Week 3 Recap: Philly’s Block, Cleveland Shock, Caleb Crushes Cowboys, Undefeated Colts, and Sit Down Jason Garrett

Summary

The Ringer Fantasy Football Show

Episode: Week 3 Recap – Philly’s Block, Cleveland Shock, Caleb Crushes Cowboys, Undefeated Colts, and Sit Down Jason Garrett
Hosts: Danny Heifetz, Danny Kelly, Craig Horlbeck
Date: September 22, 2025

---

Overview

This Week 3 Recap episode dives into the NFL’s chaos-filled Sunday, focusing on wild finishes, fantasy fallout, and hard truths for teams and managers. Heifetz, Kelly, and Horlbeck break down the Giants-Chiefs prime time slog, historic special teams performances, shaky quarterback play from former darlings, the Colts’ transformation under Daniel Jones, Caleb Williams’ emergence, and more. The show’s tone is irreverent, passionate, and biting as they oscillate between fandom agony and sharp football insight.

---

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Sunday Night Football – Giants vs. Chiefs: Russ’s Rock Bottom

Timestamps: 01:13–11:56

• Russell Wilson’s meltdown:

  • The Giants’ game was described as "an abomination" and possibly Wilson’s last competent NFL outing.
  • Four-play goal-line sequence: Wilson throws three out-of-bounds passes with no real attempt to make a play.
    • Quote: "That was the worst I’ve ever seen... What is the point of having a veteran quarterback?" — Heifetz (04:08)
  • Greg jokes: "He was just doing crossbar drills, man." (04:04)
  • The only joy for Giants fans this year is rookie RB Cam Scadaboo:
    • "Scadaboo had more yards than the rest of the Giants with 10 minutes left in the game." — Heifetz (05:02)
  • Blake Neighbors lost in the shuffle; team building and Dable’s situational decisions are under fire.

• Mahomes’ heroics and fumbles:

  • Mahomes pulled off a fumble recovery on a broken play, reminiscent of Andrew Luck.
    • Quote: "Mahomes screamed out of nowhere, just took the ball away from the Giants. It was like something you imagine doing as a kid..." — Heifetz (09:05)
  • Chiefs offense looked rough overall, but avoided an 0-3 start.

---

2. Special Teams – A Wrecking Ball Sunday

Timestamps: 12:15–15:12

• A historic day for blocks and returns:
  • Multiple games ended or swung on blocked field goals or punts (Browns, Eagles, Jets, Seahawks).
  • Quote: "This was an all-time special teams day. Never seen anything like it." — Kelly (12:25)
  • Eagles’ DT Jordan Davis blocks and returns a Rams kick for a game-winning TD.
  • Jets and Seahawks also return blocked kicks for TDs within minutes of one another.
  • Theories abound for why this is happening more frequently (rules, athlete specialization, formations, etc.).

---

3. Philly’s Comeback & The Rams Collapse

Timestamps: 15:13–24:54

• Eagles’ second-half surge:
  • Overcome a 19-point second-half deficit (first since DeSean Jackson’s Miracle at the Meadowlands).
  • A.J. Brown dominates after halftime; Hurts erupts for 200+ passing yards, 3 TDs in second half.
  • "Eagles should start every game down 20." — Horlbeck (17:24)
  • Lane Johnson's absence derailed the Eagles' offense for six drives, then Fred Johnson’s insertion flipped the switch.
  • Eagles’ defense blocks both Rams’ late drives to seal the win.
• Personality watch:
  • Jalen Hurts is psycho-stoic on the sideline during the winning kick, prompting lighthearted debate:
    • "He needs to enjoy life a little more." — Kelly (24:37)
    • "He's him, though, he’s sold his soul for whatever." — Heifetz (24:41)
• Eagles fans should be encouraged by the offensive explosion after a tepid September.

---

4. Caleb Williams & Bears Offense – Highs and Shrugs

Timestamps: 25:30–31:13

• Caleb Williams dominates a crumbling Cowboys defense:
  • Resounding stat line: 300 yards, 4 TDs, no sacks — but Cowboys D is “the worst in the NFL.”
  • Craig’s “Is the stripper into me, or is this just her job?” analogy questions the quality of Caleb's opposition and how much we should buy the hype.
    • "She just happens to be great at her job...but she likes you." — Heifetz (27:13)
  • Ben Johnson’s scheming is lauded for getting weapons open.
  • Williams’ tangible growth as a rookie, but bigger judgment reserved until he faces better opposition.

---

5. The Colts Go Nuclear

Timestamps: 42:29–50:03

• Daniel Jones, Jonathan Taylor, and the Shane Steichen Offense:
  • Colts and Jones compared to 2007 Patriots for offensive efficiency ("punted less than five times in three games; only the 2007 Pats did that").
  • Quote: "It’s the 2007 Patriots and the 2025 Colts. That's the level of offensive destruction." — Heifetz (43:14)
  • Jonathan Taylor is (back to) elite — first in rushing, after-contact yards, scrimmage, and TDs, per Kelly.
  • Daniel Jones lauded for quick-release, low-sack rate, but injury risks from his running style linger.
  • Titans called out for atrocious vibes: "They didn't want to play today." — Michael Pittman Jr. (51:08)
  • Brian Callahan lambasted for clock mismanagement before halftime (52:17): "One of the worst coaching things I’ve seen all year." — Heifetz

---

6. Losers: The Texans & Trevor Lawrence Era of Excuses

Timestamps: 33:00–42:24

• Texans & Jags offenses – Beyond concerning:
  • Stroud and Trevor Lawrence compared unfavorably to backup QBs; neither team can string together offense.
  • "The Texans are the only team the last 20 seasons to start 0-3 despite giving up fewer than 55 points." — Kelly citing Dante Koplowitz-Fleming (34:57)
  • Both QBs are among bottom 3 in EPA/play since 2024 (along with Joe Flacco).
• Lawrence’s flaws:
  • Accuracy, hospital balls, and endless drops plague the Jags. Five more drops in this game.
  • Quote: "He’s big, athletic, but not accurate. That’s why everyone makes the hospital ball jokes." — Horlbeck (39:31)
• Travis Hunter fantasy update:
  • Disappointment on both sides of the ball — limited targets, invisible usage.

---

7. Cleveland Browns – Defensive Wagon Returns

Timestamps: 55:38–60:06

• Browns snatch a win from the Packers (13–10) with a blocked FG and a redemption arc for embattled kicker Andre Szmyt.
  • Quote: "For him to do that after losing his mother and all the jokes about his name? That's awesome." — Heifetz (59:06)
• Defense first in sack rate, first downs allowed, and more. Mason Graham (rookie DT) highlighted for major impact.
  • "Cleveland is allowing 19 yards per drive, best in the league." — Austin via DK (59:53)

---

8. Raiders, Falcons, and Other Miscellany

Timestamps: 60:12–79:43

• Raiders offense a mess; Genti and Bowers can’t overcome OL woes.
• Falcons and Michael Penix Jr. reach ‘Do Not Start’ status: "Goose egg against Carolina – that's a shart." — Kelly (77:55)
• "Michael Penix is 0-4 when the other team scores 7 points." (79:03)

---

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments (with Timestamps)

• "What is the point of having a veteran quarterback if he has no situational awareness?" — Heifetz (04:08)
• "This was an all-time special teams day. Never seen anything like it." — Kelly (12:25)
• "Mahomes just took the ball away from the Giants. It was like what you imagine as a kid." — Heifetz (09:05)
• "Eagles need to start every game like they're down 20." — Horlbeck (17:24)
• "She just happens to be great at her job...but she likes you." [On doubts about Caleb Williams’ breakout] — Heifetz (27:13)
• "Colts and Daniel Jones – that’s the 2007 Patriots level of destruction." — Heifetz (43:14)
• "It’s the only thing we have to do — build Stonehenge. I feel like we could figure that out." — Heifetz, tangent (113:12)
• "Cleveland is allowing 19 yards per drive, best in the league." — Kelly relaying Austin's stat (59:53)
• "Andre Szmyt missed after his mom died, everyone called him 'Andre shit', and now he hits the game-winner." — Heifetz (59:06)

---

Fantasy Awards, Debates & Segments

Fart or Shart – Panic Button Edition

Timestamps: 71:49–79:52

• Marvin Harrison Jr. drops: Is it a blip (fart) or fundamental issue (shart)?
  Kelly: Fart. "He’s still gonna be fine." Heifetz/Horlbeck: For his draft capital, it’s a shart.
• Michael Penix Jr.: Reinforced shart — last in EPA from a clean pocket.

Burn Book

Timestamps: 106:02–109:16

• Mark Andrews, Jalen Waddle, and now—Isaiah Pacheco:
  • "If you're 1–2 or 1–3, we can't recommend playing him. He's burn book’d." — Heifetz (109:11)

---

Quick-Hit Timestamps for Major Segments

• 01:13 — Giants/Chiefs and Russ’s disaster
• 12:15 — Special teams chaos
• 15:13 — Eagles/Rams comeback
• 25:30 — Caleb Williams v. Cowboys
• 33:00 — Texans/Jags misery
• 42:29 — Colts offensive rampage
• 55:38 — Browns defensive dominance
• 71:49 — Fart or Shart: Marvin Harrison Jr.
• 77:00 — Fart or Shart: Michael Penix Jr.
• 106:02 — Burn Book: Isaiah Pacheco
• 114:00–120:35 — Off-rails tangents (Stonehenge, LeBron-as-javelin thrower, human evolution)

---

Tone & Language

• Candid, sarcastic, and often exasperated—especially in the face of coaching incompetence and fantasy chicanery.
• The show is equal parts smart analysis, comedic despair, and wildly off-track late-night energy.

---

Other Memorable Tangents

• Long riffs on evolution, toilets, and standing up ("I think we haven't been bipedal long enough to not feel weird about it." — Heifetz, 98:03)
• Deep-dive into the trivia of Jerry Rice longevity and dominance (89:12–91:26)
• Jason Garrett’s halftime show presence vigorously mocked.
• "Sit down, Jason Garrett!" – recurring, encapsulating how fans should treat stale TV coverage.

---

Summary Takeaway

This podcast was a brisk, funny, and bracing look at how quickly fortunes can turn—for NFL teams and fantasy rosters alike. Through a haze of block kicks, QB implosions, rookie letdowns, and offensive geniuses, the hosts tell you who to trust, who to bench, and who to laugh at—providing the perfect weekly therapy and insight for obsessive fantasy football players.

---

Want to suggest a burn book entry, weigh in on Fart or Shart, or explain the origins of toilet paper? Email [e-mail].

Transcript

[Danny Kelly]

Foreign.

[Danny Heifetz]

Welcome to the ringer fantasy football show. My name is Danny Hyperts and I'm joined by Danny Kelly and Greg Horbeck and we are going through all the games after Sunday of week three. We're also going to go through that godforsaken Sunday night football game between the giants and Chiefs that just every single time the giants play football, especially in prime time, my love for this game just bleeds out of me. I just lose a little bit of joy for life every single time I see the giants play. Reminder emails for trivia for waivers for our Monday episode. Emails for fantasy court cases for the Wednesday episode. And later this week, we'll be in Dublin, Ireland because we're going to the Vikings Steelers game because we were like, man, Carson Wentz, Aaron Rodgers can't miss it. So we're going to that and follow us on Instagram and YouTube and we'll be posting a bunch of stuff from Dublin. Right, Craig?

[Greg Horbeck]

That's right. Are we doing the intro portion right now or we are we in the main show?

[Danny Heifetz]

The intro. Like we have to go to an ad now.

[Greg Horbeck]

Okay.

[Danny Heifetz]

Yeah.

[Greg Horbeck]

All right. Well, everybody, no, we have a great show coming up. Stick around. I don't know what the band is yet, but they are here. If they are back to be a surprise one. Stick around. SNL should do that.

[Danny Kelly]

We'll be right back.

[Danny Heifetz]

This episode of the ringer fantasy football show is presented by Hyundai. The all new Hyundai Palisade hybrid proves that an incredible SUV is so much more than than the sum of its parts. It's more than a spacious interior. It's more than being able to navigate difficult terrain. And it's way more than driving farther than you ever thought possible. It's the all new Hyundai Palisade hybrid. So much more than just another SUV. Visit Hyundai USA.com or call 562-314-4603 for more details. Okay, we're going to go through all the games in week three, starting with Sunday football. What an abomination. I literally never want to see Russell Wilson play football again.

[Danny Kelly]

I don't want to do it square one.

[Greg Horbeck]

This was the most predictable take that I like. Of course, this week.

[Danny Kelly]

Three.

[Greg Horbeck]

Absolutely. Like, we knew this was coming after the 450 yard game against the Cowboys. We knew it. This is Russ in a nutshell. This is the whole Russ experience in three weeks.

[Danny Kelly]

You got it.

[Danny Heifetz]

I, I, I'm, I'm excited because you know what, we got it out of the way early because I have to tell you, like again, last week I get a lot of stuff wrong. But I will be like, you know what? That last week was the last good game Russell Wilson will ever have. And I, I, I don't want to be dramatic. I know sometimes I'm a little hyperbolic. I think what Russell Wilson did at the end of this Giants Chiefs game is among the worst four play sequences I've ever seen from an NFL quarterback.

[Greg Horbeck]

Talking about the. In the end zone.

[Danny Heifetz]

Yeah, in the end zone. And like he had such, Russ had such an up and down game. I mean up, I'm like two ups and like 25 downs. But, but they're, they, they're down like they're down 15 points. They're at the goal line three and a half minutes. It is doable. The Giants time the game was super doable. It's like you get a touchdown, you get a stop, you get the ball back. It was not impossible.

[Greg Horbeck]

This episode is supported by FX Is the Lowdown starring Ethan Hawke. Allow us to introduce you to Lee Raybon, a quirky journalist slash rare bookstore owner slash unofficial truth seeker who is always on the tail of his latest conspiracy.

[Danny Heifetz]

This time, his most recent expose puts him head to head with a powerful.

[Greg Horbeck]

Family that rules Tulsa. Meaning only one thing. He must be onto something big. FX is the lowdown.

[Danny Heifetz]

Premiere September 23rd on FX, stream on Hulu. And they get down there. Russell Wilson throws the ball away in first down into the tunnel. Andy Reid correctly lobbies for a intentional grounding. It was 100% intentional grounding. Scrambles up the middle on second down. Undoing the time save from the first down.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah.

[Danny Heifetz]

Throws the ball away on third down. Throws the ball away on fourth down.

[Danny Kelly]

The fourth down play was reminiscent of Derek Carr. I'm wondering if he'll retire after that.

[Danny Heifetz]

He should. Like at least rookie like even Will Levis can say he was trying something. Russell Wilson literally gave up on three.

[Danny Kelly]

Of the four plays that it wasn't even close. It didn't, it wasn't near anyone. It hit the crossbar of the frickin field.

[Greg Horbeck]

He was doing drills. They were down by a lot. He was like, I'm going to see if I can hit the crossbar.

[Danny Heifetz]

What is the point of Russell Wilson doing all his little drills on air for the Sunday football squad if he does not have the situational awareness to not throw the ball away on first, third and fourth down? What is the point of having a veteran quarterback? He's never been situationally aware ever. But that was the worst I've ever seen.

[Greg Horbeck]

The point of, of having Russell Wilson is just so Jackson Dart can sit on the bench and learn the playbook and learn the NFL. That's the only reason why Russ is there.

[Danny Kelly]

There's no other point.

[Danny Heifetz]

So glad Darts learned to hand off on the five read options. We bring him in each game. Whatever. The only light in my life is Cam Scabo. Even Blake Neighbors looks like he already wants out of this goddamn team. Sco is the only good thing in my life. He's better than Ashton Genty and that's the spot, the lie.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah, he does look great. I can't get over the number 44 on him.

[Greg Horbeck]

It's perfect for him. He nailed it. Honestly, he did. If he was 21, that wouldn't make sense.

[Danny Kelly]

I wish he was just 44.

[Danny Heifetz]

The only better number would be 0 or 99. Scott Scottaboo, with less than 10 minutes left in the game, had more yards than the rest of the Giants combined.

[Danny Kelly]

Oh yeah, there was a graphic. It was like scatter boo. 120 scrimmage yards. The rest of the team a hundred or something.

[Greg Horbeck]

Yeah, I it almost feels like with the Giants. It's funny. My I'm with my in laws right now and one of the two brother, one of Liz's two brothers is a Giants fan and he was just watching the game.

[Danny Heifetz]

Like with his never come up.

[Greg Horbeck]

Yeah.

[Danny Kelly]

How has this not come up?

[Greg Horbeck]

I don't know. He's a Giants fan and he was like he was just watching the game.

[Danny Heifetz]

You were, you know what, we'll do this later. But this has been six years. This has never come up. But okay, whatever.

[Greg Horbeck]

And he was like, God, he was like every team can get better in the draft except mine. And he's like, that's just how it is. Every team can rebuild in the draft.

[Danny Heifetz]

Except I will say the Giants have like Abdul Carter is clearly good. Scatter Boo's clearly good. Neighbors is clearly good. I can't wait to fire all these people. And then we have those people. I hope dart doesn't suck, but I, I it's little things with Dable that drive me nuts. I don't know what happened. Graham Godota night the kicker, but. But this is two Septembers in a row. The Giants kicker Graham G got hurt before the game and the Giants didn't have another kicker in the practice squad to activate. This happened last year in Washington when they couldn't kick. Like how has this happen? Also why can't punters make a 25 yard field goal?

[Danny Kelly]

I get why this whole thing again. Yeah.

[Danny Heifetz]

Why can't punters make a field goal. I understand why you can't make a 50 yard field goal. I watch these kids on college game day when Pat McAfee throws 50 grand. These kids practice for a week, they make a 30 yard field goal. These punters can't make a 25 yard field goal.

[Greg Horbeck]

They should pay him 50 grand. Isn't that more than they make? Should offer that to them. Maybe they'll make it.

[Danny Kelly]

Maybe had Cam Scaboo do it. I feel like he could have done it.

[Greg Horbeck]

Do you think Hyp? I think there was a the movie, I think it came out this weekend called him which is like a sports horror film that Jordan Peele produced. And I'm pretty sure the premise of this movie, we're giving it free advertising. I'm pretty sure the premise of this movie is like you sell your soul to the devil to be good at a sport. It almost feels like the Giants winning two Super Bowls against the Patriots with Eli Manning. The deal was, hey, we'll give you these two. We'll tarnish Tom Brady's legacy. Eli Manning will go down in history as one of the most unbelievable quarterback runs, beating Tom Brady twice. But for that you will then have the most miserable 15 years of in the history of football afterwards.

[Danny Kelly]

50 Heifetz would take that in a heart.

[Danny Heifetz]

I agree. I just wish I had been smart enough to sell high and like 18 years old. I'm going to stop caring about the Giants. I wish I had just been able to stop. I will the Giant. So the Giants lost this game 22 to 9. Even when the Giants score a touchdown they make it look like they didn't. But I will say Mahomes in this game is interesting. The Chiefs won. Honestly, I won't be like save their season but now they're 1 and 2 going to play the Ravens instead of oh and 3 going to play the Ravens next week. And Mahomes. The Chiefs looked bad and yet Mahomes made Taekwond Thornton look awesome. Had a crazy sequence where he threw two balls to Taekwond Thornton in the same spot on the goal line and like almost back to back plays. He had a 60 yard bomb drawing a pass interference. But honestly play of the season. So it just in term not play the season, maybe not even the play of the day but a play that if the Chiefs squeak into the playoffs by one game we will remember is Mahomes stealing the fumble.

