Dying To Speak

Summary

Podcast Summary: The Read – Episode: Dying To Speak

Release Date: May 8, 2025
Host/Authors: Kid Fury and Crissle (Crystal)
Published On: iTunes, iHeart Radio Talk, SoundCloud, Stitcher
Network: LoudSpeakers Network

---

1. Black Excellence

Tina Knowles' New Bestselling Book
Timestamp: 01:26 – 02:27

Kid Fury and Crissle kick off the episode by celebrating Tina Knowles' achievement of becoming a New York Times bestselling author. They commend her book for being engaging and full of "tea" that satisfies the nosy and curious listeners.

Notable Quote:
Crissle: “I cannot recommend this book enough to others. So, yeah, congratulations Ms. Tina. Very, very, very well deserved.”
(02:13)

Kendrick Lamar’s Record-Breaking Concert
Timestamp: 02:27 – 04:04

The hosts discuss Kendrick Lamar making history as the first rapper to earn $9 million from a single concert. They highlight his sold-out show at Minnesota's Bank Stadium, surpassing Eminem's previous record.

Notable Quotes:
Kid Fury: “Kendrick Lamar has become the first rapper to earn $9 million from one concert alone.”
(02:27)
Crissle: “You sold every available ticket and $9 million were grossed in one evening. My goodness.”
(03:43)

---

2. Hot Box

Met Gala Recap
Timestamp: 04:08 – 22:32

Kid Fury and Crissle delve into the highlights of the Met Gala, focusing on the "Black Dandyism" theme. They praise several celebrities for their fashion choices, including Rihanna, Cardi B, Quinta Brunson, Janelle Monáe, and Zendaya. The hosts express admiration for the creativity and execution of the theme while critiquing some attendees for not adhering to it as effectively.

Notable Quotes:
Crissle: “I love Janelle Monae... They did a whole ass sickening spread with many of these faces.”
(07:10)
Kid Fury: “A lot of men looked great, but I saw a lot of unfortunate ones, especially black ones.”
(22:32)

Nick Cannon’s Unusual Insurance Policy
Timestamp: 36:26 – 41:40

The discussion shifts to Nick Cannon insuring his testicles for $10 million each, a move they find both humorous and concerning. They speculate on the implications and joke about the motivations behind such a decision.

Notable Quote:
Crissle: “Father of 12 Nick Cannon took out a $10 million dollar insurance policy on his testicles.”
(39:13)
Kid Fury: “If he loses a ball, that money goes to his kids. Why wouldn't they try to chop your balls off?”
(42:23)

Parenting Challenges and Neurodivergence
Timestamp: 56:05 – 124:38

The hosts engage in a deep conversation about parenting, particularly focusing on raising neurodivergent children. They discuss personal experiences, societal expectations, and the struggles of balancing personal well-being with parenting responsibilities. Crissle shares her frustrations with strict parenting and societal pressures, while Kid Fury empathizes with the challenges faced by neurodivergent individuals.

Notable Quotes:
Crissle: “You need to get comfortable with cutting me off if you want to share so badly.”
(75:00)
Kid Fury: “If you aren't comfortable, then you likely are not going to get what you need out of the session.”
(64:34)

---

3. Letters

Letter from Angelica: Therapist’s Unprofessionalism
Timestamp: 62:18 – 66:20

Angelica writes about her uncomfortable experience with a therapist who used profanity without seeking consent. The hosts discuss appropriate professional behavior in therapy settings and emphasize the importance of finding a therapist who respects the client's boundaries.

Notable Quotes:
Kid Fury: “They said, hear ye, hear ye. Blacks to the front. Oh yeah...”
(23:31)
Crissle: “Not a therapist. Well, close enough. I have to. I have to say, fuck.”
(66:20)

Letter from Hillary Banks: Black Identity and Sound
Timestamp: 72:16 – 81:55

Hillary Banks questions how black individuals who "sound white" are perceived within the community. Crissle and Kid Fury debate the impact of upbringing and environment on one's identity and communication style, stressing the importance of beliefs and actions over vocal inflections.

Notable Quotes:
Crissle: “Stop speculating about these seven almost eight-year-old kids.”
(123:57)
Kid Fury: “It's a whole lot of niggas that I know... don't give a fuck how you sound.”
(75:29)

Letter from Sharon: One-Sided Friendship
Timestamp: 82:05 – 130:36

Sharon expresses frustration over a friend, Laura, who dominates conversations, making the friendship feel one-sided. The hosts offer advice on setting boundaries and prioritizing reciprocal relationships, highlighting the challenges of maintaining friendships with differing communication styles.

Notable Quotes:
Crissle: “If you don't like the way you talk to me, then speak the fuck up type of attitude.”
(94:11)
Kid Fury: “Laura wasn't talking over everybody in the goddamn house because she was neurodivergent.”
(97:07)

---

4. Final Thoughts and Wrap-Up

In the concluding segments, Kid Fury and Crissle reminisce about personal experiences, upcoming events, and share final remarks on the topics discussed. They emphasize themes of individuality, community support, and self-care.

Notable Quotes:
Crissle: “Please shut the fuck up when it comes to these, these seven almost eight-year-old kids.”
(123:57)
Kid Fury: “Happy May. Have fun at the concert if you can. Please be safe.”
(131:05)

---

Key Takeaways:

• Celebration of Black Achievements: The hosts highlight significant accomplishments within the black community, emphasizing the importance of representation and excellence.

• Fashion and Pop Culture Critique: Detailed analysis of the Met Gala's themes and celebrity fashion choices, blending admiration with constructive criticism.

• Parenting and Mental Health: Deep dives into the complexities of raising neurodivergent children, the importance of supportive parenting, and navigating societal pressures.

• Navigating Friendships: Practical advice on handling one-sided relationships and the necessity of mutual respect and communication in friendships.

• Personal Reflections: The hosts share personal stories and experiences, fostering a relatable and authentic connection with their audience.

---

This episode of The Read offers a blend of humor, critical analysis, and heartfelt discussions, making it a must-listen for fans interested in hip-hop, pop culture, and the intricacies of modern black life in New York City.

Transcript

[Crystal]

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[Kid Fury]

Happy day. Happy day. Welcome back to the podcast Niggas and friends. It's May and I'm anxiety.

[Crystal]

And I am Angel Reese and this is the read. Thanks for coming back.

[Kid Fury]

It is indeed welcome. Let us begin our this May 1 May episode by with some black excellence. And I think you know where it's going. Tis the season. Congratulations on being a number one New York Times best selling Athul Ms. Tina Knowles. Yes, indeed. I mean, who's surprised?

[Crystal]

Absolutely no one. It's an excellent book. There's a lot in it, but it's easy to read and it's a lot of tea in there for all of you who just want to be messy and nosy and.

[Kid Fury]

Oh yeah, I guess so.

[Crystal]

Yeah, and a lot of. I mean, there's just a lot of everything. It's really. I cannot recommend this book enough to others. So. Yeah, congratulations, Ms. Tina. Very, very, very well deserved.

[Kid Fury]

Kendrick Lamar has become the first rapper to earn $9 million from one concert alone. His opening night for the grand national tour took place in Minneapolis and grossed $9.1 million. Jesus. 47,000 tickets. Which also marks that shows Bank Stadium's most attended concert of all time.

[Crystal]

Wow.

[Kid Fury]

The record was previously held by Eminem for a show that he had in Melbourne. But all we ever wanted was a black rampage. And so here we are.

[Crystal]

Exactly. Fuck being rational. Give them what they asked for. I'm glad. I'm glad a black rapper has that record.

[Kid Fury]

Me ass.

[Crystal]

Well, very glad. Yes. Who. And who better than Kendrick? That is. That's crazy because that's an average ticket price of just under $200 which is not crazy. That's a crazy price.

[Kid Fury]

It's not.

[Crystal]

It's really not. And this Nigga grossed over nine. So you sold every single ticket.

[Kid Fury]

One. All of them.

[Crystal]

You sold every available ticket and $9 million were grossed in one evening. My goodness. Well, what can you say? Like, work Kendrick. The headline is a little misleading because I'm sure he's not. You know, that's not 9 million going in his pocket, but still huge.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah.

[Crystal]

What a. What a success. What an achievement.

[Kid Fury]

Okay, let's do some everyday talk with a section called the hot box. First of all, let's just discuss the Met gala, because I actually didn't see most of it.

[Crystal]

Well, I didn't watch the carpet, but I knew everybody would be online. All the.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah, online. So same. But I haven't really even looked at the online looks, to be honest. With the only ones I've seen. I saw what Nikki wore. I saw what do had on. I saw Cardi. I saw Quinta. I liked all of these looks. I saw. I saw Madonna trying to figure it out. She got there. She got there. By that, I mean I saw, like, a long clip of them trying to, like, I guess, get her outfit in place.

[Crystal]

Oh, okay. You meant literally trying to get there. Okay.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah, like, literally trying to.

[Crystal]

Okay. I thought you meant the outfit. Each other.

[Kid Fury]

But, you know, I don't know what the theme is, why so many people were wearing suits or, like, things like.

[Crystal]

Tailored to the black dandy ism about.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, that was the.

[Crystal]

Right, Right. That was the Mets theme this year.

[Kid Fury]

So, duh.

[Crystal]

Okay, so, yeah, that. You saw a lot of tailored suits and stuff like that for that exact reason.

[Kid Fury]

Okay, perfect.

[Crystal]

Yeah, she did.

[Kid Fury]

So, yeah, I loved that. I see now today that Rihanna was there with a plus one.

[Crystal]

She been trying to hide that belly for some weeks now, and I guess she just said, fuck it. Now that I'm going back where everybody is looking for me anyway, y' all might as well see it for sure that. Yes, baby number three is on the way. I want to say get off of her.

[Kid Fury]

But this is the one that Coleman. Coleman Domingo did this.

[Crystal]

I think it was him and Pharrell.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah. Okay. Yes. Okay, I'm back. But yeah, she looks great. Belly. Here goes another one. Oh, I love the shoes. I don't think I remember seeing anybody else. Here's Coleman.

[Crystal]

Did you have a favorite?

[Kid Fury]

Well, no, like I said, I barely. I loved Cardi's look. I thought Cardi looks beautiful. I thought Quinta looked really good. I Love the short 90s kind of world styles that Quinta wears anytime. Quinta has like a short, a little pixie. What is RuPaul be calling a little pussycat wig?

[Crystal]

I think that is what he calls him. I love Janelle Monae.

[Kid Fury]

I didn't see Janelle's. Let me look. Oh, I'm telling you, I didn't see. I didn't see shit.

[Crystal]

The look was already incredible. And then they.

[Kid Fury]

I can't even imagine.

[Crystal]

Just Google it real quick. That's like her, but that is right.

[Kid Fury]

She is black.

[Crystal]

Adieu. Exactly. When you see this nigga, shut your.

[Kid Fury]

Mouth and open your eyes. What is this lady's life?

[Crystal]

So you see the jacket, right, that she saw? The jacket is printed to look like the suitcase. And then you take it off and it actually. Is that with the bag too, bitch?

[Kid Fury]

No, I see that, I see the piece. I mean, this lady got the theme.

[Crystal]

Looked incredible and was like Janelle, Janelle. Tessa Thompson, I really thought looked incredible.

[Kid Fury]

This is so. Wait, I'm still stuck on Janelle.

[Crystal]

Oh, no.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah.

[Crystal]

Incredible. She looked so good. Oh, our WNBA players who were there. My Liberty players.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, lovely.

[Crystal]

Stewie. So they took our three. Like our big three. Jj, Stewie, and Sab. And JJ and Stewie are gay and masc, so no shade to Sab. But their. But their outfits, I thought just looked so much better in accordance with the theme. But yeah, it was a gorgeous theme. Like, the idea was great and I didn't see too many people that I just. And the people whose the looks I saw that I did outright hate, it was white people whose names I don't know, so.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, yeah. Why were they even there?

[Crystal]

Couldn't tell you much about that. But Mindy Kaling looked great. Hamilton, Hunter Schaefer, Reggie John Page.

[Kid Fury]

Why does ASAP Rocky have a musket?

[Crystal]

Oh, let me not. I didn't like Sha' Carri's look. I didn't like Sha' Carri'S dress. It was Valentino.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, is that an umbrella?

[Crystal]

I'm sure it fit the theme, but not a. Not a big fan. But yeah, everybody. Most people looked great. Demi Moore looked good.

[Kid Fury]

Like, who the fuck is that? Who's. Matter of fact, you know what you say a white woman. I don't know who that is.

[Crystal]

Listen, I'm telling you, the looks where I was like, what the fuck is this?

[Kid Fury]

What is that?

[Crystal]

Everybody else.

[Kid Fury]

Emma, Emma, Emma. Emma Chamberlain. Who's Emma Chamberlain?

[Crystal]

Never heard of that.

[Kid Fury]

I hope not to again.

[Crystal]

Don't know that.

[Kid Fury]

Matter of fact, Vogue lets you look a Vogue Lets you vote. Do you like this look?

[Crystal]

Oh, well, does the loser not get invited back next year?

[Kid Fury]

La La. Okay. Work, Teanna bitch. Teyana came here looking like smoke and Stack, bitch. I'm turned. Turned. Oh, the girls came out and they came to have a good.

[Crystal]

This is what I'm telling you, everybody.

[Kid Fury]

Zendaya.

[Crystal]

Incredible. Now Zendaya was wearing almost the exact same thing as somebody else. I was like, now how did that happen?

[Kid Fury]

Well, I saw Zendaya first and I bet you they won't beat her. This shit is so why down our.

[Crystal]

I had to Google she's on Shogun.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, I know who that is.

[Crystal]

Yeah, pretty girl. But yep, she and Zendaya looked pretty much almost identical.

[Kid Fury]

Raul Domingo. I was about to say, I like this. The husband's white man suit. Of course I do. Of course. You better come to this. She's looking for us. I saw that last name and I was like, oh yeah, that's why I kind of know who this is.

[Crystal]

Yeah, it was good.

