The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem

Summary

Podcast Summary: The Ramsey Show – "The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem"

Release Date: February 11, 2025
Host: Ramsey Network (Ken Coleman and Jade Warshaw)

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Introduction

In this compelling episode of The Ramsey Show, hosts Ken Coleman and Jade Warshaw delve deep into the transformative journey of financial empowerment. The episode, titled "The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem," emphasizes the importance of recognizing and admitting financial struggles as the first step toward achieving financial peace and stability. Through real-life caller stories and expert advice, Ken and Jade provide actionable insights for listeners striving to overcome debt and build wealth.

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Caller Stories and Discussions

Eli's Struggle with Impulse Spending

[00:34] Ken Coleman: Introduces Eli from Dallas, Texas, who is battling significant financial stress despite following Dave Ramsey's "Total Money Makeover."

[00:39] Eli: "I’m up to my throat in stress trying to be debt-free... I couldn’t resist a $2,100 purchase of headphones."

Key Points:

• Impulse Spending: Eli's challenge with emotional purchases disrupting his debt repayment plan.
• Emotional Roots: Ken probes Eli to uncover deeper emotional issues stemming from a strict and financially constrained childhood.

[02:09] Ken Coleman: Highlights the importance of admitting the inability to manage finances alone, likening it to addiction recovery where admitting the need for help is crucial.

[05:00] Jade Warshaw: Advises Eli to seek counseling to address underlying emotional issues influencing his spending habits. Emphasizes aligning purchases with long-term financial goals, e.g., "What you want most is what you started this journey with—financial peace for your family."

[07:04] Eli: Reveals a total debt of $24,000 across various categories, illustrating the complexity of his financial situation.

[08:03] Eli: Considers selling the headphones or utilizing warranties to mitigate the purchase's impact, demonstrating proactive steps toward financial recovery.

Kelly's Battle with Credit Card Debt and Job Loss

[09:57] Ken Coleman: Transitions to Kelly from Syracuse, New York, who faces overwhelming credit card debt exacerbated by job loss in her field.

[10:16] Caller (Kelly): Explains managing both business and personal credit card debts totaling nearly $60,000, while struggling to secure stable employment.

Key Points:

• Income Fluctuations: Kelly's inconsistent income as an IT consultant contributes to mounting debt.
• Budgeting Challenges: Difficulty in maintaining payments amidst limited savings highlights the necessity of a robust budgeting strategy.

[14:30] Caller: Describes unsuccessful attempts to find alternative employment through waitressing and other jobs, pointing to a lack of persistence and adaptability in job searching.

[15:04] Jade Warshaw: Encourages Kelly to diversify job search strategies, emphasizing resilience: "Don't take 'no' for an answer."

[19:22] Jade Warshaw: Recommends Kelly utilize budgeting tools like "Every Dollar" and read "The Total Money Makeover" to gain perspective and develop effective financial habits.

Jeremiah's Debt from an Auto Loan

[33:57] Jeremiah: From San Antonio, Texas, Jeremiah is burdened with a $33,000 auto loan on a 2022 Dodge Ram 1500, which is currently worth approximately $25,000.

Key Points:

• Negative Equity: Jeremiah is $8,000 upside down on his car loan, complicating his financial situation.
• Income Management: With a monthly income of $2,400 and minimal expenses aside from the car, Jeremiah struggles to bridge the gap.

[35:12] Jade Warshaw: Advises Jeremiah to either aggressively pay down the loan or sell the vehicle to eliminate the financial burden, highlighting the importance of eliminating negative equity.

[36:07] Ken Coleman: Suggests Jeremiah could manage payments by increasing his income through additional work, but concurs with Jade that selling the car may be the more viable option.

[38:43] Ken Coleman & Jade Warshaw: Stress the necessity of budgeting and financial discipline, recommending Jeremiah utilize "Every Dollar" to gain control over his finances and prevent future overspending.

Additional Caller Interactions

• Brody's HELOC Inquiry: Discusses the risks of leveraging home equity for mutual fund investments, with Jade firmly advising against it to avoid unnecessary financial risk.

• Samuel's Educational and Career Concerns: A 20-year-old nearing an associate degree seeks guidance on balancing work and education, with Ken emphasizing practical steps to align career goals with personal passions.

• Brianna's Debt Overwhelm: Couples considering selling their home to manage overwhelming debt receive tailored advice on debt prioritization and income augmentation.

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Key Insights and Takeaways

1. Admitting Financial Struggles is Crucial:

   • Transformation begins with acknowledging the problem, as highlighted by Eli’s emotional admission ([00:34], [02:09]).

2. Emotional Underpinnings of Financial Decisions:

   • Financial habits are often rooted in childhood experiences and emotional responses, necessitating introspection and possibly professional counseling ([03:10], [05:00]).

3. Importance of Resilience and Adaptability:

   • Persistent and diversified job searching can mitigate financial setbacks, as seen in Kelly's case ([14:30], [15:04]).

4. Strategic Debt Management:

   • Prioritizing debts, eliminating high-interest obligations, and avoiding negative equity situations are essential for financial recovery ([33:57], [35:12]).

5. Utilizing Budgeting Tools:

   • Tools like "Every Dollar" empower individuals to track and manage their finances effectively, fostering disciplined spending and saving habits ([05:16], [40:36]).

6. Avoiding Risky Financial Moves:

   • Leveraging assets for investments, such as taking out a HELOC for mutual funds, poses significant risks and is generally discouraged ([32:53], [33:22]).

7. Long-Term Financial Planning:

   • Setting realistic financial goals, such as adhering to the 25% income guideline for mortgages, ensures sustainable financial health and prevents becoming "house poor" ([66:23], [68:05]).

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Actionable Steps for Listeners

• Self-Assessment: Reflect on emotional triggers that drive impulse spending and seek professional help if necessary.

• Budgeting: Implement a detailed budgeting system using tools like "Every Dollar" to monitor income and expenses meticulously.

• Debt Prioritization: Focus on paying off high-interest debts first and consider minimizing or eliminating depreciating assets.

• Income Diversification: Explore additional income streams or side hustles to stabilize finances during periods of income fluctuation.

• Long-Term Planning: Align financial decisions with long-term goals, ensuring that investments and expenditures contribute to overall financial stability and growth.

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Conclusion

"The Ramsey Show" episode, "The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem," serves as a profound reminder that financial transformation starts with self-awareness and the courage to seek help. Through real-life examples and expert advice, Ken Coleman and Jade Warshaw provide listeners with both the inspiration and the practical tools necessary to overcome financial challenges, build wealth, and achieve lasting financial peace.

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Notable Quotes:

• Ken Coleman [02:09]: "The key to transformation is to get to a point where you say, I can't do this on my own. I need help."

• Jade Warshaw [05:16]: "Just because Ken is so right, what you've experienced in your past 100% informs how you view money."

• Ken Coleman [07:04]: "You have to replace the $2,100 headphones with what you want your life to look like 20 years from now."

• Jade Warshaw [25:33]: "Make some extra income, make sure you have resources like the Total Money Makeover to see your story is not unique yet."

• Ken Coleman [66:26]: "You have to think about zip codes and shifting your expectations based on real estate markets."

• Jade Warshaw [85:01]: "You can afford it. You spend more on pizza delivery. You can afford budgeting."

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This detailed summary captures the essence of the episode, providing a clear and structured overview of the discussions, insights, and actionable advice shared by Ken Coleman and Jade Warshaw. The inclusion of notable quotes with timestamps ensures that key moments are highlighted, enhancing the summary's richness and engagement.

Transcript

[Jade Warshaw]

Foreign.

[Ken Coleman]

This is the Ramsey Show, America. It's where we help you win with your money, win in your profession, and win with your relationships. Alongside the fabulous Jade Warshaw, I'm Ken Coleman. Phone number to jump in. Triple eight, eight two five five two two five. Triple eight, eight two fifth five two two five. You ready to roll?

[Jade Warshaw]

Let's rumble.

[Ken Coleman]

Let's go. Eli is joining us in Dallas, Texas. Eli, how can we help?

[Eli]

How are you doing, guys? Thank you for taking my call, man. I'm not even quite sure where to begin, but I seem to have a ginormous problem handling my finances. I am 27 years old with a wife and two kids, and I have one on the way in July. And I'm just kind of like up to my throat in stress on trying to figure out what I got to do to stay the course and trying to be debt free. I've been a part of the show for about six months now. I even bought Dave Ramsey's the Total Money Makeover. And everything was going well. I had baby steps. One, working into two. I had everything listed from smallest to largest, paying the smallest stuff off. And then right around the holidays, I kind of just fell off a cliff, started buying things I didn't need. And just recently, I got into a $2,100 purchase of headphones. What?

[Jade Warshaw]

And what do you mean you got into it?

[Eli]

I did not take very much convincing, to be truthfully honest. I love. I love music and stuff like that, so it didn't take much convincing for me to buy them. I was leading emotionally rather than thinking rationally. And that's when I kind of realized I've got a problem. And I just. I cannot. I just. I can't get out of it.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay, so let me ask a quick question, Eli, on this, because I love how vulnerable you're being, and. And I think you've nailed it. I think you've diagnosed what's going on, that you can't do this on your own. And so we're going to walk with you on this call, but before we dive in deeper, I'm just curious if you'd be willing to share from your gut. What do you think is the emotion that's driving all these impulse purchases for you? What do you think it is? How would you describe it?

[Eli]

I believe desire was probably the best thing I can come up with. Just the sheer desire of wanting to get, you know, anything that I've always wanted. Stuff letting, get when I was growing up stopped.

[Ken Coleman]

There it is. So now we're going to Go deeper for a second. Okay, you said desire, but it's actually something else. What do you think it is based on the fact that you didn't have it when you were a kid and now you want it? What is the deeper emotion? It's deeper than desire. What's driving the desire to get stuff? What do you think?

[Eli]

I don't know.

[Ken Coleman]

You do. It just took us there. Go back to your childhood. What was your childhood like?

[Eli]

Childhood wasn't. Came from a family of divorced parents. Thrusted very quickly into a different setting with my stepfather. And just money was always tight, going up, just not having enough money.

[Ken Coleman]

Didn't have much, did you?

[Eli]

No, no, no. Very strict upbringing. And nothing wrong with that. Of course, it wasn't until I went to Austin for culinary arts for college that I realized that I was free. And I can make any and all decisions. And I've kind of been carrying that philosophy for the better part of the last 10 years.

