Loading summary
Bill Simmons
Hey, it's Bill Simmons. If you want to see the Bill Simmons podcast live in Austin, Texas on Wednesday, February 19th at the Paramount Theater, you can. You can buy tickets@theringer.com events. Come see us in Austin. This episode is brought to you by Flight Risk, Only in theaters January 24th. Imagine Mark Wahlberg as a psychotic villain. It's been almost three decades since he went full dark side. Directed by Academy Award winner Mel Gibson, Flight Risk is about to deliver a big screen action thrill ride that you cannot miss. The cast stacked, Topher Grace bringing the laughs. Michelle Dockery showing some serious badass energy. So buckle up for an adrenaline pumping movie night. Flight Risk Only in theaters January 24th.
Chris Ryan
This episode is brought to you by State Farm. You might say all kinds of stuff when things go wrong, but these are the words you really need to remember. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there. They've got options to fit your unique insurance needs, meaning you can talk to your agent to choose the coverage you need, have coverage options to protect the things you value most, file a claim right on the State Farm mobile app.
Bill Simmons
And even reach a real person when.
Chris Ryan
You need to talk to someone. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there.
Bill Simmons
All right. I'm not sure if this is the first rewatchables mailbag. Have we ever done this before?
Chris Ryan
We did a categories mailbag.
Bill Simmons
Oh, that's right, we did.
Chris Ryan
But we refreshed them.
Craig Horbect
We came up with our listeners, sent in Cruz vs. Hanks. That's where we got that.
Bill Simmons
Was that before or after I got the vaccine? Because I don't remember anything after the vaccine.
Chris Ryan
Is this Fire Bill no longer?
Bill Simmons
Fuck it. We have no idea how long this is going to be. It could be one part, it could be two parts. That's producer Craig right there. Craig Horbeck, Cris Ryan. We've been doing the rewatchables. We had like it was the eight, nine, nine year anniversary.
Chris Ryan
Is that right?
Bill Simmons
Of when we did the heat. 20 years of heat. Which, by the way, in 20, 25, 30 years of heat.
Chris Ryan
I was at the Lakers spurs the other night and a guy shouted out from the crowd, four Heat. That was it.
Bill Simmons
That was. That's all he brought to the table.
Chris Ryan
That was Victor Wembanyama.
Bill Simmons
Wemby loves it. Four Heat.
Chris Ryan
And he's like, neil, I sent you that thing where the backup keeper for Liverpool is a big rewatchables fan.
Bill Simmons
Really?
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
How do we get him the starting job?
Chris Ryan
We have to. Well, I don't want him to get the starting job.
Bill Simmons
We Haven't.
Chris Ryan
Best keeper in the world. He's really good, but Allison is the best.
Bill Simmons
Well, Craig's been our producer since. For how many years?
Craig Horbect
Since 2018.
Bill Simmons
Yeah, 2018. We had Zach Mack initially. Then Craig moved in and we've woven him into the podcast. He's hosted a couple. We decided he had to be involved in the mailbag. I have a lot of mailbag questions. Thanks to everybody who mailed them into the rewatchables33mail.com I'm gonna go through these.
Craig Horbect
Is it mostly new category suggestions or just broad questions? What is it?
Bill Simmons
It's all kinds of things.
Craig Horbect
Yeah.
Chris Ryan
Some constructive feedback.
Bill Simmons
So I think I. I think I organized this correctly. We're gonna go through them. I'll try to stop after each question. First one, a new category idea from Matthew B. The Chris Ryan Award. Would this movie be better if a main character smoked? Yeah, it's a good idea. So I've been thinking a lot, big picture about the categories because we had a bunch from the last thing too. And maybe the move is going forward where it's like, let's say you and I are hosting. Yeah, I have a spot. Maybe we get rid of like Big Kahuna Burger or something like that. And I have a spot where it's like, you can take any of the extra categories you want, right?
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
So if it's like a flex position. Yeah, it's a flex. It's a flex spot. Maybe there's two flex spots in the pod and then we have like 20 possibles and obviously what it. What stage, the best downwaters, all those stay in. But then when we talk about, like.
Chris Ryan
How many of these categories are related to smoking of the flex.
Craig Horbect
Well, that's tough because the answer's always yes for that category.
Bill Simmons
Well, yeah, Matthew B. Had it. Dan White suggested the Sean Penn I Brought my Own Pack award for excellence in on screen smoking, which I like. Is Sean Penn the right person for that or would. Would you go Jimmy Conway?
Chris Ryan
I think I would bring Sean Penn because Sean Penn also insists on smoking in every on screen interview he does where he's like, I think that's part of the, the, the barrier to entry is like, you got to let Penn smoke American Spirits on camera.
Bill Simmons
Well, I remember when he came to the. Our old studio to do the BS pod with me and it was like a Sunday 1:00 and he stunk a cigarette stand and I was like, I really admire this guy. This guy's on brand at all times. So you would. You're okay. With the. Sean and I brought my own pack away.
Craig Horbect
I like in general, just like knowing what actors did for real in the movie. I think that's a fun.
Bill Simmons
I gotta. As you know, this is an obsession of ours and especially mine. I always. I always look for it. And when I watch the guy, the usually it's actors smoking. I always wonder like, are they smoking fake ones?
Chris Ryan
I was wondering if Billy Bob's smoking real cigarettes in Landman.
Bill Simmons
That was thinking about that in the season finale.
Chris Ryan
Yeah. Because I. I want. I. I feel like he's just like, you guys need another shot. You guys need another angle because I'll spark up again.
Bill Simmons
Because they had. Do you watch Layman?
Craig Horbect
No.
Bill Simmons
They had a gasoline scene in the season finale. I won't spoil it. But he's covered in gasoline. And then somebody offers a mistake.
Craig Horbect
He's covered in gasoline.
Bill Simmons
Yeah, he's still covered in gasoline.
Chris Ryan
He's really careful.
Bill Simmons
He's like, be careful. He's like, I'm already whatever. And he just starts smoking. So then Dan White also suggests, conversely, you have the Sean Penn. I brought my own Peck Award. The Tom Cruise which End do I Light Award for terrible on screen smoking. I like both of those. So I think maybe, maybe we just keep it in mind. That's what I really want to do with the pod going forward. It's like conditional categories depending on where we are. Because a lot of times we just put that on what stage the best, what stage the worst. But maybe smoking needs a bigger platform.
Craig Horbect
Yeah.
Chris Ryan
Let's put more attention on smoking. Let's promote it.
Craig Horbect
Especially right now.
Bill Simmons
Who. Who is our. Who' Mount Rushmore for cigarette smokers for.
Chris Ryan
Just actually good ones or the Tom Cruise to me.
Bill Simmons
Jimmy Conway. Jordan.
Chris Ryan
Sean Penn. Jimmy Conway. I think because.
Craig Horbect
So this is the most believable smoker.
Bill Simmons
Did this thing. He. He'd flip it just. It was these two fingers. But the way he did it.
Craig Horbect
Do you respect it less if they were real smokers in real life?
Chris Ryan
Is it respected more if you were able to act that well? But I. I feel like the assumption is. Is that all actors are either recently quit still secretly or smokers.
Bill Simmons
I think when you act, you're just in a trailer and somebody's like, you want to have a cigarette?
Chris Ryan
Yeah, I'd love Skinny.
Bill Simmons
And you're just like, yeah, they all stink as cigarettes. Edie Falco and Copland. Which I was thinking that maybe is an award too. The Edie Falcon Copeland Award for this character somehow became three times hotter because she smoked Blake Lively in the town.
Craig Horbect
We need to start adding visuals to these categories, too. On YouTube, like, whenever time we introduce that category, we got to show Edie.
Bill Simmons
Right? Yeah. Well, Sean sent us. What was that Twitter account? The smoking account.
Chris Ryan
It was.
Bill Simmons
It was this. This Twitter account where they measure how many cigarettes were smoked during the movie. And that's the entire Twitter account. That's fun.
Craig Horbect
It's like, how many F words but how many cigarettes?
Bill Simmons
Yeah, that's good. So this guy went through. And this was just his thing, I think. Cigarette smoking in movies.
Chris Ryan
How many cigarettes? It's at cigarette movies on X. Yeah, there you go.
Craig Horbect
That's you. That's your birthday.
Chris Ryan
My website.
Bill Simmons
All right, so we're going to step up. The smoking stuff. That's 25.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Good start. This is from Cindy Hollenbeck. Bill, you are my spirit animal, which my kids say is no longer politically correct. Ha ha ha. I love the Bad News Bears, Slap Shot, Edible House.
Craig Horbect
Cindy Hollenbeck is my mother, by the way.
Bill Simmons
This is great. She loves Bad News Bears, Slap Shot, Animal House, Caddyshack, Fast Times. Find myself nodding along your perspectives. I enjoy everyone's knowledge, senses of humor, dirty jokes, and analysis. Okay, category recommendation. In line with Cruz versus Hanks, can you find two female actresses? Or. She said two female actors, which I probably should have said.
Craig Horbect
That's why you're not the spirit animal.
Bill Simmons
Can you find two female actors as well? I'm thinking of Sandra Bullock versus Nicole Kidman or Michelle Pfeiffer versus Ellen Barkin. Meg Ryan versus Goldie Hawn. You see where I'm going? All right, So I put real thought on this. I like this idea.
Chris Ryan
Okay.
Bill Simmons
I like this Fallen Cruise Hanks. But I also think Cruz and Hanks are one on one as a combo. We don't have the actress version of that.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
But what I do think we have, I think you could do Julia Roberts, Sandra Bullock, Michelle Pfeiffer, Nicole Kidman and make it a foursome. And we could keep track of that as well, because I think those are like, Julia Roberts versus Bullock is fun. Pfeiffer we always talk about. Anyway, Kidman's got a little more drama.
Chris Ryan
Appeared in a lot of casting. What ifs. Yeah.
Bill Simmons
So I think if those were the four, is there anybody else you would put in there? Julia, Sandra Bullock, Pfeiffer, Kidman, Demi Moore. Probably a little too big.
Chris Ryan
There's gotta be somebody more recent, right?
Bill Simmons
Well, I was thinking so somebody like under 40, like Emma Stone.
Craig Horbect
Emma Stone or Jennifer Lawrence or something.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Oh, Jennifer Lawrence. So Maybe Jennifer Lawrence replaces Julia. Julia's fine.
Craig Horbect
They almost have to be the same age, though. It's going to be hard to do.
Chris Ryan
Jennifer Lawrence because you're basically looking at these movies and you're like Billy Crystal's girlfriend in Running Scared. Would that have been better if it was Goldie Hawn? Yes.
Bill Simmons
Yeah. So I almost think we just need.
Craig Horbect
It needs to be two people. Cruz vs. Hanks is iconic because it's two. It's got to be.
Bill Simmons
So is it modern people or old people?
Craig Horbect
It's whoever makes the most sense. Cruz and Hanks are perfect equals and they're obviously.
Chris Ryan
Cruz and Hanks works for super bad and it works for like. Yeah, it works for Howard Zen.
Bill Simmons
I can't figure out who it is then. Because you could go more modern. You could do a J. Law versus Emma Stone. Yeah, but I don't know if that's cruiser Hanks worthy. I mean, Cruz has been in 15 rewatchables already.
Craig Horbect
There's a.
Bill Simmons
There's a Julia Roberts versus Sandra Bullock.
Craig Horbect
There's also a humor to Cruise versus Hanks that I just don't know if it's there for Julia Roberts. For Sandra Bullock.
Chris Ryan
It wouldn't be funny to be. Would you rather have Sandra Bullock or Julia Roberts in Den of Thieves?
Craig Horbect
Yeah, it's like, you know, all right.
Bill Simmons
Well, we'll keep workshopping that one. There's no right answer yet.
Craig Horbect
There's something there.
Bill Simmons
I like the idea of Michelle Pfeiffer just being involved because as you know, I love her. All right, new category idea from Will Hanselman. As a long suffering Lions fan, Dan Campbell is my hero and number one anxiety inducer. I suggest a category called the Dan Campbell scale, given to a character or scene that makes you think, holy shit, are they really going for this as it's actually happening? For instance, the Illuminati orgy in Eyes Wide shut is a 100% Dan Campbell. Gerard Butler's Big Nick eating the ground, eating the donut off the ground. 75% Dan Campbell, et cetera. And then he says, best wishes. Thanks for all your awesome.
Craig Horbect
That's how I felt when they started singing in Amelia Perez. I was like, wow, 4th and 18. We're going for it. Wow.
Chris Ryan
They pulled golf and they're going wildcat. 4th, 18th.
Bill Simmons
What is the all time. Holy shit, they're really going for this. I really like the idea of eating the donut off the ground. It's a perfect Dan Campbell.
Craig Horbect
Maybe there should be a fourth and a certain amount of yardage scale for the Crazy. Yes. It's like, was this a 4th and 2 or was it a 4th and 12? Yeah.
Chris Ryan
So when Neil goes back for Edie or. No, Goes back for Wingro, even though he's clearing away free.
Bill Simmons
That's dan Campbell. That's fourth and nine.
Chris Ryan
Yeah. That's like I'm faking a punt up nine, you know, fourth and nine from the 10.
Craig Horbect
Yeah. But then there's some. That. It's like. It's a tush push. It's a. It's a lock. It's a guarantee.
Bill Simmons
All right, that's good. I. I think we worked that one in somehow. Good one. Congrats to Will Hanselman. Here's a question from Kevin O'Connell, because.
Chris Ryan
He'S got some diamonds.
Craig Horbect
He's out of work now.
Bill Simmons
Yeah, I think. No relation. Why the hell haven't you done a rollerball episode? I was sure you'd do it during 70s sports movie month. The mustaches, the lapels, the bonkers sport. The more bonkers plot. Jimmy Khan. I know you're all riding the high of finally doing Pulp Fiction after teasing it for so long, but to quote the wolves, quote the wolf. Let's not start sucking each other's dicks yet. I feel like every fifth episode. Bill is itching to let the rollerball discussion loose. Is he the only one who wants it? I would love to get into which current athletes would succeed at rollerball. How a rollerball fantasy would work. What the hell is the point of that scene of those rich people blowing up trees? These are all great comments.
Chris Ryan
When we finish this pod, Craig and I are going to do sort of a footnote pod about which emails we think you secretly sent.
Bill Simmons
No, I did not.
Chris Ryan
Bill is so handsome. When will you let him do rollerball?
Bill Simmons
I didn't.
Craig Horbect
My son's spirit animal.
Bill Simmons
I. I think. I think faking mailbag answers questions is one of the worst things you could do as a host. I would never do it. Now, what's funny is Kevin O'Connell wrote like four or five different rollerball emails over the. He really wants it.
Chris Ryan
Okay.