[Kid Fury]

Okay. Anna Wintour. Let somebody put some clothes on her. Okay, now they're really just showing me the white people. La Ro dressed. Who's that behind him this long? I don't know. Here we have Tyla. I like the dress. Tyler.

[Crystal]

She. I mean, she's always beautiful.

[Kid Fury]

Dapper Dan. Oh God, the white people didn't even give a damn. Kim Kardashian. Like Batman and Catwoman.

[Crystal]

I deliberately did not name her. I rarely enjoy what she's wearing though.

[Kid Fury]

I like Chapel Ron's outfit.

[Crystal]

Oh yeah, she was cute.

[Kid Fury]

It's very hard.

[Crystal]

Yeah, I did see a white girl who went. Her TikTok was like, get ready with me to be the least famous person at the Met. And she gets to go because her dad is the city controller in New York. And I guess the city controller gets a ticket to the Met gala. But she was talking about how, you know, like they did all this research into black dandyism, they worked with a black designer and they were including all of these specific elements and nods to.

[Kid Fury]

They meaning just she and her family.

[Crystal]

Her and her dad. Well, but, but so this is what I'm saying. If the city controllers 20 year old daughter was like, let me put some real thought right and work with this designer and all these. And then her dad was like, well, technically I'm wearing the tux I got married in, but he did make the tie. But yeah, if that girl and her dad can be intentional about who they work with and all that, then I, I don't see any reason Right. Like, everybody, even the giant fashion houses should have had somebody black on hand to be working with. Everybody who was going, like, I know everybody can't work with a black designer, but those. Those fashion houses can work with black designers.

[Kid Fury]

Like, even City Controller dad being like, well, this suit is the one I got married in is sentimental and cute.

[Crystal]

Yeah. I mean that. And, you know, how much more money is it going to cost?

[Kid Fury]

No, for real.

[Crystal]

But, like, being my daughter, have a outfit, and then, you know, you could just make me a tie and a pocket square to match.

[Kid Fury]

Relatable and cute. Yeah.

[Crystal]

And. And I. I. First of all, I do feel a level of shame whenever white people know something about black people that I don't know. So I was like, not this white woman teaching me about black. Like, obviously, I can't know every single thing about black people that every black person that ever was.

[Kid Fury]

But more than most, how about we take a stop at that rest place?

[Crystal]

Yeah. This. It really was. Again. When they announced the theme last year, I said, this sounds extremely promising. And you niggas really did come through. Y' all looked great Wednesday.

[Kid Fury]

I hate this dress.

[Crystal]

Jenna Ortega.

[Kid Fury]

Sabrina Carpenter, 8.

[Crystal]

Isn't she?

[Kid Fury]

Let me tell you something, Espresso. That bitch work. Yeah, she worked it out.

[Crystal]

Issa looks good. Really? Like, it was a lovely look to be a lovely.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah, great, great theme, great outfits.

[Crystal]

Beautiful gowns. Yeah, gorgeous.

[Kid Fury]

I saw a clip of. Yeah, Cardi's might still be my favorite.

[Crystal]

Yeah, she's really up there for me. She is really, really up there for me.

[Kid Fury]

The color, the texture, the shape, the hair, the makeup.

[Crystal]

It' something about a woman in a well tailored suit.

[Kid Fury]

It's just something about a woman in a well tailored suit. That's why I like Z.

[Crystal]

Yes. Yes. Oh, how could I forget my quarterback, who is not actually my quarterback. Jalen Hurst and his wife looked beautiful. Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Kid Fury]

Lauryn Hill showed up.

[Crystal]

They were there on time, and not even the. She wasn't even the last one there. Bad Bunny looked good. Wow. Speaking of Bad Bunny, that nigga is going on a world tour and not coming to the United States of.

[Kid Fury]

I know that's right. You know what, Bad Bunny? I already liked you, my nigga. But E work, because first of all, he's Bad fucking Bunny. As if he needs to.

[Crystal]

Right?

[Kid Fury]

Like we're talking about global sensation.

[Crystal]

Oh, I'm not coming to the United States. Oh. Oh, no.

[Kid Fury]

Good. That's what you get, bitch.

[Crystal]

That nigga's going to doctor. Costa Rica, Mexico, Colombia, Peru, Chile, Argentina, Brazil, Australia. And Japan.

[Kid Fury]

And the American girlies will be booking their tickets. You also out there trying to learn how to speak Swedish and shit to go see Renaissance. You think the girlies ain't flying to go see Bad Bun? France.

[Crystal]

Italy. I'm looking at these tour dates like, nigga, you are going everywhere.

[Kid Fury]

Destination trips. Bad Bunny don't give a fuck. And I live.

[Crystal]

Yeah, go, go.

[Kid Fury]

There was. Oh, here's that other person you said tried to dress like or had the same thing on.

[Crystal]

It's very similar. Not exactly the same, but.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah. The lady from my mama favorite show.

[Crystal]

I'm shocked that that somehow happened with Law. Well, you know, that probably wasn't Zendaya's only outfit either.

[Kid Fury]

But of course not.

[Crystal]

Cindy. See, look, this. I keep saying it looked good. Everybody, like most people.

[Kid Fury]

What do you think? What do you think of Kiki Palm? Was Vera Wang?

[Crystal]

Um, well.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah. So. Mm.

[Crystal]

It's funny. Cause you said it, and I immediately thought of Vera Wang's look.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah.

[Crystal]

I think was much better than this one.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah.

[Crystal]

Mm. You know, I'm not a fashion girl, so.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah, me neither.

[Crystal]

I just look at things and I say, I like that or I don't like that.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah.

[Crystal]

This may be completely on theme and maybe, you know, just perfectly executed. I do not care for this white dress overlay with black pants underneath.

[Kid Fury]

No.

[Crystal]

And putting on black shoes and a black hairpiece does not tie it all together for me. No, I just.

[Kid Fury]

No.

[Crystal]

I would have rather seen almost anything else.

[Kid Fury]

Are we serving drinks at the wedding? Are we performing cabaret at the wedding? We're doing all of them.

[Crystal]

Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

You're a bride, waitress, showgirl. Okay.

[Crystal]

I'm looking at it now. It said she wanted to inhabit the tailoring, but also the history of black culture fashion as a tool to enter spaces where we're not allowed. So I'm going to take the inspiration of Dorothy Dandridge weddings. O. Okay. Yeah. It's giving. I'm the bride and the groom, but.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, my God.

[Crystal]

But sure, you know. All right.

[Kid Fury]

Halle Berry.

[Crystal]

She is really beautiful.

[Kid Fury]

She's very beautiful. And she's like, I'm. You know, we don't even have to talk about.

[Crystal]

Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

Heidi, this is what you wore to the Met Gala. Heidi. Heidi Klune. Heidi. Heidi.

[Crystal]

You really are looking at all these for the first time.

[Kid Fury]

Heidi. Gala. Heidi. Heidi Klum. You wore this to the Met Gala. You dressed like a Tolkien character for Halloween. Every Halloween.

[Crystal]

Oh, that's true.

[Kid Fury]

You put on 500 pounds of makeup and prosthetics for the Black Dandy as A Met gala. You wore a fucking.

[Crystal]

A regular ass. Black.

[Kid Fury]

A regular ass. Housewives of Salt Lake City Ass. Cocktail hour Ass. Okay, okay. Well, I know what year it is and how white people feel and whether they saying it or not, you know, I'd be forgetting. I'd be friend. I smoke weed. I don't care about most things, so sometimes, you know, should be catching me off guard, but. Wow.

[Crystal]

Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

Heidi Klum, one of the most.

[Crystal]

Just closet.

[Kid Fury]

Like an actual fashion icon. Host of a show called Project Runway where bitches have put clothes together and some have gone on to then dress bitches at the Met Gala. You've come to your, what, 50th one, and the black dandy is in here. And you were just like, oh, yeah, just wrap some fabric around it.

[Crystal]

She said, oh, black. And I look dandy.

[Kid Fury]

It's black.

[Crystal]

It's perfect, right?

[Kid Fury]

The black dress. I'm dandy.

[Crystal]

Let's wrap it up. Georgio, throw me in the car. Let's go.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, I think I'm pissed. I think I'm pissed.

[Crystal]

Yeah, because she really could have gone all out.

[Kid Fury]

She sits in 12 hours of effects for Halloween.

[Crystal]

You're a model.

[Kid Fury]

You couldn't put on a suit.

[Crystal]

You're a fucking supermodel. Like.

[Kid Fury]

Like what? She would have been my read. I don't even have one. That would have been perfect. All I had to do space ancient.

[Crystal]

I mean, Pharrell, even. It's like you're the co chair, and that's what you want.

[Kid Fury]

No shade, no shake. I was gonna skip it because I saw what he had on.

[Crystal]

Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

I remember thinking Coleman looked like every character right from Gladiator.

[Crystal]

Right. I thought he was gonna give us more of what Coleman gave. And he was like, tailoring super, super fine. Black tailoring, you guys.

[Kid Fury]

Coleman made sure his bitch was out here. Black and dandy.

[Crystal]

Can we get a look, though? Like, let's get a. Like you're Pharrell. Yeah. It really didn't make sense for him to be so understated.

[Kid Fury]

But sure, I skipped you too. I skipped you too. Yeah, but I saw.

[Crystal]

Like, fun times.

[Kid Fury]

My God, if ever there's a theme too, for men, where it's like, oh, we can really show out.

[Crystal]

Really.

[Kid Fury]

We always can. But this is the year where you can, like, get it. Like, a lot of times I feel like they be giving themes to these motherfuckers, and niggas just be like, I don't know what that means. I don't know what to do with that. Just put a suit on me. Oh, no. Cumberburn. Let's just. Let's just leave the house. This is one where you really could have fucked some shit up. Not only that, but Coleman Evogue did a whole ass sickening spread with many of these faces that are like, here's what it looks like. But once again, the femmes and even some of the WNBA dolls came in and fucked your cena.

[Crystal]

I was so proud of my girls. Oh no. And they looked good as fuck too. As the fuck not every woman in a suit out dressing you n like.

[Kid Fury]

What?

[Crystal]

What? Yikes.

[Kid Fury]

What? Yeah, so they look better than you when they come in gowns and shit.

[Crystal]

Black dandyism. You men should have knocked this out the park. Men should have.

[Kid Fury]

No, Shay, I saw a lot of good, A lot of men who looked great. But I saw a lot of unfortunate ones, especially black ones, where it's like, nigga, I know you have Coleman Jalen one of these niggas phone number. Teanna was at the shoot. Yeah, Law Roach. Probably super, super busy. But you could have probably asked his assistant for a quote.

[Crystal]

It's really Pharrell for me because you're the co chair of this event.

[Kid Fury]

The co. And isn't he still one of the creative directors at Louis Vuitton or something?

[Crystal]

Probably, probably. And Louis Vuitton people who looked great. So I'm even more confuzzled. I really do not get it.

[Kid Fury]

You say what's who? Who are you?

[Crystal]

You said it's not about me. It's not about me. Let me you know this is my event. Let me be very demure.

[Kid Fury]

Coleman said it's about me.

[Crystal]

It's not about you because it is about me.

[Kid Fury]

Then they said, hear ye, hear ye. Blacks to the front. The. Oh yeah, we've said that Rihanna is pregnant. She revealed it at the gala. RZA is three. Riot is 21 months. So she is preparing to have three under three. Likely. Cause Riza actually doesn't turn three until later. Like in a couple more weeks.

[Crystal]

I mean, three under three and three under four is the same hell to me.

[Kid Fury]

Well, you know what?

[Crystal]

Kids don't start, you know, being cool till they're like eight or nine.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah, I was gonna say five.

[Crystal]

Up until like you gotta wait for them to not need you for every fucking thing. Where you can just like let them play in their room and you can be reasonably assured that they're not gonna kill themselves accidentally. Like you gotta wait a while, so.

[Kid Fury]

But when they can reach the juice, you know that they wanna electrocute themselves.

[Crystal]

You're like you know what?

[Kid Fury]

Then they're, like, not as irksome all the time.

[Crystal]

When you can. When they wanna wake up early and you can say, go fix you some cereal and watch TV until I get out this bed. And don't. Don't come in this room again.

[Kid Fury]

Hold tight fast. Cause that lasts what, two years?

[Crystal]

Three. I mean, two they have.

[Kid Fury]

You gotta keep your eyes on them.

[Crystal]

Again, I can't imagine.

[Kid Fury]

Then they start selling drugs.

[Crystal]

How you have. All right, two toddlers and you're pregnant. It's already too much.

[Kid Fury]

It's actually selling that dope at nine years old. I watched you got served.

[Crystal]

Oh, is that where that happened?

[Kid Fury]

No, I don't. Oh, but God bless. You know, you're plenty wealthy, so I'm sure you'll have all the help.

[Crystal]

I mean. Yeah, already got it. Just damn.

[Kid Fury]

Like, probably just buy new ears so you don't even hear the crying.

[Crystal]

It's. I don't know.

[Kid Fury]

You just have noise canceling.

[Crystal]

It just seems crazy to me that somebody would want three kids.

[Kid Fury]

But, sweetie. Okay, I was at brunch on Sunday. I left the house for the first time in, like, all year.

[Crystal]

Oh, amen.

[Kid Fury]

And there were a number of adorable babies. Why you bring them to brunch? But there were a number of adorable babies. And there's one baby. Had to be one, couldn't have been two yet. In his little high chair that they give you at the neighboring table. Must have been a birthday. Big crowd. Looked like it might have been an Armenian or something. And this. The servant comes down. They ask her to take a picture or whatever. And she, like, hasn't even held the photo up. I mean, the phone yet. But she's, like, getting ready to hold the phone up and. And the baby already knows to, like, look and smile, and he does this big. Oh, I love that one tooth having baby grin. And my heart did a backflip.

[Crystal]

Oh, I love that.

[Kid Fury]

And I was just like, should I have a daycare? Maybe I should have a daycare.

[Crystal]

Oh, wow.

[Kid Fury]

Because the thing. I love kids and I think that I would be, you know, they would. They would be taken care of. They'd be eating proper things. Oh, I don't know. Chicken tendies, maybe. They'd be eating well. And chicken tendies.

