'Jaws 2’ With Bill Simmons, Chris Ryan, and Sean Fennessey

Summary

The Rewatchables: 'Jaws 2’ with Bill Simmons, Chris Ryan, and Sean Fennessey

Release Date: July 8, 2025

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Introduction

In this episode of The Rewatchables, host Bill Simmons is joined by Chris Ryan and Sean Fennessey to dive deep into the waters of Jaws 2. Together, they explore the film's enduring appeal, dissect its strengths and shortcomings, and discuss its place in the legacy of movie sequels.

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Initial Impressions and Pacing

Bill Simmons kicks off the discussion by expressing his affection for Jaws 2 despite its pacing issues:

Bill Simmons (02:12): "I love this movie. The first hour is pretty rough. It's slow."

The trio acknowledges that while the movie starts sluggishly, it gains momentum as it progresses, reminiscent of blending the first 80 minutes of Die Hard with a Vengeance into the latter half of Jaws 2.

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Character Development and Acting Performances

Chief Martin Brody

A major point of discussion revolves around Chief Brody's character development:

Sean Fennessey (05:07): "Brody was afraid of the water. And then he had the most traumatic experience... And then he's like, I think I'll stay near the water. Like, what the fuck?"

The hosts critique Brody's inconsistent motivations, questioning why a traumatized man would choose to remain in a perilous environment.

Mayor Larry Vaughn Jr.

The portrayal of Mayor Larry Vaughn Jr. sparks debate about political dynamics in the film:

Sean Fennessey (56:19): "This is a slasher teen movie. It's a PTSD damaged hero movie... it's a shark movie. And I think [Jaws 2] kind of invents it."

They delve into the mayor's compartmentalization and his relationship with Brody, suggesting political undertones and character flaws.

Roy Scheider's Performance

Roy Scheider's portrayal is scrutinized for its subdued and almost resentful demeanor:

Bill Simmons (07:48): "You can kind of feel it in some of the scenes where he's just like, put the cue card right there."

The discussion highlights how Scheider's off-screen reluctance translated into his on-screen performance, adding a layer of complexity to Brody's character.

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Memorable Scenes and Shark Kills

Gasoline Scene

One of the most praised scenes involves a woman using gasoline to fend off the shark:

Sean Fennessey (31:46): "It's like, my favorite thing in the movie. I love that so much."

This inventive and dramatic moment stands out as a testament to creative problem-solving in dire situations.

Eddie's Demise

Eddie's tragic end is another focal point:

Chris Ryan (40:03): "Most rewatchable. I think Eddie getting eaten is the best scene."

The hosts reflect on the emotional impact and execution of this pivotal moment.

Electric Cable Ending

The climactic confrontation with the shark using electric cables is analyzed for its ingenuity:

Bill Simmons (39:03): "He's like, they're also attracted to hot girls. Most rewatchable."

The scene is lauded for its creative approach, despite some scientific implausibilities.

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Plot and Storytelling Critiques

Inconsistencies and Plot Holes

Several plot inconsistencies are highlighted, such as Brody's decision to stay in Amity despite his PTSD and the bewildering choice to leave a 10-year-old child unattended during a shark attack.

Bill Simmons (38:44): "They left him behind."

The discussion questions the logical coherence of these decisions and their impact on character credibility.

Director and Production Challenges

The shift from director John D. Hancock to a TV director introduces further complications:

Sean Fennessey (06:27): "They decided not to put that in the movie. Probably a good idea."

The hosts explore how these changes affected the film's narrative flow and overall quality.

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Impact on Sequels and the Film Industry

Setting the Template for Horror Sequels

Jaws 2 is credited with laying the groundwork for future horror sequels, blending familiar elements with new plotlines.

Sean Fennessey (03:21): "This movie... kind of invents it."

The hosts argue that its commercial success, despite mixed reviews, encouraged the proliferation of similar sequel productions.

Comparison to Other Sequel Films

Comparisons are made with other franchises like Halloween and Damien Omen, discussing how Jaws 2 influenced their development.

Sean Fennessey (12:26): "Anybody should review all of the top sequels."

This section underscores the film's role in shaping sequel dynamics in Hollywood.

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Casting What-ifs and Hot Takes

Alternative Casting Choices

Speculative casting discussions include:

Bill Simmons: "What if Roy Scheider was in Deer Hunter?"

These hypotheticals explore how different actors could have altered the film's reception and legacy.

Lack of Diversity

A critical take on the film's homogeneous cast leads to broader conversations about representation in 1970s cinema.

Sean Fennessey (52:34): "Why are there no minorities in Amity at all?"

This highlights the film's dated approach to diversity, contrasting it with contemporary standards.

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Legacy and Final Thoughts

Despite its flaws, Jaws 2 holds a place in cinematic history as a foundational sequel that influenced the horror genre.

Sean Fennessey (62:06): "This movie... made sequels more about capitalizing on the original's success than delivering quality storytelling."

The hosts conclude by acknowledging the film's mixed legacy, balancing its commercial triumph with critical shortcomings.

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Notable Quotes

• Bill Simmons (02:12): "I love this movie. The first hour is pretty rough. It's slow."
• Sean Fennessey (03:21): "This movie... kind of invents it."
• Chris Ryan (40:03): "Most rewatchable. I think Eddie getting eaten is the best scene."
• Sean Fennessey (31:46): "It's like, my favorite thing in the movie. I love that so much."

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Key Takeaways

• Influence on Sequels: Jaws 2 played a pivotal role in defining the trajectory of movie sequels, especially within the horror genre.
• Memorable Moments: Despite pacing issues, the film boasts several standout scenes that contribute to its rewatchable status.
• Character and Plot Flaws: Inconsistent character motivations and plot holes detract from the film's overall coherence.
• Production Hurdles: Direction changes and off-screen tensions impacted the final product, affecting performances and storytelling.
• Legacy of Representation: The film's lack of diversity reflects the era's norms but stands in contrast to today's inclusive standards.

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Conclusion

Jaws 2 remains a topic of fascination for movie enthusiasts, blending nostalgia with critical analysis. While it may not achieve the legendary status of its predecessor, its role in shaping the sequel landscape is undeniable. This episode of The Rewatchables offers a comprehensive look at what makes Jaws 2 both beloved and criticized, providing valuable insights for both longtime fans and newcomers alike.

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Transcript

[Bill Simmons]

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[Chris Ryan]

Yep.

[Bill Simmons]

With CR back from the Pacific Northwest.

[Chris Ryan]

Here I am, Bigfoot, turned in to.

[Bill Simmons]

Do a little Jaws 2. Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the water. Genius tagline. We're gonna take a break. Jaws 2 next.

[Sean Fennessey]

The Legend continues, but no one sees it.

[Bill Simmons]

Chief Brody.

[Sean Fennessey]

The legend continues, but no one believes it.

[Chris Ryan]

That's a shark. And I know what a shark looks like because I've seen one up. And you better do something about this one because I don't intend to go.

[Bill Simmons]

Through that hell again. The legend continues. The All New Jaws 2. This episode of the Rewatchable is presented by Holiday Inn by ihg. It's a new day for a new stay at Holiday Inn for business travelers. Do you count as a business traveler, Sean?

[Sean Fennessey]

Sure. Sometimes.

[Bill Simmons]

Okay. With modern spaces for meeting and working, plus delicious dining for breakfast, happy hour. Do you eat breakfast, Sean?

[Sean Fennessey]

I do. I had an apple and a breakfast bar this morning.

[Bill Simmons]

Oh, interesting. I don't need any breakfast, but I do love happy hour and dinner. They have that too. You have everything you need to get your work done. Give your everyday business travel and upgrade. Book your next business trip at Holiday Inn by IHG. Visit holidayin.com to book your stay. Jaws 2 Circling this for a while. I for some reason own this as a 4K Blu Ray.

[Sean Fennessey]

Nice.

[Bill Simmons]

I love this movie. The first hour is pretty rough. It's slow. I'd use the word slow.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yep. Yep.

[Bill Simmons]

And then it becomes amazing. I think we did Die Hard with a Vengeance a couple weeks ago. If you took the first 80 minutes of die Hard with a Vengeance and then merged it into the last 45 minutes of Josh, that'd be a really amusing film.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah. If they go out to Far Rockaway and there's shark attacks happening and that's the final.

[Sean Fennessey]

Simon, put that sandwich board on that shark. See what happens in Harlem. You know, that'd be quite a scene.

[Chris Ryan]

That'S a way to connect it to New York months.

[Bill Simmons]

This movie ultimately gets there as a sequel. I really, fully, completely support the last 45 years.

[Sean Fennessey]

There's just some awesome shark kills, and that's kind of what you need. The shark kills are awesome in this movie.

[Bill Simmons]

There's a couple.

[Chris Ryan]

Whoa.

[Bill Simmons]

I can't believe they did that.

[Chris Ryan]

In the background, Dazed and Confused is happening.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yes.

[Bill Simmons]

So good. I think it's four movies. This is what I wrote down. It's a slasher teen movie. It's a PTSD damaged hero movie. It's a late 70s teenage beach hangout sailing movie. And then it's a shark movie.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

What's your favorite out of those four?

[Chris Ryan]

I think probably the slasher monster movie side of it. Like the idea that this shark is just marauding around and thinking of new creative ways to kill teenagers.

[Bill Simmons]

It's basically Myers. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

Just three months before Michael Myers. Right. This is like, this is the true forerunner to what horror movies would be for the next 10 years. It kind of invents it.

[Bill Simmons]

There's a little teenagers in peril.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yes.

[Chris Ryan]

There's a little bit of a detective movie too, because for about 40 minutes, Brody's like, what could be causing these weird disappearances in the water? I have a bad feeling about this. But, you know, developing the film, all the stuff that he has to do.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

I have a fifth movie. It's also, I think, a Sorkin esque portrait of a local politician having a breakdown. Whatever is going on with the mayor in this movie I'd like to spend an hour on.

[Bill Simmons]

Well, I have a spot in the pod. So you think this created the West Wing?

[Sean Fennessey]

It feels like it. You know, like a man who has to go before the public and continue to deny the truth.

[Chris Ryan]

Yes.

[Sean Fennessey]

Every day of his life.

[Chris Ryan]

Who's turned over the keys to Amity to real estate developers.

[Bill Simmons]

Somehow he's grooming his son, Larry von Jr. Hey, Larry. Me, my son, Larry, Larry Jr.

[Chris Ryan]

Do.

[Bill Simmons]

You want to do. We probably did this in the first Jaws movie, but the Amity, Cape Cod, Long island, whatever is going on here.

[Sean Fennessey]

I mean, shot in the Vineyard. Right. But I guess it's supposed to be Long Island. Isn't that the idea?

[Bill Simmons]

But then mostly shot in Florida.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

It's just. It's trying to do a whole bunch of things.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

I. It's a familiar milieu. You know, my dad lived on the beach when I was a kid and so I was always going to these communities.

[Chris Ryan]

But he was not a beach cop. Did he ever have Any aspirations or ambitions to become a Martin Brody esque?

[Bill Simmons]

Seems like a great job.

[Sean Fennessey]

Well, I have some questions about that, actually, regarding what Brody's been up to in the three years since the original shark attack and why he was the.

[Bill Simmons]

Man of the Year in Amity.

[Chris Ryan]

It sounds like. Doesn't he make a reference to, like, four things happen a year? It's like I make four arrests a year or something like that.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah, man, I have so much to say about this. But, like, Brody was afraid of the water. And then he had the most traumatic experience you could ever have on the water. And then he's like, I think I'll stay near the water. Like, what the fuck?

[Bill Simmons]

This guy. I'm gonna drive my jeep right on the beach.

[Sean Fennessey]

Just like move to Glen Cove or something. You don't have to be in a beach town. It's okay.

[Bill Simmons]

Right? Well, it's like what we talked about with Diary of the Vengeance also. Killing the shark probably sets up some amazing side career for him, like where he could write a book and. Yeah, he go on talk shows.

[Sean Fennessey]

Do Dick Cabot, like a harpoon sponsorship or something.

[Chris Ryan]

I have to start asking hard questions about whether Brody was participating in a slush fund scheme with Mayor Larry.

[Sean Fennessey]

It's true.

[Chris Ryan]

You know, whether he was.

[Bill Simmons]

You want to do this now?

[Chris Ryan]

Getting a little wet in his beak. A little.

[Bill Simmons]

There's some beak wetting.

[Sean Fennessey]

Something is fishy.

[Chris Ryan]

You think Ellen Brody's really bringing in the money? Being like the. The town salesman for that real estate developer?

[Bill Simmons]

Well, there's some. I guess a deleted scene that insinuates that Brody gets. I decided not to watch the deleted scenes because 2 hours plus of Jaws 2 is enough. Plus, I watched the entire making of documentary, which I'm excited to talk about, but apparently they hint at some Brody's wife with the boss. Like some sort of, like, romantic maybe. Yeah. That Brody gets. Been out of shape about. And they smartly took that out of the movie because that would have been idiotic disrespect.

[Chris Ryan]

Martin Brody like that.

[Sean Fennessey]

Well, is the implication that, you know, if Ellen is polishing Len's knob, then she's getting like, a Christmas bonus? Like, what's happening? Like, what is really. What's the quid pro quo there? He's the chief of police.

[Chris Ryan]

It would have been better if Martin was boring the shit out of her. Telling old war stories about fighting Jaws with Hooper and just being like, man, I remember that time in 74 when I killed that fucking shit shark. She's just like, all right, we can Move on from this.

[Sean Fennessey]

You know, why does Ellen even need a job as a glorified secretary for Len? You know, like, I. This doesn't.

[Chris Ryan]

She's a career woman. It's the late 70s. Women are in the workplace. What the fuck is wrong with you?

[Bill Simmons]

Were they in the workplace?

[Sean Fennessey]

It doesn't really seem like it. Yeah. This guy's like wandering on the beach in a four piece.

[Chris Ryan]

They're not doing any parenting, so they have plenty of time to dedicate your professions.

[Bill Simmons]

I mean, the bigger question. Martin Brody. Good hang.

[Chris Ryan]

My kind of hang. My kind of hang.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

Three cigarettes before shows home that it's.

[Bill Simmons]

Like you're not sure how drunk he is when dad gets home. Yeah. Is dad really drunk or kind of drunk? Oh, the car sideways in the garage.

[Sean Fennessey]

Scheider is just the shade of an heirloom tomato the whole movie. It's incredible.

[Bill Simmons]

Well, there's great research about how he kind of didn't want to be in the movie, which we'll get to. But apparently he was surly for like the first half of the filming, basically, which I thought was hilarious.

[Sean Fennessey]

Fits the character very well.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah, you can kind of feel it in some of the scenes where he's just like, put the cue card right there so I can see it. Let's get this done.

[Chris Ryan]

He's still Roy Schneider, though. I mean, honestly, it's like whether he's reading off cue cards, whether or not he hated being there. Like, there's a couple of scenes in there where you're just like, this guy's the fucking best.

