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The Russell Brunson Show
Interview With Collette On Our Family Culture (Part 2 of 3)
00:17:47
This is the second episode in an exciting series where you’ll get a chance to meet my wife Collette and her views on running an entrepreneurial family.
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- [00:00]
A
Hey everyone, it's Russell Brunson. Welcome back to the Marketing Secrets podcast. So I got to know, how was the first episode with my wife? Ah, I'm so nervous and excited to share her with you guys. She is such an amazing person who doesn't get any of the limelight or the spotlight. This is kind of first time she's had a chance to be out there. So I hope you guys enjoyed the first episode. If you haven't listened to it yet, go back and listen to episode number one. We cover three really fun questions and again, if you're liking these, please take a picture on your phone or wherever you're listening to it.
- [00:27]
B
Go.
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A
Go to Facebook or Instagram or wherever you do social stuff and post it and do Marketing Secrets and tag me because I'd love to see your thoughts and then comment in the comments of your post what you thought about episode number one, what you liked about it, what was meaningful for you, what helped. So let me know on that one and then do the same thing with this episode. So episode two, right now we're gonna jump into. We've got four questions we're gonna go through right now. So I'll tell you what the four questions are real quick and then we'll jump in. Question number four was, if you had to start over with what advice would you give your younger self, which is really good. Question number five, what does it mean to be a Brunson? What's your family culture like? Question number six, how does your family stay motivated during tough times? And how do you reset? And question number seven, what are some marriage and parenting systems that you are working that are working for you? So. Oh man. Excited for you guys to listen to the next episode again. Go. We're going to queue up the theme song. When we come back, I'll play the next segment of the interview. And again, if you're liking this, if you get any ideas or ahas, please take a screenshot on your phone, please post it and tag me and let me know what you guys liked about this episode with my beautiful wife, Colette. Alright, let's keep theme song and we'll be right back. So the big question is this. How are entrepreneurs like us who didn't cheat and take on venture capital, who are spending money from our own pockets? How do we market in a way that lets us get our products and our services and the things that we believe in out to the world and yet still remain profitable? That is the question and this podcast will give you the answers. My name is Russell Brunson. And welcome to Marketing Secrets.
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B
All right, question number four.
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C
Okay, if you had to start all over again, what would you do different this time? And what advice would you give your younger self?
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A
I know we don't mind.
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D
Yes.
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A
All right, so at the seven year mark, when we were struggling in our marriage and everything, and we tried traditional counseling, but I think the biggest impact for both of us was going to Tony Robbins. Like, I went to UBW first walked on fire. I came home, I was like, crazy. And it's funny, we're both in the same state when I left. But then Tony gets you up to here. I came home and I was like, oh, you're really depressed. You should go. So she went and she came on fire. We're like, ah. Like, everything was. Everything was awesome. And I remember then we went to Date with Destiny after we did like that year. We did like everything. Tony had forgotten Tony, like the whole year, basically. But we went to, to a date with Destiny. And I remember Tony talked about the six human needs and all kinds of stuff. And he talked about why we do what we do. What need are we trying to get met. And it was interesting. It helps you figure out what's your primary needs. For me, my primary need, this primary desire I have is love and connection. I'm looking for love and connection. In my head though, I was like, I need to go get significance so my wife will love me and connect with me. So I'm going out here trying to, you know, take over the world and like, you know, make a million, you know, all this kind of stuff. And like, thinking like, me being significant would make her love me more. So I went through this indirect pattern to try to get love and connection. Like, that was the whole thing. And I remember one day we did a launch into like a million dollars. I came home and I was like, you know, conquer, like we need a million dollars. And she was like, I just wish you'd come home. And I remember like Debbie Downer. I'm like, but I just conquered this thing. And I had that realization, Dave, Destiny is like, she loves me already. We already have connection. Like, I don't have to go prove anything. It's like I'm going through this huge long path to get the thing that's just right here. And like, that was my big thing. And I think, I don't know if it's just me, but I think a lot of entrepreneurs that we do it initially because we need the significance. Like, we're looking for that because we Want love and connection with our spouse or our parents or whoever is we're trying to impress. I think if I was to start over again, like I would. I would like take things slower and just. And just. I don't know. I think that there was a period in our life as I was building where I was checked out and I was doing the thing and that drove us apart as opposed to like not being so obsessed with like the end goal and just slowing down and truly, I don't know. You know, I think it's in the launch clickfunnel. Same thing. Like me and Todd had a disconnect from everything to be able to like get this thing off the ground bank now it's a lot better spot where now it's fun. We're traveling together. We're doing a bunch of fun things. And she came to this mastermind Puerto Rico and just more things together. I would have slowed down, I think and done more of that from the very beginning as opposed to think I had to go leave to go get significance to come back and slay the beast and come back and like here it is. I would have been more like, hey, let's go get this thing together.
