The Read, Episode: “The Tale of The Bridesmaid and The Rodent”

Date: February 12, 2026
Hosts: Kid Fury & Crissle
Podcast Theme: Weekly, irreverent commentary on pop culture, Black culture, personal anecdotes, and on-air therapy for two New York City transplants.

Episode Overview

This week’s episode is a wild ride through Super Bowl reflections, the constant struggle with New York City rodents (literal and metaphorical), and a scathing examination of pettiness—familial and celebrity alike. Kid Fury and Crissle deliver their signature blend of humor, side-eye, and no-nonsense advice, tackling everything from Black excellence and Bad Bunny’s Super Bowl halftime show, to mice-in-luggage disasters, celebrity mess, and dog etiquette.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

NYC Winters, Summertime Anticipation, and Mouse Drama

• 00:00–07:29 | Winter Struggles & NYC Living
  • Crissle and Kid Fury bond over New York's brutal winter and the anticipation of summer, sharing anecdotes about coping with the weather. Crissle is getting a pedicure because “it’s 32 degrees — sandal season!” (04:28)
  • “My entire concept of what it means to be cold has changed.” — Crissle (04:34)
  • “Summer in New York is perfect though. It’s just like one of the most amazing, unmatched experiences.” — Kid Fury (06:06)
  • The episode segues into a hilarious aside about finding a wrapped Magnum condom in the snow, sparking speculation about its story. “Someone is out there getting the wor. Like, what do you mean?” — Kid Fury (07:03)

Black Excellence: Celebrating 20 Years of Kid Fury

• 07:29–09:21 | Self-Awarded Black Excellence
  • Kid Fury commemorates 20 years as Kid Fury, reflecting on his journey and growth, from a “little gay boy” afraid to speak up, to a powerhouse podcaster.
    • “Black excellence to the little gay boy that was too afraid to even speak up or have his voice heard.” — Kid Fury (08:18)
    • “She’s a big girl. She’s all grown up.” — Crissle (09:03)

Hot Tops: Super Bowl Super Bunny

• 09:24–15:14 | Super Bowl Halftime & Bad Bunny Review

  • The duo is blown away by Bad Bunny’s halftime show, praising its perfection, authenticity, choreography, and celebration of Latin and Caribbean cultures.

    • “That performance was perfect. It was a masterpiece.” — Kid Fury (09:39)
    • “I didn’t understand most of it... and still I was immersed.” — Kid Fury (10:15)
    • “It just felt like, this is not my culture, but I see my culture in this.” — Crissle (10:56)
    • Highlight appreciation for representation: “He shouted out most of the countries, not all, but everybody’s flag was there...and put the US and Canada last, which I was like, correct.” — Crissle (13:56)

  • They address backlash, especially from conservatives and anti-Black commentators, advising them to “just not watch it.” — Kid Fury (15:16)

    • “It’s a 15 minute annual anthology concert. Next year it’s gonna be somebody else.” — Kid Fury (15:14)

NYC Petty: Celebrity Fights to Brooklyn Rats

• 19:24–24:48 | Celebrity Mess

  • Rumor review: Ja Rule vs. Tony Yayo on a Delta flight — pillow throwing, first class chaos, and the petty legacy of New York rappers. “You’re going to get kicked off this flight over arguing with this nigga. Mind you, Tony Yayo’s 47. Ja Rule will be 50 at the end of the month. Too damn old.” — Crissle (21:54)

  • The “petty spectrum”: From legal beefs over unwritten rapper contracts, to 50 Cent weaponizing DoorDash commercials for trolling. (32:19)

Space & Ocean: Existential Tangents

• 24:58–28:48 | On Cosmic & Aquatic Dread
  • Kid Fury shares existential dread inspired by space movies, reflecting on cosmic insignificance and the terrors of the bottom of the ocean.
    • “There’s just something about knowing that you are this small.” — Kid Fury (26:20)
    • “I find it very reassuring. It’s like, why do I have anxiety? Are you kidding?” — Crissle (27:07)
    • “Godzilla could be down there. I’m fine with that.” — Crissle (28:50)

Pop Culture Relationships: Megan & Klay, Cardi B, and...BroRilla

• 33:51–39:02 | Good Vibes: Megan Thee Stallion & Klay Thompson

  • Megan Thee Stallion’s role in organizing Klay’s birthday bash; mutual admiration for how their relationship seems wholesome and drama-free. “I just love to see them together. They are so cute. She love her man, her man, her man.” — Crissle (35:51)

• 39:08–46:38 | Messy Vibes: Stephon Diggs Alleged Super Bowl Drama

  • Cardi B unfollowing Stephon Diggs ahead of the Super Bowl, speculation about his romantic rules, ex drama, and tour plans for “single summer Cardi.” Discussion about how women can reclaim their power post-breakup.
    • “It’s fuck these niggas season. That album’s calling my the drama Bit. Fuck these niggas.” — Kid Fury (43:42)

• 47:32–61:17 | Family Petty: Glorilla vs. BroRilla

  • Deep-dive into Glorilla’s family feud, with her sister “BroRilla” airing grievances about lack of financial support and subsequent (messy) viral internet exchanges.
    • “You niggas would drain her dry.” — Crissle (49:46)
    • “I'mma take care of my parents willfully, too. The rest of y’all...” — Kid Fury (50:09)
    • “If you have a job, you need to have some for everybody.” — Crissle (56:24)

