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Bill Simmons
This episode is brought to you by Apple and at&t. Scroll long enough and you'll hear it all. Miracle diets, fitness trends, you name it. But with iPhone and Apple Watch, you get meaningful insights from a very trusted source your body. You can track sleep quality, cardio fitness and more. Then unpack all the information in the health app on iPhone to get a picture of your overall health. These health insights are developed with clinical experts from start to finish. Find out more@apple.com health Apple Watch is not a medical device and should not be used as a substitute for professional medical advice. This message is brought to you by Apple Card. Hey, you could be earning 2% daily cash back in that purchase and that one, and even that one. That's because Apple card users earn 2% daily cash back on every purchase, including everyday items they buy online or in store when using their Apple Card. With Apple Pay, not an Apple Card customer, you can apply in the Wallet app on iPhone subject to credit approval. Apple Card issued by Goldman Sachs bank usa, Salt Lake City Branch terms and more at Apple Co Benefits. The Rewatchable is brought to you by the Ringer Podcast network where you can find Kyle Brinton here in the Rewatchables. He doesn't have Ringer Podcast, but he's like, he's. You're in the whole ESPN vortex now. You're on the schedule, release show, you're doing all kinds of things. You got a nice setup. Look at this in the background.
Kyle Brandt
It's great. I, I get to go on with ESPN talent. I sat down with Peter Schrager last night and I said, what's up with it, vanilla Face? And we just kept running. It was great.
Bill Simmons
We were doing comedies all month here on Rewatchables. A bunch of them are on Netflix. We've done There's Something about Mar and Tropic Thunder. And now I think one of the best comedies of the 21st century, Borat is next. Borat, you've wanted this for a while. Yeah, we both love it. I'm going to start here. Sacha Baron Cohen, one of the great comedy actor performances in a movie ever. For me, it's a one on one. I almost feel like it's lost how good he is in it because Daborak kind of took over and he's done a lot of good stuff. You know, he had the Ali G show, he's made a bunch of movies. But I'm just like in awe of him, this movie, how, how incredible he is. So I'm starting there.
Kyle Brandt
Fantastic. And I think you just. We're onto something. I think it's a little bit defiled in the wake of it in that the annoying guy in your friend group for the next five years would go, my wife. High five. And yeah, it kind of ruined this amazing character that he did. But not for me. My appetite was wet to do this movie with you, Bill, because I was listening to something about Mary Pod and you guys were talking a lot about your experience in the theater. Hardest I've ever laughed in the theater. People screaming in the theater. This was the same thing. I remember being in the theater for Bora. I was at. I think I was at the Chinese Theater right there in Hollywood. And it's not just that people were just laughing. Ha ha. There was. There was screams. There was people like pulling their jackets up over their head during the naked Fight. There were people who were leaving. Like it was. It was the most chaotic two minutes I've ever had in a movie theater.
Bill Simmons
Was this movie the Naked Fight on a big screen. Yeah, it's almost like a. What's age the worst? Because it's just never going to be the same. Watching it at home on a 50 to 70 to 100 inch TV, whatever TV you have to see that on a 50 foot screen was. Are you having earpiece problems with your earpiece?
Kyle Brandt
You know, this is first world problems. I'm already gonna. I'm gonna have to email Bristol. This thing sucks, Bill. If they gave me a crappy earpiece. The one from NFL Network worked fine, by the way, for years doing this podcast. And now we're 10 seconds in and Bill's trying to talk about how big Azomat's ball sack is on the site and I can't get the earpiece in.
Bill Simmons
That's right. We're keeping it in, people. This. We're professionals. Yeah, but on a 50 foot screen.
Kyle Brandt
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Ass. It's probably my favorite part of the movie. Just when he gets off him and Sasha Barracoda, it's like he got concussed by Ed Reed. And I don't think he's acting. I actually think he's like. It's almost smelling salts. Bring the trainers out. It's so disgusting.
Kyle Brandt
Well, they say that the most infamous hit ever in what I do is the. In this era is the Vontes perfect. And Antonio Brown that people think changed Antonio Brown as a person. Yeah, I think that one Sacha Baron Cohen went into Azamat's Chod and a different person came out. Like, I don't think he was the same guy. That went in.
Bill Simmons
He was never funny as funny ever again. Best. So. Oh, on the great comedy actor performances thing, I was thinking about, there's different types. Like early on in the 60s, 70s, and you would have Peter Sellers playing all these different parts. Then we get to the 80s and you'd have like the force of nature comedy stuff like Belushi and Animal House just going in, clearing out the cafeteria and it's like hilarious. Or Eddie Murphy and Beverly Hills Cop. Even Chevy Chase and Fletch you can go through. This is so different because I think the degree of difficulty was just a hundred out of a hundred. Like, it's not just a scenarios he's in, but he also has to stay in character.
Kyle Brandt
Yep.
Bill Simmons
He's gotta weather whatever the storm is and he's also gotta be really funny. And there's. I didn't even know until we did the research. When he's reading his dictionary, it's actually all these jokes they wrote for the situations. Right. He's not like, I gotta look what's. But he's actually like trying to figure out the. Right. So they're prepared ahead of time, but not totally. So it's this combination of like. It's like guerrilla improv, basically. And I don't know how he does it. I don't know anybody else who could have done this.
Kyle Brandt
I think one of the most underrated things about this movie is the writing, because there's brilliant stuff that they came up with. The bit where he goes into the hotel elevator and starts unpacking because he thinks it's his room, like that is a written script and it's a really funny idea. But the guys that you brought up and all the people that we love, Eddie Murphy and Chevy Chase, they're pretty much playing themselves. Right. They're just funny, charismatic people. You have to find someone who's really, really doing deep character work. The people that come to Mike Myers was doing characters. Steve Martin and the Jerk is a character. And what's really jarring is if you were a fan of the Ali G show back when Sacha Baron Cohen wouldn't do media if you'd ever see an interview with him. It's so crazy how he is this really thoughtful, erudite British man that doesn't sound anything like his characters. It reminds me of Daniel Day that when you see him do interviews, you're like, fuck, that's not Bill the Butcher.
Bill Simmons
Like, what?
Kyle Brandt
That's the best actor I've ever seen in my life.
Bill Simmons
Right.
Kyle Brandt
That's the difference with Sasha's like, he's nothing like any Bruno Ali G, none of them. And that's makes it so compelling.
Bill Simmons
Yeah, there's this awesome Conan O' Brien interview that he did. I think, like 2016, 17 rage. And he tells this whole story about a deleted scene from Borat where Borat films. Basically films a porn movie. But he's telling the story as Sacha Baron Cohen. But then he keeps lapsing into Borat as he's telling the story of how it is. And it's just like, it's so confused in a way. It's almost like watching primal fear. Like watching Ed Norton go back and forth between the two people because he's like this smart British guy just telling this story, but then all of a sudden, he's Borat. And by the way, the story was amazing. They film. They go to an actual porn set. It's about how Borat needs more money after breaks up with Asimov, before he meets Pamela Anderson. So he actually appears in a real porn film. And he's fucking with the director because he's supposed to be like the room service guy. And he comes in and they're having actual sex and Borat's supposed to join in and he keeps screwing up the scene. And the director's getting madder and madder.
Kyle Brandt
This sounds great.
Bill Simmons
And he's like, I don't know. Her vagine doesn't have hair on it. I don't know if I could. You have to put hair on her vagine. And the director's like, we gotta get some hair for her vagine. And it's like this whole. I guess it went on for an hour and he's telling the whole story to Conan, and Conan's just dying. And that got cut out. Which is another thing about this movie. They have, you know, I think. I think they had, like, I don't know, 400 minutes of stuff. Yeah, they narrowed it down to 89, but they had all this deleted stuff. A lot of it's on YouTube, some of it's on the DVDs, and some of it's great, but they. They were so big on what the flow of the movie is. Not losing the flow.
Kyle Brandt
Isn't that a statement, though, about the movie? Like you said all the time, deleted scenes usually suck. And you know why they're deleted? Because they were bad. The deleted scenes in this are funny as hell. I was watching them on YouTube. Borat works at a fast food restaurant. And just like, he's messing. It's great. Like, you could have had a whole separate movie with the separate. The deleted scenes, which are actually funny. No, no, deleted scenes are that great.
Bill Simmons
These are really good now. And they were big. Like, they. He explained with the porn scene, because they had the naked fight. They felt like two. Two kind of naked set pieces would have stepped on the Asimat fight, which they knew was, like, gonna be the key to the movie. So they cut it. And it's like a classic kill your babies. You know, Like, I always talk about this with documentaries. That would always be, oh, man, we can't lose that scene. It's like, we gotta lose the scene. We gotta get to 90 minutes. And so the good thing is all this stuff's on YouTube. Best mockumentaries ever.
Kyle Brandt
Yeah, I have this.
Bill Simmons
So I think Spinal Tap, best in show, Borat, Waiting for Guffman. And I'm gonna count Blair Witch. Those were the five that jumped out for movies. Is there anyone else you would put in there?
Kyle Brandt
That's the list that I have, minus Blair Witch, which is a good addition. And I feel like Spinal Tap gets so much respect because it feels like it was first, at least for that generation. I love Waiting for Guffman. The small town theater. For me, it's my favorite one. Other than this, maybe. I mean, I had it. When we get to Apex Mountain, is this the best mockumentary ever? It probably is. I like it better than Spinal Tap, but I know Spinal Tap came first.
Bill Simmons
What's weird is all of those movies, except for Borat are 20th century or, like beginning of 21st century. None of those movies are from the last 20 years. I was trying to figure out what happened, and I think the answer is it moved to TV. Cause the office comes in second half of the 2000s. And then you have even stuff like Jury Duty. You have, like, Andy Samberg did that Seven Days in Hell, which I thought was really good. But it just kind of moved away from movies for some reason. And I'm not. Not totally sure I agree with it. I don't. Or maybe it's like we don't have the same kind of improv comedians. Or I. Or maybe it's moving more toward TikTok. But it's just weird to me. We haven't had a good one of these in 20 years since Borat. That's strange.
Kyle Brandt
I think you're onto something where I'm watching this a lot and some of the bits that he's doing. One of my favorite bits is when he just gets to New York City and he's just I'm new in town. Nice to meet you. And he's just introducing himself to people. That's. A thousand assholes on TikTok do that. They're just messing with people on the street. That was what Billy Eichner was doing. That's like. I follow some of these Instagram accounts that just. That my kids like. One of the ones that I follow is called Humor Bagel. And it's just this guy who walks around Central park and just farts. And that's all it is. And people love it.
Bill Simmons
That sounds amazing.