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B
It's funny because she already loved you when you were selling potato guns making 20 bucks a day, right?
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D
Yes.
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B
But we forget that. Like I like, I feel like I'm in counseling right now because I think.
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D
I'm doing that right now.
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B
I think I'm doing that right now. Okay. This isn't about me. This is about you. That's good. Anything else you want to add or do you want to go to question five?
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D
No, I think that's pretty good. I wish I could go back and be.
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B
Let's talk about what it means to be a Brunson. Like your kids perspective. You know, for us, we're obsessed with this stuff. We have our own family logo on. We have these shirts we had made custom. Do hard things is one of the things we tell our kids.
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A
Right.
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B
Like all kinds of stuff. And I know that Russell thinks that's really cool because he's like geeking out when we talked about it a couple times. But tell us what's unique about your family culture.
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A
First of all, I want to do all the cool stuff you guys are doing. Yeah, they have so many cool things they're doing. Anyway. I. I think a couple things that really. I think I watched Club bring the table. It's really fun. Is especially after like after Tony Robbins, we realized that like every morning our poor kids wake up, and they're about to go to the evilest place on earth. We call it school. And they're already tired. And it's like they wake up and it's like, you know, like, I remember waking up as a kid hating waking up and hating going to school. And, like, you're miserable till school's over. And what Klect's really good at is, like, getting the kids excited in the morning. It's like she turned music on and she'll be goofy and dance with them. Like, doing stuff to get them so that, like, waking the morning is not this horrible thing, like, trying to get. Get them to crack a smile. And like, times the kids were little us, like Dan, like, picking up and dancing around the whole house with them and, like, just trying to get them to, like, not be miserable, you know, in a good state so they can go and conquer school or conquer the difficult things.
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D
Is.
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A
Is one of my favorite things I watch Colette do all the time. What other cool things? We always tell them that Brunson. Because all the kids don't want to wrestle ever. So mine is like, Brunson's wrestle. We do hard things. Yeah, That's a big one.
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B
Do you use NLP on your kids to make them become wrestlers?
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A
Wrestle. What's that?
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B
You use NLP on your own kids to get them to be wrestling.
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A
I don't think that stuff works on your wife or kids. It's really weird. It works on everybody else.
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D
So stubborn.
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C
What's wrong with it?
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B
Yeah, when Ashley drops off the kids at school.
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C
Oh, gosh.
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D
Don't say this.
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B
Just tell them all this stuff. It's their device.
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D
Oh, gosh.
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C
We pray. That's, like, one thing we do. But we make the prayer a little bit more fun. So a little more fun at the end. I say in all my people said. And they'd be like, amen. If they don't yell amen loud enough.
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B
It doesn't count.
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C
Doesn't count. We gotta pray again. And we just sit in line.
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B
And then you roll down your window and say, I love you. Way too loud to embarrass.
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C
And I do this other thing too that they like, and I go bring them out.
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B
Bring them out.
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C
And I'm like, she weighs. She's 3 foot tall and 39 pounds, and she likes to party. Finley Saladimer. And I do that for all my kids.
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A
That's so cool. I love it.
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C
They don't think it's cool.
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B
Some of them do. Don't think it's cool until like, fourth grade.
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A
Fourth grade.
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B
Embarrassing. Yeah. They just own it. They're like, yeah, mom, you're the best mom.
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C
My sixth grader just puts his hood on and walks to school.
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D
Well, I'm curious because Russell takes the kids to school certain days. Same thing in the funnel. Hacker G with music pumping and whatever else. Lights flashing, I don't even know. And breaking the rules, going up the wrong way, dropping off the kids anyway. But I'm like, I asked the kids that. They love it. And so I'm like, and those are the middle schoolers.