[Bill Simmons]

Well, we do this every time. We do shatter, but we got to go through his 70s clute. French connection. Jaws marathon man. Sorcerer. Jaws to all that jazz. Just ripping them off.

[Sean Fennessey]

Sneaky Scheider month here on the show.

[Chris Ryan]

It is a Sneaky Scheider. We can do all that next.

[Bill Simmons]

It's. It's the summer of Scheider July.

[Sean Fennessey]

Sounds good.

[Chris Ryan]

Well, we've already done the good shiny.

[Sean Fennessey]

What are we doing? Blue Thunder, you know?

[Bill Simmons]

Well, we have Sorcerers still lingering.

[Chris Ryan]

Sorcerer and all that Jazz just came.

[Bill Simmons]

Out on Blu Ray.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah, it did.

[Bill Simmons]

Did you get that one?

[Sean Fennessey]

I certainly did.

[Bill Simmons]

How was it?

[Sean Fennessey]

It's really good. I'm. I'm. I'm featured on it. I don't know if you know.

[Chris Ryan]

What do you mean?

[Sean Fennessey]

I. I interviewed James Gray on that Blu Ray talking about Sorcerer.

[Bill Simmons]

Really?

[Craig Horlbeck]

Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

Wow, that's really exciting.

[Sean Fennessey]

It really is.

[Bill Simmons]

Congratulations.

[Sean Fennessey]

Thank you.

[Chris Ryan]

Yes.

[Sean Fennessey]

It was very cool. It was very fun to do.

[Bill Simmons]

Got to get it now. Yeah, I saw the Criterion Collection was on sale for 50% off.

[Chris Ryan]

It's a great time for sales right out there.

[Sean Fennessey]

It really is. I mean, all that Jazz is also in the Criterion Collection, right?

[Chris Ryan]

Cop it already.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

Loves that one. Who was supposed to be in all that Jazz? Oh, Dreyfus.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah. Well, Dreyfus is in this.

[Chris Ryan]

There's a lot of swapping of great big movies and great big parts. I can't wait to talk about that.

[Bill Simmons]

Well, sequels dive into this because Damien Omen 2, good movie.

[Chris Ryan]

Just got stretched by the bucks.

[Sean Fennessey]

You always say it like there's not a colon in the title.

[Bill Simmons]

Damian Omen 2.

[Sean Fennessey]

That's it.

[Bill Simmons]

I call Damien Omen 2.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

Damien. Was his last name Omen or was it a different last name?

[Chris Ryan]

Oh, it's not Omen.

[Sean Fennessey]

No, it's Omen. It's Omen.

[Chris Ryan]

His father, Bob oman.

[Bill Simmons]

Damian Omen 2.

[Chris Ryan]

Bob Omen, the first.

[Bill Simmons]

Jaws 2. Both June 1978. So why is this important? Well, we're starting a sequel. Boom. They didn't really do sequels. They did Bond sequels. They did those weird airport movies that they put the year of the. Whatever.

[Sean Fennessey]

77. Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

Clint Eastwood's westerns were sort of sequels. Go back to the 20s, 30s, 40s. They love doing sequels. Then it kind of died off. 1977.

[Chris Ryan]

I see you just threw a little chum in the water for Roso. Talking forties.

[Bill Simmons]

Right? Well, we. Now we know.

[Chris Ryan]

Get Rossillo on a. On a Thin man pod.

[Sean Fennessey]

I'm. I'm desperate.

[Chris Ryan]

I.

[Sean Fennessey]

He said he wanted it to be the three of us, but I need you and Ryan looking each other in the eye doing costume talking for two hours. I need it. I need it more than I need anything in the world.

[Bill Simmons]

All right, we'll do it.

[Chris Ryan]

Seriously, I would retire from the rewatch you guys did that. It would be like we've completed the Mission.

[Bill Simmons]

77 has Exorcist 2, Bad News Bears, and Breaking Training, a phenomenal movie. And Airport. 77. 78 has Jaws 2, Omen 2, Bad News Bears 3. Go to Japan. We don't acknowledge that.

[Sean Fennessey]

Also Revenge of the Pink Panther, one of the biggest of the year.

[Bill Simmons]

79 has Rocky 2, which becomes as. As big of a phenomenon as Jaws 2. And we also get Airport 79, Butch and Sundance prequel, and more American graffiti. And then 80 has Empire Strikes Back, Smokey and the Bandit 2. So these are top 10 movies that are sequels. And then you can just see how it changes where Superman 2, Halloween 2, Friday 132 in 1982. Here are all the sequels. Rocky 3 Star Trek 2, Friday 13, 3, Airplane 2, Halloween 3, Death Wish 2, Grease 2, Amityville 2 and Penitentiary 2. If you just go by the year, there's just normal movie titles. Like, you look at, like, 1975, and it's just movie titles. And then you get to, like, the 80s, you see two sequels, whatever, and then it just changes.

[Chris Ryan]

Do you find it comforting or alarming that for your entire life, like, that's been the case? Like, because in some ways it should give us a little bit of peace when it's like, oh, there's nothing original anymore.

[Sean Fennessey]

But I don't think there's anything that is inherently bad about a sequel. I think, you know, the Empire Strikes Back is remarkable. Like, it's one of the best movies ever. Godfather II is one of the best movies ever. I do think that there's a consistency in the ones that you talked about from 77 through 80, where the number twos are basically the same as the first film, but worse. And money grabs, and they're only made for money. But, like, the structure of the movie is usually the same. The director is usually a little less good than the director of the original.

[Bill Simmons]

There's usually at least one star missing.

[Sean Fennessey]

Somebody doesn't show up. The lead is usually a little bit more begrudging about having to do the movie. They don't feel as happy about it.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

So you just. It's just not as.

[Chris Ryan]

There's a lot more hand wringing in the stories about the. The making of these movies. There's a lot more hand wringing about. Like, we were waiting for a script that honored the first one or they could live up to the first one. We don't have that problem anymore.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah.

[Chris Ryan]

Like, we're like, get these going.

[Bill Simmons]

You know, halfway through the movie, they're like, yeah, just have them shoot the blue fish and let's get to the next scene.

[Chris Ryan]

Ana de Armas is the ballerina, and she is John Wick. Like, let's not worry about this too much.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah.

[Chris Ryan]

But it was. It was fascinating to see that the Jaws producers basically did this because they were like, we don't. This is going to happen anyway. So better to be involved and try and make it, you know, on the level of the first one.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah. Somebody's doing a shark movie if we don't.

[Sean Fennessey]

That's what David Brown said. Do you believe that or do you believe that that was a way to meddle?

[Chris Ryan]

I believe Universal was. Would make another Jaws movie, don't you? I mean, it's like a groundbreaking box Office success in that way.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah, it's possible.

[Bill Simmons]

I just think just. We've talked about this a bunch of times this year, especially the Star wars pod. I just think this is right around. Movies change and they. They look at a movie like Jaws or Star wars and they're just like, just. Let's run that back. Let's do that again. I saw Jaws 2 in the theater. It was another one at the Cleveland Circle Theater.

[Chris Ryan]

There you go.

[Bill Simmons]

My dad took me. I was the exact same age, I think, as little Sean, and super scared the last hour of the movie. Like, really genuinely scared. The hell. I vividly remember the helicopter thing being like. That was like, one of the craziest things I've seen in a movie theater.

[Sean Fennessey]

It's still really effective.

[Bill Simmons]

It's really great.

[Sean Fennessey]

There are still a few things in this that are really good.

[Bill Simmons]

And then fucking Marge just getting swallowed up by. By Jaws Jr. That's killing the movie.

[Chris Ryan]

I have. I have a. I may have a contender for that. Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

Also a. Holy shit.

[Sean Fennessey]

I've never seen that shot from behind.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah. And it's a great invention because you don't have to show her getting quinted. You know, she just disappears.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah. Well, they. It seemed like they were really worried about the R, so they didn't. They had a couple of crunching down things that they ended up cutting out. But this was a moment when this came out and this movie did really, really well. And I think it's one of the reasons we started getting more sequels. This movie fucking killed it. The box office. And it didn't matter if it wasn't as good.

[Sean Fennessey]

And it kind of got killed critically. Right. Like, it was not well reviewed at all.

[Chris Ryan]

It was not.

[Sean Fennessey]

It didn't matter at all.

[Chris Ryan]

But also then became a absolute staple of early hbo. I remember this being on a ton when I was a kid.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah.

[Chris Ryan]

All the Jaw sequels were. But it's been in a weird way, like, I wonder sometimes if I've seen Jaws 2 more than Jaws, just cumulatively, you know, because every time I watch Jaws, I make a big, like, thing out of it.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah.

[Chris Ryan]

And with this, it's like, oh, yeah. Oh, the water skiing. Like, I'll sit down for this. You know, it's.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah. From a. From. We always talk about why we created the pod. This is a classic. Oh, they're going sailing. Eddie's about to get it. Eddie's about to die. I'm gonna stick for another 40 here. Poor Eddie. All you want to do is play the guitar on the beach and get laid.

[Chris Ryan]

Come on, Tina. Just don't make it so tough on a guy.

[Sean Fennessey]

You know, I get the impression that he kind of put a lot of numbers up with Tina in the first place. Like he actually. Maybe he lived a good life.

[Chris Ryan]

Oh, I feel like Tina was undiagnosed ADHD and kept being like, is that a parasailer?

[Sean Fennessey]

Am I gonna get out of here?

[Bill Simmons]

You know, what was she saying about she needed a blanket cuz her mom noticed the black and blue bruises?

[Chris Ryan]

Oh yeah. Cuz they kept.

[Sean Fennessey]

They were knocking it out on the boat.

[Bill Simmons]

No, I get it.

[Chris Ryan]

American cars in the 70s. A lot of sharp edges, you know.

[Bill Simmons]

What were her parents inspector when she got home like?

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah, time for your ass inspection. Tina.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

You've been out with Eddie all night.

[Chris Ryan]

Oh, I was balling Eddie in the back of the station wagon.

[Bill Simmons]

Also on a boat. And that boat that size. Not easy.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah, yeah.

[Chris Ryan]

Wish we had gotten to see it.

[Bill Simmons]

Eddie's got to be a very tender lover. Well, he was a guitar player.

[Sean Fennessey]

What do you think their favorite position was?

[Bill Simmons]

I'd probably very.

[Chris Ryan]

Careful.

[Bill Simmons]

Careful lover. Well, by the time we got to 1983, here were the sequels. Return of the Jedi, Superman 3, Awful Jaws 3, Horrible Psycho 2, Horrific Porsche 2, A Disgrace, the Sting 2 Never Happened, and Smokey the Bandit 3. We literally went over.

[Chris Ryan]

Do you like Smokey 3? Didn't put a little review on the end of it.

[Bill Simmons]

I'm not positive Burt Reynolds is in it.

[Sean Fennessey]

I kind of like Psycho too. I'm just gonna put that out there.

[Bill Simmons]

Really?

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah, I think. And I think there is a cult to that movie now.

[Bill Simmons]

What?

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah, it's like a late stage. Anthony Perkins appreciation. Interesting. I forgot the director's name. Australian guy who made Patrick and Road Games couple like gnarly. I think it's like some good kills in it. I like Psycho too.

[Bill Simmons]

Pork is too. Saw that in the theater. Has some of the worst sports scene footage in the history. I don't even know if I'd seen basketball. Okay, meet the. The. He's like a power forward. I'll bet remember me meets 35 in real life at this point playing power forward in the high school team and does not know how to play basketball. And if there's video of it, we could easily cut this into a social clip like he is. I had never probably touched any sort of sports object before this movie. And he's just running around like even the fat kid in Teen Wolf was better. Chubby. Chubby at least looked like he had a little bit of an Oliver Miller.

[Chris Ryan]

Type Was there a team? There was a Teen Wolf too, wasn't there?

[Bill Simmons]

Oh, there was, yeah.

[Chris Ryan]

Oh, right. So I want to.

[Bill Simmons]

Before he became Jason Batman.

[Chris Ryan]

That's right.

[Bill Simmons]

Whatever that is.

[Chris Ryan]

In the. In the Ryan household, I will say, weirdly, maybe uniquely, just the Revenge is. Is our favorite, the fourth one sequel. Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

That's Michael Keane.

[Chris Ryan]

Yes.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah.

[Chris Ryan]

And Mario Van Peebles.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yes, it is. That's the Jamaican one.

[Bill Simmons]

I don't know if I, you know that one more than once. What happens?

[Chris Ryan]

Sean gets. He's like a harbor master and he gets killed by a shark outside of Amity.

[Sean Fennessey]

It is the Revenge.

[Bill Simmons]

Sean Brody.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

It is the revenge on Martin Brody.

[Chris Ryan]

Yes. That is why Brody's passed away from a heart attack. Surprise, surprise.

[Bill Simmons]

Four packs of dancing cigarettes finally got him out.

[Chris Ryan]

And then Sean is like, you know, following in his father's footsteps. Gets his arm bitten off and dragged out to the water. Ellen freaks out. Michael comes from his job in the Bahamas and is like, ellen, you got to come down the Bahamas with me. You know, you got to soothe your soul. She meets. I can't remember what Michael Caine's character's name is like woegie or something like that.

[Sean Fennessey]

Hoagie Newcomb.

[Chris Ryan]

Hoagie Newcomb, played by Michael Caine. And then I think Mario Van Peebles is like a dive master there. And then.

[Bill Simmons]

Say no more. I'll dial it up on to Be Tonight.

[Chris Ryan]

They do battle with the shark. It's pretty awesome.

[Sean Fennessey]

Three is the water park.

[Chris Ryan]

Yes.

[Bill Simmons]

That was 3D World. That was during the weird 3D era.

[Chris Ryan]

And Quaid.

[Bill Simmons]

It's bad.

[Sean Fennessey]

Really bad.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah. All those 3D movies, they didn't really.

[Sean Fennessey]

Know that was a sterling defense of Jaws, the revenge. But it's very bad, as I recall.

[Bill Simmons]

I've seen all. I've only seen those one each. Well, Lorraine Gary is in all four, right?

[Sean Fennessey]

Yes, she is.

[Bill Simmons]

Yes. Which is hilarious because she was married to the head of Universal. Yes. And if you look at her IMDb, I think we did this when we did Jaws, but basically a TV actress and a couple things and then ends up in Spielberg's Jaws is like the wife of the hero.

[Chris Ryan]

That being said, I. I kind of like her.

[Bill Simmons]

She's fine.

[Sean Fennessey]

I said this on the Jaws pod. I think she's really good in Jaws, the first Jaws. I'm a little confused about her career path in Jaws 2. And then by Jaws 4, she's like a traumatized woman.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah. She is the hero. 65 year old hero. Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

So it's a little questionable.

[Bill Simmons]

So you don't think the Lakers should have drafted her in the second round.