[Crystal]

Not even bad. Not even bad.

[Kid Fury]

I'll do the research. And then for entertainment. No sexy red. No, we don't. We're not doing any. We have Earth, we have wind, we have fire, we have Beyonce. We've got. We've got Isaac Hayes, we've got Gregory Isaacs. We've got the classics you can do. Like, that's what we have here. No bluey, Steven Universe naps and so. But the great thing about this is that when it's all said and done, you leave. When it's all said and done, you go home. We have you for a good eight to 10 hours. 6pm the latest, you have to get out. And I think that's the winning strategy, is that when I wake up in the morning, you are not there.

[Crystal]

Yeah. Temporarily in charge. Yeah. And then they go back. It really is the best. Is the best of both worlds.

[Kid Fury]

No, but they're cute. For those of you who have them three at the same time, all screaming and wanting Mac and cheese.

[Crystal]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

And your titties hurt and your stomach hurt and your coochie hurt.

[Crystal]

Maybe if I could afford a full staff to help. Rihanna don't have to. You know, she gets. She don't have to do none of the hard shit. She gets to just do the fun shit, I guess. So. Congratulations. It's like, congratulations. I wonder if. If they're hoping for a girl or if they're just like, whatever God gives us. Whatever God gives.

[Kid Fury]

They're likely hoping for a girl. Like, I just think that's how that ends up working. But girl, as quick as you're. You're churning them out, I really think the mentality should just be whatever God gives you.

[Crystal]

You really can have a baby every calendar year if you want to keep going. I mean, I think your uterus would eventually drop right on out of your vagina, but you can do it.

[Kid Fury]

Probably.

[Crystal]

Hey, y' all, we all know that spring comes with more than just flowers, okay? For a lot of us can also come with sneezing, itchy eyes, non stop congestion, maybe a runny nose. But why suffer when relief is just a click away? ZocDoc has you covered now for a lot of us, you may be like, yeah, I've had allergies all my life. I already know what to do. Some of us are facing this for the very first time. Like when I moved to New York, never had allergies before. All of a sudden, I do. What do I do? Head over to Zocdoc.com, find me a doctor and book an appointment so that I can find out what's going on and get the medicine treatment recommendations from a medical doctor like I need. There's nothing easier than finding an appointment through zocdoc. I love zocdoc because you can find doctors online that you see what insurance they take, you see where they're located, if they're affiliated with a hospital or some other system and you see their availability. So not only do you find the doctor, you can go ahead and select the appointment book, confirm. You can even find in person or telehealth right there on Zocdoc. It could not be easier. So stop putting off those doctor's appointments today and go to Zocdoc.com/the read to find an instantly book a top rated doctor. That's z o cdoc.com/the read zocdoc.com/the read take care of yourselves. All right, let's get back to the show. Hey y' all. This episode of the Read is brought to you by Squarespace. We love Squarespace over here at the Read. They are the number one all in one perfect platform to get your website off and running. Okay. They give you everything you need to offer services and get paid all in one place. From consultations to events and experiences. Showcase your offerings with a customizable website designed to attract clients and grow your business. With Blueprint AI, Squarespace's AI Enhanced website builder, you can quickly create a personalized site that aligns with your brand and goals. Plus, Squarespace also streamlines your workflow with built in tools for appointment scheduling, email marketing, invoicing and seamless online payments to keep your business running smoothly and ensure you're paid on time. I do love Squarespace. We have been using Squarespace over here at the Read and for our own personal websites and different ventures for years and years now, maybe almost 10 years, because it is so easy to do. It's easy to sign up, easy to get a design together, and easy to start making money and showing off what you offer through Squarespace and their incredible website design capabilities. So if you're ready to launch your site, head to squarespace.com the read to start your free trial. And when you're ready to launch, use offer code the read to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Again, that's squarespace.com the re a D let them know. Kiff here and Crystal sent you.

[Kid Fury]

The Atlanta Falcons and Jeff Ulbrich have been fined $350,000 by the National Football League.

[Crystal]

Correct.

[Kid Fury]

Over the leak of the phone Number of 1 Shador Sanders, son of Jeff Jacks, apologized for a prank call made to Shador as he waited to pick up. Wait. Waited to be picked up? I'm sorry. In the draft. Just as a reminder, because I don't think we Discussed it. You were going to mention it in your read and decided to have more fun. As a reminder, Jack, this is what happened. Call Shador pretending to be the general manager of the New Orleans Saints. Ha ha. Until now. We're gonna need 350,000 of them things. Since you think you're funny. Thoughts. I would miss when people said them things instead of dollars.

[Crystal]

Well, it's not. I think 250 of it is the Falcons and 100k is Jeff. Oh, yeah, but this is. This is fully deserved.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah.

[Crystal]

I really appreciated Jeff's press conference where he was like, yeah, my failure to keep that iPad secure has my son being an entitled. There is no excuse for that. And you know, thank you to the Sanders family, who has been way more gracious about this than they even should be. Like, we've been on the phone and y' all have been nicer than y' all should be, all things considered. So thank you so much. And we're with wishing Shador.

[Kid Fury]

It is so gross.

[Crystal]

It is. And I'm glad you said it because, yes, there was some level of humiliation for Shador sliding that far in the draft from where he was projected to go. But I'm also, you know, this doesn't mean we need to have marches for Shadur Sanders in the streets or nothing. Like, as far as I'm concerned, all you really need to do at this point is prove why these other teams should have took you in the second or third round. As far as I'm concerned, Like, like Tom Brady said, use that slide as motivation. So the. I. I hope he. I know that Shador Sanders endures a lot just based off his last name. Like, there's a lot of commentary. People have a lot of shit to say just because of who his daddy is. I just hope that this dumbass boy and then them recording it and posting it on TikTok. So, like the. The whole point was to humiliate him. I hope he is okay. I do.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah.

[Crystal]

Cause, you know, you. Yeah, you might be rich and famous and flashy and brassy and, you know, the, The. The Deion and his kids have a reputation for, you know, kind of walking around feeling like they the shit and all this, but he did not deserve. I see that the way. Well, yes, because, I mean, look at Deion.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah.

[Crystal]

Yeah. And I honestly don't have no problem with that attitude as long as you can back it up.

[Kid Fury]

So true. Especially in sports.

[Crystal]

Especially.

[Kid Fury]

But.

[Crystal]

But just because you see a target and maybe you think, oh, he needs to be humbled. Or maybe you just think, oh, this is Deion Sanders son. If I call him, this is going to go viral. Like, I don't know what your reasoning was, but he didn't deserve to be humiliated on top of waiting to be drafted. Like, it's already ESPN and Fox Sports. Everybody is already talking about how did Shadora slide out of the first round. And then once he didn't go in the second round, it was like everybody was like, oh no, the, the, the. And it's like you just the only person anybody is talking about. 900 niggas get drafted. You the only one anybody's talking about. So I just hope it didn't get worse for him because of Jeff Ulbrich's son's absolutely dumbass juvenile decision. But yeah, wish you could throw him in jail. Really do. It's some stuff that's like not illegal, but I still wish I could go to jail. Yeah, maybe a spanking publicly on. On Tick Tock. Since you like Tick Tock so goddamn much, let's whoop your ass on Tick Tock Live.

[Kid Fury]

Have you seen the trailer for this movie? Him with Marlon Wayans, the Jordan Peele football horror?

[Crystal]

I have, I have. You had to say Jordan Peele for me to get it. But yes, I'm pretty sure halfway through this preview I simply turned the TV on, on mute and didn't look at it no more. Once I realize I'm looking at a preview for a scary movie, I just stopped looking.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah, that's fine. I'm very interested to see.

[Crystal]

But I. That one in Hot Turn, I do want to see it too, but did you? Oh, wow. What? I guess you can't tell us which role or.

[Kid Fury]

I'm sure I can. It was like an assistant or publicist or something.

[Crystal]

You were playing an assistant or publicist?

[Kid Fury]

I auditioned for the role of like an assistant.

[Crystal]

Okay, gotcha.

[Kid Fury]

Someone who works in the industry and kind of like, oh yeah, I probably shouldn't say anything else, but yeah, right. So I'm like, that was one audition where I was like. Cuz most of audition for something. I'm like, oh, this is like fun exercise and experience for that. That was one audition where one, I thought I did a good job and two, after I was like, I don't think I want to get this but wouldn't it be fierce if I did?

[Crystal]

Yeah, then I didn't. Well.

[Kid Fury]

But yeah, I'm excited to see that movie and how it turns out. I wish they didn't change the name of it. Can we see? I wonder if the.

[Crystal]

What did it used to be like?

[Kid Fury]

I don't want to say it unless I'm. I don't know if I'm. Oh, it might be.

[Crystal]

Is it supposed to be Limetown?

[Kid Fury]

No.

[Crystal]

Oh.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, it is. It is. Out here on Wikipedia, it says, In June 2022, Monkey Pop produced Monkey Pop Productions, under a deal with Universal Pictures, bought a film pitch entitled Goat.

[Crystal]

Oh, so it was goat. And now it's.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, now it's called Him.

[Crystal]

Well, I actually think him is better.

[Kid Fury]

Really?

[Crystal]

Yes. That's how the athletes who are just so full of themselves to a point of being delusional, they'd be like, I'm him, I'm him. I'm him. So.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, yeah. I do it all the time.

[Crystal]

Okay, well, that.

[Kid Fury]

But I don't have a place. But like Goat. I always. I feel like I attribute it to sports and. And entertainment a bit more. But then also, I mean, I don't. Goats and evil are often.

[Crystal]

Intertwined. Oh, yeah, that's true. That's true. Anyhow, yeah, I'll be taking a chaperone for that, but I will see it. I love football movies.

[Kid Fury]

Nick Cannon has insured his testicles.

[Crystal]

Insured.

[Kid Fury]

According to people.com.

[Crystal]

Not cut off.

[Kid Fury]

Right. Father of 12 Nick Cannon took out a 10 million dollar insurance policy on his testicles. He reportedly revealed this information unsolicited. He revealed the information on an episode of Tea Time with Raven and Miranda. Is Miranda Raven's white wife?

[Crystal]

I think so. I've never learned her name, but if the show's called Raven and Miranda. Right, right, right.

[Kid Fury]

He said on the episode that the idea started as a joke, but he went on to insure them because they are his, quote, most valuable asset. He also says he's not necessarily done with having kids. Why don't we just set the world on fire, starting with men.

[Crystal]

Shouldn't you be done having kids, though? Don't you have, like 12?

[Kid Fury]

What more do you. I told you, he's trying to build Sparta. I told. Like this. Okay, was this before? Maybe this was after Covid. And that's where the theory came to my mind. But I think that Nick Cannon knows something that we don't. And he's trying to start a small village.

[Crystal]

To do what? To do. To do what?

[Kid Fury]

For when Black Mirror happens. Happens. You know, he already has a tiny city of heirs, and they all can perform black improv and freestyle and wild and out. All of them. Who can stand up against two dozen of Nick Cannon's children?

[Crystal]

Not two dozen.

[Kid Fury]

He said he Wants more.

[Crystal]

Well, I. Right. So first of all. Stop that. Don't do that. I had to look the story up. Cause I didn't really believe it, but I do. Yeah, they said if he loses a ball, you know they're insured for 5 million each. So if he loses a ball, then the money goes to his kids. Okay. I mean, that's 5 million spread amongst 12 niggas also.

[Kid Fury]

So. This is a fierce screenplay.

[Crystal]

It isn't.

[Kid Fury]

It is.

[Crystal]

It is not. It's not a fierce. It's not. It's not. I actually want you. No, I can. Tonight. It isn't good. Don't imagine it anymore.

[Kid Fury]

Can you imagine the third Knives out movie is about this.

[Crystal]

Absolutely. Stop right there. Stop right there. Ryan Johnson to send you a cease and decision if you don't stop immediately.

[Kid Fury]

Testicle. Testicles missing and bled out.

[Crystal]

Ryan Johnson's finish.

[Kid Fury]

Who of the 24 kids cut off?

[Crystal]

They died.

[Kid Fury]

And you found. You find out. Oh, you find out that the sister took one of the eldest brothers.

[Crystal]

You trying to make it soul playing? These are serious filmmakers, these are actors, these are professional. And you trying to make soul play?

[Kid Fury]

Oh, Nick Cannon started it.

[Crystal]

This is the funniest thing. He did start it. I don't know what the fuck is his problem.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, God. Weirdo balls are 5 million each. If I lose one of them, that money goes to my kids. Why wouldn't they try to chop your balls off?

[Crystal]

I mean, why would anybody try to.

[Kid Fury]

You have 12 of them. They probably don't even know you. Why would.

[Crystal]

I know Nick Cannon don't do shit with those kids because in that same article, he said that three years old is his favorite age. Because they're three majors and they just think they know everything. Everybody who actually raises kids knows that 2 to 5 is absolutely hell. 3 and 4 is when you most want to kill them yourselves.

[Kid Fury]

Yes.

[Crystal]

So I said, yeah, you see these kids for major holidays and they birthdays because no way 3 is your favorite age. I'm sorry, I don't know any full time parent who says that. It's when it starts. Yes, but three and four, they have more.

[Kid Fury]

Three or four, they're faster.

[Crystal]

They're right.

[Kid Fury]

They climb.

[Crystal]

Their hand eye coordination is better. Their language is better. They know more words.

[Kid Fury]

They can really talk about what you talking about. They're awful and they're permitted to date.

[Crystal]

I said, yeah, you don't do shit with these kids. You don't do shit. You see these kids four or five times a year, max. Nobody.

[Kid Fury]

That's why Your mama exhaled and said, adam.

[Crystal]

Is three years old.

[Kid Fury]

He gets on my nerves. And I'm supposed to raise all you.

[Crystal]

Bitches, all three of y' all.

[Kid Fury]

So let me remind you of something. Yes, he's evil. He's three. Stop talking to me about it.

[Crystal]

Pretty much. Like, so she actually said, you being vexed by a 3 year old shows a you problem. Like I, I'm looking at myself like, how did I go wrong raising you when you letting a three year old get under your skin like this? I'm like, when you put it that way. He's still my damn brother though. Like, you know, you still kids and so you don't give a fuck. I don't care if he's three. He's my brother, therefore he's my enemy. So.