Listener Letters: “The Tale of the Bridesmaid and the Rodent”

• 63:04–78:51 | Letter #1: The Mousegate Relationship

  • Aneesa discovers a mouse-infested suitcase after visiting her boyfriend, who gaslights her by blaming her car. Hosts go all the way in:
    • “You feel like you were gaslit and unsupported because both of those things were taking fucking place.” — Kid Fury (68:43)
    • “A mouse was in my car. And I only saw it after I saw that it destroyed my things — and both of these things took place because of you.” — Kid Fury (76:51)
    • “How do you mend the relationship, Aneesa? You fucking don’t.” — Kid Fury (71:50)
    • “Ain’t no couples counseling for this.” — Crissle (75:27)

• 78:52–88:12 | Letter #2: Can We Just Be Platonic?

  • Marco’s ex tries to introduce “rules” for friends-with-benefits — but only after sex. Hosts call out the manipulative behavior and urge Marco to move on.
    • “He admitted he hid the rules because he knew it would change my answer, and that made me feel played.” — Marco’s Letter
    • “To deliberately withhold information so that you can get something for your own benefit? That’s very manipulative.” — Crissle (87:10)

The Read: Rants & Raves

• 89:43–105:00 | Weekly Reads

  • Kid Rock & NFL: Dragged for saying Jay Z is a DEI hire. “Jay Z can’t be a DEI or nowhere. It literally makes absolutely no sense.” — Kid Fury (90:10)

  • Jake Paul’s Political Nonsense: Ridiculed for conflating ICE and 911. “That’s like somebody said, if you don’t like the police, don’t eat donuts.” — Kid Fury (93:56)

  • Trump White House Racism: Critique of White House posting a video depicting the Obamas as monkeys, and Trump’s non-apology: “Was it not a mistake to not watch the whole video? ...You did this deliberately.” — Crissle (97:55)

  • Chris Brown’s Super Bowl Delusion: Mocked for his “They need me” post after Bad Bunny’s halftime show. “It’s not like Kid Rock did a show and then he was like, ‘Oh y’all need me.’” — Crissle (101:04)

  • Corey Holcomb Violence: Called out for punching a woman and blaming TMZ. “TMZ didn’t punch that lady in the face, bitch. You did that.” — Crissle (103:33)

  • NYC Dog Etiquette: Furious rant on irresponsible dog owners—dogs in grocery stores, not picking up poop.

    • “Why am I over here picking out green onions and rudabagas...and here come your dog sniffing along the goddamn produce.” — Crissle (105:54)
    • “If you have a dog, and you do not want to clean up, don’t get a dog.” — Kid Fury (110:03)
    • “Leave the goddamn dog at home and pick up the shit on the sidewalk.” — Crissle (109:02)

Standout Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “I'm that OG baby. That original doll. So you can lick my titties and suck my breasts.” — Kid Fury, celebrating himself (08:27)
• “Domino’s... that's culture.” — Both (16:15)
• “No, but, like, I honestly was thinking about a way to discuss this, and all I could think of was hold their nuts. Like, just hold everyone’s balls.” — Kid Fury on responding to MAGA Super Bowl outrage (18:13)
• “If you have a job, you need to have some for everybody.” — Crissle on family expectations (56:24)
• “How do you mend the relationship, Aneesa? You f***ing don't.” — Kid Fury (71:50)
• “I'm not a community garden.” — Marco’s Letter (before 80:58)
• “Jay Z can’t be a DEI or nowhere. It literally makes absolutely no sense.” — Kid Fury (90:10)
• “Why am I over here picking out green onions and rudabagas...and here come your dog sniffing along the goddamn produce.” — Crissle (105:54)
• “Pick up after your goddamn dog and leave it out of places where it is not allowed to be.” — Crissle (109:22)

Timestamps for Significant Segments

• 04:28 | Crissle on NYC Winter & shifting cold tolerance (“It is 32 degrees today, so I'm going to get a pedicure. Sandal season.”)
• 07:29 | Kid Fury awards himself Black Excellence for 20 years of Kid Fury
• 09:24 | Hot Tops: Super Bowl talk and Bad Bunny review
• 19:24 | Ja Rule vs. Tony Yayo airplane pettiness
• 32:19 | 50 Cent’s DoorDash trolling commercial breakdown
• 47:32 | Glorilla versus BroRilla family feud
• 63:04 | Letters: “The Tale of The Bridesmaid and The Rodent”—mouse-in-suitcase disaster
• 78:52 | Letters: Marco’s friends-with-benefits “rules” gone wrong
• 89:43 | The Read: Rants on Kid Rock, Jake Paul, Trump, Chris Brown, Corey Holcomb, and NYC dog etiquette

Final Thoughts: Episode Vibe & Utility

This episode is a testament to Kid Fury and Crissle’s unmatched ability to extract both humor and realness out of everyday disasters, pop culture mess, and timeless urban struggles (rats, toxic men, dog poop). Their language is cutting, always funny, and deeply reassuring for anyone navigating adulthood, city life, and digital chaos. Longtime listeners will relish the blend of therapy, shade, and practical truths they deliver.