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A
So I'm like, you like that as Jeep.
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D
And I feel like the lame O. And I'm like, get in the mommobile. Let's go.
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C
Oh, one time I tried to download that song, Bring them out, bring them out. And then I downloaded it, and I didn't listen to it before. I played it, like, totally inappropriate in my mind. I just thought it was just the Bring them out, bring them up.
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D
Nope.
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A
There's two versions. The radio version.
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C
So you just have to do it yourself.
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A
One of the things you were talking. I thought about that we did about a year ago. It's really cool. Is after Charfen came to an event, he talked about setting family goals, and he talked about his business. Like, your business having, like, a Hall of fame goal, right? And then. And then you back do that. Like, okay, what's your super bowl goal? Like, the yearly goal. Then you have your weeklies, your monthlies. And so we did this not quite a year ago. We said, as a family, what's our Super Bowl? Or what's our hall of Fame goal? Like, like, someday, like, what do we want to be known for? What's the hall of Fame goal? And so what we set for that goal. So in the. In the Mormon Church, there's temples, and, like, the best thing to do is to get married inside the temple. It's where you're sealed for all time and eternity. And it's this really special. But to go to the temple, you have to be worthy, so you have to be living the commandments. You'd be doing stuff like that. And so. And so our family, like, the hall of Fame goals that we all want to. When Nora is old enough to get married in the temple, she's the baby. We all want to be worthy enough that we can be in the temple with her. So that's like, our. That happens. And yay, we were successful as parents. Yay, our family, you know, like, that's kind of the thing. And it might not happen, you know, who knows? But that's, like, so every night now. It's fun. They all pray, like, priest, bless. Will be worthy to be in the temple with Noah when she gets married. And that's, like. Like, a thing that we all strive for. And then we said, like, the super bowl goal. So what's the goal for the year now that's gonna get us closer to the Sunday hall of fame? So the goal we set was to be able to read the whole Book of Mormon as a family, which we've been trying to do that since they were born.
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D
Yeah, we finally did it 13 years later.
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A
Yes, we set the goal, though. And then. And then we said, you know, when you win the super bowl, they get to go somewhere crazy. They all go to Disneyland. They dump Gatorade on their heads. Like, what do you guys want when you. When you succeed? And we hit this goal. So they all wanted to go on a cruise with some of their Disney cruise with their friends. So we set it and set the goal, set the date, and they were so cool. There were times, like, when we'd be out on a date, and they're, like, texting us. Like, we just read two chapters and, like, you know, we're out of town and they're reading, and, like, they actually, like, set the goal and pushed it. And it was so cool to see them achieve the goal and then clad set up. So at Disney, when we were on the cruise, they came out and gave us awards and cake and all sorts of crazy stuff to celebrate well on Disney.
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C
Oh, I love that.
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B
That's awesome.
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A
Really good question number six.
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C
How does your family stay motivated or focused during tough times? And what does your family do to reset when things get out of sync?
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D
I say reset. We kind of like, I'm gonna start with the reset. I feel like, for instance, Russell was at his busiest Christmas break, all the things. But we ended up going to McCall, Idaho, which is a couple of hours out of town in a little cabin, disconnected. And it just reset. Like, everybody was playing board games. Everybody was together in this tiny little kitchen, which I love. Like, I don't know, this big home. People can just, like, scatter, and they're gone. I feel like you can eat dinner. They're gone. And so, like, we're stuck in a little thing, this cute little place, and we're tight together, doing the things. And so for a reset, I just love that going either on, even if you can't go for a couple of days, just a walk, or take it outside and just. Yeah, just to reset Reset.
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B
I just thought you guys built funnels. Family to reset.
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A
Funnel cakes. Funnel.
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C
I love that.
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B
I don't feel like you guys probably have. Or at least Russell seems like he's a here. He's a motivated guy. Right. So how do you stay motivated? You just kind of are that.
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A
Right?
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B
And then you guys. Tony Robbins and you're doing the dance parties in the morning. But that's really valuable, right? Resetting. Is there Internet at that cabin?
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D
There was WI Fi. I think they had a smart TV we didn't have.
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A
We had our phones, but that's all we had.