[Danny Kelly]

Oh my God.

[Danny Heifetz]

From Bobby. Okay, that was crazy.

[Danny Kelly]

So for context if you missed it, this was the second time in the Game that Mahomes had thrown it backwards.

[Greg Horbeck]

What the hell was he doing? Twice. He did it twice.

[Danny Kelly]

If you look at the replay of the second one, I believe Pacheco legitimately is facing towards the other team's end zone. Like he's facing the wrong direction.

[Greg Horbeck]

He had to turn like 220 degrees.

[Danny Kelly]

To see Mahomes turn left or something. He was facing the completely wrong direction. Anyway, bottom line is Mahomes skipped it to him. It's obviously a fumble because it's a backwards pass. Pacheco does the like Keystone Cops thing, trying to figure out where it went. He's turning around.

[Danny Heifetz]

Pacheco, he was fine. He didn't do anything wrong.

[Danny Kelly]

Dude, Pacheco was pissing me off in this game. Anyway, it gets picked up by the Giants almost or like very briefly picked up. And then Mahomes screams in out of the corner of the screen and just takes the ball away from home.

[Danny Heifetz]

Did the thing that when you're a kid kind of playing football and air in your head in like the hallway or whatever that you think you would do if you were in a football game, I would just take the ball from him right when he picked it up.

[Greg Horbeck]

I mean this seriously. I think that's the best play I've seen Mahomes make in like two years.

[Danny Heifetz]

You're probably right. It was some Andrew Luck. It was like Andrew Luck would have done that, like fumble by accident and then just hit the middle linebacker on the other team. So already take.

[Greg Horbeck]

I mean, you know how hard it is to strip, like to. To tackle somebody and strip the ball and retain it and go to the ground. Like he did all of that in one motion on a defensive end running towards the end zone to save the game.

[Danny Heifetz]

I think it. No, I think it was the line. But regardless, it's the linebacker. Linebacker for the Giants. The same thing. But like, I. I just again, can't stress enough. I know the giants lost by 13, so it feels like not consequential. At the time, it was literally the difference between the game being 13 to 6 at halftime or the Chiefs having the lead 9 to 6. Like Mahomes stopped the touchdown and took the ball back and then ended up the Giant. It's whatever, man. The Giants suck. But like, it was pretty amazing.

[Danny Kelly]

So I keep forgetting how locked in you are about the Giants because like, the whole time we were watching, I was watching this game. I'm like, God, this is so boring.

[Greg Horbeck]

We can over soon. No, we can move on. Get the Chiefs off my fucking screen.

[Danny Heifetz]

We can move on. I'll just say two things. Everyone else is like, still putting Giants Cowboys Sunday to football. Don't you wish that last week had been on Sunday Night Football instead of this schlep? Also, the Giants are the only team I've ever seen who put their left tackle and their kicker on a snap count. It would look I. I pulled Andrew Thomas. They pull him at the end of the first half and I'm like, if they hadn't, I wouldn't have thought anything about of it if Collinsworth hadn't said they're going to do it. And so he's out there and they're like, he must be in pain. He's smiling, he's laughing on the sideline. Immediately Russell Wilson gets hit for and then left tackle gives up his and then Russell Wilson, like, immediately gets hit and I'm just like, whatever. I. Whatever.

[Greg Horbeck]

I have an intrusive thought before we move on. We don't need to spend a lot of time on this.

[Danny Heifetz]

Yeah. Let's just go on.

[Greg Horbeck]

Well, can I give you my quick, intrusive thought?

[Danny Heifetz]

Sure.

[Greg Horbeck]

It just feels pretty easy to eliminate a number one wide receiver like Malik. Neighbors was just not a part of the game gone. Just wasn't in the game. He had two catches for 13 yards and they were like in the fourth quarter and it was basically just like, he's not in the game. And then Chris Collinsworth is like, yeah, they put a guy below and on top of. And so it's really hard to throw to him. They did it to A.J. brown in that first Eagles game. I just. The Cowboys did. Who have a terrible defense, and yet they just managed to eliminate A.J. brown from the game. It just seems very easy, and I don't know why teams don't do that every single time. When you're playing a good wide receiver.

[Danny Kelly]

You have to have a good number two. Like the Giants don't have a good number two.

[Danny Heifetz]

Again, the Giants gave Darius Slayton the Saquon Barkley money. They gave Darius Slayton three years for 36 million, and then he's barely done anything.

[Greg Horbeck]

If I'm playing the Texans, like, I feel like every defense could make it. So Nico Collins has 20 catches this entire season. If you just do that to him.

[Danny Heifetz]

Every game, well, he kind of does. Neighbors has two catches for 13 yards, and if you had him on your fantasy team, you'll be like, I didn't even know he had that. Two catches for 13.

[Greg Horbeck]

Two catches, one dislocated elbow.

[Danny Heifetz]

Yeah. Honestly, genuinely, Neighbors got more screen time for being injured in this game than having like the football. But to your it's funny though what you're saying. I think that it's you're able to do it to a team like the Giants when they can't run or throw to other people.

[Greg Horbeck]

Well, they did it to A.J. brown, but yeah, not the Giants, but the cow, you know.

[Danny Heifetz]

Yeah, the Eagles won that game though.

[Greg Horbeck]

It was close.

[Danny Heifetz]

Let's get to the other winners or losers. Speaking of the Eagles, I I actually before we get to the Eagles though, I actually just want to give I think the big winner of the day honestly is special teams.

[Danny Kelly]

This was an all time special teams day.

[Greg Horbeck]

Messy, messy day.

[Danny Kelly]

Never seen anything like it.

[Danny Heifetz]

Just to recap so and especially if you didn't see all these games today but even if you did, can't really keep track of it all so the packers line up for a game winning field goal. The Browns block it and then the Browns go and kick a 55 yarder walk off win.

[Danny Kelly]

The Browns beat the Packers.

[Danny Heifetz]

Browns beat the Packers 13 to 10 with a much closer 55 yard field goal from the kicker who missed the four points of kicks in week one. And that's a great story. We get to it later the same time this is happening with the Browns packers thing literally at the simultaneously the Rams lineup for a game winning field goal. The Eagles block it, return it for a touchdown walk off win. Jordan Davis locks it and recovers it and returns it the whole way.

[Danny Kelly]

He he was running fast too.

[Danny Heifetz]

Second straight drive.

[Greg Horbeck]

He ran 18 and a half miles an hour.

[Danny Heifetz]

Big guys can a defensive tackle also the the Eagles blocked the final two Rams drives. Both ended at a block field goal. Five minutes later the jets block a field goal and return it for a touchdown. And Will McDonald, he also blocked it, recovered it and returned it all himself which is like pretty rare actually. And it was fucking weird to see it happen twice in five minutes. Five minutes later the Seahawks return their first punt return touchdown in 10 years. And then they also block a punt. They also blocked a punt. The Saints had not allowed a punt block since 2011. The Saints have got 220 straight punts without a punt block.

[Greg Horbeck]

Wow.

[Danny Heifetz]

Then Jalen Lana Washington at a 90 yard punt return for a touchdown. Debo Samuel almost returned the opening Washington kick for a touchdown when the Niners and Chargers in the later window were both lining up for game winners as time expired. I kind of just was weirded out when neither of them were blocked. They both made the kick but oh, nine touchdowns today on defensive special Teams. Dk. I. I can't remember a day where special teams was not only such a big theme for the day, but happening at the end. It was all at the same time.

[Danny Kelly]

Is it. This is like my ignorance of special teams, but our team's doing something different this year on field goal and punt kicks or like just formations or whatever because it feels like we've had way more this season than normal.

[Danny Heifetz]

And don't forget the leverage thing too, where the Broncos coach things flip. Last week we had another call. I don't know. I just kind of think.

[Greg Horbeck]

It feels.

[Danny Kelly]

Like it's easier than ever to get through and block a kick. I don't know.

[Danny Heifetz]

I just think there's a bunch of like crazy athletes that are on.

[Danny Kelly]

The Ravens almost blocked that game. The. The first week of the season or whatever. When was it? The Bills. Ravens. The Bills kicked a game winning field goal. The.

[Danny Heifetz]

Kyle Hamilton should have had it.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah. Kyle Hamilton like was standing in front of the kicker and just missed.

[Danny Heifetz]

I. I do think that the. There are probably just more NFL players that are capable of just jumping over other NFL players cleanly than we've probably.

[Danny Kelly]

Maybe special teams. New golden age, I guess.

[Danny Heifetz]

I don't know. It's pretty insane. However, obviously the best of them all was the Eagles, which was.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah, also that was tough.

[Danny Heifetz]

Crazy game.

[Danny Kelly]

Backdoor cover. We lost our bet.

[Danny Heifetz]

Yes.

[Greg Horbeck]

Honestly, one of the worst backdoor covers of all time. We had the fucking Rams plus three and a half. Just feeling great the entire game. I pushed you guys to make this bet. It was 26 to 7. I felt like a genius even at the end. I was like, I can't lose. Like there's no way we lose this even.

[Danny Kelly]

There's only one way that you can move.

[Greg Horbeck]

Like there's no chance. They block and return it for a touchdown.

[Danny Kelly]

This is like the doctor Strange thing. There's one way in which we can lose this fucking bet. Yeah. Seven billion options.

[Greg Horbeck]

Dk. Are the Eagles your winner of the day?

[Danny Kelly]

They are indeed. A.J. brown. Jalen hurts. It wasn't looking good going into the half in this game. The Eagles were down big early on and Jalen hurts at halftime. He had like single digit yards passing. I can't remember off the top of my head, but it was like really, really bad. They couldn't move the ball. The only thing they'd done was a tush push touchdown. Which of course people are going to talk about because again on the replay you showed that they were. The guards were false starting early.

[Danny Heifetz]

They false started. It didn't didn't call and they didn't.

[Danny Kelly]

Call emphasis this week, by the way. The Saints got called for that in the Seahawks game, so they. They're going to just call everybody but the Eagles. Apparently it's rigged for sure.

[Greg Horbeck]

It felt like the Eagles thing happened and then the game ended and then the NFL told the referees, hey, that should have been a false start. So then they, you know, they applied that to the next round of games.

[Danny Kelly]

Right.

[Danny Heifetz]

What was incredible about that tush push was Lane Johnson, the right tackle for the Eagles, who's like the best right tackle in the NFL, and he got a stinger on that play and he left the game. And the Eagles next six drives without Lane Johnson, the Eagles combined on their next six drives for negative 10 yards.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah, it was brutal.

[Danny Heifetz]

They literally could only move the ball backward. It was un. They immediately had literally four straight three and outs after LE Johnson left it.

[Danny Kelly]

It felt. It was interesting because it just felt like an AJ Brown was even talking about this after the game and he's like lobbying to kind of just play looser and kind of go more balls. They need.

[Greg Horbeck]

The Eagles need to start every game like they're down 20.

[Danny Kelly]

Right? That's kind of what he was saying after the game is like, I just think we should be more aggressive. Stop this bullshit. Conservative, protect the football. And it felt like when the Eagles had their backs to the wall, which they did after the half, they just started pushing the ball down the field. Jalen Hurts looked like a brand new man. He was throwing all over the field. Hit Dallas Goddard for a touchdown down the middle. AJ Brown started going absolutely bonkers in the second. I mean, Craig, you like, texted at some point in the fourth quarter. It was like A.J. brown is just dominating these skinny ass.

[Greg Horbeck]

Corners like Emanuel Forbes. He like threw him to the. Emanuel Forbes weighs 20 pounds, and I'm not exactly a heavyweight. And so it was like he was playing against children. It was like Gavin playing against those kids in Asia.

[Danny Kelly]

That's like playing against your little brother where you put your hand on his head.

[Greg Horbeck]

Yeah, he looked awesome. And he. Hurts connected on a deep ball with AJ Brown and it was the first deep ball AJ Brown has caught this season. And he. He almost dropped it because it looks like his hands didn't know what to do. Yeah, because it was so unnatural to him. But he bobbled it and ended up coming down with it. But yeah, like, Jalen Hurts was forced to throw in this game, and they completed a lot of great stuff over the middle, like they were working the offense was moving. They actually can't really run the ball, which has been a quiet story.

[Danny Kelly]

Their offensive line is not as dominant as much.

[Greg Horbeck]

No, they're getting a lot more pressure this year. Saquon Barkley has not been able to find a lot of room. And so maybe they will have to, like, make a shift here to the passing game. But it looks good. Hertz was really, really good in the second half.

[Danny Kelly]

It felt like they got their confidence back.

[Danny Heifetz]

You know, Greg Olson, the announcer for this game. And Greg Olson is by a lot the best announcer in the NFL. He's really not close. Yeah, he has all the knowledge of a player, but I don't know kb. I don't know KB No. And he just said, basically addressing how a lot of people are unhappy with Eagles play calling. He was like, it's not about the plays. Just get the ball to your best guys. And he said that he just was exasperated right as AJ Brown got like the two crazy physical third downs where he looks so bad. And Greg Olson's like, look what happens when you throw at A.J. brown. And yeah, I mean, Jalen Hurts second half had 200 passing yards, three touchdowns in the second half. And the honestly, the whole whole game shifted at halftime. One because Jalen Hurts was like body switched or something. I don't know what happened. But also Lane Johnson, so they replaced him with Matt Pryor and then they just benched Matt Pryor and brought in some guy named Fred Johnson at right tackle. And that like, totally changed everything for the Eagles. The flip side is Ramsay, Kevin Dotson, what they already did have Steve Avila the left guard, and then Kevin Donson at the other. Kevin Dotson at the other guard spot got re injured during this game and he left. The Rams couldn't move the ball after. I mean, The Eagles scored 26 unanswered points to end this game. And the Rams couldn't move the ball when Kevin Dotson left. And guess who was on the field goal block unit. Kevin Dotson. Guess who then. So Bo Limer, who is a random NPC but honestly has really struggled for the Rams unblocking. Now he's the guy next to the long snapper and that's the guy that Jordan Davis kind of just worked for. And also I think Jalen Carter also blocked the other field goal, but it's also just. I. So I mean, it's funny that 2.

[Greg Horbeck]

No leverage. No leverage for the Eagles.

[Danny Heifetz]

No leverage. I will say, do you think Howie Roseman is just like cranking hog to the fact that he's These two Georgia defensive tackles, each drafted in the first round. No. What you're telling me he's not. I can't believe I got to draft these fucking Georgia defensive tackles. They were so clearly the best players in college football and I got them back to back and everyone else is an idiot and they're out here blocking field goals for us to win.

[Greg Horbeck]

No. Sure. You know, I gotta say, it does feel like. No. Yeah.

[Danny Kelly]

I'm just like flabbergasted. He's definitely cranky.

[Danny Heifetz]

Everyone's disgusted with me. And then Howie Roseman's listening to the show, like, how the fuck did he know?

[Greg Horbeck]

How did he know that? That he, he likes that he has Jalen Carter and Jordan Davis.

[Danny Kelly]

Whoms amongst us, whomst among us has a crank tog to the Eagles draft picks?

[Greg Horbeck]

You think you're saying Howie Roseman roster baits essentially.

[Danny Heifetz]

How could he not?

[Danny Kelly]

He literally masturbates the roster.

[Danny Heifetz]

Roster the Eagles. Just while I'm being all masochistic here because I can't believe how bad the Giants aren't good. The Eagles are. For the Eagles, it was their first 19 point second half comeback since the Desean Jackson versus the Giants game in the Metal Ants. Jalen hurts 17 and oh in the last 17 games he started and finished. And this was the Rams third largest blown lead in the history of the Rams team.

[Danny Kelly]

I can't believe the Rams lost this game. I know they were absolutely fucking dominating for, you know, obviously the first half. But then they even came out in the second half and scored. They went up 26 to 7, I believe.

[Greg Horbeck]

Yeah, I gotta say, Stafford was not super sharp at the end of this game. I don't know, he was holding his back a little bit, but I thought Stafford started a lot better than he finished. Puka was great. They were able to run the ball a little bit. But I thought Stafford missed a lot.

[Danny Kelly]

Of throws late in that game.

[Greg Horbeck]

Doesn't it feel like the Eagles though this year are like the Chiefs last year where they're like their offense looks okay, but they're just squeezing out these wins now and they're just this team that knows how to win these close games and it's just going to happen.

[Danny Heifetz]

They, they looked, I think they, I, they might just go back to being dominant now because they figured something out in the second half there. And again last year.

[Greg Horbeck]

No, they were just down 20. That's all it was. They were just down 20.

[Danny Heifetz]

I. But I think it's going to look different. Last year's Eagles weren't really the team we remember until October anyway. Like, I just think it takes them a little bit to get going, but I think that it was a reminder that, yeah, you're allowed to have Jalen Hurts throw the goddamn ball in this one.

[Greg Horbeck]

You know, there was a tush push in this game that I had an issue with. Jalen Hurts fumbled a tushbush, and the.

[Danny Heifetz]

Rams did what I want people to do now, which is not when you're not at the goal line. Let him get the first. Come in at the sides and get the fucking ball. And like, I think that happened. We're going to do. Yeah.

[Greg Horbeck]

Still falling forward. They strip the ball. And the Rams got it. And they did not call it. They called it a dead ball.

[Danny Heifetz]

They blew the whistle. But it was an early whistle.

[Greg Horbeck]

It was such an early whistle. He 100% fumble push. They let go for 10 seconds. Just let him get the first down every time.

[Danny Heifetz]

It's hard to like.

[Danny Kelly]

Like he's riding a. Like a mudslide.

[Danny Heifetz]

It's hard to like, judge because the replays don't have audio. And if Jaylen Herz has a whistle in his ear that he. I mean, you're just more likely to let the ball go. But, like, yeah, it was pretty annoying that, like. And also, they literally got a touchdown when the play before with the tush push. They should had a false start, but whatever. The Eagles obviously won this game. The only other thing I want to say before we get out of here with the Eagles, I was really ready for Jalen Hurts to kind of, like, maybe suck in the second half. And, like, I thought it'd be really interesting if he couldn't do this comeback. He did. It was amazing. And I have to say, this motherfucker has ice in his veins. Just like when the railing came down, he didn't move. Did you see the video of him watching the Jordan Davis?

[Greg Horbeck]

I did.

[Danny Kelly]

Can I say he needs to enjoy his life a little bit more?

[Greg Horbeck]

I agree. I'm on DK side. It's lame. I think he. He knows that he's on camera. He knows this is a thing. I think it's just kind of.

[Danny Heifetz]

So for those who don't know, he had, like, zero reaction.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah. So they had a camera trained on him, obviously, because they have, like, a million cameras going at it all times in these games. And the kick is blocked. They were about to lose the game. The kick is blocked. And then they go to win. This is like a miraculous thing. And Jalen Hurts expression doesn't change all the Eagles around him. Are running and screaming and all the coaches are absolutely flipping and Jalen hurts is just standing there motionless and like emote. Like absolutely nothing. I actually think it's a negative, you know, like a lot of people are. I just want him to like enjoy his life a little.