[Chris Ryan]

Can she finish Lobs? We don't know.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah. So she's the only thread for the four. Well, they decided to do the sequel late in 75. Spielberg said, no, thanks anyway. There was some writer they brought in and wanted to do a prequel about Quint's story about the U.S. indianapolis.

[Chris Ryan]

No, this is. You gotta slow down here.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah, I wanted to just clear the floor for this.

[Chris Ryan]

The original sort of creative team of. Of Jaws when they were like, we got to do a sequel. And I think even there's some reporting that Spielberg was like, that's actually a cool idea. Or maybe that was his idea, but Carl Gottlieb was writing it or something. Was the Quint prequel, the USS Indianapolis prequel that he tells the story of in Jaws. I'm in and I'm in. And I think we may have talked about this on the Jaws pod, but, like, if Jaws had just been an anthology series about shark. Shark attacks in different parts of the world or in some connective tissue with the characters, it would have been like the greatest franchise ever. And I bet Spielberg would have been interested enough to come back if it wasn't like Martin Brody does battle with the shark again.

[Bill Simmons]

Well, they've ripped us. I mean, open water. Remember that one?

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah, of course.

[Bill Simmons]

The Blake Lively movie.

[Chris Ryan]

Shallows.

[Bill Simmons]

They just. They make deep blue sea. Like they just keep making shark. They've been making them for 50 years.

[Sean Fennessey]

But there was also a wave in the immediate aftermath of this movie of. Of sea creature related movies. Like, you also had orca immediately after this. You had crocodile. You had alligator. You had. Or eaten alive is the crocodile movie. And then you had alligator. You had piranha, the Joe Dante movie. Like, they. There was a wave of literally this.

[Bill Simmons]

I don't mind. The piranha's pretty cool.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

Tough way to go.

[Chris Ryan]

I. Is it true that. Yeah. Is it different piranhas? Are they actually not that dangerous?

[Sean Fennessey]

Shark or piranha? Sheesh.

[Bill Simmons]

No. I think if there's a lot of piranha, you just. Your body, you just get shredded. Yeah. It's like a water crema.

[Chris Ryan]

I think I'll go.

[Craig Horlbeck]

I feel like you got a better chance against a shark, weirdly.

[Bill Simmons]

Ah.

[Chris Ryan]

I mean, I feel like I've watched more shark movies than piranha movies, so I have some ideas about how to combat.

[Sean Fennessey]

What movies did I just watch where somebody punches a shark and it works. This just happened in a movie.

[Chris Ryan]

Dangerous animals.

[Sean Fennessey]

That's what it was.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yes. You know about dangerous animals is out right now. Jai Courtney. Yeah, he plays a crazed Australian boat captain who takes people out to see the sharks.

[Chris Ryan]

But then he, like, he takes women.

[Sean Fennessey]

Out, abducts them, and makes them shark bait for his amusement.

[Chris Ryan]

And he videotapes them while they're hanging off.

[Bill Simmons]

This is a movie that's in the theater.

[Sean Fennessey]

It's out right now. Like, yeah, it's going to be on Shutter this summer.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah. Oh, it's pretty dark. Even as shark movies go, it's like, holy shit. Like, this guy's just torturing women for two hours.

[Sean Fennessey]

But yeah, it's like Saw, but just for sharks.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah, it's Saw, but sharks.

[Bill Simmons]

Well, but that description Saw, but that's the, that was what you laid out, that model. That's what Jaws could have been. There was just like a new Jaws every year. Yeah, they didn't know how to franchise stuff back then. They had to actually, like, really put thought and money into it.

[Sean Fennessey]

I think that that would have been cool. But, like, let's not forget that the first movie is directed by Steven Spielberg. Like, that's the reason Jaws is amazing. And you really feel it watching Jaws too, which is a very fun summer blockbuster movie, but it is no Jaws. It's not even close to the propulsive feeling that you get watching Jaws where you're kind of like when you're watching Jaws, you're like this the whole time, getting leaning closer and closer to see what happens in this movie. I'm just like, I'm waiting for the kill. That's the thing. And I don't even really think about the kills as much when I think of Jaws in this movie.

[Chris Ryan]

It's all kills.

[Sean Fennessey]

It's a machine.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

Very similar to Halloween 2, a movie that I support.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah, same thing.

[Bill Simmons]

It's Myers just like, let's get his stats up. Like, his PR in Halloween 2 is just way better. He only has like four kills in Halloween 1.

[Sean Fennessey]

He's Jordan Clarkson.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

He's taken down like an entire hospital. Anyway, they found a director. They start doing a script that's in the future. John D. Hancock.

[Sean Fennessey]

Interesting director.

[Chris Ryan]

Theater director, TV director.

[Bill Simmons]

They banged the drum. Slowly.

[Chris Ryan]

Yes.

[Sean Fennessey]

Before that, he did a really good horror movie called let's Scare Jessica to Death, which features great stuff on the water.

[Bill Simmons]

Are you on that 4K Blu Ray.

[Sean Fennessey]

Or no, I'm not on that one. But there is a really good addition to that.

[Chris Ryan]

He's saving it all for the dangerous animals vinegar syndrome.

[Sean Fennessey]

Put out a really good version of that. I, I, this is a Little bit of a what if for me is if. If they hadn't fired John D. Hancock off the movie. He's a better director than Jano Schwarz, the TV director.

[Chris Ryan]

In the reporting. Or the stuff about the making the movie is that his version of Jaws 2 was like a more of like a darker drama. So I wonder if that's more of the first half of the film.

[Bill Simmons]

There was that. Plus didn't the. He was kind of trying to cut back the wife's parts in the Universal guy. That was the story he told.

[Sean Fennessey]

And he blamed this on Shark not working. Which is obviously the same line that Spielberg had. He was like. He basically got fired because he couldn't get the action sequences to play. They weren't cutting together. And David Brown was like. This guy is. We made the wrong choice.

[Bill Simmons]

Production stops. Stops long enough that Spielberg thinks about it.

[Chris Ryan]

They also thought about the.

[Bill Simmons]

And he writes the screenplay for the Quint speech.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

Just for fun. Because he was a fucking freak. And then we're going to write this whole movie.

[Chris Ryan]

Maybe it was going to maybe be directed by Joe alves, who did 3D. Right. And Verna Fields who edited one and became like a executive at Universal. But the DJ wouldn't let him do it.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah.

[Chris Ryan]

You can't replace.

[Bill Simmons]

I didn't know about that. There was some rule that. From Outlaw of Josie Wales. They fired the director and then had the crew direct the rest of the movie.

[Chris Ryan]

It's kind of like what happened on Tombstone. Right.

[Bill Simmons]

And the DJ was like, we're not doing that anymore. But then the DJ was like 10 rewatchables where that's happened.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah. The DGA had the second apron.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah. To trade. Poor Zingus.

[Sean Fennessey]

I don't know if that's a tall tale from Joe Alves or not.

[Chris Ryan]

I like it.

[Sean Fennessey]

He says that. But it's a good story.

[Bill Simmons]

So they end up with Jenna Swerk.

[Chris Ryan]

I was. I had so many different variations on how you were going to pronounce this that I didn't even bother to look up the real one because I was so excited.

[Bill Simmons]

It's one of the weirdest names I've seen in the IMDb. There's. His last name is spelled SCW A R C. I don't.

[Chris Ryan]

It's called Gene. Keep it moving.

[Craig Horlbeck]

It's borderline Shark.

[Chris Ryan]

It's pretty close.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah, Sure.

[Sean Fennessey]

I just love to get three consonants in a row in the last. Yeah. You know, just right to start. Schwar.

[Bill Simmons]

Well, you got it here.

[Craig Horlbeck]

I got three consonants in a row.

[Sean Fennessey]

My last name you do?

[Chris Ryan]

Oh, yeah.

[Craig Horlbeck]

H O R L B. Oh, yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

Congrats.

[Chris Ryan]

Thanks.

[Bill Simmons]

Jano Schwerk.

[Sean Fennessey]

Jeanno.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

Ten years later, he's doing episode eight of Hill Street Blues, season four.

[Chris Ryan]

Not bad. Yeah.

[Craig Horlbeck]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

He seems like a very affable man.

[Bill Simmons]

In the interview, you know, like a Roy Scheider.

[Sean Fennessey]

Didn't like him at all.

[Bill Simmons]

We did have one. One star come back. The Goat John Williams.

[Chris Ryan]

Yes.

[Bill Simmons]

They're like, hey, John, can you kick in a little teenage kid having fun? Like fun happy. We might have an orgy at the Lighthouse. Music. Jdubs is like, I got that.

[Chris Ryan]

Jdubs has got one hand on the Close Encounters theme and another one just.

[Bill Simmons]

Remixes rocking to it.

[Sean Fennessey]

That's the thing is like in 1978 he also scored the Fury, the Brian De Palma movie, and Superman the movie, which is one of the most iconic themes in movie history. And he was like, yeah, I got time for Jaws too.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah. And he's working on Empire.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah, he's got empire. He's got 1941 coming in 79 and Empire coming in 80. He cooked.

[Bill Simmons]

Only. Only Harold Fartemire is the only one who can match him. They'll be serious when Beverly Hills Cop and Fletch and Top Gun and Beverly Hills Cop too. That little run Harold had. No John Williams.

[Chris Ryan]

No, no, he's not a Zimmer.

[Bill Simmons]

But we still. Same thing. How did he do it? Who's the guy in Miami Vice? Jan Hammer. Yeah, that was another one. It's like Jan's just cranking it for two years. Cranking, Cranking music.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

The synthesizer.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

Anyway, the Goat John Williams is back. $20 million budget made. $208 million. Seventh biggest movie of 1978. The biggest non Bond sequel ever. Roger Ebert refused to review it.

[Chris Ryan]

Why?

[Bill Simmons]

Just didn't write a review. He was movie critic for the Chicago.

[Chris Ryan]

He was an up no review.

[Bill Simmons]

Did the TV show and he. They skipped over and he said it was pure trash.

[Sean Fennessey]

I was just gonna say. I think he used the word trash.

[Bill Simmons]

He said it was pure trash.

[Chris Ryan]

Interesting.

[Bill Simmons]

Not a fan.

[Chris Ryan]

It's quite a stand. I mean, it's not pure trash, but.

[Bill Simmons]

As we know, Raj is the sequel Police.

[Sean Fennessey]

Raj also doesn't like horror movies.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah, he's the Martin Brody of sequel.

[Sean Fennessey]

He thinks there's something degr rating about the 80s slasher. Yeah, he never supported them. And this is an 80s slasher.

[Bill Simmons]

He could have reviewed it. I mean it was. He should have reviewed all of the top.

[Chris Ryan]

I wonder if it was like 15 hornier. You know, if Eddie had sealed the deal. If Roger would have been like, I.

[Sean Fennessey]

If Jackie would have whipped him out. Yeah, then he would have. He would have been all about it. Well, we know, we know Raj, he loves the female form. I mean, he always writes up. He's always writing about breasts.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah, yeah. R rated version of this. Raj would be like, yeah, I'll review it.

[Sean Fennessey]

You make it seem like he had like complete veto power. Like he.

[Chris Ryan]

At the trip, he was just like, the fuck out. Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

Can you imagine him storming out of a screen? No review, you get nothing.

[Sean Fennessey]

It's like the soup Nazi.

[Chris Ryan]

You should try that for big pic. Just 45 minutes of silence after Jurassic World.

[Sean Fennessey]

We're seeing Jurassic World this week. We'll see if I want to do an episode about it.

[Bill Simmons]

Just 45 seconds of dead air. You're just like playing Brick Blast.

[Chris Ryan]

We'll be right back.

[Bill Simmons]

We're going to take a break and do the categories. This episode is brought to you by State Farm. Life is full of decisions, big and small. And sometimes you make one you can really stand behind. I did this a few times in my life, especially in the mid 2010s after I left Grantland and ESPN. And I was like, you know what? I still think there's an idea for a company that could really work. And then the ringer. And now we're 10 years later, we're still here. State Farm gets it. Making confident choices can make all the difference. That's why with the State Farm personal price plan, you can choose the right amount of coverage to help create an affordable price. Talk to a State Farm agent today to learn how you can choose to bundle and save with the personal price plan. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there. Prices are based on rating plans that vary by state. Coverage options are selected by the customer. Availability, amount of discounts, and savings and eligibility vary by state. Most rewatchable scene, all the kids getting together and getting ready to go sailing with the happy John Williams music. I think the title of that song is the kids are sailing, they're happy.

[Chris Ryan]

Cousin Jackie arrives.

[Bill Simmons]

The water skier gets eaten.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah, that's. That's where it really goes up.

[Bill Simmons]

When you see somebody water skiing and.

[Sean Fennessey]

You hear the not good. Not good. Really? So this was the first scene that Jenno Spark shot and he did it because they needed to rewrite the whole movie.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

And he was like, just give me five days to shoot a really cool scene and this works.

[Chris Ryan]

You can also see that that came through in the edit where you're like, man, this chick is Water skiing for a really long time.

[Sean Fennessey]

There's a lot of time spent. I. We do need to explore with you. The woman pouring gasoline all over herself before the sh. Before lighting a flare and exploding the entire. It's one of my favorite things.

[Chris Ryan]

That clip is just playing in Joe Dumars office.

[Bill Simmons]

What is that for? Anytime an NBA team up, she gets gasoline.

[Chris Ryan]

It's so hard to do, even with a shark attacking you. It's like, how did you do that?

[Sean Fennessey]

What's the math on that? Like, what was she going for?

[Bill Simmons]

Why does she have a giant thing of gasoline in her house?

[Sean Fennessey]

What are you trying to do, like, pour gasoline on the shark?

[Bill Simmons]

Matches? Throw the matches at him?

[Chris Ryan]

It's actually quick thinking. She's like, oh, what I'll do is just, like, douse this thing in gasoline and shoot a flare at it. It's just like, hey, leave it to the professionals. Water ski driver.

[Sean Fennessey]

There's, like, a great overhead shot of.

[Chris Ryan]

Her pouring, but for a second, I was kind of like, is she like, I'd rather immolate myself than get eaten by a shark.

[Bill Simmons]

Even the shark was like, what the are you doing? Finishing.

[Chris Ryan]

Just get this over with.

[Sean Fennessey]

It's like, my favorite thing in the movie. I love that so much.

[Bill Simmons]

We got to make that a gift. Two parts. We can get to 13, but. Oh, my God. Oh, man. All right, more rewatchable scenes. Brody in the shark tower freaking out and shooting at the bluefish.

[Sean Fennessey]

Also kind of do more zest.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah. There's a kid, like, kind of right there.

[Chris Ryan]

I mean, it's close.

[Bill Simmons]

He's pointing at the kid.

