Loading summary
Dave Ramsey
Foreign.
George Camel
To you by the Every Dollar app. Start budgeting for free today.
John DeLoney
Live from Nashville, Tennessee, it's the Ramsey show where we help people with their wealth, their jobs, their work, their relationships with just about everything. And I guess jobs and work are the same thing, James. So there you go. If you want to be on this show. We're taking live calls. 888-2525. I'm John DeLoney, joined by my great friend George Camel. And we're taking calls from all over the planet. 888-255-2225. Let's go out to Pennsylvania and talk to Nancy. What up, Nancy?
Caller
Hi, guys. How are you doing?
John DeLoney
Awesome. How are you?
Caller
I'm okay.
John DeLoney
So what you got?
Caller
Well, so I have a little financial problem. With what? To dad's house.
John DeLoney
All right, tell us about it.
Caller
Okay. So my mom just passed away in February.
John DeLoney
I'm sorry.
Caller
Thank you. And my father decided three months after my mom passed away to make a phone call to a woman that he hadn't had an affair with over 40 some years ago. And the problem is now they're in love.
Okay, how old is he?
85.
Okay, that answers my next question.
Yes.
Dave Ramsey
Wow.
Caller
So he's 85, mom passed away, and he immediately goes, I got the old flame over here. How old is this lady?
She is in her 70s.
Oh, she's young. Okay.
She's younger.
Perfect.
So my mom and dad were married 63 years and this is like a major shock to me. I knew of two affairs that my dad had had in my mind. I assumed they were one night stands. Didn't know that this particular affair had gone on for years.
John DeLoney
How do you know this?
Caller
He spilled the beans to me, told me everything. It's been a total nightmare. And the question now is, you know, he wants to move this woman into my mom's house, wants to marry her. And he said she is not interested in the house and that he'd be willing to sign it over to my brother and I if we would pay off his reverse mortgage.
This is a terrible idea.
John DeLoney
Stay as far away from this as possible.
Caller
Really? I love this house.
John DeLoney
I. I know. But here's the thing. Every single part of the story has been about you. And your pain is real and your heartbreak is real. And the loss of your mom is real. And finding out like secrets from your parents marriage past is real. All that's real.
Caller
Yeah.
John DeLoney
And you referred to his house as your mom's house. That sentiment and that feeling is real in your chest. It's not real on paper. Okay. And so getting in the middle of his chaos, of his desperation, of his, I mean, he pulled out a reverse more like I, I, he's not, he's not trustworthy is what I would say. And I'm not saying like he's had his past issues with infidelity. I'm saying he's not trustworthy. Maybe a better way to say that is he is not reliable. He's making very impulsive choices.
Caller
Yes, he is. But I can't lose this house.
John DeLoney
Why not?
Caller
Is it because the connection to your mom?
The thought of somebody else in there?
So you're wanting to live in this house or are you just going to keep it one day and rent it out?
Yes, I would keep it and rent it out.
So some strangers just gonna live in your mom's house and destroy it, you're okay with that?
I would rather a stranger be in there than this woman.
This feels like now a vengeful tactic to just take the house so that he doesn't have it and this woman doesn't have it.
John DeLoney
And you're not gonna evict your dad? Your 85 year old father?
Caller
No, no. They would live there, I guess, like right now?
John DeLoney
Of course.
Caller
So you're the landlord of this.
John DeLoney
Yeah.
Caller
To your 85 year old dad and his mistress.
John DeLoney
Okay, can I, can I tell you something? Can I, Let me tell you this, Nancy. So this is something that happened a few years ago. I was moved. I was moving to a new house and I had all of these, I was moving all my suit jackets back in my former nerd world, I used to wear suits every day. And I had.
Caller
Not well, by the way, not well, not well.
John DeLoney
I looked incredible. My wife actually says she misses old suit and tie wearing guy. Not dorky teenager YouTuber guy. But that's, that's a whole other story. So I have a jacket. When I started working in higher ed, my granddad, the greatest man I've ever known, gave me an old tweed coat of his and said, this looks like a professor coat. Had the patches on the elbows and everything. It has never one time fit me, ever. And I always kept it right. And I moved it house to house to house. And I was going through clothes that don't fit and what doesn't fit and what works and yada yada. And I ran across this jacket. I smiled, I tried to put it on again for the 50th time, it still didn't fit, fit. And I put it in the keep pile, right? And for the first time I stopped and I Picked that jacket back up and I looked in it and I said to myself out loud, my grandfather's not in this jacket. And I put my fist in my chest and I said, he's right here.
Caller
Right.
John DeLoney
And I put that jacket in the giveaway pile so somebody could wear it.
Caller
Right. I, I, I understand that. I also.
John DeLoney
Here'S what's going to happen. I'm telling you right now. Your emotions and your vengeance is going to get you in a situation that's going to be very uncomfortable to get out of.
Caller
Right. This, this house, though the property that this house is on, it's possible that somewhere down the line it might be worth more. There's a developer coming through and building homes.
John DeLoney
Do you want to be in the land development business?
Caller
No.
John DeLoney
Okay.
Caller
And you're, you're trying to justify it on the financial side and the emotional side, and I get that. But if we're going to talk finances, let's talk about the fact that you're going to lose the step up in basis. So you're going to get your dad's original cost basis, which could mean a huge tax bill.
Okay.
But if he deeds it over to you as part of an inheritance when he passes away, then it'll step up in basis, meaning if the house is now worth 500,000, you would inherit it at that price. But if you, if he deeds it over now while he's still alive, what did he buy it for?
John DeLoney
50?
Caller
Yeah, probably.
I mean, what's it worth now?
It's, it's, it was appraised at like, about 500,000.
John DeLoney
Exactly. I would rather him do a prenup with this new wife of his.
Caller
Okay.
John DeLoney
That says she can't touch any of his existing assets.
Caller
Okay.
That's the better move.
Okay.
And you inherit this house after he passes. That's the smart way to do it. I would work with an estate planning attorney and work through this whole thing with logic and facts and contracts and try to remove yourself as best you can from the anger you're feeling, which is understandable towards your father and his decisions.
Okay.
John DeLoney
And I'm gonna say something ugly, but it's true. Okay.
Caller
Yeah.
John DeLoney
This is not your home.
Caller
I know.
John DeLoney
Okay. And so the owner of the home can do whatever the owner wants. What you get to do is choose what type of involvement you want to have with his decisions.
Caller
I know, but. But what if my mom would want.
John DeLoney
Me to have that house?
Caller
Yes.
John DeLoney
Okay, then tell him that, because George is right. I don't want you paying taxes on $450,000.
Caller
Okay, that makes sense.
John DeLoney
I would much rather you get the house in full when he's done with it. Or if he wants to sell it to you at 50,000, his original purchase price. Maybe he can do that, I guess. But. And this is for everybody listening, emotions are real and feelings are powerful and they're not designed to tell us the truth. They're designed to keep us safe. And if you feel emotional about something, you're about to rush in. Get some wisdom from somebody else who's detached from a situation so you can make the next right move.
George Camel
You know, one of the first things I discovered working in the financial world is how absolutely devastating it is when the breadwinner of a family dies and there's too little life insurance or none at all. Grieving families are suddenly left behind, scrambling to pay bills and trying to make ends meet. I also discovered that there are a lot of rip offs in the life insurance world. Like that whole life crap posing as an investment opportunity. What you need is level term life insurance, usually 10 to 12 times your income, which is the smartest, most affordable way to protect your family. The key is finding an independent broker who represents a ton of companies and works for you, not for the insurance company. This is exactly what my friend Jeff Zander and his team at Zander Insurance are all about. They shop the term life companies to find you the best options. And they've been around for over 95 years, so you know they'll be there when you need them. Zander is the real deal and that's why they've handled all my personal insurance for over 25 years. I trust them and you can too. Visit Zander.com for instant online quotes or for a more personal touch, give them a call at 800-356-4282.
John DeLoney
Let's go out to Houston and talk to Donald. What's up, Donald?
Dave Ramsey
Hi.
John DeLoney
How's it going?
Dave Ramsey
How's it going?
John DeLoney
I'm great. How about you?
Dave Ramsey
I'm good.
John DeLoney
Alright, what's up man?
Dave Ramsey
Okay, so me and my girlfriend have been dating for five years and I'm looking to get engaged soon. So I'm looking at engagement rings and I'm kind of between lab grown or a natural diamond. And it's. The difference is a natural would be 70,000 and lab grown would be closer to 10,000.
Caller
Run, bro.
Dave Ramsey
Are you.
Caller
Blink twice if you're okay, Donald.
John DeLoney
You're right.
Dave Ramsey
Yeah, I'm okay.
Caller
Whose Idea was a $70,000 ring?
Dave Ramsey
That's my idea. Definitely not her.
Caller
What do you make a year?
Dave Ramsey
I make around $80,000 for my salary and around 200,000 from my dad's business. Own some shares in it.
Caller
Wait, so you're paid 200,000 a year from those shares? Like dividends.
John DeLoney
Dividends, yeah.
Dave Ramsey
200,000 in dividends a year? Yeah.
Caller
Okay. Very confused. Either way, this is an insane ring. You know that, right?
Dave Ramsey
Yeah.
Caller
Does she have expectations? Like, has this been the relationship thus far?
Dave Ramsey
Oh, no, definitely not.
John DeLoney
Why would you do this? It seems like a guy that has, like, a small sedan that drops it really low and puts a muffler that sounds like this on it.
Caller
That was actually a great impression.
Dave Ramsey
Hey, I only had that car for around five years.
John DeLoney
I knew you had one. Why would you. Why would you spend 70? Like, why. What are you. What are you trying to. Who are you trying to prove?
Dave Ramsey
I don't know what to do with all this money I have. It's got. How much do you have in my pocket? I have around a million dollars in liquid assets. Wow.
Caller
Do you own a home?
Dave Ramsey
No, I don't.
John DeLoney
Yeah, you should buy. You should buy a ring for sure, definitely. Instead of a home. That's a good move.
Caller
Can you live inside of the ring?
Dave Ramsey
Well, actually, I don't have any living expenses right now. I'm kind of living in a vacation home for my parents right now. And.
Caller
Okay, so money is. Money is a fake object to you. It's just. It's monopoly money, essentially. So, like, you spending 70 grand, like, who cares? Not really. My.
John DeLoney
I don't believe you. There's no way. You just have a million dollars in cash sitting in a checking account.
Dave Ramsey
You're like, no. So it's around almost half a million in the S P 500 between two different funds. I have around 250 in high yield savings and around 300. And, like, kind of my. I have an account in the business that gets as kind of used as business funds, so I get paid interest off of that, too.
Caller
Okay, well, you're. You're doing well for yourself. I don't know how much of it was on your own volition and effort, but I'm not. I'm not mad that you have family money, but I do still think it's insane to spend $70,000 on a ring, regardless of. Of your wealth. Now, if you were, like, a billionaire, like, all right, whatever. But you don't even own a home. You're living in mom and dad's vacation rental. And so I think if I'm this woman, I would rather have a home than a $70,000 object on my hand that I'm worried about every time I leave the house because I'm gonna get murdered or robbed.
John DeLoney
Yeah, Yeah. I don't know. This isn't passing the smell test for me, but, I mean, if you have a million dollars laying around, brother, do whatever you want to. I just think $70,000 is insane.
Caller
You'll live to tell the tale, but she's gonna keep it in the divorce. Let me just put that out there. So I just. I have fears for the future of you two. I don't know how much she knows about your wealth and how much you've amassed, but I think you're setting an expectation that this is the kind of lifestyle we're always going to live no matter what. And that part worries me.
John DeLoney
Let's go to Crystal in Chicago. What's up, Crystal?
Caller
Hi, guys. Thanks for taking my call.
John DeLoney
You got what's up?
Caller
So, okay, I. Back in November, I was involved in a car accident. I was coming home from work and this young man was flying down the highway. He hit me, flipped me three times, and, you know, fortunately I survived.
John DeLoney
Are you okay?
Caller
Yes. By the grace of God, I walked away with just a scratch on my hand and can't even Harley see anymore.
John DeLoney
Dude, I'm so glad you're okay.
Dave Ramsey
Wow.
Caller
That makes two of us. So from the settlement. So after it was $80,000, once the lawyers took their cut and the bills were paid, I was left with $32,880.37. And I have my debt. $53,242 is what I owe out. But as of right now, the beer that I had to purchase in order to get from home to work just went out on me yesterday. And I need a car. I also need a new soft water system for my house. And I just don't know what to do if I should save some of this money and pay towards some of my bills and pay towards some of my debts.
John DeLoney
Yeah, well, we'll walk you through it. George will walk you through the numbers. I just want to say this. I've never received a lump sum check for 80 grand, right? But every time I've ever got a commission check or sold something and I'm holding money in my hand, the amount of quote, unquote needs I have multiplies all over the place. And so the temptation you have is to keep going back to that 80,000 number, even though you're only holding 30, and to suddenly, quote, unquote, need a nicer, newer car, Need A water softening system, need new clothes, need a savings account. Like you're gonna need all this stuff and that money's gonna evaporate for the day's over. And so the challenge you have before you is a very disciplined response. Not thinking like I won the lottery, but thinking I have a chance to get ahead or not even ahead, but at least get caught up on how underwater I've been living my life. Thank God I'm alive and get another sh. Thing I'm going to do this version right. And so, man, you got a shot here. So, George, you can walk her through it.
Caller
Yeah, I would. I would be force ranking the priorities. Obviously the biggest priority is getting out of debt, but you have a real need for transportation right now. And to John's point, the temptation is, well, I. My beater died, so I might as well get a $25,000 car and a water softener and then the money's gone. And so I would get a reasonable car if. Is this thing worth fixing? When you say beater, is it like, hey, 2,000 bucks in repairs, we'll get this thing running for another two years? Or is this a transmissions out and it wasn't worth much to begin with?
