The Rob Carson Show

Episode Title: The Seditious Six & the Case of the Armless Terrorists
Date: December 10, 2025
Host: Rob Carson (Newsmax Radio)
Special Guest: Doug Burns, former federal prosecutor

Episode Overview

This episode of The Rob Carson Show blends political analysis, satire, and spirited commentary, focusing on current controversies such as military readiness, so-called "seditious" members of Congress, narco-terrorist strikes at sea, and alleged fraud and corruption involving Somali-linked charities in Minnesota. Rob is joined mid-episode by former prosecutor Doug Burns for a deep dive into the legal and political dimensions of ongoing scandals. Throughout, the show stays true to Carson's comedic and critical style, peppered with parody songs and signature digs at political figures.

Main Topics & Discussion Breakdown

1. Show Opener & Comic Reflections

• [01:20] Rob Carson sets the tone, referencing his history of political comedy writing for Rush Limbaugh and the importance of satire in political commentary.
• Celebrates collaboration with parody artist Jim Gossett, urging listeners to support conservative comedy producers.
• [04:09] “It’s not easy to be a conservative content producer... Patreon.com/JimGossettcomedy.” (Rob Carson)

2. Military Policy, Transgender Ban & Judicial Controversy

• [04:09–06:21] Carson covers an appeals court decision supporting a military ban on transgender individuals with gender dysphoria, arguing it’s essential for combat readiness and unit cohesion.
  • “Basically, it’s saying you gotta be mentally and physically fit to be in the military.” (Rob Carson, 05:25)
  • Satirical jabs at the mental fitness of decision-makers and a mocking rundown of “woke” military planners.
• Comments on Trump’s Executive Order prioritizing military excellence and Pete Hegseth’s critique of judicial activism.

3. Philadelphia Teens, Crime & ‘Florida Justice’

• [06:35–07:44] Rob recounts a story of Philadelphia teenagers facing felony charges in Florida after robbing a Dick’s Sporting Goods during a youth football trip—contrasting Florida’s strict penalties with perceived leniency in Democrat-run cities like Philadelphia and LA.
• Features voice of Sheriff Grady Judd, praises Florida justice, and satirizes the difference from "home city" policies.
  • “You look at the thoroughbred, not the Somali team. Those are the inbreds.” (Rob Carson, 07:48)

4. Designation of CAIR & Muslim Brotherhood as Terrorist Orgs

• [08:07–09:55] Applauds Florida and Texas for designating CAIR and the Muslim Brotherhood as foreign terrorist organizations, criticizing their supposed agendas.
  • “The move bans the organizations from buying or acquiring land in Texas... Sharia law bullcrap. I told you!” (Rob Carson, 09:13)
• Refers to his upcoming book “Homeboys, Hillbillies, and Hebrews—How We Came Together to Save America.”

5. The ‘Seditious Six’ & Elise Slotkin Video Controversy

• [13:28–17:08] Segment on “The Seditious Six”—lawmakers who called on the military to potentially reject presidential orders.

  • Rob criticizes Elise Slotkin and others for their supposed “psyop” video encouraging troops to resist Trump (“illegal orders” that weren’t specified).
  • [14:55] Satirical dissection of Slotkin’s public defense, accusing her of inciting division in the military:

    “You did, you were trying to cause a division in the military. This is just shy of Fort Sumter, this is what you’re after.” (Rob Carson, 15:01)

  • Mockingly reads excuses given for the video, calling them “bullcrap” and “CYA.”

• Parody Interlude

  • [17:08] Jim Gossett sings:

    “There’s no place like jail for Kelly to stay… Alyssa Slotkin should be there too…” (17:08–17:56)

6. Drug Boat Strikes & the ‘Armless Terrorists’

• [18:04–20:44] Debate over U.S. military strikes on narco-trafficking boats, Democrats’ outrage over lethal force, and the quip about “armless” terrorists killed in a recent operation.
  • [19:22] Mocking the demagoguery:

    “They had no arms. How could they signal—they had no arms! Surrender!” (Rob Carson)

• Criticizes Dems’ claims of “extrajudicial” killings and the hypocrisy of ignoring similar past actions under Democratic presidents.
• [22:22–22:45] “The Democrat Party—they love their illegal aliens... their narco terrorists. This is, this is Hakeem Jeffries answer…” (Rob Carson, 22:22)