[Chris Ryan]

This is. This is the funny thing with, like, the town council meeting is the town council definitely has a point. Like, Brody seems insane. Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

Now that's. You lose your job with the shooting at the bluefish. I don't know if there's anything coming back from that. And you lose your job when you trade your unprotected 2026 page for dairy Queen.

[Sean Fennessey]

Do you think in that scene that Brody has PTSD from the original Jaws and that's what's driving?

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah, because he says, I won't go through that hell again. Like, you're gonna have to get somebody else to fight this shark tower.

[Bill Simmons]

Great shot, Gordo. Brody coming down the stairs.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah, that's a good one.

[Bill Simmons]

I like the shark tower in general. I was thinking about getting one from my backyard.

[Sean Fennessey]

Okay. That seems normal.

[Bill Simmons]

Cool. Just climb up there.

[Chris Ryan]

Where's dad?

[Sean Fennessey]

What about how angry the mayor is when he's up there? He's like, what's he doing up there? Relax, he's a cop. He's doing something.

[Bill Simmons]

Shark tower. It's his job. Brody showing them the shark picture. Yeah. This was Roy's Oscar clip. I think Ryan talked himself into the movie at that point. The check had cleared. He found out what points meant, and he was like, I know what a shark looks like because I've seen one up close. You better do something about this one, because I don't intend to go through that hell again. It's good.

[Chris Ryan]

And they're like, nah, it doesn't look.

[Bill Simmons]

Like a shark off Roy.

[Sean Fennessey]

They're really rude to him.

[Bill Simmons]

Looks like an eye. All right, this is when the movie takes off. The last 50 minutes. Eddie gets eaten. This is just a tremendous bitten burst.

[Chris Ryan]

Into the boat and then sucked down.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yes.

[Bill Simmons]

The whole. Eddie.

[Chris Ryan]

Swim, Eddie. Hurry.

[Sean Fennessey]

Faster.

[Bill Simmons]

Come on, swim.

[Sean Fennessey]

Hurry, hurry, Eddie.

[Bill Simmons]

But in Eddie and Eddie's like, the actor they hired. I had this in the research. Like, didn't know how to swim. They didn't realize it, so they had to, like, quickly teach him, like, how to swim. So you can kind of see it. He's. It's in the water.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah.

[Chris Ryan]

He looks really uncomfortable when he first.

[Bill Simmons]

Goes over because he can't swim.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

This is a.

[Bill Simmons]

Probably would have checked that on the Eddie character. Hey, any swimming in your history?

[Sean Fennessey]

This is. His name is Gary Dubin.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

This is an incredible. Imagine if you were just a man named Gary Dubin. And this is how your IMDb or your Wikipedia started. He was an American actor best known for his portrayal of Punky Lazar, a friend of Danny Partridge on the Partridge Family. He also voiced To Loo and the Aristocats in 1970 and played the part of ill fated teenager Eddie Marchand, who was eaten by the shark in Jaws, too.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

That's his legacy. That's his Legacy.

[Bill Simmons]

That's his IMDb.

[Sean Fennessey]

He was on Green Acres, land of the giants.

[Bill Simmons]

Eddie, it's tough.

[Sean Fennessey]

The scene. The moment when he gets up to the boat and puts his hand on. On the. On the boat and it pulled. The wood breaks and pulls away. Incredible stuff.

[Bill Simmons]

Really great. The first big sailboat attack where Mike almost dies. Yeah.

[Chris Ryan]

He gets knocked out.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

When he bangs his head.

[Bill Simmons]

Great. And the boat's split and it's just. I love all that. Helicopter guy dies. We talked about him.

[Sean Fennessey]

Awesome.

[Bill Simmons]

Sean almost gets eaten. Not you, Sean. Sean and the little boy Sean. And Marge dies.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah, Marge does die. It's tough.

[Bill Simmons]

Probably the most altruistic person in the movie. Yeah. Didn't see Anybody else jumping in for Sean?

[Sean Fennessey]

No. She's an idiot. What is she thinking? That's an insane.

[Chris Ryan]

You would watch Sean get eaten.

[Sean Fennessey]

I probably wouldn't jump in if I saw the shark coming. I think you would jump in.

[Chris Ryan]

I mean, I think if we're doing blame pie, you got to jump in. It's all Brody for being like, take Mike back to the hospital. But not Sean.

[Sean Fennessey]

No, it's Ellen Brody that morning Ellen. When Ellen Brody is like, where Shawn? He's probably out playing somewhere. I'm like, this is a 10 year old child.

[Chris Ryan]

We've got it.

[Bill Simmons]

No, this was the late 70s. My mom didn't know where I was first.

[Sean Fennessey]

You live in Jawstown. You don't live any. There's already been a shark sighting. Yeah, it's crazy.

[Bill Simmons]

Can't judge. So many kids got up. This is why it was the heyday for serial killers and terrible people. Kids would just be like, yeah, I'll be back in six hours.

[Sean Fennessey]

Guys, there's a shark sighting in Amity. Well, dad and Ellen Brody is like, no big deal.

[Bill Simmons]

Don't get away from.

[Chris Ryan]

His wife sneaks him out.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah, but she doesn't know where her child is.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah, yeah.

[Chris Ryan]

Like, it could be. He could be down like, you know, getting ice cream or something like that.

[Sean Fennessey]

Well, she's gonna have to explain to Marge's parents why she's fucking dead.

[Bill Simmons]

Blame pie that they leave today. I had this in nitpicks. They leave to take unconscious Mike Brody back to a hospital and nobody says, hey, if you're gonna go back 4 year olds, why don't you take the 8 year old kid? Terrified.

[Chris Ryan]

Sorry.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah. How old are you?

[Sean Fennessey]

Good. I think he's 10. But yeah, good note.

[Bill Simmons]

But maybe.

[Sean Fennessey]

I think that they explained that he's 10 in the movie. Do they not?

[Chris Ryan]

Oh, I thought you would be like. They explained that he has pituitary problems.

[Bill Simmons]

No, he was around my age when I saw the movie. Okay, so he's somewhere between 8 and 10. But anyway, they just left him behind.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

[Bill Simmons]

That was his brother. He had no other siblings in the water with him. Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

Poor Marge.

[Bill Simmons]

Very strange. Great kill all time scene. And then the electric cable ending.

[Chris Ryan]

Not sure about the science for that one.

[Bill Simmons]

Well, here's the thing.

[Chris Ryan]

I know we're questioning science. It's okay. I'm just saying.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah, we know it now because we know it's happening in the theater. Seeing this for the first time, it was an awesome idea. Up this cable comes up and he realizes what it is. And he starts hitting it and you're like, what the is he doing? Why is he doing? But you realize as the sharks come in. Oh, I see what he's going to try to do. Just a really inspired idea.

[Craig Horlbeck]

It's.

[Chris Ryan]

It's a culmination of the film or a climax of the movie that's lightly based on. Or it's based on two lightly made points. Earlier in the movie, Hendrick pulls up the power line. When they're dredging after the first Chekhov's power line. The shark expert is like. And they're also attracted by sonar. Like they are attracted to.

[Bill Simmons]

Yes.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah.

[Chris Ryan]

And. But if you're not paying attention hardcore to these random scenes, you're like, how the is this working? Like how is he banging on a wire and the shark is coming for it.

[Bill Simmons]

He's like, they're also attracted to hot girls. Most rewatchable. I think Eddie getting eaten is the best scene.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah. Can we just do the doomed sailing trip like them?

[Bill Simmons]

How about the last 50 minutes? That's the most rewatchable. But I would go, Eddie.

[Sean Fennessey]

The woman pouring gasoline on herself is the scene I will watch for the rest of my life.

[Chris Ryan]

I like the chopper. And within the doomed sailing trip. I think the chopper is so fucking cool.

[Bill Simmons]

What do you have for what's the most 1978 thing about this movie?

[Chris Ryan]

Letting kids hang out in a bar.

[Bill Simmons]

I had that as well. 18 year old smoking and drinking in a bar.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

I also have Len talking to Martin Brody about Martin Brody's wife where he's like, she's a hell of a man, sir.

[Chris Ryan]

We got to bring that back.

[Sean Fennessey]

Imagine Phoebe is a hell of a woman.

[Chris Ryan]

Chris Gary Simmons.

[Bill Simmons]

I'm gonna do that over July 4th weekend. I'm just gonna start complimenting my friends wives, see how it goes.

[Chris Ryan]

You want a mic?

[Bill Simmons]

A soda? I have a runner up. Donna Wilks, who we'll talk about later. Who's you might know for the people listening from this movie is the woman who's the kind of hot new girl in town but then just screams for the last 10 minutes of the movie. Yes. Incomplete peril. Her hair.

[Chris Ryan]

Yep.

[Bill Simmons]

Very late 70s specific. There was only a two year error where anybody had that haircut.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah. It's like bangs.

[Bill Simmons]

Almost like a bowl cut bangs. But and popped out on the side. Everybody had it. So it just makes me think of that.

[Sean Fennessey]

Hard to believe it didn't stick around what stage?

[Bill Simmons]

The best kids in the 70s hanging out with a guitar at the beach.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

This was your time Cr. This could have. This is when you would have thrived.

[Chris Ryan]

I would have been the bony bear of Amity people.

[Bill Simmons]

I need a pack of cigs and guitar.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

On a boat is something I now need to see.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah, I have. A lot of the teenage behavior has aged the best for me, including just being like, we've got beers stowed away in a garage. You know those beers have just been cooking all summer. Oh, yeah, they've got.

[Bill Simmons]

They've got to do.

[Chris Ryan]

How about having a code for get me out of this situation? When Brody's like, we got to look into that 908. And he's like, what's a 908? He's like, I just wanted you to get me out of there. Yeah. We gotta do more of that, right?

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

What should. It should be like a mid pod thing where like Bill's on a jag about some girl's haircut and I'm like, CR908. 908.

[Bill Simmons]

A 908 problem. The late 70s summer beach montage I had in the what stage? The best where they're. It's like a guy or little kid putting mustard on a hot dog and then somebody's flying a kite. And it was just like very 70s.

[Sean Fennessey]

Is that nostalgic in the lead up to the killer whale, the beached whale.

[Bill Simmons]

No, it's the lead up to when he goes. He's in the shark tower.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

They have this montage. Everyone's having fun at the beach. And then it finishes as Brody in the shark tower.

[Sean Fennessey]

Okay.

[Bill Simmons]

And it's made me nostalgic. Now you just see somebody with a fucking Covid mask on and two guys smoking pot.

[Chris Ryan]

What beach are you on?

[Bill Simmons]

I don't understand.

[Sean Fennessey]

Did something happen.

[Chris Ryan]

In your yard and you think beaches look like jokes?

[Sean Fennessey]

Okay.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

It's the second straight pod that Bill has brought up. People just smoking marijuana in public. He seems annoyed. Do you guys think.

[Chris Ryan]

Do you think cocaine came up after hours?

[Sean Fennessey]

Well, the floor is yours.

[Chris Ryan]

I've heard from some. Some concerned listeners who are like, not enough. Maybe, maybe. Maybe we needed a cocaine expert.

[Sean Fennessey]

On the interesting was one available expert for which part?

[Bill Simmons]

Just.

[Chris Ryan]

Just like what it feels like to be up all night on cocaine out in New York City. Not that the character is, but that Martin Scorsese certainly had been.

[Sean Fennessey]

I think it's a fair point, right?

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

Should we just retake the whole pod? Delete what we had?

[Chris Ryan]

No, I just. I just.

[Bill Simmons]

I've never done cocaine.

[Chris Ryan]

Pass along some feedback as you know.

[Bill Simmons]

Neither have I. Yeah, we'll we'll make up for it when Maril and I do Casablanca on Blow after doing a few lives.

[Chris Ryan]

Mirror in the middle.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

This is what it was like to own a bar in Morocco.

[Bill Simmons]

Cruising car culture. One of the screenwriters, Carl Gottlieb, said he got the idea because of this sailboat thing, because so many people would just drive around in cars, which we've seen in days and confused other movies.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

And he was like, well, let's do this with sailboats. Like, these kids, every day, they just go out in the water. Pretty good idea.

[Sean Fennessey]

It's very American Graffiti in general. The movie, I like it.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

I had.

[Bill Simmons]

Now they'd be playing Fortnite. Like, just be five kids in five different houses. Just like, dude, power me up. I'm losing my life.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

I feel like you've been radicalized by something.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah. I just like this era. I like when people hung out and did shit together.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah, that's true.

[Bill Simmons]

Let's bring it back.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah, let's bring it back.

[Chris Ryan]

My last what stage? The best is just Tina screaming. Sh.

[Bill Simmons]

I have a couple other ones. Lighthouses.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

Those have aged well.

[Bill Simmons]

It's like seeing them in movies.

[Sean Fennessey]

Okay.

[Chris Ryan]

They typically do age well, though.

[Bill Simmons]

They'll show it early. They'll be like, we got a lighthouse in this movie. And be like, okay, we're coming back. Yeah, sign me up. Maids that show up for a work already dressed like a maid.

[Chris Ryan]

Is it the maid or she the babysitter?

[Bill Simmons]

What is she?

[Chris Ryan]

I don't know. Why do they need one, too? They don't many parents.

[Bill Simmons]

This is like a big thing in TV shows in the 70s when they.

[Chris Ryan]

Have a small clapboard house.

[Sean Fennessey]

But I'm like, why does she have this job as a secretary? And then she's employing somebody to work in the house. Like, just quit your job and take care of your family, for Christ.

[Chris Ryan]

Do you think it's like a Keeping up with the Joneses kind of thing where, like, Len makes it seem like, oh, you don't have any help. Yeah, we got to do that to be successful.

[Sean Fennessey]

It's like, does it work for me? Terrible. Maybe it's a. Maybe it's a comment on capitalism.

[Chris Ryan]

Sure.

[Bill Simmons]

The last one I had was the idea of seeing the shark early enough and was smart. You got a zag from the last movie.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

You're not building up any. Any suspense. We know what the shark looks like.

[Sean Fennessey]

That was Jano's big theory.

[Bill Simmons]

Let's see the shark. Big kuna burger order. Best use of food and drink. The Punch.

[Sean Fennessey]

Not a ton. Yeah, but the punch sucked, right?

[Bill Simmons]

The punch being bad.

[Chris Ryan]

Mike is and his buddies are eating at the bar when they're like. And they say to the bartender this is the only place that the garbage man delivers. You know, I love a little.

[Sean Fennessey]

That looks like some rank bar pizza though. I know it looks gnarly.

[Chris Ryan]

I'm just saying it's the best use. I'm not saying I'd want to eat it.

[Bill Simmons]

Great shot. Go to award most cinematic shot. It's probably Eddie getting pulled down.

[Chris Ryan]

Oh, I like pulling the wood off. I like the par. The water skiing stuff. I like a lot of the like. Like wide shots of her going back and forth across the ocean.

[Bill Simmons]

Good wide shot of the. That scene when the. When he's picking up the poison bullets.