Kyle Brandt
It's so follow Humor Bagel. He just farts and people laugh. My kid dies laughing. I watch it sometimes without my kid, but it's like, that's what Borat's doing. He's walking around Central park messing with New Yorkers. But now it's just on Instagram, like, it's everywhere. You can do it for free.
Bill Simmons
Well, one of the writers made the. He's. Dan Mazur said, yeah, we were in Dallas for two and a half weeks. We were worried about a local newspaper getting a hold of the fact that we were around. And he said. And he said this. Ten years ago today, there would be people with cell phones, it'd be on Twitter, it'd be on social media. And that was the problem. When they made this sequel. People knew the sequel was happening as it was happening. And I think it was one of the. I mean, Covid kind of killed the sequel. The impact of it. I think it was just a weird time for it to come out.
Kyle Brandt
When you say sequel, you mean the subsequent movie film?
Bill Simmons
The subsequent movie film, which I gotta say, I've only seen once. And I'm sure it's better than I remember it. But it was just. When it came out, it was so weird. We'd all been by ourselves for, I know, I don't know, seven, eight months. We just had a pretty tumultuous summer and there was an election coming. It just felt like the timing was wrong for it.
Kyle Brandt
I gave it a spin this morning, and I hadn't seen it since it came out, and I had forgotten. It's very Trump driven. You're just like, I don't know, I don't feel like spending time with all that type of shit, and I don't think it has the magic. And also, to your point, like, Borat was a huge deal, huge deal at that point. He was everywhere. Now, it still did some good things. Like, the Rudy Giuliani thing is absolutely insane. And they. I'm sure that was a big touchdown for them. But it's not like this one.
Bill Simmons
No. And that was another thing in the research you could feel. Cause I always look for, are there anniversary pieces about the movie or history stuff. And there was a bunch of pieces in 2016 about the 10 year anniversary of this movie that were like these big think pieces about. Borat was having fun with this stuff in 2006. But now this is what our nation is becoming and these people are winning. And you could feel the tenor of what they're trying to do in the movie actually shifting as it just became more kind of omnipresent as dialogue and conversations that we were having. So I think the legacy of this movie is a little strange. It is because the stuff that he's doing in 06, some of it's really rooted in. It's five years after 9, 11. Right. He has that. That joke in there about will the Jews attack, attack the World Trade Center?
Kyle Brandt
That's why they have to drive, because
Bill Simmons
they don't want to fuck, drive. And some of that stuff was funny then and really feels rooted in 06. And then some of the people who we were making fun of, we all kind of made fun of those people. But now I feel like it would have been this politically polarizing thing to have a movie like that. So it just made me feel like more innocent times, weirdly.
Kyle Brandt
And the south park guys have said the same thing. They're like, it's hard to do the show now because, like, just the reality is what our show used to be. It's too much of a spoof.
Bill Simmons
Right.
Kyle Brandt
It's not as ripe for the pickings. But I mean, listen, when this show, when this movie came out, what was your relationship, Bill, with, like, with the HBO show? Because I was a massive fan. It's one of my favorite HBO shows ever. It was a big deal for me that they were making a movie.
Bill Simmons
Yeah, yeah. I watched. I watched the show. There were some characters I liked more than others. I always thought Borat was the funniest one. So I was really happy that they were gonna expand that universe. But it was just such a creative show and in general was a really fun time for comedy because we were having the movie boom. We had this whole generation of new comedians coming in. And then there was some real experimentation going on on some of the cable channels.
Kyle Brandt
Yeah. For HBO to do that.
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Kyle Brandt
Like, I just remember watching it was early 2000s. I would TiVo it like it was 2002, and there'd be Borat, Bruno, and then Ali G. And it was almost exclusively the sit down interviews. I mean, it wasn't any of the road trip stuff. But he would sit down with like Buzz Aldrin and just be like, do you think man will ever walk on the sun? And then he'd be like, no, it's too hot. But then he'd be like, what about in the winter when it's cold? And it was just. I was dying laughing. And that's again, the writing. They had that shit so funny and so perfect and. And his sit down with Andy Rooney where he walks off set and then Ali G is like, he's chucking me out because the color of my skin. I was like, it's. That's not my HBO Rushmore. I have it that high. I love it.
Bill Simmons
Yeah, well, I was, I was in LA writing for Kimmel show at that point.
Kyle Brandt
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
And all of us were like that. Whatever that guy is doing, it's. It's almost over here. You know what I mean? You even feel like you're in the same, like, you know, stratosphere with that. What he's. And the other thing is it was hard to separate him, the human being from all those characters. It's. I think he's. Him and Mike Myers are the two where when they were trying to be normal, it always felt the most disorienting. Anytime you just saw Mike Myers being Mike Myers, it's like, I don't. What's. I don't understand what's happening. Like you're a normal person from Canada. It just never felt right.
Kyle Brandt
Well, remember, imagine if Sasha had tried to do like his. So I married an ex murder, where he's just a guy driving around like Boston or something, and it's like a robbery. And then in real life, then he like, then he marries Isla Fisher who's coming off Wedding Crashers, who's huge too. And then they're this power couple. But I think to your point, like post Borat, Sacha Baron is like, I don't know. It was never my favorite thing. He would always be. He would be in these Sweeney Todd and he would be in Ricky Bobby and he was always funny.
Bill Simmons
It was just the Chicago 7 movie. Yeah. When we started the Ringer, we were on the Sunset Gower Studios and he had a company there and he had like an office space and everything. And we were always like, are we gonna run into him? Like, what would it be like to run into him? And just kind of bracing for the disappointment that he probably be like, hey, how you doing? And not be.
Kyle Brandt
Have you ever met him, though?
Bill Simmons
I've never met him.
Kyle Brandt
Yeah, me neither. You never run into him? Hbo, Nothing like that. Yeah, it's weird. Love to, but I'd be nervous.
Bill Simmons
He's. I think he's tall. Like, I think physically he's a little more imposing than maybe you'd realize. Most comedians are shorter. So you mentioned it was created for the Aoi G show, turned into the movie. Most of the scenes were unscripted. The film's participants, which I think people know. But for the most part, there's only four actors in this movie and nobody else knows what's happening. They would have to sign releases and things like that. And then he had that dictionary that he was using. But the legend of the movie shoot, the police were called on him 92 times. The FBI at one point followed him because they kept getting reports about a Middle Eastern man driving an ice cream truck through America.
Kyle Brandt
And.
Bill Simmons
Yeah, and this was like height of post 9 11.
Kyle Brandt
Sure.
Bill Simmons
The director, Todd Phillips.
Kyle Brandt
Yep.
Bill Simmons
Who's made most famously the Joker and the Joker sequel, but also did the Hangover. All three Hangovers and Road Trip. And I think he's one of the best comedy directors of this century. Quit the movie after like 11 days, which I. I knew and forgot. But apparently after the rodeo scene, he's like, fuck this. Yeah, I'm out of here. Like, people are trying to kill us. I'm done.
Kyle Brandt
So the rodeo scene, he goes in, you know, he's.
Bill Simmons
He.
Kyle Brandt
He does like these crazy jingoistic comments about Premier Bush drinking the blood of all the terrorists, which is really funny. And he like, revs up all the rednecks and they're hell, yeah, we love you. And then sings the Kazakh national anthem to the tune of the Star Spangled Banner. And it's just like all other countries are run by little girls. It's fucking incredible. And then as they. Apparently the people were like, I don't know, they're gonna lynch them or something. I don't know what was gonna happen. And they had to bail fast. And I think Todd Phillips is like, I gotta bail. I'm outta here.
Bill Simmons
Yeah. They said there were some creative differences with them too. And there's a shocking lack amount of information for this, considering this is one of the most successful comedies of this century. Todd Phillips is famous. He quit the shoot and it was really hard to figure out what happened. But one of the things from the research was that Azomat wasn't in the movie initially and it wasn't until after they so they bring in Larry Charles, who's, I think, probably most famous for Curb youb Enthusiasm, Seinfeld, like, pretty famous comedy guy, but has also been something of a fixer. Like, he was pretty legendary for kind of saving entourage early on when they didn't know what they were doing behind the scenes. And then he comes in and saves this movie and becomes this triumphant thing. But, yeah, Todd Phillips quits and probably the right move.
Kyle Brandt
I mean, it was a huge hit that he walked away from, but he had a whole bunch of other movies, too. And it's like, I don't know if the creative differences were like, sasha's going to die in this movie, and I'm not, because, I mean, that may scare the crap out of you. Being in that rodeo place. It's terrifying. There's, like, 3,000 people. But I also. You mentioned. You mentioned this character. I just want. I love peeling back the curtain on our. On our text chain. I want people to know that all of the conversations we had about Borat leading up to this pod, Bill was all over Azamot. I can tell you're a huge Azmat fan, Bill. Come on. As always. Azomot.
Bill Simmons
I'm number one for Azimut. Even when he goes away and he comes back and he's on Hollywood Boulevard as chaplain.
Kyle Brandt
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Bora thinks he's Hitler. He's this character actor. What was his name? Ken.
Kyle Brandt
Ken Davidian.
Bill Simmons
Ken Davidian. I wrote down. It's. It's. He's David Tyree.
Kyle Brandt
Okay. Like, the miracle moment. Yeah.
Bill Simmons
He is like, I have 32 career catches in my life, and I bounced around, and my career was over almost immediately, but I had this one moment that is probably the greatest super bowl moment of all time. Unless you want to go Malcolm Butler. He was like this. The research. He was one step lower than a character actor. He's just like, I don't know. You're doing ER season five, and he's in the ER room for. With one line.
Kyle Brandt
Yeah. Here's your stethoscope. Here it is. And the headline about Azimat. He's American. He's from la.
Bill Simmons
Right. He.
Kyle Brandt
He's doing an accent. He's speaking, actually Armenian, which is not the same language that Sasha is speaking. I think he's speaking Hebrew.
Bill Simmons
He's all there.
Kyle Brandt
They're back and forth. They're not even talking the same language. And there's this great audition story where they bring in Ken Davidian, and he, like, just does this whole rant in Armenian and screams and screams and screams and Leaves. And they're like, wow, that guy was pretty good. And then like five minutes later, he came back and he walked in, he goes, oh, hey guys, I forgot my hat. And they're like, holy shit. Oh my God. You're the part. You're immediately. And that was like the legendary. That's him catching it over Rodney Harrison from Eli. Like, that's the moment.
Bill Simmons
No question. And just one of the all time weirdest bodies you've ever seen in a movie. I don't. I don't. Did they cover up his dick? Did they need to? Because his belly was hanging over it. Like, I have no idea how they. That is an all time. I don't know how they did that scene. Scene.
Kyle Brandt
All right, so do you want to get to that scene later or do we do it now?
