showed up at the, at the, in my quarters and sold me some life insurance, some term life insurance that I'd never heard of. And usually fun and, you know, and I was like, well, I don't play, I don't have any kids, I'm not married. But you know, if I. Something happens and I'm in the military, I'll give my parents something. And that sort of started the whole process, you know, the, the concept of monthly investments. And you know, over the 40 years it's been, you know, I've been to. We, Dave and I have been through a lot of, of downturns in the market and you just don't panic. Stay in.

[Dave Ramsey]

Absolutely.

[John DeLoney]

I love it, man. Congratulations.

[Dave Ramsey]

Congratulations, Scott. You're a baby steps millionaire and icon. You give inspiration to everybody out there listening that this still can be done. The great American dream is not dead. Stay off of TikTok, you know, and keep investing and keep employed. Keep investing and keep employed. I think he said that like four times times. You know, just keep working and keep investing and keep working and then you'll look up and you can do anything you want to do because you understand his income is off of these investments is $400,000 a year. And he, his highest income he ever made was 200,000.

[John DeLoney]

And to all the regular people, not the TikTok people, the regular people listening, I want you all to hear at four point, what 4.2, 4.2, $4.3 million a paid for house. House. Retired. They went to buy their fancy car and his wife got a Honda Pilot.

[Dave Ramsey]

Right.

[John DeLoney]

Like it's like you said, it's not this fancy BMWs and those aren't bad or wrong or anything but there is a sense of that's a family that has, is at peace with where they are and what they are.

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Dave Ramsey]

They want something reliable. And I'll guarantee you she got a Honda Pilot because it's grandma car.

[John DeLoney]

It's gonna be. Yeah. It's gonna be the car they drive for the rest of her life.

[Dave Ramsey]

Put the grandkids in. It's a lot of room.

[Caller]

Yeah.

[John DeLoney]

One of those grandkids is going to take that car one day.

[Dave Ramsey]

Probably.

[John DeLoney]

Probably that Denali will be on the side of the road by the end of the weekend. But I'm just kidding. I just need to make a GMC joke there.

[Dave Ramsey]

It didn't work.

[John DeLoney]

No, it's a great joke. It's a great truck.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah. So folks, the bottom line, the reason we bring the baby steps millionaires on here all the time is because 89% of America's millionaires, that's 9 out of 10 are millionaires not because of inheritance. 79% receive.05% received a small amount, like 5 or $10,000. Another 5% received a substantial amount but after they were already millionaires. In his case, in Scott's case, he received a small amount after he was already a millionaire. So he did get an inheritance. But 79, 5% is 89. That's nine out of 10. Millionaires are not millionaires because of inheritance. Inheritance, that's data. And if you don't agree with that fact, you're what's known as wrong. So quit telling people that they can't do this. Compound interest and self discipline and living on less than you make and living on a budget and being in agreement with your spouse actually freaking works. Hey guys, Dave Ramsey here. Every day on this show we help people work through real, real money problems and figure out what to do next. Now you can get that same kind of help anytime with Ask Ramsey. Ask your money question and get answers built on Ramsey principles we use on the show. Whether you're making a decision or just want something explained, ask Ramsey is here to help. It's fast, simple and free to use. Go to ramseysolutions.com and try AskRamsey text today. That's ramseysolutions.com. Our scripture of the day. Philippians 4:19 My God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus. Our friend Art Laffer says, I never heard of a poor person spending himself into prosperity, let alone, I've never heard of a poor person taxing himself into prosperity. There we go. Christopher is with us in Seattle. Hi, Christopher, how are you?

[Caller]

I'm doing good. How are you guys doing?

[Dave Ramsey]

Better than we deserve. What's up?

[Caller]

Hey. So my wife and I, our total household income is $201,000 and I am going to be running for a representative position in my district. And it does come with a $34,000 pay cut since I would be quitting my job, my current career. And so financially I know that we can do it. We're nearing the end of baby step three and my wife agreed that I should get involved locally in our political realm here. And I'm just struggling with the mindset of the fact that we are losing $34,000. And it feels like I'm in a way letting down myself and my family. So I'm just trying to figure out how to cope with that.

