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Ryan Leak
Welcome to the Ryan League podcast, where we keep everything short and sweet, my friends. I recently wrote a book called how to Work with Complicated People that hit the New York Times best sellers list. You can get your copy on Amazon if you haven't already. If you listened to it, read it and enjoyed it, leave your boy a review. That would be excellent. Five stars is preferred, but if it was only four stars, we do crave feedback and want to know how we can always get better. Now, in the process of talking about this book a lot, all over the country, one of the questions I've gotten along the journey is, what determines if a person is actually complicated or not? Like, what exactly makes a colleague, perhaps an in law, perhaps a friend, you name it. What makes these people complicated? And that indeed can be a tricky question because, well, complicated doesn't come in one flavor. Ain't that right? I mean, it's often a full buffet. Now, sure, we've all heard of Debbie Downer, but have you met Passive Aggressive Pete? Micromanager, Molly, Creepy Carlos, One Up Wanda, you know what I mean? Tmi, Tamiqua, Last minute Larry, come on. I'm making these up as we go. Like, if you've worked anywhere longer than two weeks, you have probably encountered one of these people. But in our study on working with complicated people, which you actually can check out the study@ryanleak.com complicated and we have our whole white paper on the study we did on this subject. And in the study, we actually sought out to find the answer to this question of what makes someone complicated or not, because, well, if we can answer that, well, maybe we can find some solutions. Now, in our research, we did discover that not all of what makes people complicated is fixable because some of it isn't just labeling someone quote, unquote wrong or someone being quote, unquote bad. Most responses entailed things that were just different. It was a lot of, it was a lot of human. In our research, that's what we discovered when we started talking to people about the people that they worked with that they deemed complicated. And so here's the exact question that we asked in our nationwide survey. What are the top three things that make someone complicated to work with? And the answers, well, let's just say they were eye opening. And I'll give you, let me give you the bottom of the list first. Number one on the bottom of the list, okay. Political views, 8%. Okay. Now, this survey was actually done at the beginning of 2024. So if I'm honest, I actually thought this number would be much higher. I actually thought politics would have been close to the top of the list. It was actually at the bottom. And I was pleasantly surprised. The next thing at the bottom of the list of what makes somebody else complicated to work with is culture. That was 9%. I actually thought this would be higher as many people talk about their culture as being toxic. But I was wrong here, too. Asian generation was 14%. Personal values was 14%. Job title role was 16%. So that's a whole lot of noise. That doesn't actually move the needle. But here's what came number one. Are you ready for this? The number one thing. And according to our research, that makes somebody complicated or not. And it was by landslide, by the way, 68% said it was attitude. Yep, attitude. Attitude was the number one factor that makes someone complicated or not. And that got me excited because here's the deal. I can't change your attitude. Yeah. Like, if you're a complicated person, I work with you, I can't change your attitude. But, but, but here's why I'm excited, because, well, I can change mine. And that's way more powerful than we give credit for. You can't control traffic. Okay. You can't control your co workers. You can't even control what your family says at the dinner table sometimes. But your attitude, that's yours. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That. That's your weapon, your attitude. Yeah. That's your thermostat, your attitude. Yeah. That's your anchor. And the crazy part is when you. When you own your attitude, it has a way of shifting the atmosphere for everyone else, too. What we learned about attitudes is attitudes are contagious. Whether it's a boardroom or living room, someone's energy is setting the tone. So why not let it be yours? Why not be the one who shows up with peace when everyone else is panicked? Why not be the person that shows up with optimism when everyone else is overwhelmed? Why not be the one person with belief when everyone else is burnt out? Why not be the one. Be the person that says, I am going to bring a positive attitude to every single environment that I step into. Here's the deal, my friends. You can't choose the season that you're in. We don't often get to choose our season, but we do get to choose our stance in that season. And your stance, your attitude might just give someone else the courage to change theirs. Every single morning before your feet hit the floor, you get to decide what kind of energy you are going to bring into that day. You do not have to wait for the group chat, the news, or your inbox to set the tone, because your attitude isn't a reaction, it's a decision. You can choose gratitude before the grind. You can choose peace before the pressure. You can choose purpose before problems. If you can win that battle within the first five minutes of your day, the rest of the day day has to respond. Why? Because you set your intentions at the beginning. And not only that, other people have to respond to it too. Your attitude is contagious. It is a domino effect of your day and you get to choose it. And I'm not just saying it because I'm a motivational speaker and a positive guy. No, no, no. This is actually science. Yeah. The technical term is emotional contagion. In other words, what you feel spreads. Yeah. Whatever you feel, it's going to spread. So whether that's cynicism, whether that's hope, frustration, joy, whatever vibe you bring into the room doesn't just stay with you. It starts to infect the environment. So let me leave this with you. Today, you will not fix every complicated person you work with, but you can decide the kind of energy you're going to bring to the person you work with. You can lead with empathy. You can choose to stay grounded. You can bring a better attitude to every environment you step into. Whether we are talking about a boardroom, a living room, a locker room, wherever you go today, you can bring a better attitude. And when you do, you make everywhere you go just a little less complicated. My friends. That's all we got for today, folks. Thank you so much for listening to the Ryan Leak podcast. If today's episode inspired you and is going to help you deal with Debbie Downer and Passive Aggressive Pete and Micromanager Molly or Creepy Carlos or One Up Wanda or Last Minute Larry. If today's episode added value to your life, I want you to share with a friend. I want you to take a moment to rate, review and subscribe it. I also send out an encouraging text every single week. If you'd like to subscribe to that text podcast, 469-809-1201. Again, that's podcast at 469-809-1201 and you'll start getting some encouraging text messages from me at the beginning of the week. Your support helps us reach even more people with these short and sweet nuggets of inspiration. Thank you so much for being a part of the journey and and I'll see you next time.