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B
We didn't have.
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D
Russell didn't even crack his computer open, which was. I've never seen that in a lot of years. So I. Reset was better for him then. Yeah.
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B
That is so hard. That is so hard. That is no joke. Okay, question number seven. This is a good one. And when I say system, I'm going to ask you what the most important marriage system and parenting system is. That's, you know, throughout your journey. System is. You probably. People don't say that phrase.
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A
Right.
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B
We're going to kind of bring that phrase out. But it's just the way that you do something.
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A
It's.
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B
Every family is already fully systemized. The question is, are those systems serving you well? Are they serving your kids well? Right. It's not. If you need systems, you already have them. The way you talk to yourself, the way that you take care of your body or don't. The way. So what do you think in terms of marriage systems and parenting systems? What are a couple really important ones that come to mind?
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A
We were in these questions ahead of time where like, that was like, huh, maybe we need to work on our systems.
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D
We're doing better than we think we are. I feel like we've never had, like, a really awesome system other than positive vibes.
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A
I think the big thing for us, too is that we go to church every Sunday. And then one thing that one of the Blue Star churches, we have a thing every week called family night. And so we're not perfect at it. I wish we were perfect at it. But family nights, we sit down and it's cool because it starts opening prayer and then, you know, usually there's spiritual thought. We try to calendar out, like, what's happening this week so we have some context of what's happening. And then we used to be better. These kids used to always make treats and stuff. We should probably get back to that. We had a family home, evening board, and they're always like, I get an opening song. I need to leave the music. I get to all this stuff when they were younger.
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D
All of us are growing up, so we're getting into the prickly teenager years.
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A
Where teenagers are hard. Do you guys have teenagers already?
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C
Yeah, he's 12.
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B
He's 12. Yeah, almost.
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C
Oh, and it's so hard. I'm like, this is a whole new avenue of life.
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A
Like, we got 2:13 and it's like one seems like he's like in a 15 year old body. One's like in a 9 year old body. So it's kind of like the old one's like, it's so hard. And they beat each other all the time. Like, how do you referee that? Do you let him fight it out? Do you?
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D
We're in the middle of craziness trying to figure it out, so. Suggestions, please?
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A
Anybody? You have a guest. Let's figure that part out. Let us know. We'll listen to that one and then we'll come back on a recap.
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B
Yeah, we're gonna find the answers. Like this whole project, we're not trying to be gurus at all. We're just, we want to do this. We want to be intentional with our family. And so, like, we're just going to facilitate and crowdsource system ideas, you know, and like deliver that to the tribe or whatever.
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A
And.
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C
And literally, I've been taking notes. Like, I'm just like, oh, my goodness. Like, as I've been learning from, like the entrepreneur part and then also the parenting part. And it's mind blowing.
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B
Yeah.
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C
Amazing.
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B
So with your kids, like, in regards to parenting or marriage systems, I know you guys do date night sometimes, but with Russell's schedule, it's probably next to impossible to have total consistency, I'm assuming. But what about with your kids? Is there any, like, little things you do, annual things? Is there like one thing? I'll give you one thing that I do that's really cool is we do Sawyer Sunday, Maverick Monday, Tucker Tuesday, Finley Friday. And it's not perfect at all.
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C
Judah May Thursday.
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B
I'll sit down and play Legos for 45 minutes and just be totally focused on that one kid at a time. That little thing is ridiculous. The impact it has on the kids. But that's like an example. Is there anything else you guys do as Brunson's? That's.
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A
I want to do that.
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D
See, I feel like individually we're not awesome. I feel like we're like. I mean, we go out and play and we play hard. Like, so Russell's outside playing with all the kids. But for individual. Like for instance, I am. I've done. I haven't done it in forever, but I pulled one of my kiddos out at lunch the other day and took him to lunch. He's like, mom, I really needed that. But of course, his love language is quality time. And.
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A
And we get all together and all fight. I think that's the big thing we gotta start doing. We always come up with cool names for our kids in the days of the week.
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D
Oh, no, I'm gonna come up with this and I'll share em later.
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A
Yeah. Would you like to see behind the scenes of what we're actually doing each day to grow our company? If so, then go subscribe to our free behind the scenes react reality TV show at www.funnelhacker TV.