[Chris Ryan]

Oh yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

His son comes over and help. And they do a nice little wide shot with the water.

[Sean Fennessey]

Oh, you know what's a great one though is we didn't talk about the very beginning when they're at the gala event at the. And I don't even. What building is that that they're in.

[Chris Ryan]

It's the new develop. It's like the new conference center that.

[Sean Fennessey]

They'Ve built where the high school band is playing. There's like a long crane shot that goes all the way over the swimming pool and then down.

[Bill Simmons]

Classic Jeanneau.

[Chris Ryan]

I bet that was Hancock in his bag. And they were like this guy the fuck out of here.

[Sean Fennessey]

It feels like that. It does feel like that.

[Bill Simmons]

That kid Cudi. Pursuit of Happiness Aware Best needle drop. They don't throw a 70s song in this.

[Chris Ryan]

So I guess Happy Jaws music John.

[Bill Simmons]

Williams Happy JDub's just killing it.

[Chris Ryan]

There's stuff on the radio but I couldn't even determine.

[Sean Fennessey]

They don't sing anything like would have.

[Chris Ryan]

Killed the two Falm.

[Bill Simmons]

The big two.

[Chris Ryan]

Been like I'm. I've been working on this riff.

[Bill Simmons]

The Sean fantasy word for stealth homage that gives every movie nerd a criteria orgasm.

[Sean Fennessey]

I mean the muni on the bounty speech that Douglas gives. You know he gives the Captain Bly. You know that's a great moment. It Douglas with a dork.

[Bill Simmons]

I don't have a best character name. There's no chess Rockwell Brocklanders award this episode. I was just thinking I even looked through the IMDb to make sure Len.

[Chris Ryan]

Peterson is a really good real estate developer name.

[Sean Fennessey]

I like Dr. Elkins. I think it's pretty good. Also think just a gal named Marge when who's the last Marge that was under the age of 80 that you've seen that's true.

[Bill Simmons]

That's why she died. CR Flex category.

[Chris Ryan]

I gotta do Sean Penn. Brought my own pack. We do this for all the Shiders but three cigarettes with coffee before breakfast is. Is really elite. Elite shit.

[Bill Simmons]

I read his Wikipedia and I was just waiting for the COPD paragraph. I'm not sure it's in there but he. He definitely died a little early.

[Chris Ryan]

And then I also just for. For fun I did Den of Thieves Benihana award for the Hog's Breath Saloon. Which is a real Florida place. It was on an island but they moved it to Destiny.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah, it looks like it actually reminded me of the the Squire in Chatham. But it definitely looks like the Perfect Storm Bar. Yeah, good job at that. The Butch's Girlfriend Award. Wink link in the film is the first hour. It's just slow.

[Chris Ryan]

I. Mine was.

[Bill Simmons]

Could be tighter.

[Chris Ryan]

The incredulity of the town council. I think. I think we. We have enough evidence to suggest that A this guy knows what he's talking about and B this can happen here. So for as freaked out as you might be about your new hotel like you should maybe give him some.

[Bill Simmons]

I had that. In what stage?

[Chris Ryan]

The worst.

[Bill Simmons]

But that's a good call. But we talked about it. Also doesn't really matter when the people the heroes of the previous movie who have no credibility with anybody. Nobody's like maybe we should listen to him. He did. He was right the last.

[Chris Ryan]

He did find the Ark of the Covenant. You know.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah, maybe. Maybe he's honest. No, they don't do it.

[Chris Ryan]

Do you have a butcher's girlfriend?

[Sean Fennessey]

It's kind of tied up in. In what? In my flex.

[Bill Simmons]

All right.

[Chris Ryan]

Right.

[Bill Simmons]

Wait, what's age the worst other than Lorraine Gary being married to the head of Universal and somehow getting cast in all these movies. How did they decide to make this movie and have multiple kids in the group get killed but none of them were Larry Vaughn Jr. Wouldn't that have.

[Chris Ryan]

Been the natural revenge early in the movie?

[Bill Simmons]

And that's what happens and like like did we need Larry von Junior in the last 20 minutes? Well he absolutely should have died.

[Sean Fennessey]

I think that he's not killed because then they don't have to show the mayor cope with that in any way because we know the mayor was not available for the end of this movie.

[Bill Simmons]

Oh, because he left the shoot.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yes, that's because his. Well this is. This is relate. His wife was. Had to get a biopsy cancer. Murray Hamilton's real life wife. And so he did like you know all of his Days. In five days.

[Chris Ryan]

Okay.

[Sean Fennessey]

And then they got him off the set. Which is one of the reasons why the movie kind of ends the way that it does. It doesn't. There's no conclusion.

[Chris Ryan]

And he is actually too, you know, in terms of his performance. He. He's like. I'm only like a figurehead. Like the Len guy is obviously running the town and he's just like kind of shuffling along counter.

[Bill Simmons]

The movie ends after Roy Shatter electrocutes the shark. And we didn't need to see Maravon anyway, so I think Larry should have been shoots at smithereens.

[Sean Fennessey]

Okay.

[Chris Ryan]

Okay.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah. That guy. That family.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah. Mars had to die and he gets to.

[Chris Ryan]

Can I throw in an additional Larry Vaughn? What's age? The worst.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah.

[Chris Ryan]

When Larry goes up to Michael and he's like, dad's got you working. Huh? And it's just like, hey, fuck you, man. Remember when you sent my dad out there to get eaten? Like working. I'm not working. Mind your own business.

[Bill Simmons]

The Brody should have hated Marvin.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah, classic politician son. Not a nice guy.

[Bill Simmons]

What else you have for what's edge worth anything?

[Sean Fennessey]

No, I don't.

[Bill Simmons]

We'll have a couple. Mike Brody, terrible actor.

[Chris Ryan]

Tough.

[Bill Simmons]

So bad that he gets knocked unconscious and he's giving the same performance unconscious as he was during the first hour of the movie. Yeah, also terrible. Big brother. Don't bring your little 8 year old out for your big. Let's all get drunk and. And sailboats and like, maybe not the best place for your old brother.

[Sean Fennessey]

I do believe this was Mark Gruner's final credit as an actor.

[Chris Ryan]

That he is a really a former American actor.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yes.

[Chris Ryan]

I wonder what he does have.

[Bill Simmons]

Listen, sometimes things aren't your calling and you realize it and you move on to the next thing.

[Chris Ryan]

Is he the kid from the first Jaws? Is it like the same. It's not Michael from the first Jaw.

[Sean Fennessey]

Okay?

[Bill Simmons]

Like Donna Wilkes is. She's. She's like, are you gonna be there tomorrow? And he's like, I don't know, maybe.

[Chris Ryan]

Well, he's playing hard to get their date.

[Bill Simmons]

Or is he's half dead.

[Sean Fennessey]

It's not a very good actor. I agree with that.

[Bill Simmons]

There's no black people in this movie. But there was no Black people in Jaws 1 either. But maybe this is Amity where they just. It's just all white people.

[Sean Fennessey]

You're saying Jim Crow still exists in them?

[Bill Simmons]

I don't understand why there aren't any black people in this movie.

[Chris Ryan]

Maybe we could do Sinners a sequel that connects Jaws world Well, really good.

[Bill Simmons]

I have the Van Nathan Award. Did this movie need more black people? I would go a step further. One black, one anybody who's not a white person. What's going on?

[Chris Ryan]

Why do we have a new deputy who's black?

[Bill Simmons]

Are there no minorities in Amity at all?

[Sean Fennessey]

Maybe this is a parable about punishing the white oppressor by having them killed by sharks in this community.

[Chris Ryan]

But then they. They put. Put Lou Gossett Jr through hell next film.

[Sean Fennessey]

That's true. But then Mario Van Peoples gets his revenge.

[Chris Ryan]

That's true.

[Bill Simmons]

In the climax, Bob rescues Lucy from the shark, but then gets bitten in half.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

And it's so gruesome, they decided, this will get us an R. We can't have this in the theater. So Bob survives, but I'm not sure you can see Bob.

[Chris Ryan]

I would say one of the things that's aged the worst is while realistic, that that size of a group might be hanging out during the summer. It's not good for film when you're like, there's, like, 22 kids here, and it's hard to keep. And I feel like six of them are named Eddie.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah.

[Chris Ryan]

And it's kind of hard to keep it straight. Like, who's fucking who? Who's hanging out?

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

To me, it's always the guy.

[Bill Simmons]

Bob. I don't know who Bob is.

[Sean Fennessey]

To me. To me, it's the guy who's always. Not Keith Gordon. Because Keith Gordon.

[Chris Ryan]

Well, there's Napoleon Dynamite guy next to Keith Gordon. That's. Yeah, that.

[Sean Fennessey]

Isn't that Bob?

[Chris Ryan]

No, that's not Bob. He's the one who gets. Because the Napoleon Dynamite gets Brooke. He's been pining after Brooke.

[Sean Fennessey]

Right, Right.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah. Who's the guy with the curly hair who's like, hey, Mike, going out today?

[Sean Fennessey]

That's. That's Andy.

[Bill Simmons]

It's just Mike, Bob, Eddie, Andy. It's all four.

[Chris Ryan]

If we could just get a little bit of roster shrinkage, I think that would be great.

[Sean Fennessey]

I see. You want. You want to use the stretch provision on Andy.

[Chris Ryan]

Well, just like, seven kids. I think I could keep that straight. There's like 14 of them.

[Bill Simmons]

The Ruffalo handed ribbon at Partridge, overacting words goes to Donna Wilkes, who screams like an absolute maniac for the last 10 minutes of this movie.

[Chris Ryan]

It's interesting.

[Bill Simmons]

So compelling as a screamer. It's both realistic, but also pretty annoying. And at one point, we have the classic 70s move that would never Happen now, where the guy is telling her to calm down and does the airplane shake like in the movie Airplane, he looks like borderline domestic violence.

[Sean Fennessey]

Larry looks like he's really slapper across the face.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah. That's another reason why he had to be.

[Chris Ryan]

That's true.

[Bill Simmons]

But she becomes the future star. I sent this to you guys. Six years later, makes a movie called Angel. Are you.

[Chris Ryan]

Are you announcing that for next week's rewatch?

[Bill Simmons]

To be classic.

[Sean Fennessey]

It's a wonderful.

[Bill Simmons]

I haven't seen it a long time, but she's a high school student in Hollywood by day and a hooker on Hollywood Boulevard at night. And then a serial killer tries to kill her, and she becomes involved in some sort of serial killer thing. And it made $17 million and was a surprise hit.

[Chris Ryan]

Is that a big.

[Bill Simmons]

And they made like, like Ty. They made like five of them.

[Sean Fennessey]

It's one of the key inspirations for the Maxine, the movie that came out a couple years ago. The horror movie that. The final movie in the Ti west trilogy.

[Chris Ryan]

My overacting goes to. And Dusenberry as Tina Wilcox. I feel like she really. She chews the scenery. Every time she gets it. She, like, runs up to the camera. She's like. Like every time she's Miss Amity.

[Sean Fennessey]

What was her title?

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah, she was Miss Amity.

[Sean Fennessey]

Miss Amity.

[Chris Ryan]

All the guys want to get on Tina. It's a lot. A lot of competition.

[Bill Simmons]

Okay, Sean, you have a flex category.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah. So the greatest acting I've ever seen in my life award goes to Murray Hamilton, who's literally doing a terrible performance. And the best performance I've ever seen where you can watch him as the mayor of a town that has already endured a shark attack that becomes national news. He has presumably been reelected mayor.

[Chris Ryan]

It's been four years.

[Sean Fennessey]

Another shark has arrived, arrives in his town, and he is compartmentalizing and just shutting it down like nothing is happening. And the reason the performance works is because he's gotten terrible news in his real life about his wife, who he believes may have cancer. And so he is just dead eyed. He can barely even talk. In this movie, Murray Hamilton is barely giving a performance.

[Chris Ryan]

He has to, like, pass the baton to Len in the town council meeting.

[Sean Fennessey]

Exactly. But, you know, we. Knowing what we know about the backstory, it weirdly works for the character as, like, this politician has sold his soul. But in fact, it was just a man who could barely finish the day as an actor. And that, to me, is cinema.

[Bill Simmons]

And Scheider was like, I thought I was going to be the only one mailing it in this very dead eye.

[Sean Fennessey]

He can barely even see It's a.

[Bill Simmons]

Good one I had. This brings us to the CR things. Luke Wilson could have been Harrison Ford. Hottest takeaway. I'm glad you brought up Mare Vaughn. I think Marvon keeping his job after Jaws won is the biggest reach in movie sequel history.

[Chris Ryan]

You might be right.

[Bill Simmons]

So it's in the finals for me with after Halloween 2, when Michael Myers gets shot in both eyeballs. And shot. I think he's been shot like a total of 13 times at that point. And stabbed in the neck and blows up in the fire and burns to death when he then comes back two movies later. That would be my other choice. But Marvon, like, I just don't think he's getting reelected. I actually don't think he should be allowed to live in Amity.

[Chris Ryan]

I don't even know if he should be a free man.

[Bill Simmons]

The Kintner family is suing the town of Amity for seven years. And it's going to be like the Gawker Hulk Hogan settlement. It's going to be. They're going to get like $115 million.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

Out of this.

[Chris Ryan]

It's going to be renamed Kinderville.

[Bill Simmons]

And he's going to jail. That's how. It's not even. Forget that getting reelected. He's going to prison for what he did to the.

[Chris Ryan]

And if we're just whiteboarding here, how cool would Jaws to be? And this not to be touching type movie. If Brody, big fucking hero of Jaws 1 Mayor, rides the wave to mayor.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah.

[Chris Ryan]

And now finds himself in Larry's position. Yeah. Where he's like, fuck. I mean, there's a lot of responsibility that comes with this job, a lot of financial pressure. That may be a shark, it may not be. And then he's the one resisting. We get a new Brody coming in.

[Sean Fennessey]

I'm zagging. I'm going the other way. In fact, in America, we love our dirty politicians and we love for them to be revived in the national consciousness. And we are living through a moment.

[Bill Simmons]

I don't even think he was revived. I think they got that one wrong.

[Sean Fennessey]

He hit a rough patch and he bounced back.

[Chris Ryan]

Also, you never know with those island communities because it's so full of summer people who probably aren't voting in local elections. So if the locals are like this one, this guy, he looks out for our best financial interest, maybe they reelect him.

[Bill Simmons]

What are your thoughts, Craig?

[Craig Horlbeck]

Well, I feel like him falling into the same trap again. He gets reelected, and then once again, Brody's like, hey, I think there's a.

[Chris Ryan]

Shark in the Water.

[Craig Horlbeck]

And he's like, nah, lightning can't strike twice.

[Sean Fennessey]

A little dubious. The truth is actually that there are two sharks in Jaws. There's the shark that they catch at the beginning and then another. So we know that this is shark waters.