[Greg Horbeck]

I think it's cringy, to be honest.

[Danny Heifetz]

No, it's.

[Greg Horbeck]

It's cringy.

[Danny Heifetz]

It's weird. He's him. He's him. He has sold his soul for whatever. I don't know what the hell he's got going on.

[Danny Kelly]

But I mean, you're right though, he does have ice in his veins. But like just have a little fun. I know you only live once.

[Danny Heifetz]

Fun. Zero fun, sir. No, he ain't gonna have any fun. As the Brady Patriots said in their death rows, winning is fun.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah, but Brady's. I mean even Brady's ice cold days, he's like jumping around on the sidelines, high fiving and you know, people and all that.

[Danny Heifetz]

No, it's, it's. I like it. It's.

[Danny Kelly]

It's, you know, same. Yeah.

[Danny Heifetz]

One of the coolest things.

[Danny Kelly]

That's what I mean. People's mothers. Right? Okay. I mean he might have been. I don't know.

[Danny Heifetz]

There's other. Well, I'm not going to go to that next category, Craig.

[Greg Horbeck]

Well, I want to. I want to. It's a special category that I'm inventing for Caleb Williams win over the Cowboys today. This is the category is called Is this stripper into me or is this just her job Award for the performance. I can't tell was real or not. Oh my God. And I don't know. Today Caleb was awesome today. He had like 240 yards, three touchdowns at halftime. He finished with 300 yards, four touchdowns. He's the QB one on the day. Like he was awesome but it was kind of just wide open receivers. The whole like. Like he hit them all. Like the Luther Burden throw was a rope. He like launched at 60 yards. Right. He played great.

[Danny Kelly]

The touchdown pass to D.J. morley in the game was pretty sick too.

[Greg Horbeck]

Really nice, I agree. But it was a lot of like the Ben Johnson, this is what you want, right? Like it was a lot of like guys schemed open and also he was playing the Cowboys who we just watched Russell Wilson tonight against the Chiefs. That Same player had 450 yards against the Cowboys.

[Danny Kelly]

I don't think we know. I don't think we are grasping entirely how horrific the Cowboys defense is.

[Danny Heifetz]

It's the worst in the NFL. Yeah, Craig, that's fun. I was Actually going to read you Russell Wilson stat line from last week and pretend it was Caleb's.

[Greg Horbeck]

I mean, they were awesome today. Like, the Bears had a 19 play touchdown drive. It was the longest of the NFL this year. It lasted 10 minutes.

[Danny Kelly]

10 minutes.

[Danny Heifetz]

Because Dallas no drawn Bland. Tron Diggs got hurt during the game. Kenny Clark got hurt during the game. There's no one on this team. They have no defensive ends, no quarterbacks.

[Greg Horbeck]

So I don't know if this stripper is. Is into me maybe more than any of the other guys.

[Danny Heifetz]

No, she.

[Greg Horbeck]

No, she just. She's just great at her job.

[Danny Heifetz]

It is her job. But she likes you.

[Greg Horbeck]

Yeah.

[Danny Heifetz]

Like she's into you.

[Danny Kelly]

It's a real spark there, Craig.

[Greg Horbeck]

It's farter sharp, but it's positive.

[Danny Heifetz]

No, that's good though. Every single team, every week when they play the Cowboys defense is a stripper. And every single time your team plays them, you're like, my team's great. Doesn't matter. This happened to all the other teams.

[Danny Kelly]

By the way, this is the first game of Caleb's career in which he was not sacked.

[Danny Heifetz]

Wow, that's so.

[Greg Horbeck]

That's a great stat.

[Danny Heifetz]

It's also going to be the last. Also, how do you feel if you're Matt Eberfluss and you got fired last year for the Bears and then.

[Danny Kelly]

My God. Yeah.

[Danny Heifetz]

Like, you know, every. And then you try to stop him and Actually, actually I saw a lot of Bears fans saying this was the best Bears game Matt Avery flu's ever coached.

[Greg Horbeck]

I feel like I've come into the show negative with the Eagles and I was pissed off that Jalen Hurts fumbled the tush push, but they didn't call it. And the false start with the tosh push, that bothered me. And then now I'm posing this negative Caleb Williams category. Even though he played really well.

[Danny Heifetz]

Played great though he played great. And Roma Dun looks awesome. Roma Dunz looks like fixed. I mean, the Bears look Ben Johnsony like Caleb also, Caleb is looking more and more like a number one pick in terms of. The throws are amazing. The flea flicker, which Deandre Swift worst I've ever seen on a flea flicker.

[Danny Kelly]

The flea flicker passed back to. That is the worst flicker pass I've ever seen.

[Danny Heifetz]

It looked like you were doing softball talks to your friends. If you're next to them, you're not even pushing.

[Danny Kelly]

You're like 8ft in the air.

[Danny Heifetz]

And then Caleb. It took so long that Caleb had to rip it. And I think that was the longest completion. It was that all year.

[Greg Horbeck]

Yeah, I mean, he absolutely ripped.

[Danny Kelly]

By the way, it was a really nice catch too, by Luther Burden. I mean, that was not an easy catch to make.

[Greg Horbeck]

No, it was not in his body. It was like out with his hands by the sideline.

[Danny Heifetz]

Swift looked like he was trying to get Caleb killed with the flea flicker. Just hung there forever.

[Greg Horbeck]

But do you think.

[Danny Heifetz]

You think it's.

[Greg Horbeck]

Is it more likely that three weeks from now we look back on that Dallas game and go, man, Dallas sucks, Or do we look back and say that was the first sign that Caleb was turning into a different version of himself?

[Danny Heifetz]

Did the Bears play the Cowboys again in three weeks?

[Greg Horbeck]

They do play Vegas next week and then they have a buy.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah, they got Vegas by Commander Saints. They have Vegas by Commander Saints. So there's some get right ability here.

[Danny Heifetz]

I am not trying to wash away what Caleb did here. And like, I was very impressed and frankly, like I was gonna say, crazy disappointed in Dallas. I don't see. We didn't mention CD Lamb got hurt in this game. Barely played, didn't have a catch. There were a lot of people at CD Lamb and neighbors on their team that got like no points from either of them.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah, and that's the team that you just feel good about going into a Sunday and then nothing.

[Danny Heifetz]

So I understand the Cowboys couldn't keep up. I don't want to, like, hand wave. What Caleb did, it was incredible. And again, he looks like a number one pick. It's gonna work. But to answer your question, I think the Cowboys defense is the worst defense I've seen in like a while.

[Danny Kelly]

You can say. I think you can say both. I think Craig the stripper did like.

[Greg Horbeck]

You, but it's also her job.

[Danny Kelly]

She's going to keep living her life because she has to, you know, provide for her family. So therefore, you know, she's not going to just.

[Greg Horbeck]

She'll start texting you when she's going on that night and then you can.

[Danny Kelly]

Say, I think we've. We haven't talked about him a lot lately. Lately, because they've been losing pretty badly. But Caleb Williams has been doing the things you hope to see from him this year in terms of not taking as many sacks, playing more on time, very limited turnovers.

[Greg Horbeck]

He has one interception this year.

[Danny Kelly]

So, like, there is tangible development happening. Obviously, I think it's not going. It's not going to be linear and he's not going to just continue to get better and better. Probably there's going to be down games too, but I mean, if you're a Bears fan. You got to feel pretty good about this, honestly.

[Danny Heifetz]

Caleb's second Chicago quarterback this century of a game with four passing touchdowns, no turnovers, no sacks.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah, you got to feel good about Ben Johnson because the offense does have some pretty cool wrinkles in it. They're doing some cool things and Caleb is running the offense for, you know, for the most part. Obviously not perfect and it's going to be a process. But yeah, I think they look pretty good.

[Danny Heifetz]

You have to. I mean, honestly, this is probably the best quarterback Bears game. I mean, I guess Justin Field's actually a good one a couple years ago, but neither here nor there.

[Danny Kelly]

None of that ever felt real though, right?

[Danny Heifetz]

No, it was like this one feels more repeatable. This one was pretty safe. This is what you envisioned.

[Greg Horbeck]

It's because of Ben Johnson. That's why it feels repeatable.

[Danny Heifetz]

All right, we're going to get to the rest of the awards here, but first, the Ringer Fantasy Football show is brought to my FanDuel. FanDuel is changing the way you live bet football and it starts with Next Drive sgps. Now you can bet what's happening on the next drive. Will it end in a touchdown, a punt, a field goal? Then see the player stat you need, stack in player props and build your bed exactly how you want it. And every NFL game day comes with a profit boost you can use on your next drive SGP so you can get more out of every play whether you're betting a drive a player or the next big moment. FanDuel makes live betting feel smarter, faster, and way more fun. Visit fanduel.com ringer fantasy to download the app today and bet the next drive your way must be 21 + and present in select states or 18 + and present in DC, Kentucky or Wyoming. Opt in required bonus issued as non withdrawable profit boost tokens, restriction supply including any token expiration and max wager amount. See terms@sportsbook fanduel.com gambling problem. Call 1-800-gambler or visit rj-help.com call 1-888-789-7777 or visit ccpg.org chat in Connecticut before.

[Greg Horbeck]

We move on, I feel like I got to address my video setup. I know I look like I'm in a hostage video. I'm not. I'm okay. You don't have to worry. I am all right. But I. I'm in. I'm in a back house in rural.

[Danny Heifetz]

Virginia at a bachelor party.

[Greg Horbeck]

I'm not at a bachelor party.

[Danny Heifetz]

Hence why, you know, the thinking about the stripper idea.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah.

[Greg Horbeck]

No, that's incorrect. But yeah, that, that I'm, I'm sitting hunched over on a couch right now. So my back, my back is tight.

[Danny Kelly]

Okay.

[Greg Horbeck]

And I'm laying it on the line.

[Danny Heifetz]

You're like Stafford.

[Greg Horbeck]

And for the listeners, yeah, he was holding his back. Anyway, so the first loser. We're going to get into. Losers. First loser. My back. Dk, you're up.

[Danny Kelly]

I'm going to go with everyone. This is a loser. By the way, everyone who watched the Jags Texans game, everyone who watched that game is now dumber. In an era, in a year, in a season in which the Colts are changing our concept of what is possible in offensive football, Daniel Jones is ascended to a new level of quarterbacking. Everything he does is absolutely perfect. So far this season, they're barely ever punting. I think they punted the first time this week in an, in a season when that's happening. The Jags and Texans. Good God, what is going on with these two offenses? So the Jags beat the Texans 17 to 10. I feel like Trevor Lawrence and Stroud are kind of in a similar category or the same category now, as is that category bad?

[Greg Horbeck]

They're bad.

[Danny Kelly]

It's, yeah, bad. But you think they should be good. And some people still think they're good. And they're going to have a lot of excuses thrown out for them for the next few years, probably. Trevor's definitely a couple of years ahead of Stroud, but I think Stroud is entering that zone now where you're like, why is this guy so fucking bad? He should be so much better.

[Danny Heifetz]

You're describing me. I thought Stroud and Lawrence were good, but. And I've been making excuses for them up until today, and I'm done.

[Danny Kelly]

I, I, and I'm, I still think Stroud's good. I'm, like, holding onto this is probably just by like, like preconceived notions or whatever, but the Texans offense is extremely bad. And like Bobby Slocus probably somewhere smiling like, fuck you guys, like, it wasn't my fault. Right now, through three games, the Texans are dead last in the NFL in points per game, 12.7 points per game. They have scored three total touchdowns this season, which is tied for last. They're dead last in points per drive, obviously dead last in third down. Conversion rate just 24%. That was a huge problem for them last year. Remember, like, they would always get into these third longs, never be able to convert, never keep drives going. They are absolutely wasting a very good defense. Or at least a pretty good defense, I think.

[Danny Heifetz]

Not wasting it anymore. Derek's ding really hurt his oblique, so the defense isn't going to be good anymore either.

[Danny Kelly]

This is an interesting stat from Dante Kopowitz Fleming. He always has dankest stats every Sunday, by the way. Check him out. The Texans are the only team in the last 20 seasons to start oh and three despite giving up fewer than 55 points.

[Danny Heifetz]

That's fucking sick.

[Danny Kelly]

Brutal. This offense sucks.

[Danny Heifetz]

I did. I got to watch. I got to tell you, watching Jaguars Texans Today, I think C.J. stroud and Trevor Lawrence both looked like backup quarterbacks.

[Danny Kelly]

I don't understand it because. Yeah, it's like you see Mac Jones come in and play for the 49ers and he's like not like lighting it up, but he's, you know, he's pushing the ball down the field and all this.

[Danny Heifetz]

Carson Wentz, vastly these two and I. It's infrastructure. It's more complicated than that. Look, the Texans offensive line is, I think, clearly the worst in the NFL. It's almost as if getting rid of Laramie Tunsil for a rookie second rounder and that like didn't work. And getting the guards from the two teams whose biggest problem last year was guards and almost like that didn't work. And now the whole getting Iowa State receiver thing looks kind of fucked up. I know it's three weeks in the season, but like the season's kind of over. Like they're owing three, the Colts are three and oh, they are three games behind the Colts three weeks in. That's as bad as you can possibly do. And also like it actually was worse than the numbers indicate. One, they had two rushing first downs, which is preposterous, but also they. The only touchdown the Texans scored today was Nico Collins at a 50 yard touchdown. That was bullshit. That was the cornerback on Jacksonville just did the wrong thing. Like he clearly didn't realize he was the deep safety. Nico Collins is open by 30 yards. It was a broken coverage, it was a busted play. It had nothing to do with skill. Take that out. C.G. stratton. 150 yards and two interceptions. And like I can't stress enough how little the offense did then Nico Collins also blew the game anyway because they should have. Texans should have won. Nico Collins trying to do an A.J. brown fumbled in field goal position where the Texans should have been able to pull it out. Like every single aspect of what the Texas do on offense is horrific.

[Danny Kelly]

It's hard to watch, man. It's. It's like really frustrating.

[Greg Horbeck]

Stroud hasn't been good for a year and a half. I've been, I've been, I've been saying it.

[Danny Heifetz]

The real thing you could get the real take percolating is that Stroud's rookie season was vastly overrated because frankly, a lot of turnovers he would have had were just dropped or whatever. And that Strat like. But I will say the real, the real thing is that if you just look before and after he big brothered Caleb Williams and stab, you know, the dude that. Yeah, it's pretty. It's before and after. I. Lawrence though, was bad too.

[Greg Horbeck]

I want to real quick, real quick.

[Danny Kelly]

Before we move on from. And this is a segue to Lawrence, but Austin Gail pointed this out today since the beginning of last season. So Craig like, Craig, like you said, since the beginning of 2024, the three quarterbacks in EPA per drop back. The three bottom quarterbacks in EPA for drop back are Joe Flacco, Trevor Lawrence and CJ Stroud.

[Danny Heifetz]

That's. I'm. Thank you for remembering that. I actually want you to say that again because if anyone's like driving and like, or doing the dishes and half listening, I like need them to hear that again.

[Danny Kelly]

Expected points per drop back, which is, it takes into account all of the, you know, like where the, where the ball is going, all the attempted passes, no stats, perfect.

[Danny Heifetz]

But that's the best one we have.

[Danny Kelly]

It's a very good quarterback for. In terms of just how good are.

[Danny Heifetz]

You, how performed, how an offense is performing. It's the best stat we have.

[Danny Kelly]

And so, and it's a, it's a team stat. So it's not just these quarterbacks, but the bottom three guys are Joe Flacco, Tr. Trevor Lawrence and C.J. stroud.

[Danny Heifetz]

Since the beginning of last year. That's a full year. So I, I just, that's brutal. And you watch Lawrence today and I'm like, you know, I, I've been a Lawrence apologist, but I'm like, he missed so many throws. Like I, There were just so many downfield throws where I'm like, oh, my God, that's off. That's off. And I know the accuracy's been spotty, but seeing it in a game where I'm like, this is such a must win game.

[Greg Horbeck]

And then you see like, well, they won, but.

[Danny Heifetz]

Yeah, yeah, but they won, but like.

[Greg Horbeck]

No, he was terrible.

[Danny Heifetz]

When the teams come out of a timeout and like, this is like, go win the game. And tra. The first play of the drive, the first play of the drive is Travis Hunter and Brian. Brian Robinson are just both thinking they're running a rub route, a pick route, and then Trevor Lawrence throws the ball to someone who isn't there. And I was one of those where I'm like, I don't know if Brian Robinson wasn't on the same page as Lawrence or if Travis Hunter wasn't, but either way, yeah, sorry. Yeah, sorry. Brian Thomas. And it's one of those where either Brian Thomas should be on the same page as Lawrence or if it's Travis Hunter read the wrong route. You're like, damn, maybe he shouldn't be in defensive meetings. How is neither of them in the right place? The first, the biggest drive of the game.

[Greg Horbeck]

I think it's pretty simple. I don't think Lawrence is accurate. He's just errant. All of his throws are not on target. They're just not. Like, he's big, he's athletic, he can move. He's not accurate. And he's just misses a lot of throws. He air balls a lot of throws. There's a lot of high throws. That's why everyone makes the hospital ball jokes with him. He's just not that accurate.

[Danny Kelly]

In addition to that. And I agree with that. Like, he's not been accurate, but in addition to that. And this is a problem that's gone on for the Jags for a long time. It's. It's like, almost like, in their DNA. I talk about this all the time. Just feels like, this is who you are. I don't care that Liam Cohen. And look, they're two in one. So, like, we're quibbling, obviously, but they're so sloppy. They had five drops today, too.

[Danny Heifetz]

Oh, my God.

[Danny Kelly]

In addition to all the inaccuracies and routes being clumped together too much and guys being in the wrong position, they dropped five passes. Like, their superstar receiver, Brian Thomas Jr. Had another, like, massive drop today. So it's just really frustrating, man.

[Greg Horbeck]

But at least their second overall pick played a lot today. Oh, wait, he played. 68% of the team dropped.

[Danny Heifetz]

I want to introduce. I want to introduce the new game.

[Greg Horbeck]

68% of the team. Drop backs. Travis Hunter was out there running routes.

[Danny Heifetz]

Hold on, hold on.

[Greg Horbeck]

Two thirds. Two thirds of it.

[Danny Heifetz]

So we didn't cover this a ton. We don't do a ton. But there are fantasies that do individual defensive points. And Travis Hunter was a. Was a really controversial player because the idea that you could play receiver. Offensive players score more points in fantasy than defensive guys. So it was like, a huge controversy. That Travis Hunter would have dual eligibility. It was like cheating that you could put a wide receiver at a quarterback spot. So someone emailed us in and said two cornerbacks who outscored Travis Hunter in fantasy today. Like, literally, Travis under plays both ways. And yet Jamel Dean, Kenny Moore, Chow, Smith, Wade.

[Danny Kelly]

Wow.

[Greg Horbeck]

Jamel Dean had a touchdown, right?

[Danny Heifetz]

Yeah.

[Danny Kelly]

Are you talking about today?

[Danny Heifetz]

Yes. I'm lying.

[Danny Kelly]

They all actually had a pick six today, too.

[Danny Heifetz]

All of them outscored. But the point is, there were, I believe, five different cornerbacks who would have had more fantasy points than Travis Hunter today, which isn't great.