Craig Horbect
I've never seen that movie. Have no relationship to it.
Chris Ryan
I think it should have gone in probably 70 sports, but I'm sure we'll find a spot for it.
Bill Simmons
It might be the 50th anniversary. I think I had it scheduled.
Chris Ryan
Jimmy Khan. July.
Bill Simmons
Jimmy July. Well, unfortunately, we've done most of his.
Chris Ryan
Movies, but could we find three other jimmies to put in July? Sure. Jimmy Stewart. Jimmy Jim.
Craig Horbect
Jerry. Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Which current athletes would succeed at playing rollerball Josh Allen. I was the so rollerball. They're skating around a rink.
Craig Horbect
It's like a fake extreme sport.
Chris Ryan
Right?
Bill Simmons
It's like football crossed with the roller derby and it's just incredibly violent. Okay, so Josh Allen would be kind of amazing at it. He would be my pick. Anyway, Craig's got to see that one. Cooper DeJean, new category idea from John Hageman. Here it is. Was there a porn parody of this movie? He just wants to know. Yeah, could be a quiz style format that would generate some surprising results. I'm pretty sure the answer is yes for the Blair Witch Project. I immediately thought about how bad this would be for Google and viruses.
Craig Horbect
Yeah, I'll have to buy a I.
Bill Simmons
Did find a Reddit thread of of like 150 porn parody titles that actually happened.
Chris Ryan
Was that on the Bill Simmons Reddit?
Bill Simmons
It was not. It was on some movies Reddit there.
Craig Horbect
Are definitely porn parodies. For most popular movies I went do those. I don't know.
Bill Simmons
I went through and found some that have actually been done of movies we did on the rewatchables including Shaving Ryan's Privates.
Craig Horbect
Right.
Bill Simmons
Titty Slickers. I don't remember that one. Forest Hump, The Sperminator Come and Comer. Oh yeah. Didn't know that existed. What about Boob Die Hard on yeah, Good. When Harry Sally, Legs Wide Shut, Goodwill, Humping My Best Friend's Wedding with two T's and then Glad He Ate Her Gladiator.
Craig Horbect
We should make you guys come up with the porn title for every.
Bill Simmons
Well I, there's something there. I, I, I do think it is going to be when we're doing one now doing one going forward I will check to see if there was a porn parody.
Chris Ryan
So like for Manchester by the Sea, what would be the porn?
Bill Simmons
I don't, they probably didn't do that one. Do they still make porn in the CC now it's just like now they just do scenes. Do they even make movies anymore?
Chris Ryan
That's why I was asking Craig.
Bill Simmons
He's younger, you know, Craig's like Sean, I don't know Category idea from Jordan Grimmer Best worst five word summary of the movie Similar to Bill's movie trailer elevator pitch idea panelists offer their best or worst five word summary of the movie or their impression of the movie. Example heat an LA bank heist unravels or a guy reads book about medals. So I guess before we get in the categories we would all have to do a five word summary of the movie. Yeah, I'm not against this or if.
Craig Horbect
I haven't seen the movie, you guys text me your five word summaries.
Bill Simmons
This is what. Yeah, like we're explaining to Craig with the movie is in five words.
Chris Ryan
Godfather. Italian American family goes through decades.
Bill Simmons
That's six words.
Craig Horbect
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Yeah. I don't know. I like the game of it. We may try it for a couple.
Chris Ryan
Italian American family eats dinner.
Bill Simmons
Yeah. A big picture question from Captain Jack. What movie? I'm glad Captain Jack's doing well. By the way, what movie have you always wanted to do but you were scared nobody would listen? Also, what movie have you always wanted?
Chris Ryan
Us.
Bill Simmons
Well, also what movie have you always wanted to do and are scared nobody would listen, but you're doing it anyway. Sierra, you want to go?
Chris Ryan
I mean, Cruising was the movie that I think we had teased for a really long time that we were like, would 17.
Bill Simmons
We'll never actually do it.
Chris Ryan
And then I feel like culture met us kind of where we were. And now they had like a little bit of a revival.
Bill Simmons
Blu Ray 4K cruising coming out in March. Seriously? The 4 4K? 4K?
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Are we doing the recruising when that comes out?
Chris Ryan
What about you?
Bill Simmons
All right, so the movie I've always wanted to do but I was scared nobody would listen is Eddie and the Cruisers, which we've talked about forever, which.
Chris Ryan
Is also hard because Eddie and the Cruisers is not on streaming. Correct.
Bill Simmons
It's not on streaming. You and I, you told me it was on tmc. I have it on cable. It's. It's saved on my thing. Craig's never seen it. It really hurts my feelings that it's not available. I don't. Everything's available. How is it not on tv?
Chris Ryan
We've broken through that barrier before. We got. Pump up the volume. Back on streaming.
Craig Horbect
The only one. That was tough. I actually got a text from a friend of a friend who is a Die hard Rewatchables fan and they watch every movie that we cover. And she was asking how she could find the vanishing with.
Bill Simmons
It's gone.
Craig Horbect
You can't find it.
Chris Ryan
The American Vanishing is gone.
Craig Horbect
The American Vanishing is really interesting. You can't stream it anywhere.
Bill Simmons
Craig, drink the coffee. Eddie and the Cruisers needs to come back to be you greedy. You're making so much money right now. You guys don't think we haven't noticed rewatch. Most movies are on your character.
Chris Ryan
Watching football the other day and it was just like to be this and to be that. I was like, oh, look who's come out. Decided to play with the big boys.
Bill Simmons
Oh, you think you're better than us to be. Just put Eddie and the Cruisers on there and. And. Or else we're declaring.
Craig Horbect
So yours was Cruising.
Chris Ryan
That was the one that I was.
Bill Simmons
You didn't pick.
Chris Ryan
This will be our last pot if we actually go for it.
Bill Simmons
But what's your one you want to do now but you're scared nobody would listen. I mean, you've certainly sent me a couple. Why can't you just know on top of your head? Pre vaccine, you would have been able to come.
Craig Horbect
So this is just niche movie that you love but nobody else cares about or you think it's too controversial.
Chris Ryan
It would probably be. I. I honestly can't. The cruising would just like, be like. If you can do cruising, if you can do Proof of Life, anything. If you can do pump up the volume of the volumes not available to be seen.
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Chris Ryan
Then what can't you do?
Craig Horbect
True.
Bill Simmons
Yeah. So, like, Caro's Way is too big.
Chris Ryan
It's huge. I mean, I'm. I'm dying to do that.
Bill Simmons
So what movie have you always wanted to do and are scared nobody would listen, but you might do it anyway? I. I want to do Jim Kata at some point. I might. That might be a. Me and Kyle Branter.
Craig Horbect
Jim.
Bill Simmons
Yeah, it's. I. I'm not even going to tell you what it's about.
Craig Horbect
Give me the five. The five word.
Bill Simmons
So it's after the 84 Olympics. It's Kurt Thomas, this gymnast that was. Won a gold medal, and they kind of make it. It's an action movie. He gets. He goes to some country and he's got to rescue somebody. But during the movie, the action scenes, there's somehow gymnastics in them. So there's like a pommel horse where he fights a guy, but he swings in the pommel horse. I can't even describe how awful this movie is. And I was thinking Jim K. Might be mine. All right, next one. This one's for you, C.R. it's from Bobby Sleath. Two E's. I listened to the There Will Be Blood episode and laugh my fucking ass off when CR did the Jackson mainline from Star is Born and Daniel Plainview's voice.
Chris Ryan
I'd forgotten. I did, though.
Bill Simmons
I'd like to have another look at your face, please. Turn around.
Chris Ryan
I'd like to look at your face.
Craig Horbect
Get another look at you.
Bill Simmons
Therefore, I'd like to nominate Daniel Plainview as consideration for would this movie be better with category and suggest that Wayne Jenkins sends some of the other candidates away for a very long time. Yeah, well, so I love adding Daniel Plainview to that. That's a great idea.
Chris Ryan
I feel like there should be a promotion and relegation system for the.
Bill Simmons
We've already got rid of a couple people.
Chris Ryan
Yeah. But we also. We got rid of one and added.
Craig Horbect
But there needs to be like five or seven.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Craig Horbect
And you get.
Bill Simmons
Do you feel like you have some plain view in you in 2025? Yeah. All right, so we'll add him.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Craig Horbect
What else are you working on at home?
Bill Simmons
There's another one coming up that's even better.
Chris Ryan
Jerry Jones. Would this movie have been improved with an eight minute Jerry Jones monologue?
Bill Simmons
That's a good idea. I'm gonna throw that in. A sequel question.
Chris Ryan
Black Panther would be improved if Jerry Jones was just like, here' How I.
Craig Horbect
Bun sit in front of a Q card for three minutes.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
What. What would. When that happened, at what point during the scene did you realize it was awesome? It took about 40 seconds for me. And then I was like.
Craig Horbect
When he got a little misty.
Bill Simmons
Yeah. I was like, wow, am I. Am I on drugs? Or is this really.
Chris Ryan
I also think that when they cut away to Billy Bob and Ham and the various, like, reaction shots, they. They seem legit impressed.
Bill Simmons
Yeah, I did. I asked him and Ham said there was. There was some editing.
Chris Ryan
Oh, yeah.
Bill Simmons
I think Ham felt upstaged.
Craig Horbect
Calling out Jerry, he was like, settle down.
Chris Ryan
Well, they're like, don Draper, why don't you lie there with some tubes up your nose while I know his owner does a 10 minute scene?
Bill Simmons
Does Don Draper come back?
Chris Ryan
No.
Bill Simmons
Okay. A sequel question from Stephen McDonald's with Den of Thieves 2 out now and Heat 2 being worked on, have you asked Affleck what the Town two would look like? The answer is yes. I bring it up probably every time I've ever talked to him, he suggests, no, this is the emailer. Would Shine, who has strong gem traits, be all grown up running a crew and tracking down Dougie, who may or may not be Shine's pop? That's a possibility. Would they be in conflict or would Doug come out of retirement to mentor or both? Or is there a whole new storyline with Shine and Krista out of the picture? My. My feeling is. So Doug ends up in Florida, right? Florida Keys.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Right. He's checked out. He's got money. I think Shine has grown up and is involved in Charlestown again, and somehow somebody's in danger.
Chris Ryan
How old is Shine? In the movie?
Bill Simmons
Shine's a little kid, so that's.
Chris Ryan
She's like 20 now. Okay.
Bill Simmons
Shine would be 20. And maybe her and her boyfriend now are running Charlestown. And somehow Doug. Somebody in Doug's life is in danger.
Chris Ryan
Okay.
Bill Simmons
Right.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
And he had. And he has to go back and save.
Chris Ryan
So you wanted to go back to Boston. You don't want Miami, the town.
Bill Simmons
Well, that could be the other way it goes. Is Shine and her. Her boyfriend who's basically like Gary Oldman and true romance.
Chris Ryan
Yeah. Wash up in Florida.
Bill Simmons
He's like, we got to get our revenge on in the Florida Key. And then it becomes this Florida Keys crossing the town.
Chris Ryan
Yeah. They could go down and get some mojitos.
Craig Horbect
A little running scared.
Bill Simmons
Right?
Craig Horbect
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Here's the thing. I think the town has to happen. I think there has to be a heist, and I think it has to be in Boston.
Chris Ryan
Is there another iconic Boston landmark that could be robbed beyond Fenway Park?
Bill Simmons
Yeah. And the Boston Garden's gone. Not like Fenway. No, I don't think so. Maybe they could rob Harvard.
Chris Ryan
Oh, yeah.
Bill Simmons
Goodwill hunting cross.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Craig Horbect
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
These spoiled brats. Rich kids going to have it. Get that money back.
Chris Ryan
Rob Harford. What are you gonna rob?
Bill Simmons
I don't know.
Chris Ryan
Important documents.
Bill Simmons
I don't know. So you had said it in Massachusetts or the Keys.
Chris Ryan
Florida. I think people try to redo this, like, when they do sequels. I think they try to just run back the hits instead of, like, expanding.
Craig Horbect
Yeah.
Chris Ryan
And I think it would be really cool if it, like, Shine shows up in Florida and is like, I need a million bucks by next week. Or these guys in Boston are gonna kill me because my boyfriend's gotten us in trouble.
Bill Simmons
Shine shows up and Doug is like.
Chris Ryan
I'll give you one last job for you.
Bill Simmons
Shine shows up. It seems good initially. How'd you find me? We have a How'd you find me? Scene.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Then we have. I'm just drifting around, blah, blah, blah. But then she.
Chris Ryan
Do you bring Blake Lively back?
Bill Simmons
Oh, yes. We absolutely bring Blake Lively back. She allowed to work still? She's okay. Yeah. She's back. Think. Yeah, right.
Craig Horbect
We just won't cast Baldoni in it. He's out.
Bill Simmons
Baldoni is the bad guy. This is it. This is how. This is how we play together.
Chris Ryan
We bring all the five families.
Bill Simmons
The drug lord in Florida Keys. I will say, I think the Florida Keys is one of the great underrated movie TV locations. I was so always.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Craig Horbect
There could be a Florida movie month, probably, right?
Bill Simmons
Oh, yeah. What was the movie. What was the TV show we liked on Netflix? Bloodline. Bloodsport.
Chris Ryan
Bloodline. That was set in the Keys.
Bill Simmons
I watched that.
Chris Ryan
Jesus.
Bill Simmons
Where this already been?
Chris Ryan
You just did like the other day. You did like, here are the last 25 years of NBA history. You're like, oh, I can't remember.
Bill Simmons
Baldoni is in this bloodline. Had the guy Mendelssohn who ended up in. In. Yeah, in Ozark. It had our guy Kyle Chandler.
Chris Ryan
Ben Mendelson's not in Ozark.
Bill Simmons
Wasn't he? No, he was season three season. Oh, maybe he wasn't.
Craig Horbect
No, I'll get on it.
Bill Simmons
Who was the brother. Who was Laura Linney's brother in Ozark? That was. Oh, yeah, you're right. I'm mixing up my character actors. I love. I like the Keys. New category from Jordan G. How about a best call out? Or what I like to call the Lieutenant Weinberg Award for a character unnecessarily calling someone out. What did Colonel Jessup have against Lieutenant Weinberg? Well, it was veiled anti Semitism. For example, in old school, when Will Ferrell goes streaking, he says, come on, Snoopa Loop. Or in Super Bad, when Jonah Hill calls out Dave Franco and Jim soccer for pissing himself as a kid. Who says no to this category? You. You editorial director Ryan. I'm not against it. We could throw it into the. Into the possibles. Yeah, I'm going to keep an eye out for it. I don't know how many movies have this.
