
Hosted by Shantel Rousseau · EN

There's a question that comes up every time someone mentions an ex at dinner: "Where is he now?" And what that question is really doing is asking you to justify whether the relationship was worth having based on how it ended. If there's no ring, no forever, no clean resolution then the whole thing gets filed under wasted time.This episode is a direct challenge to that framing. Shantel breaks down why measuring a relationship by its outcome is not just unhelpful, it actively strips you of your own power. A relationship that ended is not evidence of failure. Presence, growth, vulnerability, and the version of yourself you became inside that chapter (!!!) none of that disappears because someone left.This one covers the narrative most women inherit without questioning, what it actually means to take sovereignty over your own relationship history, the difference between accountability and self-blame, and why grieving a relationship is not the same as admitting you wasted time.If you've ever described a past relationship as a waste, or felt embarrassed about how long you stayed, or quietly wondered whether your past counts, this episode is for you.--want to book a girl chat session? all the info is here - https://squ.re/45jq3ue want to partner w/The Sage Sorority Podcast? let’s chat - thesagesorority@gmail.com have a question? send in an (anonymous) one for Q&A - https://tellonym.me/thesagesorority 💘 SUBSTACK// https://open.substack.com/pub/thesagesorority INSTAGRAM// https://www.instagram.com/thesagesorority/TIKTOK// https://www.tiktok.com/@thesagesororityYOUTUBE// https://www.youtube.com/@TheSageSorority subscribe to The Sage Sorority Podcast + leave a (cheeky) 5* rating 💘apple: https://bit.ly/41ZNwO2spotify: https://spoti.fi/4iVPAhnyoutube: http://bit.ly/45ei8wO THE SAGE SORORITY PODCAST - https://feeds.captivate.fm/thesagesorority/ 💘catch up with, our founder + host, Shantel instagram// https://www.instagram.com/shantelrousseau/ tiktok// https://www.tiktok.com/@shantelrousseauSnapchat// https://snapchat.com/t/fb8LTRCm youtube// https://www.youtube.com/@shantelrousseauonline OUTFITS - ShopMy// https://shopmy.us/shantelrousseauOUTFITS - LTK// https://www.shopltk.com/explore/shantelrousseau💘

In this episode of The Sage Sorority, Shantel explores what it means for women to “misbehave with integrity,” inspired by Clarissa Pinkola Estés’ The Late Bloomer.This episode is about good girl conditioning, people-pleasing, self-trust, over-functioning, emotional labour, and the quiet resentment that builds when women keep choosing propriety over honesty.Shantel unpacks the difference between being proper and being ethical, why women often delay decisions they’ve already made, and why acting without cruelty, manipulation, or deliberate harm may be the permission you’ve been waiting for.Topics include: Good girl conditioning, People-pleasing and resentmentSelf-trust and decision-making, Emotional labour in relationshipsOver-functioning in friendships, family, work, and datingWhy “I should” keeps women stuck, Becoming less likeable but more honestReferenced in this episode:The Late Bloomer by Clarissa Pinkola EstésWomen Who Run With the Wolves by Clarissa Pinkola EstésEpisode 012: Big Energy, No ApologyEpisode 027: The Rules Are Made UpEpisode 038: The Rebrand EraIf this episode resonated, share it with a friend and subscribe to The Sage Sorority on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and YouTube.--want to book a girl chat session? all the info is here - https://squ.re/45jq3uewant to partner w/The Sage Sorority Podcast? let’s chat - thesagesorority@gmail.comhave a question? send in an (anonymous) one for Q&A - https://tellonym.me/thesagesorority💘SUBSTACK// https://open.substack.com/pub/thesagesororityINSTAGRAM// https://www.instagram.com/thesagesorority/TIKTOK// https://www.tiktok.com/@thesagesororityYOUTUBE// https://www.youtube.com/@TheSageSororitysubscribe to The Sage Sorority Podcast + leave a (cheeky) 5* rating 💘apple: https://bit.ly/41ZNwO2spotify: https://spoti.fi/4iVPAhnyoutube: http://bit.ly/45ei8wO