[Kid Fury]

Exactly.

[Crystal]

Get him out of my face.

[Kid Fury]

Where the average parent, the parent for them is just like, I think you recognize me as an opp. I want to love you, but it seems like you, you want us to fight. And that's a conundrum for me.

[Crystal]

Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

So I'm just gonna hide in the closet and smoke the rest of this joy and hope that you can't find me.

[Crystal]

And they're gonna come find you and.

[Kid Fury]

This nigga talking about, oh yeah, it's the best age of human's life. Okay, girl.

[Crystal]

Sure, sure. That's what people say. When you get to just observe them casually and be like, oh my goodness, what a handful. And go home and barely.

[Kid Fury]

Cause they'd be barefoot running around the fucking Auntie Ann's in the airport all goddamn day. Yeah, they do.

[Crystal]

Yeah, they do.

[Kid Fury]

With Melissa behind them like Kevin Catalina.

[Crystal]

Like you try to rinse them off, clean them up or something. They scream like demons. Screaming, screaming like rimic in the sun. They just can't take it. How dare you cleanse my body.

[Kid Fury]

It's like you're wiping condensed sugar off the bottom of their bare naked feet. Cause they kick the shoes off like, okay, and the shoes at the gate. You at the Auntie Ann's now, just praying the shoe's still there when you get back. Cause you had to catch this nigga first. You get back, of course they're gone. So now you're flying to Minneapolis with this shoeless, barefoot bitch. And you just like. And now he under airplane screaming because he didn't get no auntie in my life as hell. Yeah, and some bitches do this by theyself.

[Crystal]

Nick, he's screaming. So then you, you trade places with him because he wants to look outside the window. So now your big grown ass is in the middle seat while a 40 pound 3 year old is in the window seat. And then he licks the damn airplane window. So you like see those? This is actually my fault. This is my fault for using my pussy. It's my fault. Yes, it's my fault. I allowed my pussy to do this and now I have to deal with the consequences. Wow. Wow.

[Kid Fury]

That's true.

[Crystal]

You're really. You're trying to wear me out like you don't like me. Oh, bless the parents.

[Kid Fury]

Bow wow was on Club Shay Shay addressing Orlando Brown's claims of them having a sexual relationship. I'll spare you the details. He denies it.

[Crystal]

I mean, I was gonna say. I'm sure he said no. We didn't. If he said yeah, we did, I would have heard about it by now.

[Kid Fury]

He said no. Megan the Stallion has announced that she's building her own Popeyes store restaurant franchise. She says it will open in a few months and preview a new hottie sauce that will be available at the store. She already previewed the new hottie sauce.

[Crystal]

The hottie sauce came out. Wait, it's different from the hottie sauce from the last time? Cause she had that Popeyes. No, it's the same one. Okay. Because I think I've been holding onto one pack of that hottie sauce like.

[Kid Fury]

You might not have to for much longer.

[Crystal]

Amen. Amen.

[Kid Fury]

Amen. But yes, it is the same hot sauce from 2021.

[Crystal]

Oh yeah. Damn. Four years ago already. Jesus. Maybe I should throw that away.

[Kid Fury]

No, you probably shouldn't even throw that away. I shouldn't eat. That hot sauce could last a while.

[Crystal]

Right? But should you?

[Kid Fury]

But should you? I don't know. I don't think you should. Might not be worth it. But. Yeah, that wasn't. I can. I guess that serves as a preview of that exclusive hot sauce, which I guess is a great way to market the new store, honey. Because she already got motherfuckers holding on to the last bit of it.

[Crystal]

Literally. You should have told me that. Cause when it's an opening up, I need it in a squeeze bottle. I'm sorry. That hottie sauce is good.

[Kid Fury]

They probably will end up doing that. I mean, you could buy Popeyes and I think I'm Taco Bell, but yeah, there's like plenty of fast food places that sell their Chick Fil a do.

[Crystal]

Where you can get that Polynesian sauce or whatever. Right? So hurry up.

[Kid Fury]

She might bottle that shit up.

[Crystal]

Let Mick bottle that shit up. Cause I'm not going where is it in Houston?

[Kid Fury]

It's probably going to be in Texas, right?

[Crystal]

I can't imagine they would put this Popeyes anywhere else, so.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah, me neither.

[Crystal]

Oh, Lord. So in that case, it's not like.

[Kid Fury]

It'S out of your reach. Like, you never gonna do that, right?

[Crystal]

Like, I'm not. But I'll go and stock up and come right back as one.

[Kid Fury]

Should you go to New Orleans, you stop.

[Crystal]

Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

You get a beignet, you get a praline.

[Crystal]

Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

You act like I have some sense.

[Crystal]

That cute ass bottle of hottie sauce Megan have. I need y' all to make that exact bottle. Y' all make that cute little glass bottle. Well, maybe you won't. Glass is expensive.

[Kid Fury]

But if you don't racist something.

[Crystal]

You know, I did say that. Like, I don't go to Houston eight times a year, so go me. Go me. Go me. I just love her. Oh, she looked cute at the Met too. Not one of my favorites, but she was cute.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah, she is. She's always cute. And body is t. Face is t new song is great. You can't tell me you always really showed up.

[Crystal]

And they always do. They always do. Are doing better and looking better than the men always are. I mean, asap. Rocky look good, but he's Rihanna's. So you kind of had.

[Kid Fury]

So no excuse. No excuse.

[Crystal]

You wasn't going to come in here in Target's finest, much like.

[Kid Fury]

What's his name? Raul Coleman's husband.

[Crystal]

Oh, right, right, right. Raul, right. I Raul said, y' all know who I'm here with.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah.

[Crystal]

And so after they dressed him, they did immediately turn towards me and. Cause you not gonna embarrass me. You not been. Of course, you gotta have the complimentary. Oh, my God. When I was growing up, there was a church. There was a family in our church who I grew up with their daughter. And she was like one of my closest friends. But the mama and daddy always. And I do mean every Sunday wore something that coordinated. Yes. Mama wore a pink dress. Daddy had a baby pink shirt with a pink tie and a pink pocket square. Like she had on a special pattern. He had a pocket square and a tie with that same pattern or a suit in that same pattern socks. Something like every single Sunday, them niggas matched.

[Kid Fury]

I really love that. I'm sure I could watch a couple of documentaries. I think I would prefer to read books specifically on Sunday's best. I know that they're out there and not just like a look into. I definitely could easily probably get me a coffee Table book and probably now that I thought of it, but just the ceremony, the commitment to Sunday being our met gala.

[Crystal]

Oh, yeah, well, slavery.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah, I mean, I know that, you know, like, but I want more like, I want like fine tuned detail about like, I don't know, maybe conversation quotes, sentimentality surrounding it and the ripple effects to today where you yourself couldn't think of these parrots who were like, not only are we going to, you know, step out and look good as niggas, especially n in the south do when they go to church.

[Crystal]

Please, please don't.

[Kid Fury]

We're matching kind.

[Crystal]

Please don't get me started. Because the way in the south will get furs that they never ever need, honey, and be dripped in them bitches on Easter. You whores are sweating.

[Kid Fury]

I'm afraid to say I've seen that before.

[Crystal]

Take it off. We are in Houston, Texas. Take off that rabbit stole.

[Kid Fury]

It is Easter and so you know service is four hours today. You're going to die. You're gonna die.

[Crystal]

Take that shit off, get you a fan and quit playing. You finna pass out and you won't be risen.

[Kid Fury]

You're gonna die. You're gonna have a heat stroke and die. Take that fur off. It's Miami. It's humid, it's 80 degrees. You don't have to show out like that.

[Crystal]

Dying on the wrist, it's honestly so selfish. Why would you die?

[Kid Fury]

Like, why would you do that?

[Crystal]

Why would you do that when you could just not bitch? Take that off and go in the back, sip you some water and eat you some goldfish.

[Kid Fury]

Thank you.

[Crystal]

You get your strength back and come sit down. Echo, you got some goddamn.

[Kid Fury]

You need some electrolytes.

[Crystal]

And keep that phone on DND while you @ it.

[Kid Fury]

You are not from the Northwatch where.

[Crystal]

Why the fuck n have furs in Detroit and Chicago and New York? Because they're supposed to. They're supposed to. It is 80 degrees on Easter there, you niggas. It's 70 degrees on Christmas and you niggas are trying to wear furs. No.

[Kid Fury]

Where did you get this? Like, what? What are you doing?

[Crystal]

Ben had niggas inherited them first. They not going to stop.

[Kid Fury]

But being like a little couple that every Sunday, every Sunday.

[Crystal]

Oh, my God, you're coordinated.

[Kid Fury]

That is fierce.

[Crystal]

I almost said their daughter's name, but it's so unique. Immediately they would be like, oh, please don't mention us on that godless show. You be talking about all kinds of sin. But yes, I always admire. I was like, ooh, I feel like her parents like each other more than my parents do. Because y' all have to, y' all, every Saturday. Y' all like, babe, what we finna do? What we finna do?

[Kid Fury]

You woke up this early with the intention to actually look good, but then also this early communicated with this motherfucker. Yeah. Oh, y' all definitely like each other.

[Crystal]

Y' all like each other a lot. Y' all. Y' all really locked in. I knew that from a young age. Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

That's why the reason I screamed so loud the couple weeks ago when we were talking about church and you said, niggas don't even go to church. Like, they don't even be there.

[Crystal]

Oh, yeah, they don't.

[Kid Fury]

And I was screaming because I'm thinking of, like, yeah, a lot of growing up. Yeah, it was men and couples, but most of the congregation were women who would then go home to their husband who was in the middle of watching whatever. Or maybe he asked her how church was. But it wasn't that they didn't have them. It was them n didn't come.

[Crystal]

I told y' all one time I asked my mama why daddy didn't have to go to church. Because if you don't go to church, you don't go to heaven. And she said, don't talk about your daddy like that.

[Kid Fury]

So.

[Crystal]

That'S when I learned that they weren't always gonna make a whole lot of sense over there, and I needed to start finding my own answers.

[Kid Fury]

That is one of the fierce things about being a kid, especially one who will just inherently grow up to be.

[Crystal]

Like, I just see what I see. I'm gonna ask questions. Cause it don't make sense.

[Kid Fury]

I'm gonna ask questions, you're gonna like. And then when you say some shit that don't make sense, that young mind's gonna go, I don't make no damn sense.

[Crystal]

I don't understand. Cause you make me go every. It's non negotiable. I have to go. But daddy don't have to go.

[Kid Fury]

Why?

[Crystal]

Daddy don't have to go.

[Kid Fury]

But wait, your response was, don't talk about him like that. But I didn't wait. I just asked, how did we get here? Okay, now I'm confused.

[Crystal]

Like, you can't. Cause pastor said people who forsake the assembly will not see the kingdom of heaven. And Daddy forsaken every assembly.

[Kid Fury]

He forsake all of them.

[Crystal]

So is he. He going to hell, right? And she was like, watch how you talk about your father. I'm like, wait.

[Kid Fury]

But pastor talked about him first.

[Crystal]

I feel like pastor said it and he got that from Jesus. So really, Jesus said it first.

[Kid Fury]

So why are you talking about Jesus like that? Then?

[Crystal]

You get a whooping right now. You getting your ass beat for having an inquiring mind. Right, right, right, right, right, right.

[Kid Fury]

That's why Slim said them blues. We brought this over here, honey. The rest of that stuff, we're figuring it out, I guess. But like, at least you can say this is ours.

[Crystal]

God bless.

[Kid Fury]

Can you imagine? I would have just like. I probably would have just been like, go watch SpongeBob.

[Crystal]

Oh, no. I know. I wore my mother out. This child won't shut up. She won't shut up.

[Kid Fury]

But is that not.

[Crystal]

I mean, it's a great question.

[Kid Fury]

One of the things I loved about Ms. Tina's book is of her talking about how she felt like she probably had adhd, but, you know, call her bad. And she was just hyper and she asked a ton of questions and all these other things. And I'm like, to me, this part of what makes a kid a kid. They may not ask you 30 questions an hour like another. Another kid, but your whole life is wondering.

[Crystal]

Right.

[Kid Fury]

And you mostly look to people who've been here much longer and you supposed.

[Crystal]

To be able to figure things out. You're supposed. Right. Like, if my mama was a real one, she would have said, yeah, your daddy not going to heaven. See, that's. But instead it was me or even child.

[Kid Fury]

Go ask him. Because I'm tired of asking, you know. Right.

[Crystal]

Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

But to flip it on you.

[Crystal]

Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

Why do parents.

[Crystal]

It's my fault. Because how dare I? How dare I.

[Kid Fury]

So the church. But dressed one thing. We're going to be though, every single. Maybe not nicest to each other. Progressive, evolved.

[Crystal]

Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

Safe.

[Crystal]

That was another fight we had because fashionable. You know, Jesus didn't say I had to wear dresses and stockings. She was like, yeah, he did. Jesus did say, honor thy. Thy mother and father, though. And your mother said to put this on. So I'm like, that feels like a reach.

[Kid Fury]

But I think we're done. Done here.

[Crystal]

My mother really tried to control what I wore to church until I was 17 and graduated from high school. She insanity. Be glad I'm going. Be glad I'm going.

[Kid Fury]

It's interesting that how so many of them used a book to kind of get us to do what they wanted in those regards. Even things that weren't involved in that book. Just like white people did with that same book.

[Crystal]

Yeah, yeah.

[Kid Fury]

And us and our freedom and our bodies and our lives.

[Crystal]

And some. Some boomers got free and some didn't. Shout out to Miss Tina.

[Kid Fury]

Though some still ain't. Yeah. Shout out to Miss Tina. That's it for the hot box this week.

[Crystal]

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[Kid Fury]

Welcome back to the show, everyone. It's time to read your letters.