Bill Simmons
Let's do it now.
Kyle Brandt
Okay, first of all, you, Azimat, you just said it perfectly. We've seen a lot of heavy or obese people on screen. Fine. What is it about his that's so different? It's the strangest body that's ever been on camera. He has these crazy like playboy looking breasts that look different from any other man's bare chest that I've ever seen. And then his. You never actually see his dick the whole time or pubic hair or nothing. You see nothing. Like he has a full marsupial Kendall kangaroo. And then meanwhile, it's so jarring because as they're fighting, Borat is blurred out. So you're like, why is Borat getting blurred? And then they're not blurring. Azimuth. But I still can't see it.
Bill Simmons
It's so weird. But you do get to see his balls dangling over. Well, the other thing with him that I never knew this. So he's bouncing around as a character actor and he's also running this garbage business basically in Malibu. He's garbage collection, like sanitation. And it's going. And he owned a couple lunch places in LA too. So he's kind of like this hustler. Businessman.
Kyle Brandt
Sure.
Bill Simmons
Gets this contract to do some sanitation stuff in Mexico City, goes down there and it's unclear what happens, but he gets cleaned out and has to declare bankruptcy. Comes back, gives one more whirl at the acting thing and gets Borat. And then basically, if you look at his IMDb, he's dined on this for 20 years, basically. But this is. Nobody knows his name. He's the ultimate, that guy. You just see him like Azimut.
Kyle Brandt
Azamat.
Bill Simmons
But yeah. So he secured a waste management contract in Mexico City. And then the research says his company was ill prepared. Davidian maintains he was victimized by a corrupt system. But it ended multinational litigation, trade arbitration and bankruptcy.
Kyle Brandt
Oh my gosh.
Bill Simmons
Azimut.
Kyle Brandt
Come on, buddy. And you know what? I watched the first five minutes of the sequel. And you're like, oh, Azomat must have been so excited when they're making a sequel. Like, holy shit, I'm back. And they. Borat sits down in a leather chair and he gets up and realizes that they skinned Asimat and left his penis right on the top of the chair. So he's dead. So he doesn't even come back. But you finally see his dick.
Bill Simmons
We also had this movie, had six different lawsuits which we'll get to later for people who are in it, which is pretty fun. I really loved the relationship of Azma and Borat. I really enjoy. I don't. It's like a true buddy cop. It's the only thing I can think of that's similar to it is coming to America with Eddie and Arsenio. Like just like the lead guy with his like assistant dude. And they just have this whole shorthand and the little. The. The assistant's there to serve the other guy. But there's like a little tension too. It's just really good.
Kyle Brandt
The assistant's trying to get laid on the side too. And they're trying to make a buck a little bit. It is great. And they, their chemistry is awesome in it. And even though you never hear them speak English to each other and we never see Ken Davidian again.
Bill Simmons
Oscar nominated for best screenplay. Yeah. Won a Golden Globe for best comedy. I have some Oscar stuff coming later. This movie is 84 minutes.
Kyle Brandt
Beautiful.
Bill Simmons
Craig's not here today, but this is a minus 16 on the Horlbeck scale. I think this might be the record. I don't know if we've done a movie that's been 84 minutes. This might be the first one we did.
Kyle Brandt
Just one of the guys that is about 20 seconds long and it's still longer than this movie. And by the way, it's fine. I don't care. It could be even shorter. You just don't see 84 minute movies.
Bill Simmons
$18 million budget.
Kyle Brandt
Yep.
Bill Simmons
It made $262.5 million and spawned a sequel. Roger Ebert could not find a review.
Kyle Brandt
No way.
Bill Simmons
I think Raj sat this one up. I think he probably would have liked it. Humor. Somebody wrote a review but it. It didn't seem like it was him. We don't know how it feels. We're going to take a break, come back and go through a slew of rewatchable scenes. This episode is brought to you by ZipRecruiter. If you've ever seen me trying to push one of the documentaries that we've just finished that I've spent a lot of time on, that I'm really proud of. Because if you're involved in the right documentary, the process of it, getting it, cutting it down, getting it to the right place, and then it hits a point where you're like, oh yeah, this is good. I can't wait for people to see this. And you can see the, the light of my eyes as I talk about it. When you love what you're doing, I think it shows. Which is why I want to tell you about ZipRecruiter. If you're hiring, you can find that kind of enthusiasm easily. That same one when I'm talking about the Vince McMahon documentary that's coming up and you can just see, I'm like, I can't wait for you guys to see this. You find that kind of enthusiasm easily with ZipRecruiter. Try it free@zipcruiter.com Rewatchables ZipCruiter just added a new feature that highlights qualified people who are interested in your role. They'll even be able to tell you why they want the position. Find candidates who really, really, really want your job on ZipRecruiter. Four out of five employers who post on ZipCruta to get a quality candidate within the first day. Even the ringer over the years, we got a couple of people from there that we really valued. Try it for free@ziprecruiter.com Rewatchables Once again, ZipRecruiter.com Rewatchables Meet your match on ZipRecruiter.
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Bill Simmons
I got the opening scene when he's introducing everyone to his town. So I watched this. I watched this twice. I've seen a bunch of times. The first time I watched on the treadmill, I'm like, I'm going to bang out. I'm going to walk 4.0 in the treadmill and watch Borat. And I almost, I almost kind of wobbled and fell like three times as a mistake because I'm laughing.
Kyle Brandt
Yes.
Bill Simmons
The first time the, the, the running of the Jew just killed me. I just, I hadn't seen in a while. And I'm just. The egg. Yeah.
Kyle Brandt
Beat the shit out of the egg.
Bill Simmons
And then it goes back to Irk in the Town Rapist. And he's saying goodbye to him. He's like, just only humans. And I'm just like trying to. And I could like barely do a straight line. But I like meeting the mechanic and the town abortionist. His sister's the number four prostitute. We're just off. We're like, hey, we're crossing a line. Guys, get ready.
Kyle Brandt
We're going to be doing jokes for 84 minutes. Buckle up.
Bill Simmons
Borat in New York, you mentioned that the TikTok has basically ruined this. But. But I think my favorite is when the two ladies are walking to the thing. It's like, very nice. How much?
Kyle Brandt
Very nice. How much is a great one? My. My hero is the most New York asshole guy all time. When Borat gets in his face and he goes, if You. If you try to kiss me, I'll pop you in the fucking balls. And like, that guy, like, comes down from Westchester. He's a banker. He does cold plunge. He plays squash. He, like, drives, like, a really nice BMW and he's not about to get touched on the fucking street. I'll pop you in the balls, guys.
Bill Simmons
He's definitely a dinner with Schrager at
Kyle Brandt
Luger's, where they don't take credit cards. Cash only.
Bill Simmons
I'll take you. It's great. That guy sued the movie because he was upset how he was portrayed. Disagree. I think he. I think he came off great. I would have been excited. Yeah. I think know what he's suing.
Kyle Brandt
I mean, I have him down at possible Dion waiters category with one line. I like him so much.
Bill Simmons
I have Pat Haggerty, the humor coach. Yeah. The suit is back. Nah. But the be story just absolutely kills me. And the first time I saw this movie, I. I think I saw it with Jacko and House.
Kyle Brandt
Okay.
Bill Simmons
They were here for. I didn't see this movie in the theater. I don't think. I don't remember why it was fun. But we watched this, and below. Fudgeing killed us. And we made below jokes for like a year after that. You never get this. And then one day he gets.
Kyle Brandt
He gets that.
Bill Simmons
So I'm ashamed to say that this has been a running joke at my house for.
Kyle Brandt
I love this.
Bill Simmons
My kids.
Kyle Brandt
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Just me taunting my son. He's like, are we going to go? You will never get this. It's the only Borat joke I do. I don't know why it makes me laugh, but.
Kyle Brandt
So what is it? When he asked for, like, can I get a PS5 or something? Or can we have pizza for dinner? And that's when it comes up.
Bill Simmons
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Can we go? Are you going to take me to the clipper game? I can't. I'm going with somebody. You would never get this.
Kyle Brandt
They put him with Pat Haggerty, who appears to be the least funny person ever put on camera.
Bill Simmons
So funny.
Kyle Brandt
To teach him comedy. And he tells a story about his special needs brother breaking out of the cage to rape his sister. And then gets a high five from Pat about the story. And then Pat.
Bill Simmons
Pat's realizing in real time, oh, God, they're filming this.
Kyle Brandt
Yes. And then he's like, you know what? We need to teach this. This visitor to our country. Let's do 2006. Not jokes. Which is 13 years, I think after Wayne's World, no one was making not jokes. And then Sacha Barron just butchers it by fucking it up over and over. It's so good.
Bill Simmons
Did you see there's a wide shot of the chalkboard where he has all these things written down. There's this one side that has some of the darkest shit that I guess he was going to go through with Borat. I don't know if Pat Haggerty did that or the directors did that.
Kyle Brandt
Yeah, it's all. It's like the darkest in molestation, sexual, all this. I got to think that maybe the directors did that because Hagerty is a stupid blazer with gold buttons. Like he's going to a piano recital. He's going to teach comedy.
Bill Simmons
That's a great scene, Borat watching tv, which is the second time I almost fell off the treadmill because it kills me when he's flicking channels and Married With Children comes up and Al Bundy makes like some joke and Bart's like,
Kyle Brandt
we're so. We're so in lockstep. I have this. For what? Shay's the best dude. Good old fashioned hotel channel surfing. Post it up on your bed. You got room service coming. You ordered a chicken quesadilla. He flicks through Cops, Married With Children, a quick jingle all the way with our guy Arnold and Jake Lloyd and then Baywatch and it's like, fuck, I wish I could go back and just channel surf because Baywatch will go to commercial. Then you go back to Married With Children and then you go back to a little bit of jingle all the way. He's so happy and so am I.
Bill Simmons
Yeah, so like, be careful, cj. That's it. This, this movie has so many good, like 27 second moments. And then at the feminist meeting when he, when he. It fades away from the dialogue and he goes. I could not concentrate what the old man was saying. A lot of great jokes, driving instructions, funny. Borat crashing channel 16.
Kyle Brandt
First of all, hold on. How about in the feminist meeting where he goes, hey, pussycat, give me a smile. What's the matter, baby? Why? Some of these, these feminist women are dead serious about shit. He's pussycat. And baby in them killed me in the theater. And then everybody laughed and he said, I had no idea what this old man was saying. Everybody laughed. It's mean. But they laughed anyway. Yes.
Bill Simmons
Go. Driving instruction. Borat on channel 16. The weatherman kills me in this.
Kyle Brandt
Love it. Worst suit of all time.