[Ken Coleman]

But can I tell you something, Eli? You're free philosophically. You're not free emotionally. You're still that little boy who was afraid he was never going to get anything nice like all of his other friends. And so now you're an adult and you're afraid if you don't buy these things, that you are that little boy who didn't have anything. And I'm telling you, there's something there. Now, again, I don't want to make the whole call about this, Jade, but I just felt like when somebody presents as, I can't do anything about this. I think that's right. By the way, if you ever had a friend who's an alcoholic, or if you go through the 12 steps, or you're familiar with 12 steps. The key to transformation is to get to a point where you say, I can't do this on my own. I need help. And he presented that way, and I think that's great. But I also wanted him to see when there's an impulse, the impulse is just the reaction. And you gotta dig deep and go, what is the underlying issue that is making it so easy for him to be talked into 2,100 headphones when he's broke?

[Jade Warshaw]

Absolutely.

[Ken Coleman]

That's real. And, Eli, I'm not saying that to put shame on you. I'm actually hoping to help you see something because I think you can recover from this, but not until you deal with the emotion that is driving the impulse.

[Jade Warshaw]

I agree with Ken. I agree with Ken 100%. Matter of fact, if I were you, I'd probably jump into some counseling and get to the bottom of that. Just because Ken is so right. What we've experienced in our past 100% informs how we view money, how we spend our money, what we think we're entitled to with our money, what makes us feel uncomfortable with our money. All of that is driven by what our relationships have been with money, Whether it's from childhood with our ex wife, our ex spouse, whatever it was. Right. That all plays into it. The. The cute answer that I would give you for this moment, because I'm, you know, I wish I were more of a therapist in that area, but I'm not. But the cute answer is, you've got to get to the point where you're sacrificing. You're not sacrificing what you want most for what you want right now, because what you want right now is the headphones. What I want right now is new Jordans. What I want. Right. There's this thing that we were like, I want this now. But what you want most is what you started out on this journey, which is to find financial peace for your family. Right. And so it's in those moments that you've got to kind of tie back to, okay, what it. What. Why did I start this journey? What is it that I'm truly trying to accomplish? And if I can just keep on the straight and narrow, there will come a time where you can buy the headphones or you can buy some of the things that you want to do. So that's the cute answer. The truth is, you're really struggling to do that right now in this moment.

[Ken Coleman]

Yeah, but I thought you set him up beautifully. Eli Jay just nailed this. I mean, you have to replace the $2,100 headphones with. What do you want your life to look like 20 years from now? That's. She's spot on. What do you want for your kids? And so all of a sudden, you start to go, oh, I want that, and I really want that. You know, it's the trade off. So how much debt do you have?

[Eli]

Me, personally, I have about $24,000 in total debt, about 2500 in credit cards, 7000 is in purchase finances, 4 to 5000 in student loan, and then the rest is personal loans.

[Ken Coleman]

So what. Where did the $2,100 headphones go? Did they go on a credit card?

[Eli]

They went through a firm.

[Ken Coleman]

A firm that's like, buy now, pay one of those.

[Eli]

Buy now, pay later. Yes, correct. Like karna and stuff.

[Ken Coleman]

Can you sell those?

[Eli]

Probably. More than likely.

[Ken Coleman]

So that ain't my world.

[Jade Warshaw]

I mean, you can sell anything. You sell anything.

[Ken Coleman]

I should have said, can you sell those and get a good chunk for or do they devalue quickly?

[Jade Warshaw]

Ah, you could probably. If they're in good shape, I'm sure you could sell them. You can sell them on marketplace or put them. Put them somewhere.

[Ken Coleman]

I'd start there.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah. I'd get rid of it.

[Ken Coleman]

Start selling all the stuff you've bought that you can still sell.

[Eli]

Okay, I got you. I do believe I'd go back. I do believe I have a 30 day warranty of some sort where I can exchange them or return them for a refund. But I'd have to double check on that just to make sure that it's accurate.

[Jade Warshaw]

And let me hit you with something else, eli. I've heard Dr. John DeLoney say this and it's so true. Your stuff talks to you. Your stuff, it does. It talks to you. And I bet you when you walk by it, because you've said what it is that you truly want, let your stuff talk to you and it talk you out of doing this again. Because I bet when you walk by those headphones, they're like you said you were going to make things right with your family, right? When you walk by those purchases, they're telling you everything that you said you were going to do. So by you getting rid of them, selling them off, and it. Let it be a reminder of what you said you wanted to do and start surrounding yourself with things that are telling you the right thing.

[Ken Coleman]

Good stuff. Thanks for the call, Eli. This is the Ramsey Show.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

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[Ken Coleman]

The Ramsey show continues. I'm Ken Coleman. Jade Warshaw is with me. 888-825-5225. Is the phone number 888-255-2225? Syracuse, New York, is where we go next. Kelly is there. Kelly, how can we help?

[Kelly]

Hi.

[Caller]

Thank you for taking my call.

[Ken Coleman]

Sure.

[Caller]

What's going on is I'm trying to figure out what to do with my credit card debt. I have no other debt other than credit card debt. I fell on hard times with work last year, and I've been having a tough time actually landing a job since then. Still working at it, but it's getting harder in the field that I'm in, and I have some business credit cards and some personal credit cards. My business credit cards have been charged off as of last month. My personal credit cards have been current. I've been able to maintain those with the little bit of savings that I've had left with the hopes that I was going to get a job soon, but it hasn't happened yet. So I'm wondering what to do with my personal credit as it's getting harder to pay those balances and the minimum payment.

[Jade Warshaw]

How much is it? How much is the personal credit card debt?

[Caller]

The personal credit card debt is 36,000.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay.

[Caller]

And the business credit cards are 23,000.

[Jade Warshaw]

What kind of business was it?

[Caller]

It's a IT consulting.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay. And are you still doing that or you've moved on?

[Caller]

I'm still doing it because that's what I just been doing for many years. Um, and just really trying to find something where I can make the money that I was making before.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay, so how long were you laid off? Because, I mean, this is almost $60,000 of credit card debt. That's nothing to sneeze at. Like when you say fell on hard times. I want to understand more about that and how long that period lasted so that I can understand more about your habits and your mindset around money and debt.

[Ken Coleman]

And also tell us how much you were making.

[Caller]

Okay, well, my credit card debt racked up really over just maintaining regular monthly bills, which aren't really high. They. They are roughly about a thousand dollars per month.

[Ken Coleman]

Answer Jade's question.

[Jade Warshaw]

How long? Because that means if it was only a thousand dollars, that means we spent 36 months. Yeah. Not doing it.

[Caller]

Almost a year.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay, so what. Okay, so how much.

[Ken Coleman]

Real quick, how much were you making beforehand?

[Caller]

Beforehand, I was making about 10,000amonth.

[Ken Coleman]

But you make it about 120.

[Caller]

Go on. I was going to say it's not 120,000 because I'm a consultant. So it's not consistent throughout the year.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay, how many months of the year do you make? I mean, if you say to me, hey, I make $120,000 a year, yeah, it can fluctuate. But you still made $120,000 in the year.

[Caller]

Um, well, it can go from anywhere, from. You can be unemployed with what I do anywhere from three to six months. If you get a year, then that's nice, but.

[Jade Warshaw]

Right, right.

[Caller]

Three to six months.

[Jade Warshaw]

Right. I hear what you're saying, but it's still $120,000. So what that tells me is on the windfall months, the months that you just had made bank, instead of saying, okay, I've got to be smart and put this aside, and this is what I'm living off of for the next couple months, that tells me that that money went somewhere. Where did it go? Because you also told me that it only takes a thousand dollars to make your household run, which I do have questions about that, but do you see, I'm not trying to take you to task, but there's holes in the story, and I need to understand it so that I can help you best. Because what's coming off. What. The way it's coming off is that you're not working much. That's what the way it's coming off. And I want to find out why that is. Because even if it's not in it, there's plenty of opportunities, and Ken can get into that that we could do throughout the year. And so I really want to highlight that behavior for you so that you never do that again. Does that make sense? It's not for me to, like, make you feel bad. I just want you to know, hey, there's a mo. It's like, you got to know when to hold them and when to fold them. Like, there's a moment that you get to a threshold that you go, I can't keep doing this. I got to go work. I got to get out here and make any kind of money. Right. And something happened that you didn't make that transition. Fair enough.

[Caller]

Well, I did try. It was. Another part of it is that it may sound like I'm not trying. I tried to go to restaurants to see if someone would hire me for waitressing, hosting, different things.

[Jade Warshaw]

And why didn't they? What do you think the reason was?

[Caller]

I mean, I don't want to, really. I mean, I don't know what the reason is. Honestly, I don't know. I know why I can't get a job in my Field. But the reason that I can't get a regular job doing something outside of what I do, I don't know. I mean, I would think anyone can get hired at a restaurant, but apparently not.

[Jade Warshaw]

I mean, but was it just the restaurant or did you go to Walgreens and Target and everywhere? Did you do Doordash? Did you do Uber? Did you do Instacart? And they. They all said, no, I didn't.

[Caller]

I didn't do anything that was not going to be able to pay my bills. Not really.

[Jade Warshaw]

Right. But you hold. Because here's my point. You. Nothing was paying your bills. So isn't something better than nothing? That's the point I'm trying to get to.

[Caller]

I did have unemployment. That's how I was able to pay my rent. My rent was 2,500amonth, so I was paying.

[Jade Warshaw]

That's not true. Because you went into. You had unemployment, but it didn't. It didn't cover the cost. You still had cost because you went into credit card debt. So that's why I'm saying, wouldn't it help to have done some of these other things as well so that you would not have at least had to go into credit card debt? So I'm just trying to play this back because if you can't look back on this and see, here's where I went. Here's where. Where it all went bad. If you can't see that, it will be impossible to fix this.

[Ken Coleman]

So, Kelly, I'm not piling on, but I'm going to jump in here. How many times did you apply for a waitressing position?

[Caller]

Can you be. How many times I applied for a.

[Ken Coleman]

Waitressing position at a restaurant. I know you didn't get the one. How many different restaurants did you apply to?

[Caller]

I went to, like, five different restaurants. I went to another. I went to a bar, went to lounges to try to apply for work.

[Ken Coleman]

Right. So here's the deal.

[Caller]

Maybe there's.

[Ken Coleman]

So. So here. Here's what's going. I was like, what was that?

[Jade Warshaw]

Apparently, my Jane, I don't know, I opened my computer to type something.