[Greg Horbeck]

No, it's not great. Also, when. When Travis Hunter has the ball, like, he had one catch today for 21 yards. It was awesome. He, like, shook three guys. Incredibly twitchy and athletic. Kadarius. Tony esque, I might say.

[Danny Kelly]

Oh, no, but don't you dare.

[Greg Horbeck]

I'm like, complimentary. Like, that's how jittery he looked out there. But he's. He's not playing.

[Danny Heifetz]

No, the.

[Danny Kelly]

But they won.

[Danny Heifetz]

They won.

[Greg Horbeck]

Fake ass win.

[Danny Heifetz]

The Texans are an abomination.

[Danny Kelly]

Did you see. Come on. I will say this. Like, I. I want to point this out because I. There. I think Schefter was sharing them for some reason. He was sharing a bunch of like. Like post game Chef. Like, I was like, I don't know.

[Greg Horbeck]

But I watch them and I have some thoughts about.

[Danny Kelly]

I fall for that stuff. I actually get kind of into it. Like, there was a great one where Ben Johnson did the post game speech. The team, and it was like getting fired up. I kind of get into that stuff. And. And Liam Cohen was going off after the. After the win. I was like, okay, I kind of like this. I'm kind of in. I'm. I'm back in. But even though they're like. They look like they're two in one.

[Greg Horbeck]

So Lawrence was 20 for 40 today. 220 yards, no touchdowns in a pick.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah.

[Danny Heifetz]

And it was. It was. It was bad. But however, the Colts played great. And I actually think we have to give the. The Oppenheimer player who went nuclear. I think we have to just give it honestly to the Colts. Daniel Jones, Jonathan Taylor, they're three. And oh, they beat the Titans today, 41 to 20.

[Danny Kelly]

Another great stat from Dante Kapla with Fleming. This is. This is hilarious. This blows my mind. It gives you the context. And I'm. And I don't believe it 1% even, but it is hilarious. There's two teams in the Super bowl era to start. Three and oh, while punting less than five times. The 2025 Colts and the 2007 Patriots. Like, this is the level of offensive just destruction that we're seeing from the Colts.

[Danny Heifetz]

Like perfection.

[Danny Kelly]

It's the 2007 Patriots, which they changed offense as we know it that year.

[Danny Heifetz]

Doing the same thing. Who should be more embarrassed by that fact?

[Danny Kelly]

Who should be more just the Saints from last year.

[Danny Heifetz]

Well, dk, who should be more embarrassed by that fact? Anthony Richardson for being unable to quarterback this team or the Giants for cutting Daniel Jones?

[Danny Kelly]

Again, the. Daniel Jones is never going to do this with the Giants. This is a great.

[Greg Horbeck]

That's correct. But perhaps it was always in him.

[Danny Kelly]

I. You know what I think is funny? Maybe that maybe it never was, but it felt like this was a close competition between. Between Daniel Jones and Anthony Richardson.

[Danny Heifetz]

Richardson's good.

[Danny Kelly]

Like Richardson. Like I thought for a long time people thought Anthony Richardson was going to be the starter. And then it was like a shock that Daniel Jones and now he's like playing as the best quarterback in the league, right?

[Greg Horbeck]

Basically the best quarterback in the league.

[Danny Heifetz]

He's Josh Allen. Daniel Jones, Lamar Jackson, he's the QB3.

[Greg Horbeck]

In fantasy, the Colts are three and oh, the Titans are zero three. The Texans are zero and three. The Jags are two and one. Dude, the Colts have 103 points in three. They're averaging 34 points a game. No Indianapolis era Colts team has ever done that. 103 points in three games. Damn, they never did that.

[Danny Heifetz]

I like that we bought our. We all brought our own cold stats. My Indiana Jones stat is that Indiana Jones is the first player with three touchdown passes, three touchdown runs and no turnovers in the first three weeks in the super bowl era.

[Danny Kelly]

Did you see that they were calling him Indianapolis Jones on the, on the broadcast. I'm like, what are you doing? I think they. Indiana Jones.

[Greg Horbeck]

That's the worst. That doesn't make sense.

[Danny Kelly]

Here's the deal that I think is so impressive about Daniel Jones. And he had a couple plays in this game where he escaped pressure. There was one in particular. He like ran around, spun backwards and then rushed for a third down. I think it was like a third and long. And it. It was incredible play. Daniel Jones, who to me, in Heifetz, there was times in the past where Heifetz was talking about how he was legitimately worried about Daniel Jones crossing the street because he just had no pocket awareness. He did not sense pressure whatsoever. He had it. He just couldn't deal with pressure. And it kept taking a million sacks and getting hurt on these sacks. Through three games, Daniel Jones has taken two sacks, and he's the NFL.

[Greg Horbeck]

Yep. Leads the NFL.

[Danny Heifetz]

So a lot of what the Colts are doing. I don't want to pretend to know everything Shane Steichen's doing an offense, but I do think, I swear to God, sometimes teams, I, I, I wonder if the teams playing the Colts have actually watched the 2022 tape of the Giants, because I feel like Shane Steichen has taken a lot of elements of that offense. Except the difference is the Giants were trying to throw a lot of stuff, basically moving the pocket. And, like, just that whole offense was spamming bootlegs to tight ends to, like, throwing the flat to, like, Daniel Bellinger. And the difference is the Colts have a better offensive line than the Giants did. Jonathan Taylor's similar to Saquon, but Tyler Warren is, like, the best player in the Colts. And I feel like the teams haven't watched any of the Daniel Jones stuff that Shane Steichen's cribbing from. And eventually, I wonder if this is going to, like, calm down or whatever, because teams are going to realize that, like, how much of a downfield passing game is there necessarily, if there's not just bootlegs all the time? I will say this, though. Jones, to your point, is that getting sacked, he's still a little reckless. And having watched this guy's entire career, Joan, like he did twice in this game, if I'm not mistaken, Daniel Jones got past the sticks on a scramble and then lowered his shoulder for, like, another yard, which is like, you don't do that as a quarterback. If you got the first down already, just go down. Why are you fighting for one yard? Like, that's dumb. He will get hurt at some point over the season. I had an intrusive thought. No, I'm just. If you keep doing that right, don't be like, oh, come on. Like, he's got hurt every year of his career. He's been hurt every year of his career. I'm just saying he needs. There are three.

[Greg Horbeck]

Put that out there.

[Danny Heifetz]

I'm saying don't. I'm not putting it out there.

[Greg Horbeck]

You are. You are literally putting it out there.

[Danny Heifetz]

That's not a jinx. A jinx is saying he'll definitely not get hurt. That's a jinx.

[Greg Horbeck]

You said he will get hurt. Don't put that out.

[Danny Heifetz]

I said he'll get hurt if he keeps lowering his shoulder.

[Greg Horbeck]

The definition of putting it out there is you saying he will.

[Danny Heifetz]

Fine, I'm putting it out There. Daniel Jones, stop lowering your shoulder. Already got the first down. Like, don't get hurt.

[Greg Horbeck]

Like, I saw you be you, Daniel. That's why you guys are winning. I think you're right, though, Hyp. He is the. Daniel Jones has the fourth fastest time to throw right now in the league. Like, the ball's getting out of his hand quick, and he's actually getting pressured a lot, which is interesting. The sack rate is the lowest in the league, but the pressure rate's kind of high. Like Justin Herbert today played the Broncos, got sacked five times. Daniel Jones played the Broncos last week, got sacked once, but the pressure rate was equal. It was basically 50% of drop backs for Herbert and Daniel Jones. They were pressured. And yet Daniel Jones, it resulted in one sack. Herbert, it resulted in five. And it's because of the time to throw. Herbert holds onto the ball. He's trying to make things happen. Daniel Jones is really good at getting it out of his hand, and that's why Tyler Warren is like, the perfect fit.

[Danny Heifetz]

Yeah.

[Greg Horbeck]

And even though he had a kind of a. It was a quiet, slow day today for.

[Danny Heifetz]

It's because the Colts beat the shit out of the Titans. And I just.

[Greg Horbeck]

Yeah, Jonathan Taylor was nuts. Yeah.

[Danny Kelly]

I was going to say, before we move on from the Colts, Jonathan Taylor, I don't think any running back is playing better than him.

[Greg Horbeck]

No, he's not.

[Danny Heifetz]

I mean, he's.

[Danny Kelly]

I don't know if I'm, like, ready to call him the best running back.

[Danny Heifetz]

In the NFL, but I think it's a discussion unambiguously.

[Greg Horbeck]

Yeah.

[Danny Kelly]

I mean, he's. In terms of stats, he's. He's the best running back in the.

[Greg Horbeck]

NFL, but I don't even think this is like, he's having a great season. I think this is who Jonathan Taylor is. And we saw it his. His second year in the league when he led a league in rushing, and then he's been kind of dinged up, just healthy. Now he was suspended for that. Like, there has been some. Some stuff. The Colts were bad.

[Danny Heifetz]

Jim Ursay was trying to give his money to a whale.

[Greg Horbeck]

Yeah.

[Danny Heifetz]

And then said, look, son, we all kind of aged. I do them.

[Greg Horbeck]

Yeah. Like, I think Jonathan Taylor has always been this good. There's just been many reasons why it, like, hasn't been working out. But when. When things are clicking, the offensive line is good, the offense is good, and he's healthy and playing. This is how good he is. He is a top two or three running back in the league.

[Danny Heifetz]

I have to, you know, in retrospect Jim, or, say, refusing to give John Taylor $25 million while simultaneously trying to airlift a whale to the Pacific Northwest for $25 million. Then the whale died and he signed Jonathan Taylor. It's my favorite thing that's happened in the entire time we've done the show.

[Danny Kelly]

You couldn't have made that up. Think about how many. Like, the most creative writer. I. I can't even imagine anyone.

[Greg Horbeck]

If I ever have that much money, I hope to be doing some like that.

[Danny Heifetz]

That will die. To John Taylor. Signal, three days.

[Danny Kelly]

That's Operation Dumbo Drop.

[Danny Heifetz]

It's unbelievable.

[Danny Kelly]

Gotta be moving some massive animals. That's all.

[Danny Heifetz]

Oh, my God.

[Danny Kelly]

Anyway, Taylor, by the way, is first in rushing yards. First in rushing yards after contact, first in scrimmage yards, first in touchdowns, first in points per touch. He's very good.

[Greg Horbeck]

And he had one of the plays of the day. His long touchdown run was unbelievable.

[Danny Heifetz]

It's amazing. Yeah. No, it's. Jonathan Taylor right now is. I don't know if he's a league winner, but if you're 3 0, you probably have Jonathan Taylor in your fantasy team. Big reason. By the way, they.

[Danny Kelly]

Who'd they beat? Well, I feel like we didn't even mention it.

[Danny Heifetz]

The Titans.

[Greg Horbeck]

Titans.

[Danny Kelly]

The Titans, who have the worst vibes.

[Danny Heifetz]

You want me to. I was gonna. I was gonna wait. We'll just do it.

[Greg Horbeck]

They need to get Callahan the hell out of there.

[Danny Heifetz]

The worst coaching of the entire day. I was going to do this. We could just do this coaching category now.

[Danny Kelly]

Sure.

[Danny Heifetz]

Yeah. I think Brian Callahan and Mike mcdaniel are just like having a secretariat neck and neck race for who's going to be the first coach fired.

[Greg Horbeck]

I'm back in on McDaniel.

[Danny Heifetz]

Well, the bad game, but, yeah, they played better on Thursday, the third Titans game. First of all, I have to read this quote from Michael Pittman and then I have to yell at Brian Callan. But Michael Pittman, who's the Colts receiver you talked about, what's the opposite of the inspirational coach? Speeches after game. I love when players bury a team via quote. Like, we knew we were all going to win all week. Like, Michael Pittman said this about playing the Titans today. He said, we saw it on the pregame intros. The Titans kind of looked a little sluggish. They were kind of walking around. Nobody was really bouncing right then and there. We all sat there and we were like, they don't want to play today. I actually think that's about as damning of a thing as you can say about Another coach, you can, can have an X and O tail. You can have whatever. If you're a coach and your team's getting the shit kicked out of them and the other team's like, yeah, they looked like they didn't want to play. It's kind of the most insulting thing you could say to another team.

[Greg Horbeck]

Also, Callahan, like, can't manage the clock to save his life. It's. It's, it's bad, the vibe.

[Danny Heifetz]

So that's. I, I have, I'm so. I, I have to go into this. I'm sorry. I. One of the worst things I've seen Callahan delay. I think it's the worst coaching thing of the year. They. There was a minute left in the half and the Titans were at midfield. They're like, fine, we'll settle for 57 yard field goal. Which put that to the side of whether you're going to bleed out 90 seconds and just not try to get closer to 50. Like, whatever. You set up for 57. Fine. The Colts take a timeout because they're like, yeah, we'll get the ball. 45 seconds left. Sure. Brian Callan still doesn't know if he wants to settle for the field goal. So then they take a timeout. So like the Colts took a timeout and the Titans still couldn't decide. Then they Titans took a timeout. Their final timeout or sorry, no, they still won that. Then they're like, we'll put the field goal unit out there somehow after they had the worst special teams in like history of timeouts. They didn't, I believe Brian Callan said they didn't have the right ball out there for the field goal. The kick cable, the kicking ball. Can't stress enough how much. That's like four people's entire job on the sideline is to get the correct ball.

[Danny Kelly]

There's a guy that's like, his whole job is to hold the cable.

[Greg Horbeck]

Also. Also, like just kick without it. Isn't that what people were doing, like for the last 50 years?

[Danny Heifetz]

Well, it's a 57 yarder. You can't. But they, but you're saying you can't take another timeout because that's a penalty. So then, because he already took one. So they take a delay of game, 62 yarder, decided to kick anyway. Miss the kick, Colts get the ball, go down, the Colts get a field goal. And it's one of those things where you're like, litter. I just can't believe the Colts took a timeout and then they still couldn't fucking decide. And he took his own. And then they needed the timeout. And it's just. It's. They invent new ways.

[Danny Kelly]

Well, it's. It's snowballing. We didn't really discuss this earlier, but it's snowballing on Callahan because I think he's under a lot of heat. He didn't know what the catch rule was or there was a whole a flub. The. A couple weeks ago or a week ago where he was like, I think.

[Danny Heifetz]

Oh, they were going to challenge.

[Danny Kelly]

It doesn't equal two feet or something. I can't remember what exactly it was. It was an I, man.

[Danny Heifetz]

It was that. Yeah. Shin is. Is two feet.

[Danny Kelly]

One elbow doesn't equal. He had it backward anyway. So he's been under fire for, like, things that he should know.

[Greg Horbeck]

I guess it was an elbow in week one.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah. So I will say I want to. I want to throw one thing out here. Just not in defense necessarily, but, like, give some context. The Titans have had just like the most fucking hellacious schedule to start the season. Denver Broncos, Week one on the Los Angeles Rams. Week two. Indianapolis Colts, Week three. Next week they get the Texans defense. I think this. I think we'll look back at the end of the year and the Broncos, Rams and Colts will have three of the best defenses in the league. And so at the very least, at the very least, hopefully things will start to get a little bit easier for this.

[Greg Horbeck]

I agree.

[Danny Kelly]

You know that, like, it's not good right now. Everything looks horrible. And Cam Ward has, you know, the stats don't look great. I think he's flashed a little bit, but the stats don't look good. Calvin really hasn't done jack shit. I am a. Nora looks awesome. He actually. We'll talk about him later, But. But, you know, I think just keep that in mind. Like, they've had an absolute gauntlet to start this season. The best defenses in the league, but still it's. It's not looking good.

[Danny Heifetz]

Other people want to shout out for just people that have massive day. Isaiah Rogers, the cornerback on the Colts. Sorry, too much Colts. Isaiah. He was in the Colts. Isaiah Rogers now in the Vikings. I think Isaiah Rogers genuinely probably had the best first half any defender any defender has ever had in the history of the NFL.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah.

[Danny Heifetz]

And I don't.

[Danny Kelly]

I've never seen anything like that.

[Danny Heifetz]

Rogers had. I mean, he's the first player to have two touchdowns and two force fumbles in the first half since they began tracking the stats. Stats. And he did that in the first Half like he's the first player in NFL history to have a pick six, a fumble return for a touchdown and two force fumbles in a game. And he did it in the first half like Isaiah Rogers kind of single handedly ended this game. He literally put the Vikings up. He gave 14 points himself. Then another force fumble that the Vikings immediately turned into a third touchdown.

[Danny Kelly]

I think the Vikings defense scored like 29 today or something like that.

[Danny Heifetz]

Isaiah Rogers outscored the Bengals 10 points and one was a garbage time. Isaiah Rogers had 14 wild. And then the Vikings, it's the number one fantasy defense on the whole day, obviously. I mean they had like 30 points. I have a friend who picked him up, left him on his bench, left his defense slot.

[Danny Kelly]

Oh God, that's the worst.

[Danny Heifetz]

But yeah, the Viking, that was just a slaughter. Literally 48 to 10. And it was really 48 to 3. So that was just ridiculous. But yeah, shout out Isaiah Rogers. So it's nice that now he has something other than just being the guy who's suspended for gambling. So there you go.

[Danny Kelly]

There we go.

[Danny Heifetz]

It's a nice come up.

[Danny Kelly]

Good job, good game.

[Danny Heifetz]

Maybe bet on two touchdowns. Other. Okay, it's so over. We're so back, Craig.

[Greg Horbeck]

We're so back. The Browns D might be sick again. Two years ago, Browns D was unstoppable, dude. Quietly. So as we said earlier, the Browns, they won. They won the football game today against the Green Bay Packers. They had more point, the game ended and they had more points than the Packers. They held Joe Burrow to 17 points in week one. And then they, they lost badly to the Ravens in week two. But they only let up 10 points in the first half. They basically have just had one bad half in the first three weeks of the season. They are first in first downs allowed per game. They have the highest sack, sack rate, sack rate in the league, second lowest yards per play. The defense looks like a wagon. And also like I unfortunately it appears that Quinton Judkins is, is pretty good at running back.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah.

[Greg Horbeck]

And if, if this team had like a quarterback that was decent, I think the Browns could be pretty solid because the defense is awesome.

[Danny Heifetz]

Dk, I'm curious, you think. I think sometimes you watch a team not be able to move the ball like the Texans. You're like, this team, this offense sucks. And the Browns offense isn't great. But I looked at the Packers, Browns, I actually thought this was one of the better played games of the day. I thought the defenses were unbelievable.

[Danny Kelly]

It's really fun to watch. I Mean obviously Miles Garrett is just a fricking game wrecker out there. He's awesome. They have a good secondary. The guys are flying around. I don't know, it's just. Yeah, they just are playing really disciplined and absolutely destroying people up front. So I want to shout out Mason Graham. I think I saw this. I can't remember where, where it was but their rookie defensive tackle had like a 40 something percent win rate who they traded.

[Danny Heifetz]

The Jags traded back out of the Travis Hunter pick and the Browns picked.