Chris Ryan
I think that happens a lot. Like in spy thrillers. Like, you'll all of a sudden get the Ed Norton Chris Cooper character to like start screaming at people who are like, God damn it, I need a secure line. And you're just like, whoa, this guy was just getting coffee a second ago.
Bill Simmons
So maybe it's like the Lieutenant Weinberg Drive by shooting award for.
Chris Ryan
I like that. Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Unexpected. Like drive by shooting of somebody else in the movie.
Craig Horbect
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
All right. I don't mind that one. This is. This is a good one. We're not going to be able to give it out that often. It's a new category from Jake Oakman. Some interesting names. The Jules Winfield, that Guy graduation award winner, that Guy gal. So on the world that they go from becoming that guy to an actual.
Craig Horbect
Name, it was this role, this movie, that elevated them.
Chris Ryan
Yes. So, like, I think Giamatti and Sideways is a really good one from this. Right.
Bill Simmons
Great one. So he says this is named after the greatest that Guy graduation in history. When Sam Jackson played Jules and went from that guy from Goodfellas or Jurassic park to Samuel motherfucking L. Motherfucking Jackson. Other examples he Had Bradley Cooper in the Hangover, Glen Powell and Top Gun Maverick.
Craig Horbect
This is a great category and it can be within the Joey Pants Award.
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Chris Ryan
Is there a graduation day in this film?
Bill Simmons
So I thought then Boogie Nights had two Wahlberg Cheetle. No, it had John C. Riley and Philip Seymour Hoffman. Oh, I think before and after I didn't. I knew John C. Riley, but I didn't. And then after that I was like John C. Riley. I love that guy.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
So. But Sam is the best one. So I'm going to keep an eye on this one too. I like the graduation concept. Just a fact from Todd A. In Dublin, Ohio. Love the rewatchables. Big fan of all things. The ringer. I can't believe you guys can spend so much time on the woman Veranders and not cover the fact that Gretchen Moles real life husband Todd Williams used to be married to Fomke Janssen. The guy pulled off the real life reverse Mike McD. Didn't know that. Didn't come up with a half asset research.
Chris Ryan
How is it that that's. We've done rounders twice. We've done Rounders twice and that never came up.
Bill Simmons
This is really good. New category from Rob Shire. The Steven Seagal Hard to Kill. A word for. Did the sex scene in the movie need a better intimacy coordinator?
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Remember?
Chris Ryan
I guess Roadhouse would have this. Maybe Basic Instinct.
Craig Horbect
Sure.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
I just like having a Steven Seagal category. Remember when you didn't know who he was and then we brought him into your life and it was one of the best things we ever did?
Craig Horbect
Now I watch Under Siege Weekly.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Craig Horbect
Yeah.
Chris Ryan
Steven Seagal heard about no intimacy coordinator and Anora and he was like, I respect it. We didn't have one on Hard to Kill either.
Bill Simmons
Good move.
Chris Ryan
Way to go.
Bill Simmons
Shawn Baker category idea from Mark in Ottawa. This didn't quite get there, but I wanted to hit it for movies that have a huge twist. Rate any movies. Crazy unexpected twist. And then he said I actually thought of this when listening to the Sixth Sense podcast, which is clearly a 10 out of 10 for a twist. Psycho's 10 out of 10. Darth Vader being Luke's dad. The Matrix. 9 out of 10 humans are just batteries. Fight Club 8 out of 10. You could also have fun when the intended surprise twist is blatantly obvious. Oregon still being alive in Twin in the Two Towers was a 1 out of 10. I don't know what that means.
Chris Ryan
Aragorn.
Bill Simmons
Aragorn.
Craig Horbect
Yeah. Lord of the Rings.
Bill Simmons
So that's a 1 out of 10 twist.
Chris Ryan
I guess so, yeah, there's. There's not a lot of twists.
Bill Simmons
And so next time we do a movie with a twist, I think maybe we bring in the scale.
Craig Horbect
But then is twin towers coming in 2025?
Bill Simmons
It's not.
Chris Ryan
Okay.
Bill Simmons
But then this is the end of.
Chris Ryan
The email I've period Bill getting into to be.
Bill Simmons
I've also got a related entertaining story about another plot twist movie. Star Trek the Wrath of Khan. My Trekkie buddies and I went opening night, the 7pm show sold out. So we just waited in line for the 9:30. When the 7pm show lets out, one of the guys yells out, spock dies at the end parentheses. Personally, I'd rate this an 8 out of 10. Some large guy who is in line next to us for the 9:30 steps out of line, punches the guy out, and then calmly walks back into our line. Moral of the story, don't mess with the Trekkies. That would have been an amazing thing to see in person.
Chris Ryan
I have a similar story to this, which was like spring 96, like whenever menace to Society came out. Yeah, I had already seen it in theaters and was going back for the second time with a bunch of friends, but like, was a kid and couldn't control myself. So I was like, then there's just a fucking amazing shot when they go through there. And then this guy's like, bang and bang. And this dude just turns around, he goes, excuse me, I haven't seen the movie yet. I just like melted.
Bill Simmons
That's it. You're like, I'm never talking in line again.
Craig Horbect
I had a college professor, I was in a. I took a film class and he was talking about movie spoilers and how if you haven't seen these certain movies, there's like a. There's a certain amount of time where if you haven't seen it, he didn't care.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Craig Horbect
He asked the class, it was a big class, 2, 300 people. He said, raise your hand if you haven't seen the sixth sense. I hadn't yet. And maybe 18, 20, 25 people raised their hand out of 300. And then he goes, bruce Willis is a ghost. And I was just like, are you fucking kidding me? And then he was like, has anyone here seen Fight Club? And I hadn't yet. And I got up and I left.
Chris Ryan
Did you really go back to the class or did you drop it right there?
Craig Horbect
No, I just left for the rest.
Bill Simmons
I was like, do that. Yeah. He's so weird.
Craig Horbect
That guy sucked. I forget his name, but I Told.
Bill Simmons
The story in the usual suspect spot. I told the story when Jacko made me mad and I ruined Usual Suspects for him. That was the proudest I've ever been. He was being a dick. I was like, Kevin Space.
Craig Horbect
There's nothing worse than spoiling a movie for somebody.
Bill Simmons
Category suggestion from George in the uk, The Forrest Gump Premature Ejaculation Award. What do you think this is?
Craig Horbect
Movie ended too quickly.
Bill Simmons
Yeah. The movie finishes sooner than you'd expected.
Chris Ryan
I was wondering what the reverse of this would be. Like, what is the. They went on for another 20 or 30 minutes longer than the Viagra. Yeah, it's just like the one more pump. Like. Like, what is. What is the Reverse Force Gump that. Where you're like, oh, wow.
Bill Simmons
So.
Chris Ryan
Damn it.
Bill Simmons
Thieves.
Chris Ryan
Like, we're still going, huh? Now we're in England.
Craig Horbect
This movie ended four times. Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Yeah. Who. Who did that in a movie? I was gonna say Bradley Cooper and Limitless. Oh, it's the Dirk Diggler.
Chris Ryan
Yes.
Bill Simmons
Jack.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
I can do it again. Yeah. All right. A request from Michael Broussard. I love your podcast on the Rewatchables. I'm 44. Enjoy listening to you guys talk about films that I love. I've been waiting a long time for you to do the Hunt for Red October. Many fans and I consider this an important film to cover, as it was masterfully done with an outstanding cast. Please consider this movie for us raging.
Chris Ryan
Fans, one of my favorite films.
Craig Horbect
So this is just a request. No question. Just do reason.
Bill Simmons
We haven't done it yet.
Chris Ryan
Chris knows the reason because we're going to go to war with Russia and you're waiting for the right peg.
Bill Simmons
I told you to watch Inside Moves. And I do Hunt for October. You fucking watch it all of 2024. See, I think this guy Michael Broussard, sitting there waiting for us in October.
Chris Ryan
We.
Craig Horbect
There's a. We have an opportunity for a fun trend every year where. Where Chris and Sean have to make you watch a movie that we do in the rewatchables. And then you have to make the two of them watch a movie that.
Bill Simmons
We do in the rev category coming up. But just. Just so you know, that's what's.
Chris Ryan
That's what we're hanging greedy overlords at Tubi. I will put it on.
Bill Simmons
And Selfish Chris Ryan. And meanwhile, Inside Moves on Tubi. At least for now.
Chris Ryan
I'm going to put it up on letterbox. You'll see it when I watch Inside Moves. It's going to be this weekend.
Bill Simmons
You know What? I won't see it because I'm not on letterbox.
Chris Ryan
I'll take a screenshot and send it to you.
Craig Horbect
Oh, what?
Bill Simmons
See our watch tonight. Oh. Theme month suggestion from Logan Van Winkle. These names are like nuts.
Chris Ryan
Because they're all from you.
Bill Simmons
Yes.
Craig Horbect
All AI generated.
Bill Simmons
So this is an interesting theme month. Rotten rewatchables. A month of rewatchables that deserve better on Rotten Tomatoes and currently hold a score of 50% or less. Suggestions? Billy Madison, Ace Ventura, Rat Race.
Chris Ryan
Didn't we do some kind of invert? No. Is that on Big Picture? I can't remember. Did we do some inverted month or something like that?
Craig Horbect
No.
Bill Simmons
I used to do the Rotten Tomatoes scores before Raj and Fantasy would get super upset about it and it just like.
Chris Ryan
But now you do Roger Ebert as ChatGPT. Which is more offensive than Rotten Tomatoes or brilliant?
Bill Simmons
Depends where you're sitting.
Chris Ryan
Is your dream to replace me and Sean and Craig with actual Siskel and.
Bill Simmons
Ubert Chat GT Is that possible? Technology? Yeah.
Craig Horbect
We're a couple years away.
Bill Simmons
I don't mind the idea of Rotten Month. I'd have to look to see what movies there's been. Definitely been some movies.
Chris Ryan
I would like to see the stats on the movies we've done. Like how many below sub 50 percenters.
Craig Horbect
A decent amount, I bet.
Bill Simmons
Do we need like a. Like a Billy? Who's the guy in Moneyball? Billy Bean's assistant.
Chris Ryan
Paul Dupatesta.
Bill Simmons
No, but the fake. The fake positive character. Yeah, Jonah's fake character. We need like a Jonah Hill for the rewatch.
Chris Ryan
A stats guy.
Craig Horbect
Advanced analytics.
Bill Simmons
Yeah, just like an advanced analytics.
Chris Ryan
There's some really good spreadsheets out there. People. People do the work. We have to. I just have to look them up.
Craig Horbect
Yeah. It would be fun to know the worst rated movie we've ever done.
Bill Simmons
Well, the most disliked movie ever done was Country Strong. People are still upset, but we did that for your wife, Liz.
Craig Horbect
Kelly, the movie's not that bad. People need to relax.
Bill Simmons
People can off category idea from Connor Cussin. A suggestion for a new category is when would I have Died? You're the main character, a member of a team crew. At what point in the movie do you think you actually would have died? Example. In Die Hard, Carl's brother kills me in five seconds.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Oh, I like this one.
Craig Horbect
This is good.
Bill Simmons
Really solid.
Chris Ryan
I have a couple. They're pretty obvious, though. Like, I think I would have swum out after the girl in the first scene of Jaws. Like, I would have just been like.
Bill Simmons
Oh, so you die in Jaws immediately.
Chris Ryan
First scene, I'm not making any of the leaps in Raiders in the first with the boulder rolling behind me.
Bill Simmons
The boulder just gets you.
Craig Horbect
Yeah.
Chris Ryan
I just don't have much of a broad jump. Then there are moments where I might have died as a bystander, which I really like. Which is like my financial advisor is right by the bank robbery in Heat. So I can imagine like coming out being like, I'm really glad I invested in my Roth. I just get like.
Bill Simmons
That'S a good one.
Chris Ryan
What about you?
Craig Horbect
This is a good category.
Bill Simmons
Well, I was thinking about Castaway.
Chris Ryan
Uh huh.
Bill Simmons
How long I would have kept it.
Chris Ryan
Out of the alley.
Bill Simmons
Yeah. Not knowing what was happening with sports. Forget about family. Like just be like, fuck, what's going on in the NBA playoffs right now? It's April 19th. I wonder who's in round one. Yeah, I think I would have probably attempted what he did with the raft. Trying to get over way sooner. I'm probably dead within a year. Amityville Hara was another one. I was thinking I, I, I probably would have stayed in the house too late.
Craig Horbect
Yeah.
Chris Ryan
I mean you're currently doing it, right?
Bill Simmons
Well, no, we, we're good.
Chris Ryan
We have a good relationship with the ghost.
Bill Simmons
Yeah, it's okay. It's the best it's been.
Chris Ryan
But did you have like a mediator come in?
Bill Simmons
What happened? No, it's good. Ghost likes us. What do you, what do you have anything good?
Craig Horbect
Any zombie apocalypse movie? I'm, I'm actually probably just ending it myself. Like I am legendary. There's no way I could get anywhere close to where Will smith got I'm first 10 minutes, I'm just ending it. I see one zombie, it's over.
Bill Simmons
I was thinking, I was saying to my wife because I told her about this category because I can't see unless I have contacts or glasses. I was thinking basically everything before 1920, I'm gone.
Chris Ryan
Oh, like you couldn't.
Bill Simmons
I can't. Like yeah.
Chris Ryan
Unforgiven.
Bill Simmons
You're just like, yeah, I'm just, I'm a blind guy killed in the silent saloon. I'm like, what's going on? Is that Will Penny?
Chris Ryan
Oh, that's just drunk, Billy. He can't see.
Bill Simmons
I'm just drunk and blind. This episode is brought to you by Amazon Prime. Here's the thing about prime. Whatever you're into, it makes it even better. I love because we watch a lot of prime movies for the rewatchables. I love being able to pop up the X ray thing. That tells you, what actor is in what scene. I love that. I love being able to rent movies that just came out or buy them. If I'm excited to do that. From streaming to shopping, it's on Prime. Visit Amazon.comprime to get more out of whatever you're into. This episode is brought to you by Viori. I love sports. I know you do too. I also know that lots of you exercise. But if you're like me and my wife, the beloved sports gal, you're sick and tired of ugly, uncomfortable workout gear especially. You know, I do a lot of walking. I walk around la. I make calls, I listen to podcasts. Here are two words that will change everything. Viori clothing. A line of activewear that is unbelievable. The best thing about Viori is you can lounge around in it, you can work out in it, you can go outside, you can go shopping down in your local wherever, and you never feel like you're either underdressed or overdressed. You're just comfortable. You can wear it when you're training, traveling, lounging around the house, go get yourself some of the most comfortable and versatile clothing on the planet. Here's the deal. Our listeners get 20% off their first purchase at vuori.comsimmons Once again, v u O-R-I.comsimmons Theme month suggestion from Josh Lento. This goes to what we talked about earlier. A different host selects the movie of their choice. Co host each week could be a specific selection of one of the rotating hosts. Other than Mr. Bill Simmons, Bill has no veto power during this month. I was thinking the theme could be referred to as Much to Bill Chagrin.