[Ken Coleman]

Here's the deal. There could be a myriad of reasons as to why they hired someone else for those roles, but I think what happened was, is that you were like, well, this is just a bunch of no's, and I can't get hired, so I'm going to go try to do my own thing on my own. And you realize how hard that is, and it's put you in a deep hole. I think what we're trying to tell you is, is that you can't take no for an answer. In other words, it's the restaurant, multiple restaurants, a bar. They said no. Fine. You pivot. You go to big box stores where they are hiring. You keep going. You don't accept. Well, I didn't get it here. I didn't get it here, so I'm not going to get it anywhere else. There are jobs that you can get that do way better than unemployment, but you have to keep showing up, and you can't just go in and apply. You got to talk to everybody that you know on social media, in person. You find a job doing whatever it takes to get you on a bridge so that you didn't have to rely on these credit cards. Now you've got to go get work just to dig out of this. And, and I mean, like two or three jobs to dig out of this. Because, Jade, as you said, this $60,000 is no joke. It's a lot of credit card.

[Jade Warshaw]

And let's talk about that a minute, because there's another part of this, Kelly, that when you've, you've been making $10,000 a month. Right. Are you single? You're single, right? She's.

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay. As a single woman, you've been. That. That's significant. Like, that's, that's a lot of money. So to go from that, it almost feels like, well, if I'm not making. It's like an all or nothing thing. Right. You feel like if I'm not making that, then what's the point? And I think what Ken and I are getting at is that's, I get emotionally, that's a very real feeling. But we've got to go beyond that and say anything, anything at this time.

[Ken Coleman]

Until the technology market opens up a little bit. And then what are some adjacent jobs that you're qualified for? Maybe it's different than what you've been doing. My point is you have to treat this like it's life or death, because it is life or death for you financially. Right now, that's where you called us. You are in bad shape, but it's very fixable. If you can begin to get some money coming in the door, you change your budget. I mean, every dollar. I don't know what you want to give her here. She needs some help, she needs some resources.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah. Before, before you leave, we'll make sure you're set up with every dollar, the premium version, because it's going to help you build that habit of budgeting checking in with your money every single day and tracking your transactions. So we'll make sure you have that. I'm also going to give you the total money makeover because I think being able to read that and read other people's stories, you'll be able to see yourself in those stories and you'll be able to pinpoint, like I said, what went wrong here. You'll be able to accept that so you don't end up in this situation again, which is so important.

[Ken Coleman]

Yeah, get after it, Kelly. Everything you got. You don't take no for an answer. A no is just not here and just keep on moving forward. All right, quick break. We'll be right back. This is the Ramsey Show.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

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[Ken Coleman]

Welcome back to the Ramsey show alongside Jade Warshaw. I'm Ken Coleman. Glad you're with us. 8888255225 hey, the best way to make the most of your money is by creating and then sticking to a monthly budget. That's why we created Every Dollar. We believe it is the best budgeting tool on the planet. Help you plan spending, track expenses, save for what matters most to you. And it's easy. You can download every dollar for free in the App Store or Google Play or click the link in our show notes. If you're listening on YouTube or your favorite podcast platform now Our last call. Jade and I were talking during the break. Want to revisit this quickly because Jay got fired up. And, you know, listen, bottom line is, and love Kelly, want to help Kelly. But it is a difficult thing to lose one's job.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yes.

[Ken Coleman]

Or to see an interruption. It just is. Psychologically, we got to call that out. It's difficult. And so it can really throw us off. But there has got to be an awareness of that so that you develop a mindset that if you're in debt or you have been living paycheck to paycheck or both, which is usually the case, you can't allow that to keep you from continuing to bring in income.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yes.

[Ken Coleman]

And it's almost like we had a whiteboard. If we had a whiteboard in the studio, I would have wheeled it in here. I would have given you a fresh marker.

[Jade Warshaw]

I would have gone Steve Kornacki on you in two seconds.

[Ken Coleman]

Come on. So you. I'm looking at your notes here. You jotted down five things that you think people need to do.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah.

[Ken Coleman]

Or why they need to get back to do any work. Set this up for us.

[Jade Warshaw]

I would call it 5 Reasons to Take any job before you get the job.

[Ken Coleman]

I love that.

[Jade Warshaw]

Five reasons. Right. And let me. Let me caveat this real quick, because this is not just Jade sitting here yapping. Right. So during COVID Covid 2020, the pandemic, everything shut down. And for Sam and I, my husband, that was big for us because before I came to work here, I was in entertainment. Our whole business is in entertainment and cruise lines.

[Ken Coleman]

That's right.

[Jade Warshaw]

And all that was shut down. Whole world. And you want to talk about going from a. A great income to zero. Okay? So this is coming experience. I had to take a job that I hated temporarily. It was a call center job. So I get it. Okay. I'm talking out of personal experience. Five reasons to take any job before you take the job. Number one, Ken, some money is better than any money.

[Ken Coleman]

I would agree with this.

[Jade Warshaw]

Right. It's better to. If you're. If you are the person who's like, well, I got to depend on credit cards. Well, if you bring in some money, I guess you won't have to use your credit cards as much. Right. So some money is better than any money. Number two, Ken, Ken, your spouse needs to see who you are.

[Ken Coleman]

Come on.

[Jade Warshaw]

Who you are. Who are you going to be in a hard time when. When the rubber meets the road? Are you going to take any job? And are you going to be the person who Steps up. My husband stepped up, I stepped up, and we needed to see that from each other because it was a hard time.

[Ken Coleman]

Really good point.

[Jade Warshaw]

All right, Your.

[Ken Coleman]

Your spouse, you know what happens. You. You don't feel very psychologically safe when you lose a job. So you need some emotional safety is what you're talking about here. I like that.

[Jade Warshaw]

And if you see your spouse sitting around while you're trying to make things happen or, you know, vice versa, that's not going to be good for the marriage.

[Ken Coleman]

Yeah.

[Jade Warshaw]

So your spouse and you need to see who you are. All right, Number three is, well, you'll learn what you like and what you don't like. Because I can tell you right now, I don't like a call center job.

[Ken Coleman]

What, by the way, what was it? What was it?

[Jade Warshaw]

I mean, I don't know if I can say it on here.

[Ken Coleman]

No, you don't have to say the brand, but what kind of calls were you taking?

[Jade Warshaw]

I was taking people who needed help with their taxes.

[Ken Coleman]

Oh, okay. Got you.

[Jade Warshaw]

So.

[Ken Coleman]

Oh, really?

[Jade Warshaw]

Tax advice? Yeah.

[Ken Coleman]

And did you have like a little cheat sheet of the basics you could help with and then you handed them off to somebody else?

[Jade Warshaw]

No, it was the tax software. So if they had trouble with the tax software. But you have to understand the taxes to be able to do that. So I learned a lot. So I learned. That's what I'm saying. You'll learn what you like, how you don't like.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay, on a scale of 1 to 10, how soul sucking was it?

[Jade Warshaw]

I chose for it not to be soul sucking because like I said, it was 2020. There was enough that was sucking out our soul.

[Ken Coleman]

So my point is, it was. No, but that's you. Because you're mentally tough. I'm saying, how rough was it?

[Jade Warshaw]

It was hard because to go from making. There you go, you know, over 200 and some odd.

[Ken Coleman]

Whitney Houston covers in a fabulous. Probably a nice suite with your hubs traveling all around the world. And now all of a sudden, you're on a. You're. That's not fun.

[Jade Warshaw]

That's the point I wanted. Yeah. I'm saying hello, you sucked it up big time. Sucked it up. You guys suck it up. You got to do what you got to do for your family. Okay?

[Ken Coleman]

Come on.

[Jade Warshaw]

So that was number three. You'll learn what you like, what you don't like. Number four, you'll just be a productive person. Okay. Because sometimes can. You just gotta get out of bed, you gotta take off your sweatpants, hit the pavement, knock on some doors, make some phone calls. Like, you gotta be productive.

[Ken Coleman]

Make something happen.

[Jade Warshaw]

Make something.

[Ken Coleman]

I love it.

[Jade Warshaw]

Otherwise, you're just gonna be getting depressed.

[Ken Coleman]

I love it.

[Jade Warshaw]

About the fact that you don't have a job. All right, which leads me to number five. It'll build your confidence going to a job. I don't care if you're a greeter at Walmart. Getting up and taking pride in what you're doing and being the best at whatever it is that you do. Colossians 3, 23. Whatever it is that you're doing, work at it as though you're working, you know, for the Lord, not as unto man. What? Right. I didn't quote it right, but you know what I'm saying? That works when you do.

[Ken Coleman]

That was a message version. I liked it.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah, it was good.

[Ken Coleman]

It was really good.

[Jade Warshaw]

But that's my point. Like, who wants to show up when you finally do get the interview? It's been five months, and you've not been to a job. You're gonna bomb that interview because you haven't been building that confidence at any job.

[Ken Coleman]

You need to get that typed up, printed out, and dare I say, oh, I just laminated. Thank you. You know where I was going. That needs to be a little. You just pull that chart out, Jay. To be alive or something. That's really good, actually. Really good. All right, let's get back to the phones. But by the way, if you're real quick, I hope you listen to what she said, because that is a fabulous pep talk for somebody who's in between jobs right now. I'm telling you that right. There is a mindset plan that she just gave you. You got to keep your mind right.

[Jade Warshaw]

I know that's right.

[Ken Coleman]

Because you're not going to get out of debt if your mind is destroyed. And it is very, very hard when you've lost steady work. We acknowledge that. All right, to Kristen. We go in Lexington, Kentucky. Kristen, how can we help today? Hi.

[Kelly]

How are you all?

[Ken Coleman]

We're doing great. What's going on?

[Caller]

Jade needs to make that a magnet for sure. Bringing out her inner day.

[Ken Coleman]

Kristen, I love. I love what we're doing here. I need a refrigerator magnet day. I'll be the first person to buy it.

[Jade Warshaw]

Maybe that's my new business.

[Caller]

You know why?

[Ken Coleman]

So she.

[Caller]

So people can see that as soon as I open up the fridge, because we know they go to the fridge like 5,000 times a day.

[Jade Warshaw]

Amen.

[Ken Coleman]

And by the way, I grew up in a magnet household. My mom had them and my grandmother had them. Next door. And so you just took me back, Kristen, to some serious nostalgia. How can we help you today?

[Caller]

Well, I am. Thank you all for taking my call. I'm 39. My husband is 42. Our household income is 100 to 110,000 a year. We've been married for almost 13 years. The. Our net worth is around 1.1. Hey, but that. Yeah, that does include our house. And my husband said that that's really not included. He doesn't include our house.

[Ken Coleman]

We would beg to differ. We would beg to differ. Yeah. What if we included the house? What would it be?

[Caller]

No, that is with the house. He says that we're not over that.

[Jade Warshaw]

Because he wants to see cash money in the bank.

[Ken Coleman]

I appreciate that, but if you sold that house today, you're there, so.

[Caller]

Exactly, we will include it.

