Mess World Podcast – "Welcome To Placenta University"

Date: December 2, 2025
Hosts: Jessica DeFino & Emily Kirkpatrick

Episode Overview

In this lively, ad-free episode of Mess World, Jessica DeFino and Emily Kirkpatrick serve up a two-hour deep-dive into the latest turbulent terrain at the crossroads of pop culture, beauty, and fashion. This month’s episode tackles viral beauty industry controversies, celebrity plastic surgery confessions, the commodification of the body, child-oriented skincare, and, most memorably, Cardi B’s gold-plated (sort of) umbilical cord pendant. The hosts also preview the upcoming Costume Institute exhibition, discuss doppelganger theory, and wrap up with their "Mess of the Month" picks. Throughout, they lean into nuance, challenge the lazy “it’s not that deep” defense, and keep things critical, irreverent, and sharp.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Updates: Pumpkin Patch Photos & Bodies on Bodies Trend

• Meghan Markle & Family: Emily reports that the singular pumpkin patch photo to emerge this season featured Meghan Markle, cementing her “Martha Stewart Montecito light” public image.
  • [03:07] “We got one singular pumpkin patch photograph from Meghan Markle and Prince and Queen. And I…should have guessed that they would be the ones…they are a little frantic for attention and good press.” – Emily
• Janelle Monáe’s Thom Browne Suit: Janelle Monáe appeared at the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame induction in a Thom Browne suit with multiple arms/legs—a perfect "bodies on bodies" example.
  • [04:31] “So many arms. So many legs. I love it.” – Jessica
• Kim Kardashian’s 'Oracle' Moves: Kim’s editorial with painted-on clothing (“trompe l’oeil suit”), previously predicted by Emily, exemplifies how celebrity image pivots echo the ever-more-hyperreal aesthetic.
  • [08:27] “She’s done it. You’re really an oracle. A Kardashian oracle.” – Jessica

2. Anti-Plastic Surgery Essays & Nuance in Beauty Critique

• Viral Substack Trend: Jessica raises concerns about many recent anti-plastic surgery essays lacking nuance and often excluding the needs of the trans community or individuals seeking gender-affirming or reconstructive care.
  • [10:59] “It’s just kind of strange to lump all plastic surgery together…there are so many other ways to use it…It matters how it’s used.”
  • [13:19] Emily: “While gender-affirming surgeries can make someone feel more like the gender they are…that is a small part of it that is about passing or feeling safe in the world. Which is also…the oppressive standards of beauty culture.”
• Facelifts & Impact of Language: Jessica discusses her Guardian piece on facelifts, the broader dangers of beauty standards, and how “no judgment” marketing is itself a form of judgment.
  • [18:11] “A lot of the issues with beauty culture are actually, like, an issue of language and how we’re talking about things and mystification through kind of feel good language a lot of the time, rather than explicitly stating, okay, here’s what is happening, here’s why it’s happening.”

3. Cardi B’s Gold-Plated Umbilical Cord Pendant & Placenta University

• The Pendant Saga: Cardi B had her son’s umbilical cord shaped into a gold heart pendant by Julianne Marie Corona of Mommy Made Encapsulation.
  • [19:34] Emily: “I am just obsessed with it. I can’t stop thinking about this. And I’d love to know your thoughts on it…she had her son’s umbilical cord turned into a gold heart-shaped pendant.”
• How It’s Made: The process is more $50 chrome plating (not real gold), prompting Emily’s “business consultation” for celebrity-grade upgrades.
  • [24:58] “It’s just chrome. There’s no gold involved at all. Which, I’m like, does Cardi know that? Because I feel like Cardi would have wanted real gold.”
• The Morbid Memento Trend: Discussion veers into Victorian memento mori, celebrity obsessions with bodily relics, and the possible future convergence with celebrity culture.
  • [27:38] “It’s a reminder to live is what memento vivere is, which I think is beautiful.” – Emily

4. Rise of Child & Fetal Skincare: The Rinni Sheet Mask Backlash

• Shay Mitchell’s Skincare for Kids: The duo unpacks the uproar over Shay Mitchell’s “Rinni” skincare brand and its toddler sheet mask, underscoring the dangers of dismissing early beauty indoctrination as “not that deep.”
  • [33:28] Jessica: “Just let them splash their face with cold water, run through a sprinkler—there are sensory experiences that don’t involve cosmetic manipulation of a three-year-old body.”
• The "It’s Not That Deep" Defense: Both skewer Glamour’s headline and the trope that beauty norms are harmless play, tying in racial and health harms particularly for Black girls.
  • [34:05] “To say it’s not that deep is so insulting and frankly misogynist…I think it does a disservice to all people but especially young women and girls.”

5. Commodification of Celebrity Perception: Addison Rae’s “Blindfold” Moment

• Airport Paparazzi Stunt: Addison Rae’s arrival in a lace “blindfold” at LAX is analyzed as a purposeful denial of her own gaze—“being perceived but refusing perception”—relating to trends of masking, AI, the body, and celebrity as commodity.
  • [46:05] “For any celebrity that exists, there is an Instagram account called that celebrity’s name Closet…they always had it, and they will have it within minutes of a new photo coming out.”
  • [48:26] “I was just…struck by the idea of a celebrity calling the paparazzi on themselves and then…denying the public your own gaze back at them. You are being consumed, but you refuse to consume.”