Bill Simmons
He's the only one who really fully understands how funny this is. He's just like, it could barely do the weather. We mentioned the Kroger Valley, Valley Dale, Imperial Rodeo, whatever it's called. Don't sleep on how great. I don't know if he's the head of the rodeo or the director of the rodeo, but I know where you're going. One of the one minute. All time. Whatever he is, he checks. He's crossing lines.
Kyle Brandt
Oh, the guy about. That's what we're trying to get done here. And he gives the high five and all the end. And he talks about the gays. I love that he's talking about the gays. And he's wearing, like a yellow bandana thingy. Bandana around his neck. Like some sort of scarf with his cowboy hat and his spurs. What is he talking about?
Bill Simmons
I also love the crowd shots as he's. As he's getting them riled up before the song. And it's like the third time it cuts to the crowd and he's like, we'll drink the terrorist blood. And there's one guy in the crowd who's like, yeah, but he's like, completely genuine.
Kyle Brandt
So that nothing will live on their soil. But the lizard. Hell yeah. Yeah. It's so funny just to watch the crowd.
Bill Simmons
How do you think, though? I was gonna do this in an answer bros, but how do you think the horse fell over? It felt like that was a legitimate thing.
Kyle Brandt
I think that's a random coincidence where maybe it was getting news miracle and then they cut right after it falls because it's a. It's like. I just think it happened because I
Bill Simmons
remember the TV ads. The horse falling. The horse falling was like Borat coming, you know, Monday or whatever. But the horse falling, it was almost like, what is this movie?
Kyle Brandt
It was just a miracle. And I think Todd Phillips left right after the horse fell. I have to, like, there's so much respect you have to give to their producers and all the people doing work when they get the announcer to do that. Please welcome Borat Segdev from Kazakhstan. Like, it's so staged and set up and they obviously had a conversation about how. And then he walks out there in his dumb walk. It's all set up so well. Even before he starts singing. It's so. It's just so well done.
Bill Simmons
It's the only time he seems a little nervous.
Kyle Brandt
Hell, yeah, he seems nervous.
Bill Simmons
His voice is definitely, like, not 100%. Yeah, the. The Jewish Airbnb or wherever the better breakfast that he's at. I think this is my favorite scene. I think this is the most rewatchable for me. I Don't know why. I think it's like a perfectly constructed comedy scene. And we should mention Sacha Baron Cohen is Jewish. And so a lot of the Jewish stuff he's doing in this, it's pretty funny that he's flipping around, but just him going in there. And then she was like, what do you mean, Jewish? Why do. And she's like, well, we're Jewish. And all of a sudden, like the Halloween music comes in and they're looking around, the. The shift in the shapes, them busting out of there like they're at the end of Django and chained. Like every piece of that, I think is just like a perfect comedy scene.
Kyle Brandt
See, this is a referendum on the viewer, on me. That to me is almost the pee break scene. And I'll tell you why.
Bill Simmons
Oh, I want to hear it.
Kyle Brandt
I feel so bad for those people. I'm getting old and I'm getting soft. And like, those two people are so nice. And they're like, here's your sandwich, here's your bed. You want another pillow? And welcome. These are my paintings and he's calling them a devil and throwing money at them. It's like, I know that's the joke and I know where he's coming from, but like, I. I get soft. Those people are so fucking nice.
Bill Simmons
See, the only people, the only people I feel bad for this movie are the feminists. The old man, when he makes the old man joke, just start watching that after. But the one who takes the biggest the next scene is the Southern manners diner.
Kyle Brandt
Come on, let's go.
Bill Simmons
When he says there's three wives, he's like, you two. In my country, not so much.
Kyle Brandt
So much.
Bill Simmons
It's. It's just absolute drive by shooting at that poor lady and her husband's sitting there. Yeah. I almost wonder if they should have cut that. It's the by far the meanest moment in the movie. In a movie. That's pretty mean.
Kyle Brandt
My, they go crazy for you too. And then pause you, not so much. Holy shit, that's brutal.
Bill Simmons
So that has. It has the retired retarded, where he keeps getting confused by the guy.
Kyle Brandt
Yep.
Bill Simmons
Is it physical or mental?
Kyle Brandt
And then he goes, it's very nice. You let someone at table with retardation. He's like, no, no, no, no, it's not. That's old Ali G show stuff. Does it all the time.
Bill Simmons
But the poop in the bag is one of the craziest moments, I think in a comedy. It's unbelievable. I always forget how unbelievable it is a lot of unanswerable questions about. Was that. Was that actually his poop? Did he poop in a bag? Did they get poop from outside? What happened? Like, the lady's reaction is unbelievable. Where she's just like, oh. Like, she doesn't. I don't. Then you put yourself in the shoes of, like, what would I do if this happened,
Kyle Brandt
by the way? What do you do with the poop bag? You just take it and put it, like, in your street garbage cans. Because you can't, like, empty it in the toilet and you can't flush the bag, I guess you just take it to the street like a dog poop, right?
Bill Simmons
I wish. I wish Sasha was here. We could just ask him, like, so the poop.
Kyle Brandt
Yeah. What ended up happening?
Bill Simmons
Yeah. What, did you pour it in the toilet and then.
Kyle Brandt
And then throw the bag away? That moment was so big that in the. I think it was at the end of the Sopranos run when Sopranos was best show and biggest show in the world. Remember, like, AJ gets really depressed and he ends up with a suicide attempt. Meadow comes in, is like, oh, my God, did you see Borat when he brings the poop to the table? It's so funny. And then AJ's like, it wasn't fair to the people involved. They were trapped. And, like, there was a whole conversation. Oh, my God, that shit scene in the Sopranos, about how funny it is. And Meadow's right.
Bill Simmons
Sopranos, by the way, probably the other funniest thing going on in 2006, because that was when Paulie Walnuts was really going to.
Kyle Brandt
Oh, yeah.
Bill Simmons
Another level. That was when we had the Vito. Vito blowing the guy. No, no, no, no, no.
Kyle Brandt
The Johnny Cakes. No.
Bill Simmons
Was it when the guy. Meadow's boyfriend's toe in the story?
Kyle Brandt
Finn? Yeah.
Bill Simmons
No, Vito wasn't. Vito was actually blowing the other guy. And Pa was like, what?
Kyle Brandt
Son of a bitch. And Tony just walks away. What's the disgust? He's gotta go. They're gonna kill him because of that. I mean, that's. That giant cake storyline is one of the best storylines ever.
Bill Simmons
The naked fight we talked about, the giant blackout for Borat's cock was just such a great idea. It's like a foot and a half.
Kyle Brandt
So I had a question about that. Like, if Sasha's all in, like, why
Bill Simmons
did they blur it?
Kyle Brandt
Did they blur it to make a joke because Borat's penis is big or did he just not wanna show Sasha's penis?
Bill Simmons
I think it's. His dick is so big, we had to do this giant.
Kyle Brandt
His throat.
Bill Simmons
But he's also like producing the movie. So maybe he's trying to, you know, trying to make it seem like it's bigger.
Kyle Brandt
Sasha is just fully visibly naked the whole time. And you just see it.
Bill Simmons
I think I'm better with this version.
Kyle Brandt
It's hard to. I mean, it's so good. I think you just leave it as it is. But I had that under picking nits. I'm like, why? That's a half measure. Let's see it. Let's. Why are we blurring things? But I think you might be right.
Bill Simmons
It's an all time comedy scene. The only reason it's not most rewatchable in the movie for me is Azimutz. That there's like 10 seconds here. That it's among the most disgusting things that have ever been in a movie.
Kyle Brandt
Yep.
Bill Simmons
Like Osma's at one point. He's like spreading cheeks. So let's walk through the butthole. And balls.
Kyle Brandt
They fight. Then they go to like a doggy style position.
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Kyle Brandt
And then they get into 69 where his balls are on Borat's face. And then Azmat sits down on his face like yokozuna.
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Kyle Brandt
And that is when it's the most disgusting by far.
Bill Simmons
It's. It's really horrifying.
Kyle Brandt
This is when they won the Golden Globe. And Sasha gets up there and he tells the story of that scene in his acceptance speech. And he says, my choice was either death or to breathe in the air that had been trapped in a small pocket beneath his buttocks for 30 years. If not for that rancid bubble, I would not be here today. And everyone goes crazy at the Golden Globes. And it's. It's perfect.
Bill Simmons
I did see this in the movie theater because I definitely saw that scene in the theater.
Kyle Brandt
That's the one you remember.
Bill Simmons
I just remember the. When I watched it with Jacko. And that's what it was. Jacko. One of them hadn't seen it or both of them hadn't seen it. And so I was reliving it through them. But I definitely saw the movie.
Kyle Brandt
That's until they even get to the elevator.
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Kyle Brandt
And then the one guy standing in the elevator who won't look at the camera and won't leave laugh out loud. Hilarious. And then they go into the stupid Realtors conference and are fighting and getting tackled. It keeps going. It's people screaming. I was screaming.
Bill Simmons
The elevator scene. Couldn't tell if that was rigged or not.
Kyle Brandt
Which part?
Bill Simmons
When they get in the elevator with all those People.
Kyle Brandt
The people under reaction a little bit.
Bill Simmons
Yeah. It's like, I just feel like I would be way more horrified if two naked guys came in an elevator with me.
Kyle Brandt
And there's women in there.
Bill Simmons
Yeah, there's like.
Kyle Brandt
There's a dude in there. The part with the. The elevator part, I can't speak to. There's. There's stuff out there about the Realtors conference where that was like the third time that they did that in a different conference room. Because in the first two times, like, no one did anything. They just sat there and didn't really react. Sometimes people in those conferences are just so comatose and laconic, they just don't react. But finally they got up and tackled them and all that shit. And that's the one. But they had to do that shit three times.
Bill Simmons
Pamela Anderson scene.
Kyle Brandt
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Apparently she knew she was in on it, but the bodyguards weren't, so they actually tackle him and do the whole thing. Her. Him trying to bag her is hilarious.
Kyle Brandt
Absolutely.
Bill Simmons
I don't know how you come up with that. Oh, I. I jumped ahead. The Pamela Anderson. There's two more before that that I got my. The frat guys in the van.
Kyle Brandt
Infamous scene, infamous scene.
Bill Simmons
We hit the slavery, misogyny, anti Semitism trifecta. Somebody says at one point, our country, the minorities have more power. They put in the Pam tape and they're trying to explain him. She's no virgin. Borat. He's like, no, what do you mean? They keep calling him Boris. And then at the end, one of the drunk guys says, do not let a woman ever, ever make you who you are. I can't decide if that was great advice or incoherent.
Kyle Brandt
That's the Coach Finstock award.