Craig Horbect
Yeah, I think this is a great idea.
Chris Ryan
What do you do if on Much to Bill Chagrin month we put up like insane numbers because we do Lord of the Rings.
Craig Horbect
Lord of the Rings, one, two and every Captain America.
Bill Simmons
I do like this idea.
Chris Ryan
Should you be on these Much to Bill?
Bill Simmons
Sh.
Craig Horbect
Yeah, I have to be.
Bill Simmons
I'm just hosting, playing point guard. But.
Chris Ryan
But would you be like Julius Randall and like ruining the vibe and not.
Bill Simmons
Ever do the Julie?
Craig Horbect
I think. I don't think you should host if you haven't seen it though. Right? Somebody else has to host.
Bill Simmons
I'd have to watch it.
Craig Horbect
Right. But then it should be still Chris hosting Lord.
Bill Simmons
Good idea.
Chris Ryan
Right?
Bill Simmons
Yeah. So. So if it's Chris or Sean.
Chris Ryan
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Bill Simmons
That's, that's.
Craig Horbect
It's still the three of you, but just they're hosting.
Bill Simmons
But if Van wanted to do Van. So you basically you. If it's your movie you have to host the pod.
Chris Ryan
Yeah, but there's some. There's a lot of thought that goes into this because you want to pick one that he would never pick.
Craig Horbect
Right.
Chris Ryan
But that he would still like, be a good sport, watch and be into.
Craig Horbect
Or you could make him watch. But there are a bunch of things.
Chris Ryan
That I know you want to do, but you're like pacing yourself for. Right?
Bill Simmons
Yeah, but it would be. I mean, tune. What was the Twin.
Craig Horbect
Twin Towers.
Bill Simmons
Twin Towers. That one.
Chris Ryan
The two.
Bill Simmons
Two Towers.
Craig Horbect
I haven't seen it either.
Bill Simmons
Would I have to see the first one before the second one? Like, how prepped am I?
Craig Horbect
Yeah, I wasn't. Right.
Chris Ryan
Yeah, you should probably.
Bill Simmons
Maybe it's like no sequels.
Chris Ryan
Yeah, yeah, that's good. No sequels.
Bill Simmons
So you do like some sort of UK crime thing.
Craig Horbect
That'd be great if you fan. Just chose the three Lord of the Rings movies in a row.
Chris Ryan
Yeah, I mean, I. I would probably pick something like. I would probably pick something like Hot Fuzz or Ex Machina or something like that. Like they're not that. That far out.
Bill Simmons
So I'm just on the pod. I'm like the fourth. Fourth co host and occasionally I have a couple points.
Chris Ryan
Right. But the point is, most of the.
Bill Simmons
Time I'm just like, oh, man, this fucking crime drama in the uk, that's like.
Craig Horbect
When you invite me on to do. I think I came on with you guys to do a live. Right. Didn't I do that movie with you guys? Yeah, yeah, it'll be like that. I hadn't seen it before.
Bill Simmons
That movie changed your life.
Craig Horbect
It did. Altruistic cannibalism.
Bill Simmons
Another theme month idea from Mitchell Moore, who says thank you for the rewatchables and all the laughs and insights you provide each week. We really appreciate all the emails. By the way. My suggestion for a new category is Unwatchables Month. A group of movies you've mentioned multiple times that you know don't work but you can't help watching. The list is as follows. Bugsy, Indian summer, another 48 hours, Angel Heart. I really resented that he didn't think Angel Heart. I gotta say, Angel Heart works great. Yeah, I'd like. I don't love Bugsy, but I do. I don't think it's. It's. It's basically the flawed rewatchables concept.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Craig Horbect
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
But I think we should probably bring that back in 2020.
Craig Horbect
I think we need to do the canceled Rewatchables month.
Chris Ryan
That's the.
Bill Simmons
That have.
Chris Ryan
That Such a good idea.
Bill Simmons
Yeah. Another theme month Idea from Amy Fleischer. She's calling it Shit Goes Sideways Very Quickly. Adventures in Babysitting. Empire Records. Go. Don't tell mom the babysitter's dead. I'm throwing in long kiss Goodnight. Is like this too. But that. That's Shit Goes Sideways.
Chris Ryan
I would also throw after hours in there.
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Decent idea. So this is from Logan in Hawaii. He says Aloha rewatchables. His category ideas. How would Van Lathan get out of this one? It was a great impromptu moment during Den of Thieves, the Reden of Thieves, when Chris Ryan asked Van Lathan how he'd excuse himself out of an accidental text. Mr. Lathan Jr's response was very entertaining. Would be a graded great addition should opportunity allow in a given rewatch. I like that.
Chris Ryan
Yeah. Like, how would you get out of. If you were Karen Hill, how would you get out of flushing all the cocaine when Henry comes home from jail?
Bill Simmons
Right.
Chris Ryan
Just like that was all the money we had. Would you. You know, it's like, I don't want to live in a world where we have to sell cocaine just to make ends meet, you know?
Bill Simmons
Yeah. What was the right move for her there?
Chris Ryan
Probably just to be like, what do you want? The cops were searching the house. Did you want to go away for like, federal drug possession?
Craig Horbect
The move is she should probably just leave.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
How good would you be at flushing cocaine down the toilet?
Craig Horbect
What is the best way to dispose of it?
Chris Ryan
Like to disappoint?
Bill Simmons
They always shake it and then the cocaine just gets everywhere. You really got to like. It's more about how you open the.
Chris Ryan
Bag and no one's ever flushing cocaine down the toilet in a patient way. You know, like, it's usually if you're flushing it down the toilet, I think you have.
Craig Horbect
You have seconds.
Chris Ryan
I think the day is outside with the toilet.
Bill Simmons
Really flush that well, with all the cocaine.
Craig Horbect
Where else are you going, though? You can't go sink or shower.
Chris Ryan
This is a great YouTube series. Is Chris and Bill try. Try things that they've seen in movies?
Bill Simmons
Well, I worry when I, like, put gum in the toilet, I'm like, is that thing in a flush? But like two kilos of cocaine just in ten flushes feels like. I don't know.
Chris Ryan
Greg, why don't you go get us.
Bill Simmons
A kilo, get us some fake. I need 24 hours question from Jurgen Anderson, two S's. Hi, have a question for you. Who is Diane Waiters?
Chris Ryan
Do you think Jurgen's from the States?
Craig Horbect
I don't.
Bill Simmons
I do not.
Chris Ryan
Okay.
Bill Simmons
This Got me thinking though. We should probably explain who Dion Waiters is.
Craig Horbect
Did he say Diane?
Bill Simmons
Yeah, yeah, he said Diane Waiters.
Craig Horbect
That's fair.
Bill Simmons
Because Dion Waiters now has not played for how many years we've discussed replacing.
Craig Horbect
The name Dion Waiters with a different player.
Bill Simmons
Right.
Chris Ryan
Yeah. I mean, I think that Dion specifically works for the movies that we love to talk about. And it's a celebration. I was thinking that there is like a Sam Darnold award that we could give out to somebody who has like an incredible three quarters of a movie.
Bill Simmons
Oh, and then just vanishes.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Craig Horbect
Or it's like they're only good in this movie. Like Michael Madsen and Tarantino films or something.
Chris Ryan
Yeah, that's good.
Bill Simmons
I'm only good in this system. Like system C system system.
Craig Horbect
Roles.
Chris Ryan
It's like people who are only good in Sorkin or only good in Paul Thomas Anderson movies or whatever. Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Like John Michael Higgins in the Christopher Guest movies. The. The Sam Donald award is really interesting. Is that for the movie or it.
Chris Ryan
Could also be for their career.
Craig Horbect
I think it's character who only works in this movie or actor who only works in this movie, or Sam Donald's a different one.
Bill Simmons
That's like you. You were doing good for a while and then it. The wheels came off.
Craig Horbect
Unless you just want to treat it as. He was great with Kevin O'Connell in this system.
Chris Ryan
And then we would have to do the Kevin O'Connell press conference afterwards where he's just like, I just wish him the best on his journey.
Bill Simmons
Anyway, DM Waiters, he played 418 NBA games. He was a lottery pick for Cleveland. He was 2013 draft. I think it was the fourth or fifth.
Craig Horbect
Did he come out of high school?
Bill Simmons
No, he. Yeah, he was at Syracuse. He peaked at 15.9 a game on a crappy 2014 Cavs team before LeBron came back. Bounced around, went to OKC, Miami, finished with the Lakers. But the reason. The reason we really, we. We named the heat check after him was because sometimes he would just come in and make everything.
Chris Ryan
The microwave.
Bill Simmons
He'd come in in like three minutes. He would have 10 points. So the idea of Dion Waiters was better than Dion Waiters because most of the time he would come in and, you know, miss a couple threes, but then every once in a while, Deon Waiters heat check would happen. So I guess the question is, do we dump Deon Waiters for a more modern heat check guy?
Chris Ryan
Do you feel like there is a. A comparable modern equivalent to Dion? I feel like this guy's gotten a little bit legislated out of the game.
Bill Simmons
The Dion waiters, he checked the Lou Williams.
Chris Ryan
I came in and I dropped 21 in 18 minutes, but I can't play defense. And, you know, I mean, the.
Bill Simmons
The. So Cam Thomas is one, but I don't know what his shelf life's going to be. Peyton Pritchard's a good one these days because Peyton Pritchard's either 3 points or 28.
Chris Ryan
I was legitimately like, who's Payton Pritchard for a second.
Bill Simmons
Seconds. I don't know. The Dion, though, it feels like we're kind of stuck with it.
Craig Horbect
It's such a staple of the show.
Chris Ryan
It's also. It's. He's. He's a. An icon of our pod.
Craig Horbect
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
All right.
Chris Ryan
I think I agree, but we can add Sam Darnold just to mix it up.
Craig Horbect
I do like the. The system System actor idea.
Bill Simmons
Here's a heat question from Harley. I don't know if Harley's last name or first name. How many houses does Neil McAuley have and where are they? So he writes down, the house with no furniture where Chris sleeps is clearly modern, sleek, and by the water, maybe Malibu.
Chris Ryan
Yeah, it's Malibu Colony.
Bill Simmons
When he meets Edie at the cafe, he says he lives up here, so maybe that's Hollywood Hills. They go to the house, stand on the balcony, great view. Seems too expensive to be a rental. Also well furnished. Then he leaves her that morning. So was he leaving her alone at his house? Was that her rental or his? Chris Ryan, I. I gave you a heads up on this question. So what's. What's the real estate?
Chris Ryan
Neil lives in Malibu. He lives in. On the. On the beach. When he says, I live up here, he's joking because she goes, that's really funny. I think he's alluding to the idea that he lives upstairs from the restaurant. Ah. There's a couple of times where he says things to Edie that are, like, probably purposely to, like, lead her astray if she was ever questioned by the police. Like, he. I think he says he's from the bay. You know, stuff like that. That he did time in the bay, but he's not from there. And so I think that the house that they sleep in that first night is a rental. And a, it's movie magic. So, like, obviously, people's houses are usually nicer in the movies and TV. And B, it was the 90s, so maybe Edie could get, like, a decent place in the hills.
Bill Simmons
Right.
Chris Ryan
That had a Good view. So that's Edie's place that he leaves her at.
Bill Simmons
So what part of the hills do we think that's in?
Chris Ryan
I, like, thought maybe Beechwood.
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Chris Ryan
Or like, kind of like that area.
Bill Simmons
Like a. And then where do we think? The guy who fucks them over and then he shoots him through the TV when he's watching a hockey game. What's that guy's name?
Craig Horbect
Oh, yeah.
Bill Simmons
Van Zant.
Chris Ryan
Yeah, Van Zant.
Bill Simmons
Where was his house? Because he's climbing up a canyon on that one. That had three. So we only think one house for Neil. Probably renting. Probably rents here.
Craig Horbect
Maybe an apartment in the South Bay. Kind of get away.
Chris Ryan
I could see him having a safe house like a. Like a Torrance. Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Think he has a burner room? Like Rahim?
Craig Horbect
Definitely.
Chris Ryan
What's the burner room?
Bill Simmons
Raheem has burner. He talks about in Vegas. He has a burner room, this hotel room, and then a burner room.
Craig Horbect
I don't know what that means. What is a burner room?
Bill Simmons
It's a second room.
Chris Ryan
For what?
Bill Simmons
Whatever you need. Do you want to take somebody?
Craig Horbect
My apartment has three burner rooms. That I guess.
Bill Simmons
Burner room. He didn't elaborate.
Chris Ryan
Oh, man.
Bill Simmons
They say Joe House has been talking about it ever since. New category from Matt Hennessy. This is wonderful. In honor of Alec Baldwin's captain, George Elbry from the Departed. It's the Two Weeks With Pay award for the movie character who should have been fired from their job.
Chris Ryan
This is the Vincent Chase Award, right?
Craig Horbect
Yeah.
Chris Ryan
Are we sure this character is good at their job?
Bill Simmons
Yeah. So we'd have to lose Vincent Chase for this.
Chris Ryan
I think we could put George Ellerby in for Vincent Chase. Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Is it time? Vincent Chase, 20 year anniversary.
Craig Horbect
I don't know. Entourage is coming to Netflix. I feel it. We might have to keep it around.
Bill Simmons
He had examples. The mayor from Jaws, the Italian detective team, and the talented Mr. Ripley. And all the employers, employees of Empire Records.
Chris Ryan
Empire Records coming up. A lot in this mailbag.
Bill Simmons
A lot of people like Empire Records. 30th anniversary coming up might be on the schedule. A theme month from Jen Ducks, who says she's a longtime listener and loves the podcast. She had a quick category idea. Best FanDuel line odds as we're doing something. Yeah, I guess it would be. What were the FanDuel live odds for? You know.
Chris Ryan
Oh, yeah. What are the odds that Neil is.
Bill Simmons
About to kill Wayne Grove. Yeah.
Chris Ryan
That he just stays in the car.
Bill Simmons
Just to use Heat as the prism for all these possible Categories Best fandom Odds. How long does Chris stay together with Ashley?
Chris Ryan
What were the odds Charlene was just going to let Chris enjoy this night?
Bill Simmons
Right, Right. Anyway, he asks, when is Philly month? Or she asked, when is Philly month going to happen? You've teased some Philly movies. Silver Linings Playbook last year was great. I think there's plenty of meat.
Craig Horbect
What's on. What's on the Philly Mount Rushmore that hasn't been done yet.
Chris Ryan
Well, we've done a bunch Suggested Witness, which I think is in. It's being scouted at close range is Lancaster, but it's still an awesome movie. And then after that, we pretty much just have 12 monkeys left.