In this episode of The Sage Sorority, Shantel breaks down how to choose your core values and actually live by them, drawing on the values clarification work used in therapy and coaching. You'll learn the difference between values, goals, preferences, and aesthetics, why your real values are revealed by your trade-offs, and how to use a six-to-eight value framework as a practical filter for decisions in friendship, dating, work, money, and creativity. If you've ever felt the gap between who you say you are and what your choices keep revealing, this is the episode that helps you name what matters and build from there.LIST OF VALUES 1 - https://brenebrown.com/resources/dare-to-lead-list-of-values/LIST OF VALUES 2 (also some great exercises in this one!) - https://taproot.com/live-your-core-values-exercise-to-increase-your-success/want to book a girl chat session? all the info is here - https://squ.re/45jq3uewant to partner w/The Sage Sorority Podcast? let’s chat - thesagesorority@gmail.comhave a question? send in an (anonymous) one for Q&A - https://tellonym.me/thesagesorority💘SUBSTACK// https://open.substack.com/pub/thesagesororityINSTAGRAM// https://www.instagram.com/thesagesorority/TIKTOK// https://www.tiktok.com/@thesagesororityYOUTUBE// https://www.youtube.com/@TheSageSororitysubscribe to The Sage Sorority Podcast + leave a (cheeky) 5* rating 💘apple: https://bit.ly/41ZNwO2spotify: https://spoti.fi/4iVPAhnyoutube: http://bit.ly/45ei8wO💘catch up with, our founder + host, Shantelinstagram// https://www.instagram.com/shantelrousseau/tiktok// https://www.tiktok.com/@shantelrousseauSnapchat// https://snapchat.com/t/fb8LTRCmyoutube// https://www.youtube.com/@shantelrousseauonlineOUTFITS - ShopMy// https://shopmy.us/shantelrousseauOUTFITS - LTK// https://www.shopltk.com/explore/shantelrousseau💘

Three episodes. Three completely different topics. And the whole time I kept thinking: why does this all feel like the same conversation?Belle Burden knew before she signed that prenup. Most of us know long before we end a friendship. And Emma Grede? She's getting dragged online for simply trusting herself out loud. Today I'm naming the one thing that connects all three, and why it matters more than any of us want to admit.We're talking about what happens in the gap between knowing something and actually trusting it. Why that gap is costing women more than they realise. And why a woman who has closed that gap completely, like Emma, makes so many people deeply uncomfortable.If you've been listening all month, this is where it all lands. If you're new here, welcome. You found a good one.--want to book a coaching session? all the info is here - https://squ.re/45jq3uewant to partner w/The Sage Sorority Podcast? let’s chat - thesagesorority@gmail.comhave a question? send in an (anonymous) one for Q&A - https://tellonym.me/thesagesorority 💘SUBSTACK// https://open.substack.com/pub/thesagesororityINSTAGRAM// https://www.instagram.com/thesagesorority/TIKTOK// https://www.tiktok.com/@thesagesororityYOUTUBE// https://www.youtube.com/@TheSageSororitysubscribe to The Sage Sorority Podcast + leave a (cheeky) 5* rating 💘apple: https://bit.ly/41ZNwO2spotify: https://spoti.fi/4iVPAhnyoutube: http://bit.ly/45ei8wO 💘catch up with, our founder + host, Shantelinstagram// https://www.instagram.com/shantelrousseau/tiktok// https://www.tiktok.com/@shantelrousseauSnapchat// https://snapchat.com/t/fb8LTRCmyoutube// https://www.youtube.com/@shantelrousseauonlineOUTFITS - ShopMy// https://shopmy.us/shantelrousseauOUTFITS - LTK// https://www.shopltk.com/explore/shantelrousseau💘

The internet has had a lot to say about Emma Greed's new book Start With Yourself this week, and most of it is from people who haven't read it. In this episode, Shantel breaks down what the discourse is actually about, why it keeps happening, and what we're all missing when we rush to poke holes instead of engage.Shantel introduces the concept of the disclaimer economy — what happens when women are expected to pre-account for every possible objection before anyone will engage with their actual idea — and maps it across three areas where it shows up most loudly: motherhood, careers, and major life decisions.This episode covers the three-hour mom discourse, the work from home debate, what the contrast between Emma Greed and Belle Burden's Strangers actually tells us about how women approach partnership, and why clarity is not a hostile act.If you've been online this week, you've seen the takes. This is the longer, more honest conversation.--want to book a coaching session? all the info is here - https://squ.re/45jq3ue want to partner w/The Sage Sorority Podcast? let’s chat - thesagesorority@gmail.com have a question? send in an (anonymous) one for Q&A - https://tellonym.me/thesagesorority 💘 SUBSTACK// https://open.substack.com/pub/thesagesorority INSTAGRAM// https://www.instagram.com/thesagesorority/TIKTOK// https://www.tiktok.com/@thesagesororityYOUTUBE// https://www.youtube.com/@TheSageSorority subscribe to The Sage Sorority Podcast + leave a (cheeky) 5* rating 💘apple: https://bit.ly/41ZNwO2spotify: https://spoti.fi/4iVPAhnyoutube: http://bit.ly/45ei8wO THE SAGE SORORITY PODCAST - https://feeds.captivate.fm/thesagesorority/ 💘catch up with, our founder + host, Shantel instagram// https://www.instagram.com/shantelrousseau/ tiktok// https://www.tiktok.com/@shantelrousseauSnapchat// https://snapchat.com/t/fb8LTRCm youtube// https://www.youtube.com/@shantelrousseauonline OUTFITS - ShopMy// https://shopmy.us/shantelrousseauOUTFITS - LTK// https://www.shopltk.com/explore/shantelrousseau💘———