Bill Simmons
Do not let a woman ever, ever make you who you are. What does that even mean?
Kyle Brandt
I think you do whatever she says and you follow her around as some sort of antiquated bullshit. Like, that guy's drunk as hell.
Bill Simmons
Jack and Daniel guys are hammered. That one guy, the guy in the middle is about as hammered as you can be on camera.
Kyle Brandt
The one who says, I call people and then I have sex with them and I don't call them back. Yeah, it's like you don't call them because they don't have phone. Right. And he's like, no, no, no. It's because they don't have my respect. That was like a. That was a big talking point, that scene. I feel like that was like, have been on the View and all that. And these kids, quote, unquote, were they Victimized. And I watched it now this. This time back ready to be like do I feel defensive of. Not at all. Those kids are fucking idiots. I was in a fraternity. I was a president of a fraternity. Those guys are adults. There's a big ass camera filming them. They know they're on camera. It was just like I. I didn't feel any protectiveness at all. Those idiots at all.
Bill Simmons
Couldn't agree more. Then Borat gets cleansed in the church. That was last.
Kyle Brandt
Let that tongue go.
Bill Simmons
That was the last.
Kyle Brandt
That was the best.
Bill Simmons
And then the Pamela thing. So what do you have for most rewatchable?
Kyle Brandt
It's between the dinner scene and the naked fight. The naked fight is the most memorable scene. But I actually think the dinner scene is the most Sasha Baron Cohen scene that you could possibly do with the talk and the shitting and then not so much you. So I also. I don't think I need to rewatch as a mat that much. Like once a year I'll see naked as I think it's a dinner table scene for me.
Bill Simmons
I have. I like the. The Jewish Airbnb. Right. In a southern manners dinner is my favorite stretch of the movie.
Kyle Brandt
Excellent.
Bill Simmons
What's the most 2006 thing about this movie? Pre social media Mid 2000s Muslim resentment and high gear. And they're tapping into that. I think that's very specific. They are the Pam Anderson tape. Like a little bit of a nostalgia. It's been 10 years since it happened. She's been kind of like six, seven years out of the limelight. Everything with her feel like 2006 is the perfect spot to do all that. Pam having an autograph line and not a selfie line feels very 2006.
Kyle Brandt
At a Virgin Megastore.
Bill Simmons
Yeah, at a Virgin Megastore.
Kyle Brandt
And I got it. Listen, I got to say I had a very close relationship with the Pamela tape. Like that got me through college. I'm telling you it dropped right when I got into college. And you would download like 8 second clips of it from Limewire or something like that and you just could not fudgeing believe what you're saying. But we should do the Pam Anderson tape. And the rewatch was. When are we doing that? Let's get in here. You, me and Van we'll just do
Bill Simmons
really was 2001 a space odyssey for sex tapes. It was the Big Bang Theory. The other one I have is the ipod mini where the neighbor that he hates in Kazakhstan that Borat has an iPad and this guy has an iPad mini and he's Pissed off about it like that. So 2006.
Kyle Brandt
Are you talking about Nusutan Tuli Akbar? Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Yeah, let's talk about him.
Kyle Brandt
So they're sitting in the writers room. All right, guys, we have a comedy classic. We gotta stick the landing. Our last joke of the movie. What's it gonna be? Let's make an ipod mini joke. Not even an ipod joke. It's in the greater ipod expanded universe. A joke within a joke. Everybody know they're for girls. Like, I think that's the most 2006 thing. The iPod mini closer, the walk off
Bill Simmons
the Floyd gondoli, butter on my ass and lollipops in my mouth. A word for something I just enjoy. What do you have? What do you have?
Kyle Brandt
I had channel surfing in a hotel room by yourself with room service. Just jumping around and seeing dumb TV shows.
Bill Simmons
I had comedy that takes place in really low budget local news tv. This has been a huge resurgence for that whole industry with Instagram and Instagram reels and the amount of funny things that happen on these weird. These things that are being broadcast in Jacksonville, Mississippi, or like Akron, Ohio. These places where they're the best. You don't realize how much comedy comes out of this. All these weird people, they're either at the beginning of their careers or the end of their careers. There's never anyone in the middle and just weird shit happens. So I was glad that he did.
Kyle Brandt
Yeah. Some of my favorite clips, local news bloopers. There's one of them where the lady says, coming up, he climbed Mount Everest, but he's gay. I mean, he's blind. Excuse me. She messes it up and it's like my wife and I watch that and laugh every single time. It's for everyone. All ages can laugh at local news bloopers. And that news station they go to is Jackson, Mississippi, media market 99. And he just stands up in the middle of the interview and we. When we start, can I have microphone? We are live so good.
Bill Simmons
The guy's doing weather for Kazoo City or whatever the fuck. Whatever the fuck they are. What's age the best? What do you got?
Kyle Brandt
What's aged the best? I have just. We've kind of covered them pre smartphone public fuckery where nobody's tweeting that Borat's out. I remember when I was a sophomore in college, Tom Green came to campus. Tom Green was like. Was starting to do a show on HBO or on mtv. And like, everyone was just talking about it. Spread like this rumor, like, oh, my God, Tom Green's Here. Tom Green's here. And everyone ran to go and find him, but we weren't tweeting about it. There was no camera phones. It was nothing. And watching this guy at the rodeo in New York City and all anybody has in their hands is a beer. It's awesome. And I miss it.
Bill Simmons
I have. You will never get this saying it in real life. I have Kid Rock divorcing Pam Anderson after he saw this movie. Being mad at him.
Kyle Brandt
What is this? I heard about this?
Bill Simmons
He said he just reacted very unfavorably. And there's. Thought she was. Said some bad words. Good for her, though. Get away from Kid Rock.
Kyle Brandt
Did Kid Rock think that she was a virgin? Like Bora Kid Rock. Have you ever seen Pam Anderson?
Bill Simmons
Kazakhstan in 2020 changed their travel slogan to very nice. So congrats to them. The language section of the dvd, if you choose Hebrew. Funny stuff happens. I would encourage that if you have it. And then you mentioned how they filmed it three times. The naked running into the conference scene. The first time was an engineering lecture in Dallas and nobody really reacted. That could almost be like a mini documentary to me. How do you not react to that?
Kyle Brandt
I don't know.
Bill Simmons
You have two naked guys running in your conference and people are like, oh, that's weird. What the fuck? My number one. What stage? The best, though. I wrote down eight random lines that just make me laugh. Just like throwaway lines, which I think is the key to this movie.
Kyle Brandt
All right, all right, Go on.
Bill Simmons
I mentioned one already. Irkin. Not too much. Raping humans. Only one of the ones that almost made me fall off the treadmill. When he's buying the car.
Kyle Brandt
The car scene's great. We didn't even talk about that.
Bill Simmons
And he's doing the price. And he goes, how about 85 spits on his hand for the handshake.
Kyle Brandt
You guys, I said 117. Why don't we call it 85? No, let's call it 117.
Bill Simmons
It's great when Azimod is cleaning him and he. And he turns around and he goes, has my back pussy.
Kyle Brandt
Her.
Bill Simmons
Her vagine hang like sleeve of wizard.
Kyle Brandt
Wizard. Unbelievable.
Bill Simmons
Then he talks about when he was with the guys from the parade. And he goes, even though my anus was broken, it's just like throwaway start to a monologue of a new partner.
Kyle Brandt
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Bill Simmons
Azomat. When they're in the Civil War store after he breaks the stuff and they're trying to negotiate. Azmat goes, have you offered the pubic hair? Which he had already offered making romance explosion on her stomach. Just that's thrown in there. But then when he's yelling at Azomod on Hollywood Boulevard and the Grim reaper comes over, he goes, hey, fuck off, Death.
Kyle Brandt
Yes,
Bill Simmons
Those were all like, the random throwaways that killed me. Anyway, great shot. Gordo Award most cinematic shot. Probably Borat after getting touched by Jesus, when he. They have the wide shot of him and he. He kind of rises up. But it's not like this is a crazily directed movie. What do you mean?
Kyle Brandt
In fact, it's deliberately lo fi. The one that really makes me laugh. It could be the COVID of the movie. Azimat is like, freshening up with a swamp and, like, splashing water all over his neck. And then they pan right and Borat is just pissing into the same water. That could be an album cover. It's so good. I love great sight gag chess.
Bill Simmons
Rockwell Brocklanders award for best character name Azmat Bhagav.
Kyle Brandt
I got in the finals. I got Azamat Bagadoff and Nusutan Tuli
Bill Simmons
Akbay as the finals. All right, we don't get to hand this category ever.
Kyle Brandt
What do you got?
Bill Simmons
The Indiana Jones Ransom Body Odor Award. So writer Dan Mazur said Sasha Baron Cohen lived in that mustache hair for a year in his life. Wherever he went, he never changed because he thought Borat would smell. He was a method actor. He only had that suit and that underwear the whole time. And he reeked.
Kyle Brandt
Disgusting.
Bill Simmons
Like they're driving through, like, the south. Like there's sweaty parts. I can't even imagine how bad he smelled.
Kyle Brandt
And think about all he does. Everything he does is so physical. He's always grabbing the people and touching them and wrestling and hugging them. And it's like, I don't. I think body odor is, like, way more disgusting than bad breath farts. You name it. Body odor is fucking rancid. When I read that about his suit was never washed during the Deep south. Like, my mouth dried up. It's so gross. But it's also so perfect for Bora.
Bill Simmons
So where would you put it on a scale of zero to Indiana Jones? It might be like a 9.8.
Kyle Brandt
Well, Indy's comes from his own, like, kind of skin and chest. Like he has. He's scantily clad Borat with that dense, thick fibered suit. I think it is. It's over a nine for sure. I'd rather smell Indy than smell Borat.
Bill Simmons
I mean, Indy's in some really hot countries. He's like in the desert wearing suit for like months, fighting snakes. Kid Cudi Pursuit Happiness Award. We could either go Steppenwolf's Born to be Wild or MC Hammer. Can't touch this. I'll let you decide.
Kyle Brandt
It's the music in this movie is like a deliberately corny foreigner's idea of American music. Don't sleep on the second they see Pamela, we hit the Take my breath away for Lynn. Right, Right. It's like I would say Born to Be Wild is probably the cheesiest road trip song you could ever come up with. So I would go with that.
Bill Simmons
It's the generic, generic, generic version. All right, we're take a break. Come back with your Flex category. This episode is brought to you by Adobe Firefly. The the all in one creative studio with AI powered image and video generation built for today's creative process, Firefly helps you generate, edit and experiment fast because the asks aren't getting smaller and the timelines.
Kyle Brandt
Woo.