[Ken Coleman]

We just won't tell him. Okay, just between us, okay.

[Caller]

We do have a $5,000 emergency fund. I have all of our life insurance through Xander. Like you all taught me, we are avid day fans. We've been trying to live by girls rule ever since we got married. And he. He's lived by that rule ever since he was, like, 14. He said. I didn't listen until I started listening to Dave.

[Kelly]

So.

[Caller]

I have a couple questions.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay, we got. We got about a minute and a half, so you got to get to them real fast.

[Caller]

Okay. I max out our Roth IRA, our 401k, and we contribute about one to 2,000 to a mutual fund, and then the 7,000 max for each of us for our Roth.

[Kelly]

I don't. I don't feel. Where do we go from here?

[Caller]

I feel like, because we're maxing everything out, you know, what do we do from here?

[Kelly]

I'm.

[Caller]

I'm.

[Kelly]

Honestly, I'm getting ready to turn 40. I'm.

[Caller]

I'm a little off. Yeah. And I'm thankful that we don't have any bills. But also, too, our mutual friends. Friends are only going, like, 6 to 8%.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay.

[Jade Warshaw]

Hey, you're doing a great job maxing those out. Your funds should be doing much better than that, especially the past couple years. You should be in the 20s, honey. So I would say suggest you get with one of our smartvestor pros. They're going to get you on the right track and teach you more about the right funds to make you a little bit more money. But, yeah, you're doing the right thing. You could go to a taxable brokerage account. But it sounds like maybe you might want to try something like investing. Maybe it's now time to save up and invest in a piece of real estate that might be interesting for you. It sounds like you're getting a little bored with just setting it aside into mutual funds and that sort of thing. So real estate could be the next play for you guys.

[Ken Coleman]

Not bad at all. Again, go to the SmartVestor Pro section on the website Ramsey Solutions.com make a couple meetings and decide from there. This is the Ramsey Show.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

People tell me about their experiences with big banks all the time. Bad service fees that nickel and dime them to death and predatory lending that tries to catch them in never ending cycles of debt. So if you're ready for a bank that puts people over profits, check out Fairwinds Credit Union. I recommend Fairwinds because they share our Ramsey values of helping people get out of debt and live generously. If you go to fairwinds.org Ramsey you'll see the combined checking and savings account bundle they created just for Ramsey fans. This account bundle is designed to help you take control of your finances and stay out of debt. And Fairwinds also has a great mobile app that's safe and secure so you can manage your transactions with peace of mind. Fairwinds has been helping people avoid big bank traps for 75 years. So go to Fairwinds.org Ramsey to learn more. It's easy to join no matter where you live. That's F a I r w I n d s.org/ramsey.

[Ken Coleman]

Welcome back to the Ramsey Show. I'm Ken Coleman. Jade Warshaw is alongside. Phone number is, call-8825-5225. Jay's gonna coach you up on how to handle your money. I'm gonna coach you up on how to make more money. So let's go. We're gonna start off this segment with a question from our Ramsey Network app. This question is from Brody. He writes, I'm 27 years old and I bought a house about five years ago. I've put a lot of labor into fixing the house and it is worth a lot more than I had originally purchased it for. I just met with my financial advisor and he suggested the idea of taking out $150,000 HELOC on that equity and investing it into a mutual fund to earn more money from my house. Is that the right move or the wrong move for me? And I'm betting Jay that the financial advisor is selling him that product.

[Jade Warshaw]

Oh, 100%. Yeah. He's.

[Ken Coleman]

He's selling you financial advisors. Got himself a commission in his head.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah. The answer is no. I would never do that. Because essentially what you're doing, you're. You're leveraging your home, which is supposed to be a place of peace and security for an investment. And it's like, why would you do that? And in an investment, by the way, there's no guarantee. He didn't say what type of investment. It would be like him investing in the market, which is also something that I'm like, oh, he did say.

[Ken Coleman]

No.

[Jade Warshaw]

He said.

[Ken Coleman]

So essentially, it's like the financial advisor is going, hey, let's put a big lump sum in your mutual fund.

[Jade Warshaw]

He can get a commission, big commission.

[Ken Coleman]

And then he could say, well, you're fast forwarding this.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah, No, I would never do that. I would just take my own income and invest it in mutual funds. And that way I'm not creating any additional risk in my life. I'm holding on to the wealth that I have, which is the equity in your home. And I'm continuing to build wealth by investing 15% of my gross income every single month.

[Ken Coleman]

There you go. All right. To the phones we go. Jeremiah is joining us now in San Antonio, Texas. Jeremiah, how can we help?

[Jeremiah]

Hi. I'm $33,000 in debt, and I've saved up about 3,000, and I just don't know where to go from here.

[Ken Coleman]

What is the debt?

[Jeremiah]

It's from auto loan.

[Ken Coleman]

What's the car tell us about it?

[Jeremiah]

It's a. It's a 20, 22 Dodge Ram. 1500. Yeah, it's gonna hit 70, 000 miles right now.

[Ken Coleman]

And. Okay, 70K. And what is it worth? A private sell right now. If you. If you went on Kelly Blue Book, what would the value be?

[Jeremiah]

I believe it was 26,000 or 25.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay, so let's say 25. And be conservative. And you say you owe 33 on it?

[Jeremiah]

Yes.

[Ken Coleman]

But you also said you have $3,000 worth of cash.

[Jeremiah]

Yes.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay, Jade, $33,000 worth of cash.

[Ken Coleman]

No. No. $3,000. He owes 33.

[Jeremiah]

I wish.

[Ken Coleman]

Yeah, yeah, we do, too. That you had it. So he's got a car that's worth 25. I'm being conservative here. He's got 3,000 in cash. No other cash anywhere else?

[Jeremiah]

No, just.

[Ken Coleman]

I have retirement and no debt other than the truck?

[Jeremiah]

Yes. No.

[Ken Coleman]

Pretty clean here.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah. I mean, if I were you, I try to get out of this by getting out of upside down. What's your income?

[Jeremiah]

Monthly is 2,400.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay.

[Ken Coleman]

You living at home?

[Jeremiah]

Yes.

[Jade Warshaw]

So how quickly could you save up another. Because you're $8,000 upside down. You've got three, so we need five to make it right. Right side up. Right. But then you got to drive something. So we've got to come up with another 3,000 to get you a beater or something. Right?

[Jeremiah]

Yeah.

[Jade Warshaw]

So that's what. That's the equation right here. How quickly can you get another eight, another $5,000 in two months? Three months? Two months. If you take a second job, you live at home.

[Jeremiah]

Yeah, I would. Yeah, I would say about. At least, like, give or take three months. Would take.

[Jade Warshaw]

What bills. What other bills do you have?

[Jeremiah]

What other goals?

[Jade Warshaw]

What other bills other than the car?

[Jeremiah]

Just a 75 for my Internet, I believe.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay. And then what's the car payment? Just so I can really see this.

[Jeremiah]

Now, the car payment is 639, and I paid 300 for the insurance.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay.

[Ken Coleman]

So I kind of would like to see him pay this thing off. It's not like. You know what I mean? There's a couple ways I'd like to see him own this thing and pay it off. He's got no expenses in his life. Pay this sucker. I'm not. I'm not against him selling it. You got this funky face right now.

[Jade Warshaw]

I think he never should have got it.

[Ken Coleman]

I 100% agree.

[Jeremiah]

Oh, I. He knows my grandparents and they co. Signed on it and everything.

[Ken Coleman]

I guess my point is, is I think he could put $2,000 a month on this if he got busy and started working hard.

[Jade Warshaw]

How old are you?

[Ken Coleman]

19. He's living with mom. What do you think? I always tell people to sell it, but in this case, I think he can pay this thing off. He's got no other debt in his life. Now he's got a 2022 Dodge Ram truck. Or you could go buy a beater. I mean, I. I think Jade's right. That's what I almost always say. Sell the car.

[Jade Warshaw]

What do you want to do? What do you want to do, Jeremiah?

[Jeremiah]

Well, if there's any way possible, I would love to keep the truck.

[Ken Coleman]

Well, it is possible. You got to pay it off.

[Jade Warshaw]

But you gotta pay it off with, like, lickety split, like, with the quickness, like you getting another job.

[Jeremiah]

I would hope to read that. I would hope, like three years or two years.

[Jade Warshaw]

And see, this is why I'm saying sell it. Because when I gave you the task of getting $5,000 quickly, you felt like that felt insurmountable. I could tell like that felt like. Oh, man.

[Ken Coleman]

Yeah. See, and let me clarify my position. I'm not saying Jeremiah, over three years, pay it off. I'm saying.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah, yeah, I know.

[Ken Coleman]

I'm saying you pay it off in a, in, in a year. But. But at this point, maybe it's better off if you don't think you can mentally do that. Then I would sell it and I'd go get a five thousand dollar truck because I can find one online right now. I can find a 5000 DOL.

[Jade Warshaw]

I kind of like, plan for you if, if you were a little bit older and you were accustomed to the type of work that Ken and I are talking about, I might say, yeah, keep it paid off. But I can tell that this is really a burden. Even the burden of getting the $5,000 to get right side up feels like a lot. Am I wrong or am I right?

[Jeremiah]

No, you're right.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay, well then 100% I agree. Now those are your two options.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah.

[Ken Coleman]

Pay it down, pay it off quickly, or get rid of it. And I think you need to get rid of it.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah.

[Ken Coleman]

Go ahead and get it out of your life. You're going to sleep better and you're going to learn a valuable lesson.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah, you can't really. It's hard to enjoy a purchase like that when it's kind of made you feel some type of way like that, you know?

[Ken Coleman]

And a $600 month car payment.

[Jeremiah]

I was enjoying it, but I, like, started to learn about, like, the, like, financial things, and I was just like, oh, gosh, I'm living way out of my means.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah, yeah, I hear you. Listen, a RAM is nice. I'm not gonna lie. I've been looking at rams. What color is it?

[Jeremiah]

Black.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay.

[Jeremiah]

Yeah, it's black on black.

[Jade Warshaw]

Listen, slide it this way. You're in San Antonio, you know, and here's the deal.

[Ken Coleman]

Let me tell you what's really going on, Jeremiah. You've never done a budget, have you?

[Jeremiah]

No, I. I've just started, actually, but.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay. Have you used every dollar? Are you familiar with our budgeting app?

[Jeremiah]

I am not.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay, Jade, tell the man why he needs to be using every dollar. Because this will help him.