It wasn't worth much to begin with. It was. I got it. It's a 2003 Honda Accord and I paid 2,700 for it. I just was trying to get something to get to and from work. And I was. I'm not looking to get a brand new car, not at all. But I was looking at maybe 15,000 from like a CarMax or something.
John DeLoney
But I would say seven.
Caller
Seven.
What do you make?
Well, I do pretty okay. My salary is $95,852 a year. But, you know, I have my mortgage. I had. I'm a single mom of one and it just seems like everything every year had something major happen. You know, both my parents passed.
And guess what?
Dave Ramsey
There's.
Caller
There's always going to be another thing that's going to happen. And that's why you should be paramount to get out of debt and get an emergency fund asap. Especially as a single mom, you need stability more than anyone. And so I would get yourself a reasonable car. Seven to ten thousand dollars. What is the. The need for the water softener? Is it a health thing, a safety thing, or is it more of a want?
Well, no, in the area in which we live, we have more hard water. So it would just be for the washing of the clothes and to keep the pipes from rusting. And things like that.
So is this like a whole house filtration system? Like $4,000. What are we talking?
Yes, yes. So I did get in touch with a plumber and he was so kind, he's willing to do it for me. 1,500 from start to finish.
Okay.
So I have been kind of looking and pricing that out.
So let's say 8500 on a car for now, 1500 on the water softener. That leaves you with 22 to throw at the debt, which brings your total debt down to about 21,000 or 31,000 left. What kind of debt is that? 53.
Overall. Outside of the house, it is student loans, credit cards, medical bills, and dental.
You got a whole bunch of potpourri debt here and you're making six figures. And so we've got to figure out how to control the money that we have coming in. And this inheritance will give you a boost, but it's not going to be the savior that you thought it would be. So we got to make a plan, and I'm going to gift that to you. It's called Every Dollar. It's a budgeting app that will change the game for you. So hang on the line, we'll send that over to you so you can get out of this mess. Get some stability.
George Camel
Buying a home these days can be a real dog eat dog situation. Just when you think you've found the right house, somebody else swoops in with a better offer. So you need an edge Home buyer Edge from Churchill Mortgage can help you win against the competition with the ultimate triple threat for home buyers. One, your pre approval is handled by real humans, not just a computer. So you're positioned like a cash buyer, even without the cash. Two, Sellers love a sure thing. So Churchill backs your offer with a $10,000 seller guarantee. If your loan falls through, the seller gets $10,000, which takes away their fears about financing and gives them another reason to say yes to your offer. And three, Churchill secures your rate for 90 days so you don't have to worry about the interest rates going up while you find the right home. It doesn't cost you anything extra. And if rates drop, so does yours automatically. With home buyer Edge from Churchill, you're not just another buyer. You're a top contender. Go to Churchillmortgage.com to arm yourself with the ultimate home buying edge. Today, that's Churchill Chill mortgage dot com.
John DeLoney
This is a paid advertisement. Home buyer Edge and seller guarantee are available for qualifying borrowers and select loan types only.
Caller
And are not available in all states or locations.
John DeLoney
NMLS ID 1591 nmlsconsumeraccess.org/housing lender welcome back to the Ramsey Show. Hey, take two seconds and hit the subscribe button. If you're watching us on YouTube or if you're listening to us on podcast or on one of the streaming services, just take a second and subscribe to the show. Like it. Leave a five star review. Even if you're feeling generous. Those tiny little things, they don't cost any money. It takes two seconds to do it. But it makes a huge difference for the show. It kicks it up in the algorithms and the techno overlords. Like give it the show to more people. And what the world needs right now is some hope and an actual plan to help with their money because we're not getting that anywhere else. So just take a second, do that and we'd be super grateful. Let's go out to Knoxville, Tennessee and talk to John. What's up, John?
Dave Ramsey
Hey, guys, thanks for so much for taking my call.
John DeLoney
You got it, brother. What's up?
Dave Ramsey
Well, I've got a bit of a goalpost I'm chasing. That's my. The root issue. Kind of a long story short, my grandfather. No Hank Football beyond.
John DeLoney
I was trying to make a goal.
Dave Ramsey
Post joke of all this orange.
John DeLoney
That was well played, man. You're gonna get struck by lightning for that, but ok. Okay. All right. So I know. Tell me about your granddad.
Dave Ramsey
Well, my, my grandfather, he went to his forever home back in May and I, I received the inheritance and he passed away. That's right.
John DeLoney
Okay.
Dave Ramsey
They said there's only one forever home and I believe that. So that's where he's at. And I received about a $50,000 inheritance. I'm also $50,000 in debt. I know the answer. The number answer is to just pay off the debt, turn around and start saving up for a home. His wishes was to not do that. He wants me to use it to buy a home because he saw in his last, you know, years how expensive homes are getting. And sure enough, yeah, if he, if I would have received this two years ago, I would have been able to afford a home. But the homes that that would help me as a down payment on now are all decrepit and falling apart. So should I go ahead and get a house now and continue paying off debt with income or do you guys think I'd be safe to wait another year to save that back up as a down payment and houses be even more outrageous next year?
Caller
Do you have a crystal ball.
Dave Ramsey
Yeah, just what I've been watching. My wife and I used to own a home back in 2019. And that house, we turned around and sold it for double what we paid for it in only a couple of years. And every house we could afford two years ago is now out of reach. So it just. It keeps going that way.
John DeLoney
You're right. There's two ways you can look at this, dude. You can look at it as, regardless of situation, you on the way home, somebody pulls out in front of you and hit your car, and you break your leg, and you've got medical bills. And your grandfather said, no, this money is for a house. And so, like, no matter what, you can look at it that way. And that's the letter of the law. That's what he said. Or you can get to the spirit of what your grandfather was trying to get for you, which is, I want my grandson to have what? Peace. I want my grandson to have a place where he can drop his shoulders and exhale.
Caller
To own something.
John DeLoney
To own something.
Caller
And right now, the lenders own you, man.
John DeLoney
That's right.
Caller
And so that 50k, it does get you closer to the house. If you use it to pay off.
John DeLoney
Debt, it frees you.
Caller
Because what happens is. Let's play it out. You'll be the next caller on the show who goes, hey, I'm $50,000 in debt and I have a house that was way too much. It was way more than I could chew. I had no emergency savings. What do I do? Should I sell the house?
John DeLoney
Or now I need a roof.
Caller
Well, that's not gonna make grandpa happy either, if you're broke and stressed. And so this sets you up to buy a house. So whether the money goes temporarily to debt payoff so that you can be in a position to buy a house or that goes to the house now, I think the better move is to set yourself up to where this house is a blessing and not a burden. That's what grandpa wants. He just doesn't see your life as it is. Did he know that you have 50 grand in debt? Do you know the financial stress you were under?
Dave Ramsey
Yes. What it is is 40,000 of a student loan, which my wife's getting her master's, so that's been interest free. Pause. Thankfully, her school is paying for the masters and then a $9,000 Toyota. That's just my worker commute. But he. He sees right Now I'm paying 1500amonth in rent. He wants me to pay 1500amonth for a House. One's an investment. One is paying my landlady. Landlady's mortgage.
John DeLoney
I know, but here's the thing.
Dave Ramsey
Math I understand, but the emotion.
Caller
One has risk and one gives you flexibility. And so right now, renting is buying you patience because you don't need to cover all the repairs and maintenance and all the headaches that come along with it. And that's allowing you to focus on this debt payoff.
John DeLoney
What.
Caller
What's your household income?
Dave Ramsey
Right now, we're between 5,900, 6,000amonth.
Caller
And what are your total minimum payments on all these debts? The 50k in debt.
Dave Ramsey
The loan is paused, but it's going to be about 400amonth. The car is 200amonth.
Caller
So 600amonth is what you'll free up if you paid off your debt today.
Dave Ramsey
That's right.
Caller
And then how much can you throw on top of that towards the savings to get this emergency fund in place and eventually a down payment?
Dave Ramsey
Probably about a thousand.
Caller
So your monthly expenses are about 5,000amonth?
Dave Ramsey
That's right.
Caller
And there's no wiggle room there.
Dave Ramsey
There is. There is. I'm sure I could find another 500.
Caller
Or so because that tells me you're going to save at most 12 grand in a year. Would you agree? For a couple making six figures, that's not super impressive.
Dave Ramsey
That's right.
Caller
So what if we said, hey, we're going to free up 600 bucks plus save two grand a month? Now we're talking. That's 2,600amonth we're saving. That'll get you to an emergency fund and a down payment real fast. Because what I don't want, in the spirit of your grandfather's wishes, is for you to wait and go. Well, the housing market kept shifting. We never got that down payment. The housing market kept moving. And it takes you nine years to save up a hundred grand.
John DeLoney
Or you blame your grand, you go buy a house you can't afford or in a situation you can't afford, and then you're gonna end up blaming your granddad on it. Can I tell you what I'm hearing? And you feel free to push back on me, okay? Because I'm wrong all the time. I'm okay being wrong. Is that okay?
Caller
All right.
John DeLoney
I hear a guy who is really pissed off at how expensive houses have gotten in the area where he lives. And I hear a guy who's really upset that him and his wife are doing pretty well. She's in grad school. You're making decent Money. And y' all can't even buy a house. And there's an anger in you. There's an emotion in you that is. Shot you out of a cannon and you're about to set yourself up for a huge mess.
Dave Ramsey
That's why I'm calling in.
John DeLoney
That's right. Like, here's the thing. There's a. There's. You're the guy at the bar, man, and somebody just bumped into you, and you can set your drink down and hit that guy and go to jail, or you can just walk out. And I guess me and George are the guy next to you saying, dude, let's just go. Let's just go. And let's wake up tomorrow and be like, dude, I would have totally worked him. But you know what? You're not in jail. You woke up in your own bedroom. That's. That's what we're saying, man. I want you to have a house. George wants you to. We all want you to have a house. Your granddad wants you to have a house. But I promise you, I promise you, your granddad did not want you chained to banks.
Dave Ramsey
Absolutely.
Caller
So if the house represents freedom to grandpa, then you getting out of debt is the best thing you can do to actually get to the root of what he was wanting, which is that freedom. That's what we're solving for.
John DeLoney
And can I be mad with you? It's stupid that we've had these policies and we can go into them all day long, but that we're here where we are, that there's not enough houses for hard working people like you and your wife that are. That are cheap enough for you to get in and have a great life. That's. It's not what we all signed up for. And yet I have a family member that basically lives in the desert, whose house got flooded with that flood in Texas a few weeks ago. Like, it's not supposed to happen. And yet here we are. So what we're doing is we're gonna go pull all the Sheetrock out and take all the kitchen cabinets over and start over. And that's where you are, right? It's like, it's. I don't want this to happen. I. You're right to be mad, you're right to be angry, you know, but don't make the next wrong decision based off that. That atmosphere. Does that make sense?
Dave Ramsey
Oh, it absolutely. Shout out while I got second.
John DeLoney
Do what, brother Do I wonder if.
Dave Ramsey
I can give a shout out. Today's my 10 year wedding anniversary and I know My wife's listening, want to say I love you.
John DeLoney
That's amazing. Congratulations. And wife. Listen to him. He's fighting for a house for you. He wants you to have a home. And I know you're like, why don't.
Dave Ramsey
We have a home?
John DeLoney
He's trying, he's trying to figure it out.
Caller
Fight with him, fight with him.
John DeLoney
Not, not against him. And I'm telling you, man, houses can be amazing when they're not a burden to you. And if you owe 50 grand in debt, plus you still got somebody in grad school, plus you go try to buy a house that you're barely going to be able to get into, it's just going to become a nightmare. Don't do it. Just wait and let this frustration and anger don't force you into the wrong next decision, but force you towards we're going to go save up this money so we can get ourselves a house.
George Camel
These days, business as usual is anything but. Tariffs make trade policy a moving target. Supply chains are squeezed and cash flow is probably tighter than ever. So if your business can't adapt in real time, you're in a world of hurt. That's why you need NetSuite by Oracle, trusted by more than 42,000 businesses, including Ramsey Solutions. You need to see what's happening, what's stuck and what's costing you and how to fix it. And NetSuite is the number one cloud based business management suite because it helps your business make the right decisions fast. It brings accounting, financial management, inventory and HR into one place so you're not left shuffling a dozen different spreadsheets. That gives you the visibility you need to make quick decisions based on actionable data. And NetSuite AI automates everyday tasks so your team can focus on strategy. It's one system for full control and no guesswork to tame the chaos. And right now, if you're leading a business doing more than a million dollars in annual revenue downlo NetSuite's free ebook navigating global trade. Three insights for leaders@netSuite.com Ramsey that's NetSuite.com Ramsey.
John DeLoney
The Ramsey Show Question of the day is brought to you by. Why Refi feeling stuck with defaulted private student loan payments? Why Refi can reduce your payments and help you regain control of your finances? Take the first step towards getting unstuck. Visit yrefi.com Ramsey that's the letter y r e f y.com Ramsey and you may not be able to do this in all states.
Caller
Today's question comes from Carissa In California, my in laws plan to leave their house to all four of their children.
John DeLoney
Oh, gosh, don't do that.
Caller
Sounds simple. Currently, three of the children live with them, including my spouse and me. We are planning to move out in a few months as we're saving for a home of our own and hoping to start a family soon. They've made it clear that to remain included in the will for the house, we would be required to stay living with them longer. What's your advice on navigating the situation both financially and relationally?
John DeLoney
Fly like an eagle.
Caller
Yeah, I'm out. And for those reasons, I'm out.
John DeLoney
Yes. What a weird.
Caller
You gotta live with us longer to stay, Felicia.
John DeLoney
Bye, Felicia. Run, run, run, run. Go, go, go.