[John DeLoney]

Are you running for a representative seat because you want to see change and you want to be that change and you're want to get involved in your local community? Are you doing this to just because you hate working?

[Caller]

No, I absolutely love my job, but I do want to be a part of the change and to help motivate others and tell and let everybody know that it takes all of us to create this change.

[Dave Ramsey]

Let me ask you. I'm sorry, you're a representative of what level? The state level?

[Caller]

Yes.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay. Most state representatives have a full time job.

[Caller]

Oh, I was unaware of that.

[John DeLoney]

Almost everyone, if all the ones I know personally have full time jobs, I

[Dave Ramsey]

don't, they don't make much money and they have to. Now I don't know if that's true in the state of Washington or not.

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Dave Ramsey]

But you might want to investigate that. I'm not sure that a state representative is a full time job. Job.

[Caller]

Okay. I could definitely do that research then.

[Dave Ramsey]

I'm not sure. I mean, I know in our state, I know most of the representatives and a lot of them in our state, I know a whole bunch of them in our immediate area certainly. And all of them have jobs. They have to because they don't make much at the, at the state level.

[John DeLoney]

Christopher, you said you, does your wife make 170 and you make 35?

[Caller]

No, I make 101,000 and she makes. Make a hundred thousand pretty much.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay, so each of you make about a hundred but you're going to drop down to 65 if you take this role.

[Caller]

Yes.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay. All right.

[John DeLoney]

So I, I like the idea of bringing back. Just call me old fashioned public service. Being a service. It's when I'm going to, I, I at net loss to myself. I'm going to be in service to my community. And you've got your wife's support and backing.

[Dave Ramsey]

I mean, I think you have $165,000 household income.

[John DeLoney]

Yeah. Nobody, nobody's starving. I think this is a noble thing, choice you made.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah. And nobody thrust it upon you. You don't have to do it. So there's no reason to have to cope with it emotionally. If you, if it was like if you got demoted and you lost and you went from 100 to 65, you might have to emotionally cope with that loss.

[John DeLoney]

Or if your wife was a stay at home wife with three kids and, and this was going to put y', all, y' all couldn't pay your bills, then you'd have a hard decision to make.

[Dave Ramsey]

You have $165,000 income, net. Net. I don't know that there's anything to cope with.

[John DeLoney]

I would spend zero seconds coping and all of my energy on being the best public servant I could be and

[Dave Ramsey]

figuring out if this really is a full time job.

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Dave Ramsey]

That's the other thing. And I don't know what that means to your current career and those sorts of things.

[John DeLoney]

Let me, let me say it this way. If your identity is in a number you bring home versus value you provide to other people and in your relations, you have an issue. Whether you're like, you already have that issue. If you're, if your identity is, I make as much money as my wife or I make this many dollars, I make this magic number called six figures. And somehow that makes me better or I'm able to like myself more, you're going to have bigger issues across the board, brother.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah, yeah, that's true. Yeah. But I don't, I don't think that's what's going on. It was more like it was because he's really reaching to do something here that some awesome. Yeah, yeah. That's a noble call.

[John DeLoney]

Yeah. But if it clashes with this idea that I also have to make this much money or I'm not a good husband or a good man, I think that's, that's true. Lean into the service, man.

[Dave Ramsey]

That's fair. Josh is in Nashville. Hey, Josh, how are you?

[Caller]

Hey, Dave. I'm doing great.

[Dave Ramsey]

How are you doing better than I deserve. What's up?