Bill Simmons
So we did Philadelphia, we did Trading Places, we did Blow up, which I think were three of. And then Silver Lining. So we've. We've done some already.
Craig Horbect
And Rocky.
Bill Simmons
Well, we haven't done Rocky one and we haven't done Rocky two.
Craig Horbect
Oh, yeah. Only three and four.
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Craig Horbect
Keeping people guessing.
Chris Ryan
Yeah. We did Creed.
Craig Horbect
Yep. Did Creed Live.
Bill Simmons
There's probably a couple others we forgot. What was that vigilante movie with Tom Skerritt fighting back? That was in Philly. What's it. Yeah, Tubi. Greedy. A Tubi. Fun idea from Andrew Rowan. Two A's. I think a good category to add when you're doing a crime heist cop movie is where does the inevitable Are you a cop Scene Rank.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Compared to Den of Thieves, Departed, Fast and Furious in general. I think the next time we do one of these movies, we really have to. They need a bunch of special categories.
Chris Ryan
It would be fun to apply this to like Grand Budapest Hotel, though. Oh, you a co.
Bill Simmons
I was thinking of the heist movie staples. They're on to us.
Craig Horbect
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Are you a cop? Nobody's ever broken in this bank before.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
We're here for the bank's money, not yours. And I need to know right now, are you in also? Five things that have to be in every.
Chris Ryan
I do this job and then I'm out.
Craig Horbect
Yeah, One last job for sure.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
One last job. Yeah. Still feel like we can write one of these. Reader idea from Ryan McCabe. Rewatchables is the best podcast available. He praises us for a little bit here. One of the categories that needs to be improved is the CR Thinks Luke Wilson Hottest take. You have great ideas, but as a longtime Simmons fan. Thank you. And supporter of mailbags, they've consistently taught me that your fans have the craziest and best hottest takes. That's legitimately how every Great. Mailbag was built in the old days. He's correct.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
The emails were great. Tie this to the old fans. Call it the mailbag. Hottest take. Solicit hot takes from readers and present those for commentary. Y'all do a fine job, but I know readers and listeners would kill this. I'm not against this.
Craig Horbect
There's only what you do have to release the movie.
Bill Simmons
This really we can advance.
Chris Ryan
Comes down to one man.
Craig Horbect
Yeah.
Chris Ryan
Well, one thing we could do.
Bill Simmons
I don't think you could leak the movie ahead of time because then we're getting all these ideas that would fuck up the podcast.
Chris Ryan
So one thing we could do on the next show, they could also send.
Bill Simmons
Them to me next show as a.
Chris Ryan
Special, like, Wednesday YouTube thing. We could read out the reader Luke Wilson hottest maybe that's what we do.
Bill Simmons
I like the idea of hot takes from readers about movies we've done. I think is a good idea.
Craig Horbect
Yeah.
Chris Ryan
You don't want anybody getting in your airspace when you're thinking about.
Craig Horbect
Well, you could have them email me and I could go through them.
Bill Simmons
I'm always, like, really hesitant of, like, going on. Like, if there's like a 500 posts, read it. Read about the movie. I want to, like, come up with my own ideas on the movie. And I always feel like that screws me up.
Chris Ryan
Like, that was unrated.
Bill Simmons
It's like, fuck. From James Rowe. He's a Day 1 Rewatchables fan. His. His trilogy, Holy trinity is Godfather, Armageddon, the Town. I have an idea that while I don't think it works as a rewatchables category, is perfect for a bill and CR segment. A fantasy draft between bill and CR of hype moves heist movie crew members to build your own crew for heist five round draft. Snake Order one crew leader, best friend, road dog two role players. Fifth pick is the first to die.
Craig Horbect
Did you prep this?
Bill Simmons
Well, we decided we.
Chris Ryan
We would instead of doing a draft challenge ourselves.
Bill Simmons
Yeah. We're going to try to come up with a heist crew together. So the ringleader has to be Neil McCauley. Right.
Craig Horbect
He's all time number one.
Chris Ryan
Are we just doing Michael Mann movies or is this from.
Bill Simmons
I think we do anything. I think we do everything.
Chris Ryan
Okay.
Craig Horbect
McAuley's number one.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Craig Horbect
He's the signal caller. Okay.
Chris Ryan
Which is funny because he honestly does not live through his heist ultimately, you know, so it's like he is 0 and 1 as far as there is Doug McCrag case. Who would you rather take orders from?
Bill Simmons
Neil McCauley. Yeah, I feel like he knows his shit. I think you need somebody who's less about the violence and more about the smarts.
Chris Ryan
Let's make a rule that you can only draft one guy from a movie.
Bill Simmons
Or all the guys from one movie.
Chris Ryan
Okay, then who's the size for?
Bill Simmons
Well, who's the number two guy? I think is. Has to be Jem. Right.
Chris Ryan
Who's your road dog? Is definitely Jim.
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Craig Horbect
Who's Coyote?
Bill Simmons
So now we have a movie with Neil McCall.
Chris Ryan
I will make an argument. Road dog could be Rust from the oceans movies. Really, really good roads.
Bill Simmons
A good one.
Chris Ryan
Wow. Maybe even more fun than Jim. Jim gets you in a lot of fights. Jim gets you in a lot of trouble.
Bill Simmons
What do we do about like, can Merriman not be the lead guy but also be in the crew anyway?
Chris Ryan
Well, in truth, not spoiled Den of Thieves. He's not really the lead guy in Den of Thieves. It just gets revealed at the end that that was always Donnie.
Bill Simmons
Right? True.
Chris Ryan
So yeah, Merriman could be third.
Bill Simmons
All right, so so far we have Neil McCauley and Jim. You want to throw Ocean's Eleven in there too?
Chris Ryan
Yeah, let's do. Let's do Rust and Merriman for 3 and 4.
Bill Simmons
I really need Sizemore in here from Heat.
Craig Horbect
Kind of a wild card.
Bill Simmons
I just need him. What was his name in the movie? I'm blanking. Chris. No, not sure. Her list. That wasn't. Whatever his name was.
Chris Ryan
It was Chorito.
Bill Simmons
Chirito.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Who blew it all by just calling one guy Slick when everybody had just been blown up. But somehow. Remember that little detail?
Chris Ryan
Yeah, you get the phone book.
Bill Simmons
Do it anyway because he needs. He needs to be in this so he can have his. His one big scene. I need a one big scene for my number four guy. I need some size of them.
Chris Ryan
Okay, so let's lose Merriman for Chirito then.
Bill Simmons
Yeah. I don't know how Merriman and Chorito would interact. Feels like there'd be some alpha dog stuff with them. Yeah, little Russell Wilson, Justin Fields. It's like whose corner is Rust?
Craig Horbect
Is good. Cuz he'll keep everybody calm. He's kind of in a non violence.
Chris Ryan
Eating nachos in the back and kind of hanging out.
Craig Horbect
Great suit.
Bill Simmons
Do we need? Is there a wise cracking guy for like the four spot?
Chris Ryan
Yeah, I was thinking maybe Bumi from Reservoir Dogs.
Bill Simmons
Oh, that's good.
Craig Horbect
Yeah, that is good.
Chris Ryan
Just bring a little firecracker energy.
Bill Simmons
Yeah. Guys, I think that's what some of these movies miss is the one funny I was trying to make this case with Dennis, but somebody who's keeping a light and then the driver is who?
Chris Ryan
Gosling from Drive.
Bill Simmons
That's pretty good.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Craig Horbect
Baby Driver. Ansel Elgart.
Chris Ryan
I'm gonna go Gosling. Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Can we take cops and put them in the heist? Sure.
Chris Ryan
You want them to be on the wrong side of the law or you just want them? I really. The thieves.
Bill Simmons
I don't know if you've seen this movie, but it's Miami Vice. It came out in 2006.
Chris Ryan
I have.
Bill Simmons
I really like Jamie Foxx's performance in that movie and have been good guy or bad guy. The way he plays it, I almost feel like he could have just been the driver. Like the Hayr character.
Chris Ryan
Yeah. Do, do we have any room for Gong Lee, for Isabella to to be.
Bill Simmons
In here from my, like the love interest of the. So who's like your number one heist love interest? Gongly is basically just saying over and over again that there wasn't enough time times luck.
Chris Ryan
I gotta be honest.
Craig Horbect
Lively.
Chris Ryan
I gotta say lively.
Bill Simmons
Yeah. Now we're talking.
Chris Ryan
If I'm being completely real, it's like, who's lively?
Bill Simmons
Dating out of the crew.
Chris Ryan
We just, well, that's the fun part is that she, maybe she's like got something with one of the guys, but Neil's always loved her and she gets eyes on rust. Yeah.
Craig Horbect
And it's over.
Bill Simmons
All right, we'll keep workshopping this. I, I, the important thing is that Neil has to wait.
Chris Ryan
Did we pick a first guy to die?
Bill Simmons
Oh, that's a good one. Yeah.
Chris Ryan
We get Belushi from Thief. Always had that, that energy, you know, it's big doofus.
Bill Simmons
There's no way this guy's making it to the 50 minute mark of the movie. Yeah, well, the guy in the town, the guy who gets his head shot off. Oh, yeah, when he's driving. The tattoo guy. But he lasted, I guess, till the end. Theme months from Josh Bro. Comeback Month. Much needed hits that brought a star back on the conversation. Like the Wrestler. The night of Professor Underrated Month. The other guys, great white hype Outside Providence. Pop star Comedy classics. That's easy. In honor of SNL's 50th. Maybe do something for that. That might be on the agenda. And then Oscar movies I thought was interesting.
Chris Ryan
Yeah, Best Pictures, Best Picture winners. Best Picture winner months. Yeah, Best Picture. Yeah. Best Picture winner.
Bill Simmons
Because when else are we doing like network or One Floor over the Cuckoo's Nest Movies like that?
Chris Ryan
I would do network, network, whenever.
Bill Simmons
But in Terms of Endearment for that one.
Chris Ryan
Out of Africa.
Bill Simmons
New category from Eric Ritvo. This is great. This is going right in the Don Dawson. The Don Dawson Sasha Jenkins award from Dazed and Confused for the actor in the film that you cannot believe didn't become a bigger star.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
So you would have Dana Nicholas, Dana Willer, Nicholson, Fletch. Yeah. Be your number one. Might be Lisa El Becker.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Craig Horbect
Wow, that's a good one.
Bill Simmons
But I like, I like naming a category after Don Dawson. It could also be the who's the guy in Swingers who we never saw again?
Craig Horbect
Oh yeah. The third guy, Sue.
Chris Ryan
Oh yeah. Not Ron Livingston, but the other guy is Sue. Yeah.
Bill Simmons
And he was just never in another movie. It's like what happened to that guy? I do like capturing it feels like a cousin of the that guy. Like why weren't you more of a thing.
Chris Ryan
Yeah. It's link later movies are really good for that.
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Chris Ryan
Because he's so good at casting. But then those people are not always like super professional.
Bill Simmons
I think we add that to the hodgepodge.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Where somebody could agree to do that. A plea from Felix K. It's come to this. I'm a 50 year old man emailing a podcast to request a movie that should have been done a long time ago. Sorry. Scarface. What am I missing? Seems like a no brainer.
Chris Ryan
This is not my fault. You can say Hunt for Octavia.
Bill Simmons
Some that are just, you know, on ice in the, in the refrigerator waiting to be done. It's.
Chris Ryan
We're doing Scarface that we've done say in 2024 that you were like, I wish we had done that earlier to.
Bill Simmons
Open the door for doing it yet again.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Later we probably should done Pulp earlier.
Chris Ryan
You let it build up in your head.
Craig Horbect
I also think there are so many movies that you guys did in like 2017, 18 that were so good. You came out so hot for the first 1520 movies. They were just banger after banger after banger.
Bill Simmons
The.
Craig Horbect
No, but a lot of those you didn't have the categories for those. You could bring all those back.
Bill Simmons
Yeah, yeah. There's some good ones like Point Break and Speed and new category from Josh Ramshaw the Kyle Brand award for Is this movie better as a monocum Golan production. Really solid. Probably categories. But a great joke.
Craig Horbect
Yeah.
Chris Ryan
I would like to add that that I would love to do the 80s action trailer voice for movies that would like what would be the most inappropriate use of 80s action trailer voice on like.
Bill Simmons
Like we're doing Philadelphia.
Chris Ryan
Like Remains of a day. He's just a butler.
Craig Horbect
But what if like Manchester by the Sea.
Bill Simmons
Yeah, that's good.
Chris Ryan
He's lost everything, but he gained it all back.
Bill Simmons
Maybe that should be added to the director's commentary of the sports announcers. Like 80 Action Voice be the from Eric Hoover. This isn't a suggestion, it's more a fact. But I thought it was interesting. After listening to the Friday Night Lights episode, I would love to submit a nominee to dethrone the undisclosed truck stop coin toss. He's a lifelong racing fan. He says the 1969 coin toss between Ogden Phipps Claiborne Claiborne Farms owner, horse racing royalty and Penny Chenery was the most important in sports history. And what happened was the 1969. I'll skim it through. But the 1969 breeding season, this horse called Cicada did not conceive. Cicada. Cicada.
Chris Ryan
Cicada. Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Cicada. Do you know this story?
Chris Ryan
No, I know Cicadas. The insect.
Bill Simmons
Only one foal was due in the spring of 1970. The winner of the coin toss would receive one foal, the first choice in 69. The loser would get second choice in 69. The lone foal of 1970, Ogden Phipps, wins the toss.
Craig Horbect
This is how we'll decide who gets to pick the movie. The the other people have to watch. We'll do a coin toss live on camera.
Bill Simmons
Ogden Phipps wins the toss, gets something royal. 1969. Chenery gets the second choice in 69 in the 1974 Secretariat. And he says, imagine losing a coin toss and ending up with Tom Brady, Michael Jordan, Babe Ruth and Secretariat. That's. That's got to be the best coin toss. I always thought it was Neil Walker, Kareem Abdul jabbar in the 1969 NBA Draft. But no new category from Pat in Wisconsin. Best application to a high school lesson plan. And he says, for years, my colleagues, former colleagues and I have utilized movie clips or entire movies into our instruction as social studies teachers. Examples. US History. There Will Be Blood. US Oil Boom. Argo. Iranian Hostage Crisis. Crisis. Pulp Fiction. Jewels and the Robbers and Diners. A metaphor for us And German tensions following the Zimmerman note. Is that true?
Chris Ryan
I don't know, but it just seems like this guy wanted to show Pulp Fiction to his class.