Caller
What does longer mean?
John DeLoney
That. That just means I'm gonna dangle this dollar bill over your head and you have to do what I say.
Caller
What in the toxic codependency is going on here, John?
John DeLoney
Not to mention, if you stay in this situation, four of y' all are gonna have to fight over this house.
Caller
This feels like a terrible reality show.
John DeLoney
It does. Yeah. It's like.
Caller
It's like Love Island. No Islander. No and no love.
John DeLoney
You're stuck here now. Like. Yeah, I would if this was me and my spouse, me and my wife. Now, if this is a five million dollar house and we stood, there's a lot.
Caller
Maybe I would have a contract saying all four kids agree that this house will get sold correct.
John DeLoney
Upon their passing, the moment it passes. Right.
Caller
Because no one's going to be able to afford to buy them all out. So that means we're all going to be living together in some sort of.
John DeLoney
Commune or we're all going to like pitch in money every month to keep it going so we can all use it.
Caller
We're going to rent it out and we're all going to collect. Now that's complicated.
John DeLoney
I would do what's best. And this is part of growing up, up. I would do what's best for me and my family. I would get with my wife, or in this case, yeah, with. With her husband. And we're gonna make a decision on what's best for us. And if it's best for us to stay right now for whatever reason. Seems like there's a lot of you in that house, but if that's what's best for y' all right now, great. We're gonna revisit it in three months. We already have the date on the calendar and the breakfast place where we're gonna go meet. And then we'll do it for another three months. But I'm not going to let somebody dangling something over my head control my life.
Caller
It's that simple. The only part I like about this is that they at least have a will.
John DeLoney
I know.
Caller
Good on them. Good. Good for you. Getting a will. Having the conversation while they're still alive about what their plans are so there's no confusion in fights later on. The fights can happen now.
John DeLoney
Yes.
Caller
I like it that way. Right in front of you.
John DeLoney
And Dave always says that, like, if you're gonna put somebody in your will or take somebody out of your will, have the courage to say it to their face.
Caller
Yeah, yeah. We just had to redo our will. You know, we did mirror wills that kind of pour over wills, and it was really. It's. It's crazy because you have these. You have to have these conversations to talk to my in laws and sister in law and brother and say, hey, are you okay? Being financial power of attorney, medical power of attorney. Would you take care of our kids if something were to happen to both of us? And so the will is simple. The conversations can be difficult.
John DeLoney
Yep.
Caller
But you got to have them. It's so worth it. And I sleep better at night knowing it's done. Because here's the truth. Two thirds of Americans die without a will. Here's what that means. You're saying, I trust the government to decide what happens with all of my stuff. Yikes.
John DeLoney
Or as my friend John says, if you die without a will, it's because you hate your family.
Caller
There it is.
John DeLoney
Because you hate your wife and kids or you hate your spouse. Like, it's just, let's have the courts.
Caller
The lawyers, and the public enter the most personal parts of our life. That's, that's fun. So don't let the government decide what happens to your state or even worse, your children. I want to challenge you guys to create your will in August if you haven't already. Or maybe you thought you did, but you're not sure, or you kind of halfway did it, but it was never finalized because in less than five minutes, you can find out if an online will works for you. Go to ramseysolutions.com wills quiz or click the link in the description if you're listening on YouTube or podcast. And if you do find out that an online will fits your situation, you can get 25% off. That's the best deal I've seen on this. Use promo code. Will month. That's one word. Will month at checkout during the month of August, go check it out. Ramseysolutions.com wills quiz promo code Will month. Get it done. Just get it done.
John DeLoney
Yeah, I, I rarely say this, George. This is one of those few things that is inexcusable. Like I, you know, I work with people with traumatized situations a lot and I. There's behaviors that are, are bad. There's actions people take that are detrimental to their life. Usually I can sit down with somebody and walk through it and say, okay, I see how you got here. Right? This is inexcusable. Get a will. Just get a will.
Caller
Tomorrow's not promised. So if you go, well, I'll do that later when I'm older.
John DeLoney
Get a will. Is it uncomfortable? Yes. Do you have to have hard conversations? Yes, but get a will. Let's go out to Ontario, Canada and talk to Sean. What up, Sean?
Dave Ramsey
Hey, how's it going?
John DeLoney
We're doing all right, brother.
Dave Ramsey
So I am looking for a little bit of advice here. I. I'm about to start building a house for my family and we had originally done the plans up a coup years ago, and we are just rethinking a few things. The original plan was to build a larger house to accommodate my in laws to be living with us. They made a series of poor financial decisions in the past, and we predict that in the near future they will most likely be living with us. However, we were raised as. My wife and I were raised as Jehovah's Witnesses and we recently left that organization to follow Christ. Her parents and my parents don't agree with our choices. And because of that, we are obviously, if you know anything about that organization, were shunned. So they're kind of doing a soft shunning because I haven't been formally kicked out. I've managed to keep that that way. But we are still just trying to plan for the future because we're thinking they are still going to need a place to live whether they want our help or not. And I'm just wondering if we should be doing that or if we should be focusing more on building a smaller, more affordable house. And that kind of brings me to the financial side. We just sold our house. I just actually finished building, and we got about $400,000 profit from that. And I'm using that $400,000 profit to build the next house. And once that house is built, it'll be worth about two, two and a half million, depending on the market. The reason there's such a large return on investment is because I'm physically doing all the Work myself. I'm not hiring out sub trades, so we save a lot of money on that.
John DeLoney
Okay, so let's get, let's get to the question. We're going to run out of time here. Okay, sorry. We'll get to, we'll get to the finance question there if we can get to it. As for your parents and your in laws or whatn y' all are making A some big suppositions about their life. B, you are already pre planning to the tune of hundreds of thousands of dollars to help somebody that A hasn't asked for your help, B is appearing to not want your help and doesn't.
Caller
Even want a relationship with you.
John DeLoney
Correct. And so what I would, I'm telling you, having done this experiences, had this conversation a jillion times with different people, sit down and have a grown up conversation. You're a grown man. And if they can't have the conversation or won't have that conversation, then that is your answer. Like literally, I am building a house. We are considering adding a space for y' all to move in if and when y' all need to. Is that something you would be interested in?
Dave Ramsey
So it's not so much that I think that they would even be interested in it. Just from past experience. We personally had to help them move out of their house that they lost. And because we told them to stop doing what they're doing, they moved out of our house once they lost their house and moved in with my wife's grandparents. My wife's grandparents are aging and once they're gone, I don't know how they're going to afford to stay in that house.
John DeLoney
I know, but listen to me, brother.
Caller
You're trying to solve all of their.
John DeLoney
Future problems and they are repeatedly telling you we don't want your help, we don't want it.
Dave Ramsey
Yeah, I see what you're saying. I just can't stomach not trying.
Caller
I get it. You see the train coming and you see them on the tracks and you're like, hey, get out of the way. And they're like, nah, we're good.
John DeLoney
And you've tried to push them off the track, you've tried to pull them off the track, you've tried to invite them off the track and they're telling you leave us alone.
Dave Ramsey
Yeah.
John DeLoney
And so if I'm you, I would probably put some money in an account because I see the train coming and I'm at least gonna have to help with the aftermath of this situation. But I wouldn't add a million dollar wing to a Property. I'm not gonna use their potential challenges as an excuse for me to be irresponsible in the present.
Caller
In fact, it's gonna look like entitlement to them to go, well, why fix our problems? They are. They're gonna build us a house for free. Sweet deal.
George Camel
Smart people don't wait for trouble to show up. They think ahead. It's true with money. And it's just as true about protecting your home. That's why I recommend SimpliSafe. Because most security systems only respond after someone's already broken in. But by by then, the damage is done. That's not a plan, that's a patch. Simplisafe is different. Their active guard outdoor protection helps stop break ins before they happen. Their AI powered cameras watch for suspicious activity. And if someone's lurking live, SimpliSafe agents can talk to the person, turn on spotlights, and even call the police. That's the kind of thinking that prevents crime in real time. Monitoring plans start around a dollar a day for your first month. It's free and there are no contracts, just proactive prot. That's why over 4 million Americans trust SimpliSafe and why it's been named best home security system of 2025 by CNET. And right now, you'll get 50% off a new system with professional monitoring. Go to simplisafedirect.com that's simplisafedirect.com. there's no safe like SimpliSafe.
John DeLoney
Foreign Tennessee. This is the Ramsey Show. I'm John Deloney, joined by my good friend George Camel. And we're taking your calls on your money, your relationships, your work, and your whole life. Triple 882-55-5225. Let's go out to continue Kentucky and talk to Jennifer. What up, Jennifer?
Caller
Hi, good afternoon.
John DeLoney
Good afternoon. What's going on?
Caller
I've been married about 20 years and we have three children. And when I brought debt to our marriage, I was told I should declare bankruptcy to get rid of the debt before we have children, kind of instead of working together, which I did. And after the humiliation of bankruptcy and ruined credit, I didn't want to go back through that. And so I took financial peace and I learned a lot. But I learned over time that my husband has a terrible habit of not being able to let go of physical property and things. And it has caused tremendous turmoil and stress. We've had at least one home taken. We are currently moved, and our other house has been on the market for a year. And we have two mortgages about 600,000 in debt. Outgoing is about 7,000. Incoming is about 5,000. It's so far beyond impossible.
Dave Ramsey
Yeah.
Caller
So you're going 25 grand into debt per year at this rate.
John DeLoney
That's just basic living expenses and just.
Caller
Trying to keep up. How many properties do you guys have?
Dave Ramsey
Two.
Caller
Only two? One of them you're living in?
Yes.
John DeLoney
Why did the last one get taken?
Caller
Well, that was years ago. We've had one or two taken because he won't let it go and maybe try to rent it out or want to try to fix it up and sell it himself, and it just doesn't affect on.
He can't afford the payment.
Yes.
Dave Ramsey
Okay.
John DeLoney
How has the house been sitting for a year?
Caller
Because he wanted to try to sell it himself from another state. And I was like, can we just let it go?
Where is the other property?
In the Midwest?
Okay.
John DeLoney
All right. So you said. You said. You said several things in a row. So you've personally had gone through bankruptcy. Were you married with him at the time, or is this a personal bankruptcy?
Caller
We. We had just. We were married, but we had our own. He wanted to keep the finances separate, but I had debt, and he wanted me to declare bankruptcy so we could have children. And I was like, well, can we work together? And you could do that? And so I did. I did it. But then later, when it was all these debt issues, I'm like, maybe you should declare bankruptcy. I don't know. And like, no, no, no, I do.
You guys still have separate finances?
It is together now, but I recently actually just opened my own account because I started getting really scared, like, what's going to happen if I don't put some money somewhere from my income. But I don't like living behind a person's back either. Like, if. If you're married, figure out.
John DeLoney
I know, Jennifer, but y' all been living apart for your whole marriage.
Caller
It's never really been together.
John DeLoney
Is that right?
Dave Ramsey
Right. Yeah.
Caller
He was.
John DeLoney
Because this isn't just money. This doesn't happen in a vacuum. This isn't just somebody. Isn't that absurd that you will declare bankruptcy? That's a better option for us coming together, you being bankrupt, than it is us working together to pay off our debts. That in and of itself is such madness that I know for a fact that doesn't just happen with money. That happens with sex and intimacy. That happens with travel. That happens with where we're going to live. It happens with jobs. It happens with everything, doesn't it?
Caller
Yes.
John DeLoney
Yes. Y' all haven't been together in 20 years. You've created three amazing kids.
Caller
Right?
John DeLoney
But y' all haven't been together in 20 years and now you're scared to death.
Caller
Yes.
What makes up the 600,000 in debt? How much of that is the mortgages?
A majority of the mortgages. Probably at least maybe 550 because there's also a loan on the other house where he wanted to fix up the other house.
He's got a HELOC on that. Or a home equity loan.
I honestly, I don't know. I wasn't involved in that. I mean, I named on it, but I don't. I don't know.
John DeLoney
Of course your name's on it because he couldn't get the loan without your name on it.
Caller
So your A1 is to get all the facts. And that means we're both going to pull our credit reports. You can do that for free. Go to annualcreditreport.com and just lay it all out. How much debt do we actually have as a family now? What can we do to clean this up and focus on the consumer debt first while trying to list these properties? And he needs to be working with an agent, it sounds.
John DeLoney
Hold on, hold on.
Caller
These have been for sale by owner, and he's just sort of figuring it out.
John DeLoney
Jennifer, can I ask you a person.
Caller
Get to that point?
John DeLoney
Okay.
Caller
I mean, I finally said, look, if we don't get this, I put the person, like, I have to divorce you. Like, I have no. Like I'm in a place where I don't even know what to say anymore.
John DeLoney
What did he say to that?
Caller
He finally did agree? Because, I mean, if he didn't, it was over. I mean, but now we're what was over? Our marriage.
So this was an ultimatum?
Yeah.
John DeLoney
Okay, so let me put it this way. Your old marriage is over, period. And what y' all are going to have to do now, if y' all want to, A, stay married, B, stay sane, is y' all gonna have to create a new marriage with a whole different operating system. And you're confident that he's in.
Caller
Started, but then he went out of state to go work to try to make some money to see if he can make ends meet. So we haven't been able to really do any of it together because he's gone.
What kind of work does he do?
Well, he's a teacher, but he's been. He also can remodel and do construction. So he's been working to remodel someone's house out of State.
There was no work in the entire state of Kentucky.
John DeLoney
There was no work for remodeling.
Caller
Well, this opportunity came about because of a conversation with a friend of ours, and they're like, hey, we're going to remodel this house on our property. I can do that.
And what do you mean? Are you working?
I am, yes.
Okay, what do you make?
Oh, goodness. I probably make maybe 2300, 2600amonth, maybe.