[Craig Horlbeck]

The two dive drivers went missing. A charred body washed up on shore. And he is still like, we don't know.

[Sean Fennessey]

In fairness, the charred body washing on shore is one of the craziest things that's ever happened in the history of movies. I can see him being a little bit confused by that one.

[Bill Simmons]

What's your hottest take?

[Chris Ryan]

I think if cousin Jackie never shows up in Amity, we have a much lower body count because all those guys are so trim struck by her.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah.

[Chris Ryan]

That they are like, trim struck.

[Bill Simmons]

Posh enough.

[Craig Horlbeck]

Is that a phrase?

[Bill Simmons]

Shrimp struck?

[Chris Ryan]

There's a less polite way of saying it.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah. It's different for.

[Chris Ryan]

But lots of guys are like, we gotta take Jackie sailing. You know, like, it's like she's. She's driving all of this. And I feel like she has some capability in this and honestly find her. Her freaking out and her trauma to be a little, you know, unearned.

[Bill Simmons]

I also think Tina there has. I think it's a much more interesting if we're just with the kids the whole time.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

I think Tina immediately hates the new girl, Jackie. Yeah, that's their feuding.

[Chris Ryan]

Tina and Jackie hate each other. Brooke, like, you know, there's like a whole summer I turned pretty thing going on with Brooke. You know, there's just a lot going on.

[Bill Simmons]

Good. Could have been a good season. One of a terrible Amazon.

[Craig Horlbeck]

People used to have sex on sailboats. That just. That didn't make sense to me because if it doesn't go well, then I've never done it. Stuck at sea.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

Not a big sailboat guy myself.

[Bill Simmons]

So I can't say it seems a little risky with the water and the way things kind of move up and down, down.

[Craig Horlbeck]

And again, if she turns you down, then you're just a thousand feet deep into the ocean.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah. You get into the true.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah. That's not ideal. How's. How's the first season of trim struck going for you?

[Chris Ryan]

There is like a very funny. It's always funny about like out on the water for implicate the implication.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah. It's a shudder original. Did you have a hottest take?

[Sean Fennessey]

I do. We've been talking a lot about 1977 and what a critical year that was. And we've already done an episode on Jaws and on the Jaws episode On the Star wars episode, we said that those were the movies that kind of killed the new Hollywood, but this is actually the movie that killed the new Hollywood. Yeah, this is the one that this movie being.

[Chris Ryan]

These movies don't even have to be.

[Sean Fennessey]

K. And making $78 million in 1978 is when it's over. That's because Jaws and Star wars are special. This movie is fun, but it's not special. And that is why we are where we are.

[Bill Simmons]

That's how we got to 1983 with Superman 3 and all those other ones.

[Craig Horlbeck]

But did the people in 1978 feel that way? Because when Empire came out, they were probably excited. When Jaws 2 came out, was everybody pissed?

[Bill Simmons]

No, I'll tell you firsthand, wanted to go first day was more excited for Rocky 2, they could have kept serving him out.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yep.

[Craig Horlbeck]

But after the movie came out and the reviews were middling, was everybody like, this was a mistake, we need to stop.

[Bill Simmons]

Or was it like, ah, no, America wanted it. The other thing is, you didn't really get to see these movies after they were in the movie theater unless they were on, like, abc.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah, well, there was still something relatively novel about a sequel. I mean, were criticized for being unoriginal, but there were not a thousand of them like there are now. Like, Chris is asking about Chris.

[Chris Ryan]

Spielberg is a good example of what how it changes is like. He's like, I think that making sequels is like for carnies.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah. And then he's the Lost World and.

[Chris Ryan]

Then he makes four sequels.

[Bill Simmons]

You know, you can't overstate how little we had going on in the late 70s. Like when baseball went on strike. It was one of the worst things that ever happened to me in 1981. It was just like, oh my God. It was like this black fucking hole. Like there's nothing, there's. There's nothing could compare to that.

[Sean Fennessey]

Do you want to pour gasoline on yourself when that happens?

[Bill Simmons]

Let's. We'll take a break and do casting.

[Chris Ryan]

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[Bill Simmons]

All right, so there's a great casting. What if.

[Chris Ryan]

This is movie one of my favorite casting what ifs of all time.

[Sean Fennessey]

What is it? I don't know.

[Bill Simmons]

Rice Scheider. It's gonna do Deer Hunter.

[Sean Fennessey]

Oh, yes. Okay. A reverse casting.

[Chris Ryan]

What if this universe. A fishburn for me, though.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah. Can't agree on the. On the money for Deer Hunter.

[Chris Ryan]

He had creative problems with Chimito, too.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah. And somehow he's out and ends up. The Universal is like, well, you gotta do a movie with us. You're doing Jaws, too. And he wasn't gonna be in Jaws 2.

[Sean Fennessey]

But what part is he in Deer.

[Bill Simmons]

Hunter, he was gonna be De Niro.

[Sean Fennessey]

That's insane.

[Chris Ryan]

He was gonna be Michael.

[Sean Fennessey]

That would not have worked. Well, I'm very happy we got what we got.

[Bill Simmons]

I'm happy we ended up with one of the best actors of all time.

[Sean Fennessey]

But in that part, it's just. I don't know. That doesn't feel like a Scheider part to me. It's kind of similar to Sorcerer, you know, the great casting what if of Sorcerer is he wanted McQueen and he went with Scheider, and I think it's better that he went with Scheider. Even though we've been cool with McQueen, deer hunter with Scheider.

[Bill Simmons]

I think he's too old to be the Deer Hunter.

[Chris Ryan]

I probably agree with you. But there is.

[Bill Simmons]

I think he would have been good, though.

[Chris Ryan]

There's something about his career where he is, like, such a great second guy in a lot of movies. And then even in Jaws, like, arguably is second to the show.

[Bill Simmons]

Because in Deer Hunter, you're playing. You're basically playing off a bunch of these great actors.

[Sean Fennessey]

But, you know, I mean, you're going opposite Walken in Walken's greatest performance. That's tough. I mean, the fact that De Niro has holds the weight against Walken is a big part of why I feel.

[Chris Ryan]

Like Scheider goes toe to toe with Hoffman and Olivier and Marathon Man. Like in Hackman, I mean, he's not like, he's not Hackman, but he's.

[Bill Simmons]

We're going to do Deer Hunter live. It's going to be a live show.

[Sean Fennessey]

Live. Russian roulette.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah, I played Russian roulette in front of 1270 people at the will show.

[Sean Fennessey]

Bernthal. Yeah, yeah.

[Chris Ryan]

John Bernthal and I do Russian Relief together. Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

Live in Danang.

[Bill Simmons]

The crowd's like, what's this Deer Hunter movie they're doing? Is it a comedy? Anyway, Shatter Agreed, got 500k, got points, was miserable most of the time, and it worked out great for him. And then he had all that jazz the next year. And then his career went like that.

[Chris Ryan]

There's a bit about how he was so dedicated to the idea of getting out of this movie that he faked a nervous breakdown and trashed, like, the Beverly Wilshire or something like that. He, like, trashed his room to give it evidence of his mental state. And they were like, you're doing. You're Martin Brody.

[Bill Simmons]

There were some John D. Hancock hires that they got rid of once they changed direct. Ricky Schroeder was supposed to be Sean Brody. And then he got bounced for the other Sean Brody. Brody. And then Dreyfus. They asked him, tried to get him, and he said he wouldn't return unless he got to Mrs. Brody finally in the movie. And they said, you can't do that.

[Sean Fennessey]

That didn't happen.

[Chris Ryan]

That's happening in Trimstruck, though.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

Well, for the people listening for. We did the Jaws research in the book. Dreyfus's character has an affair with Mrs. Brody, remember?

[Sean Fennessey]

Right, I forgot about that.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

They decided not to put that in the movie. Probably a good idea.

[Sean Fennessey]

So Dreyfus instead made the Big Fix, a film no one's ever seen.

[Bill Simmons]

Dreyfus made some mistakes because he turned down all that.

[Chris Ryan]

Did you not know about the Big Fix?

[Bill Simmons]

We did this when we did the Dick Dreyfus. Whatever we did.

[Chris Ryan]

We did Close Encounters.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah. We did all the things that he didn't do. And there was a few of them. Best that Guy Award. Keith Gordon, not eligible. And Donna Wilkes is not eligible.

[Chris Ryan]

I got Joe Mascolo as Len Peterson. He was on Days of our lives for 34 years.

[Sean Fennessey]

I can't argue with that.

[Bill Simmons]

34 years. So I. Mine was Jeffrey Kramer, who then parlayed. He was the sidekick of Chief Brody and went on to do Halloween, too, ironically.

[Sean Fennessey]

Graduate of Ithaca College, which is where I went to school.

[Bill Simmons]

Jeffrey Kramer. Yeah, yeah. He's one of the police people in Halloween, too. Very upset about that. They can't catch Myers. Deanne Waiters Award.

[Chris Ryan]

Keith Gordon is Doug Fetterman, or perhaps a first in the history of Dion Waiters. The unseen character Grace Kinney, the one who's teasing the old guy's oldest teenage boy through the window. And they're having, like, the meeting at the beginning of. All the people are coming to the police station, are like, hey, Brody. Brody. And he's just like, she. He's teasing. She's Teasing my son.

[Bill Simmons]

It's probably Keith Gordon.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

Does he dial it up?

[Bill Simmons]

No, but I'm just. He's the only kid that stands out.

[Chris Ryan]

He gets like that. He gets your Captain Blythe moment.

[Sean Fennessey]

He does. Yeah, I guess it is Keith Gordon.

[Bill Simmons]

Craig, you have a flex category.

[Craig Horlbeck]

I'm gonna go with the I used to guys like you in prison award for the craziest quote. This movie's pretty. Pretty pg.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah.

[Craig Horlbeck]

And then there's that one scene when Jackie shows up on the dock and Larry Von junior Looks at her and he's like that. Tits like a sparrow.

[Bill Simmons]

That was crazy.

[Sean Fennessey]

It is really mean.

[Chris Ryan]

That was the Hancock cut. Yeah, that was. That was weird, dude.

[Bill Simmons]

Spare. Do Sparrows have Tits?

[Craig Horlbeck]

Never heard.

[Sean Fennessey]

I think it's meant.

[Chris Ryan]

I think it's supposed to just be.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah.

[Craig Horlbeck]

Never heard that phrase. Gonna holster it.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah. And Jackie was like, one day I'll be angel and I'll be on the streets of Los Angeles.

[Chris Ryan]

When you say you're gonna break it out on Ringer Fantasy now. Jalen Ramsey. It's like a pharaoh.

[Bill Simmons]

Half asset research. We covered a lot of this stuff. They filmed the. The Hogs Breast Saloon. Cr mentioned it's on Oskaloosa Island. They filmed a lot in Navarre Beach. I don't even know where that is.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

So, like, in the Keys.

[Chris Ryan]

It's in Florida. It's. I think it's. I think it's on the Gulf side. I don't know. I'm. But it's in Florida somewhere.

[Bill Simmons]

The kid who played Sean said they were filming scenes in those with all the kind of wrecked things. And an actual hammerhead started circling them at one point. And they were all scared. Sheesh. And then in the birdie's front porch, they had a flower planner painted bright yellow. And it was one of the barrels from the first Jaws. They just kind of snuck that in.

[Chris Ryan]

That's so cool, because when he comes home after getting fired, he stares at the barrel. And I was like, what's up with that?

[Bill Simmons]

Then they had that cable junction where the end of the movie is. It was a set they built. And at some point something got fucked up and it just started floating away and they almost lost it.

[Sean Fennessey]

I read that it's really. It was really slippery. And they kept floating away.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah, because the rocks are fiberglass.

[Bill Simmons]

And then. I mean, the movies that came out after Jaws one. Orca, Piranha Tentacles, Killer Fish, Barracuda Tena, Killer Shark, blood Beach Piranha 2. The Last Shark up from the Depths. Humanities from the Deep the island of the Fishman and Devil Fish are all movies that came out. Blood Evil fish, Blood Beach. They just went for it. And then there's some Jaws too. Like there's a tops trading card set.

[Chris Ryan]

Is there?

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah. Jaws too.

[Sean Fennessey]

That going like let's do an unboxing video right now.

[Bill Simmons]

I don't think it's. We probably. That would be fun. Actually be great. You get those boxes for like 20 bucks.

[Sean Fennessey]

What's in who? Like is it just like Jaws? Like who's on the cards?

[Bill Simmons]

It would be. They, they would have like the scenes from the movie. Like Eddie's in danger.

[Chris Ryan]

It's Cousin Jackie.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

Ellen Brody, your fave.

[Bill Simmons]

And then they were going to use the sharks from the original film but they had rusted and rotted away in Universal Studios. They had to make sure.

[Chris Ryan]

It's weird that it took four years and they had like. Basically they made no technological like advances in shark technology and fake shark.

[Bill Simmons]

It is a better shark.

[Sean Fennessey]

Burned shark.

[Chris Ryan]

But it sounds like it was a good idea as much. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

Apex Mountain Shatter now sequels. No. Lorraine Gary sounds like Jaws for.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah. That's her centerpiece. That's her. That's her. Her highlight.

[Bill Simmons]

Donna Williams, definitely Angel.

[Chris Ryan]

Definitely.

[Bill Simmons]

High school student by day, hooker by.

[Chris Ryan]

Night, serial killer victim by.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

Where would you say the word hooker sits in your all time word rankings? Top 20, top 50.

[Bill Simmons]

It's like those old. Those old ABC promos. Somebody's killing hookers.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

And Dan Tann has got to find out who. Coming up tonight on Vegas after your local news. To catch a killer, you've got to become a killer. Tonight on Charlie's Angels, you're doing Ernie Anderson's dad.

[Sean Fennessey]

That's what he would do.

[Bill Simmons]

Apex Mountain. Every kid except Keith Gordon probably is their Apex Mountain being in this movie. I'm guessing water skiing murders. I'm gonna say yes. I'm gonna make the case for water skiing. Seeing because this is right here on Fonzie. Jumping the shark on Happy Days. This is like Apex water skincare culture.

[Chris Ryan]

No, because of my movie or because you just don't want. You don't.

[Bill Simmons]

Because I wear contacts. It sounds miserable.

[Chris Ryan]

Okay.

[Sean Fennessey]

Have you done it?

[Chris Ryan]

No.

[Sean Fennessey]

Have you ever done it? Nude.

[Bill Simmons]

Sharks? No. Murray Hamilton. Definitely not. Terrible making of documentaries about a movie.

[Chris Ryan]

Fun. It's a good one.

[Sean Fennessey]

I enjoyed this one.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

It's one of the worst making. Why is it 40 minutes?

[Sean Fennessey]

I'll watch.

[Bill Simmons]

This is Jaws 2.

[Sean Fennessey]

I'll watch every one of these forever.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

Two.

[Sean Fennessey]

Two old ass producers just like have you ever did.