[Jade Warshaw]

This is great. You're a young guy. This is a great habit to learn early. So every dollar. It's the best budget out there. It's the only budget I use. I know it's the only budget Ken uses, but it's great because it's on your phone, it's on your desktop, and it does all the math for you, Jeremiah. All you have to do is plug in your income at the top and you get to decide from there how you're going to spend every single dollar of your money. So you go in and put everything that Jeremiah might spend money on, from your insurance to your car payment, to, you know, a little bit of groceries for the house, whatever it is that you're spending money on, you put that into every dollar and then it's going to tell you, hey, here's how much extra you have to spend. So that's just the basics of what every dollar does. You connect it to your bank and then all your transactions load in there and it'll tell you, hey, here's how you're doing with your money. But there's also some really great future planning tools in there so you can.

[Ken Coleman]

Help him save for that next truck. That's maybe in the fourteen thousand, fifteen thousand dollar range. Jeremiah, that's the whole point is get this out of your life, then start budgeting and then you can begin to see. Okay, I'm still a young guy. I can save up and have a really nice truck in the near future that doesn't have any negative emotion attached to it, right?

[Jeremiah]

Yes, sir.

[Ken Coleman]

That's the idea, my man. So every dollar, download it today, start messing around it to learn this at 19.

[Jade Warshaw]

Oh, you're going to.

[Ken Coleman]

I don't think I'm speaking in hyperbole, but I think he's going to be way ahead. Way past most 19 year olds just learning to go, I know where my money is.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah.

[Ken Coleman]

And not only do I know where it is, I'm controlling where it's going.

[Jade Warshaw]

And being able to make the choice. Hey, I, I bought that. It was too expensive. I don't need to keep it. Being able to say that in life, I agree. Priceless.

[Ken Coleman]

It's huge. By the way, selling a car that you can't afford it is the best way to get out of that deal. Learn that lesson the hard way. It's. It just kind of sticks with you forever. Always the best choice. Great hour, Jade Warshaw. This is the Ramsey Show.

[Rachel Cruze]

You know how when you go against what society thinks is, quote, normal, like avoiding debt, it feels weird at first? Well, I'm here to tell you that is okay. I want you to be weird if that means you're being intentional, including how you budget. And one way to be intentional about how you spend your healthcare dollars is with Christian healthcare ministries. CHM isn't health insurance. They're a biblically based alternative. CHM is a health cost sharing ministry that's helped hundreds of thousands of families take care of healthcare costs without sacrificing their freedom as a CHM member, you'll share 100% of your eligible healthcare costs with a dedicated Christian community. And in return, your monthly contribution goes towards other members medical costs. So no matter where you are in your financial journey, CHM can help you reach your money goals and still get the care you need. Plus, programs start as low as $98 a month. So go to chministries.orgbudget to find out more. That's chministries.orgbudget.

[Ken Coleman]

Welcome to the Ramsey Show, America, where we help you win with your money, win in your profession, and win in your relationships. 888-825-5225 is the phone number. 888-255-2225 Love for you to call in. And if you need to get coached up on handling your money, Jade Warshaw is here. If you need to get coached up on making more money, I'm here. I go by Ken. That's what I go by. I've been called far worse, but I go by Ken. Ken Coleman with you and always fun to be with Jade. And we've got the energy here. We both just got a little bit of caffeine. We got the juice. We're ready to go. Lily in Milwaukee is where we're going next. Lily, how can we help today?

[Kelly]

Hi. So I need advice on what to do. So this we just realized that my mother in law has stolen from my husband and I for the second time. The first time was last. Yep. The first time was last year that we discovered it. My husband's debit card numbers kept getting stolen even after he changed it six times. Come to find out it was my mother in law. She stole every time he was home. She somehow went to his wallet and grabbed his debit card, wrote down the numbers. She used it to pay bills. I mean it was, she also used.

[Jeremiah]

It for.

[Kelly]

We tracked $1,000 and then we stopped tracking it because you didn't.

[Jade Warshaw]

Want to keep, you didn't want to keep getting.

[Ken Coleman]

How long did this go on before the second time that it's happened? How long did it go on for before you figured it out?

[Kelly]

I, I would say four months before we realized it. I actually realized it when I was looking over my husband. Well then we were just dating or engaged, I can't remember. And he was just showing it to me and I was just like, let's really read it. How did you look at it? And I said, wait, these are all utility bills. So someone's paying utilities. And he's like, oh, okay. So we looked and my husband Like a couple days later found a utility bill that was paid with the last four digit of his car in his mom's name. So we confronted her.

[Ken Coleman]

Well, how'd that go?

[Kelly]

Confronted her.

[Ken Coleman]

How'd that go?

[Kelly]

Not well. Not well. She unfortunately is an alcoholic. And so it's rough, especially because just under a little over a month ago, we were ready with $5,000 cash to bail her out of her sixth OWI because otherwise her son was going to be her. My brother in law, who's now 17, was going to be put in foster care and we were going to be his foster parents up until he turned 18.

[Jade Warshaw]

Oh, wow.

[Kelly]

And so we didn't. We were going to like, okay, we're going to bail you out. We. And we even told her, like, this is a gift. We don't want you to return it. Like, this is just rough. So she was ordered to not leave and were driving a total of six hours a day. When I say we, I mean me, because my husband was working and I would drive an hour to pick her up, an hour to drop her off from her home to then work, and then an hour back and then I would go back and I would go get her. And we finally stopped after we found out she was driving when she wasn't supposed to. And so we said, we're not going to be complicit in this. We're not going to turn you in, but we're not going to be a part. Part of our bargain to not asking for any money back was that you didn't break the law again.

[Ken Coleman]

So this is a giant mess. We could talk about this for. Okay, and what's your question for us today?

[Kelly]

We need help with the current situation of her stealing $13,000 from his UTMA account.

[Ken Coleman]

His.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay, her stealing $13,000 from HIS UTMA, is it whose name is on it? Did she set up a long time ago for him?

[Kelly]

Yes, she set it up for him. He was in a really bad car accident. So because he was a minor, the money was then dispersed to her. And then at the same time they were hurt, his parents were going through a divorce. So part of the custody agreement was instead of just giving the money and letting it sit in a bank account, put it in an upma, like trust. So she did that. And then in 2008, she took out a little over six grand. And then in 2015, she took out another a little over six grand of a total withdrawals of $13,186.43.

[Ken Coleman]

No, we get it. She's got access to this, though.

[Kelly]

She did. Yet. So now my husband's 22 and has. Right. And so when we talked with our accountant and we talked to the investor, she's not. According to like, utma, IRS stuff or whatever that we are being told is that she can't pull out any money unless it's to benefit the minor.

[Ken Coleman]

What she just did.

[Jade Warshaw]

So you could sue her. I mean, you could.

[Ken Coleman]

I got a question. How, if that's true, then how is it that she just recently was able to get into the account and get 13,000 more dollars?

[Kelly]

No, no, no, no, no. That was the total amount. It wasn't recently that she did it. She did it in 2008 once, and then 2015. We only found out now.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay. All right. So, Lily.

[Kelly]

Okay, now being mailed to my husband.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay. So there's a lot coming at us. So you've done. So she. No, it's okay. But to try to help you, she. What you just told us seems like the solution. What you just told us. She can't get access to this now. Correct. Because of his age.

[Kelly]

Right.

[Ken Coleman]

All right, then. So you don't have anything to worry about.

[Jade Warshaw]

Unless, like I said, unless you were trying to get the 13,000 back. If that's the case, you'd have to take legal action to prove that she took it, that she didn't spend it on him. Right.

[Kelly]

I just don't even know how to prove that. Like, my point.

[Jade Warshaw]

My point in saying. My point in saying that is it's probably not going to be worth it.

[Ken Coleman]

No, this is not worth it. She doesn't have any money.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah.

[Ken Coleman]

And the last thing you guys need to do is spend your money on a wild goose chase, because that's what this is. This is already awful enough. So if that's your question for us.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay.

[Ken Coleman]

Jade and I are saying if we.

[Jade Warshaw]

Were in your shoes, you can't for anything.

[Ken Coleman]

We'd let it go. But I would make sure that. That your husband is on the phone with this account.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah.

[Ken Coleman]

And we're absolutely for certain that she cannot access the funds. The second thing is, I could go back to the initial thing. He doesn't go anywhere near her with his card. With his debit card anymore.

[Jade Warshaw]

Right. How did this happen to laying his.

[Ken Coleman]

Wallet around and she's just walking into this? So.

[Kelly]

No, what had happened was he. It was while he was still living there. So we didn't move in together until after we were married, and he lived with his mom. When we found out about it, he did end up getting an apartment for six months, and then we moved in together because we were married.

[Ken Coleman]

Lily, this just needs to be a clear boundary here. This needs to be a clear boundary. We don't do anything with her anymore involving money, Period. Done. She needs to get healthy, and she may have to hit rock bottom. It doesn't sound like she's there yet.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah. Has she ever gone through any treatment for her alcoholism?

[Kelly]

She was court ordered, too, with the other five OWIs, but it never ended up helping or doing anything. Unfortunately, she did the program enough to get the boys out of foster care when they were removed from her care. And then as soon as she got them back and the court order was finished, she went back to drinking.

[Ken Coleman]

Where's little brother now?

[Kelly]

He is still living with mom.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay. All right, well, this is. This is tough. We feel really bad for you. I'm glad you have figured it out. I don't think there's any recourse. I think you guys need a clear boundary here.

[Jade Warshaw]

And I think. You know what? I love therapy. So I would suggest you and your husband go talk to someone. Because when people do you wrong like that, and your husband's probably bringing in his own baggage from that living situation, like, you guys, get some clarity and get some mental healing over this, because clearly what she's. Her actions have impacted you guys, and it's made you feel some type of way, like, understandably so. But make sure you're working through that, too, so that when the time comes that she does become sober, which I pray it does, you can receive her with open arms.

[Ken Coleman]

Also, Lily, best we can do is give you a present. Hang on the line. We're going to give you every dollar because this happened because you guys largely didn't have any idea what was coming and going in your bank account. I'm not trying to pour insult, you know, on the injury here, but let's get control of our budget so that nothing like this ever happens again. Hang on the line. This is the Ramsey Show.