Okay, so you're making, like, together $12 an hour. What are you doing for work?
I teach.
Okay. And you're both teachers.
Yes, but he makes a bit more than I do because I was home with the kids for a long time, so.
Okay. Have you guys ever just sat down and laid out all the facts and created a budget and said, hey, this isn't working. We're not here to attack each other. Let's just make a game plan?
We did finally make one as we were starting the financial case before you went out of town. And I thought, okay, we're turning things around. And, hey, I think, you know, we need to maybe change this. And I don't want to do this again with the houses. But then we even argue over, like, my car. We've argued over my car and multiple cars even of mine over the years that are not practical or not affordable. And it's like, now it's at the.
Dave Ramsey
Point where it's at a level of.
Caller
Miles and at a level of maintenance need where it's even more not affordable.
How much do you guys have in car loans?
Dave Ramsey
Debt?
Caller
There's no car loan debt at all.
Okay, how much do you have in.
Savings that's now gone.
Dave Ramsey
Completely gone.
Caller
Okay, so we are at baby step zero.
Dave Ramsey
Yes.
Caller
So with your next paycheck, can you put away $1,000. No. And still cover the bills? Is he bringing in money actively right now?
John DeLoney
No.
Caller
Well, I mean, he's. He'll get paid from this job, but I mean, if there's 7,000 going out and 5,000 coming in, I have no idea.
John DeLoney
Jennifer, let me. Let me just. Let me cut to the chase. He's. He's. As soon as he. He got you off his back, he said, sure, honey, I'm gonna do this thing. And he found the next job out of town, and he took off on you, and he's hassling you over the phone. He's spending money while he's gone.
Caller
No, he's really. He's really not. He's not. He's staying with the. Yes. Because these are friends and you. He's working from the time he wakes up until about 1 the next morning almost every day on their house.
John DeLoney
Okay, maybe he, maybe he has made this change and it's just not translating. You all need a marriage counselor.
Caller
You're on different planets right now.
John DeLoney
Correct. And you all have a huge financial hole, but it's built on a house of a crumbling marriage. And y' all have to get that aligned if you're going to move forward. And as George said, you've got a math problem. And it may be that you got to find a different teaching job and a different, different district because you've got to deal with your income problem and you got to get some money and savings because you're in a very unsafe situation.
Caller
When you go through a job loss or job change and lose your employer sponsored health insurance, there's no better time to try Christian healthcare ministry. That's right. There's another option besides COBRA to take care of your family during that time. Because if you didn't know, the cost of COBRA has gone up a lot in the past few years. And CHM is an affordable, biblically based alternative to health insurance. So do your own research. The CHM is a great option that's potentially a third of the price of cobra. It's a health cost sharing ministry that's helped hundreds of thousands of families like yours take care of over $11 billion in medical bills since 1981. And the support you get from CHM goes beyond helping you pay for medical bills. Members become part of a family that prays for them when they have a medical event. Try getting that with cobra. So if you're going through a job loss, life change, or just want to explore other options to save on healthcare, CHM might be perfect for you. CHM programs start as low as $98 a month.
John DeLoney
Month.
Caller
So find out more@chministries.org budget that's chministries.org budget.
John DeLoney
Let's go out to the 512 in Austin, Texas and talk to a lot of Elijah. What's up, Elijah?
Caller
Hi.
John DeLoney
What's up?
Dave Ramsey
Well, I'm trying to currently get out of my car, but the engine gave out on me and now I'm wondering whether or not to fix it or try to sell it off as is without the engine.
John DeLoney
Oh, get out of your car. Get rid of it. Not like open the door handle. I was like, man, you called the wrong show, dude.
Caller
I don't know how to be.
John DeLoney
Me and George are not mechanically inclined.
Caller
Yikes. Okay, what's left on the loan?
Dave Ramsey
35,000.
Caller
Wow.
Dave Ramsey
And what's the repair cost for brand new engine, 16,000. And for rebuilt one? 10,000.
Caller
Okay, let's go with the 10,000 number. And how much do you have currently, if anything?
Dave Ramsey
I have a couple thousand.
Caller
Okay. And what is the car worth? As is.
Dave Ramsey
I haven't checked on it in a while, so I'm. I'm probably was sitting around 28.
Caller
Okay. And if you fix it up, it's obviously you're underwater on this car.
Dave Ramsey
Yes. Okay.
Caller
What would it be worth if you got this engine repaired?
Dave Ramsey
I haven't figured that out.
Caller
Okay. I would figure those pieces out. The key is you. You don't want to make repairs if it's not going to roi for you. If the car is not going to be worth that in this situation, I think it would be worth it to do the repairs. But you can't afford it in cash right now.
Dave Ramsey
Now. Yes, I can.
Caller
How much do you have exactly?
Dave Ramsey
I have about like 2000.
Caller
2000. And what do you make a month?
Dave Ramsey
Around $4,000.
Caller
Okay. So it would take you a long time at this point to save up that 10 grand to even do the repairs?
Dave Ramsey
Yes, man.
Caller
I would at least find out what it's worth today and find out what that number is you're underwater on. You might need to take out a loan to offload it and get out of the situation altogether. But it's gonna hurt either way. There's gonna be a stupid tax to be paid.
John DeLoney
What kind of car is it?
Dave Ramsey
Ford Mustang.
John DeLoney
And are you certain there's no recalls on it? There's no extended warranty or there's nothing. There's nothing under the. Like in the fine print there.
Dave Ramsey
I. I passed my warranty period by 2,000 miles. I'm sitting at 62,000.
John DeLoney
I think it's worth reaching out to him.
Dave Ramsey
I did that, and I don't have anything.
John DeLoney
Really?
Dave Ramsey
Yeah.
John DeLoney
They just said, we don't care about you. Here's what's amazing. George and Elijah. I was talking to a guy who came over early this morning to my house, was fixing my sprinkler, and he was talking about his engine blew up in a gmc. And he just. I mean, he was heartbroken. He said that his young son said, why is granddad's car truck still running? And he said, they used to have pride when they made these cars, and they just simply don't anymore. Robots don't have pride. And these guys. Anyway, sorry, brother. I. It's. This is the second story I've heard today. Where?
Caller
Yeah, the key is you need the difference. You're underwater on whether you fix it or not. You're going to need the difference is your credit shot. Could you go to your local credit union and get a loan for the difference?
Dave Ramsey
No, I haven't actually have a loan out because I messed up on it before earlier this year and I had to take out a loan for it with my credit union. So I haven't gone back to them to see if I could take on any more money.
Caller
I would at least check because I'd rather see you instead of 35,000 in debt, 15 or 20,000 in debt, at least reduce your debt load and then you're still going to need something to drive around. Right?
Dave Ramsey
Right. Yes.
Caller
You need a car for work?
Dave Ramsey
Yes, I do, man.
Caller
You might need to just go on Facebook Marketplace and find the cheapest beater you can find that's still running and has cold ac and that might be your next step. But you're, you're pausing the baby steps. Essentially you're in a store mode just trying to save up every dollar you can, working side hustles, trying to just get a beater so that you can still drive around. Get to work to keep income coming in.
Dave Ramsey
In. Right, right.
Caller
What are your transportation needs right now to get to work? Could you carpool, rent a car? What are your options?
Dave Ramsey
Public transportation, family to help me out and then another time to just take Uber.
Caller
What other debt do you have?
Dave Ramsey
I have credit card debt.
Caller
Okay. How much is that?
Dave Ramsey
That is around on 5000.
Caller
Are you living alone?
Dave Ramsey
No, I don't live with family.
Caller
Okay. So your expenses are super low, I hope.
Dave Ramsey
Yes.
Caller
What are your monthly expenses comparatively to your income? You make four grand. How much of that's going out to bills? Is that a thousand bucks to cover your bill? 2,000?
Dave Ramsey
Yeah, it's around 1,000.
Caller
Okay. What that tells me is within the next month you should have $3,000 left over that can go towards this beater car fund, correct?
Dave Ramsey
Yes.
Caller
Okay. I think your best bet is to just sell the car as is to a private buyer and get as much as you can for it. Because I don't know that that trying to fix it up and then sell it's going to be feasible for you in the foreseeable future.
Dave Ramsey
Okay.
Caller
But man, this, this sucks. There's no easy answers here. I wish I had a magic to just go to this website. It'll solve all your problems. The problem happened initially when a guy making 50 grand got a $40,000 Mustang. And so this this part is hard to undo because this is the ramifications of that, of what can happen is you go underwater on it. There's a repair issue. You have no savings. And so you're gonna have to borrow from family for now now and use that income of yours and get it up and try to get out of the situation.
John DeLoney
And, Elijah, let me tell you the good and the bad here, okay?
Dave Ramsey
Okay.
John DeLoney
The bad is you're in for about 18 months of, like, being embarrassed because you're a guy that likes a nice ride, right?
Dave Ramsey
Yes, I do.
John DeLoney
You're a guy that likes a nice ride more than he likes his own place. You'd rather live with your mom and have a nice car. Right. Than have a nice apartment and drive a crummier car. And so this is going to be you for the next 18 months, walking around town or driving around town or Ubering around town. And every time you want to hang your head in shame, I want you to hold your head up high and remember this moment and say the words, this will never happen to me again. I'll never put image. I'll never put what other people think about me ahead of my own financial safety ever, ever, ever again. Not for me, not for my family, not for anybody. And then the good thing is, this may be that moment that frees you forever from what other people think, because that's where you got. That's where you end up in this nonsensical mess, dude. And so that's my hope for you, man. That's my absolute hope for you.
Caller
I'd also go do some more homework on a rebuilt engine. See if you can find one elsewhere for cheaper, because if you can find one for five grand now, it's feasible. You got two grand of savings, you'll make three grand in the next month to throw at it. This might be a solvable problem or at least limit the damage. So I would do more homework before.
John DeLoney
I would go to every single mechanic in the Austin area and shake someone's hand and look them in the eye and say, I'm in a mess. Can you help out? Or can you look, can I outsource this to one of your guys and just do this off book and I'll pay them cash, But I'm in a mess, and I literally need somebody in my local community to step up and help me out. And maybe you'll get lucky. Lucky. Or maybe somebody will laugh at you and say, yeah, get out of here. And you might do that 10 times, but maybe the 11th, somebody will will have mercy on you and say, yeah, I'll let this mechanic of mine work on it on Saturdays and Sundays here in the shop for cash. I mean, I. I'm just spitballing here, George, but the cancer of our culture right now, one of many, is I care what other people think about me from the outside in. Instead of, I'm at peace and I'm gonna. I'm gonna enter into the world that way. I'm gonna drive around in a car that I can't afford, live at my mom's house so that I can have this. Like, I'm gonna make all these other concessions so that I can have this nice thing. And then, man, one thing goes wrong. I gotta borrow money to fix this nice thing. And then now the nice thing explodes even further. And it just. We just see this time after time after time. House, car, college loans with the promise of a job. And on the other end, it's just.
Dave Ramsey
Just.
John DeLoney
It's a constant drum beat. We hear y and it just breaks. It breaks my heart for Elijah, man.
Caller
Yeah, the. The cars are the number one wealth killer. And when you do them with debt, it just makes that exponentially painful and risky. And so think about it. If you pay cash for a car, you can't be underwater. You can always sell that car. You have the title free and clear. But when there's debt on it, there's a high chance you're going to be underwater on it soon enough. And most people that take on car payments don't have a fully funded emergency fund to cover the repairs. So put yourself in a good position. Drive what you can afford now. Drive like no one else now so you can drive like no one else later. And I will die on that hill.
John DeLoney
And you're talking to two knuckleheads who did the same, did that exact same thing. And we got our quote, unquote, dream job and our, quote, unquote dream spouses driving pretty crummy cars.
Dave Ramsey
Sam Foreign.
Caller
Welcome back to the Ramsey Show. I'm George Camel, here with Dr. John DeLoney. So, John, I've got a YouTube channel. And what we try to do is help people build wealth, especially young people who go, I don't want to wait till I'm 65 to enjoy my life. I get it. But we also know if you don't think about the future, plan for it, invest for it, it, then you'll never have money and you'll retire broke, which is not okay in America today because it's really easy to retire a millionaire. And yet Most people don't.
John DeLoney
Is it easy, George?
Caller
It's. Well, here's the thing. The math of it is easy.
John DeLoney
Okay, there you go.
Caller
The dollar amount you need to invest.
John DeLoney
How do I lose weight, diet and exercise. Like it's easy, but it's hard.
Caller
And as you know, and it's every single day it's harder to make progress.
John DeLoney
There you go. Yeah. When you change habits.
Caller
We all had abs at 24.
John DeLoney
Yes. Right. I mean I was, I've always had a thing for gummy candies. Just saying.
Caller
Okay, that's fair. But I thought it would be fun and I've done this on my channel is use our investment calculator to show you exactly how much you would need to invest based on your age in order to have a $1 million nest egg. Because here's the stat. Only 3% of US adults have a million bucks saved for retirement. Nearly half of Americans have under 10 grand saved and 26% have nothing in any retirement account.
Dave Ramsey
Account.
Caller
And some of that's due to, you know, living paycheck to paycheck. Some of it's financial literacy. But if you're listening to this show, listening to this segment, you now have no excuse, you know too much to retire broke.
John DeLoney
All right, bring it on.
Caller
Here we go.
John DeLoney
So we're going to start save the day GK.