7. Doug Burns Interview – Legal & Political Deep Dive

Guest: Doug Burns, former federal prosecutor

• [23:03–24:52] Burns contextualizes the political double standards concerning military strikes, emphasizing the hypocrisy in media and political outrage:

  • “When Obama did it, other presidents did it, nary a word was said... Now again, they die on the wrong hill.” (Doug Burns, 23:40)

• [27:09–29:45] Discussion of Somali-linked charity fraud in Minnesota; Burns calls for investigation but emphasizes need for facts, while Rob pushes for accountability of state and federal officials.
  • “People need to go to jail, Doug... Ilhan Omar... married her brother to get him into the country. Should that not disqualify her as a member of Congress?” (Rob Carson, 29:45)
  • Burns on claims Omar’s marriage to her brother was “undebunked.”
• [31:30–32:58] Jack Smith and Boasberg legal controversies: discussing subpoenas, grand jury processes, gag orders, and the nature of “without prejudice” legal dismissals.
• [33:57–35:40] FBI’s handling of January 6th pipe bomb suspect—Burns and Carson imply a lack of action because the suspect did not fit the “white supremacy” narrative. Tapper’s mislabeling as an example.
  • “If that person had been Caucasian, he would have been arrested so fast her head would be spinning.” (Burns, 35:16)
• [36:13–36:17] Both exchange Christmas greetings amidst mild satire of political correctness.

8. Parody Songs, Satirical Riffs, and Closer

• [38:41–39:21] Jim Gossett’s parody “Have a Holly Somali Christmas” riffing on Somali charity fraud, with pointed lyrics about political figures and alleged scams.
• [39:27–40:43] Brief on Marjorie Taylor Greene:
  • “She’s like a Thanksgiving turkey... she is done.” (Rob Carson, 40:43)
• Carson closes the show celebrating American pride, resisting “anti-Christmas” narratives, and emphasizing support for Trump and traditional values.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On The Seditious Six Video:

  “You were trying to cause a division in the military. This is just shy of Fort Sumter.” (Rob Carson, 15:01)

• On Double Standards for Military Strikes:

  "When Obama did it, other presidents did it, nary a word was said... The sanctimony is just unbelievable." (Doug Burns, 23:40)

• On Somali Charity Fraud:

  "How... can a governor or a mayor not realize there's fraud when a charity jumps from 2.6 million to 250 million in one year?" (Rob Carson, 27:47)

• On Parody’s Role:

  “Gossett does two a day—he’s a frickin' genius… It’s not easy to be a conservative content producer.” (Rob Carson, 04:09)

• Parody Song Lyric:

  “There’s no place like jail for Kelly to stay… Alyssa Slotkin should be there too.” (Jim Gossett, 17:08) “Have a Holly Somali Christmas... millions you can steal.” (Jim Gossett, 38:41)

• Holiday & American Pride Closer:

  “Christmas is back. Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas. Happy Hanukkah. And America’s back... If you want to come here, you better be proud to be an American. Otherwise, GTFO.” (Rob Carson, 38:21)

Key Timestamps

• [01:20] Show kicks off, Rob explains comedic philosophy.
• [04:09] Discussion of transgender ban in the military.
• [06:35] Philly teens meet "Florida justice".
• [08:07] Announcement: CAIR and Muslim Brotherhood terrorist designation.
• [13:28] Elise Slotkin & The Seditious Six controversy.
• [17:08] Parody: “There’s No Place Like Jail”.
• [18:04] Drug boat strikes—“armless terrorists” controversy.
• [23:03] Doug Burns joins, analysis of legal hypocrisy.
• [27:09] Deep dive into Minnesota Somali charity scandal.
• [31:52] Jack Smith, Judge Boasberg, and recent legal cases.
• [35:16] FBI, January 6th, and media narrative.
• [38:41] Parody: “Have a Holly Somali Christmas.”
• [40:43] Marjorie Taylor Greene discussion.
• [41:16] Show wraps up, Christmas/American pride message.

Tone & Style

Rob Carson’s style is brash, comedic, and highly opinionated, blending parody and righteous outrage with late-night humor. The episode features several musical parodies via Jim Gossett, frequent mockery of political opponents, and a through-line of conservative values, patriotism, and calls for accountability.

For Further Listening:
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