Bill Simmons
Crime and Justice. Catch me if you can. White Collar Crime Psychology. Rain Man. What about Bob Memento? Mean Girls? The Strawberry Daiquiri Scene. Philosophy. Groundhog Day. I don't think this works as a category, but I really appreciate the spirit behind it.
Craig Horbect
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Using movies to connect with high school kids who don't want to be in your class and are probably on their phone.
Chris Ryan
That's right. I used to have a 8th grade history teacher who would show like, movies from different historical eras than the ones that we were studying. And it was clear that he just needed a class off. He'd be like, we're doing the colonial American Revolution. Let's watch Spartacus.
Craig Horbect
Yeah. Throw on the rewatchables for the students.
Bill Simmons
You know, this is the best idea of all the ideas and sadly, we probably won't be able to do it. It's a new category idea from Colin W. A few years ago, I was jokingly brought up to have a category where you call Rosillo and ask what he thinks of the film being discussed.
Craig Horbect
Just live on air.
Bill Simmons
I feel like we as listeners have missed out on more than a few gem tags from RR by this having been implemented in the podcast. This would be an incredible category. Does Resila like this movie? What's Rossillo's take? Calling Rossillo unprompted and unannounced. If he doesn't answer, he doesn't answer.
Craig Horbect
I gotta.
Chris Ryan
I don't know why we don't do this.
Craig Horbect
This is my favorite, by far the best idea.
Bill Simmons
So we just put him on speaker and just call. And if he answers and he answers, I'm like, hey, Friday Night Lights, what are your thoughts?
Chris Ryan
Does Rossillo have the highest batting average on the. On the rewatchables in terms of like, appearances to the amount of.
Bill Simmons
Yeah. It's almost like we don't want to book them anymore.
Craig Horbect
Right.
Bill Simmons
It's. It's.
Craig Horbect
He's Town, Vision Quest, Wolf of Wall Street. Is that it?
Bill Simmons
Deliverance.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Oh, Margin Call. I think he's done like five or six. Deliverance. That was his choice. I like this Rossillo idea, though. We might have to try.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Craig Horbect
So good right now it's picking up.
Bill Simmons
So if we do before sunrise later this month, call and he'll just. We just call me. It's like, ah, Ethan Hawke. Fuck. Movie sucked. New category.
Chris Ryan
I thought Jesse could have done better than her man.
Bill Simmons
I really like this next idea too. New category idea from Thomas P. Is this movie perfect in that? Does it accomplish its stated goal? For example, Dazed and Confused attempts to capture the beginning of summer in 1976 in a small town. Can you imagine a better version included in the soundtrack? Does the actor playing Mitch take it from perfect to almost perfect? The answer is yes. Other perfect movie candidates stand by me. Devil Wears Prada, Die Hard. Not necessarily the best movie ever, but movies that perfectly achieved their goal.
Chris Ryan
Love this movie. I love this idea.
Bill Simmons
It's a great idea. And my wife.
Craig Horbect
It's a better way to rate movies.
Bill Simmons
Yeah. My wife had Devil Wears Prada on, which we've watched a bunch of. It's one of the most rewatchable movies the last 20 years, I think. And I was watching, I was like, this is like no hitter of a movie for whatever it was trying to do. Yeah. I wouldn't change a single thing. The plot makes sense. Even Adrian Grenier is the boyfriend. Is hilarious because he's so bad.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
So I like the idea of did this movie achieve.
Chris Ryan
It's also cool, like movies that are like B plus, B minus movies generally. But, like, for what it was doing.
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Chris Ryan
You can't. You couldn't have improved it, really.
Craig Horbect
No. Like, the sandlot is a 10 out of 10. It was. It did exactly what it needed to do.
Bill Simmons
So do you think this is. Where would we put this in the. In the episode? You do it near the end, right? Yeah.
Chris Ryan
Yeah. Who won the movie and is.
Bill Simmons
Or right before who won the movie? Yeah, I like that one. Top of the pot idea from Katie Mount. This is another good one. I would love it if you all added a food and drink recommendation to accompany the film we're supposed to be rewatching. My husband and I plan our weeks around rewatching and listening to your podcast. That's nice. So it immensely helped my meal planning. I already have a steak on a paper plate planned for rewatching Den of Thieves, but still decided between a box of wine or champagne of beer to go with it.
Chris Ryan
Oh, man. I would go.
Bill Simmons
That's an interesting one.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
So what's the. What's heat? We got to go back to heat. So what's the food and drink for?
Chris Ryan
Heat the chicken. Because remember, he's like, I'm sorry if the chicken got overcooked.
Craig Horbect
Overcooked.
Chris Ryan
So overcooked rotisserie chicken for heat.
Craig Horbect
So you're just picking an item from the movie, or is it whatever you feel like is the perfect.
Bill Simmons
I took it as, like, the mood for the movie.
Chris Ryan
Yeah, because that's interesting because I feel for, like, for instance, for Blair Witch, you would do basically, like gas station snack banquet, like jerky, Doritos, you know, Dr. Pepper, everything that they get out of the gas stations, which you would eat during that. You feel like afterwards, though.
Bill Simmons
I think the problem with this category, which I really liked, is it's really up to the person.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
They know what the movie is. Take it from there.
Chris Ryan
60 of them are also. Should I be smoking during this?
Bill Simmons
This. This never got quite got here. But Luke B thought we should do a Brad Stevens award for the best basketball lineup you could possibly make for the movie.
Craig Horbect
Oh, that's fun.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Guys. You slap five characters into roles positions in a starting lineup, he said. For instance, Neil's crew from Heat. Neil's the point guard. He's a Chris Paul type. Chris is the gunslinging shooting guard. Trey as the bruising meta world peace. Corey McGetty type. And Sizemore is a Horace Grant sergebaka. David west traditional Swiss army knife power forward.
Chris Ryan
I like that this dude stopped watching basketball in 2011. You know, just like a Bacon West.
Bill Simmons
He's like a Lou all day.
Chris Ryan
Trending topics today.
Bill Simmons
Courtney McGetty in there it this is a good one for Move an ensemble movie.
Craig Horbect
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Put together a basketball team. So like Friday Night Lights we just did.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
So Riggins was what? Riggins is like. He's like a banger. He's like a rebounder.
Chris Ryan
He's like a. Under stress.
Bill Simmons
Yeah. Saracen's like under like a 5:9 point guard. He's like a Jose Alvarado.
Craig Horbect
Booby Miles shooting guard.
Bill Simmons
Booby Miles is like the Kobe. He goes down category tweak from John Wolf. This is great. A cousin of the Mallet Rubin. Did this movie need a better sex scene? I thought of this during the redone of Thieves pod. Didn't we need a scene where Pablo 50 and crew play a pickup basketball game against Butler and the sheriffs? Then he asked, didn't Shot Collar need a better sports scene? We get no prison ball. Couldn't Goodfellas have fit in a softball scene? Like they're playing for the deli team, basically. How would you have shoehorned a sports move a sports scene into this movie for no reason? The best version of this is American History X when we have the Helter Skelter pickup basketball game.
Chris Ryan
I was watching Maverick again the other day and the football scene with two footballs is just like in the movie theater. You're like, what are they doing? Even though it's basically the volleyball scene for the first one.
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Chris Ryan
It's so awesome. Yeah, it's like. It's just such a chill hangout.
Bill Simmons
I think we keep this in our back pocket.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Craig Horbect
I think you could work this into every movie. How can we shoehorn a sports scene into this and you guys have to come up with one I think it's great.
Bill Simmons
So before sunrise, Little five. Soccer.
Craig Horbect
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
He's. He all of a sudden is.
Craig Horbect
Yeah. I mean, looking at these movies like Body Double. What? What is he, like, going to play racquetball one day?
Bill Simmons
You gotta do something good one instead of acting class. It's claustrophobic.
Chris Ryan
It's too much, too tight in there.
Bill Simmons
I like. We should test drive that one. That's a good idea.
Craig Horbect
Work, I think. What are they playing in Hereditary?
Bill Simmons
Oh, man. What would they be in Hereditary?
Craig Horbect
And you have to kind of make it work.
Bill Simmons
That's a school football game where they go and something scary happens.
Chris Ryan
But I would just love it if Tony Colette was just like, well, why don't we settle this out on the court? Just like dunking on her son.
Bill Simmons
Well, great. Santini had all those great basketball scenes in that. You've never seen that one. What's the best time of day to get a deal? All day with Jack in the box's all day.
Chris Ryan
Big deal.
Bill Simmons
Meal.
Chris Ryan
You get to choose from four entrees like the supreme croissant and five tasty.
Bill Simmons
Sides, plus a drink starting at $5.
Chris Ryan
So hurry in or take your time. You've got all day at Jack. Every bite's a big deal.
Bill Simmons
This episode is brought to you by Amazon. Sometimes the most painful part of getting sick is the getting better part. Waiting on hold for an appointment or sitting in crowded waiting rooms, standing in line at the pharmacy. That's painful. Amazon One Medical and Amazon Pharmacy remove those painful parts of getting better with things like 24. 7 virtual visits and prescriptions delivered to your door thanks to Amazon Pharmacy and Amazon One Medical Healthcare just got less painful. A slew of category suggestions from Yale Reardon.
Chris Ryan
These are really good.
Bill Simmons
He wants us to add the Jason Tatum he's only 19. Breakout star award. Yeah, Someone who obviously jumps off the screen. That doesn't happen enough. The Nick Saban Offensive Coordinator Referral Award. An open opportunity to give out references of comparable films. If you enjoyed this movie, I recommend you also watch this.
Chris Ryan
We could just call that recommended if you like.
Craig Horbect
Well, we could double Feature similar to that, right?
Chris Ryan
Yeah, yeah.
Bill Simmons
But maybe. Is that better than Double Feature? If you like this movie, try this. Or does Tubi do that? The greedy overlords evil to be the.
Craig Horbect
Next recommendation on the Algorithm Award.
Chris Ryan
Yeah, next Algorithmic recommendation.
Bill Simmons
And then he says he wants us to change the title of the Kid Cudi Pursuit of Happiness Needle drop. He said the Ringer dramatically overestimates the importance of Project X and culture today.
Craig Horbect
Disagree we underestimate it.
Bill Simmons
Yeah, I disagree too. He said he offered the Johnny Depp's Black Betty Airport Walk and Blow. That's definitely not happening.
Chris Ryan
Really? Funny that you think Black Betty and Blow is bigger than the project X1.
Bill Simmons
He did offer the Billy Bats. Atlantis beat down in Good, fellas.
Chris Ryan
That's incredible.
Bill Simmons
Yeah, but we're not getting rid of Kid Cudi. New category from James Winston.
Chris Ryan
Thought this was Jamis Winston for a second.
Bill Simmons
The I used to guys like you in prison awards for the wildest, oddest, most fucked up line of dialogue in the movie.
Chris Ryan
Keep it. We'll keep it in mind.
Craig Horbect
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Can you see some of these? I didn't think I sent some of these to you.
Chris Ryan
I can see them.
Bill Simmons
How do you see them?
Chris Ryan
You sent the whole thing to me.
Bill Simmons
Oh, I did. I didn't mean to. Yeah, I only meant to send you like seven.
Chris Ryan
Yeah, no, you sent them all to me.
Bill Simmons
Oh, I really up. I meant to only send you seven.
Chris Ryan
Well, I'm not like following along. I have no idea where you're going with these.
Bill Simmons
New category from Daniel in Mexico. How about a category called Would this movie work in another genre? Example Tropic Thunder is a survival drama. Rosemary's Baby is a comedy. Or Mrs. Doubtfire is a horror thriller film. So they did that with the Shining, with the family dramedy, the Torrances.
Craig Horbect
I like when they recut trailers.
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Chris Ryan
I often think about how this movie would be different if Curb youb Enthusiasm music was playing.
Craig Horbect
There's a great one, Mrs. Doubtfire as a horror film on YouTube.
Chris Ryan
Oh, is there?
Bill Simmons
Yeah, that's good.
Craig Horbect
Trailer.
Bill Simmons
A burning question from Robert G. This is good. You've given the opportunity to have either Cruise or Hanks on for Rewatchables as your co host. You can do a movie they've been in, a movie the other's been in, or a movie of your choice. Who's a better co host? What movie are you doing? Is the play for them one of them to come on a movie you haven't done yet that's theirs. Like Cruz for All the Right Moves or Hanks for Turner and Hooch? Or is it more interesting to talk about a movie the other one's in? Personally, I think a recruiting with Cruz is the only choice.
Craig Horbect
So this is a good question as a co host, Cruiser Hanks.
Bill Simmons
So it's almost like a subcategory for Cruiser Hanks.
Chris Ryan
I. I think that Hanks would be able to kind of go in different places and riff with you and talk about.
Bill Simmons
I Think, hey, let's be honest.
Craig Horbect
Curiosity.
Chris Ryan
Incredible stories about the production of the films that he's been in.
Craig Horbect
Even if he hasn't been in it. Just the. The entertainment factor is so much higher.
Chris Ryan
Eyes Wide Shut would be the. The greatest podcast in the history of the world.
Bill Simmons
Hanks is better as a podcaster. Like, he could hang in with all these.
Chris Ryan
Do we know the Cruise can't hang in as a podcaster?
Bill Simmons
Cruz, from a I can't believe this is happening standpoint is better. The upside of Cruz is higher. If we're doing like before sunrise with Cruise and he just fudgeing. Goes on a tangent about when he filmed Mission Impossible 5 in France.
Chris Ryan
Yeah. He's like, I've been to Vienna. You may remember it from Mission Impossible.
Bill Simmons
He's just acting weird and doing Cruise stuff.
Craig Horbect
It's Cruise. It's not Cruise.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
I would feel safer with Hanks.
Craig Horbect
But what does that even mean? That the pod won't be a disaster?
Bill Simmons
No, I just feel like it would be a safer bet to be a good pod. There's a Cruise version of the.
Chris Ryan
Yeah, like there's a Cruise thing where you make too many cigarette jokes and he's like, cigarettes are poison. You know, like he gets really mad at you.
Bill Simmons
We also had Robert G. Also said you need to get burnth on, off or on for Sakari or the Account rewatchable as co host along with cr. If CR can muster up the courage to do Wayne Jenkins with Bernthal on the pod, keep it, otherwise you got to retire it. I Disagree. From James McGowan. I'm slightly older than you. That's my line. But I'm sure you remember the CBS late movie. If the Outlaw, Josie Wheels or Kelly's Heroes was playing, I was staying up. You could do an old school broadcast TV Rewatchables month. I also love the Hollywood nights. I think that would be tough.
Chris Ryan
So what would be some examples of movies from that era?
Bill Simmons
It's all the westerns.
Chris Ryan
Okay.
Bill Simmons
It's Towering Inferno, movies like that.
Chris Ryan
Poseidon Adventure.