Caller
Let's start with that 24 year old with ass, a young Dr. John, bright eyed, bushy tailed, ready to take on the world. And this is also assuming you're following the Ramsey plan, which means we're not going to take on crippling debt and car payments and student loans and credit card debt debt. But let's say you're ready to Invest. We recommend 15% into, into retirement and we're going to even go lower than that. We're going to go 150 bucks a month from age 24 to age 62. Let's see what happens. I've got it pulled up. If you're watching on YouTube, you can see in real time. We use this investment calculator on our website, which is free. We'll link it in the description. So you have nothing saved. We're starting from zero and we're going to invest 150 bucks a month and we're going to assume an 11% rate of return. Now, John, people are already, they're angry. They're already typing comments on YouTube going, Where's this guy getting 11% on his investments? This is just historical data from the s and P500. So if you look at the US stock market over the last 50, 70 years, you're going to see an average rate of return of 11%. So we're going to use that as our number. And what do we find, John? One million bucks. And guess what? 68,000 of that was John's contributions. 964,000 was growth. That is the power of starting early. And you'll see what I mean as we move on to our next example. Let's say you're 35, you have nothing saved. You got a hold of this plan a little bit later on in life. And let's also say you work a little bit later, 65, nothing saved. In retirement, you would need to invest 375amonth, which again is not even close to the 15% parameter. We recommend way lower. But even then at 11%, you'll see you have just over a million bucks. But at this point the growth was 916,000. Your contributions were 135,000.
John DeLoney
Is that real?
Caller
That's real math. And here's the thing I love can.
John DeLoney
Be if 24 year old me put 150 bucks away every month, that's it.
Caller
150 bucks, that's like doordash money. That's like all of your subscriptions combined for a month money. It's really not that much. The problem is human behavior. We don't have the consistency, the discipline to just put away that money and not go spend it elsewhere. And we go, well, that's a problem for future John to deal with 35 year old John when he's an adult and he's got like a family and stuff. He'll figure it out. Except we know that that's not how life works.
John DeLoney
I want to go back and just give a whooping to 24 year old me.
Caller
I know, I feel the same way. So don't get discouraged. Let's move on to 45. Or you know what, let's actually do 15%. Let's, let's look at that 35 year old who actually invests 15. Average household income is $80,000 in America. 15 of that is a thousand bucks a month. All right, so let's look at what happens when you invest a thousand bucks a month instead of 375. 2.8 million. So for those of you, well, John, a million bucks isn't going to be anything when I. Okay, how about 2.8 million? Can we concede that's a lot of money no matter where you came from. Good. And that's if you never get a raise. 35 to 65, 2.8 million if you invest 1000 bucks a month. Let's move on to the 45 year olds. A lot of people listening who went, man, I wish I could go back to when I was 35 and do this stuff. Let's say you're 45. You have not a dime saved in retirement. Now, the truth is, the math is going to differ here. You need to invest more to still achieve a million bucks. So we're going to pipe it up to $1,200 a month from 45 to 65, which again is still about a six figure household income. Investing 15%. And you can see you can still retire a millionaire at 65 years old with a million bucks in that account, even if you start from nothing at 45 years old.
John DeLoney
I know, George, but here's the big thing. You're leaving out my feelings.
Caller
Oh, I'm sorry. Let's hear it. How do you feel about this math?
John DeLoney
This just feels unfair. I don't know. I was trying to say something.
Caller
And now here's the other thing, John. People go, well, must be nice. Who's got 1200 bucks to invest? And I go, hey, how much is your student loan? Well, that's 400 bucks a month. Hey, what's your car payment? Well, that's 600 bucks a month. Hey, what are your credit card minimums? That's 200 bucks a month. I think I found 1200 bucks. Yeah, if we got out of that debt, that's how much money would free up to, then invest. Therein lies the power and simplicity of the Ramsey plan. When you don't owe people money, you have money left over. When you have money left over and you're willing to make sacrifices for future you, you will invest said money. So that's the big secret is live on less than you make, don't owe other people money, invest the surplus and you will be unbelievably wealthy.
John DeLoney
And that means in the short term not to minimize it. You've got to be very intentional about driving the car you need to survive, about not going out and figuring out ways to have people over to go out to the park. Is any of that cool? No. Oh, it's awful. And postponing in these days, postponing buying a house for maybe 10 years longer than it took me to buy my first house. Right. Like that's the reality. Those are expensive. But it is changing the way TV and Instagram says you should be living and saying, okay, based on this set of realities, we're going to live this way. And so we're going to figure out how to have a great, wonderful life in this little reality that we live in.
Dave Ramsey
And.
John DeLoney
And my promise is if you can choose to live in that, you can choose to find joy and laughter and.
Dave Ramsey
Yeah.
John DeLoney
It is what it is, man.
Caller
Well, it's crazy. Is to be truly wealthy, it has to be invisible to others. Nobody can see the balance of my 401k, but they can't see what's in my driveway. That's the problem, is we get way too excited about the thing going down in value in our driveway instead of the invisible number happening in an account somewhere in a 401k because it doesn't feel real and it doesn't affect our life right now. Now.
John DeLoney
But the idea is we're still using either one of those proxies as some sort of value statement on what we're worth instead of doing the harder work on our spiritual lives, our relational lives, our. Our emotional and, and, and mental health to say, no, I've got value just because. And I'm going to go do the next right thing for me and my family where we want to be when we're 65 years old. And I don't want to be like this other family. I don't want to have cut off my kids due to value differences and then have to go beg them to build us a wing in their new. So we have to reverse engineer where we want to be at 65 and just choose that reality.
Caller
Yeah. Do you want to be a financial burden to your family or do you want to leave an inheritance to your children's children?
Dave Ramsey
Right.
Caller
You get to choose.
John DeLoney
But that choice, as far as that calculator goes, that Choice begins at 24. That choice begins at 35.
Caller
Yeah. Building wealth in 2035 starts in 2025.
John DeLoney
I think that's an important thing.
Caller
That's the hard part to grapple with because we live for today. Everything is just. Just this ephemeral quick hit that we need as we scroll social media and the calculators. You know, only so many people get excited about a calculator. I love a good calculation. I love a good spreadsheet.
John DeLoney
One time you and I were at a punk rock show and you're like, pulled out one of your earplugs and you're like, hey, hold on, check this out. And you're like doing facts and figures in the mosh pit.
Caller
It was pretty cool. That's true. I stay away from the mosh pit. As a guy who's short? It's just most people's elbows are right where my face is. So it's not ideal. Not ideal, but I hope that encourages you. And listen, if you're 50, you're 55. Even if you're 60, yes, it's going to be harder, but you have catch up contributions. Hopefully you're making more than you ever have made in your entire life. So there's still time to retire with dignity. And I can even show you, John, from 50 to age, let's say 67, you're gonna have to work a little bit longer. You start with nothing. You invest a thousand bucks a month. You can still have $600,000 if you start at 50 with $0. So let that be an encouragement to you. You don't need to have a 20 million dollar net worth. But there's also no reason to retire broke and hope that social insecurity covers the bills. Because if you've listened to the show long enough, you know it doesn't. I don't want you to be that person. You can do better.
Dave Ramsey
Sam.
John DeLoney
If you're tired of living paycheck to paycheck and feeling like you can't get ahead, join one of our free Every Dollar trainings. They are new trainings every week this month and they're all hosted by one of the Ramsey personalities. Me, Jade, Ken, George, even Rachel Cruz.
Dave Ramsey
Wow.
John DeLoney
We're gonna show you.
Dave Ramsey
Wow.
Caller
I was impressed.
John DeLoney
I know. We're impressed too. We're gonna show you how to stick to a budget and even find up to 9,000 bucks of margin using every dollar so you can get out of debt and start building wealth. Plus you can ask us any of the questions you'd like during the live Q and A. Sign up for free@ramseysolutions.com webinar Scott to Charlotte, North Carolina and talk to Elizabeth. What up Elizabeth?
Caller
Hey, how are you guys doing? Thanks so much for taking my call.
John DeLoney
You got it. What's up?
Dave Ramsey
Up?
Caller
So I started listening to the podcast back in April because I was just really sick of being in credit card debt.
John DeLoney
Welcome to the cult, Elizabeth.
Caller
Yeah, and I just, I wasn't being able to save money like I wanted to. So I'm in baby step number two. I made my first budget and I can start seeing like where I was completely overspending and so I can cut back. But I'm 51, I'm married, I have an 11 year old daughter, I've got about $20,000 in credit card debt and I am trying to attack this debt. But I can't stop making myself contribute to my 401k and her 529 because I feel like I'm not doing what I can do to help us prepare for retirement and her school as she gets older. And so I just. I'm just having a hard time following the baby steps in order and just kind of need some help trying to make that make sense in my head because I just really want to get rid of this credit card debt because I just feel like. Like it's just hanging over my head and I just hate it.
So you want us to persuade you to pause investing altogether to get out of debt faster?
Yeah, and, like, my company offers a match and, you know, I always hear about the compound interest that you guys talk about, and we have a good bit in our 401k already, but it's just, you know, I just.
Dave Ramsey
I feel like I would have to pause for a really long time, and.
Caller
I just feel like I would put us behind.
What's your total debt? How much? Total consumer dollars debt.
So right now I've got about $20,000 in credit card debt. We own our cars, we have a mortgage left and a home loan that's got about 67,000 on it, and we owe about 97,000 left on our mortgage.
Do you have a second mortgage?
We. Yeah, we took like. It was like. It's not a heloc, but it was like a personal home loan we took out.
So the consumer debt is your credit card debt of 20k. Okay.
Correct.
So that's the focus. Is that across multiple cards?
Yeah, two cards.
Okay. And what is your income? What's your gross household or your. Your gross income that you're investing off? Right now?
It's about $50,000 after taxes.
What about before it was.
It hovers because I. I kind of do a base salary and commission.
Okay.
So it's usually about like, 57,000, I would probably say.
And how much are you investing as a percentage right now?
Now I was doing 15%.
Okay.
So about $300 a paycheck.
So right now you are investing 300 bucks a paycheck, and you get paid twice a month.
Correct.
So about 600 bucks is what you'd free up.
Dave Ramsey
Correct.
Caller
Have you calculated how much interest you're paying on that credit card debt every single month?
One's 19% and one's 15%.
So are you doing the math at home?
John DeLoney
Compound interest works both ways. Ways here.
Caller
So here's what you're really doing. You're basically borrowing Money to invest. Think about that. Would you go into credit card debt to the tune of 20% APR in order to put 15% of your income.
John DeLoney
Into retirement to make 11% return?
Dave Ramsey
No.
Caller
That's essentially what we've done and what we continue to do. And the other part of this is you haven't found momentum. I mean, you're 51 going, I got to clean this up. I got to invest for the future. You're trying to do 17 things at once and you're not making progress. So at this current rate, how long would it take you to pay off your credit card debt while you're doing these other things?
Probably, like, I would say two or three years. Probably.
Would you agree that it sucks to be paying 20 grand of credit card debt over three years?
Yes.
So what if we said, hey, we're going to buckle down for less than a year? In less than 12 months, we're going to be out of this debt. We're going to get an emergency fund, which. When's the last time you had a fully funded emergency fund?
Probably never. I've got the $1,000, but never the.
Dave Ramsey
Fully funded emergency fund.
Caller
Picture that Future for Elizabeth 18 months from now. You have no debt, you owe nobody anything except the mortgages, and you have a fully funded emergency fund. How good would that feel?
It would feel great because I have anxiety about it all the time.
John DeLoney
Okay, can I, can I go one step further?
Caller
Sure.
John DeLoney
How much of a gangster do you want to be right now?
Caller
Now I will. I would like to be a big.
One, big time gangster.
John DeLoney
So you're going to, you're going to drink two ladles of our cult Kool Aid right now. You ready?
Caller
Okay.
John DeLoney
I want you to sit down with your 11 year old and I want you to. Is it a boy or girl?
Caller
It's a girl.
John DeLoney
I want you to tell her Mommy has a 529 account, which is where I'm saving for college for you. But mommy borrowed a whole bunch of money on these things called credit cards that are no good. Good. And I'm going to pause putting money in for college and I'm going to get this cleaned up because here's what I'm hearing in you. I'm hearing a, a, a weight, a, like a, like a ruck bag full of weight. Full of bricks of shame.
Caller
Yes.
John DeLoney
You're a good mom. In fact, you're a freaking amazing mom.
Dave Ramsey
Mom.
John DeLoney
Okay? And the reason I want you to sit down with your 11 year old, because shame eats secrets. That's how it grows so I'm going to sit down my 11 year old and say I made some choices early on and I've learned new things and I'm sorry we were going to have this much money. We're going to have less than that now, but your mommy is working really hard with dad and we're going to be free. And your 11 year old will go, okay, can I have some chips? And you'll be like, yeah, that's fine. But you'll, you'll know for you, I sat down and stared this thing literally in the face and put on the table, this is who I am. I made some mistakes financially. I have, George has, Dave has, we all have. And so I'm going to own that and I'm going to go do the next right thing. But borrowing at 19% to make 11 for some future version of you because you feel ashamed in the present doesn't make sense on any level.
Caller
Right.
Are you doing this alone, Elizabeth?
Dave Ramsey
No.
Caller
I mean, like I said, I just kind of found everything. And so my husband is on board because he's feeling the same way.
Is he doing the same thing? Is. Does he also make money? He's also investing, yes. What does he make?
He makes after taxes, probably about 81.
And what debt does he have? Is he not helping pay this credit card debt off?
No, he's. We had, we've had, we're trying to combine everything right now. We had everything separated.
Okay, what is trying to combine look like for you guys?
We are basically opening, we opened up a new account and we're basically getting everything set up to go into that account and be coming out good. Like.
He makes 81, you make 57.
Yes.
Okay, so you guys make like $140,000 a year. Isn't that crazy?
Yeah.
Like the gross number that flows through your hands per year year is astounding. And so you can knock out 20k of credit card debt real fast, making 140 grand. Yeah, because you're, are you bringing home like 8 grand a month as a couple?
Yes.
Okay, think about that.
That's what I kind of figured out.
Could you live off four and throw the other four credit card debt? Because that's five months. You're debt free. That's just the math.