We've been building toward this one, sages!The Sisterhood Chronicles started with a question: why do female friendships matter so much? We've audited them, we've talked about making new ones, we've named the fatigue of showing up for people who don't show up back. And now we're here, the conversation that somehow nobody gives us language for: how do you actually end a friendship? And how do you do it without losing yourself, burning everything down, or carrying the guilt of it for years afterward?want to book a coaching session? all the info is here - https://squ.re/45jq3uewant to partner w/The Sage Sorority Podcast? let’s chat - thesagesorority@gmail.comhave a question? send in an (anonymous) one for Q&A - https://tellonym.me/thesagesorority💘SUBSTACK// https://open.substack.com/pub/thesagesororityINSTAGRAM// https://www.instagram.com/thesagesorority/TIKTOK// https://www.tiktok.com/@thesagesororityYOUTUBE// https://www.youtube.com/@TheSageSororityIn part six of the Sisterhood Chronicles, Shantel breaks down the three distinct ways friendships tend to end (the natural drift, the incident that changed everything, and the friendship that has simply run its course) and why each one requires something different of you. She also gets into why we spend so long looping through the "am I being too much / not enough?" checklist before we let anything go, and what it actually means to close something cleanly, with your dignity and theirs intact.This episode also touches on Who Needs Friends by Andrew McCarthy and what a chance encounter in a diner said about how differently men and women are socialised to understand the weight of friendship from the very beginning.This is a heavy one, in the best way. If you've ever been on either side of a friendship ending, this one is for you.In this episode: The three types of friendship endings and how to handle each one. Why we don't have cultural language for friendship breakups the way we do for romantic ones. The difference between giving grace and using it as a stall. When a conversation is warranted and when it isn't. How to speak from the scar, not from the wound, and why that changes everything.Referenced in this episode: episode 006, 025 + 044 + TSS's substack (linked here)If this episode resonated, the best thing you can do is share it with someone who needs it. Screenshot it, send it in a DM, drop it in a WhatsApp thread.Podcasts don't have an algorithm the way social media does, so word of mouth is genuinely how the show grows. And if you haven't already, a 5-star review on Apple Podcasts or a comment on Spotify goes a very long way (!!)

episode 058 - strangers by belle burden: what everyone is missingWe are back. And for the first episode of the new season, I'm doing something a little different, a full opinion piece on one of the most talked-about books of 2026.Strangers: A Memoir of Marriage by Belle Burden is an instant New York Times bestseller, and with the Netflix adaptation just announced (Gwyneth Paltrow is set to play Belle), this book is about to get a whole second wave of attention. I listened to it on Audible, then bought the hardcover, and I have a lot of thoughts, including some that I haven't heard anyone else say yet.This is not a recap. This is my take.In this episode I get into why this book is being misread as a heartbreak memoir when it's actually a book about financial abuse and wilful self-erasure, why "James" deserves far more scrutiny than he's getting, what the prenup scene should teach every woman regardless of her relationship status, and why his family cutting Belle off after 20 years (!!!!) is one of the most important things in the entire book that nobody is talking about.I also get into the hot take I've been sitting on for years: a lot of women do not want to think for themselves, and this book is one of the clearest examples of what that costs.Strangers by Belle Burden is available on Audible, and in hardcover wherever books are sold. Highly recommend, especially if you're engaged, partnered, or thinking about either.Find me at @thesagesorority @shantelrousseau on Instagram and TikTok, and subscribe to The Sage Sorority on Substack for essays and exclusive content.The Gathering Vol. 2 is coming. Stay close.--want to book a coaching session? all the info is here - https://squ.re/45jq3uewant to partner w/The Sage Sorority Podcast? let’s chat - thesagesorority@gmail.comhave a question? send in an (anonymous) one for Q&A - https://tellonym.me/thesagesorority--💘catch up with, our founder + host, Shantel instagram// https://www.instagram.com/shantelrousseau/ tiktok// https://www.tiktok.com/@shantelrousseau snapchat// https://snapchat.com/t/fb8LTRCm youtube// https://www.youtube.com/@shantelrousseauonline OUTFITS - ShopMy// https://shopmy.us/shantelrousseau OUTFITS - LTK// https://www.shopltk.com/explore/shantelrousseau💘