[Travis]

Have you gotten one of those texts recently claiming to be the USPS with some sketchy link to update your address? It's annoying and a little terrifying, and you probably think to yourself, I should do something about this, but where do you even start? Well, as your nerdy friend who does the research for you, I found the solution. They're called Deleteme. And here's the reason they come in the clutch. The Internet is packed with data brokers, which are these shady companies whose sole purpose is to collect your personal info and sell it for a profit. Enter Deleteme. Deleteme swoops in, finds your info on these sites, and removes it on your behalf. They even send you a report with all the details. And so far, for me personally, they have reviewed 27,000 listings, removed my info from 240 data brokers, and and save me 66 hours in the process. I trust Deleteme to help protect my family. And I trust them to help you, too. You're gonna get fewer spam texts, fewer phishing emails, and fewer creepy robocalls. And Delete Me also makes a great gift for other people in your life that you care about. Individual plans start at just $9 a month, so take an easy step to protect yourself and your loved ones today. And as a Ramsey fan, you'll get an extra 20% off any of their plans. @joindeleteme.com that's joindeleteme.com Ramsey.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

It's that time again, folks. Tax season is here. I know some of you would rather bury your head in the sand until April 15th than face your taxes. But here's a better idea. If your tax situation is complicated, get in touch with a Ramsey trusted tax pro today. That way, they can take the stress off your shoulders once those tax forms come in and teach you how to keep your tax bill as low as possible. But don't wait. Ramsey trusted pros can book up fast. Go to ramseysolutions.com taxpro to find one who serves your area with excellence. That's ramseysolutions.com taxpro.

[Ken Coleman]

Welcome back to the Ramsey show alongside Jade Warshaw. I'm Ken Coleman, triple 882-55-5225 is the phone number. Let's go to Washington, D.C. samuel's there. Samuel, how can we help?

[Jeremiah]

Hi, Jayden.

[Ken Coleman]

Ken, how are you?

[Jeremiah]

I'm good.

[Ken Coleman]

Good.

[Jeremiah]

I guess my question mostly surrounds finishing school and my career in the future.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay. Tell us where you are in school and how far along you are and what you're pursuing.

[Jeremiah]

Yeah. Right Now I'm about 16 credit hours away from getting my associates in business.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay.

[Jeremiah]

But I'm not taking any classes this semester.

[Ken Coleman]

And what is the reason for that?

[Jeremiah]

Yeah, I'm working quite a bit of hours. I work every day. And by the time I. In truth, by the time that I was looking to sign up for classes this semester, all the ones remaining for my program were booked up.

[Ken Coleman]

And what kind of work are you doing now?

[Jeremiah]

Yeah, I'm a manager and coach at a gym.

[Ken Coleman]

And is that the field you want to go into?

[Jeremiah]

It's tough. I've kind of. I'm kind of at the ceiling of this stuff. Only kind of way to go up would be owner, equity owner.

[Ken Coleman]

Right. But if you. If Young Samuel. How old are you again?

[Jeremiah]

20, sir.

[Ken Coleman]

20. If young Samuel thinks about the future 20 years from now. And we're going ideal here, all right? So I don't want you to be hung up on a lack of belief right now. Don't want you to feel insecure about your answer. I want you to go with what your heart's telling you. What does it look like right now? You can Change this answer two minutes from now. What's 20 years down the road a successful Samuel and I run into you, and you go, hey, years. Twenty years ago, I talked to you and Jake. Guess what I'm doing now. What would you tell me you're doing?

[Jeremiah]

Yeah, I'd love to either have some sort of remote work in a field that I really enjoy, or I really like to get into real estate investing and kind of manage.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay. I feel like I got. I feel like I got a safe answer, and I feel like I got the real answer.

[Jade Warshaw]

He's not a real office guy.

[Ken Coleman]

Don't tell me that 20 years from now you're going to be excited to run into Jade. And I go, hey, I'm doing remote work in a field I enjoy. Come on.

[Jade Warshaw]

What that told me is he doesn't want to go into an office. Whatever he does, he wants flexibility.

[Ken Coleman]

I know I'm pushing him a little bit because he can handle it. Samuel, what is it that you really want to do?

[Jeremiah]

I really just want to make my friends and family happy and spend time doing things that I enjoy.

[Ken Coleman]

I know you're a sweet young man. Jade wants to give you a big, giant hug. Mama. Jade is so touched. But, Samuel, you want to do real estate, you want to be an entrepreneur. You want to be kind of on the move, working for yourself. Is that the goal?

[Jeremiah]

Yes, sir.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay. So until you figure out what it is that this entrepreneurial adventure or 2 or 3 or 4 may be, then I think you ought to be working. I think you ought to be working because you don't need an associate's degree to be an entrepreneur. You don't have a very clear direction as of this time, which, by the way, I'm not judging that at all. And so for me, I. I don't think you should be feeling any kind of negative emotion about taking this semester off. Now, if you figure out what you, you know, you start to get some more Ideas. And by the way, I'm going to give you some tools. I'm going to give you my book, find the work you're wired to do, and it has the get clear assessment in it. It'll take you about 18 to 20 minutes to take. Will you do it? Yes, sir. Because it's going to give you a purpose statement. And it's basically go. I was created to use the top three talents. And it's going to go boom, boom, boom. It's got a detailed report on each of the three top talents. Then it's going to say to you to do the work that I really enjoy doing. It's going to give you three passions. Boom, boom, boom. And a detailed report on all three to accomplish my mission of. And it's going to give you one clear answer, which is a result that would get Samuel out of the bed every morning. Now, that's just a quick preview. But if you take it and you look at that purpose statement and you begin to lay it out over the world of work. Okay. And you begin to allow yourself to answer the question that I put you under the spot. Okay. I put you on the spot. I know it was a little pressure, but if you continue to work through that same question with that purpose statement in mind, I think at some point you're going to come to some conclusions on two or three ideas that would absolutely allow you to use what you do best to do what you enjoy to produce a result that you care about. Isn't that what you really want, Samuel?

[Jeremiah]

Thank you so much, Tanya.

[Ken Coleman]

So here's the deal. I am all for 19 year olds working and making some money. Mama J. I know that's right. And taking his time and figuring out because he's not playing video games all.

[Jade Warshaw]

Day long, he's being productive.

[Ken Coleman]

He's hustling. This kid's got a heart the size of the Atlantic Ocean. So, Samuel, I would say pause.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah.

[Ken Coleman]

And then we jump back into school. And here's why. Jade, I want to give it to you to weigh in, because you need to listen to Jade. If school, a degree, whether it be an associate's, a bachelor's grad degree at all, Jade, if it is the only way to do what you want to do, I say do it.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah.

[Ken Coleman]

If it is the best way to do what you want to do, I say do it. But absent of those two very clear descriptors, then I say stay away from it because you are wasting time and money. This idea that college is. It's so good for the Young people to go find themselves.

[Jade Warshaw]

That's an expensive way to find yourself.

[Ken Coleman]

Summer camp on steroids. You can go party on your own. Jane, what say you?

[Jade Warshaw]

I think that you're exactly right, Ken Coleman. I think that that's a message that needs to be shattered from the rooftops.

[Ken Coleman]

I mean, look, there's just. It's as simple as that. So, Samuel, I hope that's what you need. Is that what you needed today? You needed. You didn't need anything from us. But I hope we answered your question.

[Jeremiah]

Yes, I really appreciate it.

[Ken Coleman]

All right, my man, hang on the line. Chris is going to get you a copy of the book. Find the work you're wired to do. And it comes with the assessment, the get clear assessment. By the way, that little book is about a 45 minute rejade. It's me coaching people through their assessment results. So I need it. I do believe passionately in that product. So. Especially for young people who, by the way, there is this massive cultural pressure to go right out of high school and get accepted by a really great school so that you make your parents and your principal and your teachers proud. And there's a lot of Samuels in this world who are a lot like Ken Coleman.

[Jade Warshaw]

Mm.

[Ken Coleman]

And we were like, that thing I want to do doesn't need a degree. I'm a college dropout because I was working. I went to school to get a political science degree because I wanted to run the world. You know what I'm saying?

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah, I know.

[Ken Coleman]

No surprise there. And I got a taste of politics. I got to work on a campaign in the middle of my sophomore year, and I took a whole semester off. And I tasted battle, folks.

[Jade Warshaw]

Hey.

[Ken Coleman]

And then I went back to school and was like, this is the desk job. And I've been in the foxhole. And I was never the same. And thankfully, my parents did not freak out. They weren't happy about it.

[Jade Warshaw]

What'd they do?

[Ken Coleman]

They just kind of were like, okay, well, we'd like you to finish your degree.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Ken Coleman]

Because another year and a half later, I dropped out to work on a senate race. Then I went right to the gubernatorial race, and I found myself working for the governor of Virginia at 22.

[Jade Warshaw]

That's cool.

[Ken Coleman]

So it wasn't like I was, you know, finding myself in Europe back, but you could.

[Jade Warshaw]

You could find yourself in Europe.

[Ken Coleman]

And I got no problem with that either. Yeah, I was a big fan of a gap year.

[Jade Warshaw]

I wish I had found myself as a dropout. Listen, I stayed in school too long.

[Ken Coleman]

Yeah. But you were a D1 athlete. You're far more higher achiever than.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yes, but I. I quit volleyball to pursue music. Yeah. In my studies. But I didn't, I didn't need to continue in school.

[Ken Coleman]

No, you did not.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah, but I wish I had taken the Ken Coleman path of action. It would have been right for me.

[Ken Coleman]

I went into the field that I was going to school to get into the field for. I hope everybody understands that. I mean, I'm not saying that everybody drop out of school. No, we get you can, but my goodness, why in the world would I.

[Jade Warshaw]

Finish Everybody is what you're saying. Like, it's not the pathway for everybody.

[Ken Coleman]

People used to ask me all the time, you going to go back and get your degree? I was like, for what? I got a fancy office.

[Jade Warshaw]

I know, right?

[Ken Coleman]

I'm wearing suits every day.

[Jade Warshaw]

You know what?

[Ken Coleman]

I'm not going back to college for a political science degree or I am sciencing the political.

[Jade Warshaw]

What do you think about folks who really view it, though? Like, it's just. I want to do it to say I did it. Like, it's just.

[Ken Coleman]

It's that important to you? Pay it cash.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah.

[Ken Coleman]

But I would say to them privately, that's important to you. I'm not going to knock your priorities. I go, you don't need it.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah, yeah.

[Ken Coleman]

I'm just one of these guys that doesn't do anything that I don't need to do.

[Jade Warshaw]

Listen what I get you.

[Ken Coleman]

Why do I need a degree?

[Jade Warshaw]

My degree helped me meet Sam Warshaw. That's all that matters. That's what I tell myself at night when I'm thinking about the student loans I paid off.

[Ken Coleman]

And tell people what you thought of Sam the first time you met him.

[Jade Warshaw]

I said that right there is a snack.

[Ken Coleman]

My all time favorite thing she says about he's become a good friend. One of these days I'm going to tell him you're a snack. He's going to probably punch me, but it'll be worth it.

[Jade Warshaw]

Face card never declines. You heard it here first.