I think, I think we could. We're just, like I said, we're, we're did a budget and we figured out where we're overspending. And so I think we probably could.
Dave Ramsey
We're just gonna have to work on.
John DeLoney
All right, so Elizabeth, I will End up with some skin in the game if you are. Are you in?
Caller
Yes, I am.
John DeLoney
How? All in.
Caller
I'm all in.
John DeLoney
All right, here's the deal. If you promise me you're 100 all in, we're gonna send you financial peace, the digital course. I want you and your husband to watch online lessons, not just a bunch of YouTube clips. Okay.
Caller
Okay.
John DeLoney
Number two, do we're going to hook you up with the EveryDollar app that y' all can use together and connect it to your bank account for a year. The premium version. Okay.
Caller
Okay.
John DeLoney
You promise you're going to use them both?
Caller
Yes, I will.
John DeLoney
If you will make me a commitment that you two are. Because this is going to require redoing how you all do your marriage. Right?
Caller
Right. Exactly.
John DeLoney
If you'll commit to this, I'll give you and your husband two seats to my Valentine's Day marriage retreat here in Nashville, Tennessee with Rachel Cruz at the Money Marriage Church.
Dave Ramsey
Oh, wow.
Caller
That would be amazing.
John DeLoney
Are you in?
Caller
Yeah, I will be in.
John DeLoney
It's Valentine's Day weekend. It's a Jill it's expensive ticket. And you all can come to Nashville and come to the retreat on me if you're in. Promise.
Caller
I would love that. Thank you. All right, stakes are high.
John DeLoney
Game on. Game on. I've. I've put some my cards down the table. Now it's your turn. Can't wait to see you in February during Valentine's Day weekend. This is the time you change your life.
George Camel
I was sick and tired of being sick and tired. Bankrupt with a toddler and a brand new baby at home. Scared doesn't even begin to cover it. But I got mad enough to change. I started using God's and grandma's ways of handling that journey. Became the total money makeover, a plan everyday people can use to take control of their money. Millions have changed their lives following the plan in this book and found hope. Start your makeover today@ramseysolutions.com store.
John DeLoney
Live from Nashville, Tennessee, it's the Ramsey Show. I'm John Deloney joined by George Campbell, taking your calls from all over the planet on your life, your money, your relationships, your work, whatever you got going on in your life. We're here to sit with you and help you figure out the next right move. 888-255-225. Let's go to the state of Kentucky and talk to Bethany.
Caller
It's actually a commonwealth.
John DeLoney
Chunk of the Commonwealth of Kentucky. What's up, Bethany?
Caller
Hey, thank you guys so much for taking my call. I'M excited to get your perspective on my situation today.
John DeLoney
Go for it.
Caller
Okay. So I, I'm a married mom of three kids, married to my best friend. We are very blessed and financially we're in a good spot. We have about a 2 million dollar net worth. We've worked very hard, you know, ever since we got married 18 years ago. And both of us have always worked full time. So, you know, early on in our relationship we talk goals and you know, I never had a goal to be a stay at home mom or to work part time. But then things change and so now we're finding ourselves in a place where our oldest is about to go into high school. And I think for me it's like the mom guilt of I don't have time to really spend quality time with my children. Our youngest is seven. And so I'm seeing, you know, the perspective of a teenager and then an early elementary student and I'm just seeing it all just kind of play out so quickly. So I want to stay at home more and my husband has kind of come to where he's like, yeah, it's fine. But I know he's just saying it's fine because he wants to make me happy and I want to make sure I'm not being selfish, I guess, in my desire to be at home more because it's not really our goals. I guess it's more like my goals have changed.
John DeLoney
I think you're going to get yourself into trouble or you're right for resentment for both of you. And that's, that's a place in a relationship that's very, very hard, if not impossible to come back from.
Caller
Yeah.
John DeLoney
And so I'll tell you, your, your, your goals are noble and they're great. And your husband's goals, whatever they are, I'm certain they're noble and great. He's not on the phone, so I don't know what his goals are. I'm more concerned that this is the part, let me say it this way, the number of students who came to my university, wherever I happened to be working and got dropped off and, and that was the day their parents split up. Was, was. I can't count them all. And it started with little moments like this.
Caller
Yeah.
John DeLoney
When I start building my life, you start building your life and suddenly you wake up and that the kid of yours that's in elementary school is going off to college 10 years from now and you realize we are on two different planets. And so what I really would love you all to do is to like Circle all the way back and say, hey, who do we want to be?
Dave Ramsey
Be?
John DeLoney
And I'm with you. I got a 15 year old that I am working every day of my life to not pre be sad that he's going to be gone in three years. Because I literally love having him around. Like, not just he's my kid. Like, I love the kid around. He's hilarious, he's fun, all that. And then I have an elementary school daughter that I can't wait till she goes, I'm just kidding. I'm glad she's here too. But, like, I'm right in the same spot with you, and my wife and I are doing the exact same thing right now. Like, who do we want to be in this many years? And how do we reverse engineer that right now? But that starts getting on the same page.
Caller
Yeah.
John DeLoney
Why doesn't he want you to stay at home?
Caller
Well, so it's not that he doesn't want me to. It's just. I think he makes comments like, you know, I kind of expected you to want to do this when they were younger. You know, he's like, why now? And for me, it's, you know, I want to be able to, I guess, cook a. Cook a good meal. And, you know, instead of we're constantly picking up my food.
What is he actually worried about?
John DeLoney
Yeah, what's he saying? Because that's a. That's a. That's a grenade he just pulls a pin on and hands you. I just thought you'd be somebody, dude. Different 15 years ago.
Caller
Yeah.
Dave Ramsey
Well.
Caller
And I think it's because, you know, we've always talked about it and it's always been. And here's where I think it's coming from. Neither of us come from a family that had a mom who stayed at home. Both of our moms worked full time.
John DeLoney
Okay. But either y' all come from a home where y' all are multi millionaires.
Caller
I mean. No.
John DeLoney
Okay. So the whole. So that model doesn't work. Doesn't matter.
Caller
Yeah.
John DeLoney
Y' all are creating something completely new.
Caller
Is he worried about money being tight? What's actually behind.
No, I don't. I don't think it's as much money being tight as it is the example we're setting for our kids. Because he said things like, you know.
So he thinks because my mommy worked, that was a great example for me. And if you stay at home, it's gonna be a bad example for our kids because they're gonna realize that having mom around is awesome. What's the what's gonna happen, happen? What is he really scared about? The kids are seeing the best example that this is what happens when you set yourself up for freedom, margin flexibility and options. We get to have a present mom who's not stressed.
John DeLoney
We get to do whatever we want.
Caller
Having great experiences.
John DeLoney
You're about to say something. What were you saying, Bethany?
Caller
Well, I was just gonna say so, you know, the oldest has, you know, childhood memories of me working full time. The youngest, you know, is kind of in that age where she's just going to really, I guess her memories are just kind of starting to get shaped. You know, she's at 7. And so I think his, his concern is, you know, the oldest had a working mom. I know how the youngest will perceive. And I mean, I get what y' all are saying.
John DeLoney
That's nonsense. I'm telling you right now. That's not. Let me, let me tell you how kids memories work. They work. Nervous system out. Okay.
Caller
Okay.
John DeLoney
And so a kid is going to have encoded in their body literally this was a safe place to be or this was an unsafe place to be. I was loved and it was warm and it was a, it was my home base or it was a place where I had to have some sort of mechanism to control for safety. I had to perform. I had to get straight A's, I had to punch a hole in the Sheetrock. I had to get between mom and dad. Whatever, whatever. That's, that's what they, they're encoded for. And so if mom and dad were united working together because they both came from situations where money was tight and tough, that your oldest kid is going to benefit from a united mom and dad who are working towards a goal. And I'm going to be honest, the data tells me your oldest kid missed out on some stuff too.
Dave Ramsey
Yeah, right.
John DeLoney
And your 11 year old is going to have a parent at home, but is also going to be encoded in mom and dad sort of split up little by little in the living room. That's this idea that like my wife talks often about how my son would come visit her and her when she was a professor. My son knew my, my wife as Dr. Deloney. My daughter doesn't and she laments that, but I'm. No way are we going to put that on the kids.
Caller
Yeah, right.
John DeLoney
You get what I'm saying?
Caller
I do.
John DeLoney
Your husband may not like you being a stay at home mom. What are you gonna do all day? And if that's nonsense that's going through his head, y' all need to sit down and have that conversation. But to blame it on the kid. Well, what's the kid gonna think of you that your 11 year old doesn't get a vote? She's 11.
Caller
And I think, I think I can see the value that I would bring in saying home more because I'm a mom and I think because had I'm.
John DeLoney
A husband, I'm a dad, and I see that value.
Caller
Yeah.
You don't need to pitch this like a shark tank.
Dave Ramsey
Yeah.
John DeLoney
Dude, you're not trying to convince us. George's wife just resigned a couple years. It was a year and a half ago.
Caller
Yeah. She was a rock star executive here, executive assistant here at Ramsey. And after nine years, she decided, I'm going to stay at home with my family.
John DeLoney
You don't have to convince us. And my wife has worked and she'll go back to like. So it's not like a it. Yeah. Y' all need to sit down and get aligned because I think my gut tells me this is a way, way deeper issue. Bethany.
Caller
Okay.
John DeLoney
In fact, I'd almost guarantee it. He's got a picture in his head of what life's going to look like and he may have respect issues that he's passing on to your kid. Whatever. You'll need to get to the bottom of those things and come out as a united front.
Caller
This is not about the kids.
John DeLoney
Yeah. This is about you and your husband. Get on the same page for what kind of life do we want to have and who do we want to become? Start there.
Caller
Hey, teachers. Your students are stepping into the real world and starting to deal with the money challenges that all grownups face. From making that first paycheck stretch to figuring out how to afford college or trade school. They need real life knowledge and know how right now. And with foundations and personal finance, your students can learn how to budget, how to save, how to avoid debt. Like real world money skills that last a lifetime. So learn more by going to ramseysolutions.com foundations. That's ramseysolutions.com foundations. It is a weird time in the real estate market and buying or selling your home, it's a big deal. And with all the clickbait headlines, conflicting data out there, it's hard to know what's really happening in the housing market. So we're here to make the latest trends easy to understand. MEDIA Median home prices stayed steady last month, about $441,000. The number of homes for sale hit a million for the second month in a row. So there's a lot more supply out there and it's really turning into a buyer's market. Buyers have more options, more negotiating power and sellers face some competition. So the average 15 year fixed rate held steady at around 6% last month. So if you're debt free, you got a fully funded emergency fund, you have a solid down payment and now could actually be a great time to buy or sell your home. And if you want to learn more about housing market trends and get some free tools to help you buy or sell with confidence, go to ramseysolutions.com market or click the link in the Show Notes if you're listening on podcast or YouTube.
John DeLoney
All right, let's go out to Maine and talk to Chuck. What up, Chuck?
Dave Ramsey
Hey guys, how you doing?
John DeLoney
Good. What's up with you?
Dave Ramsey
So I've got about 260 and change in my Roth IRA and we owe 255. My wife and I owe 255 on our primary residence. And I was just about to pull the trigger on paying off the primary residence with the Roth from the Roth. I'm 60, so there's no problem with any penalties or anything or any kind of any taxes. And then all of a sudden a house popped up that we're thinking about buying for my daughter, our daughter and her husband. My daughter's special needs. She's autistic, high functioning and he's also autistic and high functioning. But are the jobs that they have, I don't think the income that they can make, I don't think they're ever going to be able to buy their own house. So a couple years ago we said we'd buy them a house but we were going to be three years out from doing that because some other things. But now this has popped up so we're trying to figure out do we pay off our own house or do we try and pull the trigger on this one?
Caller
How much other money do you guys have in retirement?
Dave Ramsey
So we're doing really well. We've got, my wife has 184 in her Roth. I've got 880 in a, in a rollover IRA and regular IRA, traditional IR and my wife's got 130 in her in our 401k. So we're doing really well. And we've got two other. We've got our primary house, we've got a second house in Arizona and we've got two rental properties in Arizona and.
Caller
Those all have mortgages or are they paid for?
Dave Ramsey
All the houses have mortgages but they're Worth way more than what the mortgages are.
Caller
Okay. I mean, on paper you are doing really well. I think there's more risk here than you. You think. Because things are going okay right now. So I would just caution you to not just throw money in random directions. I would love for you guys to be able to retire with no debt whatsoever and then reassess the situation. So for your daughter, what is the urgency to get them a house right now? Can they rent? Can they afford that?
Dave Ramsey
Not they can rent, but I think it's more of just if something happened to us. Us, we want to make sure that they've already. They're already in a house and, and they're taken care of and they just have to take care of the taxes and insurance.
John DeLoney
Did one pop up in your neighborhood that's going to be about that 260 and you think you can just cover it?
Dave Ramsey
Well, it would be, it would be like in this area, it's like 380, but so we would put two. Sweet. Would put 260 down or 230 down. Excuse me. And then have a mortgage for six months. And then, then when my wife hits 59 and a half, she'd cap her Roth and we'd pay the balance off.
John DeLoney
Can I tell you a rule of thumb I use for my house? There's. This is just a rule in the Deloney house. Anytime my wife and I are faced with an either or decision, we force ourselves to put two or three or four other options on the table, just to see. Because almost every bad decision I've made in my life, it was either this or that. And I forced myself into a false binary decision here. And so right when you're talking, the first thing that popped into my head was, what if you did both? What if you sold one of those properties in Arizona, you paid the other one off, used your Roth, paid your house off, and then you got your kids into a $320,000 house. You could do it all and not have to play the shell game anymore.
Dave Ramsey
100%. The only issue is we've lost out on houses here. That around here houses are 500,000. I mean, little tiny little postage stamps. 1,000 square feet are 500, 600,000. It's craz. This one popped up at 381,000 square feet and it's 15 minutes from us. We're going to.