[Crystal]

Yes. Send your questions to asktheread gmail.com we may read them aloud on the show. Our first letter this week comes from Angelica. So close. Angelica says, I just met with a new therapist who dropped the F bomb twice in our first session. It took me by surprise because I've never experienced this before. She didn't seek consent, so it felt really shocking and unprofessional. A few months ago, I saw a new massage therapist who legit kept cussing and I never went back. I don't know if they feel that this is their way of connecting with their new clients, but I feel like they should first assess whether clients are cool with this. I sent my therapist an email requesting that she not cuss during our sessions, and she says she can't promise that she won't cuss because it's part of her process. Am I weird in thinking that this isn't right? How do I move forward? P.S. i have no issue with cussing, but I feel like there are appropriate spaces for doing show doing. So, yeah, thanks for all you do. All my love, Angelica. The therapist said, yeah, bitch, I do what I want.

[Kid Fury]

What, fierce? Not fierce. No, not at all. Twice in the first session and then the big one.

[Crystal]

Not damn or hell. Fuck. You said fuck twice in the first session. All right.

[Kid Fury]

I assume she fagged, but it's probably.

[Crystal]

The F bomb as fuck. Why would it be fucking? Why would it be?

[Kid Fury]

I don't know. I guess because.

[Crystal]

Oh, God.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, I forgot. It bothers people. Yeah. I think this is very interesting. The question was more so about your processing. Right. Because it.

[Crystal]

How do you move forward? Am I weird in thinking that this isn't right?

[Kid Fury]

Okay. So. No, not.

[Crystal]

Definitely not weird.

[Kid Fury]

Not to the therapist in the room.

[Crystal]

Not a therapist. Well, close enough. And.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah, I just. Even if it weren't, I can't think of like a similar thing, but even if it were just like, I don't know, like a cultural thing that you just. That makes you uncomfortable that the therapist is fully in their right to do. I think it's still, in terms of moving on fine for you to find someone better suited for you. It doesn't matter what the thing is. If you aren't uncomfortable, then you likely are not going to get what you need out of the session. And that's the most important thing. And as. As unbelievably hilarious as that response was, I don't think that it was the right one. I don't either. I hope it isn't a. A reflection for you on people within the space because most people likely would not even cuss so callously or easily in a session, much less respond to you in a way. So, yeah, I would say just try out somebody new and let this. These sessions or that. Those moments with that therapist be a thing that happened that we all laughed about together on the read. And then that's that. Because saying.

[Crystal]

It'S part of my process. I have to say, fuck.

[Kid Fury]

I have to, like, I. I can tell that my. My therapist is not, like, offended by cussing and stuff, and I certainly cuss in. In sessions, but I feel like the only time he curses is if he's, like, repeating something that I said, and he'll still say it, like, reluctantly or in a way where it's like, it to me doesn't read as, like, I don't like to curse as much as, like, I'm a doctor. I have to have a certain level of, you know, I don't know, professionalism tone and so on. But he is also a black man. He's not too much older than me. I think. Hell, I might be older than me anyways. And so there's still that, like, you know, he still speaks to me as a human being and as someone who's like, you, you know, look like me. Da, da, da. I think there's that. That. That energy there, which is why I wanted a black therapist. But he doesn't just cuss because he feels like it. He doesn't curse that at all. He's very, I think, careful and sharp in the way that he communicates and in the way that he listens. The listening part, I think, would go into if he did cuss. And then I'm like, I don't really like that. Then he goes, oh, I hear you. I'll try to do it less or I won't do it at all. Versus, girl, I don't know what to tell you, hon.

[Crystal]

Right? That's what's taking me down. That's really what it is for me. Cause, like, what. What do you mean? I emailed you about this, and you were like, girl, it's part of my process. I could promise.

[Kid Fury]

What process? Where do they. Where do they what?

[Crystal]

I don't. I have the opposite experience of you. My therapist cussed pretty early on. She cussed way before I did. And I think knowing what I know now, after going to school and, you know, eight years in with her, I feel like she was doing it so that. To emphasize certain things for me or so that I would understand the severity of certain things that I was just tolerating. So that's what stuff like, damn, hell, shit. I don't really remember her saying, unless I said it first. But then she do be like, oh, yeah, fuck. I wonder if she's not like, you know, I would love to cuss more, but I'm keeping it cute. However, it never bothered me, and I never. I never felt like, you know, there's appropriate spaces for cussing, and therapy's not one of them. I never felt that way, so it never bothered me. No way. However, if it did, and I emailed her and she said, yeah, I can't promise that I won't cuss. This is my process.

[Kid Fury]

I would say, I can't promise I'll be back.

[Crystal]

I cannot promise I will book another session, because. What do you mean? Like, girl, no. So I. As far as thinking it's not right, it's not wrong. She can indeed say, I am not going to be the type of therapist who refuses to cuss. And you can also say, I'm not seeing a therapist who can't say, girl, I can't stop myself from cussing. Like, you get to say, all right, thank you so much. It's been a pleasure working with you. Please don't schedule me further. You know, ttyo that it's fine for you to be like, this is not the therapist for me, and I'm moving on and finding me somebody who is.

[Kid Fury]

Have you ever watched Stutz Stutts, the documentary with Jonah Hill and his therapist?

[Crystal]

Oh, yes, I have.

[Kid Fury]

It's really good.

[Crystal]

It is. Jonah Hill's a mess, but, yes, I did see that. I was like, kind of wish you had just stayed here with things, but why did you bring that up?

[Kid Fury]

Oh, just because there's a couple of moments in that film where he just cusses or just speaks just kind of like as he is. But for most of it, you know, he's. He's talking like a psychiatrist, right? Early. Especially early on, I think, because he was kind of. I don't think he'd been at the center of something like that. And he was kind of just. He's trying to get started in the whole thing. He's just like, talking like a dude kind of from New York or wherever he's from, but that's why. And I think that I also kind of started thinking of like. Like scripted psychiatrists and stuff. You know, this scripted couples therapy.

[Crystal]

Oh, okay. And stuff in session, in treatment on hbo. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that.

[Kid Fury]

Yes, yes, yes, yes.

[Crystal]

Before it's like that old guy right.

[Kid Fury]

Where it's just kind of like, why is this. Yeah, yeah. Like, that's a joke. That's. That's. That's for fun. Yes, but Krystal's right. Like, I think there isn't, like, a wrong there as much as what's right.

[Crystal]

We're different, right. You're wrong for me. Yeah. Because mine is more like, no, that's bullshit, and you don't have to take it. I'm like, she's pissed.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, this really must be bullshit.

[Crystal]

Miranda. You goddamn right.

[Kid Fury]

She wouldn't fit.

[Crystal]

Bull. And Shannon, she meant that shit.

[Kid Fury]

You're right.

[Crystal]

Best of luck, Angelica. Let us know how it goes. Our next letter comes from poor Hillary Banks, who said, hey, y' all, how do you.

[Kid Fury]

I know her. I've been her welcome. Everyone knows a poor Hillary Banks.

[Crystal]

Somebody who in her mind.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah.

[Crystal]

And only in her mind, she has it all.

[Kid Fury]

And if she didn't, she would just go, daddy, but I want it.

[Crystal]

And then she died, Daddy. Okay, yes, some of y' all do do that. Well, if you could do that, you wouldn't be poor. You talking about only fans, Daddy?

[Kid Fury]

That's what I'm talking.

[Crystal]

All right, all right.

[Kid Fury]

Never mind.

[Crystal]

You meant shriveled up Republican closeted millionaire who wants to be topped by a trans girl.

[Kid Fury]

Or even just these Kodak black niggas that one go give you shit anyway because they are all so po.

[Crystal]

Huh? Where you been, Lord? All right, well, poor Hillary Banks said, how do y' all feel about black people who sound white?

[Kid Fury]

Jesus Christ, y' all are just swinging today.

[Crystal]

I'm a black woman in her 30s who's always been told that I don't sound black. And I'm often asked if I'm mixed. Even though I don't look it, I really don't think I sound white. I just don't sound how black women are off are often expected to sound. I've always had a diverse group of friends. I didn't grow up around a lot of black people. And on top of that, I've worked in service industries that require you to connect with clients who usually aren't black. In the past, I've sought out groups and meetups for black people to connect, and I often get sniffed out right away.

[Kid Fury]

Damn.

[Crystal]

Sniffed out is crazy. Like, they got dogs at the front.

[Kid Fury]

They really, like she said, sniffed. So I'm wondering.

[Crystal]

When I was single, I naturally gravitated towards black men, but they usually wanted me because I was good arm candy for business or would eventually. Or they would eventually show they Ass as some kind of self loathing MAGA weirdo. I'm currently with an amazing black man who grew up similarly to me, but he's a lot more confident in who he is and he doesn't care what people think. I love being black and I still seek out black spaces, but I'm tired. Would love your opinions. Thanks. Poor Hillary Banks.

[Kid Fury]

Okay.

[Crystal]

Well, I mean, as soon as you ask the question, how do you feel about black folks who sound white? My first thought is, you grew up around white people.

[Kid Fury]

That's usually how that happens.

[Crystal]

And she said that you didn't grow up around a lot of black people. So if you grew up in America, that does typically mean you grew up around a lot of white people. So that's normally my first thought. With people who don't sound like niggas.

[Kid Fury]

I don't give a fuck. I've always thought this to be sort of silly thing to really hammer down and take seriously. It's something that you can kind of like joke around with with someone who you can joke around with.

[Crystal]

Right.

[Kid Fury]

The same way that someone could joke around with me about bits of my Miami accent or your accents from Oklahoma. Oh, I don't have one else's. Yep. Or, you know, things like that. So to me, there's like, how does your voice sound versus how does your mind and body.

[Crystal]

Yeah, yeah, that's really it. I care a lot more about what you believe in.

[Kid Fury]

It's a whole lot of niggas that I know love, care about, fuck with, friends with, that have all kinds of tones and voices and inflections and vocabulary. Like, don't give a fuck about how you sound. I don't give a fuck how you act and what you believe, personally.

[Crystal]

Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

There's a lot of motherfuckers out here who sound black who could stay the farthest away from me. Amen.

[Crystal]

Absolutely. Most rappers.

[Kid Fury]

Hello. Hello.

[Crystal]

Most rappers. Most of them. Yes, indeed.

[Kid Fury]

What are you talking about?

[Crystal]

Yeah, I. I honestly, I normally kind of feel bad for y' all because growing up around mostly white people, it's not. Even though I grew up in Oklahoma, I grew up with niggas.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah.

[Crystal]

And so I don't relate to growing up around white people. I've never sounded white, not one day in my life. But I also grew up around, you know, niggas with my parents, both have master's degrees. And so it was very much like, we black, but you finna, you know, you finna speak correct English and all this. It was kind of like that, sort of.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah.

[Crystal]

So I have a lot of empathy for, for those of you who did grow up around white people, because I know kind of automatically be like, oh, here come this cheese head ass. Like, yep, what you gonna do? Bring your white boyfriend around and then y' all leave. When somebody make a joke and he don't like it, like, here we go. But it doesn't sound like that's you. It sounds like, you know, you didn't get the chance to grow up around black people, but you trying to stay connected to them. And n are just like, nah, you sound weird. Which to me is weird. Like you're in your 30s, there's a certain amount of like, goofiness around that. When you're in your teens, maybe even early 20s, in college or something, that is low key, acceptable. But in your 30s, everybody should be way more concerned about, like, your politics, what you believe in, what you support.

[Kid Fury]

Same thing.

[Crystal]

Y' all should be way more interested in that than what she sounds like. People, you can't help that they didn't grow up around.

[Kid Fury]

Like, that's a topic for discussion when you're all 13. Yeah, like who at this age?

[Crystal]

And they couldn't have that conversation at 13 because they was around white people.

[Kid Fury]

Exactly.

[Crystal]

So say you go to college. You go to college and everybody's 18, 19, hanging out in the dorms, talking, drinking cheap liquor and figuring things out. That's part of the experience. But I really do feel like at this point, I don't care. Do you hate being black? Are you ashamed of black people? Do you think black people who aren't quote unquote, black excellence are lesser or not worthy or shouldn't be seen or talked about or acknowledged? I'm way more concerned with how you feel about black people than how you sound. Because that's not up to you, Crystal.

[Kid Fury]

And I can name at East Rapid Fire 5 Black people in United States office, like in the government right now who sound like black people who couldn't give a living drop of a fuck about us, you, or even them. So how you sound? Yeah, I think to Crystal's point, when you get to a point is like, who gives a fuck outside of who gives a fuck? I had a similar thing with my parents being Jamaican immigrants and education being the way that one.

[Crystal]

Oh, yes. Mine don't play. They do not.

[Kid Fury]

They come over here, they were like, you're black, you're dark skinned. Your family Jamaican, Got accents. If you were born here, you'd need two times as much. You know that song Ho, we just got here. You Better read these books and you better act like you know some, you know, two plus two. Matter of fact, that belt. Where's your belt? Yeah, like they. We were. I had a lot of that too.

[Crystal]

Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

So I think I have, like, I probably have a similar empathy for, you know, black folk who, regardless of how. Where you grew up, but especially if you, like, could not. If you didn't decide the neighborhood or. Or not up to you that you. You grew up in, and then you're just trying to find community again and that becomes difficult. I. I find empathy.

[Crystal]

Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

Towards that too. But I don't give a fuck about any of this. It's really not that. Damn.

[Crystal]

Yeah, so much of this is up to the parents. Like, if you grew up in a white area, but your parents are still very pro black and they'd be like, look, we might live here, but do not. You know, you grew up in a white area, but y' all still went to the nigga side of town for church on Sundays, shit like that. Versus the parents who went to white spaces and wanted to be accepted and seen as white. I think those people have a very. Cause if you grow up not liking and you sound white, you really finna have a problem over here. You are. Yeah, you're not gonna fit in.

[Kid Fury]

That's a big difference.

[Crystal]

Please don't come in with your half dry, half combed hair because white people don't notice and can't tell and your ashy elbows and ankles talking about how black people just need to go to school and read more and stop shooting you. You come over here with that and sounded like that you. Yeah, you. You are gonna have issues with niggas, but otherwise, big issues, you know, just act like you got some sense. And if people are mad at you because of how you sound, those are not people worth spending your time with. Babes.