Bill Simmons
Yeah, still tight. With all the best creative AI models in one place, Firefly brings your ideas to life. Learn more@adobe.com Firefly this episode is brought to you by the active cash credit card from Wells Fargo. That's a mouthful, but that's because it packs a lot in. Earn unlimited 2% cash rewards on purchases with it, big or small. So whether it's buying tickets to the game or grabbing a coffee, it earns unlimited 2% cash rewards on purchases. Say it with me, the active cash credit card from Wells Fargo. Be a 2 percenter. Learn more at Wells Fargo.com ActiveCash Terms apply. All right, Flex category. What do you got? Kyle Brandt.
Kyle Brandt
All right, so we're on the same page, Bill, because I went with maybe my favorite named category, which is the I used to fuck guys like you in prison award for the craziest line in the movie. Yeah, you wrote down a few. I have three. These are the ones like when he does the narration, it's so well written because he starts talking normally and then just as you think he's just going to give us narration, he sucker punches you right at the end. Like my hobbies. Ping pong, sun, bath, disco dancing. And on weekends I trail to Capital City and watch ladies while they make a toilet like fucking crazy.
Bill Simmons
And then it's a really good boring impersonation, by the way.
Kyle Brandt
All right, number two. I arrive in America's airport with clothings, US dollars, and a jar of gypsy tears to protect me from aids. It's that one. And that is the one you already said, which I'm saying again, because my favorite line in the movie, the only thing keeping me going was my dream of one day holding Pamela in my arms and then making Romance Explosion on her stomach. Romance Explosion is gonna be my fantasy team this year. It's gonna be a pun rock band.
Bill Simmons
I love it.
Kyle Brandt
It's fucking awesome. I watched this movie this week and I was texting my friends about Romance Explosion and it was all every. Ha ha ha ha, ha ha. It's so good.
Bill Simmons
Home run. The got two awards for the naked fight, the he got game hooker scene, for most awkward scene. If someone randomly walks in the room. And honestly, not just because you're here. The Steven Seagal Hard to kill. Did this movie need a better intimacy coordinator?
Kyle Brandt
Intimacy coordinator.
Bill Simmons
It might have. You don't really think about intimacy coordinators, you know, beyond just the normal sex scenes. But I think we might have needed somebody on set for this. Like, don't put Asimod. Don't put your asshole in Sacha Baron Cohen's face. Like, he might actually get hepatitis.
Kyle Brandt
Question about that. I had an unanswerable. Do you think that Azamat washed thoroughly before that scene? Like, did he get down under there and, like, clean all that? Like, I. Professional courtesy.
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Kyle Brandt
Because Borat is not washing. We just started. He's gonna stink. So when Sasha's putting. How many times did they do that scene? He might have put his face in there 10 times. Is it like porn? Like, I think in remember, like, Becky Barnett and she's like. He's like, I'm gonna go wash my vagina. You want it clean, don't you?
Bill Simmons
Like, there's. Did.
Kyle Brandt
Did Asimat say, I'm going to go wash my grundle? Like, you want it clean, don't you? I would hope that there was a washing that happened before that scene.
Bill Simmons
Do you think this is the only podcast where somebody can seamlessly tie Becky Barnett and Asimat together and everyone listening will know what that means? I say, God damn right it is. I think it is. That's why we're closing on 500 episodes.
Kyle Brandt
That's right.
Bill Simmons
The Butcher's Girlfriend award for weak link of the film. Honestly, the length, I wish this movie was 10 minutes longer. It's too short. It bothers me. I feel like there's two more scenes and I have an idea for a scene later. But I know it's a whole leave you wanting more, but I really feel like there's that. You're on a road trip. You can literally go anywhere. You can give me any Other two, three minute scene. I just feel like we're short.
Kyle Brandt
We have it. The deleted scenes are funny. Yeah, put them in. You know what, six minutes. How about a clean 90?
Bill Simmons
Just get us to 90. Why 84? Who decided that? What do you have?
Kyle Brandt
The only time I remember Butch's girlfriend being the movie's too short. I think we said the same thing for RoboCop, which is also really short. It's a rare handout, though. I'm back to the same thing with mine. The weak link of this movie is, is it really fucked up? Like, I know it's funny and I'm not being super serious about it, but in the power ranking of people that I feel the worst for.
Bill Simmons
Oh, yeah, that.
Kyle Brandt
That etiquette lady who teaches him how to like be a gentleman at a dinner. She is this like, apparently nice looking mother, grandmother maybe. So polite. And she's the one who. He breaks out the Polaroids with the kid and his just big old dick hanging out.
Bill Simmons
Right.
Kyle Brandt
So it's one thing that lady has to see those pictures. It's disturbing. Bill, this movie was in every amc, every cineplex around the country, around most of the world. That woman in her life to this day is like, you looked at the cock pictures with that guy. Like, that's humiliating for that woman. And it's not like the bigoted frat boys. Fuck them. And all the racist and anti semites. This is a nice woman teaching them to have manners at the table. And if you really sit with it for a second, it's kind of fucked up. That's the weak link.
Bill Simmons
Yeah, that the. The lady at the manor's dinner takes the shot. The feminist.
Kyle Brandt
Terrible.
Bill Simmons
Yeah, there's a couple tough. What's age the worst. You mentioned this earlier, people doing Borat impressions after the movie.
Kyle Brandt
Yeah. And I just.
Bill Simmons
The Wayne's World effect. So Wayne's world in the 90s, that happened. Borat in the 2000s. I'm not sure what the 2010s version is of the movie that immediately people began imitating and then kind of ruined the movie a little bit inadvertently.
Kyle Brandt
Well, everyone was definitely doing a lot of anchorman in the 2000s. And then maybe the Hangover or something like that. But the Borat one was the worst. Like, and I had this for. For Apex Mountain. Do you think this is Apex Mountain for movies that set off like accent frenzies, you know, everyone like shout out to our movie Fargo. Everyone was going, oh, you betcha. Yeah. And any Arnold movie, everyone would do that. But like every Person under the sun was saying high five, my wife. And it was annoying.
Bill Simmons
Yeah. Borat says the N word in this movie. That's also in the worst Case. The worst Ruffalo Hannah Rubenick Partridge overacting award. I don't know. It's a documentary. Yeah. I didn't have one either.
Kyle Brandt
I did have one. I did have one. Age the worst, though. This is. You're gonna. Yeah. And I wish Craig was here because he would relate to this. Watching porn with your boys, like they're on that motorhome and they just throw on a DVD of porn and they're just like sitting around drinking and watching it.
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Kyle Brandt
I don't think this generation does that or would get it. No, it was a thing back in the day. You would have a videotape and seven of your friends would just sit around watching porn together and laughing at it. And that's why. Because the porn were so fucking funny back then.
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Kyle Brandt
And the 70s and 80s stuff was. You'd watch it and just as like you're watching a movie. Good.
Bill Simmons
So that might be at what stage the best.
Kyle Brandt
That's true.
Bill Simmons
The CR thinks Luke Wilson could have been Harrison Ford. Hottest. Take a word. I, I'd like to test drive Sacha Baron Cohen as in the best actor race in 07.
Kyle Brandt
Oh, what do you got? Let's go.
Bill Simmons
Forest Whitaker wins for last. King of Scotland, Leo in Blood Diamond. Ryan Gosling, Half Nelson, Peter o' Toole and Venus. And Will Smith in the Pursuit of Happiness. I'm bumping Peter o'. Toole. That was an old man award that he got nominated. We're putting Sacha Baron Cohen in there once again. We've talked about this all month. The Academy does not respect comedies. There's no way him and Borat was not one of the five best performances in 2006. So I think he should be in there.
Kyle Brandt
I, I don't love Leo there either. And the accent's ridiculous. In Blood diamond, we know that. It's, it's. You laugh at it when you watch it. He's done much better roles. He's so hurtful.
Bill Simmons
I don't know.
Kyle Brandt
I mean, the bang bang, bling, bling. What is Leo doing there? Dude, A lot better roles for Leo. Um, but I think I, I, it would have been worth him winning it just for the speech that he would have given at the Oscars because he.
Bill Simmons
Oh, my gosh. That's another reason. Just, it gets them to the Oscars. Best actor in a supporting role. I don't know if you Want to test drive Azimod here?
Kyle Brandt
But of course I do. Let's start it off.
Bill Simmons
Alan Arkin wins for Little Miss Sunshine. Jackie Earl Haley, Little Children. Dimon Hounsou for Blood Diamond. Eddie Murphy, Dreamgirls. Mark Wahlberg for the Departed. I don't think there's room for Asimod. Unfortunately. I'm happy with those five.
Kyle Brandt
Yeah, it's Alan Arkin. Fuck a lot of women. And Little Miss Movie Sunshine is good. I like that role.
Bill Simmons
What do you have for hottest take?
Kyle Brandt
All right, I'm going to. This is hot. My hottest take is I think we as a culture should go back to doing the kiss left kiss right greeting. I'm kind of into it, Bill. I think it's quick. Left right. It's crisp. It's kind of classy and. And debonair. You gotta be secure with yourself. And honestly, like, in terms of, like, you know, germs and stuff, hands are a lot more disgusting than faces. We're touching everybody's hands all the time. I would just kiss, kiss. And I'm not even saying, like, you know, like, with your wife's friend that, you know, really. I'm talking about, like, with your boys. Like, you show up to a fantasy draft and just start knocking out left, right, kisses. Like Isaiah and magic would do it. Like, there's some kind of retro cool to it thing. That's my take. I think we should bring that back.
Bill Simmons
You don't think COVID ruined it?
Kyle Brandt
I think it's back now. We have. Our next pandemic is coming. But before it does, let's do a little kiss kiss. And the best thing that Borat does, occasionally he'll push his luck and he'll go, kiss, kiss. And then down the middle, on the lips.
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Kyle Brandt
And only the men, never the women.
Bill Simmons
It's so good casting. What ifs? There weren't really any. Except for Johnny Depp, George Clooney and Steve Martin all wanted to be in the movie because they loved Sacha Baron Cohen. And he was like, no, thanks. Best. That guy word. Ken Davidian. He became. I didn't even know who he was now. He just became Azomat DM Waiters. I could offer you Linnell the prostitute. Borat's first wife, Oksana. Drunk South Carolina frat guy, Belo. We didn't never saw Belo. But I still feel like he's eligible.
Kyle Brandt
He's a big. His presence looms.
Bill Simmons
The gypsy estate sale lady Pamela Anderson, and then the. The cute couple that own the Airbnb or whatever.