John DeLoney
You might not do it in that order, right. You might put 260 down on it and pull your Roth and put 260 down on it. And then Put your other house on the market. You'd have to be disciplined to do those things.
Caller
I'd rather liquidate real estate to John's Point than to just yank it all out of retirement as soon as I could.
Dave Ramsey
Sorry. Just real quick. So that makes complete sense. But what's going on is the other. The second house in Arizona, it. If we sold that right now, there would be capital gains on it. We were planning on living in that house for two years so we wouldn't have to pay capital gains on selling that house.
Caller
You've created a real complicated situation for yourself with this long distance. No, we can't do that because we have to live. So we're gonna have to move our entire life out there.
John DeLoney
Double stamp. Yeah. Pay taxes and move all your life.
Dave Ramsey
We plan on doing that anyway. We're trying to get out of the winters and split coast, so we're gonna do that anyway. Okay.
John DeLoney
Okay.
Caller
I, I'm, I'm a fan of just living a simple life. That's my simplifying my life would be a one. And I want you guys debt free before you go gift a house to your daughter. And so that plan might need to wait. I would personally liquidate the property, pay the taxes. I wouldn't play the game that you're playing personally. And I would just simplify it. Have no debt. Because right now you're saying, hey, things are going really well. Sounds like you have a million dollars of debt floating around out there at the same time. Time. Right.
Dave Ramsey
Well, we've got 1.8 in real estate and we've got 900 equity. So. Yeah, that's about right.
Caller
There we go. And so it looks good on paper. You guys have an incredible net worth. You've done very well. I'm not worried that this whole thing is going to implode, but I do think you're burning a lot of brain calories that don't need to be burnt. And I would just liquidate. I, I wouldn't. I'm not a fan of being a long distance landlord. I would just sell a few of the properties. Properties, Pay off your own mortgage, use any more profits to cover a house for your daughter. But I would not wanting to be taking on a mortgage for them either.
Dave Ramsey
All right, so we'll lose out on this opportunity, but there'll be other opportunities.
Caller
There's always. See, that's the thing with the real estate game. People like, they're like, there's always gonna be another opportunity. There's also an opportunity to just simplify and not Go chase down another real estate thing and just retire when you want to instead of work because you.
John DeLoney
Have to cover 900, you can retire as a millionaire. Have. Have. And let's be honest, the. Your daughter's challenges that's been on like you've. You've been under that squat rack, like that's been a heavy weight for you for a long time. Right. Her whole life. You have an opportunity to live 15 minutes down the street from her. Both of y' all in paid off houses. You're still a millionaire. You don't have to deal with property managers six states over. Like there just is this idea of solving for people peace. And a lot of times when we have chaos in our lives that we can't control, we spin up chaos other places so that we can play whack a mole with different variables and feel like we're doing something. But we often realize when we step back, we just got stuck in mud and we just hammered the gas so it felt like we were going somewhere. You get what I'm saying?
Dave Ramsey
Yeah, absolutely. So pay off our primary house first.
Caller
Yes, I would be.
John DeLoney
And then I would sell one of those real estate places. I would get your daughter a house.
Caller
I created a domino idea of debt freedom, man. So sell a property, whatever, you could snowball it. If all the properties are in similar mortgages, you could just snowball it, smallest to largest. If that's. I would go personally go primary first because that's the house I live in. So I want the least amount of risk there and then go about the business of selling one paying off.
John DeLoney
Let me ask on behalf of. Of Chuck here, George. I don't personally have a problem if he does this out of order. If he does it over the next 90 days. Right.
Caller
So you don't have any consumer debt, do you, Chuck? Just the mortgage.
Dave Ramsey
Mortgage, yeah.
John DeLoney
If you. If you want to go put 75 down on your daughter's house down the street because you're only going to float that mortgage for. For a month while you get this other house paid off. I don't personally have a problem with that. Unless you're gonna. It's gonna actually liquidate the whole Roth then. Because you have a way to do all of this without liquidating that Roth too. But I don't know. It is what it is, man. I.
Caller
You're still taking about a third of your nest egg and depleting it and putting in into real estate. And so that's something to just weigh. I would personally work with a financial planner. Do you Have a good financial advisor. That's the big question. And if you don't, I would jump on ramseysolutions.com chuck and click on smartvestor pro and they can lay it all out for you more than we can in a quick show.
John DeLoney
All right, so. So, George, if this is you, how what direction would you do it and what order would you.
Caller
I would sell my least favorite property.
John DeLoney
Today, put on the market today, pay.
Caller
The taxes, use the profits to pay off my own mortgage, and then see what happens from there. Do I need to sell one more to get daughter a home? Okay, let's do that. That's more.
John DeLoney
So you would let this house 15 minutes from y' all go this time?
Caller
There's always gonna be another opportunity. And truthfully, in every opportunity, you go, oh, we didn't know that it had mold issues. That's why it was priced so low. There's always something around the corner. So I would do your due diligence, do your homework, and realize there's always going to be another one.
George Camel
We've all done dumb things with money. I've done them with zeros on the end. One of the biggest mistakes I see people make with money is not having a plan. You got to have a plan. You got to be intentional. And you need to get a budget. You have to tell your money where to go so you're not wondering where it went. Our budgeting app, EveryDollar, helps you do just that. It's the easiest and fastest way to make a monthly plan. For every dollar you've got coming in and going out, now's the best time to get started before the ridiculous holiday spending season gets here and sucks you in because you didn't have a plan. Don't let that happen. You're done making that mistake. Go download every $$ for free in the App Store or Google Play today.
John DeLoney
All right, Take two seconds and hit the subscribe button for the show. And if you're listening to us via podcast or on a streaming service, one of our friends over at Spotify.
Dave Ramsey
Hit.
John DeLoney
Hit the subscribe button. It just makes such a difference for all of us. It doesn't cost any money. Takes two seconds, and it really helps us out. Let's go to Savannah, Georgia, and talk to Emory. What's up, Emery?
Caller
Hey, thanks for taking my call.
John DeLoney
You got it. What's up?
Caller
Well, we are. We have a lot of debt, and we just kind of shifted our thinking the last couple months. We've been Dave Ramsey Ramsey fans our whole marriage. We got out of $30,000 of debt 10 years ago, but then started going down the slippery slope. My husband's about to be 40, I'm 37, and we have three young kids at home. We have two rental properties. One's on the market right now in the Nashville area. We owe 170 on each, and they're worth about 310 to 320. We're hoping to get one at a time. My question is, what to do with the profits?
Are you just selling one or both?
We are planning on selling both, but one at a time because they're in the same neighborhood and they would compete with each other.
John DeLoney
Oh. Ooh. Fight. Y' all should pick one. You get one and he gets the other, and y' all should compete.
Caller
What caused you guys living in Savannah to get two properties in Nashville?
We used to live in Murfreesboro, and my husband went to mtsu.
Oh, so you became landlords by default fault? Yeah, not by choice.
We worked the system. We had the VA loan. We lived in it a year, moved, lived in a year and moved. So we thought this was going to be a great source of income. Over the years, it's been great, but we're kind of. I'm wanting to get out of it because I manage it primarily. And we went into debt turning one into a furnished rental last year and renovating it. So we have about $24,000 on a credit card left from that. We've paid about half of it off. It used to be over 40, but we still have 24 left, and we want to get rid of that. What other 1,000? We have 31,000 on a car loan, and we have our primary mortgage, which is 292 left. And then we also have business loans. So my husband moved here and he started a land clearing business. And so we have two loans with the business. We're in our third year.
How much business? Business debt.
We have an SBA loan of that's 10, 10 and a half variable. It's at 170 right now, and then a machine loan at 90,000.
Goodness gracious.
John DeLoney
Holy smokes. So you're in the go into the government for almost 200 grand, and you're on a depreciating asset to the tune of 90 grand.
Caller
Yeah, but they make us a lot of money. We're in our third year. Last year we. He grossed 330. So he's doing really well. He's a sole proprietor. Really?
If he's doing really well, why aren't you guys doing really well? Yeah, you're in crippling credit card debt, bragging about how much money this business.
John DeLoney
Makes, and you owe $200,000 to the government.
Caller
So if I'm tracking correctly, you owe 315,000 from this consumer and business debt. Does that sound right?
The consumer business debt, the 170 and.
The 90 credit card debt, the car loan, the business debt. That.
Yeah. Plus the mortgages on the rentals. That's why they're on. They're for sale right now.
Yeah, we want to go out of.
It, and we want to cash out fresh.
John DeLoney
Sure. No, we got you. We got you. We're just. We're.
Caller
So you're walking away. If you sell both rentals, you'll maybe walk away with like $240,000 profit, I guess.
Yeah, about that. And then, you know, capital gains and all the capital gains.
So let's say there's 200 grand. What would I do with 200 grand? Grand.
Yeah.
I would throw it at the consumer debt and the business debt, using the debt snowball. Because that business debt is your debt. You guys personally signed the dotted line there. So there's no, like, LLC that owes that. It's just you guys.
Yeah. Really throw it at that.
Yeah.
John DeLoney
Me personally, I'd. George, tell me if I'm wrong, I would want to get the government off my back asap. Is that wrong, or do you want to pay off the.
Caller
Yeah, I mean, if you get snowballed it. Most of it. Most of that debt is going to be gone. And then it'll leave you with the. That. Is there one gigantic debt? That 170,000.
Yeah, it covered a machine and just the startup capital. And then the 90 grand is for an excavator.
Well, you clear the rentals, you clear a bunch of this debt, it's going to free up a whole bunch of income on top of that. And then I think you also. You guys have been spending like you're in Congress, it sounds like.
Well, we don't. We don't. The 24 was just for renovations. We're not, like, spending.
John DeLoney
I know, but if he. If he made 300 grand, where that money goes, where that money would go.
Caller
Well, he invested 10 grand in the renovations. That went really quick. Okay.
This is boy math. He can justify any expense because it's an investment.
Yeah.
You can't argue with that.
Yep.
Okay.
And then he put ten grand on the car, but we did the rest on a loan. And then we. He put about 50 grand in investments.
Okay. I think what's happened is you guys Are stuck in a broke person person mindset of how much down, how much per month? How much down, how much per month? Can I afford the payment? Can I afford the payment?
John DeLoney
You're also stuck in, in person in social media entrepreneur hell.
Caller
This guy's one tick tock away from imploding your family.
John DeLoney
Well, but I mean, it's like we're gonna do rental houses so we can get passive income. I'm gonna get some machines and do some excavator land movement stuff. Yeah. I'm also going to do some investments. I'm also, you see what I'm saying? Saying like all these are all just like you can just go on Instagram to these different businesses.
Caller
Right. We're ready to move on though. I know we got 40 and I think his eyes have been opened and he's, he's ready.
John DeLoney
Awesome. My big fear is these excavator type jobs are, are boom and bust. They have years where they just absolutely crush and then they've got years where the phone doesn't ring as much and you really got to get out there and hustle. And so while you're, while it's raining for y', all, man, God almighty, pay off everything. I know that's where y' all are headed. But here, and here's the math, you.
Caller
Guys will be completely debt free except for your personal mortgage within a year. If you do this stuff, you throw 200 grand at the 315, you're down to 115 following. You throw 10 grand a month at that debt, it's gone in 12 months.
Yeah, yeah, that's it.
That's the actual math. Now you can argue that. Well, well, but that's how that would work. You guys could be completely debt free in that baby step six realm with just that 292 mortgage left. 12 months from now, that's you and.
John DeLoney
Your husband shaking hands. No more of these quote unquote investments. We're going to pause on putting any money away. Except you got one. What is it?
Caller
Is he over there whispering to you sweet nothings?
Oh, yeah, no, he's here listening and he's on board. But I have to be honest, at the Invest, we have 8 in a Roth, but the 50 was encrypted, of course. I'm really trying to get him to just release that because if you see the number 15 crypto, about 50 in credit card and car debt, like, I just want to wipe it clean.
John DeLoney
Yes.
Caller
And my deal was if we paid off everything and we started at 15% that he could have a small percentage to do crypto if we could really get in a stronger position. That was kind of my deal.
I told him I will be impressed if he offloads the crypto, because what's going to happen is one year from now, they're going to go, those Ramsey guys told me to sell my crypto, and I could have doubled it, babe, to 100. We could have. We could have been bajillion. That's what's gonna happen.
John DeLoney
And there's grandparents out there with garages full of Beanie Babies who had the exact same thing. Like, yeah, dude, no, listen. Beanie Babies are gonna crush. All right, cool.
Caller
Yeah, it's a gamble. Yeah.
So it's. And it's fine if you want to use some fun money for crypto. Do that, but not when you're in crippling debt in every corner. And so I would just get out of this. Let's start from scratch.
Dave Ramsey
Catch.
Caller
Let's pay off the house. Let's have an actual nest egg and retirement accounts, and then we can go, hey, we're so unbelievably wealthy. We can just throw money into these things for fun with no debt and not worry about it and not need it to grow. And 10x.
John DeLoney
Let's 10x. The 10x to a thousandx.
Dave Ramsey
I don't know.
Caller
I get it. I'm on it.
That's it. So you know what this means? No more social media.
John DeLoney
Hey, look over to your husband. I want to hear him. Are you in? Totally.
Dave Ramsey
Oh, yeah. I'm 110%. And that's why we're calling.
John DeLoney
Love it. Okay. Okay. If you're all in 110%, that means you're more than 100, which means you definitely do crypto math. That means I want all the cryptos gone by the end of the week, and you're debt free, which is dope in your consumer stuff, and then you just sell your houses, your business free, and then you're off to the races.
Caller
I like this plan.
Dave Ramsey
Yeah, that sounds like a good plan to me.