[Danny Kelly]

Up the picks and he was super disruptive. Dropping him into that defensive line is some somewhat similar and much, much, much lower. It's not lauded nearly as much as what the Giants did with Abdul Carter, but I mean he's, he's raising the level I think of that defensive unit. And so man they're just absolutely dominant and if they do a good job of not turning the ball over and if Flacco can kind of just play more ball control, obviously this is a really good defense. They played for the packers so didn't expect Flacco to play well. But you know they have some interesting weapons on offense too. Like Fanon is look good, Tillman looks good. They're like you said Judkins, I think he's creating on his own. He looks tackles. Yes. So I don't know. They have like three good running backs, Judkins and Sampson.

[Danny Heifetz]

Seems like it'll be a really good like a really well suited complimentary duo for a while. Miles Garrett had multiple double teams that he just beat both guys which was incredible. And also Jordan Love had a brutal interception three minutes left that also helped them like Michael Parsons had a couple flags like it was stuff the packers said. I think think the most penalties the packers have had in the game in like 15 years. But I do want to shout out. Andre schmidt hit a 55 yard game winner career saving kick because he had the field goal and the extra point missed. And I have to say a lot of people, some people you know, calling him Andre shit, I called him vowel challenged. I have to just read this from espn. I didn't know this. For Schmidt it was the kick. The game winning kick was an opportunity at redemption after a tumultuous few weeks. Schmidt, who kicked in the UFL before joining the Browns practice squad late last season, revealed post game that his mother died from a brain aneurysm in July. And then everyone made fun of him for his last name in week one when he missed the kick. But so I'm not gonna lie I'm really happy that he made this kick and beat the Packers. It's pretty awesome.

[Danny Kelly]

That was a crazy game. I couldn't. This was one of those games where you're watching and the packers just letting the Browns hang around. They're hanging around.

[Danny Heifetz]

I think that's actually a good loss for the packers long term because, like, that's a good lesson. Like. Like they really.

[Danny Kelly]

They're starting to feel themselves a little bit too much.

[Greg Horbeck]

All the super bowl teams, like the Chiefs years, like, they always just would like lose to the Broncos or something like 16 to 10 in week four. You need that. The Ravens lost to the Raiders. Like, the good team's got to have one punch in the face early on in the season.

[Danny Heifetz]

All these guys are on Instagram and Tick tock and they see all the stuff saying packers are simple favorites and they're like, oh, we lost to the Browns. You'll remember that all year now. It's probably gonna happen.

[Danny Kelly]

Austin sense a stat here. Cleveland is allowing 19 yards per drive, best in the league, but more than three yards. Wild. That's wild. They're only giving up 19 yards per drive.

[Greg Horbeck]

And again, like, they play Joe Burrow, Lamar Jackson and Jordan Love.

[Danny Heifetz]

Yeah.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah. Great call.

[Danny Heifetz]

It's so over. I was. It's so over for the Raiders. The Raiders, they lost 41 to 24. It wasn't that close.

[Danny Kelly]

Competitive yet right now.

[Danny Heifetz]

They got rocked by Marcus Morodi. The offensive line for the Raiders is a mess. Ashton Genti has no juice. Negative yards before contact. Still. Honestly, Cam Scatterable looks better. Chip Kelly, no juice. Pete Carroll, looks like.

[Greg Horbeck]

You're not. You're not right?

[Danny Kelly]

You're taking. You're taking Genti a hundred times out of a hundred if you offer a trade straight up.

[Danny Heifetz]

No, that's not true. I would. I would never.

[Danny Kelly]

100.

[Danny Heifetz]

I would not.

[Danny Kelly]

You're full of.

[Danny Heifetz]

No, I'm not. I'm not. There were the few Bowers looks like Jake Tonjis like, this is to the Raiders. It's tough. It's tough right now.

[Greg Horbeck]

The feud.

[Danny Kelly]

What is the Raiders do to you? Why are you so mad right now?

[Danny Heifetz]

That's. It was a pathetic game. It's pathetic. That's concerning the Raiders.

[Greg Horbeck]

A few runs that Genti gets loose. I still think he looks great when he gets loose.

[Danny Kelly]

He just.

[Danny Heifetz]

No, I know the Raiders. It's almost like drafting a running back doesn't fix your offensive line and putting Saquon behind either. Like the history of the running back thing's really simple. Put him on the best offensive line in the NFL like Zeke Elliott or Saquon Eagles and Zeke to the Cowboys. That works. Give McCaffrey to Kyle Shanahan. Give Todd Gurley to Sean McVeigh. That works. Otherwise it doesn't fucking work. It was a bad idea for the Raiders to take him. It's been three games, but I feel like that's true.

[Danny Kelly]

Also.

[Danny Heifetz]

Bowers isn't healthy and Bowers not healthy is really sad.

[Danny Kelly]

The Bowers thing has been a big deal, I think because he's. He's like obviously a huge focal point of their offense. If he's not creating on his own. It's tough. But I will say the Raiders, basically their offensive. Their offensive line is so bad, it's like a non starter. You can't even. You can't even dream of having an offense with an offensive line that is performing this way. I want to read some stats here. Geno Smith was pressured on 65% of his drop backs in Week 3. He was pressured on 22 out of 34 drop backs, which was by far the worst in the NFL through. Through three games. He's been pressured on 44% of his dropbacks, which is the worst in the NFL. He's somehow still middle of the pack in EPA per play.

[Greg Horbeck]

He's.

[Danny Kelly]

He's keeping it together. Just, you know, it's because he's ripping.

[Greg Horbeck]

The ball and making big plays out.

[Danny Heifetz]

It's also really. They played Washington, the Chargers are good defense. They played Washington and the Patriots the other two weeks. Those aren't, those aren't great.

[Danny Kelly]

Patriots have a front, I would say, sure, but.

[Danny Heifetz]

But the Raiders have a terrible front that's like that.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah. The ra. Well, that's my point is like Genty Bowers, all these guys, Myers and Gino, like none of them are gonna be able to do what they really are capable of doing if they're under pressure 65% of the time like that you can't do anything about. Like they need to. Chip Kelly needs to figure a way to mitigate that Genti has been hit at or behind the line of scrimmage on 70% of his carry. Like it's a non starter. They need to, they need to mitigate how somehow this offensive line. But I mean, at the end of the day, like they're just not going to be good that, you know, it's tough.

[Ad/Promo Announcer]

This message is a paid partnership with Apple Card. There's one thing I'm going to make sure I pack for my summer vacation. It's my Apple Card I can earn up to 3% daily cash back on every purchase, including fuel for my car and booking places to stay. Plus, I don't have to worry about fees, including foreign transaction fees, which is perfect when I'm planning to travel abroad. To get an Apple Card for your summer travels, apply in the Wallet app on your iPhone today. Subject to credit approval. Apple Card issued by Goldman Sachs Bank USA Salt Lake City Branch. Variable APRs for Apple Card range from 18.24% to 28.49% based on creditworthiness rates as of July 1, 2025. Terms and [e-mail] this message is a paid partnership with Apple Card. If there's one thing I'm going to make sure I pack for my summer vacation, it's my Apple Card. I can earn up to 3% daily cash back on every purchase, including fuel for my car and booking places to stay. Plus I don't have to worry about fees, including foreign transaction fees, which is perfect when I'm planning to travel abroad. To get an Apple Card for your summer travels, apply in the Wallet app on your iPhone today. Subject to credit approval. Apple Card issued by Goldman Sachs Bank USA Salt Lake City Branch. Variable APRs for Apple Card range from 18.24% to 28.49% based on creditworthiness rates as of July 1, 2025.

[Danny Heifetz]

Terms and [e-mail] this episode is sponsored by American Eagle. So it's official. American Eagle just launched their exclusive limited edition collab with true colors by Travis Kelce, and we could not be more excited to check it out. From sweater polos to loose and baggy pants to comfy sets, there's literally something for everyone. They also dropped a handful of incredibly comfy graphic tees that you can easily wear on repeat with relaxed cargos or jeans. If you're a huge fan or just love the collab, shop the first drop now before it's gone. You can check it all [e-mail] or just go to the store. Debutante Ball Summer Turn Pretty just ended. Craig, this is what launched that category, is it?

[Greg Horbeck]

I don't. I never watched that show.

[Danny Heifetz]

Oh, you just thought about debutante balls without watching that show?

[Danny Kelly]

Do they have a lot of debutante balls in Virginia? I feel like they probably do.

[Greg Horbeck]

Probably South.

[Danny Kelly]

Craig, what's the word on the street?

[Danny Heifetz]

Yeah, he's the most fucking west coast people ever.

[Greg Horbeck]

Is that not incorrect? That's super correct. The south has the most debutante balls, I would say, of any region in America. Okay.

[Danny Heifetz]

Anyway, yeah, summer twin print is in Massachusetts, but.

[Greg Horbeck]

Yeah, again, I haven't seen the show. I'm not. I'm just.

[Danny Heifetz]

It's Conrad's Joker.

[Danny Kelly]

I'm gonna Google debutante ball per capita.

[Danny Heifetz]

I mean, it's.

[Greg Horbeck]

It's the South. I feel confident it's the South.

[Danny Kelly]

What.

[Greg Horbeck]

What does Gemini say?

[Danny Heifetz]

Dk. It's just ironic because most.

[Greg Horbeck]

Jamie pull that up.

[Danny Heifetz]

Most people live in the real south would be like, Virginia's naughty. They don't even want Virginia to count. It's funny, that's all.

[Danny Kelly]

There's a lot. There's debutante balls in a lot of states. Virginia has one in Chantilly, Etric and Richmond.

[Danny Heifetz]

Mechanicsville.

[Danny Kelly]

Not seen Mechanicsville.

[Danny Heifetz]

Tyler Warren, Mechanicsville.

[Danny Kelly]

Anyway, we can continue looking off the rails.

[Greg Horbeck]

Yeah, it is. All right, the point of this segment is to say that the Chargers are. Are graduating from. From being the Chargers. They are now becoming a team that wins at the end of games. They are. They are graduating from the wonky, shitty endings. And we go, oh, classic Chargers loss. That's no longer the case. They're 3. 0 in the Madison Beer era. Shouts out my boy Herbie. The game that they won today.

[Danny Kelly]

Herbie fully loaded.

[Greg Horbeck]

He's fully loaded. Well, yeah, he's fully unloaded, probably.

[Danny Kelly]

Maybe that's the difference. Maybe that's what he needed.

[Danny Heifetz]

He's loose.

[Greg Horbeck]

This is a game. The game today was a game the Chargers lose historically. You know what I mean?

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah.

[Greg Horbeck]

And they didn't. And Herbert had an awesome fourth quarter drive. I think he had the play of the day. The game winning touchdown to Keenan Allen where he gets hit and spun around in the pocket. They're like 20 yards from the end zone. He's running to his left. He has to like turn his body all the way around with Nick Bonito in his face. He like sidearm rifles a ball. I don't even know how he could see where he's throwing. And it is perfectly in Keenan Allen's hands.

[Danny Heifetz]

That was shortest of short list for like throw of the year. Throw the season so far. When we do it at the end of the year, that'll be on the list.

[Greg Horbeck]

Yes. The. The Chargers are already. They're two and oh, and one score games already this year. And dude, if you look at their schedule, I'm like a mini Chargers fan. I just like want to be a Chargers fan because they don't have quarterback.

[Danny Heifetz]

Yeah, you were the searching quarterback for.

[Greg Horbeck]

Yeah, that's probably why. But also, they don't have any fans. I would love to Be a fan. Like, I could probably sit front row at the games because there's no one there, I don't think. But there should be. They should have more fans. They're like, this is like if you live in LA or you don't get in now because this team's going to be awesome for a long time.

[Danny Heifetz]

I think think it is awesome, like, because now the Broncos have lost. There's this crazy stat that the Broncos lost their last two games even though they were winning the entire fourth quarter. Because the Broncos weren't built last two games.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah. They were trailed for zero seconds on.

[Danny Heifetz]

The last play of the game is zero seconds left. And like, I just remember reading that. Like, that's the most Chargers stat I've ever heard.

[Greg Horbeck]

100.

[Danny Heifetz]

That you could lose two weeks in a row.

[Danny Kelly]

Broncos, what's the. There's like a movie about this, like, or whatever.

[Danny Heifetz]

Freaky Friday.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah. You're like passing on something.

[Danny Heifetz]

This is the sequel. Yeah. The Broncos and Chargers casting the curse onto Denver. Dude, really though.

[Greg Horbeck]

But it's like they're three and oh, and if you look at their schedule, their next games they play, the Giants, the Commanders, the Dolphins, the Colts, the Vikings, the Titans, the Steelers, Jags, Raiders. Like, dude, I think the Chargers are going to be 10 and 2 especially.

[Danny Heifetz]

Everything I was worried about hasn't been an issue. The defensive. Any lack of talent, like the defense. Signing Puna Ford at defensive tackle has been an awesome little mack. Missing time hasn't been.

[Greg Horbeck]

Derwin James has been one of the best defensive players in the league this year.

[Danny Heifetz]

Rashawn Slater. The. Hasn't. It hasn't been super. A huge deal yet that Slater's not there. And then also, obviously I, I, you know, I was just concerned about just Greg Roman having an adult passing game. And also, not only is it not weird. Quinn Johnson. Quinn Johnson's been incredible.

[Danny Kelly]

He might be.

[Greg Horbeck]

Damn right he has.

[Danny Kelly]

He might be real. He might be legit.

[Greg Horbeck]

When are we going to say every week I'm like, hey, he had another good week. Do we care?

[Danny Kelly]

And you're like, well, I still think he has rocks for hands, but it might not matter. It's like, there's a lot of.

[Greg Horbeck]

There's a lot of really good catch today.

[Danny Heifetz]

I refuse to believe in training when players who can't catch have training camp stories written that, hey, I think I learned to catch this year, made a good catch in camp. I don't care. This week, I will say there were multiple catches. Quentin Johnson had that. I'm like, I don't know if he makes that the past couple years, I'm.

[Greg Horbeck]

Prepared to say that he might be the best playmaker on the Chargers. That's my intrusive thought.

[Danny Heifetz]

If you had just watched this season on like complete, like if you had only watched the last three games, you would be like, oh, that's the receiver that took in the first round. Yeah, definitely.

[Greg Horbeck]

Like, unfortunately for somebody, for people who drafted Lad McConkey like myself in the ringer league, I think he's the number three. He is the number three option on the team right now. I, I like, I think he'll, he'll have a solid year and whatnot. But Quentin Johnson is the wide receiver five in fantasy and Keenan Allen is the wide receiver six in fantasy right now. Those are Herbert's two favorite options.

[Danny Heifetz]

That's incredible.

[Danny Kelly]

Also, he threw to Hampton. He had six passes to Hampton.

[Danny Heifetz]

Keenan Allen was such an under the radar guy. He signed with the Chargers like a week and a half before. Fourth this season and those things almost never matter. But he just went back. I mean, again, he had caught, I believe, more passes from Herbert than anybody. And just, it's amazing.

[Danny Kelly]

He just, he caught that touchdown that Craig was talking about earlier.

[Greg Horbeck]

He did, yeah. Like they, they have a, a more fully rounded offensive system now with kind of different types of guys that can.

[Danny Kelly]

Do different things and also their pass rate over expectation. I think this year has been really high. Again, like, they are not, they're not the, they're not the team, the offense or the identity that people kind of, I think, picture with them.

[Greg Horbeck]

No. And then, I mean, the running game got, got neutered today because Najee Harris tore his Achilles, which was brutal.

[Danny Kelly]

Just sad.

[Greg Horbeck]

And it was in the most tough day for injuries. The thing that sucks about the Achilles tears, it's, it's so innocuous. It's just, it's just like such an easy motion. Anybody can do it. He was just stepping back to begin to run towards the off like the line. Like it was just what you do every play as a running back and.

[Danny Kelly]

It can just pop.

[Greg Horbeck]

It's not like the ACL or something like that where it's a violent cut or you get hit in a weird way.

[Danny Heifetz]

It's just so pickleball, you know, running back, pickleball.

[Greg Horbeck]

Same motion, same motion, high. Fits his hamstring on the Bachelor. It's all the same, man.

[Danny Heifetz]

I really, I really, me and Mike Evans today. Really, really, you know, kinship, I will say.

[Greg Horbeck]

Anyway, Chargers, that's my debut.

[Danny Heifetz]

I want to, I want to get to an important, important segment. Now, speaking of receivers. Okay, this is fart. Fart or shark.

[Greg Horbeck]

Yeah.

[Danny Heifetz]

Just remind people America's favorite segment. Yeah, it's important. Is this like a fart?

[Greg Horbeck]

We should sell this to first take. They would. I mean, come on. How much could we point far to shirt?

[Danny Heifetz]

Is this something? You know, both are stinky. One will go away in a little bit. One is. One's One's a really big deal. One's something that's going to be an issue for quite some time and no one will ever forget it.

[Greg Horbeck]

What? One you can stay at the dinner. The other you have to leave.

[Danny Heifetz]

Fart is like Al Roker farts at the White House. No one even knows Al Roker shirts at the White House. It defines your life.

[Greg Horbeck]

It's national news.

[Danny Heifetz]

So with that said, dk.

[Danny Kelly]

Oh, you have to. You're going to ask me.

[Greg Horbeck]

Marvin Harrison Jr. What are you talking about?

[Danny Kelly]

That's the rule.

[Danny Heifetz]

Marvin Harrison Jr dropped three passes today.

[Greg Horbeck]

God.

[Danny Heifetz]

Two touchdowns and a third down. Farter sharp. Marvin Harrison Jr wildly disappointing. So far Fart.

[Danny Kelly]

He's still gonna be fine. He's. He doesn't suck.

[Greg Horbeck]

Grow the fuck.

[Danny Kelly]

Johnson can figure out how to catch the ball. Marvin Harrison can do it.

[Greg Horbeck]

He's like the. The guy who they said everyone said was the best wide receiver in the last five years. He can't catch a pass.

[Danny Heifetz]

At what point can we acknowledge that if Malik neighbors had been named Marvin Harrison Jr. And Marvin Harrison Jr. Had not been named. Had been named Robert woods, it wouldn't have been close?

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah, yeah, you keep. You keep saying that. It still doesn't move me, but yeah, he's a good player. He's gonna be fine.

[Greg Horbeck]

Is he?

[Danny Kelly]

He's definitely very disappointing relative to what's good about him. He's made some plays. He had 800 yards last year.

[Danny Heifetz]

I will acknowledge bad. I think one of the drops.

[Danny Kelly]

Perspective.

[Danny Heifetz]

One of the drops was immediately after James Connor, like destroyed his ankle.

[Danny Kelly]

Ankle.

[Danny Heifetz]

And I. That's. I'll give you a free pass for that.

[Danny Kelly]

He's two other ones in his own head. He's in his own head. He's doing.

[Greg Horbeck]

He's.

[Danny Kelly]

He's like clapping at. At the. It's weird.

[Danny Heifetz]

Well, biceps are so big.

[Danny Kelly]

Maybe the range of motion is like, not very good.

[Danny Heifetz]

He's got. The shapes are just so huge.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah.

[Greg Horbeck]

We should get him on the NFL version of the Haney Project.

[Danny Kelly]

I think if you're telling. I think the. The definition.

[Greg Horbeck]

Chris Haney, the guy who. The golf coach, he used to He. He. He hosted a show called the Haney Project where he would bring people in who had broken golf swings.