6. Plastic Surgery Transparency: Simone Biles, Virtue, & Mimetic Desire

• Simone Biles' Confessions: She openly discloses having undergone breast augmentation, lower blepharoplasty, and earlobe repair, positioning herself as “transparent” and encouraging “no shame” while also distancing herself from pressuring others.
  • [55:06] “There is, quote, no shame in getting plastic surgery. And she said young girls have the right to their own choices…”
  • Jessica critiques the logic, noting the way transparency itself breeds desire and positions compliance with beauty standards as virtuous.
• Virtue & Mimetic Desire: Discussion of whether transparency about cosmetic work functions as a kind of virtue signaling and how collective desire operates.
  • [59:38] “I do think that people who are being transparent about this are trying to force a sort of moral, ethical component here.”
• Fixing “Genetic Flaws”: Jessica flags discomfort with celebrities framing surgeries as correcting genetic features and what it telegraphs about shame and normalcy.
  • [62:18] “My argument is not, like, she shouldn’t be doing all of this…but…the way we mystify it.”

7. Book Club & Doppelganger Theory: Naomi Klein’s Analysis of Shadowlands

• Colonial Mindset in Beauty/Fashion: Drawing from Naomi Klein's "Doppelganger," the hosts connect fast fashion (and fast beauty) to global exploitation and the psychic comfort Western consumers derive from these "shadowlands."
  • [70:08] Emily: “When you say I deserve to pay $1 for a T-shirt, you're saying the whole manufacturing process—those people don’t deserve anything.”
  • Jessica brings in the example of palm oil in beauty products and how self-care purchases implicitly OK global harms.
  • [73:26] Klein’s “shadowlands” concept is unpacked via beauty, fashion, and supply chains.

8. Met Gala/Costume Institute Spring 2026 – Thematic Preview

• Upcoming Exhibit: The Met’s upcoming exhibition centers on “costume art” and thematic “body types”: the naked body, aging body, pregnant body, anatomical, and the “mortal” body.
  • [75:27] “The main image…is this terracotta statuette of the goddess Nike…and I wonder if the theme might be related to…goddesses or the idealized body.”
• Trend Forecasts: The duo speculate on AI/body customization, beauty advertising dovetailing with art/idealization, and predict “body as art” will be central to 2026’s fashion/beauty tie-ins.

9. Bezos at the Met: Buying Popularity

• Sponsorship & Elitism: The Met Gala’s sponsorship by Jeff Bezos and Lauren Sanchez is discussed as a symptom of the loss of old-school fashion gatekeeping, with Kim Kardashian and Anna Wintour facilitating a new era of rich interlopers.
  • [83:47] “I know that we’re an industry obsessed with money…but what happened to being elitist? Fashion used to be a lot meaner…”

10. Mess of the Month: Toe Rings & Bad Beauty Gifting

Emily’s Mess: Jennifer Aniston’s Decades-Old Toe Ring

• [89:12] “It’s such normal, regular-ass behavior to like, buy a piece of jewelry you love and wear it for 30 years…in celebrity world, that’s insane…”

Jessica’s Mess: Sephora’s Holiday Campaign & Awkward Beauty Gifts

• [98:33] “Beauty gifts are almost exclusively bad gifts…and you would almost exclusively be better off without them.”

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• [34:05] Emily (on Glamour’s “not that deep” defense): “Chill out, losers. Calm down.”
• [41:17] Jessica: “At what age do you think it is safe [to internalize beauty standards]? Is it 10? Is it 15? Is it 25? Is it 40?”
• [42:14] Jessica: “That’s so misogynistic—writing off women’s interests as being frivolous or not worthy of deeper thought.”
• [48:26] Emily: “You are being consumed, but you refuse to consume. You’re being perceived, but you refuse perception.”
• [62:09] Emily (on Simone Biles): “Is that not a concern, as a professional athlete, that you might somehow be hindering or worsening even your performance because of this augmentation?”
• [70:08] Emily: “When you say I deserve to pay $1 for a T-shirt, you’re saying…the people who make that T-shirt…don’t deserve anything.”
• [83:47] Emily: “Fashion used to be a lot meaner…we wouldn’t let losers like [the Bezos'] in the front row ever.”

Timestamps for Significant Segments

| Timestamp | Segment / Topic | |-----------|-----------------| | 00:15–05:00 | Warm up, listener love for an ad-free show, Markle/Monae/Kardashian trend updates | | 10:59–18:43 | Anti-plastic surgery discourse, inclusivity & language in beauty | | 19:34–27:57 | Cardi B’s umbilical cord pendant and the world of placenta art | | 28:03–38:40 | Shay Mitchell's Rinni child skincare, sheet mask backlash, “not that deep” trope | | 43:06–52:06 | Addison Rae's "blindfold" paparazzi moment—celebrity self-perception as commodity | | 52:44–66:31 | Simone Biles’s plastic surgery transparency, mimetic desire, virtue signaling | | 68:32–74:54 | Naomi Klein’s “Doppelganger” theory, fast fashion’s shadowlands | | 75:04–88:59 | Costume Institute’s new exhibit, celebrities as "art", Bezos buying popularity | | 89:03–99:22 | Mess of the Month: Aniston’s toe ring; Sephora’s gifting disasters |

Tone, Language, and Style

The episode is irreverent, incisive, openly opinionated, and shot through with the hosts’ signature lowbrow-highbrow humor. They deftly bridge deep critical analysis and pop culture snark, naming the often-unnamed in beauty and celeb discourse.

If you missed the two-hour rollercoaster, this summary guides you through every twist and turn—from Victorian hair jewelry to toddler sheet mask panic to the wild world of placenta-based entrepreneurship and beyond.