John DeLoney
I mean, I'm.
Dave Ramsey
I'm ready to hit sell.
John DeLoney
Dude, that's so awesome. I'm proud of you, man. Hey, can I also say this? It's hard to be in that place, isn't it? Because you have been working really hard, haven't you?
Dave Ramsey
It is. And I gave up my career as a pilot to, you know, be home with my family and started this business. And, you know, it. It's been. It's been a good trade off. But I do want to be completely.
John DeLoney
Free of owing anybody anything. My man, my man, my man. Hang on the line. We're going to hook you up with the premium version of every dollar for a year to get you guys. Put a little gas in your jet engine here to get y' all off to the races here. Proud of you. Sell it all, be free of all of it. And then you're going to be building wealth like you can't imagine. Today's scripture of the day is Proverbs 14:30. A heart at peace gives life to the body, but envy rots the bones. Freddie Mercury said, someone will always be prettier. Someone will always be smarter, someone will always be younger. They will never be you.
Caller
I needed to hear that, John.
John DeLoney
Of course you did.
Caller
Thank you.
John DeLoney
You needed to hear both of these.
Caller
I really did. That was actually a really good proverb. I don't know if I've heard that one before.
John DeLoney
That envy rocks.
Caller
That's very rock and roll.
John DeLoney
Yeah. Whoever picked this up for me on the show today, well done.
Caller
Way to go.
John DeLoney
That was a good job. Let's go out to San Antonio, Texas and talk to the Tobes. What's up, Toby?
Dave Ramsey
Hey, how you guys doing? Great to get to talk to you guys today.
John DeLoney
It's great to talk to you too, brother. What's up, man?
Dave Ramsey
I have a very difficult dilemma I need some assistance on. So my mother in law has early stage dementia.
John DeLoney
Ah, ma', am, sorry.
Dave Ramsey
Yeah, they're in their 80s, her husband is wheelchair bound. And give you kind of the financials of it. Basically, memory care is about $6,000 a month starting. She's in the lowest level of care, but each level it goes up, it's another $1,500. They get Social Security of about 4k a month. They have an apartment that the lease is through Until November, it's 2K and they only have $100,000 left.
John DeLoney
Oh my God.
Dave Ramsey
He's not a nice individual. And it's become a huge family conflict all around the money. We did talk a few weeks ago and I agreed basically that, hey, when they ran out of money, I would help them. A week later after that, he's going to my wife asking for money and then now it's telling her to give him money and he's kind of resorted to emotional blackmail. And she's just been very difficult. My wife's about as unhappy I've ever seen her. And we're just kind of struggling for what's the right thing to do. Because honestly, I'm close to retirement and we have big plans for retirement.
John DeLoney
Yeah.
Dave Ramsey
And I frankly, I don't really want to spend all my money. I'm just a little short of my goal, saving my whole life. I don't want to have to turn around and give all that money to take care of, of my mother in law. I know people thought might not like that, but it's kind of where we're at. So I'm struggling trying to figure out what to do.
John DeLoney
So can I just tell you right out of the gate, you got permission to struggle and be upset? Okay.
Dave Ramsey
Yeah.
John DeLoney
When you retold that story, this may not be all of it, but I, I hear in your voice you're more mad that somebody, and I don't care if it's her dad or not, somebody is, is grossly coming after your wife.
Dave Ramsey
That's true. I'm pretty fed up with it. And I, you know, I kind of got into it about a week ago and he called me later and apologized, which is completely unlike him. But it still didn't change anything.
John DeLoney
Okay. Does your wife have any siblings?
Dave Ramsey
She has a sister. She's also just retired. My wife's just retired, but she doesn't make any money. She doesn't have any money. She had a government job and has a very small pension. She lives basically paycheck to paycheck.
John DeLoney
Okay. So I guess what, I want to back out, all the way out. And George can walk you through the specifics here. And I say this with all due respect. Assisted living is a privilege. And assisted living costs money. And if you don't have money, you can't be in assisted living. You can go into a Medicaid facility. If that's all that we have.
Dave Ramsey
Well, that's what we talked about is, hey, let the money run out. Actually, there's some pretty good programs with, with Medicaid. But he is, I think, partly just freaking out of the thought of not having a dime to his name.
John DeLoney
That's true. And that's, that's, there's a mathematical reality to that. And so what, what you. Here, here's the order of importance here. Her order of stats steps. You and your wife turn the phones off and y' all go plan a half day retreat.
Dave Ramsey
Okay?
John DeLoney
And y' all decide what kind of life do we want to have over the next five to 10 years and how much is that going to cost? And both of y' all put your, your pain on the table, your hurts on the table. Let your wife put her guilt. I feel like I have to do this stuff. My guess is she's probably been bailing her dad out emotionally her whole, whole stinking life. And we're going to put all that stuff on the table. You be able to say, I've worked this hard for you and me to have this life in. This bitter, angry, entitled old man is going. And when actually there's a program out there for him. Right. So put all that on the table, all of it.
Dave Ramsey
Okay.
John DeLoney
And then you all decide together. Here's what we're going to do moving forward. We are not going to just wipe ourselves out when there's a program on the table to make this angry 80 year old old not feel whatever he's feeling. Or if y' all decide we're gonna put this much money towards that, then y' all can make that choice. But I want you all to do whatever comes next together. And usually what happens is you get frustrated, frustrated, frustrated. Dad calls out of nowhere, bombs her, she cries, you explode. And then y' all get, y' all go to neutral for a while and then it builds and builds and build. Let's just go to a place and get it all out on the table.
Dave Ramsey
Table.
John DeLoney
Okay.
Dave Ramsey
You are, you're spot on in terms of the emotional roller coaster.
John DeLoney
That's right. And so let's take the explosion. Let's just, let's, let's empty all the gas tanks out of all, all the combustible, you know, liquids. No more gas, no more jet fuel in there. And let's just sit at a table and share a meal and say, okay, we're both frustrated. Neither of us wanted this and here it is. What are we going to decide to do next? And then if y' all decide, hey, dad, we're not funding this. Here's a good, great Medicaid program. We're going to let this money run out and then you're going to move into this place. It's a great place for y'. All. Even if it's not a great, it's the place for y'. All then just expect he's going to yell and kick and scream and throw fits and he doesn't get a vote. He's being well taken care of in the situation that he can afford.
Dave Ramsey
Okay.
John DeLoney
Right. Or if you decide we don't want to fill in the blank, y' all can go from there.
Caller
How have they afforded their life thus far?
Dave Ramsey
Far, they've been very frugal, actually. You know, they live in a person 55 and over apartment complex. It's, it's reasonably Priced and very careful with his money. He's not. Has Social Security and kind of been working through his retirement savings. It's just that he's in his 80s now, and it's. It's about out. So that's. You know, they've never done anything too extreme in terms of cars or trips or anything like that.
Caller
They've been, okay, that's good. So they don't have big expectations of what their life is going to be like at this point. They've. They've looked at the reality of it. I would also look at options B, C, D, and E, because right now the option is either we pay $6,000 a month for assisted living, or they hate us and they're homeless. And the truth is there are way more options than that. So let's look. Hey, what would in home care for a few hours a day be? Like, what does the Medicaid option look like? Let's lay out all the options and then go with the one that makes the most sense, and then we can revisit it six months from now, a year from now. And I think that will just free you of this forever thing and then throwing off your goal, which I also think there's something to that. You mentioned, hey, I'm trying to retire. I've worked my whole life for this. And then a wrench got thrown into the plan.
Dave Ramsey
Right, right, right.
Caller
What is that goal? Was there a certain number?
Dave Ramsey
Yeah, I'm really close to hitting my. My number.
Caller
And, like, are you guys worth $5 million?
Dave Ramsey
No, we're. We're gonna be. My goal is 2.5.
Caller
Amazing. And you're gonna hit that?
Dave Ramsey
Yes.
Caller
Okay. And the truth is, if you were at 2.2, you'd still figure out how to make all that work and have a great retirement. Because you're that kind of guy.
Dave Ramsey
Yes.
Caller
So it hurts because it messes up your spreadsheet. Right. I feel that as the nerd, don't put a ding in my spreadsheet. But you also don't have to feel, like, obligated to cover their lifestyle for the rest of their life, no matter what. What. Because you want to make everyone happy and so on. There's some middle ground here that you guys can afford to help a little bit, but you don't want to open the floodgates and just say, all right, I guess we're going to pay six grand a month for who knows how long. Five years, ten years.
Dave Ramsey
Yeah. Average dementia patients live seven years.
Caller
Exactly. So this could be. You can do the math. And if you want, the question says, how do I convince my wife we can't afford it? Math.
John DeLoney
Math.
Caller
Hey, that oddly looks like 80 grand a year for. For what could be seven years. That's hundreds of thousands of dollars. Which means we can't retire if we do this.
John DeLoney
And also, you know that afford, quote unquote. Afford means different things to you and her. She sacrificed her childhood for this guy. She sacrificed some of the things she wanted to do for this guy. She's willing to say, well, I'll just. I'll just do this now. Right? And I. George, I have a. It's not a hard and fast rule, but if people that I know or care about or whatever need something, I'll be generous for a thing. Not just an endless stream of money.
Caller
Exactly.
John DeLoney
Right. So I can help you out with this. I help you out with this when you call and say, I just need 10,000. I'm not going to do that. So if granddad needs something, maybe we can help out with the thing.
Caller
But not just a one time thing. Not a recurring ongoing fund. My life.
Dave Ramsey
That's different, Sam.
Podcast Summary: The Ramsey Show – Episode: "Stop Making Excuses for Bad Money Choices"
Release Date: August 4, 2025
Host: Ramsey Network
Description: The Ramsey Show empowers listeners to build wealth and regain control of their lives, addressing financial missteps and providing expert advice on overcoming money-related challenges.
The episode kicks off with John DeLoney and George Camel welcoming listeners from Nashville, Tennessee. They encourage audience participation by taking live calls addressing various financial and personal issues.
Issue:
Nancy grapples with her 85-year-old father's recent affair and his intention to move his mistress into her late mother's house. Her father proposes transferring the house to Nancy and her brother if they pay off his reverse mortgage.
Advice:
John DeLoney advises Nancy to distance herself from her father's impulsive decisions, emphasizing the emotional turmoil she's experiencing. He suggests:
Notable Quote:
John DeLoney states at [08:21], "This is not your home," highlighting the importance of understanding ownership and legal rights.
Issue:
Dave Ramsey seeks advice on whether to purchase a $70,000 natural diamond or a $10,000 lab-grown alternative for his engagement ring.
Advice:
John DeLoney critiques the exorbitant expense, pointing out the disproportion between Dave's liquid assets and his investment in a ring. Suggestions include:
Notable Quote:
John humorously likens the situation by saying at [12:20], "Can you live inside of the ring?" underscoring the impracticality of the expense.
Issue:
Crystal survived a severe car accident and received a settlement of $80,000, netting $32,880.37 after expenses. She faces $53,242 in debt and urgent needs for transportation and home repairs.
Advice:
George Camel and John DeLoney guide her through prioritizing:
Notable Quote:
George Camel emphasizes at [19:09], "You can't think like I won the lottery, but think you have a chance to get ahead."
Issue:
Sean is planning to build a $2.5 million house for his autistic daughter and her husband, funded partially by inheriting $50,000 and facing $50,000 in debt. He struggles with balancing debt repayment and fulfilling his grandfather's wishes to provide a home.
Advice:
John DeLoney advises Sean to:
Notable Quote:
John passionately advises at [31:03], "If the house represents freedom to grandpa, then you getting out of debt is the best thing you can do to actually get to the root of what he was wanting, which is that freedom."
Issue:
At 51, Elizabeth is married with an 11-year-old daughter, holding $20,000 in credit card debt. She struggles to balance aggressive 401(k) and 529 plan contributions with debt elimination.
Advice:
John DeLoney and George Camel recommend:
Notable Quote:
John encourages at [80:18], "Shame eats secrets," advocating for transparency within the family to address and overcome financial challenges together.
Issue:
Chuck faces a dilemma between paying off his primary residence using his Roth IRA or purchasing an additional home for his autistic daughter and son-in-law. He is concerned about depleting retirement funds and the implications of managing multiple properties.
Advice:
John DeLoney suggests:
Notable Quote:
John asserts at [102:43], "I would throw it at the consumer debt and the business debt," emphasizing the importance of eliminating high-interest and high-risk debts first.
Throughout the episode, John DeLoney and George Camel reinforce the foundational principles of the Ramsey Plan:
Notable Quote:
At [64:09], George Camel emphasizes, "You got to have a plan. You got to be intentional. And you need to get a budget. You have to tell your money where to go so you're not wondering where it went."
Final Advice:
Both hosts urge listeners to adopt a disciplined approach to managing finances, emphasizing that building wealth and achieving financial freedom require intentional planning, prioritization, and emotional resilience.
EveryDollar App: A budgeting tool to help manage income and expenses efficiently.
Link: www.ramseysolutions.com
Life Insurance Advice by George Camel: Recommendations for level term life insurance and working with independent brokers.
Learn more: Zander Insurance
Home Buyer Edge by Churchill Mortgage: Tools to gain a competitive edge in the housing market.
Visit: ChurchillMortgage.com
NetSuite by Oracle: Cloud-based business management suite recommended for businesses handling complex financial operations.
Explore: NetSuite.com
CH Ministries: An affordable, biblically-based alternative to traditional health insurance.
Find out more: CHministries.org
Conclusion
In "Stop Making Excuses for Bad Money Choices," The Ramsey Show addresses a variety of financial dilemmas faced by listeners, offering pragmatic advice grounded in the Ramsey Financial Peace framework. By emphasizing debt elimination, strategic financial planning, and emotional intelligence, the hosts empower individuals and families to overcome financial setbacks and build a secure, prosperous future.