Kyle Brandt
It's called, I think car salesman is. Is does his job and that he just lets Borat get every joke out. They start the scene with what does the car for a woman who is shaved down there. And he goes, well, that'd be a Corvette. That guy's totally game. Yeah, But I think the minimal amount of work with the maximum impact is Borat's son, Huey Lewis, who is holding him in the photographs with just his full dick out. And then as if that wasn't enough, go to the next picture and it's Borat's face right next to the penis, saying how proud he is of it. I think it's Huey Lewis the son. That's the best.
Bill Simmons
I love. The funniest thing is how they spell it. They spell H, O, O, E, Y. Lewis. It's all together too. Huey Lewis.
Kyle Brandt
It's so good.
Bill Simmons
What an homage to Huey Lewis. Okay, recasting couch director Steve. I have one here. It's a borderline nitpick too. And it ties into my theory that this movie should be longer. It's incredibly upsetting and I think a huge miss. And the biggest flaw of this movie that we don't have a Vegas scene.
Kyle Brandt
Okay.
Bill Simmons
It's just fucking sitting there. We're driving. We're driving east to west. We're coming up from Texas toward California. It's a no brainer. We could have some sort of Borat gambling scene.
Kyle Brandt
You're so right.
Bill Simmons
We get to tie into like the weird casino world. Him trying to figure out what's happening. Him doing something funny at strip club could be in there. Blackjack, roulette. I just feel like it's the easiest six minutes they ever could have had. It really bumps me out, dude.
Kyle Brandt
That's a. If. If you just sit him at a blackjack table and he just have him start touching the cards like, it. It would be chaos immediately.
Bill Simmons
Like grabbing chips from other people. Like, it's just.
Kyle Brandt
You know what he would do? He would take out his bag of pubic hair and like, try to put that to double down. And then the pit boss would come over. That's. Dude, that's a great idea.
Bill Simmons
How do they not. The roulette. Him betting on some crazy number because it reminds him of and something truly offensive from his family. And I don't know. There's just so many ways to go in a casino.
Kyle Brandt
The buffets, the pool. You could do the mankini at the pool.
Bill Simmons
Yeah. Put Azimon in like the topless pool at the Wind.
Kyle Brandt
The whole movie could be Vegas.
Bill Simmons
That could have been the sequel. Yeah. Borat, Gustavo, Vegas. Really missed out half asset center research. We mentioned a bunch of this stuff. So you mentioned Huey Lewis, played by an adult porn star named Stoney, who was on the gay side of the porn. 60 movies, nearly 50 box covers. Nominated for a 2001 Gayvn Award. Best newcomer.
Kyle Brandt
Look at him doing the work. Not the avn. There's a gayvien Award. Is that what I heard?
Bill Simmons
The gvn. I'm into it. Not televised. I don't know if ESPN plus has been looking at it. I know they look.
Kyle Brandt
My new co workers.
Bill Simmons
Yeah. Tell them there's some live content available.
Kyle Brandt
I will, I will.
Bill Simmons
After Borat, Stoney becomes a trans porn star named Brittany Cox. And it's spelled C O, X, capital, second X, lowercase third X. I like it. It's beautiful. That's all my research on Huey Lewis.
Kyle Brandt
I'm proud of you. You did the work. That's great.
Bill Simmons
DVD includes several deleted scenes. We talked about some of them. One of them was getting a massage at a hotel. Great. Another was visiting an animal shelter to adopt a dog that could protect him from Jews. That sounded funny. Like when we go back to 10 minutes, there's a couple. And then we mentioned that porn scene one. And then people that sued the movie and lost. The two frat brothers. A guy in the subway when the chicken got released on the subway. The Baltimore driving instructor wanted a hundred thousand in damages. Didn't get it. The getaway. Schrager's buddy from Peter Luger Steakhouse Cop.
Kyle Brandt
You in the fucking balls.
Bill Simmons
Yeah. He didn't get it. Everybody lost. Who tried to sue them? They and the guy, Dan Mazer said that they had somebody who used to be public enemies lawyer who was semi retired who was just crushing every suit.
Kyle Brandt
Yeah, that was their.
Bill Simmons
Exactly what to do. Yeah.
Kyle Brandt
Hey, what. What happened with that driving instructor at the end of the scene? And Borat's like, are you my friend? He's like, yes, I'm your friend. Do you like me? Yes, I like. Will you be my boyfriend? The guy goes, no, I'm not. Well, yeah, all right, I could be your boyfriend. And then the scene cuts. Like, what was that? Was he trying to take a run at Borat?
Bill Simmons
I don't know. That's. Maybe that's why he sued. He didn't like that.
Kyle Brandt
I think it might have been.
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Kyle Brandt
Because he was pretty cool the rest of the scene. And then immediately he's like, yeah, I'll be your boyfriend. Holy shit. What are they gonna get an office. So say that.
Bill Simmons
Yeah. The news producer of the Jackson, Mississippi show claimed afterwards that Borat's appearance led to her losing her job.
Kyle Brandt
Well, I hope not. Hate to hear it.
Bill Simmons
And then Todd Phillips leaves. This is just random. Todd Phillips. They shoot for 11 days. Todd Phillips leaves. Cause it created differences. They're trying to figure out how to add some stuff. Sasha Baron Cohen's playing basketball at Garrett Shandling's house, has some sort of thing and breaks his foot, and now is out for another eight to 10 weeks. So they filmed the movie and had to stop for, like, basically three months because the director. And then because somehow at Garry Shandling's house, which by all accounts was not the most heated basketball game every week.
Kyle Brandt
Yeah. I want to hear what's the run like there? I've never heard of the Garry Shandling game.
Bill Simmons
I mean, I know some of the people that played in that game, and I don't think it was exactly super competitive. So somehow he broke his foot anyway. And then they found Larry or Charles.
Kyle Brandt
Yeah. Back in my day, I used to do some games. I used to play some games with people. You know, I used to go to a Mike Tolan game.
Bill Simmons
Oh, yeah.
Kyle Brandt
I would go to a Brian Robbins game.
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Kyle Brandt
That's fun. They had a good game, but I never did the Garry Shandling. Holy shit. That's cool.
Bill Simmons
A lot of comedians going half speed.
Kyle Brandt
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Apex Mountain. Sacha Baron Cohen is a. Yes. I think this is the biggest he's ever been after this movie.
Kyle Brandt
Huge. Did sign whatever he wanted to do after this.
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Kyle Brandt
I said the movie. Gets shown up in the Sopranos. He's everywhere. He breaks character wins a Golden Globe. Definitely.
Bill Simmons
Pussy magnets. Apex Mountain.
Kyle Brandt
I think it has to be the guy. There's not an actual magnet. They just mean the car.
Bill Simmons
Yeah, that's okay. I still want.
Kyle Brandt
Can you install if I give you money? That's such a great bit.
Bill Simmons
Sketch comedy movies.
Kyle Brandt
Is it better than Wayne's World? Like, I. I love Wayne's World, but it's close.
Bill Simmons
I have to think about that. Maybe it's. It's. It's the 2000s version of Wayne's World. Ken Davidian. Definitely.
Kyle Brandt
Yep.
Bill Simmons
Socks full of shit. I'm gonna say yes.
Kyle Brandt
Virgin.
Bill Simmons
Virgin. Store Book Assault. Autograph. Assaults the Hotel Wellington. Yes. Lunel, who played the prostitute and then has bounced around on some other stuff. But this is probably the peak.
Kyle Brandt
I'm guessing I have a mitt to pick with Lunel. They should have cast a real prostitute. I don't like that they cast an actor for that. I remember when I saw the movie, I recognized her because she had been in some things that I know. And I was like, what the hell? Just get a real prostitute. It takes me out of it. The more real actors they have, the worse it gets. I don't think they should have done that.
Bill Simmons
Good note. Potassium exporters.
Kyle Brandt
The best in the world. Kazakhstan. Yes.
Bill Simmons
Shape shifting cockroaches. I'm gonna say they apex. That one. Pamela Anderson. No. And then naked brawls. 100% yes.
Kyle Brandt
I have male nudity in movies. Is that it? And I will give you forgetting Sarah Marshall, Jason Segel, full frontal.
Bill Simmons
They brought it back in that too. They. Yeah, it's a.
Kyle Brandt
Eastern promises. Viggo Mortensen in the bathhouse. Jackass had a lot of nudities, but that's not the same. And then the Boogie Nights male nudity was fake at the end. I think it. I think it's apex for male nudity in a. In a non porn movie.
Bill Simmons
Interesting. I'm trying to.
Kyle Brandt
I can't think of a better one. Unless it's. Unless it's just Jason Siegel just standing there with his big penis trying to
Bill Simmons
think what else I didn't prep. And thank God I didn't because then my Google search would be dip.
Kyle Brandt
You were doing the capital X, lower X, whatever the hell that girl was.
Bill Simmons
I'm already getting in trouble for Stoney.
Kyle Brandt
My.
Bill Simmons
My research on his 2001 GBN. Cruz or Hanks? I think Hanks probably has a better chance of pulling out Borat, but I think Cruz's would be funnier.
Kyle Brandt
What? Cruz? What if he was in the Les Grossman fat suit? As.
Bill Simmons
As a. Oh, he probably could have done that.
Kyle Brandt
I think to be Cruz, you would have to take some of that Frank T.J. mackie sexual or energy and you'd be like, respect the cock. High five.
Bill Simmons
Yes.
Kyle Brandt
And then he does this dumb accent from far and away. Like it would take a lot of work to get Cruise there. And Hanks kind of has the hair and the mustache in the suit. Yeah.
Bill Simmons
He's basically doing the kid from Big with an accent.
Kyle Brandt
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Scorsese or Spielberg.
Kyle Brandt
What do you think, bud?
Bill Simmons
Tough one. I'm going to probably say Scorsese for this one. Yeah.
Kyle Brandt
And you would get to see Borat on cocaine, which is always. I'm always into. And they could have done it in Vegas.
Bill Simmons
Yeah. Picket nits. Who was the cameraman the whole time? At one point, the cameraman gets nailed in the naked fight. He takes.
Kyle Brandt
Runs the camera guy into him.
Bill Simmons
So Somebody's done a camera. Who was it?
Kyle Brandt
I don't know.
Bill Simmons
The timeline of the road trip. We're in DC, we go to Mississippi for the Channel 16 thing, and then we go backwards to Virginia for the rodeo. Mm. It's outta sequence. It should have gone D.C. virginia, Mississippi.
Kyle Brandt
Remember? Also, when they leave at Kazakhstan, they do the Indiana Jones map thing and they do like six loops throughout Europe. I'm not sure their navigation is pristine.
Bill Simmons
Yeah, that's a good point. And then I think the bear is kind of ridiculous. That would be my one. It's not a weakest thing, but it just does. It's just weird.