Bill Simmons
Yeah, Poseidon Adventure. I don't know that those movies are pretty tough to watch now. Yeah, I tried to watch Poseidon Adventure. It's rough.
Chris Ryan
Happens in that, right?
Bill Simmons
Yeah. There's a lot of good people. And it's like, ah, this should be good in 20 minutes. And you're like, they can't get Shelley Winters up on a cliff.
Chris Ryan
I forgot about that.
Bill Simmons
They still can't get her. Oh, my God. Really rough. A tweak from Mark McGowan. Big fan of the Pot. He says on the reden of Thieves show this week, you threw out drinking milk from the carton for Apex Mountain. I wanted to submit the scene from Terminator 2 when the T thousand kills John's foster dad through the milk carton while he's drinking from it. Who knew the T1000 cared so much about proper hygiene and etiquette? What did we say? The best one it was. We said Anchorman. Right. Have you beaten anchorman for milk? Drinking milk out of the.
Chris Ryan
We haven't done Anchorman yet.
Bill Simmons
We haven't. It's on the list.
Craig Horbect
Was that 04?
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Missed the anniversary category section from Mark C. Where would you cast Philip Seymour Hoffman?
Chris Ryan
This is a great one. Honestly, no movie that he couldn't improve marginally. So.
Bill Simmons
So maybe every movie we just try to figure out what party would have played.
Chris Ryan
Yeah. Like Godfather 3. Could he have been a cardinal? Why not?
Bill Simmons
I really like this one.
Craig Horbect
That's good.
Bill Simmons
So maybe it's right after Cruiser Hanks.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Chris Ryan
Where's your cast? Philip Seymour.
Bill Simmons
Yeah. We'll test drive it. Be tough to do before sunrise. New category from Kevin Paulman. The Sideways. I'm not drinking any. Merlot award for life imitating art presented when something ridiculous in the movie unexpectedly gains a cult following and becomes a bonafide thing. Examples, Sideways, when Miles's Merlot Tantrum arguably torpedoed more Merlot sales for years and counting, which we talked about. Office space, the rise of the red swing line, stapler, Big Lebowski, Jeff Bridges turning into the dude in real life. Rounders, the poker boom and Empire records. Rex Manning Day. Another Empire records. There's not enough times this happens, but I like the spirit behind it. My favorite part is Jeff Bridges turning into the dude, which I think actually happened.
Chris Ryan
Yeah. You could do what should have been trending out of this movie. Like, what trend should this movie have started?
Bill Simmons
Right.
Chris Ryan
You know, should this should. Should Goodfellas had started a Layla revival or something? You know what I mean?
Craig Horbect
Did people. Did Jaws like, significantly affect people going into the ocean?
Bill Simmons
Yes. I was terrified of the ocean.
Chris Ryan
Yeah. It's affected Bill.
Bill Simmons
It really did. I remember walking by the ocean the next summer and being like, being afraid to go in. Category tweak from Mike Roylance. This is great. He says he thinks he's listening to every Rewatchables episode. He wants to lose evil laughing Ramon Raymond.
Craig Horbect
People hate Ramon Raymond.
Bill Simmons
Yeah, we're good.
Chris Ryan
I saw Andy Garcia out the other night.
Craig Horbect
No way.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
He's like, are you the fucking asshole who does The Rewatch. He wants us to replace Ramon Raymond with Wilford Brimley from the Firm. He says it's the hardest he's ever laughed. Listen to a pod. What does he think we need more Brimley I. If we had Daniel Plainview and WOLFER BRINLEY For 2025, we're in pretty good shape.
Chris Ryan
That's good. Who do we drop? Ramon Raymond. And have we ever done Philip Baker Hall?
Bill Simmons
No. We can drop him.
Chris Ryan
Okay.
Craig Horbect
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
It's always funny to say his words last. And Philip Baker Hall. What was Brimley's character in the Firm? Did he have a name? Yeah, I did tell you what it brings, Mitch. Heartache. Random question from RO F. William Devisher was his name. Do you think movie theaters should invest more resources in auditoriums and anniversary movies and also feature more old school rewatchable movies? What do you think, Craig? You're a younger guy who likes to go out and do stuff, I think. Do you like on Alamo Drafthouse?
Craig Horbect
I've actually never been to an Alamo Drafthouse. There are opening one on the west side, I heard. Yeah, we just saw. I mean, they put Interstellar out last month and it was huge. And among like everybody I know people were thrilled to go back and see it.
Bill Simmons
But is that an LA thing or is that an around the country?
Chris Ryan
I think it did really well. Wasn't it like in the top 10 box office or whatever?
Bill Simmons
Is that true?
Chris Ryan
Yeah, I think out on imax, I.
Craig Horbect
Think there is a thirst for that, for people to go re experience what something could have felt like 15 years ago when it came out.
Bill Simmons
Because that's 7 is is on IMAX. IMAX right now. And I was like, oh, yeah, because.
Craig Horbect
It'S something you can't recreate. I mean, I don't know about really old movies, but movies like of the 2000 that kids who are 20 years old now wish they could have seen. I think that works.
Chris Ryan
I think it's a thing.
Bill Simmons
Chris had a good point about 7. Probably not a theater you want to be in, but the other people there, it's just you and 17 guys by themselves.
Craig Horbect
That's a good category. What's like the worst movie audience you'd want to be with?
Chris Ryan
Exactly.
Bill Simmons
I told you. I think I told this story in the Rewatchables when I saw Henry Portrait of a Serial Killer by myself in Boston at the BU Theater.
Chris Ryan
Was there anybody else at the theater?
Bill Simmons
It was like eight other guys. And we were all kind of like monitoring each other. We're like, what are You. What are you up to? Everyone, like separated perfectly by six seats.
Craig Horbect
Kind of watching worst movie to see with your. Your parents or your in laws. That's another good one.
Chris Ryan
Oh, yeah.
Craig Horbect
One night we were like in the last week, should we watch a Nora? And I was like, no.
Bill Simmons
No. Is in the top. That'd be way up.
Craig Horbect
We skip the first hour and then.
Chris Ryan
We could come in the first shot of anor.
Craig Horbect
I'd be like, all right, I'm out.
Chris Ryan
Want to watch this with my mom? Yeah.
Bill Simmons
I would say number one would be Monsters Ball.
Chris Ryan
Okay.
Craig Horbect
Make me feel good.
Bill Simmons
Make me.
Chris Ryan
No, don't open your eyes.
Craig Horbect
Mar.
Bill Simmons
So this one caught my attention. Category idea from Michael Morrison. Would this movie be better if it was directed by Spielberg or score.
Chris Ryan
Ooh.
Bill Simmons
Could that be follow Cruise and Hanks?
Chris Ryan
That's good.
Craig Horbect
I like that.
Bill Simmons
The only problem I had with it is are there arguments? I feel like each one would be naturally.
Chris Ryan
Well, I think if they circled each other and enough projects over the course of their career, they've had like slight overlap here and there. Schindler's was a big one, right? Wasn't that the big one that Scorsese was going to direct and Spielberg took over?
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Chris Ryan
Right.
Craig Horbect
But like any crime actiony thing will go to Scorsese, right?
Chris Ryan
I don't know. I mean, you could make the argument that it would be fascinating to see Spielberg try something like that.
Bill Simmons
Well, let's test drive it with the.
Craig Horbect
Last couple we've done Home Alone 2.
Bill Simmons
Den of Den of Thieves. Spielberg or Scorsese? I mean, probably Scorsese.
Craig Horbect
Jerk it. Scorsese.
Bill Simmons
Friday Night Lights. Spielberg or Scorsese?
Craig Horbect
Spielberg.
Bill Simmons
Yeah. Home Alone 2. Spielberg the Gambler.
Chris Ryan
Well, really has a feel for New York.
Bill Simmons
The Gambler.
Chris Ryan
Scorsese.
Bill Simmons
Disclosure, Definitely not Spielberg. No Running Scared.
Chris Ryan
Scorsese.
Bill Simmons
Yeah. The Replacements. Both of them say no thanks. What about Meet the Parents?
Chris Ryan
Probably I could see that being Scorsese just because he's worked with De Niro so much.
Bill Simmons
Body Double.
Chris Ryan
Spielberg.
Craig Horbect
Oh, interesting.
Chris Ryan
Yeah. Because he's a big Hitchcock guy too.
Craig Horbect
Yeah, that's true.
Bill Simmons
Yeah. Thanks, Spielberg. Last 1, Halloween 4. What do you think? Probably Scorsese.
Chris Ryan
That was the last one.
Bill Simmons
That was great.
Chris Ryan
That was awesome.
Craig Horbect
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Category ideas from Johnny O. The Bill Simmons hardcore award for most inappropriate Google search on a work computer. Inspired by the film. Really doesn't happen that often, but it's.
Chris Ryan
I like having words during the pod and it'll be like, don't Google that. Don't Google it. Yeah.
Bill Simmons
The Innocent Bystander award for the Background character whose life is forever changed due to the actions of the movie. But of course, it's never acknowledged in the film. He says the girl on the girl Scouts team in dodgeball who tests positive for PDS gets her team disqualified.
Craig Horbect
Beaver tranquilizer.
Bill Simmons
What happens to her down the road? That's pretty funny. And then, last idea that memorabilia from this movie you'd want the least.
Chris Ryan
Yeah, that's really good.
Bill Simmons
I think we. Maybe we add that it's like memorabilia you'd want the most or the least and you get either choice. Right?
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Craig Horbect
Like Demi Moore's substance body at the end of the film.
Bill Simmons
Absolutely, yeah. Question from Stephen M. Why would you guys do a rewatch on Rocky III and Rocky 4 before the Oscar winning Rocky 1? It makes no sense.
Craig Horbect
Bill, would you like to play that one?
Bill Simmons
I don't know. I don't know what Craig's doing. I don't know what he's doing over there. We did Rocky 4. We did the first.
Chris Ryan
I did a Rocky with you. Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Been saving you for Rocky 1.
Chris Ryan
Thank you.
Bill Simmons
I did Rocky 3 with sound Gus, my buddy Gus. Because we had watched Rocky 3 together so many times.
Chris Ryan
And did you do four with Kyle?
Bill Simmons
Rocky 4 was Kyle. I think that was during COVID.
Craig Horbect
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Maybe it was Zoom era. It was a Zoom pod and I just did it. In the order of Rocky movies that I like, My favorite is three.
Craig Horbect
Really?
Bill Simmons
My second favorite's four. One's slow and features the controversial seduction scene.
Chris Ryan
And then two, which really Rocky should.
Bill Simmons
Have gone to jail for 10 years. That's really rough to watch.
Craig Horbect
No.
Bill Simmons
Intimacy coordinator.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Rocky's Rocky made some mistakes, but Rocky one, we probably do one, and then maybe we do Rocky two, but it's just the last 25 minutes from her waking up from the coma. It's a mini rewatchables. First hour and a half of that movie. Shoot that in the sun. Oh. Movie suggestion from Elijah. Big fan of the rewatchables. You've already done Alien. I'd love to hear you guys discuss Aliens.
Chris Ryan
Me too. Elijah.
Bill Simmons
It's one of the best sci fi action films ever. One of the better sequels. It's immensely rewatchable.
Craig Horbect
I just rewatched Alien last week. I have never seen Aliens Cr.
Bill Simmons
Any thoughts on Aliens?
Chris Ryan
I like that movie.
Bill Simmons
Oh, you do?
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Had no idea.
Craig Horbect
Are you out on Aliens?
Bill Simmons
No, I really like. We've been saving it. It's a classic.
Chris Ryan
And just the nude conversation alone must be incredible.
Bill Simmons
I saw Aliens on a date.
Chris Ryan
Did you?
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Chris Ryan
That's a long Movie for a date.
Bill Simmons
Nothing happened after I was not the future sports gal. Nothing. A complete from Scott Murphy. I really hate that these pods are so long, but damn it, there should be a fact checking category, particularly with Bill quoting other movies. For years he's been saying cross the beams instead of cross the streams. Ghostbuster. But he managed to equal that during the Longest Yard pod. When Anacott Steel is brought up and he goes to quote Wall street, he says, blue Oyster loves Anacott Steel. No, no, no. It's Blue Horseshoe. Blue Oyster is the bar in the Police Academy series. I know he's old, that his braid is becoming mush, but damn. Either get it right or stop quoting other films.
Craig Horbect
I disagree. That gives the show its flavor. Yeah, yeah.
Chris Ryan
He's also like, it's always that. This pregnant pause where it's like, should we correct it?
Craig Horbect
We all look at each other.
Bill Simmons
It's hard to host.
Chris Ryan
I really want to come.
Craig Horbect
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Push the vaccine.
Craig Horbect
Yeah, right, right.
Bill Simmons
Pre vaccine.
Chris Ryan
The polio vaccine. Is that what you're talking about?
Bill Simmons
Pre vaccine.
Craig Horbect
Half the time you guys bring up a character's name from a movie. I have no idea what you're talking about. I don't mind. I can't believe how good you are remembering characters names.
Bill Simmons
I'm. I'm fine with up. Occasionally I. Up in the Meet the Parents with Owen Wilson. Luke Wilson, for like five solid minutes.
Craig Horbect
Yeah.
Chris Ryan
And you wanted to be corrected earlier on that one.
Bill Simmons
No, Kyle, eventually, during a break.
Craig Horbect
I told you, an ad break. That's the easy.
Bill Simmons
Kyle was nice enough not to correct me.
Chris Ryan
Do you then say, I can't believe I've been saying that wrong, or do you just.
Bill Simmons
Yes, I acknowledged.
Craig Horbect
You acknowledged it, but would you rather somebody correct you?
Bill Simmons
Which one was it? Was it Luke or Owen?
Craig Horbect
Owen was in the movie. You were saying Luke.
Bill Simmons
Yeah. See, I still can't get in your.
Chris Ryan
Head because I'm like, there's a category named after.
Craig Horbect
Would you rather somebody correct you after the first mistake or kind of let it sit and tell you no?
Bill Simmons
I think it's funnier if I don't.
Craig Horbect
Know you're doing it for the game.
Bill Simmons
New category idea for Jacob Murphy. Every now and then you guys talk about some great names in the rewatchables movies, like Mitch McDeer, Kelly Leak. These names should be given the category of the Brock Landers and Chess Rockwell Award.
Chris Ryan
This is up there, the Whip Whitaker award from Flight. Yeah.
Bill Simmons
So you could talk me into this just being a standard category.
Chris Ryan
Best name, best name, best character name.
Bill Simmons
Yeah. Because we Always talk about it anyway. Maybe it goes in what stage the best. I don't know. New category from Daniel C. The Carl from Walking Dead award for what character would survive the longest in the zombie apocalypse. Classic rewatchables. Examples include Jem in the Town, Buck and Boogie Nights and Tubs in Calderon's Revenge. This cannot be a category. But I like Tubs. I like the spirit. I like. They threw in tubs.