[Danny Heifetz]

Was that Hank Haney?

[Greg Horbeck]

Yeah. And Charles Barkley went on. It was like, a whole thing.

[Danny Kelly]

Thing.

[Greg Horbeck]

You don't remember that?

[Danny Heifetz]

I thought you said Chris Haney.

[Greg Horbeck]

Oh, did I? Sorry. Whatever. The show's called the Haney Project now. You never heard of that show?

[Danny Heifetz]

I guess I knew that happened. I didn't know it was a show. I just remember I just seen the videos of Hank Haney trying to help Charles Barkley. That's the only thing I saw.

[Greg Horbeck]

We need to get that dk. You should go help Marvin Harrison.

[Danny Kelly]

Here's the deal.

[Danny Heifetz]

We could get. Do you think there's a former, like, hall of Fame receiver that we could get to help, like, do the show, get him to catch up? Maybe played for the Colts?

[Greg Horbeck]

Oh, yeah. Maybe, like, to host the show. But he has to know him really well.

[Danny Heifetz]

Yeah.

[Greg Horbeck]

Better if you knew Marvin Harrison Jr. Really well.

[Danny Heifetz]

Yeah, yeah. I'm trying to think of maybe, like, Reggie Wayne. He's a coach.

[Greg Horbeck]

Reggie. Ty Hilton, maybe.

[Danny Heifetz]

Ty Hilton. Yeah.

[Greg Horbeck]

Yeah, he'd be good. Dk. Do you have any ideas of who could help Dallas Clark, maybe?

[Danny Heifetz]

Dallas Clark is probably right.

[Danny Kelly]

That would be good.

[Danny Heifetz]

Michael Pittman had a big day.

[Greg Horbeck]

Yeah. Is there any. I don't know. I feel like we're missing one. Do you think anyone else could help Marvin Harrison catch the ball?

[Danny Kelly]

Oh, God.

[Danny Heifetz]

Dante Moncrief.

[Greg Horbeck]

He had a couple moments.

[Danny Heifetz]

Yeah.

[Danny Kelly]

Who's that big tight end from tcu? That's, like, the biggest guy in the mo.

[Greg Horbeck]

Ali Coxy.

[Danny Heifetz]

Football achievements.

[Greg Horbeck]

If you can think of a better option.

[Danny Heifetz]

Yeah, I can't. I don't know.

[Danny Kelly]

I can't think of one.

[Danny Heifetz]

Anyway.

[Danny Kelly]

I just want to. I just want to be clear. I'm not, like, caping for him. He's obviously been really, really disappointing. I just don't think he actually sucks. I think he's gonna be fine.

[Greg Horbeck]

What does fine mean?

[Danny Heifetz]

Yeah, that. Thank you, Craig.

[Danny Kelly]

Well, okay. A shirt, in my opinion, would be like, this guy sucks.

[Danny Heifetz]

If he's fine. That is a shark. He's 100% fourth in the draft.

[Danny Kelly]

So that. That. Okay. According to that definition, yeah, it was a shark.

[Greg Horbeck]

Do you think he will ever be a perennial top 10 fantasy wide receiver?

[Danny Kelly]

That. I don't know. Shark. Okay. You guys are creating new definitions of sharp.

[Danny Heifetz]

He's the fourth.

[Danny Kelly]

Your definition of shark is not a perennial top 10.

[Danny Heifetz]

No, it doesn't have to be that. It's. The idea is not for the fourth overall pick. You see happiness is expecting. Is he gonna be John Ross minus reality?

[Greg Horbeck]

Okay, well if he's John Ross, it's more than a Shark.

[Danny Kelly]

It's gonna be Corey Davis. No, I think he's gonna be a good player in the league for of a lot long time.

[Greg Horbeck]

We're setting the bar quite low. If we're saying is he going to be.

[Danny Kelly]

You're setting it so high. I think let's meet in the middle somewhere.

[Greg Horbeck]

I think being a top 10 receiver is not a high bar for the fourth overall pick in the draft. I think that's. That is what you should do. Am I crazy? The fourth overall pick should be a top 10 wide receiver.

[Danny Kelly]

Okay. If you have one, you're in. It's fine. Just chill. Just relax.

[Greg Horbeck]

I would argue that most of the receivers who are now top 10 receivers in the league you knew within the first.

[Danny Kelly]

What about Nico?

[Greg Horbeck]

19 games of his career. Yeah, but Nico called the financier who.

[Danny Heifetz]

Fumbled the game away.

[Greg Horbeck]

He was not the fourth pick in the draft.

[Danny Kelly]

That's fair. Yeah.

[Danny Heifetz]

While we're here, D.K. farter, Shart. Michael, ask someone else.

[Greg Horbeck]

The rule is we have to ask Craig.

[Danny Heifetz]

Craig, he doesn't take artists. He doesn't pay attention when we tell.

[Greg Horbeck]

Him that he doesn't remember that every we do this.

[Danny Heifetz]

He doesn't know it's only me.

[Greg Horbeck]

Yes.

[Danny Heifetz]

It's been that way for like a year.

[Danny Kelly]

Okay, do it again.

[Danny Heifetz]

The Panthers lost today. Sorry. The Panthers beat the falcons today. A 30 to nothing shart. All right, great. There he goes. No, really. Michael Penck Jr. Was benched when it was 27. Nothing. Michael Penck Jr. Today pretty incredible stat from Austin. Gail burning down the rainforest to find this one. When if you look at EPA per drop back this season and just look at unpressured like no pressure.

[Danny Kelly]

Clean pocket.

[Danny Heifetz]

Clean pocket. Michael Penck Jr. Dead last at EPA for drop back this season. Season clean pockets for sharp Michael Pennix Jr. And the Falcons offense looking completely neutered by Carolina gave up the most points in NFL history last year.

[Danny Kelly]

Goose egg against the Panthers. That's a shark.

[Danny Heifetz]

I, I'm. I can't.

[Danny Kelly]

The last two games he's been very bad.

[Danny Heifetz]

Every time Bijan Robinson touches the ball I'm like well he's the best player in the NFL. And then the Falcons don't get another first down after. But I just. There's a lot. We don't have to go into everything but I mean the operational stuff is a mess for someone who played a lot of college Football like Michael Petty. They called timeout on third and one. They come out of the timeout, there's a delay a game which is like drives me up a wall. The headsets went out like I understand that happens sometimes. But then it's like he throws a brutal pick six and then also just, it's not threatening. Like I think the whole game to me summarized is the Panthers fumbled a punt and the Falcons recovered it at the Panthers 31. The Falcons did not gain a yard and then missed the kick which I think really summarizes the entire game.

[Greg Horbeck]

Look, as a, as a Michael Pennix supporter, I'm not going to comment on today's performance.

[Danny Heifetz]

It's Michael Penn. Here's a funny stat that's a little bad faith, but it's funny. Michael Penix is 0 and 4 when the other team scores 7 points.

[Greg Horbeck]

My God.

[Danny Heifetz]

Which is a little bad faith because he went to overtime twice. I don't care. It's funny to say so anyway. Yeah it's just, you know, remember that time the Falcons traded the first round pick next year.

[Danny Kelly]

So the last two games he's 31 of 57 for 300 yards and two picks. He's averaging five yards per attempt. 55 passer rating, 32% success rate. Rate.

[Greg Horbeck]

Okay, wait, hold on. I got it.

[Danny Kelly]

21 off target rate. He's, he's super inaccurate. He's not hitting any throws. Turning the ball over.

[Greg Horbeck]

Was this his sixth start? I feel like we think Michael Penix has been starting for a year. He has not. This was his sixth game as an NFL player.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah, he's been, he's been worse than J.J. mcCarthy.

[Greg Horbeck]

It's J.J. mcCarthy played like a game.

[Danny Kelly]

And a half but okay.

[Danny Heifetz]

Again it's I, no defense is the same every year. The Panthers defensive coordinator, like he's good but like they give the most points ever. Lester.

[Danny Kelly]

Oh yeah, and I are arguing over hyphens. Sorry. No, it's funny if it's. What'd you say?

[Danny Heifetz]

It never matters. Intrusive thoughts. Honestly. On that note, you know what this is like we're going back to the true sense of intrusive thoughts you just thought today. And I was like wow, I can't believe I thought that. And like this isn't a, it's not even a take purge. I just thought this things I thought today maybe Bryce Young over C.J. stroud was actually a good draft pick. It occurred to me today, I can't.

[Danny Kelly]

I can't refute it completely.

[Danny Heifetz]

I, I, I thought maybe they maybe they got the right guy. I don't think Bryce Young played that well.

[Danny Kelly]

I know. I was gonna say, is Bryce Young even, like, playing that well?

[Greg Horbeck]

Right. Not really.

[Danny Heifetz]

No.

[Greg Horbeck]

But it's just more a testament to how bad Stroud has been.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Danny Heifetz]

I also had an intrusive thought. Drake May has so much Carson Wentz in him.

[Danny Kelly]

Oh, wow. Yeah.

[Danny Heifetz]

It's not even intrusive. It's just.

[Danny Kelly]

I'm starting to worry a little bit about May.

[Danny Heifetz]

The Patriots.

[Greg Horbeck]

I thought he made. I guess this is very Wednesday, but I thought he had a lot of really nice throws today.

[Danny Heifetz]

Yeah.

[Greg Horbeck]

But.

[Danny Heifetz]

Yeah, a lot of. He's. He's like the young. Carson wins pre acl. But there's some dumb dude I. The Patriots. I know it's not gonna be like this every week, but. Holy. Five turnovers and it gave the loss by seven points.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah, definitely. I mean, he did have a turnover, but it wasn't.

[Greg Horbeck]

I was like. All the fumbles by the running back, Keith.

[Danny Heifetz]

Yeah. But Drake May threw a pick on third and goal to end the first half.

[Greg Horbeck]

It was tipped. What? It was. I. I thought he. That could have been a completed pass. The guy was open. It was tipped fair.

[Danny Heifetz]

Also had. But the fumble he had in the second half was. Frankly, he looked really stupid. It's one of those where if I try to play quarterback, I worry that I would do shit like that. Like, he was just running and kind of like block. Like, just kind of like threw the ball. It was Levy. It was very Levousy. Like, Drake Bass fumble. He had a very Levy fumble in the preseason. He's a lot of Levis in him, and I don't even want to get into Randre fumbling twice and then Antonio Gibson fumbling. It's just kind of depressing.

[Danny Kelly]

Is Radre ever going to see the field again?

[Danny Heifetz]

Never. Rabel was a little Vrabel actually was like, we need him to get over this. Like, I can't. We can't not play him. FRA was like, defending him. FRA was like, I need this guy to get.

[Danny Kelly]

This has been like a problem. He's been the most fumbling league running back.

[Danny Heifetz]

He leads league in fumbles in the last three years.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah.

[Danny Heifetz]

And then also. I'm sorry. We just have worst. The worst play of the day. I saw years. Pop. Pop Douglas. 4th and 4th down, game on the line. Like, Patriots need to go down and tie the game. Pop Douglas gets the first down and then jumps behind the marker and gets tackled and the game ends.

[Greg Horbeck]

Yeah.

[Danny Heifetz]

Steelers lost by seven.

[Greg Horbeck]

Even that. I I. If you like watching that play, it was like the way he was moving and where the Steeler defender was, like, it makes sense what he did. It looks bad on paper, or you can kind of be like, you should have just went forward, but the way he was, like moving in, the way the route or like the little screen was set up. That's kind of what you do. But I see what you're saying.

[Danny Heifetz]

T.K. neither. Intrusive thoughts.

[Greg Horbeck]

I'm just sucking up to Bill.

[Danny Heifetz]

Put that on the Instagram.

[Danny Kelly]

This is the type of thing that I kind of. I. Typically, my initial gut reaction or whatever is to just scoff and say it's stupid. But today I had the intrusive thought that maybe the Vikings really did just shadow bench JJ McCarthy, like the ankle thing. Like, oh, yeah, by the way, he's got an ankle injury.

[Danny Heifetz]

Yeah.

[Danny Kelly]

And then like after the game today, Kevin o' Connell was like, yeah, yeah, he's still hurt.

[Greg Horbeck]

Pretty super hurt.

[Danny Kelly]

Like, he didn't even give him a chance. He's like, no, we're playing Wentz again. He earned a second chance. So I think maybe my more nuanced, intrusive thought is that I'm wondering if the Vikings are just going to keep rolling with Wentz for as long as it works.

[Danny Heifetz]

Do you think that McCarthy just ends up out for this season, too? And then once again, he meets with Kevin OConnell for like one hour a week to get the mental reps for the next year.

[Greg Horbeck]

Carson Wentz signs a hundred million dollar deal with the Steelers next year.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah. God. So here's the deal. I mean, big picture, Carson Wentz played fine. So. So the offense could work, right? Like, he. He operated within the confines of the offense.

[Danny Heifetz]

Game manager CARSON, Right.

[Danny Kelly]

And J.J. mcCarthy, the way he was playing outside of that fourth quarter against the Bears was like, you can't run an offense like this. He's taking too long on everything. It's like, that was the big deal is like, he's just too slow. He's. The ball's not coming out. And when it does come out, he's late to.

[Greg Horbeck]

Or whatever.

[Danny Kelly]

He's throwing behind guys, blah, blah, blah. And Kevin o'. Connell. This was from Lindsay Theory. She said before the game. This is before even Carson Wentz played. He said, Carson Wentz has the ability, I think I'm paraphrasing here. Carson Wentz has the ability to, with his comfort level, to bring some aspects of the offense that they haven't been able to tap into this season. And that's kind of just reading between lines is like he's just able to run the offense that we want to read.

[Danny Heifetz]

Run completing passes.

[Danny Kelly]

Right.

[Danny Heifetz]

Multiple times.

[Danny Kelly]

According to Next Gen stats, Wentz threw a quick pass, which is under 2 1/2 seconds on 60% of his past attempts. 9 and 12, 101 yards and 2 touchdowns on those throws. So he's the. The focus. Focus of this was get the ball out quickly, which was the biggest problem JJ McCarthy was having. According to Next Gen Sets the Weeks 1 and 2, McCarthy had a quick pass on just 17% of his drop back. So that was a huge difference. And if you look at the Vikings schedule, it's pretty brutal. I know the Steelers aren't like, blowing up on defense right now. They're not very good on defense. But they're playing at the Steelers next week at the Browns. They have their buy. Eagles, Chargers, Lions, Ravens.

[Greg Horbeck]

Yikes.

[Danny Kelly]

That is a brutal stretch.

[Danny Heifetz]

Crazy.

[Danny Kelly]

And so I'm just curious how this is going to go. Like, if Wentz can continue kind of like run the offense the way, you know, because. Because just the way they want to run it. Get the ball out quickly, get it to their playmakers. You know, TJ Hawkinson was resurrected from the dead today. Looked pretty good. Just. And Jordan Mason was running all over the place.

[Danny Heifetz]

Like Christian Darasol was back at left tackle, which was big.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah. And I'm not even saying I'm giving up on J.J. mcCarthy. I'm just saying I'm wondering how they're going to play this because they have such an absolutely brutal schedule coming out well.

[Greg Horbeck]

And their roster's good. Like they, they might just not be a team that needs a rookie right now.

[Danny Kelly]

Now. Right. De facto Rookie. Yeah.

[Danny Heifetz]

If JG McCarthy was the guy who's played one game.

[Danny Kelly]

Right. Two.

[Greg Horbeck]

Okay.

[Danny Kelly]

He got hurt in the second game.

[Greg Horbeck]

I guess he did play the whole game.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah.

[Danny Heifetz]

Any other intrusive thoughts?

[Greg Horbeck]

I. I sometimes I think Caleb is. Is going to really work with Ben Johnson and I'm like, this, this is going to like, be a massive success. Like, I, whenever a play works, I'm like, this is going to be. Be really, really successful one day.

[Danny Heifetz]

I feel bad that Bears fans probably think of me as hating Caleb Williams because I've been critical of him. But like, I spent most of last off season thinking Caleb Williams would just be Aaron Rodgers.

[Greg Horbeck]

Yeah, I, like, I don't. Again, that's truly an intrusive thought because I, I also have been quite critical of him and I, I don't think he looks good most of the time. But when it does look good, I do think that with Ben Johnson and I, I think Ben Johnson is the real deal. I'm like, oh, I, I think there's a chance that the Bears are just like the best, one of the best offenses in the NFL for the next five years.

[Danny Heifetz]

The thing I, I do want to just remind people about with Caleb Williams is do you know how Aaron Rodgers played in his second season? He didn't fucking play for three years. And like maybe the NFL contract structure hasn't exactly incentivized the right way to actually develop a goddamn quarterback. And maybe that's why guys like Carson Wentz can come in and have 48 points today or whatever. But yeah, no, I, I agree, Craig.

[Danny Kelly]

It's nice, I gotta say for me personally, it's nice not being the Caleb defender on this pod today.

[Danny Heifetz]

He's good. Play of the day. I mean the block kicks, I mean the, the Jordan Davis one is probably it like, but we can go through the other ones.

[Greg Horbeck]

Maybe the Herbert throw.

[Danny Heifetz]

The other. Yeah, the Herbert throw. The, I mean the Browns block kick. The 55 yarder. There's, I want to shout out was six.

[Danny Kelly]

Speaking of Caleb, the flea flicker was sick.

[Danny Heifetz]

I want to shout out Calais Campbell who forced what could have been the game winning safety. I just, he's 39. It is just, it wasn't like the best play of the day. It's just unbelievable. There's a 39 year old defensive end actually making game breaking plays.

[Danny Kelly]

Just, he's just one of one type player. Yeah.

[Greg Horbeck]

I gotta say, I saw a compilation the other day of Jerry Rice clips after the age of 40 when he.

[Danny Kelly]

Was playing for the Seahawks. Seahawks legend Jerry Rice, it's, I mean.

[Greg Horbeck]

He'S moving a little slow out there, but for Christ's sake, The man was 40 and 41, I think 42 years old. And he looked awesome and I like it just made me rethink sometimes. And we're like, oh, Keenan Allen's 33. I'm like, Jerry Rice is 10 years older and like looked solid out there. Just unbelievable.

[Danny Kelly]

Craig Heifetz, didn't you do a write up back in the day about Jerry Rice?

[Danny Heifetz]

Yeah, my, one of my, I, I, I, I spent a long time trying to figure out a way to. It was when Larry Fitzgerald became the second leading receiver ever. And I just wanted to write a post entirely about how an excuse to talk about Jerry Rice's record. And I spent a long time trying to figure out a visual way to do it. And I like the Way I, I, I can like post it on like Instagram.

[Danny Kelly]

The way that, the way that he kind of like did this data viz, if you will it. It's like Jerry Rice's receiving record is so absurdly. There's no one's ever going to.

[Danny Heifetz]

I just pulled it up. So Larry Fitzgerald, it's pretty great. It's so Larry Fitzgerald has the second most receiving yards ever. And so it's like here's how many players have receiving yards that start with like just, let's call it like 10,000 to 11,000. Like just call. It starts with a 10. Eight players have or, sorry, 13 guys. It starts with a 10. You look at 11,000, there's eight guys. 12,000, there's like eight guys. 13,000. There's like six guys that have between 13 and 14,000. 14,000, it's like six guys, 15,000. It's like five guys. Nobody has 16,000. Nobody has 17,000. Nobody has 18,000. Nobody's 19,000. Nobody has 20,000. Nobody's 21,000. Jerry Rice has like 22 and a half thousand.