[Caller]

Yeah, I was hoping you'd say that. Yeah. Hey, I recently moved to the Nashville area. I'm from Southern California. Like so many people here, like, I've met. And yeah, right when I moved here, I was sort of caught off guard by my business partner saying, hey, we should sell a business. And so something I wasn't really prepared for mentally or financially. So that's something I'm kind of working through right now. In addition to that, I'm also in the process of selling a bunch of our real estate. So most of our wealth right now is in real estate just to free up more cash. And I'm not sure I can do this, but I'm trying to understand if I can create the option to be work optional based on our assets. So just calling to see.

[Dave Ramsey]

So what will you get out of all the real estate and out of the sale of the business? What's the big number?

[Caller]

Yeah, so the business should net me about 1.5, and then the real estate another 2, and then I have so

[Dave Ramsey]

3.5,

[Caller]

and then I have about 500 in a taxable brokerage. And then one other potential source of liquidity could be our house. We have about a 2.3 million dollar house with a $700,000 note on it. So we could go downsize there as well.

[Dave Ramsey]

No, you could just pay off the note. Either one. All right, so you got like 3 million bucks to work with, give or take, depending on what we do with the house and the note. All right. Or 4 million, you know, so, you know, if you invest that in good growth stock mutual funds, the s and P500 has averaged 11.8% since it began. That's the stock market average, in other words. And so if you pulled off 10% off of $4 million, you'd have 400 grand. If you pull off 8%, you know, you'd have 320,000. What do you need to live.

[Caller]

Yeah, yeah. Right now, not. Not a whole lot. Maybe like $10,000. Not quite 10,000. Maybe $8,000 per month.

[Dave Ramsey]

Okay, so $120,000 a year, which is like your money still growing if it's invested in mutual funds and doing nothing but sitting there. That's if you don't do anything else with business and you don't do anything else with real estate.

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Dave Ramsey]

How old are you?

[Caller]

Part of my question. I'm 44.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yeah, well, you need to do something.

[Caller]

Yeah, yeah, no, I understand that.

[Dave Ramsey]

It's not fun. Life's not fun. I mean, you're not going to have fun if you don't something. You've been doing things your whole life now. Do you have to be stressed out and desperate? No, but I mean, you're an entrepreneur. You've grown businesses, you've built wealth. It's going to take you about 13 seconds to be bored.

[Caller]

I appreciate you saying that. Yeah. One of the things that's kind of playing around in my head is am I employable? Like, what could that look like to get a job? I haven't had a job since I was 24.

[Dave Ramsey]

I wouldn't.

[Caller]

Or 23.

[Dave Ramsey]

Last thing I would do, you know, I would just do consulting, work for somebody if, you know, show somebody how to do what you know how to do. Or I'd go build a business of some kind. Buy some, buy a business, start a business. Or I'd buy some other real estate. But you need to put your hand to something, you know, Otherwise you're just going to get fat and go fishing. And that's not a good plan. And so you're not going to be, you're not going to like yourself. So I just, you've been doing too much. Now again, you don't have to do 70 hours a week. 80 hours a week. But you don't need to be a Walmart grader, dude. I mean, that's not, that's not the stage. That's not who you are. And so don't do that. Don't set yourself up for that. But yeah, that's fine. Yes, you are work optional, but in terms of the actual arithmetic. But not your spirit. Spirit is not work optional. I don't find retirement in the Bible.

[John DeLoney]

No, I, I, I often tell folks who are older than you by a decade or two who are retiring, who are looking for, I don't know what to do next. Go spend two or three months at a local charity just showing up every day and serving people. And if you have the entrepreneurial mind now that you've had for the last 15, 20 years, you will spin up 15,000 ideas on people you can help and people you can love and business that will work to support those folks. And so that's what I would do.

[Dave Ramsey]

Yep. There's all kinds of things you can

[John DeLoney]

do, but you gotta have a purpose.

[Dave Ramsey]

Business that wins is always serving. Always. That puts this hour of the Ramsey show in the books. We'll be back with you before you know it. In the meantime, remember, there's ultimately only one way to financial peace, and that's to walk daily with the prince of peace. Christ Jesus.