[Ken Coleman]

We love you, Sam. This is the Ramsey Show.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Listen, people, what you call organized chaos is still chaos this year. Build some room in your budget to get your life really organized. One tool that I recommend is a knockbox. As in next of kin. Knockbox is a complete system that helps you organize important documents, accounts, IDs, tax returns, insurance policies, estate plans and other personal history in one secure place. The 15 categories in your knockbox cover everything from health history and investments to your ancestry and even collectibles so cut the clutter with a knockbox. Start getting organized today and receive an exclusive [e-mail] that's n o k box.com.

[Rachel Cruze]

Ramsey hey guys, Rachel Cruze here. All right, I'm about to say what everyone already knows, but budgeting is a good thing to do now actually starting well, that's where people freeze up. And you guys, it doesn't have to be that way. With the EveryDollar budgeting app, getting started is super easy and so is sticking to it. You can set up your first budget in less time than it takes to go through the chick fil a drive thru. It's fast. And the best part, with unlimited budget categories, you can customize it to fit your life. Grocery runs, coffee runs or planning your next family trip. Whatever you have going on. Everydollar helps you see exactly what's happening with your money. You'll know what's coming in, what's going out and what's left over for some fun. Because let's be real, you need some fun in your budget. Everydollar keeps budgeting simple and stress free, just the way you want it. So go download the app for free and get started today. Again, go download EveryDollar today.

[Ken Coleman]

Welcome back to the Ramsey Show. Thrilled to have you with us, helping you win with your money, win in your profession and winning your relationships is our goal. 8888255225 is the phone number to jump in. I'm Ken Coleman. Jade Warshaw joins me. Why refi refinances defaulted private student loans and builds a custom loan based on your ability to pay? Private student loans are different than federal student loans like Sallie Mae. So to learn more about this custom refinancing option and a lump sum payoff option you could qualify for after 24 months, go to yrefi.com Ramsey that's the letter. Yes. Refy.com Ramsey it may not be available in all states.

[Jade Warshaw]

All right, today's question comes from Travis in Vermont. He says I'm 23 and saving for a home down payment which should only take 12 to 18 months. However, I've heard that you recommend not having a mortgage of more than 25% of your take home pay. Even if I went, even if I were to save enough for a 20% down payment, I wouldn't be able to get a mortgage anywhere near that. I earned 70,000 per year, which is above average for coming straight out of college. There are no starter homes in this area for less than 150,000. Do you think young people will ever have a chance at purchasing a house if we stick to your 25 guideline? All right.

[Ken Coleman]

Oh, that's a good question. Yeah.

[Jade Warshaw]

Let's talk about it from a couple of angles. Number one, I love that you want to buy a house. I think that's great. I think the dream of real estate is, is the American dream, right? To own something that's yours outright. It's great. What you first said was you could save for a down payment in 12 to 18 months, which lets me know whatever you had in your mind. You thought I this number will get me in the door, but the door that it's going to get you in is a dangerous door for you. The reason that we say 25 of your take home pay is because we want you to be able to live like we want you to be able.

[Ken Coleman]

To breathe out here because, you know, the house poor.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah. At some point you have to think about like this. At some point of the 100% pie of income that you have, at some point you're going to want to invest 15%. So there's that. At some point you're going to want to give 10%. So there's that. That's already at 25. At some point you have a mortgage. Let's say it's more than 25%. Let's say it's at 40%. Well, suddenly you don't have much to live off of. Right. You've really cut that wedge really, really small for you. And we find people all the time who call in and say, oh my gosh. I mean, it happened the other day, Ken, folks calling at 50% because they'll give you a mortgage up to 50%.

[Ken Coleman]

Oh my goodness.

[Jade Warshaw]

And when that happens, these people can't breathe. Like they can't pay for a pot to piss in. Like they don't have anything.

[Ken Coleman]

One of my all time favorite phrases, by the way, you dusted that one. That's like an old school. From the depths it did. That's like an old school phrase.

[Jade Warshaw]

I think I probably heard my dad say it. But I promise you anyway, you know, that's the point. It's not. It has nothing to do. It has nothing to do with being a Ramsey ism. Right?

[Ken Coleman]

That's right.

[Jade Warshaw]

It's about you. We want you to be able to live.

[Ken Coleman]

So there's margin and emotion attached to that margin.

[Jade Warshaw]

And so that's kind of what I want you to leave here with. It's not about us, it's about you being Able to enjoy your home and have the money to do the things that you need to be able to do. So that's thing one. Now let's answer the question of, do you think single people will ever have a chance at purchasing a house if we stick to your 25 guidelines? The answer is yes, but comma, and you'll have to change your expectations on possibly the piece of real estate and the timeline that it will take to get you there.

[Ken Coleman]

That's right. And the zip code.

[Jade Warshaw]

And the zip code. All these things come on.

[Ken Coleman]

And what you grew up in doesn't mean that that's what you're supposed to start in facts. That's the biggest thing.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah.

[Ken Coleman]

It's like, well, you grew up in a four bedroom, three car garage and you think that that's what you're supposed to start with. And I'm like, at 23, I think a lot of people do think you're right. And it's like, wait a second. I mean, the first house Stacy and I started with, it was, it's like a matchbox compared to what we live in now. And we thought it was massive and scared to death of it. By the way, it's $198,000. Wow. I thought and I thought, and by the way, I did it by the book, the down payment, the way Ramsey teaches about. But I thought I had mortgaged my life away because of the sheer price of the home.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yes.

[Ken Coleman]

$198,000. Back then, that was like I thought I was going to die.

[Jade Warshaw]

And that's so important to note, Ken. So important. Despite what your monthly payment for the mortgage might be, you still that first home, you feel the weight of whatever. The entire amount, even though we put.

[Ken Coleman]

A nice down payment on it was over 20, but it still felt like, what have I done?

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah.

[Ken Coleman]

So there's a responsibility there, which by the way, makes me think I want to just add one thing. I thought your answers were great. This is why we created what I think is one of the best resources we've ever created at Ramsey. And by the way, it's all free. It's called Ramsey's Real Estate Home Base. So anybody watching and listening right now, this is free and it's absolutely chock full of. It's a podcast on there, we've got a book on there, we've got a video series, how to articles, start to finish guides on buying or selling anything real estate related. If you're kind of going, what do I do? Yes, and you trust us, go to Ramsey Solutions.com real estate. Let me say that again. Ramsey Solutions.com real estate. If you couldn't write it down, can't remember it. Go to the show notes for today. It's there very important that you understand what all is involved here. So really good question.

[Jade Warshaw]

And can let me drive that down. Let me drive this point home one more way.

[Ken Coleman]

Drive it down the lane.

[Jade Warshaw]

There's always, there's always a new listener. Someone who doesn't know our background, backgrounds. Right. So my husband and I, I, I loved this question because right now the real estate, it's gotten more and more expensive. It started to cool out in some areas. But the truth is it is very expensive. And with other things being expensive, inflation and things like that, it does make it feel harder to be able to accomplish this dream. That is the truth.

[Ken Coleman]

Well, the numbers have gone up. You're right about that. It is a high level.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah. And so I like to remind people when my husband and I were getting out of debt, of course, of course we couldn't buy a house during that time because we say you should really pay off your debt before you become a first time home homeowner. And so Sam and I rented Ken for 10 years and during the course of that 10 years we paid off $460,000 of debt and then we saved up and were able to.

[Ken Coleman]

Do you know people living with you too? I feel like you say what? Didn't you have a bunch of people living with you too?

[Jade Warshaw]

Not a bunch of folks. We had roommates at one point. We did.

[Ken Coleman]

That's what I'm saying. I'm not knocking that.

[Jade Warshaw]

We had, we were married and we had another married couple that lived with us for a year.

[Ken Coleman]

I thought that was extreme.

[Jade Warshaw]

10 out of 10 would not recommend Ken.

[Ken Coleman]

But you did it.

[Jade Warshaw]

We did it.

[Ken Coleman]

But the point is I said a bunch of people.

[Jade Warshaw]

I'm sorry, it kind of sounded like we were just on the block. Coming through. I living in a shoe. No, it, it just reframing like a time frame. If it takes 10 years, so be it. You'll be, you'll be a homeowner. I can tell you. You will.

[Ken Coleman]

And here's the key. Actually, I'm really glad you brought that up because I think some people right now are still going 10 years. Before you throw shade at my friend, I want to bring this back to you because that 10 years of rent I'm sitting here with you today and I'm going to take a guess that you don't feel like you pissed that money away.

[Jade Warshaw]

Not at All.

[Ken Coleman]

So what did the 10 years of rent, which some people right now are on tik Tok Instagram going, yeah, yeah. How did that 10 years of renting give you freedom to get to where you are today? Break it down.

[Jade Warshaw]

Well, a. I don't regret it at all. Like, here in my life. I'm 41 years old. I don't go, oh, man, if only I had bought my house when I was 23. Like, there's no part of me that thinks back right in regret at all.

[Ken Coleman]

Why?

[Jade Warshaw]

Because it was worth it to do things right. You took seven. We took seven and a half years, paid off all the debt. Then we took. We lollygagged a couple years. Cause we were tired. Took some more time to save up. That's.

[Ken Coleman]

Well, you were paying off half a million dollars.

[Jade Warshaw]

That's right.

[Ken Coleman]

You deserve a water break.

[Jade Warshaw]

Took some time to save up. And then when we finally bought our house, I was pregnant, I just had my first son, and I was 36 years old. And it was great.

[Ken Coleman]

And now here you are. Homeowner.

[Jade Warshaw]

Homeowner. I'm on my second house.

[Ken Coleman]

People think that that's wasting money. And in your case, it was actually the freedom and margin you needed to get out of debt.

[Jade Warshaw]

That's right. Because it was far cheaper. It was far cheaper for us to rent. We had a season of roommates and it freed up money. And like we said before, the last thing I needed was more stress of then feeling like, okay, now I've also got this mortgage that I have to, you know, be accountable for.

[Ken Coleman]

So, Ken, craziest thing that happened that you're willing to share when you had another married couple, roommates or most awkward.

[Jade Warshaw]

I think one time we came home and they had bought a home alarm. An alarm for the. The house. And so Sam and I came home from a trip we had been working, and when we open up the door.

[Ken Coleman]

Well, they didn't tell you.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah.

[Ken Coleman]

And that has to be really alarming.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah, that alarmed me.

[Ken Coleman]

I'll bet. No pun intended. Wow.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah, I was alarmed.

[Ken Coleman]

I think that should have been a reality show. I hate that we missed that.

[Jade Warshaw]

That part I don't miss. I love them. They were great people. I have nothing but love in my heart.