[Chris Ryan]

You ever see The Marathon Man 1 that we were talking about where it's just Robert Evans direct to camera, standing with his. His foot up on a chair?

[Sean Fennessey]

I love it.

[Chris Ryan]

I love.

[Sean Fennessey]

It's like 30 years from now, Olivier dictating to someone what a genius you were in every decision you made at the ringer. Like, that's what everybody wants.

[Chris Ryan]

A Grantland oral history. Do it. But straight to camera.

[Sean Fennessey]

Just you.

[Bill Simmons]

The p. The. One of the producers. It's. It's just so funny. They ask him about John D. Hancocker. He's trying to explain why he left, and he's like, did a great job. It just wasn't. Yeah, really. And he, like, clearly just shanked the guy and fired him.

[Craig Horlbeck]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

He torpedoed his whole career.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah. He's like. Wasn't anything John was doing. Yeah, it wasn't. I thought it was really terrible. Horrible. Oh, this will be good. We didn't get to do this for Jaws 1 Cruiser. Hanks.

[Chris Ryan]

I got this young cruise. Is Michael.

[Bill Simmons]

Like, losing it?

[Chris Ryan]

Cruz taps. Losing it. Cruz kind of looks like him, too.

[Sean Fennessey]

I do believe that's accurate.

[Chris Ryan]

All right.

[Craig Horlbeck]

But I thought this category is about the star.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah, it's gotta. You gotta.

[Chris Ryan]

It's.

[Craig Horlbeck]

Who's Scheider?

[Chris Ryan]

No. Right? Is it?

[Bill Simmons]

Yes.

[Craig Horlbeck]

Who's the. Who's the main character?

[Bill Simmons]

I mean, you did an end around.

[Sean Fennessey]

I would say Hanks is Brody, but Cruz is any other character except for the mayor, including Len.

[Bill Simmons]

Can we talk this out?

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

Hanks would be the typical Chief Brody. I think I would rather see Cruz's Chief Brody, especially, like, him and Shark Boy. We'd get drunk.

[Chris Ryan]

Cruz, too.

[Bill Simmons]

He would. We'd get drunk.

[Sean Fennessey]

Cruz, what does Brody say when he's trying to draw Jaws in. In to the electric cable? What's his like, final. Where he's like, come on, you son of a. Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

I forget what his one is.

[Chris Ryan]

Smile, you said.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah, but it's a ver. It's a variation on Bite down, you little.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah. Cruz hitting with the paddle, hitting the electric.

[Chris Ryan]

We would get one really good cruise running on the beach shot. You know, like, maybe you had to get from the. The shark tower to, like, you know.

[Bill Simmons]

I think this is the answer. I think It's Hanks for Jaws 1 1. I think Jaws, too, needs Cruz. I think we need the unintentional comedy. I think there's an extra scene where he's, like, playing billiards and just, like, wiping the floor with his deputy.

[Sean Fennessey]

Cruz legendarily bad at playing drunk, though. And that's kind of a feature of.

[Bill Simmons]

But that would make Joshua more fun. Yeah, it's like, oh, Chief Brody's up.

[Chris Ryan]

He comes and he's like, the mayor is galactically stupid.

[Bill Simmons]

Scorsese or Spielberg. Obviously Spielberg. What role would Philip Seymour Hoffman have played?

[Sean Fennessey]

I like.

[Chris Ryan]

I mean young Philip Seymour Hoffman could have been a teen, but so I.

[Bill Simmons]

Had as one of the kids like the son of a woman era of Philip Seymour Hoffman. Deputy Hendrix maybe like doing like his all hanged on came Polly.

[Sean Fennessey]

Kind of crazy.

[Bill Simmons]

As Freddy.

[Chris Ryan]

There's some peeping going on in this movie for sure.

[Bill Simmons]

Picking it. I know we talked about the water scheme boat blowing up and how ridiculous that whole thing was, but I just want to say again again how ridiculous that whole thing was.

[Chris Ryan]

And we feel like we should go. We should do like a separate. Like let's break down this scene a little bit. Y and it's really only like 30 seconds of her after the par. The skier has gotten killed where she's just like, God. All right, well, option A is I could dive out and just run for swim for it. The shore is there. Option B is I could just stay put and hope the shark goes away. Or seeking. I could cover myself in gasoline and then it opens up a bunch of different things you could do. You know, maybe he doesn't like gasoline.

[Bill Simmons]

Is it the move to just be still in the bed?

[Sean Fennessey]

Well, the character does it later in the movie. You know, that's how Tina survives.

[Bill Simmons]

The move is definitely not to pour gasoline on herself.

[Sean Fennessey]

It's one of the best things I've.

[Bill Simmons]

Ever seen in a movie.

[Chris Ryan]

Not the flare gun. It's like the only flammable thing.

[Bill Simmons]

No, it's honestly like what would happen in a Naked Gun hot shot version of this movie would be what that scene.

[Chris Ryan]

It's also great how the old woman's like, ah, I got to call the cops.

[Sean Fennessey]

It's a great explosion too. The boat explosion.

[Chris Ryan]

Oh, they used to really blow up back then.

[Bill Simmons]

I only have one other pick. And it. So they finally save Sean. Then not when Marge dies like before. And the. The friend, like Mike's friend friend. He's like, we got you, buddy. And he keeps kissing him on the cheek. And it's just weird because they're not related.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah, it's like, what are you doing?

[Sean Fennessey]

Andy is a little familiar with Sean.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

What was that?

[Chris Ryan]

Hey, Andy, how's the peeping?

[Sean Fennessey]

It's a little creepy.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

If somebody kissed my son at that 8 year old son.

[Sean Fennessey]

Don't you kiss my son on the.

[Bill Simmons]

Cheek like that over and over again.

[Chris Ryan]

I'd be like, dude, full Sean Penn. Mister, is that my son in your arms?

[Bill Simmons]

What? Any more picket or.

[Chris Ryan]

No, we covered a lot of. A lot of them.

[Bill Simmons]

Sequel, prequel, prestige tv, all black caster, untouchable. I mean, obviously prequel is the answer. I think we all would have wanted to us.

[Chris Ryan]

I think I would actually throw a new category of anthology.

[Sean Fennessey]

I always thought that. So they said that they went to Howard Sackler to write this movie because he worked on the first script.

[Chris Ryan]

Uncredited.

[Sean Fennessey]

Uncredited. And was responsible for the Indianapolis speech. But I always thought that was John Milius who wrote the Indianapolis speech. So I don't really understand. What am I wrong about that?

[Chris Ryan]

I. I mean there's. I. I thought we said that too. I mean, this is also just like you're just reading the reporting about this stuff. So I'm not sure. But it. I thought. I thought Gottlieb was the one who was like, I can whip up a screenplay about the USS Indianapolis, but maybe I'm wrong. Either way, they should have made that movie. I can't believe they're not. I can't believe they're just.

[Sean Fennessey]

It's surprising. It's not happening now that Apple's not.

[Chris Ryan]

Not like, here's $500 million. Go make that movie.

[Sean Fennessey]

I agree.

[Bill Simmons]

They probably are making it with like Javier Bardem and Emma Stone.

[Sean Fennessey]

That sounds. Sounds awesome.

[Chris Ryan]

Why. But. But neither of them would be U.S. naval care.

[Bill Simmons]

They need two people.

[Sean Fennessey]

You want to photo because it's a woke Jaws prequel.

[Bill Simmons]

They've seen famous people in their photos.

[Chris Ryan]

The first Spaniard commanding a United States aircraft.

[Bill Simmons]

We'll work on that later. We'll CGI it.

[Sean Fennessey]

Did I ever tell you guys the story about the Portuguese man of war? You know what that is? It's a giant jellyfish. My uncle used to tell me this story. He served in Korea and he's talking about how there was a. Where he served in the area near the Philippines where he was serving. There were these giant jellyfish and you would have to like try to not never go in the water near them because they could kill you because they were so powerful. And I always thought it would be an amazing aspect of this version of the story where you'd be like. Like you'd have. You'd be beset on all sides by sharks and giant jellyfish. And like there would be like a lot of kill opportunities in this world instead of just like some kids on a dinghy stuck in the middle of Amity island where like.

[Bill Simmons]

Do you think There's a jellyfish movie in efficiency right now.

[Sean Fennessey]

I. I think. Yeah, it looks. They look cool.

[Chris Ryan]

We're not taking enough chances.

[Sean Fennessey]

They have no soul.

[Chris Ryan]

The big thing.

[Bill Simmons]

Well, I remember when they made Anaconda and I'm like, like, what the. Why are they doing this? This sounds stupid. I've seen it 10 times.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah, there's going to be a new one on Christmas. Paul Rudd and Jack Black, they're remaking Anaconda.

[Bill Simmons]

It's on the rewatchables list.

[Chris Ryan]

You know, there is a. There is a secret sequel connective tissue thing here. Because isn't the Indianapolis the boat that drops the. The bomb off for. For the Air Force in World War II? Right. Weren't they bringing the bomb to Japan?

[Sean Fennessey]

That sounds really.

[Bill Simmons]

Right.

[Chris Ryan]

So like Oppenheimer could have ended Pan. Right.

[Sean Fennessey]

That's great.

[Chris Ryan]

The USS Indianapolis is leaving. Chris Nolan.

[Sean Fennessey]

Chris Nolan presents Jaws 5, the prequel. That's a really good idea.

[Bill Simmons]

Let's get him on the phone. Is this movie better than Wayne Jenkins, Danny Trail, Doris Burke, Sam Jackson. No. Byron Mayo, Bernie Cousins, Tony Romo, Harling Ma. Chris Collinsworth, Daniel Plainview Long Legs or Wilford Brimley in the Firm?

[Chris Ryan]

Oh, no, I really was. I was really just thinking, mostly because of his pre. You know, his. His priors with doing a goddamn shark at me. Well, that's Dave Chappelle, but Sam Jackson just being like Mayor Larry got reelected. Like the one guy who's just commenting on. On actual civic politics.

[Sean Fennessey]

That's good. Yeah, that is good.

[Chris Ryan]

How the did that guy get reelected?

[Bill Simmons]

Do we need to bump any of these people from the list? We haven't done Harling Maze and Barney Cousins. Do they need to go? Need to add some new ones for the summer?

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah, we'll mix it up.

[Bill Simmons]

Maybe we add Jaws too.

[Chris Ryan]

Lady Jaws too.

[Bill Simmons]

Lady have just covered guesses.

[Sean Fennessey]

Do you think Doris Burke doing just the last lines of dialogue that Brody has. Oh, yeah. Where he's like. He's like. All right, you big bastard. Come on. I've got something for you now. That's it. Atta boy. Right here. Mr.

[Chris Ryan]

Jaws. Open wide. Open eyes. We see you, Mr.

[Sean Fennessey]

Jaws.

[Bill Simmons]

And Mike, Mr. Jaws is back and he's hungrier than ever.

[Chris Ryan]

Bonjour, Monsieur Jaws.

[Bill Simmons]

D.B.

[Sean Fennessey]

Had a boy. Mr. Jaws.

[Bill Simmons]

Just one Oscar. Who gets it? Let's just give this to John Williams. 30 of them. Sorry.

[Chris Ryan]

Never mind. I was just gonna be like. What if Shaq was like Jaws too? Couldn't hang. In my generation, these new shocks aren't physical. The way j.

[Bill Simmons]

The ocean was so much stronger back then.

[Chris Ryan]

We never took days off back when Jaws was.

[Sean Fennessey]

That doesn't even make sense.

[Bill Simmons]

It was so much harder to get those swimmers back then. Probably an answerable question.

[Sean Fennessey]

They should do Inside the NBA. But for movies like this, immediately when the movie ends, you cut to to Chuck and Kenny and they break down.

[Chris Ryan]

Chuck's like, I didn't watch it. Jack's just like, it was so much harder to make movies.

[Bill Simmons]

But.

[Chris Ryan]

Kenny's running to like, the. Do a diagram of the woman lighting herself on fire.

[Bill Simmons]

That'd be amazing if that's.

[Chris Ryan]

It's always there. It's always.

[Bill Simmons]

That's just what the show became. Inside the NBA. Cross with pop culture.

[Chris Ryan]

We couldn't get clips for the NBA, but we do have the Warner Brothers movie library.

[Sean Fennessey]

Oh, I would watch that.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah. They could do Angel. Wow.

[Sean Fennessey]

I don't know if I want a Kenny around that one.

[Bill Simmons]

Probably.

[Chris Ryan]

You could be a hooker by night.

[Bill Simmons]

And you can finish your schoolwork the next day. These girls, you can multitask. Nobody was judging.

[Chris Ryan]

None of these girls multitask anymore.

[Sean Fennessey]

Really good episode of this show.

[Bill Simmons]

All right. Probably an answerable question.

[Sean Fennessey]

I mean, who was funding? I guess it was Len, right? Funding Mayor Vaughn's campaign? Like, is that how he won?

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah, that's.

[Chris Ryan]

That's like just Len being like, you work.

[Sean Fennessey]

He bought the election.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah, I had. What did the final three of the Ms. Amity contest look like? We know Tina took at who was the runner up and did she hang out in the group? Or was it an outsider? Yeah, where was that?

[Chris Ryan]

Or is Tina kind of like a Mafio? So it was just like, no one else is running for this.

[Bill Simmons]

Were the town folk there? Like, can you imagine living in town? Like, what are you doing tonight? It's a Miss Amity contest. Imagine get to watch 17 year old girls walking around trying to become Miss Amity.

[Chris Ryan]

Hey, I'm gonna go to Miss Amity. Whatever you do, don't kiss my son. I'll never.

[Sean Fennessey]

No.

[Bill Simmons]

Miss Amity contest. That punch.

[Sean Fennessey]

It's a really good point. This is. You know, this trope.

[Bill Simmons]

They don't have these in real life. There's no misany in real life.

[Chris Ryan]

There's prom queen.

[Sean Fennessey]

But this trope is repeated in I Know what yout Did Last Summer because Sarah Michelle Gellar's character wins at the beginning of that. Which is an homage, I think, to.

[Chris Ryan]

This scene we haven't done. I Know what yout Did. Right?

[Craig Horlbeck]

No.

[Bill Simmons]

Martin C. Brody's 1975 man of the Year Award. Award as you see it, they should.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah. Was that.

[Bill Simmons]

Who finished second? Did they go to the award ceremony where they just, like, I have no chance this year. Brody, like, killed the show.

[Chris Ryan]

I mean, after Jaws 1, Martin Brody would be sully. He would just.

[Bill Simmons]

All he got was this little shitty plaque.

[Sean Fennessey]

But there's no.

[Bill Simmons]

He beat Larry Vaughn Jr. As the man of the Year.

[Sean Fennessey]

Here's my. Okay, here. This is a kind of a hot take.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

There's no proof of what Brody did.

[Chris Ryan]

Okay.