Kyle Brandt
I don't care. I bet the bear. They got a big laugh in the theater when he yelled. When the bear growls at the kids and they scream. Yeah, but I'm just here for awkward moments with. With Bora. Yeah. I don't care about the bear in the ice cream truck that much. They had to make a movie. I get it. But that's not my favorite part.
Bill Simmons
Any other picking.
Kyle Brandt
It's. I just said, don't these handlers have any kind of better awareness that they're being like, absolutely hoodwinked when they agree to have Alan Keys sit down for an interview or.
Bill Simmons
I know any of those people.
Kyle Brandt
Like, those are major politicians. You probably got to go through it. And I know that they're really slick with how they pitch it and they have fake production companies and stuff. But, like, at what point when you're sitting with Alan Keys and you talk about like a rubber fist going up your anus from, like, at what point it was like, holy shit, stop this. How does it get to that?
Bill Simmons
Yeah, I mean, that's probably what happens. We just.
Kyle Brandt
And are they so mad? Like, is Alan Keys fucking firing somebody about that?
Bill Simmons
Probably, yeah, I'd be mad. Sequel, prequel, Prestige tv, All black cast are untouchable. They did a sequel. So we have our answer for that. Okay.
Kyle Brandt
Yes.
Bill Simmons
Is this movie better with Wayne Jenkins, Fergie, the Flores, Zane Lowe, Robert Evans or somebody else? What do you think, Kyle Brant?
Kyle Brandt
You know what I'd really like to do? I'd like to take the guy at the church, the let that tongue go guy who puts the hands on. And I'd like him to just do a rundown on all the rewatchables hosts and just get the shit out of them and just say, Sean fantasy. Do you really need all that physical media? Like that really need K19, the Widowmaker in 4K, Craig Orbeck? Do you not need a four hour version of The Dark Knight. Let that tong Bill Simmons. You watch Lord of the Rings every Christmas, Tongo. That's what I want.
Bill Simmons
We gotta add that guy to the list with Zade and everybody. What was that guy's name?
Kyle Brandt
Tungo guy.
Bill Simmons
I don't know what it is from Borat.
Kyle Brandt
Ben Lathan. Do you really not attracted to white women? Let that tongue go. That guy steals the show. I want him to do all of you.
Bill Simmons
That sounds great. I actually had one for this.
Kyle Brandt
What do you got?
Bill Simmons
I mean, this is really going to appeal to all of your bones.
Kyle Brandt
Oh, let's go.
Bill Simmons
What if naked Borat, naked asimat crashed the 1993 International association of Cardiologists conference in Chicago as Dr. Charles Nichols was speaking? Dr. Charles Nichols said, ladies and gentlemen, my friend Borat Sagadov doesn't feel well. We just kind of work that in.
Kyle Brandt
And he goes, I'm sorry, Azimbat, I'm in the middle of this speech. Oh, my gosh. Did you kill my wife too? Huh?
Bill Simmons
Did you falsified the research
Kyle Brandt
so you
Bill Simmons
could give them prvasek? You switch to the samples.
Kyle Brandt
Very nice. Wah wah, wee, wah. Oh, my God, that's awesome.
Bill Simmons
Yeah, thank you.
Kyle Brandt
I remember when you guys, a couple years ago, you guys did Fugitive in Chicago and you had invited me to attend it. I was so excited. My whole thing is, I'm like, Bill, I just want to walk in from the back of the audience at the end of the pod and just do a full Kimball and walk up on stage and. And just do the whole thing about, did you kill Shay Serrano too?
Bill Simmons
Huh?
Kyle Brandt
Did ya? And I just couldn't get there in time. Fuck. But that is a great inclusion of Dr. Charles Nichols. God, that's awesome.
Bill Simmons
Just one Oscar. Who gets at screenplay or would you go, Sasha Baron Cohen?
Kyle Brandt
Oh, fucking Sacha Baron Cohen, best lead actor.
Bill Simmons
Fuck it, let's do it. Unanswerable questions. We actually did the ones I had for this about whether it was Sacha Baron Cohen's poop in a bag. Did you have any other ones?
Kyle Brandt
I did Azamat wash his ball sack before the fight scene? I already asked it.
Bill Simmons
Let's ask Ken Davidian right now. Ken.
Kyle Brandt
Ken.
Bill Simmons
The secret handshake club memorabilia you'd want from this movie. What do you got?
Kyle Brandt
I was going to say the Mankini. And I know that I used to go to the beach in Santa Monica after this movie came out and there'd be guys wearing that thing just for laughs. But now, since we've been through the pod, I Want the Polaroid of his son, Huey Lewis. And I want the one holding him up with his barrel penis down there. And I just want to keep it at my desk.
Bill Simmons
I think I would want the Baywatch book.
Kyle Brandt
Oh, yeah.
Bill Simmons
The actual Baywatch book that he had. That with the little towel that he had over it to make it seem like it was the Quran.
Kyle Brandt
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
I would want that whole package with
Kyle Brandt
a red water panties. It's a great book. I like it.
Bill Simmons
Coach Finstock, Mr. Miyagi Award for best worst life Lesson. It's gotta be that frat kid, right? What does he say?
Kyle Brandt
Don't let a woman define you.
Bill Simmons
Yeah. Don't. Do not let a woman ever, ever make you who you are. Yeah. I'm gonna go.
Kyle Brandt
I have written down, I like you. I like sex. It's nice. That's all I got.
Bill Simmons
Best double feature choice. I have Best in Show and then Borat, in that order. I go Christopher Guest first. Then I go Borat. I think that's how it would have to go.
Kyle Brandt
I got Bruno. We haven't talked a lot about the Bruno movie. Yeah, really liked it. Some amazing scenes. At one point, Bruno visits like a psychic medium and he makes his Bruno's ex boyfriend who died appear. And then Bruno does a full fellatio sequence with finish. Like it's really, really graphic. And you're screaming again in the theater. I watched Bruno, which I thought was not as good as Borat, but was still funny.
Bill Simmons
Who won the movie? Sasha Baron Cohen.
Kyle Brandt
Sasha.
Bill Simmons
Well, that was easy. Borat.
Kyle Brandt
So easy.
Bill Simmons
By the way, we did this probably in almost exactly the amount of time of the movie.
Kyle Brandt
Yeah. And we have no Craig, right?
Bill Simmons
No Craig. All right, Kyle, Brent, what do you got going on as we head into the summer here?
Kyle Brandt
Oh, well, I made my maiden voyage to Bristol, Connecticut last night. Bill. I'd never been there before, but I did this. The schedule release. I went to Bristol and it's. By the way, it's bullshit. There's no mascots in the hallway. There's no nobody saying, follow me to freedom. There's none of that shit. I thought that was going to be like, this is SportsCenter. It's not like that at all. There's no Peyton giving Eli wet willies. Charlie Steiner wasn't to be seen. But I'm now squarely in the ESPN FL Network world. And it's really fun.
Bill Simmons
They got some games, right? NFL Network got a couple.
Kyle Brandt
Yeah, yeah, they kept a couple. And ESPN has a Super bowl this year. And, like, I'm doing all kinds of crazy shit, man. I'm running into people I've watched my whole life. Joe Buck and everybody on the daytime schedule. It's been awesome. Every. And I really mean this. This sounds like I'm doing. Everyone has been really nice. Bill. Everyone has been really nice. To which you say, what? Just wait.
Bill Simmons
No, I wouldn't say that.
Kyle Brandt
Good, good. Everyone's been very nice.
Bill Simmons
I'm glad they haven't. The setup's great. Your earpiece only fell out 10 times
Kyle Brandt
but now I wish showed that earpiece whose boss I figured it out like 20 minutes in. The setup is good. We got Tony Kukoc. How do you beat that?
Bill Simmons
He looks great.
Kyle Brandt
All right.
Bill Simmons
Thanks to Craig. Thanks to Cahow. Thanks to Eduardo. Thanks, Kyle. Brandt. Great to see you. I will see you next month because I know we're going to do something for next month's From Hell Month.
Kyle Brandt
Let's go. We got some ideas.
Bill Simmons
There's a couple. There's a couple of your favorites. All right. Good to see you, Kyle.
Kyle Brandt
Brant Jin.
Bill Simmons
Thank you.
Podcast: The Rewatchables (The Ringer)
Episode: ‘Borat’ With Bill Simmons and Kyle Brandt
Date: May 19, 2026
In this episode, Bill Simmons and Kyle Brandt revisit and dissect the 2006 comedy milestone Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan, celebrating it as one of the most iconic comedies of the 21st century. They examine Sacha Baron Cohen’s once-in-a-generation comedic performance, the film’s relentless envelope-pushing humor, and its lasting cultural impact—both positive and controversial. Through their signature blend of analysis, behind-the-scenes trivia, and personal stories, Simmons and Brandt underscore the reasons Borat is supremely rewatchable, discuss what has aged well (and what hasn’t), and deliver a rapid-fire rundown of the movie’s most memorable scenes and lines.
[29:33] Opening Kazakhstan Scene (“Running of the Jew”)
[31:15] Borat Annoys Peak New Yorker
[33:28] Comedic Timing with Pat Haggerty (Comedy Coach)
[34:54] Feminist Group, Channel 16 and Poop Bag
[38:44] Southern Manners Dinner Scene
[41:44] The Naked Fight—Most Unforgettable Scene (Theatre Blackout)
“Let’s walk through the butthole and balls.” — Kyle
Golden Globes Speech Reference:
| Category | Winner/Quote/Notes | |---------------------------------------------------------|------------------------------------------------------------| | Greatest “Random Line” | “Her vagine hangs like sleeve of wizard.” | | Most Uncomfortable Scene | Etiquette coach presented with nude Polaroid photos | | Most Cinematic Shot | Borat pissing in a pond as Azamat washes ([54:10]) | | Best Double Feature Recommendation | Best in Show + Borat, or Borat + Bruno | | Most 2006 Cultural Bit | iPod mini joke, Pamela autograph line, local news station | | “Let That Tongue Go” Award (scene-stealer) | The Evangelical preacher at the church scene ([46:34]) | | Most Rewatchable Scene | Tie: Dinner Table/Manners scene, Naked Fight/Chase | | Best Unanswerable Question | Did Azamat wash before the naked fight? ([59:02]) | | Best Memorabilia to Own | Borat’s mankini (Kyle), Baywatch book (Bill) |
Borat stands as a time capsule, cultural firecracker, and parade of pure, audacious physical comedy. Simmons and Brandt’s episode is both a loving tribute and a critical examination, full of rewatchable moments, quotable lines, and food for thought about how comedy—and the world—has changed in the years since. As ever, Borat prompts as many winces as it does laughs, and remains a landmark in the genre.
For more:
“I like you. I like sex. It’s nice.” — Borat