[Danny Kelly]

So fucking wild.

[Danny Heifetz]

It is actually. It is crazy how much room he put between him and everybody else.

[Danny Kelly]

It's insane, dude.

[Greg Horbeck]

Jerry.

[Danny Heifetz]

Where there wasn't as many passing yards.

[Danny Kelly]

I know that was in the era when they were running all.

[Danny Heifetz]

It's closer to like Dan Marino throwing 48 touchdowns. And then it took like 40 years for someone to match it. And it's like that doesn't even count, dude.

[Greg Horbeck]

Jerry Rice in 1997, which was his age 35 season, tore his ACL and MCL, came back and then cracked his kneecap. That's at 35 years old. Five years later, at age 40, his season, he had 92 catches, 1200 yards and seven touchdowns at age 40.

[Danny Kelly]

That's for who?

[Greg Horbeck]

For Oakland?

[Danny Heifetz]

Yeah, the Raiders. He was good for the Raiders.

[Greg Horbeck]

He was good at age 45 years after tearing his knee in half as a 35 year old.

[Danny Heifetz]

The other thing is when Granny Moss Moss broke the record. How I feel like they made such a big deal when Randy Moss had the 23 touchdowns in the, in the 2007. You know, like the Colts 20, 25 Colts season seven Patriots. Randy Moss said the 23 touchdowns, he broke Jerry Rice's record. Jerry Rice did that in like 12 games. And I think it might have been some replacement players, but even that's just kind of funny to think about.

[Greg Horbeck]

But yeah, he did it in 12 games, 1265 catches.

[Danny Heifetz]

Was it 83 with the year? Yeah, 87, 80. Was that the strike here.

[Greg Horbeck]

I don't know. Probably.

[Danny Heifetz]

The. Yeah, it's 87. That's a little asterisky, but still I guess he's doing against like insurance agents. But regardless, he was good. Incredible.

[Greg Horbeck]

He was good.

[Danny Heifetz]

Shout out Jerry Rice. Email us other fun facts. Ringer fantasy football gmail.com I Jerry. Right. Yeah, it's. It's amazing. Okay. Other plays of the day. We hit all those. Oh, I. The last thing I want to. It's not a play but just Baker Mayfield just Buccaneers are three and oh, and the Bucks just coming back.

[Danny Kelly]

Baker Mayfield just everyone. He's a walking fucking cliche.

[Danny Heifetz]

He's hurt. His hands hurt. Mike Evans is hurt. Ibuka's hurt. Everyone in the books is hurt. And they're three and oh, and it's awesome. So they're. They're the grittiest team.

[Danny Kelly]

He makes some of some of the most incredible two yard scrambles I've ever seen in my life. The fact he didn't get sacked for an eight yard loss and turns it into a two yard scramble. Some of he has some of the best 2 yards.

[Danny Heifetz]

The impossible to hate. Unless you like I guess went to Kansas. I think Baker's impossible to hate. Worst play of the day. Gotta say to Rod Taylor throwing a pick six at the. And a halftime sad all the.

[Greg Horbeck]

There was a bad pick sixes. Cam Ward's pick six was really bad.

[Danny Heifetz]

Third play of the game bad.

[Danny Kelly]

That was like from the 10 yard.

[Danny Heifetz]

Brian Caitlin elected to receive instead of defer and then Cam Ward threw a pick six in the third play of the game.

[Greg Horbeck]

Michael Penix's pick six was horrific.

[Danny Kelly]

Oh, maybe that was the one I was thinking of actually.

[Danny Heifetz]

I mean the Patriots play Patriots four fumbles. There was some bad plays.

[Danny Kelly]

There's some ugly football.

[Danny Heifetz]

Bo Nicks missed Marvin Bo Nicks missed like he hit one deep touchdown. Kind of missed two other ones on a flea flicker which they probably should have won. And then. Yeah. Jordan loves pick with three minutes left and then they lost to the Browns.

[Greg Horbeck]

Rogers had a bad play. Yeah.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah.

[Danny Heifetz]

Lot of bad plays. Yeah. All right. Tom Brady, Magic Johnson tweets. Craig, any Tom Brady lines or any announcer lines that caught you?

[Greg Horbeck]

No, actually the announcer that annoyed me today was. Was Kevin Harlan who did the, did the Broncos game. I don't, I don't like Kevin Harlan doing football. It doesn't feel right. He should be doing basketball. Kevin Harlan is basketball to me.

[Danny Kelly]

I think he's. I think he's good.

[Greg Horbeck]

I think he's great. No, but he, he Dicker. Cameron Dicker was about to kick. And I've. I've never heard of more of an attempt to jinx a kicker than Kevin Harlan. Kevin Harlan said Cameron Dicker, the most accurate kicker in the history of the league for the number of kicks he's attempted, is about to kick. And I was like, shut up, Kevin Harlan. Don't say that, Craig. There was.

[Danny Kelly]

There was one moment when Tom Brady did a Forrest Gump line. Life is like a box of chocolates. I don't know if you caught this, but we had people requesting on Twitter that you do it. Maybe we'll try and find.

[Greg Horbeck]

I'll do it tomorrow.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah, we'll try and find it. But it was, like, not a very good.

[Danny Heifetz]

I had to look up. Brady was like. Because there was the video of George Pickens just taking his helmet and just like. Like, kettle ball, like, just slamming it on the ground, like, over and over again. And Brady was like, yeah, that helmet, you know, it's kind of like going home and, you know, the kicking the family dog.

[Greg Horbeck]

Oh, God.

[Danny Heifetz]

I was like, what? And I was like. And I looked. I. I was like, that's odd. I guess it's a saying. I guess, like, a lot of people. Yeah, my. A lot of people were like, that's weird. And people like, no, my baseball coach said. I guess that is the saying. Regardless, it was bizarre to have George Pickens just, like, break. You know, hard it is to break a helmet. He's, like, shattering the helmet on the sideline or trying to. And then Brady is just like, yep. Just like, going home to the dog.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah.

[Greg Horbeck]

You know, because I'm watching so many games at once, and I'm switching around the audio. I often don't get a lot of the. I need to just one day just lock it and only listen.

[Danny Heifetz]

He hasn't had a good game yet. Like the Bears Cowboy. Like, I feel like a lot of those games. I don't know.

[Danny Kelly]

The one thing I caught on Brady this week was. I think it was the play when Caleb Williams hit DJ Moore in the back of the end zone. I believe it was on a fourth down. Now I'm trying to remember the context. I believe that was a play anyway. Brady was, like, railing against them going forward on fourth down because it was still.

[Danny Heifetz]

He hates the fourth down.

[Danny Kelly]

The game was within, like, 10 points or something like that. They're winning by 10 late in the game, and Brady's like, this.

[Danny Heifetz]

This is.

[Danny Kelly]

I'm. I'm old school. Just take the points, like, you whatever. And then they Scored a touchdown. He's like. And then he did the classic thing, just like I said, you gotta go for it here in this situation. It's like, okay, yeah, Brady. But he was fine. He hasn't done anything egregious this year.

[Greg Horbeck]

I feel like there was such a forced joke after. It was the NBC halftime. And, you know, it's, it's Jason Garrett and I forget the other two guys. It's Jason Garrett who's like a Westworld.

[Danny Heifetz]

Yeah, Jason Garrett's like a Westworld robot.

[Greg Horbeck]

They had, like, the most prepared joke where they cut to the Jordan Davis highlight. And, and, and it cuts back to Jason Garrett and he goes, Jordan Davis is 330 pounds. That's like, that's like 100 pounds more than Derek Henry out there. And everyone was like. And then it was just like the most awkward prepared joke. I was like, ah, I like that. Didn't like that at all.

[Danny Heifetz]

I think Jason Garrett's the most unnatural person I've ever seen on tv. Who's smiling all the time.

[Danny Kelly]

Think about how much he's making.

[Greg Horbeck]

You know what?

[Danny Heifetz]

I, I don't like. I actually, I hate him so much. I hate him. I, I, I, I, I, again, I, you know what? I, I, I know the Giants have been batted a long time. My summary of the Giants is really simple. Whatever's going on with the Giants is. Is this simple? Is Jason Garrett coached Dallas for a decade. The Giants watched Jason Garrett coach Dallas for a decade. Then the Giants hired Jason Garrett, and whoever made that decision still runs the Giants. That's it.

[Greg Horbeck]

Anyway, I don't like when. I don't like the halftime shows when, when I don't like people standing and doing analysis. Sit down. Well, McAfee's behind a desk. Be behind the desk. I don't want to see you standing. It's awkward. Like, it doesn't look natural. Hold it. Hold a cocktail. Honestly, like, it's the only time people stand and talk.

[Danny Heifetz]

Sit on a couch and, and up your posture like you do.

[Greg Horbeck]

Like, humans rarely just stand in a group and talk to one another. Something at a. You're at a standing table. You have a drink in your hand.

[Danny Heifetz]

I actually have a take on this.

[Greg Horbeck]

I think they always give one guy a football because you gotta have. But, like, the other two are just, like, standing there. I don't like it.

[Danny Heifetz]

I think there's a reason for that, that you feel weird if you don't hold something. I think it's because we actually have not been on two feet long enough to not Feel weird about it. Like, I think that deep in our genetics, we still feel a little weird. We're not on all fours because it's kind of hot. You know what I mean? Well, no, it's kind of bizarre that.

[Danny Kelly]

We haven't been on two feet. We haven't been bipedal long enough.

[Danny Heifetz]

I guess it's a theory. I'm just saying, what other reason could there be that there's 8 billion people on earth and it seems one of the few things that unite us is no one really feels comfortable. So just standing upright with other people, like, you're like, I. I gotta hold. I gotta do something with my hands. Like, it's like, why it's so weird. We, like, have. Feel awkward. I'm telling you. Like, we just feel. Email us at ringer fantasy football gmail.com if you could.

[Danny Kelly]

This is how I feel, though. Like, I. I totally agree with you. Where. I know. I noticed this, I think on Thursday night games especially too, where they're about to go to a halftime show and they've got like, Richard Sherman and that whole Patrick. Yeah. Like, standing there on the field and like, R. Sherman is doing his thing.

[Greg Horbeck]

They're like rough housing.

[Danny Heifetz]

It's like, yeah. They insult upon themselves.

[Greg Horbeck]

Terrible. Terrible. I don't like it.

[Danny Kelly]

I keep putting myself in their shoes. I'm like, if they were telling me to, like, dance before, like, we're going to the commercial. I'm like, this is going to be.

[Greg Horbeck]

So behind a desk. Inside the NBA, they're at a desk. It's nice. It's. They're relaxed. They can have a drink and they're sitting there and it's comfortable there.

[Danny Heifetz]

You know what else is good about inside the. When Kenny goes into the board, they all make fun of him with walk. They're like, oh, standing in front of.

[Greg Horbeck]

The camera is awkward. Like, there's a reason why we don't do podcasts. Standing up and you see our whole body.

[Danny Heifetz]

This was safe. We should do it at all fours.

[Danny Kelly]

Okay.

[Greg Horbeck]

We should do it. You said that once or twice.

[Danny Kelly]

Discovery Channel.

[Danny Heifetz]

Good point. All right. Yep, Fair enough.

[Danny Kelly]

We should do it.

[Danny Heifetz]

That's a good quote card.

[Greg Horbeck]

That's not the first time he said that.

[Danny Heifetz]

I'm just saying, like, you know what I'm saying that we're. I think people feel awkward on two feet. I think we're not used to it yet. When do people start walking?

[Danny Kelly]

I.

[Greg Horbeck]

You go.

[Danny Kelly]

You making it about us millions of years ago.

[Danny Heifetz]

I have a lot of questions. I have a lot of questions.

[Greg Horbeck]

I Think it's a great take. I think it's a great take. I don't know if there's any. Any factual accuracy at all, but it's a good take.

[Danny Kelly]

It's the wildest take he's ever had.

[Danny Heifetz]

Can I give you. Can I give.

[Greg Horbeck]

We haven't. How long have we been watching? Talking?

[Danny Heifetz]

Can I.

[Greg Horbeck]

Two feet.

[Danny Heifetz]

Don't Google it.

[Greg Horbeck]

Don't go.

[Danny Heifetz]

Should that be a trivia question tomorrow? Or we just Google it now?

[Danny Kelly]

One small step for a man.

[Danny Heifetz]

Oh, just google it.

[Danny Kelly]

One giant leap.

[Danny Heifetz]

Emails. Other trivia questions about two feet or standing or whatever.

[Greg Horbeck]

Humans have been walking 1.8 to 1.5 million years ago. Does that sound right?

[Danny Kelly]

I mean, sure. I'm not going to fact check.

[Danny Heifetz]

So I have. I have another question about this. If we want to go into it. It. I don't know.

[Danny Kelly]

That was Gemini to the walking on two feet thing.

[Danny Heifetz]

Yes.

[Greg Horbeck]

Put it behind a desk.

[Danny Heifetz]

Jason, get a desk. Ben Lindberg, an extremely, like, brilliant person here at the Ringer, has a really. I don't know, just really good. One of those people is just pretty incredibly smart at a bunch of things. Wrote a really great piece during COVID like, early when there was, like, toilet paper shortages. And he wrote about having a bidet, and he had this throwaway line in this story that I thought about that I think about all the time. Time, which is just that. Basically, the fact that during COVID which is a pretty good test case for this, everyone immediately just bought toilet paper, suggests it's like data that suggests perhaps what we think of as the bottom of Maslow's hierarchy of needs of, like.

[Danny Kelly]

Food, shelter, wiping your shelter, water.

[Danny Heifetz]

And he's like, Ben Limmer's like, we kind of can prove it's a fourth thing that people like, what are your first four thoughts are? Food, shelter, water. What am I going to wipe my ass with? With, like, that's, like, clearly a foundational thought to which I. I think I. I just couldn't get that out of my mind. And then I'm like, okay, but when did we start wiping our asses? Like, when did that. How long have we been doing that? Like, have we been doing that for, like, 2 million years?

[Danny Kelly]

No, I would say. I would say.

[Danny Heifetz]

Is, is that related to standing up? And if so, how long after we started was there a gap? You know what I'm. You know what I'm saying?

[Danny Kelly]

Why would it be related to us standing up?

[Danny Heifetz]

Because the other animals. Other animals don't do it the way we do it. I assume we Lead. We lead the world an ass wipe.

[Danny Kelly]

The logic leap of the reason we wipe our ass is because we're standing up. I don't think makes sense.

[Danny Heifetz]

Aren't we the only two? No.

[Danny Kelly]

We wipe our asses because we're the only ones that are self aware and we don't wish want shitty ass.

[Greg Horbeck]

You ever seen a dog taking a. They make eye contact with you.

[Danny Kelly]

They're self aware.

[Danny Heifetz]

Dude, I was at a dog park the other day and this dog just lapped up this other dog and nobody noticed. And I was so.

[Danny Kelly]

I mean.

[Danny Heifetz]

Up by it.

[Greg Horbeck]

That's honestly the worst thing in the world. And you watch a dog eating.

[Danny Heifetz]

It was a giant and no one else saw. And this dog just lapped up every individual piece and just kept going.

[Greg Horbeck]

Don't you think humans started wiping our asses is because. Because it's. It smelled terrible when you were out and about with other people.

[Danny Heifetz]

But that's why I'm saying, like, when did this start?

[Greg Horbeck]

As soon as one person could communicate to the other. You smell like.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah, I'm sure it started at some point in like, you know, 3000 BC or 5000 BC or something like that.

[Danny Heifetz]

I feel like it was longer than that.

[Greg Horbeck]

5000 BC.

[Danny Heifetz]

Maybe that's why I asked. If that's not that long, no way it's gonna be. You're implying like the Egyptians didn't wipe their ass?

[Danny Kelly]

No.

[Greg Horbeck]

I would imagine it was a long, long time ago, but maybe I'm wrong.

[Danny Heifetz]

I feel like it's like.

[Danny Kelly]

I'm like maybe it's some. Some way. Yeah.

[Danny Heifetz]

Maybe we should do the. The millionth anniversary of ass wiping.

[Greg Horbeck]

Is there any way, like, do you think there's one person in the world who knows the answer to that?

[Danny Heifetz]

There has to be someone who's stopping this.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah, maybe aliens.

[Danny Heifetz]

Email us at your fancy football gmail dot com. Anyway, that was a long tangent. Well, there you go. There's all my thoughts on that.

[Danny Kelly]

That. All right. I'm glad I know all that now. Yep.

[Danny Heifetz]

Well, I. I'm just asking. I'm just asking questions here. I'm gonna do my own research. Lucille Bluth. I don't understand the stat line. I won't respond to it. Just want to shout out Trey Tucker for having three touchdowns to be the number one receiver on the day by a lot. It's hilarious. All garbage time. Most of it, yeah. New award. Two tight ends who outscored Kyle Pitts and Brock Bowers.

[Danny Kelly]

Oh, for sake.

[Greg Horbeck]

Come on.

[Danny Kelly]

On. Damn.

[Danny Heifetz]

Sorry.

[Greg Horbeck]

Look, for a team that scored zero points Kyle Pitts didn't have a terrible day for a zero point offense.

[Danny Kelly]

I'm really pro.

[Danny Heifetz]

Kyle Pitts now two tight ends to outscore Kyle Pitts and Brock Bowers. Mitchell Evans.

[Danny Kelly]

Okay.

[Danny Heifetz]

John Fitzpatrick.

[Greg Horbeck]

Yep, I remember that one.

[Danny Heifetz]

Jackson Hawes, Bills.

[Greg Horbeck]

Fitzpatrick is the. Is the Packers.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah.

[Greg Horbeck]

Jackson Haas is the Bills. Right. Mitchell Evans, he's on the.

[Danny Kelly]

He's on the Panthers. I think they.

[Greg Horbeck]

I think Haas caught a touchdown. Heid, here's the thing. Most of the time, Hive, it's goes, I was lying. They all scored more, so that's probably the answer. Is that one of the options we can now select?

[Ad/Promo Announcer]

Sure.

[Greg Horbeck]

I think it's Mitchell Evans because the.

[Danny Kelly]

Other two guys scored touchdowns, but yeah, it's Mitchell Evans. Hell yeah. Okay.

[Danny Heifetz]

Regardless, Jack's like, I'm just saying, like, John Fitzpatrick had never caught a pass today. I'm just saying he outscored Brock Barris. Never caught a pass in his life.

[Danny Kelly]

I hate that. Hate that.

[Danny Heifetz]

All right, that's not true. I'm wrong. He caught a pass also two weeks ago.

[Greg Horbeck]

Oh, good for him.

[Danny Kelly]

I forgot to.

[Danny Heifetz]

It's actually weird. Exactly. One catch, everybody. One target, one catch each of the last three years. Until this week.

[Greg Horbeck]

Burn book. I have a couple ideas. Can we. Can we list off? So week one, we did Jalen Waddle, and last week we did Mark Andrews.

[Danny Heifetz]

Yes.