[Kid Fury]

And man, I just respectfully and kindly request that y' all learn how to gatekeep. Like, if we're gonna do it, we need to be doing it in the process. And I think that we need to be doing it especially now. Okay, but we can't just be shutting the gate closed because somebody voice sound white. But Jack Harlow can come inside.

[Crystal]

Yeah, it can't be that.

[Kid Fury]

Stack could walk in with Mary and they her lollipop and it's all good. Oh, she family. Shut up. Everybody get out. Everybody get out. Yeah, go see sinners.

[Crystal]

We need to sort through the niggas first and then we can let in the people. Then we can let in the people who passed the paper bag test and start having that conversation.

[Kid Fury]

New screenplay. Ok. Okay. So real Wakanda, stop walking away. Imagine blacks only country. The nigga audition process. It's this long line of niggas and they walk through this. They all have to go to this huge warehouse like establishment for the audition process where you get chosen to see if you're a nigger worthy of staying in the community. And when they walk into the building, it's a dark room, a single light and it's just me and you and two clipboards, nobody and security and two armed guards. And we have to interview niggas for who can stay and who must go out and fend for themselves. Adults amongst the maga who've gone rabid and are now eating each other because you know that's what's going to happen.

[Crystal]

We're going to have to leave. We have to set up a light skinned division headed by Jade where Jade can just go through a sort through Jade sorting through everybody who could pass the paper bag test because we don't have time for that. I'm going to send my friends to handle y' all. Yes, Jade and the Nick.

[Kid Fury]

Jade's not playing.

[Crystal]

I' ma send my light skinned friends with the long hair to deal with you niggas.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah.

[Crystal]

Oh, best of luck, Hillary Banks. But yeah.

[Kid Fury]

Hope, hope, hope your voice is fine.

[Crystal]

Helped you right. Your politics matter far more than your inflection and tone.

[Kid Fury]

Like way more.

[Crystal]

Our last letter comes from Sharon who says one of my best friends, Kim introduced me to one of her longtime best friends named Laura. Since she was so close with one of my best friends, I was really excited to get to know Laura and I hope that we could all become one big friend group. But I'm starting to rethink this because Laura talks way too much. Whenever we hang out, one on one, I am barely able to get three words in. She asked me questions about myself but as soon as I start responding she cuts me off and starts talking about herself.

[Kid Fury]

Compliments. Okay.

[Crystal]

I've tried to be polite and let her speak when she does this because maybe she does need somebody to talk to invent. But the problem is that once she starts talking, she cannot stop. She will just keep going and until it's time for her to leave or if I need to leave when she literally yaps until it's time to go home. That's crazy.

[Kid Fury]

Okay, that is very funny.

[Crystal]

She's told me that she really loves hanging out with me and I make her feel so heard. I'm Glad I could do this for her, but it is frustrating letting somebody talk at you for hours without you getting a word in. And as a result, our friendship doesn't feel reciprocal. I sat her down a few weeks ago to tell her that when we have a conversation, I feel like she overshadows me and doesn't try to listen to what I say. Her response to this was that this is just an ADHD thing, and neurotypical people like you will never get it with neurodivergence. That's just how we talk to each other, and you need to get comfortable with cutting me off if you want to share so badly.

[Kid Fury]

Okay.

[Crystal]

I honestly did not know how to respond to that.

[Kid Fury]

It's so kind. It's like, so kind.

[Crystal]

I didn't know how to respond to that because she would know that I am also neurodivergent if she didn't talk so goddamn much.

[Kid Fury]

God damn.

[Crystal]

I have just never been the type of person to cut somebody off or interrupt them while they're speaking in a conversation. After that convo, I've been trying to figure out how to proceed. Recently, Kim invited Laura and I over to her place for brunch, and I noticed that Laura was cutting off and overshadowing Kim as well in the conversation. When I talked to Kim about it, she said, yeah, it is hard to talk to Laura, but that's just how she is, and she has other great qualities, so I overlook it. My question to y' all is, should I choose to overlook this, too and just work on being more forceful in a conversation and interjecting when I communicate with Laura, or do you think our conversation styles are incompatible and I should look at moving away from this friendship? I'm worried that if I start pulling away from Laura, it might affect my friendship with Kim because they are really close. Thanks so much for reading this, love, and appreciate you guys. Wishing the best for you both. Always love Sharon. Thanks, doll face.

[Kid Fury]

I love that Sharon picks, like, sitcom names for girlies.

[Crystal]

Laura, Kim, Sharon. She said, let's make it. They probably all three have extremely unique names. And she said, let me. Let me. Let me make this.

[Kid Fury]

Laura should have been Karen White's character from Shuba. Charmaine from A Different World, Fast all the time. Yes. Yeah, I think. You know, that's so funny. I did not expect her to say this, but I was like, maybe that's, like. I don't know if that's the solution, but maybe it's just interjecting and. And at some point, maybe making, like, an offhand Joke. Once you get closer, like, Laura. Laura knows she can talk.

[Crystal]

You know, Laura knows this about herself, and she has accepted it and decided she does not need to change.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah. Cause that's. I.

[Crystal]

When she said, you just need to get comfortable cutting me off if you want to share so badly.

[Kid Fury]

Is Laura a therapist? Does she cuss? Cause we just had.

[Crystal]

What a terrible response. What a terrible response.

[Kid Fury]

If Laura also had a client that she was like, I cuss. Sorry. I don't think I'm gonna be able to stop.

[Crystal]

I'm neurodivergent.

[Kid Fury]

You were neurodivergent.

[Crystal]

I'm neurodivergent. And this is just how we talk. Neurotypicals won't get it, bitch. I'm also neurodivergent. If you would shut the fuck up long enough.

[Kid Fury]

Sharon was like, if this dumb hoe would have given me a fighting chance. Just. Just two seconds with this dumb bitch edgewise. One word. I don't know. What do you think? Cause it's like, I understand what she's saying about Kim. I think that that's how she is. When you agree that this is a frustrating quality over that. That someone y' all both love has.

[Crystal]

Mm.

[Kid Fury]

That is not one of my favorite responses from people. Um, but if you're afraid, like, okay, if I step back from Laura or hangouts, then I might. It might affect my relationship with Ken because they're really close. I could understand why you might want to try and find a solution to this. I guess my questions are, how is it. Is it something as, like, I guess direct as homegirl is trying to suggest? Is it sort of attending the kickbacks, the hangouts, the love is blind watch party, and just withdrawing when you feel overwhelmed? Yeah, I don't think that's a good answer.

[Crystal]

It isn't.

[Kid Fury]

Or is it something like saying, kim, hey, girl, I don't want to go to the Winslow house no more? Laura, she get on my nerves. Nobody has talked about Trudy. I don't know where she like. And so I feel like, okay, let me say. But, yeah, because you don't want to, like, lose your. Your friend. But it's like.

[Crystal]

I don't want to. I think you could just talk about that.

[Kid Fury]

I don't think she does either. Yeah, right. But if that's what I'm wondering, like, I don't want to. Like. I don't. Is it something that you can have a further conversation with Kim about and, like, assimilate into the vibe of Yalls hangouts? Or is it something that's just like, I don't have fun in this room. Cause even when she's not talking over you, you're talking about watching. Witnessing her over. Talking to other people.

[Crystal]

Yes.

[Kid Fury]

And it seems like that aggravates you, too. So is it something that you can even get acclimated to, or is it something where it's just, like, him? With all due respect, as someone who is also a part of the neurodivergent army.

[Crystal]

Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah. No, but, like, it's a lot for me. I just want you to know. Yeah, then what is it? Like, I'm probably gonna. Like, if I seem quiet, it's because, like, what do you say?

[Crystal]

If I seem quiet, I don't want her to lose her heart. I don't like you, I guess. No, no, no. So what I would do in this situation, Sharon, I think you have all the information you need. Cause you've talked to her and you've talked to Kim.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah.

[Crystal]

So when you talk to Kim and she was like, yeah, it is hard to talk to her, but that's just how she is. She has other great qualities. So I overlook it. You can now decide, well, so now you have proof. You know, if you need an outside reassurance, it isn't just you. But also you can say, okay, she has other great qualities for you. You can overlook it. For me, I cannot. For me, I have to be able to speak. And I don't want to have to yell or get aggressive or cut me. I don't wanna have to cut you off just to share so badly. Bitch, it's not wanting to share so badly. You act like I'm desperate to talk to you.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah, that was stank. Like, thank you for circling back to that.

[Crystal]

No, bitch, if you wanna share so badly, it's conversation.

[Kid Fury]

Is this a Greek court? What are you fucking, like, Are we at the library, bitch?

[Crystal]

Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

What do you mean?

[Crystal]

You actually got me.

[Kid Fury]

We're homies talking. Of course I want to talk to you.

[Crystal]

Yes. And I'mma say this. It's too many neurodivergent people who think that saying I'm neurodivergent is means I.

[Kid Fury]

Can do whatever I want.

[Crystal]

I mean, yes, there's a lot of people who think that, and that's obviously wrong, but a lot of you just think, oh, yeah, I'm neurodivergent. Like you putting your dick on the table, bitch. Half the goddamn planet's neurodivergent. That isn't special. Do you understand how easy it is to be neurodivergent. Neurodivergent is an umbrella term for people who don't think in the neurotypical way. That's so many niggas being, oh, I'm neuroed. Everybody's neurodivergent. Well, not everybody literally, but. But I would say of the people I personally know, 95% are neurodivergent. Like, it isn't rare. It isn't special. It is not special. Have you been significantly traumatized? Congratulations. You're neurodivergent. Autism, adhd, neurodivergent, mentally ill. Neurodivergent. Like, there's so many things that fall under neurodivergent that you being, like, first of all, calling somebody neurotypical when you don't even know that they are. That is very not neurodivergent of you. It's assholeish of you. Please. That because somebody is neurodivergent, they can't be an asshole. You can be a dick and neurodivergent at the same time. Not saying she's a dick necessarily. Well, not necessarily saying that, but Laura gives. You don't know Laura dick, dickish energy.

[Kid Fury]

So a little dicky.

[Crystal]

It's a dicky. If you want to talk so bad, just cut me off. I don't want to talk to you that bad. I'll go home.

[Kid Fury]

I don't know that I want to talk to anybody.

[Crystal]

That right. You got me fucked up. Talk so bad. Like, it's not normal and natural to want to be part of a conversation that somebody else is having with you. Yeah, bitch, I want to talk because you're talking at me.

[Kid Fury]

We're not at the dmv, bitch. Yes, I want to speak. I want to have a conversation. I want to be here. I shouldn't be fighting to do that.

[Crystal]

This isn't Intro to Psychology 1103, where we're in some giant lecture hall and some poor professor with a graduate degree is trying to teach 400 uninterested freshmen. This isn't you're. We're supposed to be having a back and forth.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, yeah. Laura tried it.

[Crystal]

I would then talk to Cam and be like, I know that you love her. I know you can overlook the fact that she don't let other people talk. For me, it's a no go.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah.

[Crystal]

And. And hopefully Kim understands that everybody not gonna like everybody doesn't necessarily mean there's something wrong with Laura or you, but hopefully Kim understands that y' all not all gonna be friends. And since Laura has such A well, if you don't like it, then speak the fuck up type of attitude. She must be used to people deciding not to be her friend no more. So you can't have that kind of attitude.

[Kid Fury]

That is facts.

[Crystal]

You cannot have that kind of attitude and then be shocked that people don't want to talk to you. You probably very used to not having a lot of friends.

[Kid Fury]

Bitch. That attitude gave. She was ready for you to leave anywhere because that's what history has given it. Gave that attitude. Gave. That is not the second or third time someone has told her she's talked too much and then bounced like.

[Crystal]

Like she's the queen of wherever y' all live. Just like. Well, I guess the new bitch decided she just had to say something. Oh, she just wanna speak.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, you have opinions, too.

[Crystal]

And you got one time a new. A new bitch. I don't care if you're one of the closest friends of one of my closest friends. You don't get to talk to me crazy. Not. Not saying I'll cuss you out like I would a on the street, but I'm gonna keep my goddamn distance. I'm gonna keep my distance because I don't like the way you talk to me or at me. So that's what I would do if I was you, Sharon. I would talk to Cam Kim about it. I would not even talk to Laura because she's made it clear she don't give a how you feel.

[Kid Fury]

I don't know what else to say.

[Crystal]

I would talk to Kim. And if I were Kim, I would be like, girl, I get it. Just because I can overlook it don't mean you have to overlook it too. Cause it.

[Kid Fury]

I mean, whenever my crazy comes into a conversation, I'd be. First of all, anxiety shoots through the roof. You just ruin this person's life.

[Crystal]

Oh.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, that's extreme because you were talking too much or not nice.

[Crystal]

Oh, yes. Oh, I can see feeling like, oh, no, I talk too much and it upsets somebody. Yeah, I can see that my anxiety would be going crazy, too. Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

And if I have a conversation and I do bring up my mental health, it is usually attached to, like, apology. I'm doing the best I can. Gonna try to do better. Some sort of acknowledgement that even though there's this whatever going on up here, it isn't necessarily an excuse for what we're talking about are these actions versus going like, well, I'm crazy, girl, so get hip. Like, what is.

[Crystal]

That's another thing, because neurodivergent covers so many Things that's not telling me anything. You saying, oh, well, that's just how we are, girl. I don't know if you're autistic or traumatized or lonely or even all of those social anxiety. This is what I'm saying. Even within these larger character categories, there's a trillion other smaller ones. So.

[Kid Fury]

Fine. Neurodivergent is separate. Kim is selfish, and she talk too damn much.

[Crystal]

You can be both. You can be both. And neurodivergent includes people who are mentally ill and people who are not. It is so you really have got to get more specific if you're looking for more understanding from me. Cause that. Don't. I'm neurodivergent too, bitch. Now what? And I don't act like that. So why do you act like that?

[Kid Fury]

Cher didn't even get a chance to tell the bitch Terry, because she would stop talking. She just said everything. And then she disappeared and full of smoke.

[Crystal]

When I read this in the inbox and Sharon said, well, I would have told her I'm also neurodivergent if she would shut the fuck up screaming.