[Ken Coleman]

Still in touch with them.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah, somewhat. Someone from a distance, but not because they're not great people.

[Ken Coleman]

From a distance. Little Bette Midler from a distance. There it is. I knew she would do it, folks. That's all I gotta do is tee it up and she can sing it. Check the key lady in the lobby's giving you a heart sign. She wants a little Bette Midler during the break. That's how you go out to break right there, folks. I'll listen as she sings along during the commercial break. We'll be back before you know it. This is the Ramsey Show.

[Travis]

I still remember 10 years ago, 23 years old, I was frustrated, anxious and flat broke. I had followed all the ways that toxic money culture had led me down from well meaning parents and misguided guidance counselors and it left me with a pile of debt. But I'm telling you, it doesn't have to stay that way. Over a decade, I went from broke to millionaire and I break it all down in my new book, Breaking Free From Broke. I'm going to show you just how toxic this money system is and how you can break free from credit scores and credit cards and student loans and auto loans and investing traps and finally live a life that you're not exhausted by. A life with more margin, more options and more peace. If you want to check out the book, go to ramseysolutions.com store to get your copy of Breaking Free from broke. That's ramseysolutions.com store.

[Ken Coleman]

Welcome back to the Ramsey show alongside Jade Warshaw. I'm Ken Coleman. So glad you're with us today as we help you win with your money, win in your profession and win with your relationships. Triple 882-55-5225. Jade, I'm a little excited about it and I, I don't naturally celebrate these things like I should. Super excited. Been dreaming about a show concept for a long time and we've been working on it as a team. The team's done a great job. It's called Front Row Seat with Ken Coleman and it has people ask it, has it replaced the Ken Coleman Show? Yes, because it is a very different format. Imagine you're sitting in on a deep dive conversation with somebody who's a thought leader, someone who has done something extraordinary in their lives. They are a man or a woman of success and you get to be a part of the audience and you're sitting around with us asking a question. Well, that is the format, live format. We record it and then also we have a virtual format where people can zoom in, if you will. So we're bringing the audience to the front row seat. That's the concept. It's on YouTube now or wherever you get your podcast. New episode comes out every Tuesday morning. If you want to get better, personally move up professionally and lead effectively, those are the Conversations.

[Jade Warshaw]

Wow. How do you. How do you source your, like, guests? How do you pick. How do you select your guests? Because you've had some wonderful guests.

[Ken Coleman]

Yeah, we have some really fun gaps. And the way it goes down is, you know, we're selecting people within those categories. So, for instance, people that can help experts can help out in the area of personal growth. So that would be an expert maybe on sleep or nutrition or exercise.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay.

[Ken Coleman]

Right. And so holistic. We're mixing it up. Right. And then, of course, we have people that are professional gurus that can help you on certain soft skills. Like we just had Charles Duhigg. We just recorded that. It'll come out soon. Pulitzer Prize winning author of the book Super Communicators.

[Jade Warshaw]

Wow.

[Ken Coleman]

So we're talking about the three types of conversation. So how do we use those types of conversation to win in our profession but also win at home?

[Jade Warshaw]

That's so helpful.

[Ken Coleman]

And then, of course, leadership experts. So it's very intentional between those three buckets of content. That makes sense.

[Jade Warshaw]

So done.

[Ken Coleman]

Ken, thank you. I'm really excited about it. It's beautiful. By the way, if you want to check it out on YouTube, the team did a great job with the set. Looks really, really fun. So the Front Row Seat is the name of the show. Front Row Seat with Ken Coleman. You can get it on YouTube or wherever you get your podcasts. Let's go to Brianna, who's joining us in Dallas, Texas. Brianna, how can we help today?

[J]

Hi, Yes, I have a question. Well, I need some advice. Me and my husband are thinking about selling our home because we're just drowning in debt, and we just don't have any other option to try to get out of it but to sell our home. So, yes, that's what is.

[Ken Coleman]

What is what has created that scenario where you don't believe you have any other options. Give us some details.

[J]

Well, we are just drowning in debt. And I know y'all, we sales say sell the cars. And we looked into it. We owe in one of our cars. We owe like 9,000.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay.

[J]

And we. We try to see if we can sell it, but we will be under. It's really not worth selling. Is just, I guess right now we just better off paying it off. And the other one is 12,000, and that one as well is negative. So we're like, okay, we might as well just try to hang on to those and try to pay those off. And everything else is loans and credit cards, student loans, ira, go through the other ones.

[Jade Warshaw]

Go through the other amounts for us. So we can get a picture of this. So the $9,000 card, the 12,000 DOL. Car. What else?

[J]

And then loans, like personal loans, you know, like 20,000.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay.

[J]

Credit cards is around like 35 to 35 to like 40,000.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay.

[J]

Student loans is. My husband's is like 73,000.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay. How much are yours?

[J]

I don't have any.

[Jade Warshaw]

Good.

[J]

And my real. The IRS is like 9500.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay.

[J]

And then I have medical bills. That's like 3000.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay. Okay.

[Ken Coleman]

What's your combined income?

[J]

Combined income is like 10,500 to like 11,000.

[Ken Coleman]

Per month.

[J]

Yes.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay. And have you added up? If you don't know, it's okay. But if I were to ask you on the spot, like, how much does this cost you in payments every month? Do you know the number to that?

[J]

Like, the debt alone is like 4,000, probably a little bit more.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay, so you're paying 4,000 in payments. And then tell me what's your mortgage? Tell me about the mortgage. Tell me what you owe on it.

[J]

The mortgage is like 31, 30, 100.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay. And that's what you're paying per month. But tell me how much you bought the house for.

[J]

The house? We bought it for 386.

[Ken Coleman]

What do you.

[J]

What's it worth right now is worth like 385. 387.

[Ken Coleman]

Well, sweetheart, if you sell the house, that's not going to give you guys any much money at all.

[J]

I know we owe 340 on it right now.

[Ken Coleman]

Right. But after you pay your realtor, there's very little of this that is going to actually solve this problem.

[J]

Right. That's what we were like, okay, should we just try to fight for it or should we try to sell it and try to at least get out of it?

[Ken Coleman]

Jade's got something to tell you.

[J]

I mean, I was. We were thinking is because my husband drives like an hour and a half commute to his job.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay.

[J]

So he wanted to move closer to his job because it's. It's a long drive.

[Ken Coleman]

Did you rent for less money in that location? Sorry, Jay.

[Jade Warshaw]

That's okay.

[J]

The rent is probably going to be like 2,000.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah. Not much different. Well, no, you said you're paying 3, 100 per month.

[Ken Coleman]

Oh, yeah, that is. That is actually a huge difference. Difference.

[Jade Warshaw]

Right.

[J]

3100 plus H. The HOA.

[Jade Warshaw]

Oh, that's not including HOA. What's your HOA to?

[J]

250. Every quarter.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay. Every quarter. Okay.

[Ken Coleman]

I would consider moving Jade.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah.

[Ken Coleman]

In this situation because that's A long way to commute, number one.

[Jade Warshaw]

Well, there's a couple of things. You got that big commute I was going to ask you, is it an hour and a half each way or is that combined? Because if it's 40 minutes, that's not as big of a deal.

[J]

But no, it's each way.

[Jade Warshaw]

Oh, girl.

[Ken Coleman]

Yeah, I definitely move into the office.

[J]

Office three days out of the week. So two days he'll work from home, but three days out of the week he has to drive to the office.

[Jade Warshaw]

It's still a lot. Three hours driving in a day is a lot to get to work. So that's one, that's one green light. It's not the biggest reason because like you said, it's not like he's going in every day, but it is a reason. The biggest reason for me to consider getting out of this house is because it's, it's more than 25 of your take home pay. And at this point you need every dollar that you can get your hands on. Now, right, There is a thought here. And, and, and you guys need to sit and talk about this because there's a thought where I go, okay, if you guys really start side hustling, if you start picking up your income, there could be a world when this debt is over, that this is not 20, that this is 25% of your take home. You see what I'm saying? That you raise your income and it becomes something that you can keep around. Today though, it's really a problem. So I would say your homework. To sit down with your spouse tonight would be to say what are all the things we can do to make money? What are your opportunities that are directly related to your job and what are mine that are. Do you, do you both work?

[J]

Yes, we both work. So he has his main job and then he has a part time job on the weekends to make like some extra income. I try to work overtime. I work at a daycare, so I try to work extra like overtime whenever I can.

[Jade Warshaw]

How consistent can that happen? Is that like a daily thing or is it like a couple times a month?

[J]

It varies. It depends on the teachers. Like I just found out I have Covid, so I have to be out all week.

[Jade Warshaw]

Got you. So what I'd be looking for when I'm looking for a side hustle, I'm looking for something I can count on. That's the whole point. So I'd be looking. If I'm going to spend the extra hours working, I want something that's like clockwork. I can get it. I can go bust my butt and do it and it's there. So you both need that. And then if something, if, you know, part time pops up at the, at the job and you have the, the leverage, you know the place in your schedule to do it, you do that too. But right now I want, here's my, my main job and a go to side hustle that's always there. I can work it every day, every weekend. Got it. So that's you guys job to come up with that tonight and then after that. Have you made a budget?

[J]

I tried that dollar thing I just downloaded.

[Jade Warshaw]

Okay, good.

[J]

I did like the free trial thing, but I'm gonna have to cancel it because it's like 18amonth.

[Ken Coleman]

Okay, y'all need to stop borrowing money.

[Jade Warshaw]

Yeah, you gotta stop borrowing.

[Ken Coleman]

Yes. Like you got in this mess because y'all are trying to do too much and you, you don't have enough money for it. So if you can't afford every dollar to get a budget, you better get it out on paper.

[Jade Warshaw]

You can afford it. You spend more on pizza delivery. Okay, you can afford it.

[Ken Coleman]

This is the Ramsey. The right questions are the key to unlock personal and professional potential. It means if you're not where you want to be, you are not asking the right questions. I'm Ken Coleman and this is what my new show, Front Row Seat is all about. Over my career, I've had the distinct privilege to interview successful people from all walks of life and to coach over 10,000 professionals who wanted more. What sets successful people apart is a never ending desire to learn and grow. Each week I'll be joined by industry leaders and world class experts to have a conversation about how to get better, move up and lead well in work and life. But the best part of this show is you get to be a part of the conversation. Live in studio, we'll have a group of professionals just like you who have the power to ask questions and steer the discussion in real time. It's an opportunity to get real answers to real questions, like how to make the right decisions, have hard conversations, live a balanced life, and discover your next steps to growth. Join us every Tuesday for conversations that are guaranteed to surprise, challenge and inspire you. Check out Front row Seat wherever you get your podcasts.