[Greg Horbeck]

I would like to nominate a quarterback by the name of C.J. stroud, who is the quarterback 28 on the year right now, which is exactly where he was last year. He was the quarterback 28 last year. And I think C.J. stroud was going in the range of like, Justin Herbert, Jordan, love, even Trevor Lawrence, who has put up more points even though he's been bad. C.J. stroud was, like, in that category of like, he could be one of the guys, the pocket passers who pops. And he's been horrific, unstartable. There are guys you could have added off waivers who are better than him. Daniel Jones vs. C.J. stroud is not even a question anymore.

[Danny Kelly]

In fantasy football contact.

[Greg Horbeck]

I'm.

[Danny Kelly]

I'm adding guys in dynasty leagues off waivers and starting him over, which is like, for the record, does not have, like, there's nobody on the waiver wire in super dynasty.

[Danny Heifetz]

We're in a dynasty league. And Marcus Mariota was, like, super rostered. When Jay Daniels got hurt, like, he was already on a team. I don't.

[Danny Kelly]

I would. I'm, like, starting almost anybody over C.J. stroud at this point.

[Greg Horbeck]

I like, like Mac Jones versus C.J. stroud. Is not even really a question.

[Danny Kelly]

I literally did that today. Craig. In a super flex league that's.

[Danny Heifetz]

It's hard to beat.

[Danny Kelly]

I would say it worked.

[Danny Heifetz]

The other candidates. Travis Hunter is a candidate.

[Greg Horbeck]

Yep. I have him down. He's unstartable. You can't play him.

[Danny Heifetz]

The other. On that note of unstart, I mean Isaiah Pacheco is up there. I mean Isaiah Pacheco on the season I believe has. I'm doing this math off the dome and I always get it wrong. I think he is. No, no. It's been two weeks. Mark Andrews and against him he has 25 carries for I believe 97 yards this season.

[Greg Horbeck]

Yeah.

[Danny Heifetz]

On the year.

[Greg Horbeck]

He has 12 fantasy points. On the year.

[Danny Heifetz]

That's pretty bad because I think the.

[Greg Horbeck]

The Travis Hunter has 11.

[Danny Heifetz]

It's easier to say you won't play Stroud going forward because. But you paid less for Stroud. The difference is Travis Hunter, even if it's a weird situation, is a rookie receiver. And he still applies the thing we always say about rookie receivers, which is he gets better over the year. The burn, like in theory, the burn book is unplayable. Guys. The argument for Pacheco is.

[Greg Horbeck]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Danny Heifetz]

You might have taken him in the same round range, potentially higher than Hunter, depending on your league. And Pacheco genuinely seems like on. Like he hasn't had 50 yards. Like he's not getting the carries. Like the Chiefs don't want to run the ball.

[Greg Horbeck]

Like, yeah, he's borderline droppable. And it. It would pro. Like, you know, somebody's in the burn book. Burn book. When even if they had a good game next week, like let's say he had 50 yards and a touchdown, you're.

[Danny Kelly]

Still probably not playing him the next week.

[Danny Heifetz]

That's. Oh, I. What I thought you were going to say was burn book candidate. In truth is someone who, if you cut them, they might not even get a waiver claim.

[Greg Horbeck]

Yeah.

[Danny Heifetz]

Or if someone who does might cut them the next week. And it's like Travis Hunter is getting picked up for sure. C.J. stroud is not.

[Danny Kelly]

No.

[Danny Heifetz]

Pacheco's definitely the highest drafted player you could cut that might not get at it.

[Danny Kelly]

I would rather play Cream Hunt right now. Easily.

[Greg Horbeck]

Yeah, yeah, that's.

[Danny Heifetz]

So is it Pacheco or. I think we should burn Stroud, but Pacheco's on watch.

[Greg Horbeck]

Oh, I liked Pacheco. I like that argument. He's been so. I mean, the starting running back for the Chiefs is just unplayable.

[Danny Kelly]

I feel like I'm Having deja vu Because I'm pretty sure we talked about Pacheco for the burn book, but maybe we, maybe he didn't win or something.

[Danny Heifetz]

Let's do Pacheco then. How would you play if you're 1 and 3 in fantasy or you're 1 and 2 in fantasy? Can you. I, I can't. We can't tell you to play Pacheco anymore.

[Danny Kelly]

No. I'm sorry for recommending Pacheco by the way. Sorry.

[Danny Heifetz]

Now we put him in the burn book. He'll be good.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah, start him next week.

[Greg Horbeck]

Which means Mark Andrews, we put him in the burn book last week. They're playing tomorrow night.

[Danny Heifetz]

There you go.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah.

[Danny Heifetz]

Okay. Email us ringer fancy football gmail.com trivia questions. Any experts on the history of butts would be super helpful. Fantasy court, any arguments you guys have into the group chat or whatever about like just, you know, we'll be your fantasy representation or just, you know, settle that. So email us that and we're going to Dublin. So follow us on Instagram. Bring your fantasy football TikTok. Bring your fantasy football YouTube. We do just we're going to have a bunch of stuff from Dublin. It's going to be really fun and then yeah. Thank you dk. Thank you Craig. Thank you Carlos. Thank you Kai. Thank you Ronick. Thank you Austin. Thank you everybody. Thank you everyone for listening. Thank you Lord.

[Greg Horbeck]

Lord.

[Danny Kelly]

Thank you REO Speedwagon.

[Greg Horbeck]

Hell yeah.

[Danny Kelly]

Craig, Greg, are you a fan?

[Greg Horbeck]

I am a fan only because like I knew there two or their or three famous songs when I was growing up. Like my parents had like the a CD or something. Why am I blanking?

[Danny Kelly]

When you were growing up they had a cd. That just sounds crazy.

[Danny Heifetz]

Have we had this conversation before?

[Danny Kelly]

What? I just like my parents had records and like tapes so it's just funny that we are.

[Greg Horbeck]

Yeah, we're different ages.

[Danny Kelly]

I know. I'm just saying it's funny.

[Greg Horbeck]

Don't age me.

[Danny Kelly]

Shaming you because you're younger.

[Greg Horbeck]

CDs are, are worse than records. Records are cool. CDs are kind of.

[Danny Heifetz]

It's so true. I, I the way that the old you guys, the old look at their records and have such nostalgia.

[Greg Horbeck]

I'm like a cd.

[Danny Heifetz]

I don't think I'll feel that way about myself.

[Danny Kelly]

You can't have a nostalgic feel.

[Greg Horbeck]

No, because like there's a record player is like a, is like a cool piece of art. Art in your, in your living room. Oh, like my CD player.

[Danny Heifetz]

CD player is just put it in little Yeah. I also never even kind of understood how CDs worked.

[Danny Kelly]

I don't understand.

[Greg Horbeck]

I don't understand how vinyls work at all. Oh, no, I.

[Danny Heifetz]

No, wait, I learned it. So we talked about this a couple months ago.

[Greg Horbeck]

I mean, I know how it works. It's like the grooves in the thing and it creates sound vibrations or whatever.

[Danny Heifetz]

But wait. No, no, no.

[Danny Kelly]

It still makes no sense. Sense to me.

[Greg Horbeck]

No, I.

[Danny Heifetz]

It makes more sense to me now because someone emailed us a video of how a record works. I'm not going to pretend to get it, but it made more sense, which. The idea was basically, they take a. I forget the name of the device, but it's like a. One of them little needles that, like, can kind of measure sound. Like, picture a movie where they're doing the earthquake, whatever, like a sound thing, and they hook up one of those things and they play the song, and the thing, like, moves the needle and it's recording the sound vibrations, literally the vibrations, and then they, like, take that thing and they make a physical cast based on the needle and they somehow shape it. I still don't really get how you do that, but watching a video of it did go from like, black magic, I could never understand this. To. I guess I could see how someone put this together. I still am sometimes just in complete awe of how many things on your daily life people like, I could never have figured out in like, a thousand years that use every day.

[Danny Kelly]

But you could figure out how to do Stonehenge.

[Danny Heifetz]

That one. Yeah. I still maintain.

[Greg Horbeck]

I forgot about that. We were in New York arguing about that.

[Danny Heifetz]

I still.

[Danny Kelly]

Just to be clear, he could figure out how to make a stonehead.

[Danny Heifetz]

It was like, no. Oh, it was. If you gave me 40. It was. It was. How many guys did they get?

[Greg Horbeck]

I don't know, but it was you. You had the same materials they had. You had the same technological advancements they had.

[Danny Heifetz]

Had, yeah.

[Danny Kelly]

It took them. Like, how. How long did it take them?

[Greg Horbeck]

Oh, it was like.

[Danny Kelly]

Like thousands of years or something.

[Danny Heifetz]

But that's mostly dragging the rocks from, like, Morocco or something that bring them like, a thousand miles. Like, that sounds hard, but the idea was if they're. We have a pile. And it was like, if you gave me, like, 30 guys and we have the rest of our lives and this is the only thing we have to do. Food, Everything's provided for food, everything. We just got to build stone. It's. I feel like we could figure that out.

[Greg Horbeck]

I don't know.

[Danny Kelly]

No, I. I don't.

[Danny Heifetz]

It's all we gotta do, I'd be.

[Danny Kelly]

Like, this is really heavy. We should give up.

[Greg Horbeck]

Yeah, but if it was like.

[Danny Heifetz]

But you take a ditch and then you knock it over, and then like, you just. It's easy.

[Greg Horbeck]

If you were getting paid.

[Danny Heifetz]

Your sole.

[Greg Horbeck]

Job was to complete hench.

[Danny Heifetz]

If I have, like a. If I'm doing this, this job and then I got like, you know, I'm trying to, like, carve out an hour each day. No, I'm not going to figure out Stonehenge.

[Greg Horbeck]

I had a long argument once with my friends. This is not related at all. But like, you. You got paid to do this was my. Was the. Made me think of this. If LeBron James spent six months where his all his entire job, every waking moment he tried to be an Olympic javelin thrower, could he medal in the Olympics with six months of training?

[Danny Heifetz]

LeBron at 40 or LeBron at 25?

[Greg Horbeck]

We were making. It was. This was probably 10 years ago. So let's say LeBron at 30.

[Danny Heifetz]

Oh, it's.

[Greg Horbeck]

He is six months. And it's all he. He can hire the best trainers in the world. It's all he does every day. Could he meddle?

[Danny Heifetz]

I kind of think. Yeah, I thought so.

[Greg Horbeck]

I thought it was like, obviously, yeah.

[Danny Heifetz]

The, the pole vaulter guy's incredible. That guy's the best pole vaulter ever. And I realized he breaks the world record by a quarter of inch each time or an eighth of inch, because you get paid. Made ten grand every time you break the world record. So he could go like, 8 more inches, but he's gonna just do it in layers of, like, 24. But the javelin. How are the javelin? I feel like LeBron could do that.

[Danny Kelly]

Like, it's so disrespectful to javelin.

[Danny Heifetz]

Yeah.

[Danny Kelly]

Yes.

[Danny Heifetz]

It's kind of like when the flag football guy was like, I'm better than Mahomes, and we were like, maybe, but I don't want to watch you in the Olympics. I want to watch Patrick.

[Greg Horbeck]

So, DK, you don't think. You don't think LeBron could medal as a javelin thrower after six months of training?

[Danny Heifetz]

Wow.

[Greg Horbeck]

What are you guys in the prime of his life.

[Danny Kelly]

Why do you think that he's so gonna be so good at throwing a.

[Greg Horbeck]

Javelin just because he's LeBron James athletic person ever.

[Danny Heifetz]

I've seen him throw inbounds. You know who could. Jokic. Jokic. Jokic would win that. Jokic needs, like, a week. Like, I, I, I. We've never had this conversation on the show.

[Danny Kelly]

I don't think, think his full court passes are nuts.

[Danny Heifetz]

Watch every Nuggets game. Every other Nuggets game I watch, I think to myself, Jokic would probably be a top 20 quarterback.

[Danny Kelly]

He'd be.

[Danny Heifetz]

Yeah, in like two months.

[Danny Kelly]

He's just, he'd be making it rain out here.

[Greg Horbeck]

He's way too slow and big. He'd get destroyed in the pocket.

[Danny Heifetz]

Oh, like what, Rogers or Rothsberger?

[Danny Kelly]

16Th year.

[Greg Horbeck]

Jokic is like 610.

[Danny Heifetz]

Yeah, that so it's fine. He doesn't even know the place. He just needs to open, throw it.

[Greg Horbeck]

They would, they would have to really like build the offense around him. But he's, he's too big and slow. He would get his knees. He does host.

[Danny Kelly]

Can you imagine his, his throwing form? Just like the way he navigates the pocket he has.

[Danny Heifetz]

But here's the thing though. Think about how accurate his full court passes are. You know, much easier it is to throw a fucking football than a basketball.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah, I understand.

[Greg Horbeck]

I like, yeah, I get it.

[Danny Heifetz]

I, I just, I don't know. I think yeah has the best hand eye coordination. I, I, I don't know. It's unbelievable. It's the most accurate thrower.

[Greg Horbeck]

Do you think Jokic and LeBron could, could build Stonehenge though?

[Danny Heifetz]

But isn't this like, if I get them, I'll do it in like, I don't even need the decades. I'll do it.

[Greg Horbeck]

Give me a week.

[Danny Kelly]

This reminds me of like do you think Michael J. Jordan, the greatest basketball player of all time, if he spent six months training to play baseball, you think he could hit 200 make it past AA?

[Danny Heifetz]

Think he get 200?

[Danny Kelly]

Like how far did he make it?

[Danny Heifetz]

I don't love baseball. Birmingham markets maybe.

[Danny Kelly]

I don't, I don't know. I just think like these sports, when you're the elite athlete and like world class athlete, the technical skill it takes would take more than six months.

[Danny Heifetz]

So what do you guys think of an apple you are for the javelin?

[Danny Kelly]

I have no idea.

[Danny Heifetz]

I wish I'd say this is a trivia question, but I just looked at the answer.

[Greg Horbeck]

I, I don't.

[Danny Kelly]

Wait, what's the question?

[Greg Horbeck]

Can they throw it farther than a football field? That feels far.

[Danny Heifetz]

Current men's javelin world.

[Greg Horbeck]

I'm going to say 80 yards.

[Danny Kelly]

I'm going to say 150 yards.

[Danny Heifetz]

Craig, 98 meters. 320ft.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah.

[Greg Horbeck]

Okay.

[Danny Kelly]

Wow. That's pretty far actually. Yeah.

[Greg Horbeck]

LeBron could do that in a week.

[Danny Kelly]

A week?

[Greg Horbeck]

Six months, I think. Six months. He has a real show.

[Danny Heifetz]

I think what Craig's referring to is like, there's a certain primal thing about LeBron. You know, the beginning of Troy, the movie, where they just, like, they. They're like, let's not do this fight. Like, let's just send one guy out. One guy out. Like, let's just have them do it. I know that, like, we'd actually send a Navy seal, but, like, watching sports, just cosplay for war or whatever, and, like, I. You feel like you would send LeBron out as your.

[Danny Kelly]

He's our champion.

[Danny Heifetz]

He's our champion. Like, we'll. We'll. We'll live and die with what. You know what? That's. I think I want to see LeBron just fucking throw a spear.

[Danny Kelly]

All right. Yeah.

[Greg Horbeck]

Imagine we pay him every day for six months. That's all he has to do.

[Danny Heifetz]

I don't think we need to pay him.

[Greg Horbeck]

I'm just saying the whole point is that, like, it's his only goal.

[Danny Heifetz]

Yeah.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah. What, do you think that there'd be other sports that he'd be even better at at? I mean, like, in. In terms of, like, handball, the h. The hammer throw, or what not.

[Danny Heifetz]

You made so much fun of me for thinking that was the Olympic sport. I would try to make the team on.

[Danny Kelly]

You could not make the handball team.

[Danny Heifetz]

No, you could make any Olympic team. You made me have to pick.

[Greg Horbeck]

I would probably pick God no matter what. It'll sound incredibly arrogant and ignorant, so.

[Danny Heifetz]

Maybe I'll get out of your choice. Yeah, we couldn't make any of them, but, like, curling.

[Greg Horbeck]

Is that a reasonable choice?

[Danny Heifetz]

The curling people get mad when you say you can make the curling team.

[Greg Horbeck]

Well, yeah, all of them obviously could.

[Danny Kelly]

Didn't we have this talk about shooting a long time ago?

[Danny Heifetz]

Oh, yeah. Probably the hardest.

[Danny Kelly]

Like, takes aim with the Russian guy with his.

[Greg Horbeck]

Just hand in his pocket.

[Danny Kelly]

Yeah. Yeah. Wasn't he, like, Turkish or something? Yeah.

[Greg Horbeck]

Oh, is he not Russian?

[Danny Heifetz]

Turkish, yeah.

[Greg Horbeck]

Russia was in the Olympics, or were.

[Danny Heifetz]

They the Olympic Committee?

[Greg Horbeck]

All right.

[Danny Kelly]

Yes, of course.

[Greg Horbeck]

Yeah. Maybe shooting. Curling. Shooting while curling.

[Danny Heifetz]

Shooting while skiing.

[Danny Kelly]

Shooting pool.

[Greg Horbeck]

So it's called the biathlon.

[Danny Heifetz]

Yeah. Well, that was. That woman that just was, like, really rich, and she just, like, gamed her way into getting the Olympics. She really set the. That's the coolest path.

[Greg Horbeck]

Biathlon is fucking awesome.

[Danny Heifetz]

That's like. Can you. That's like. Can you just Revenant cosplay, you know?

[Greg Horbeck]

That's, like, so primal. It's like, ski through the woods and shoot things.

[Danny Heifetz]

Survive.

[Greg Horbeck]

Survive.

[Danny Heifetz]

We'll come back in four years. Whoever's not dead gets a gold medal.

[Greg Horbeck]

Season four of Squid Game is just going to be the biathlon.

[Danny Heifetz]

Yeah, that's pretty good.

[Danny Kelly]

It's like straight out of Wedding Crush. It's like, you know, the most dangerous game you hunting a human being. It's just like so ridiculous.

[Danny Heifetz]

Goodbye, everyone. Foreign must be 21 plus in present in select states for Kansas in affiliation with Kansas Star Casino or 18 + in present in D.C. kentucky or Wyoming. GAMBLING PROBLEM Call 1-800-GAMBLER or visit rg-help.com, call 1-888-789-7777 or visit ccpg.org chat in Connecticut or visit mdgamblinghelp.org in Maryland. Hope is here. Visit gamblinghelplinema.org or call 800-327-5050 for 24. 7 support in Massachusetts or call 1-877-8-HOPE NY or text Hopeny in New York.

[Ad/Promo Announcer]

This episode is brought to you by Warner Brothers Pictures. One Battle After Another is coming to theaters September 26th. Don't miss Legendary writer, director and producer my guy Paul Thomas Sanderson teaming up with Leo DiCaprio for the first time ever. Pretty exciting. They almost teamed together in Boogie Nights, actually alongside award winning actors like Sean Penn, Teyana Taylor and Benicio Del Toro in this hilarious action packed adventure following Bob Ferguson, an ex revolutionary, on a mission to find his missing daughter and overcome the consequences of his past. One Battle After Another only in theaters September 26th. Next get tickets now. Rated R. Under 17 not admitted without parenting.