[Kid Fury]

I said, let me go ahead and.

[Crystal]

Move this right on over.

[Kid Fury]

I almost died. That was so funny. As she bulldozing her way through you for her right to overtake every conversation she's.

[Crystal]

You don't like it, just talk over me. Oh, okay. Well, how about I just don't talk to you? I think we'll both be all right with that, right? Just talk over me. What if I don't want to?

[Kid Fury]

I don't wanna, but.

[Crystal]

And the same way I don't want to. You don't have to want to. You can just keep interrupting people and yapping uninterrupted for hours if you want to. I don't have to stop you, but I can. And if it annoys me, should keep my distance from you. Yeah, you don't need me as a friend. You've made that clear. So good luck, Sharon. She does sound like a. A headache. But she's not your headache, right? Let that. Let that be Kim's problem. All right, that wraps up our letters for this week. Again. If you have a question for us, send it on over to AskTheRead gmail.com. we'll be right back. Hey, guys, when you open a Chime checking account, you're one step closer to a better financial future, okay? And even the smallest steps forward make a big difference when it comes to money and finances. With no maintenance fees, fee, free overdraft up to $200 with spot me and getting paid up to two days in advance with direct deposit. Making financial progress has never been easier in these tough economic times. We are all trying to make things a little bit easier for ourselves. Okay, if you ever want access to your pay before payday, you can use my pay to get up to $500 of your pay before payday with with no mandatory fees or interest. Okay? Way better than some of them scammy predatory loans that are out here trying to get you got and keep you got for the foreseeable future. Okay? So make progress towards a better financial future with Chime. Open your account in two [e-mail] the read that's chime.com theread chime feels like progress. Banking services and debit card provided by the Bancort Bank NA or Stride Bank NA members FDIC fee Spot Me eligibility requirements and overdraft limits apply. Fees apply at out of network ATMs MyPay eligibility requirements apply. Credit limits range 20 to $500. $2 fee applies to get funds instantly. Chime checking account required. Go to chime.com disclosures for details.

[Kid Fury]

Hey y' all. Fresh air, sunshine, good food. That's what spring is all about. Hellofresh makes it easier to finish Fit quick home cooked meals into your schedule every week by curating delicious recipes. I'm back on my hellofresh tip at the moment, to be honest with you, and I'm loving the experience because I'm doing a twofer. I've got like the butter chicken with rice ready made meals so I can just like literally pop that into the microwave for three minutes. Delicious food there. But I'm also trying to to like get back into my cooking therapy bag. And right now on my menu I've got like street cart style chicken bowls, I've got these citrus pork tacos and I love the cheesy smashed burgers. Okay. And I can make these myself. I feel good about making something by myself and all strong and stuff. And their new ready made meals again like I said a three minutes in case you don't want to do the cooking, you just want to pop something in. Maybe you got to go to work, got to get outside, got to do a backflip, got to argue with your man. It's quick and easy. Now feel great meals that fit your spring schedule and make the season even more delicious. Go to hellofresh.com 3d10fm now to get 10 free meals with a free item for life one per box with active subscription free meals applied as discount on first box. New subscribers only. Varies by plan. All right, folks, we're back. It's time for the read and for my read this week. I don't have. I don't have anything. So I'll just, I don't know, breeze through a couple of things. Kodak Black went on live recently to share that women often compliment his skin. He says that this compliment shocks him because he doesn't even shower every day.

[Crystal]

So, like, when be touching me and be like, oh, you got some soft, beautiful, beautiful skins. You got smooth skins. I'm like, what I want shower not every day.

[Kid Fury]

He went on to explain that he doesn't shower every day because he doesn't like putting on lotion or oils every day. I wanted to say to Kodak Black very briefly that your lack of showering, while incredibly apparent, is not something that is going to prevent you from a need of lotion or oils. Your skin is still dry. Your skin will still crack. Your skin will still become plagued with disease if you are not cleaning it. Now, just because you look stank doesn't mean you have to be alrighty. Your skin is screaming. It's screaming out for the attention that you are very likely giving to them perks. The attention that you're very likely giving to them sackchasers. The attention that you're very likely giving to continuously stunting your own growth and development. I urge you to just take a tiny bit of that enthusiasm and energy and put it into a steaming hot bath. I mean, scalding. Just matter of fact, let it take the skin right off burn because wow. Wow. And what a place in your life to be where you can openly admit that as a black man.

[Crystal]

I mean, it's just disgusting. It's just I already didn't have no standards for that nigga, but wow, that is disgusting.

[Kid Fury]

Like, I would have guessed, but I would have been being shady. Now it's read because here it is in the truth.

[Crystal]

You should have never said that out loud. That's actually quite crazy that you even.

[Kid Fury]

Said that you don't shower because you don't like putting on lotion. What do you like? Why don't you like you? I know I don't, but what you. Why you got it? Like, you don't you have to be in that skin?

[Crystal]

Okay, Lotion's not the only. Like, we shower because we smell like you. You start to smell within 24 hours. So you kind of need a bath at least shower once every 24 hours. Typically, you need at least one in that time frame because you just start to stink. Even if you didn't do nothing, you could stay at home all day and you just start to rot. You need a bath.

[Kid Fury]

Your skin. Your skin.

[Crystal]

You smell funny.

[Kid Fury]

Continuously has cells that die and then regrow. So you are covered in dead skin and dead things. Incapable of growing living, having an attachment to something that allows them to do so. They rot dead things. And rot stinks. You're covered in rotten stink because you hate lotion.

[Crystal]

Mm. Correct.

[Kid Fury]

Okay. I don't have to be near you, so this isn't wholly my problem. Just something you might have wanted to know. Elizabeth Olsen, please don't get on my nerves. I saw you said that someone I think, was probably talking to you about the latest Avengers Marvel preparations and stuff and asking if you're gonna do Scarlet Witch again, and you said something to the tune of that the films are just not your type of art, or they're not the art you consume or something like that. Elizabeth, we know that. We don't give a fuck. Most of y' all in the MCU don't give a fuck about Marvel comics, comic books, or anything like that. You're getting big bags. You're getting the checks. You're doing the same thing that John Lithgow happily said a week or so ago, which is getting a big old bag, big bag, don't care who has to die. Get in the bag. Let's get to the bag. We knew that's what you were doing. You could barely, barely maintain that accent that was required of so badly that, in fact, I still hate Age of Ultron. And it's mostly because of your failure at that accent and Aaron Taylor Johnson's failure at that accent. But please don't feel singled out. That movie was a flop on many levels. That was just probably the biggest part of it. That said, you've gone on to have a very successful show within that character, WandaVision, which has led us to Agatha all along, which you didn't even have to be a part of. And Agatha was still great, right? And so, to me, it's just, at this point, it's giving, what do you need? What else do you need from us? Why can't we just have fun and have. And. And. And have a good time? Why don't you just go ahead and make the movies that you make or the art that you consume or whatever your black is, whatever it is you do, and let us try to figure out whatever it is Marvel is doing now. Last but not least, I went to the grocery store yesterday, and I Saw Rice Krispie Treat ice cream sandwiches. And I just want to say, God, if you're out there, now's the time.

[Crystal]

All right, well, I don't have much for my read this week. Just a few quick things. First of all, leave Beyonce's children alone.

[Kid Fury]

You will. You're gonna do it.

[Crystal]

Please do it. Like, I've seen so much hashtag discourse over Blue and Rumi over the past couple of weeks.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, my God.

[Crystal]

Less about Blue. It's less about Blue because those of you who had so much to say last time have shut your dumb ass ass faces the fuck up.

[Kid Fury]

I bet you have, Blue.

[Crystal]

Shut you niggas up. Did you see the video? Somebody brought a sign to the show that says, we love you, Blue Manager Blue.

[Kid Fury]

No, I did not.

[Crystal]

So Blue saw. She must have seen the sign the whole show. And I think she came out. I can't remember which song it was, but I think it's towards the end. But she was out there, I think, for Texas Hold' Em. And she saw the person with the sign, and she pointed and did a thumbs up and then pointed again. It was like, yes, bitch, correct me, the man keeping these niggas in line and look dead at the camera. So funny.

[Kid Fury]

She's awesome.

[Crystal]

Oh, I have to remind myself she's 13. Like, you're six months older than my nephew, and he's doing, like, long division. How?

[Kid Fury]

Oh, my gosh. It's already so big. Oh, my God.

[Crystal]

Yeah. Yeah. He's turning 13 next month, so I.

[Kid Fury]

Have to see a picture of him. I haven't seen it.

[Crystal]

How are y' all so grown? It's crazy.

[Kid Fury]

But taller than her mom. Doing her meemaw's eyebrows, making them fierce. I watch that video all the time.

[Crystal]

It's so good.

[Kid Fury]

Cause Miss Tina was such a grandma. She was like, I look like Dracula. So I'm gonna wait to see how it turned out. Cause right now I'm joking, just joking with the grandbaby smash cut.

[Crystal]

And was like, oh, turns out the 13 year old knows something about something. Correct. Blue was like, mama, you tripping. Let me help you out. But this isn't really about. This is more about Rumisha.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, God. Oh, my God. Why can't they just leave kids alone? What?

[Crystal]

Oh, so there is all this conversation about Rumi Carter being autistic. Niggas have decided that they can clock this about her.

[Kid Fury]

And, oh, yeah, y' all are scientists.

[Crystal]

Even just people who know. But.

[Kid Fury]

But right.

[Crystal]

Y' all are currently accusing this little girl of being autistic. For the crime of looking happy, being waving at people in the crowd who were screaming her name, jumping up and down, hugging her mother, looking joyfully at her sister. These are the signs of autism.

[Kid Fury]

And y' all just never had nobody be that excited to see her.

[Crystal]

So for this, I say simply, perhaps your own children are devastated. Maybe your kids aren't happy, and maybe that's because you're their parent. Maybe the children in your life just aren't doing well. Maybe they're depressed already. At the age of seven, Rumi Carter's turning eight next month. Yeah, this is appropriate. This is appropriate behavior for someone her age. That's actually appropriate behavior for anybody on stage with Beyonce. I'm shocked the dancers don't have a moment of being like, bitch, are you fucking kidding?

[Kid Fury]

I mean, because. Let's just reassert.

[Crystal]

Let's just talk about it. I met her and was, like, shaking, crying, throwing up on stage with that bitch. This is normal behavior, period. But also, I need y' all to understand that it do not matter if. Whether that child is autistic.

[Kid Fury]

Okay? And then.

[Crystal]

It do not. It do not. Right?

[Kid Fury]

And then what?

[Crystal]

And then what? You can't be so focused on Beyonce's kids that you ignoring all the autism and neurodivergence and trauma and shit happening and in your own damn home and your own damn family.

[Kid Fury]

Cool. Why don't we talk about that? I think we should talk about that.

[Crystal]

Y' all are so worried.

[Kid Fury]

Everything seems fine.

[Crystal]

Think piece on top of think piece. Thread on top of thread about Rumi Carter.

[Kid Fury]

She's seven years old, as far as I can think. First time, actually, up on the stage.

[Crystal]

Yes, yes, first time. Especially a stadium tour. It's 70,000 niggas screaming at that baby.

[Kid Fury]

Why do we have to explain this shit to you stupid bitches?

[Crystal]

So it's either Roomy's autistic. You see why she hid that girl? You see how she don't look nothing like Blue? Meanwhile, y' all talked like a dog about Blue when she was roomie's age. So I don't want to hear that shit. Oh, she hiding them kids. She hiding them twins or. So it's either that about Rumi or is. Well, sir is the autistic one. That's why she hired that little boy. She don't want nobody seeing that little boy because, remember, she said something happened to one of her babies in childbirth and this. All you bitches sound bored and lonely as fuck. Those are seven year old children you're talking about.

[Kid Fury]

Get a job and suppose they're autistic. Is. Is it like, does. Does that endanger the world of a hell mouth to hellmouth opening, opening up on the face of the earth and releasing demons from the underworld?

[Crystal]

Let's.

[Kid Fury]

Like, if that's the case, they would be two of the countless people on the spectrum who exist here and would, fortunately, it seems, have a family of people who love them and can care for them.

[Crystal]

Yes.

[Kid Fury]

Unlike, again, as Krystal pointed out, young people who might be autistic on the spectrum have neurodivergency or whatever and have to have y' all as their parents.

[Crystal]

Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

Financial status aside, you're their parent. You could be rich, and I'd still be concerned because it's you.

[Crystal]

Right, Right. Perhaps your children are just already so brokenhearted by you and your choices. Maybe they are just.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah. Maybe they've already given up.

[Crystal]

In these seven or eight short live short years, your children are already like, wow, this nickel's a flop and it won't get better.

[Kid Fury]

Can't trust him already.

[Crystal]

At that age, they know that about you. And so your children don't display any signs of joy or happiness because they don't feel that.

[Kid Fury]

Imagine being 7, 8, 9, and knowing that you are all you got.

[Crystal]

Oh, I don't have to imagine.

[Kid Fury]

No. And I was saying. I'm not saying it to you, I'm saying it to the.

[Crystal]

I know. I knew at that age that that was all I had. I knew at the age of nine my parents were not relying liable. I knew that started my period and.

[Kid Fury]

Didn'T flip my joke. Oh, sorry. No, I'm with you. Because I was literally about to say, you all have to imagine because you got probably another 10 years before that tells you they sell.

[Crystal]

Oh, my bad. I couldn't help it. I'm neurodivergent. You have to just cut me off. You have to just stalk over me if you want to say something because I'm neurodivergent. And I have to. We just sat here and cussed out neurodivergent people, and now I got take up the cause because whether homie is or isn't, you niggas are being weird.

[Kid Fury]

Laura wasn't talking over everybody in the goddamn house because she was neurodivergent. Laura was talking over everybody because nobody in her motherfucking house will let her say a goddamn thing ever. And they blamed it on her being neurodivergent. That's why they didn't want her to talk. Now she just going out. Fucking bulldozing. Her way through every conversation she can. Cause she didn't get a chance to talk to nobody. You wanna talk about roomy and sir, talk about yourself, bitch.