Chris Ryan
Yeah, he was really speaking our language.
Bill Simmons
New category from Zach Smith suggesting the Barney Cousins award for most inexplicable accent work. Recent winners, Carrie Elways and Twister, Lindsay Cross and Slap Shot. Dennis Christopher and Break it Away. Any bad Boston accent.
Chris Ryan
What's wrong with Lindsay Cross and Slap?
Bill Simmons
I don't know. He's drive by. But then he says Barney could also be a great addition to the Wayne Jenkins category. I'm not against that one. Hello, Chris.
Chris Ryan
So we're gonna add in a character on a movie that's now is not available to stream at all.
Craig Horbect
Hello.
Bill Simmons
Drink the coffee, Chris. New category idea from Michael Connor. I would love to see a new category called what is the perfect age to see this movie?
Craig Horbect
Love this great one.
Bill Simmons
Seeing the breakfast club at 15 is so much better than seeing it at 10 or 25.
Chris Ryan
What's the perfect age to see Goodfellas one minute from now has been seen Goodfellas.
Bill Simmons
Goodfellas is the best.
Craig Horbect
I have to imagine for most movies that are great, it's like 16 to 22. Right.
Chris Ryan
I think it's end of high school, beginning of college. Yeah, I think there's plenty of films.
Craig Horbect
Be weird if it was like 48.
Bill Simmons
Right.
Chris Ryan
But the movies from that like 95 to 97 era, 99 era are the ones I still think about the most. Probably because of what age I was.
Craig Horbect
I mean, if there's movies about parenthood, maybe you want to be a parent first. But most movies for super bad, you're never going to say 38 years old is the best time to.
Bill Simmons
I think one thing I've noticed is the movies that are serious but then have. Are secretly funny are the ones that have aged the best for me. Like Heat and Goodfellas that are great movies I loved anyway, but have like. That's so funny now when I watch it. Like, hey, just. I was texting you over the break about Tommy when. When he shoots Spider and then he gets mad at Spider. Get up the Spider that actually when.
Chris Ryan
We did Silence of the Lambs Live. Yeah, mostly as if Silence of the Lambs was a comedy.
Bill Simmons
So in some ways I think the movies sometimes age where it's actually better, like the 35th time you've seen it than the first time, you know, because I feel that way about. I definitely feel that way about Goodfellas. I enjoy it as much now as I ever did. But I would say sometimes movies hit. We talked about this in the past with when we did the kicking and screaming. You have to see a movie like that. Coming of age characters right around the time that you have to be the same age. Yeah, my son really loves those. Kid in the It's a summer. And the kid who's got the job for the summer and all these people. Snack shack.
Craig Horbect
Yeah.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
He loves those movies. He's always like, dad, where are more movies?
Craig Horbect
I agree.
Bill Simmons
The summer movies. Movie suggestion from Used Car Cowboy. This is just a weird email. I'm gonna read it. The 1978 invasion of the Body Snatchers would be awesome. He wants us to do it. A plus movie plus. It has Jeff Goldblum playing a character called Belichick who ends up completely stoic, emotionless, and it features the 197879 Golden State Warriors. I'd like to imagine Brooke Adams boyfriend was watching Jerry Maxwell and Alvin Martin from Inside Moves taking that team in the playoffs. Also puts me in mind of finding out how many people in my life were pro maga.
Chris Ryan
I think Used Car Cowboy just did the whole pod for us.
Bill Simmons
Stephen and Charlotte from Massachusetts wrote this one together. Hey, everyone. Love the show. My dad and I are big listeners. Had an idea for a new category. The Kathy Griffin in Pulp Fiction. Mike Myers and Inglourious Basterds. Lena Dunham and Once Upon a Time in Hollywood award for most jarring casting decision.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Thanks for such a great show.
Craig Horbect
Hope you kind of like the casting choice that took you out of the movie, which for me was. And we talked about this, my friends, over the last few days. Stanley Tucci and Conclave. I'm like, stanley.
Bill Simmons
Stanley Tucci?
Craig Horbect
Yeah. You're like, I've been watching you make pasta in your home on YouTube for.
Chris Ryan
The last three years, but Ralph Fiennes didn't bother you.
Craig Horbect
No, no.
Chris Ryan
Right.
Bill Simmons
This is an interesting category.
Chris Ryan
I'm trying to think of a recent movie that we've done.
Bill Simmons
This casting took me out of the movie for two minutes.
Craig Horbect
You can overcast a movie, like, not everybody needs to be someone. Lena Dunham. And Once upon a Time, you're like.
Chris Ryan
Okay, yeah, Lena Dunham is not the movie's fault. Like, sometimes you'll be watching, like, running scared, and you're like, oh my God, that's Jimmy Smits. Like that's like a pretty.
Bill Simmons
It's like this is more like this. Like I think Lena Dunham and Once Upon a Time in my Hollywood is a great example of this.
Chris Ryan
Maybe that was a little bit too much mustard.
Craig Horbect
Yes. It feels like stunt casting to a degree.
Bill Simmons
The reverse is Tom Noonan in Heat? Yeah, it's all out there.
Craig Horbect
It's a good one, though.
Bill Simmons
A Rocky 4 nitpick from Paul on the 39th anniversary of the end of the Cold War, I have one nitpick to regarding the greatest movie ever Made. Paulie says, what about the Rose bowl game? But the fight takes place on Christmas Day, one week before the Rose Bowl. I don't know what to do. This information I'm just passing along because it obviously has been bothering Paul for a long time. And then Danielle pointed out the hereditary episode we mentioned it was piano wire. Yeah. So I thought it was a rope saw. They're used to cut down trees. The only reason I'm really mentioning this detail is to emphasize the details Ari Astor puts in his films.
Craig Horbect
So it was not a piano wire. It was a rope saw.
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Craig Horbect
I was unaware of that.
Bill Simmons
Rope saw would make more sense due to the area the family lives in.
Chris Ryan
Oh yeah, Utah.
Bill Simmons
Likely used to make the tree house. Dave Van Buskirk wants us to do the sure Thing, which has been on the list forever, but it's another movie that's just not available.
Chris Ryan
Also a big one. I'm a one crazy Summer fan and a better off dead fan.
Bill Simmons
So sure Thing just not around a slew of categories from Brian Greer. The Jenny Gump Award for the character who seems nice but is actually a terrible person. I really like this one. Maybe it's a conditional one.
Craig Horbect
The Pam Beasley. Yeah.
Chris Ryan
Mike Wallace in the in the Insider.
Bill Simmons
Would this movie have been better if someone died?
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Not against it. The Ice Storm Award. Would this movie have been better if some of the characters randomly had an affair, are fucked a little dark? And then he has monthly themes. Vengeance is Mind Month about characters seeking vengeance. But then Dog Month. Best in show. Marley and Me, Turner and Hooch. You know, I've. I've circled Dog Month for a while. I can't find the fourth movie.
Craig Horbect
So those are the three.
Bill Simmons
Those three would definitely be in Dog Month.
Chris Ryan
I don't know. And it seems like you would want to present like a positive.
Bill Simmons
Well, family loves dogs.
Craig Horbect
Dog, Marley and me. So sad man.
Bill Simmons
Dog's purpose. Really good. Oh, the sled dog movie that what's his face made? Paul Walker, Eight Below.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Awesome.
Craig Horbect
What about that Channing Tatum dog movie recently?
Chris Ryan
Oh, the dog dog, yeah.
Bill Simmons
Hasn't gotten there yet.
Craig Horbect
Homeward Bound. Big one for me as a kid.
Bill Simmons
Carl Rice writes in for categories. I like the idea of the heat. Okay. Award for the moment the movie steps up a notch.
Chris Ryan
Yeah. Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Not bad.
Chris Ryan
I like that. That's like Denzel Washington giving Ethan Hawke angel dust. He's like, oh, you like to get wet.
Bill Simmons
Didn't know that last one from Jackson in Toronto. He loves the show, listens every week. He's been thinking about Full metal jacket for 30 years. Sergeant Hartman has a smart ass response for every answer the privates give. In one scene he asks Joker, do you believe in the Virgin Mary? And Joker says no. The response gets a slap in the face. But also Joker gets promoted. Whole pivotal scene built around the response. What would have happened if Joker said yes? Would the response be outstanding? There's no way the sergeant could have given a disgust or response for answering yes. I think there should be a category for what would have happened if they just did or said blank.
Chris Ryan
Yeah. So like this is a little bit of a cousin of the online idea of like Die Hard. What if he just like leaves in the first five minutes or. You know what I mean? Like there's like ways in which movies could be over in 15 minutes.
Craig Horbect
There's a horror film, like what if they just moved out of the house?
Bill Simmons
So.
Chris Ryan
But if there's like a pivotal line that if this person.
Bill Simmons
What if he had said this? Yeah, there's something there. Like including some good ones out of that.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Craig Horbect
Inglourious Basterds. If he does the correct three does.
Chris Ryan
Yeah. Do we. Do we easily win?
Bill Simmons
I can't believe I screwed up. I can't believe I screwed up and sent you the wrong doc.
Chris Ryan
That's okay.
Bill Simmons
I sent you. I meant to send you a doc.
Chris Ryan
Did you feel like it affected my performance?
Bill Simmons
No, I. I only had wanted you to prepare for seven things. Instead I sent you a doc with you jumped around. That's fine. We'll use a couple of those. I mean, the most important thing is that Daniel Plainville and Plainview.
Craig Horbect
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Daniel Van Plan. How'd you correct me? I don't know.
Chris Ryan
Daniel Plainville is fall forward for Indiana and.
Bill Simmons
And Wilford Brimley. What's his character?
Chris Ryan
Devashaw.
Craig Horbect
What's his kid's name? And There Will Be blood. Hw.
Chris Ryan
Yeah.
Craig Horbect
Yeah, I saw hw.
Bill Simmons
What did we say we could do Wednesday Rewatchable you said that was the.
Chris Ryan
The Luke Wilson Mailbag. So basically people would write in with their Luke Wilson movie.
Bill Simmons
I like. I don't mind. I don't mind having people send hottest takes and doing a special little mini episode and seeing if it works. All right, Craig Rollbeck, Chris Ryan, we'll be back next week with an actual movie, so thanks for your patience, but the rewatchables will be kicking back in every week after this episode. Thanks for everybody. Thanks to everybody who sent in. Really fun, great email questions. We didn't get to nearly all of them, but thanks for that. If you ever want to email us the rewatchables3mail.com Good to see you guys.
The Rewatchables Podcast Episode Summary: "A 2025 Rewatchables Mailbag"
Release Date: January 21, 2025
Host/Author: Bill Simmons and The Ringer Team
Introduction
In this engaging episode of The Rewatchables, host Bill Simmons along with co-hosts Chris Ryan and Craig Horbect dive deep into a listener mailbag, exploring a wealth of audience-suggested categories, theme months, and insightful musings about beloved rewatchable films. Stripping away advertisements and intros, the conversation centers around enhancing the podcast's interactive segments and refining the way they celebrate and analyze iconic movies.
Mailbag Overview
At the onset of the episode, Bill Simmons introduces the concept of the mailbag, discussing its previous iterations and expressing excitement about the diverse array of listener contributions. The team acknowledges the longstanding relationship with their audience, emphasizing the value of fan engagement in shaping the podcast's content.
Listener-Suggested Categories
A significant portion of the episode is dedicated to exploring new category ideas submitted by listeners. These categories aim to add layers of depth and humor to the discussions surrounding rewatchable movies.
The Chris Ryan Award: "Would This Movie Be Better If a Main Character Smoked?"
The Dan Campbell Scale:
Five-Word Summaries:
The Lieutenant Weinberg Award:
The Jules Winfield Award:
The Steven Seagal Hard to Kill Award:
The Carl from The Walking Dead Award:
The Sideways Merlot Award:
The Barney Cousins Award:
The Ridge Rumble Award:
Theme Months Suggestions
Listeners also proposed several theme month ideas to organize future podcast episodes around specific motifs or film genres.
Rotten Rewatchables Month:
Comeback Month:
Unwatchables Month:
Much to Bill Chagrin Month:
Dog Month:
Specific Movie Discussions
The episode delves into specific films, exploring listener insights and the hosts' personal anecdotes related to rewatchable classics.
Heat:
Rollerball:
Aliens:
Rocky Series:
Fantasy Draft: Building the Ultimate Heist Crew
A standout segment involves a creative exercise where the hosts collaboratively draft an ultimate heist crew using characters from various heist films. Starting with iconic leaders like Neil McCauley from Heat and Jim from Heat, the team considers roles such as the calm strategist (Rust from Ocean's Eleven) and the wild card (Mr. White from Reservoir Dogs). This imaginative discussion highlights each character’s strengths and how they would synergize in executing a flawless heist, blending the strategic with the spontaneous.
Additional Category Enhancements
The conversation also covers tweaks and expansions to existing categories, ensuring they remain relevant and engaging. For example:
"Would This Movie Work in Another Genre?" prompts discussions on how films like Room for Paradise or Mrs. Doubtfire could transform if reimagined within different cinematic genres.
"What Is the Perfect Age to See This Movie?" from Michael Morrison [76:04] encourages the hosts to evaluate films based on optimal viewing ages, considering how audience perspectives and life stages influence the reception of certain movies.
Conclusion
As the episode wraps up, Bill Simmons and his co-hosts express gratitude towards their listeners for the plethora of creative ideas and heartfelt suggestions. They tease upcoming episodes, hinting at tackling fan-favorite films like Hunt for Red October and Aliens, and emphasize their commitment to continuously enhancing the podcast experience based on audience feedback.
By thoughtfully integrating listener contributions into their discussions, The Rewatchables not only celebrates timeless films but also fosters a dynamic, interactive community of movie enthusiasts eager to revisit and reinterpret their favorite cinematic moments.
Notable Quotes
Bill Simmons [03:45]: "I've been thinking a lot about the categories because we had a bunch from the last thing too."
Chris Ryan [11:08]: "I feel like there should be a promotion and relegation system for the."
Craig Horbect [28:32]: "That's how we'll decide who gets to pick the movie. The other people have to watch. We'll do a coin toss live on camera."
Bill Simmons [37:01]: "I think we. Maybe we need to do the canceled Rewatchables month."
Chris Ryan [73:34]: "We can add Sam Darnold just to mix it up. I like the system actor idea."
Final Thoughts
This episode of The Rewatchables is a testament to the podcast’s vibrant community and its dedication to exploring the multifaceted nature of rewatchable films. By embracing listener feedback and continuously evolving their categorization system, Bill Simmons and his team ensure that every episode remains a nostalgic yet fresh celebration of cinema’s enduring classics.