[Bill Simmons]

Oh, he comes back and he's like, yeah, I killed. But everybody died, but I killed the shark.

[Sean Fennessey]

No iPhones, no cameras, no photographs.

[Chris Ryan]

Hooper's like, yeah, it was incredible.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

But these two fucking crackpots who were out on the. Out on the big ocean going. Going sea crazy.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Craig Horlbeck]

But the shark goes away for three years the second he gets back.

[Sean Fennessey]

So sharks leave, sharks swim away.

[Craig Horlbeck]

It's very. That's great timing.

[Bill Simmons]

No, I think the point is, is how crazy the murder of the shark is. He's the only witness of it, right?

[Chris Ryan]

He shoots a.

[Bill Simmons]

He comes back. So. And then it came back, and then finally he had this thing in his mouth, and I aimed it, and I nailed it. And they were like.

[Chris Ryan]

He smiled. Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

You want to drink?

[Sean Fennessey]

Is Jaws just. Is. Is the entire Jaws series just a Martin Brody fever dream?

[Chris Ryan]

It's like, oh, yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah.

[Chris Ryan]

Or maybe. Maybe it's. It's Ellen thinking about what she wishes. Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yes. On a sleepless night in Amity.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

Ellen Brody imagines the husband she wishes.

[Bill Simmons]

She.

[Chris Ryan]

Like John Updike.

[Sean Fennessey]

That's right. It's beautiful.

[Bill Simmons]

Do you think American Psycho happened in real life? No, in the movie.

[Chris Ryan]

Is it. Is it a fantasy?

[Sean Fennessey]

I. I do think it's a fantasy.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

The chainsaw gives it away. When he whips the chainsaw like, 12 stories down, down.

[Sean Fennessey]

And it works.

[Chris Ryan]

Kills her.

[Bill Simmons]

And then we don't know how you.

[Sean Fennessey]

Ended up stepping on the American Psycho rewatchables out.

[Bill Simmons]

Should we do American Psycho?

[Craig Horlbeck]

Yeah, definitely.

[Bill Simmons]

Yes. Really?

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

Oh, man. That's a rewatchable.

[Sean Fennessey]

It's like a beloved classic.

[Craig Horlbeck]

I don't know if it's a rewatchable, but it's beloved.

[Chris Ryan]

Do you think Inception happens?

[Bill Simmons]

I might have watched it this week.

[Chris Ryan]

Like, how much of Inception I wish it didn't.

[Sean Fennessey]

Ayo. Yes.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah. I think some of it happens and some of it. It doesn't.

[Bill Simmons]

Any other unanswerables?

[Chris Ryan]

No. How is Larry still mayor?

[Bill Simmons]

What piece of memorabilia would you want or not want from this movie for? Sean? It's clear that the Gasoline can.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah. I would display it prominently.

[Bill Simmons]

I would want the Martin C. Brody 1975 man of the Year in Amityville Amity trophy.

[Sean Fennessey]

That's good. Not the barrel.

[Bill Simmons]

No, I'd want the trophy.

[Chris Ryan]

After. I would do the barrel. The planter barrel. Okay.

[Bill Simmons]

Coach Finstock aware. Best life lesson. Maybe believe the guy who was a prophetic hero three years before that something might be going on again. Maybe trust him for a split second.

[Sean Fennessey]

Now that 10 teenagers watched him murder another shark. His second shark murder. Yeah, he will.

[Chris Ryan]

He's.

[Sean Fennessey]

He's confirmed it's a shit.

[Chris Ryan]

I gotta watch the Revenge again and find out if there was ever any, like, legacy repair going on for me.

[Sean Fennessey]

On the COVID of Time magazine.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah, this would be like after OKC won the title, Presti made a deal and the fans were like, I don't know know about this Prestige. Best double feature choice is probably Jaws.

[Chris Ryan]

I'm gonna go Jaws revenge.

[Bill Simmons]

I'll go with Jaws. I'd go Jaws 1 and then Jaws 2.

[Chris Ryan]

I think Jaws the Revenge makes Jaws 2 look a little bit better.

[Sean Fennessey]

This made me. Because there's a lot of. There's been a lot of good shark movies. And I was thinking about this because, you know, know, Jurassic Park's coming out this week and there's like no good dinosaur movies. But why are, why do shark movies, like, always work?

[Chris Ryan]

Because you can, you can kind of hide it a little bit. Like a lot of it is tension.

[Bill Simmons]

You know, I think people have like six basic fears and this is one of them. To be in the water being unable to fight off something.

[Chris Ryan]

This is an unanswerable question. You're living in Amity after Jaws.

[Bill Simmons]

Would you still live there or how.

[Chris Ryan]

Long before you get in the water again?

[Craig Horlbeck]

That's how Jaws 2 should have started. It should have been like, this is the first day everyone's kind of decided.

[Chris Ryan]

To get back in the first summer. We're. We're back.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

I probably pretty soon, I would, I would guess for you, not for me personally, but I. I feel like people are like, ah, it's not going to happen. Not going to happen to me.

[Bill Simmons]

I mean, you're talking about a guy who used to ride a motorcycle without a helmet. Like 70 degrees in the. 70 miles an hour in the Mayor Parkway. Have a lot of. Of fear.

[Sean Fennessey]

You wrote a motorcycle.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

You had a motorcycle?

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

When was that?

[Bill Simmons]

When I was a kid.

[Sean Fennessey]

Like a Harley?

[Chris Ryan]

No, not like, like a Honda.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah, I had like one of those fast Hondas.

[Chris Ryan]

That's cool.

[Sean Fennessey]

Without a helmet.

[Bill Simmons]

Was cool until I crashed it. Yeah, he's like Bob Dylan.

[Sean Fennessey]

What the hell?

[Bill Simmons]

Didn't have a lot of fear back then.

[Sean Fennessey]

Is this like a known story?

[Bill Simmons]

I have a ton of fear now.

[Chris Ryan]

About driving?

[Bill Simmons]

No, just in general. You get older, you just fear stuff. Stuff.

[Sean Fennessey]

This is like your superhero origin story. You, like, crash this motorcycle and you're like, I'll be a sports columnist.

[Chris Ryan]

What if I took.

[Bill Simmons]

Someday I'll do it.

[Chris Ryan]

Put it against the NBA draft.

[Bill Simmons]

Someday I'll recap Jaws 2, figure out what the gas was doing.

[Chris Ryan]

We're just gonna take you to the hospital.

[Bill Simmons]

Who won the movie?

[Chris Ryan]

Worshider?

[Bill Simmons]

Roy Scheider. Yeah, I had Universal.

[Sean Fennessey]

Oh, that's a good answer. Yeah. Not Jinot Schwark.

[Bill Simmons]

No, he did not win the movie.

[Chris Ryan]

John Shark. No.

[Bill Simmons]

Who do you have?

[Sean Fennessey]

I would have said, you know, like, he saved this, this dog, baby, you know, this thing was headed for.

[Bill Simmons]

Didn't lead to anything.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah. You know what, though? I kind of also wish some TV games.

[Sean Fennessey]

Supergirl in 1984 with Helen Slater.

[Chris Ryan]

Oh, yeah. Love Helen.

[Bill Simmons]

Slave.

[Chris Ryan]

Later.

[Bill Simmons]

Fair is fair.

[Chris Ryan]

Legend of Billy Jean. Brother, Brother. One day. One day we'll do it. Keith Gordon. A great Keith Gordon performance in the Legend of Billie Jean.

[Bill Simmons]

You're not invited to that one.

[Sean Fennessey]

Good luck. Good luck with that one.

[Bill Simmons]

Craig, what did you think of Jaws 2?

[Chris Ryan]

Sure.

[Craig Horlbeck]

You know, in a vacuum, pretty good. Like if you didn't. If this movie was the first one to come out, I think it would be a quality shark slasher movie. You could make the case that if Jaws one didn't happen and this was the first one one that there's actually a More like a larger Jaws franchise.

[Sean Fennessey]

Oh, that might be what's holding it back. You know what I mean is that.

[Craig Horlbeck]

The original is so special quality of it. Made it so everybody didn't want anymore. But if Jaws 2 was the first one, maybe there's now 15 Jaws movies and it's like Final Destination in the water and it's a foundational slasher.

[Chris Ryan]

FD shark. When are we gonna get that?

[Sean Fennessey]

It's a great idea. I'm ready for that right now.

[Chris Ryan]

How have they not had a shark attack in Final Destination yet?

[Craig Horlbeck]

That's what Jaws could have been.

[Bill Simmons]

What were your after hours thoughts while we have you?

[Craig Horlbeck]

Yeah, I had never seen it. I had barely even heard of that movie. And I was kind of in awe at how good it was and just how tight and smart and funny and well acted. I mean, it's really, really good. And I didn't make A ton of money. I had never really heard of it.

[Sean Fennessey]

Do you think if it had just been Michael Keaton, it would have been a very famous movie?

[Craig Horlbeck]

Oh, it was supposed to be Keaton.

[Sean Fennessey]

No, we were just talking about like. Because Griffin Dunn is a really good actor, but he's not that he stars in it.

[Craig Horlbeck]

No, I didn't even. What else has he done?

[Chris Ryan]

I don't.

[Craig Horlbeck]

I haven't listened to the POD yet.

[Sean Fennessey]

London.

[Craig Horlbeck]

Yeah, yeah, probably. Yeah. But did Scorsese specifically want him? Was that.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah, he was a producer.

[Sean Fennessey]

He brought it to him.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah.

[Craig Horlbeck]

Yeah. I. It just. I think it feels kind of watching it, I was like, this feels so small and random for. For who I know Scorsese to be now. Which is kind of fun. It's. I mean it's kind of. It's not really, in my opinion. And I don't think it's about a whole lot. It's just like a crazy night in New York and it's kind of fun to see a prestige director do something like that and just have fun for 90 minutes. And it's not some big grand story of the rise and fall of a Jordan Belfort or Henry Hill or something like that. It's just like, yeah, scorsese cooking for 90 minutes in New York in the 80s.

[Chris Ryan]

It's fun.

[Bill Simmons]

We said that on the pod. That we just wish directors did that more.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah, yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

Like blowout fucking.

[Craig Horlbeck]

Like, I just like stuff like that.

[Bill Simmons]

That cr. You. You missed after hours because you were away.

[Chris Ryan]

I was.

[Craig Horlbeck]

Can I also.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah.

[Craig Horlbeck]

One big thing that stuck out about just like the time people lived in, in the after hours era was man, people were just really comfortable with strangers.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah. You just pick up the phone, every scene is.

[Craig Horlbeck]

Is him running up to a new person and they're like, come on in.

[Bill Simmons]

Right.

[Craig Horlbeck]

What do you need a phone?

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah, no problem.

[Craig Horlbeck]

Come on up. It's three in the morning.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah. That's how you still operate though.

[Chris Ryan]

Anybody wants to knock on my door? I got actually.

[Sean Fennessey]

What's your address? Just give it out here.

[Chris Ryan]

Well, you know what's funny is the other night before we left, do you know about this tick tock trend where kids pull up and kick your door? Have you heard about that?

[Sean Fennessey]

What?

[Bill Simmons]

No.

[Chris Ryan]

You have heard about this? No. Well, they did it to my house.

[Sean Fennessey]

No way.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah, it was pretty scary. Not scary. What do you mean?

[Craig Horlbeck]

What do you mean kick your door?

[Chris Ryan]

They. They pull up to a stop, they jump out and they like kick on your door really hard and then run back to the car.

[Craig Horlbeck]

So it's like a up doorbell ditch.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah, but they're like filming it, I guess or whatever.

[Craig Horlbeck]

And they wait.

[Chris Ryan]

So I came out completely nude with a machete, you know, watching Josh doing here.

[Craig Horlbeck]

He came out, nobody was up. A jug of gasoline.

[Chris Ryan]

Did this just happen two weeks ago? Yeah.

[Craig Horlbeck]

Did you hear they're probably not a.

[Chris Ryan]

Big stranger guy anymore now, you know.

[Craig Horlbeck]

Did you see the kids drive away?

[Chris Ryan]

I heard him, but they.

[Craig Horlbeck]

So they weren't filming you?

[Chris Ryan]

Well, no, they were. I think they filmed the kick. But they drove away before.

[Bill Simmons]

See, I was shooting at them like Chef Brody. Cheap Birdie shooting at the blue fish. Give us your after hours thoughts really quick.

[Chris Ryan]

It's one of my favorite Scorsese. One of the best New York movies ever made and a great portrait of a crazy night out.

[Bill Simmons]

Did you ever have an after hours night?

[Chris Ryan]

Some. Not like as magical as that, but I had some late nights, yeah.

[Bill Simmons]

Cigarette nights?

[Chris Ryan]

You could say that, yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

You want to.

[Chris Ryan]

I wound up encased in plaster.

[Bill Simmons]

What was the weirdest part of New York City you ended up up in?

[Chris Ryan]

That's a good question.

[Sean Fennessey]

You never had like a. Woke up in Staten Island?

[Craig Horlbeck]

No, I never had.

[Chris Ryan]

Oh, I. I mean I've fallen asleep and woken up at the end of the F train where I like.

[Sean Fennessey]

Oh, I have done that too.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

That's not.

[Bill Simmons]

Where does that end?

[Chris Ryan]

The beach. And then it gets really like a. Christ. Now I have to get out and get back on the F train. It's going to take all night to get home.

[Bill Simmons]

Oh, Jesus.

[Chris Ryan]

Like 3:00am In Coney Island.

[Bill Simmons]

It's like the end of the world warriors.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah. Or the beginning. If I had gotten off that train.

[Sean Fennessey]

Yeah, that did happen to me too. That's funny you say that.

[Bill Simmons]

Yeah.

[Sean Fennessey]

Fiorentino.

[Chris Ryan]

One of the goats.

[Bill Simmons]

That's it.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah. I mean you guys did a great job on it. I was just.

[Bill Simmons]

You said she was a throw your life away hall of famer.

[Chris Ryan]

She is. She is in this movie. She's a little intimidating, to be completely honest. She's a little unattainable. Not that she's attainable in like Last Seduction, but do you think she'd do.

[Sean Fennessey]

Good things for your life Life if were you. Different time with her at any time really in history.

[Chris Ryan]

Yeah, I think she probably would have gotten me on the right track earlier in my career. You know, who knows what I would have gotten up to by then.

[Bill Simmons]

Would have kept Chris away from Pelicano.

[Sean Fennessey]

I'm still getting over her dating the FBI agent in Pelicano.

[Chris Ryan]

It's awesome. When stuff like that.

[Sean Fennessey]

That's one of the craziest things I've ever heard. It's that and the girl with the gas tank. Those are the two. Those are my two legends. I've never seen such magical moves.

[Bill Simmons]

Thanks to Craig. Correct throwback Jack Sanders. Thanks to Ronick as well. Sierra, Sean, see you next time.