[Crystal]

Lord need to figure her childhood issues so that she stops losing all of her friends.

[Kid Fury]

But if you need to speak so goddamn bad, why do you think she was so spicy? Cause probably one of her parents was like, well, bitch, if you want to talk horrible.

[Crystal]

Yeah, if you want to talk so damn bad, jump in. Like, oh, okay. And you jumped in and never jumped.

[Kid Fury]

Out, so you uncomfortable. Cause you ain't never seen nobody smile that big. I was. Are we talking about it?

[Crystal]

She's a child. We're talking about here. She's a child. So I just want y' all to leave it alone. Being autistic is not a moral failing of any sort. Roomy didn't do nothing wrong. Beyonce didn't do nothing wrong. It wasn't no sacrifices made to Satan or whatever.

[Kid Fury]

Like.

[Crystal]

Whether her children are or aren't autistic or mentally ill or disabled or anything else, you know what they are cared for, loved, wanted, valued, cherished, desired.

[Kid Fury]

Validated.

[Crystal]

So many things. So many things y' all are not. So many things your parents won't give you, regardless of dollars. Those are free things to give your children, and your parents still won't do it. So. So maybe you worry about fortifying your own children, giving them the emotional, physical, mental support that they need to succeed in this life, and worry less about Beyonce's children, who seem to be doing just fine. Y' all act like blue is out here. Drunk, half naked. Beyonce wouldn't even let her do the, uh, oh, dance. Y' all act like blue is out here.

[Kid Fury]

I didn't watch that clip either, but I saw the. Cause I am trying to avoid. Oh, I saw that cast.

[Crystal]

When are you going? When's your first show?

[Kid Fury]

Friday.

[Crystal]

Okay, well, good luck.

[Kid Fury]

I'm gonna probably snap in half. I can't, like, I'm so excited. I can't wait to scream. Dance, cry, throw up. Yeah, Watch the manager, like, correct. Cause I was. And actually, I'm glad I remembered this. Cause it also. I feel like piggybacks off something that you said. I was living for a renaissance. I was looking for her early, like, marking the choreography.

[Crystal]

I couldn't believe I was there in Paris. I could not believe it. Oh, my God. Thank you, God.

[Kid Fury]

Like, that one of the time, one of the lifetime experiences is still so fierce to me.

[Crystal]

Yes.

[Kid Fury]

Then even towards, like, the end of the Renaissance, where obviously the choreography got, you know, Better and stuff. And she got more confident. But I remember when she first started, we both talked about, like, people criticizing her dancing.

[Crystal]

Oh, blue. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Kid Fury]

And stuff. And I think one of the things we joked about was like, bitch, how about your fucking 10 year old kid and their dance recital who look just like this. And we all clap and yay and whatever, because. Go, go, baby. You know what I mean?

[Crystal]

Yes.

[Kid Fury]

You're talking about somebody who is in Paris on one of the biggest stages in the world for who she knows the stars. She's one of the biggest stars.

[Crystal]

The Stade de France, bitch. That's the stadium of France. Do you hear it?

[Kid Fury]

How can you criticize this person dancing? Honestly, what looks like their age probably even better than a lot of people at their age.

[Crystal]

Most.

[Kid Fury]

And try to make that like a bad thing. She's a kid. It's just like, why are we doing this?

[Crystal]

Of a child? And I think.

[Kid Fury]

And it sort of reminds me of this where it's like, so roomy. Cause we talked about this too. I never thought of mental health or anything. Besides, we said. Well, like I said, Rumi was like, it's about time. I was tired of crashing press junkets. I was tired of not, you know, getting to sit front row.

[Crystal]

Y' all needed to bend, bring me out here. I've been begging. And then Blue got to go. She said, now, Mommy, this is inexcusable.

[Kid Fury]

Right?

[Crystal]

And inexplicable.

[Kid Fury]

So I didn't even see that clip. You described it for me. But I saw the picture of them hugging.

[Crystal]

Oh, yes.

[Kid Fury]

And Remy turning around and had the biggest smile on her face. And it just filled my heart up so much. Cause I was just thinking, look how happy this baby is.

[Crystal]

Yes.

[Kid Fury]

Like, I have been wanting to get up here and be in the mix like my big sister and my mommy.

[Crystal]

Yes.

[Kid Fury]

And I get to do it now, finally. And these people are. They're not just screaming like they looking at me. They're waving at me. Like, that was a kid's reaction. Why does this have to be some other shit?

[Crystal]

I feel like sir isn't out there. Cause sir don't like y' all.

[Kid Fury]

He might not wanna.

[Crystal]

From the very beginning, sir has not gave a fuck about cameras and all this. And I'mma just say this. Let's say y' all and your conspiracy theories are correct. And Beyonce's hiding Sir because sir is visibly disabled or something like that. Good for her. Because the way y' all talk about her children, I wouldn't have let you seen none of them When Blue was born, Beyonce went to Tumblr and reserved hello blueivycarter.tumblr.com that was how the rest of us met that child and her beautiful head of hair. Those would have been the only pictures you ever saw of my baby. After the way y' all talked about Beyonce when she was pregnant, said she wasn't even pregnant with that child. After multiple miscarriages, I wouldn't have let y' all. Y' all would still to this day be going to hello blue. Ivy carter.tumblr.com Just like we went to dimbabies.com when Mariah was pregnant, y' all would still be going there to look at them same pictures. Oh, it's been 13 years. I wonder what Beyonce daughter look like now. That's what y' all would still be doing to this day if it was me.

[Kid Fury]

I promise. I agree.

[Crystal]

Disabled or not, y' all wouldn't be seeing my kids because you don't know how to act.

[Kid Fury]

I agree. I agree.

[Crystal]

So if that child is whatever. Whatever it may be, whatever may be going on, whatever y' all think it is, if that child is that, then I'm glad Beyonce is shielding that child from y' all and your scrutiny and your bullshit opinions. Because 90% of you don't know what the fuck you talking about. And the other 10% should be dead.

[Kid Fury]

So there's that.

[Crystal]

Everybody shut the fuck up when it comes to these, these seven almost eight year old kids. Thirteen year old girl is who you talking about again.

[Kid Fury]

As, as, as Chris all pointed out, there are all of these things that children should be and should have at that age.

[Crystal]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

There are also love. Fierce, wealthy, celebrated.

[Crystal]

Right?

[Kid Fury]

Talented, gifted.

[Crystal]

That's why I don't even bring. I don't even bring up material things because of course billionaires can provide every material thing. I'm talking about the shit you regular niggas could give your kids and don't. No, your kids aren't flying private to New Orleans just to get Popeyes like Beyonce's kids are.

[Kid Fury]

But they also don't smile like Beyonce's kids do. But that has definitely when they're not around you.

[Crystal]

You see how that has nothing to do with the money and everything to do with that child. Feeling safe, seen, heard, loved, valued, understood exactly as she is.

[Kid Fury]

That's why they wanted to go back to Covid. I mean, go back to school during COVID so bad. Get me the fuck out of here so I can see my friends and people like me.

[Crystal]

I swear to God, when Covid first hit. The main thing I thought was, thank God I'm grown. Because if I had been under 18 when Covid hit and I was trapped 247 with my abusers, I would have lost my mind. I was one of those kids who love school because it was a break from them niggas that hate me.

[Kid Fury]

It was a break. Break. No, literally.

[Crystal]

Literally. I loved school for that reason. Take me. I don't want to stay home, please.

[Kid Fury]

And we're talking and I am through. 12 children have already established I would rather be there than here.

[Crystal]

Y' all have seven year olds and you talking to.

[Kid Fury]

You talking to strangers about strangers and they're smiling strangers.

[Crystal]

Beyonce cannot relate.

[Kid Fury]

God bless y' all bitches.

[Crystal]

She can't relate to having a child who doesn't like her. Like y' all can though. It's not.

[Kid Fury]

She might be able to relate to a child that's gonna out perform her at some point. Cause baby, at this point, Blue, like, she's trying to prove a point.

[Crystal]

TikTok said it's Blue's tour and shout out to Beyonce for being there. And you know what it is? The truth of it is, in every Cowboy Carter clip, I'm looking at Beyonce unless Blue is also in that clip. And then I cannot look at Beyonce because I'm looking at 13 year old Beyonce right here. Like this is her mother's daughter. The facial expressions are coming out now. Like she's comfortable with the moves. And now the extras are being added. Oh, God, I love her.

[Kid Fury]

She's so. The one little clip that I did see of her dancing on this tour, she. It was the first night them braids were in her face. That's when I knew she was her mom.

[Crystal]

And she found her blonde wig, that.

[Kid Fury]

Hair around in the choreography so hard that that last she just had a face full of braids. And I was like, oh, she's arrived.

[Crystal]

And I am sure, I am 100% sure that Beyonce is putting that child in braids and not a wig or long straight hair for a reason. I am positive that y' all already think she too grown just for being there. So straight hair, please. Y' all would lose it. But yeah, just want to remind you to genuinely care for your own children. Don't. The speculation about whether, you know, let's worry about strangers, kids. When we think those kids are in danger somehow. Not enough food, not enough clothing, no shelter. They're being sexually violated at home. They're being abused in some other way at home.

[Kid Fury]

Home.

[Crystal]

Like, let's worry about kids not having access to quality education. Their teachers don't make enough money to stock classrooms. Public schools don't get enough funding to stock classrooms.

[Kid Fury]

Like let's work refuses to allow them clean water to drink.

[Crystal]

Basic, basic shit. These kids are eating out of boxes every goddamn day instead of fresh fruits and vegetables and. And. And meat and clean water and shit like that. Like, if you so worried about the kids, we do have actual work to be done. Stop speculating about this. These extremely rich children who want for absolutely nothing. Sir. Carter may go his entire life without looking or speaking to the rest of us. And he'll never have to pay a bill.

[Kid Fury]

I hope he doesn't.

[Crystal]

And he never ever has to pay. As long as America and US Currency exists, those children are fine. So worry about yours.

[Kid Fury]

Right? Like if they did need some form of health care, they trust they got it.

[Crystal]

Trust they got it. They're rich on both sides. Mama rich. Daddy rich. Everybody rich.

[Kid Fury]

Grandma real rich.

[Crystal]

Not just a lot of money.

[Kid Fury]

Well, big sister rich. Everybody's rich.

[Crystal]

Millions upon millions. Those kids probably already have houses in their name that are paid off.

[Kid Fury]

Probably.

[Crystal]

Worry about your kids. Your. Your daughter gets nervous every time daddy comes home. Investigate that.

[Kid Fury]

Talk about that.

[Crystal]

And that's gonna wrap up this week's episode of the Read. Follow us on social media at. This is the Read. Our website is. This is the read.com. our merch orders are currently on hold. Thank you everybody who's been reaching out about that. They are on hold for the moment. We'll let you know when things are back up and running. And my apologies. I said we were doing our Atlanta giveaway last week, but I misspoke. Girly pops. I'm so sorry. The Atlanta Cowboy Carter ticket giveaway is coming up soon, though. I do promise baby girls. So thanks so much again to Sacred for sponsoring this ticket giveaway again. We are going to be doing that very soon.

[Kid Fury]

Yes. Thank you, Sacred. I just used my. My moisturizer and oils in my beard as well as the. The tea tree and temple oud hair scrub. I actually really like that because it has tea tree in it because I already had put like a little tiny bit. I think I said that.

[Crystal]

It feels so good.

[Kid Fury]

Like a little tiny bit. It feels so good. But it smells better than when I. And then I can now use the hydrating conditioner.

[Crystal]

Shout out to the temple oud. So I love. I use the whole line. I'm. I'm getting a lot more disciplined about how I use the products because I feel like I'm letting Ms. Tina down.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah.

[Crystal]

By, you know, letting my mental health get in the way. But I love every single product in line in that line. The reconstructing treatment and that hair oil to just kind of seal everything in with when I'm all done. But, yes, thank you to Sacred for joining up with your faves and that Atlanta ticket giveaway coming soon. So stay locked into the read on Instagram. And again, this is the read across all social media profiles. So find us there. Yes. Anything else from you before we head out?

[Kid Fury]

Happy may go. Have fun at the concert if you can. Please be safe. Please act like you got some sense. I've seen at least one clip of, you know, bitches really did have boots on the ground. They was fighting.

[Crystal]

Oh, no. Okay. We're not doing that at Beyonce.

[Kid Fury]

We're not doing that at the Beyonce.

[Crystal]

We're not doing that. Down to the cowboy Carter. We're not doing that. Correct. Correct. Correct.

[Kid Fury]

But no, nothing. Enjoy your week. Have fun. Hug yourselves. Love your pets. How's Lainey?

[Crystal]

She is at school. Thank God, because she was on my nerves something heavy earlier, but she's fine. Yeah. How's Link?

[Kid Fury]

Link is good. She had a very, very terrible attitude on this past Monday because I was incredibly hungover. Passed out on my friend's couch from the. And came home, and she was just sitting at the front door when I woke. She usually will, like, wait. Wait for daycare people to kind of pick her up in the. Like, in my room or in the living room. And that day, I had waited too long. She was just by the door. She saw me and was like, hey, I'm just waiting for them to come get.

[Crystal]

Not talking to you. She don't come home at a decent hour. Sick of your. She's sick of your. Wow.

[Kid Fury]

She'll be home in a couple hours. She loves me.

[Crystal]

I hope you. You know, I hope you went to your room and thought about what you did wrong. Cause how dare you?

[Kid Fury]

Shame. Guilt and shame. But, yes, it's fine.

[Crystal]

Every parent's favorite cocktail. All right, girlies.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah, we're doing better than many of y' all. God bless.

[Crystal]

Okay, you didn't have to say that part.

[Kid Fury]

I mean, we said it, like, all the whole episode. Like, a lot of y' all suck. Do better.

[Crystal]

This is why I don't have you. My kids. Cause the bar is high. The bar is high. Hello. It's a hard job. Get a pen instead. Get a dog. Get a cat. Get a bird. Get a guinea pig.

[Kid Fury]

Fish.

[Crystal]

Anything else? All right, girly pops do your best.