while we’re on a short production break, i’m revisiting an episode that speaks to a very specific feeling... when your life looks fine on paper, but something internally feels slightly off.this is a conversation about that in between space and what it actually means to live with intention rather than just momentum.if you’ve been feeling disconnected, or like you’re drifting without fully understanding why, this episode will likely resonate. If this episode resonates and you’re drawn to navigating life a bit more deeply these days, I offer 1:1 coaching, https://squ.re/45jq3ue--want to partner w/The Sage Sorority Podcast? let’s chat - thesagesorority@gmail.comhave a question? send in an (anonymous) one for Q&A - https://tellonym.me/thesagesorority💘SUBSTACK// https://open.substack.com/pub/thesagesororityINSTAGRAM// https://www.instagram.com/thesagesorority/TIKTOK// https://www.tiktok.com/@thesagesororityYOUTUBE// https://www.youtube.com/@TheSageSororitysubscribe to The Sage Sorority Podcast + leave a (cheeky) 5* rating 💘youtube: http://bit.ly/45ei8wOspotify: https://spoti.fi/4iVPAhnapple: https://bit.ly/41ZNwO2THE SAGE SORORITY PODCAST - https://feeds.captivate.fm/thesagesorority/💘catch up with, our founder + host, Shantelinstagram// https://www.instagram.com/shantelrousseau/tiktok// https://www.tiktok.com/@shantelrousseauSnapchat// https://snapchat.com/t/fb8LTRCmyoutube// https://www.youtube.com/@shantelrousseauonlineOUTFITS - ShopMy// https://shopmy.us/shantelrousseauOUTFITS - LTK// https://www.shopltk.com/explore/shantelrousseau💘

while we’re on a short production break, i’m revisiting one of the more personal episodes from the archive.this is a reflection on the lessons that have actually shaped how i think, move, and make decisions in my 30s... not the polished version, but the real ones that come from experience.if you’re in a season of reflection, or questioning where you are and where you’re going, this is one to sit with. If this episode resonates and you’re drawn to navigating life a bit more deeply these days, I offer 1:1 coaching, https://squ.re/45jq3ue--Turning 30 is a milestone but it’s also a mirror. In this episode, I share 30 of the most important lessons I’ve learned since stepping into this decade. Some are personal, some are practical, and all of them are rooted in lived experience. Whether you’re 25 or 45, I hope these reflections give you something to carry into your own life.Highlights include:The truth about love, money, and friendshipWhy saying no is as powerful as saying yesThe underrated art of self-respectINSTAGRAM// https://www.instagram.com/thesagesorority/TIKTOK// https://www.tiktok.com/@thesagesororityYOUTUBE// https://www.youtube.com/@TheSageSororityCatch up with Shantel!Instagram// https://www.instagram.com/shantelrousseau/TikTok// https://www.tiktok.com/@shantelrousseauYouTube// https://www.youtube.com/@shantelrousseauonlineShopMy// https://shopmy.us/shantelrousseauLTK// https://www.shopltk.com/explore/shantelrousseauTIMESTAMPS00:00 Introduction and Audio Disclaimer00:24 30 Lessons in My 30s: An Overview01:48 Health and Fitness Lessons02:40 Lesson 1: Your Body is Your Only Home04:32 Lesson 2: Enjoyable Workouts05:44 Lesson 3: Intuitive Eating07:22 Lesson 4: Strength Over Thinness09:07 Lesson 5: Daily Movement09:53 Lesson 6: Health is Wealth10:13 Lesson 7: Daily Laughter11:38 Lessons on People and Relationships11:49 Lesson 8: Politics vs. Morals12:57 Lesson 9: Reject Scarcity Mindset15:00 Lesson 10: Friends Grow Differently16:07 Lesson 11: Let People Leave16:25 Lesson 12: Delivery Matters17:25 Lesson 13: Misery Loves Company18:15 Lesson 14: Read More19:55 Lesson 15: Avoid 'Should' Traps21:23 Lesson 16: Reevaluate Beliefs21:48 Lesson 17: Life's Unfairness22:38 Career and Money Lessons22:43 Lesson 18: Earning Potential23:06 Women Excel in Sales and Investing23:40 Earning Potential and Self-Worth24:05 Taking Risks and Entrepreneurship24:54 The Importance of Appearance25:42 Quiet Confidence Over Loud Boasting26:43 Regret of Inaction27:31 Indecision is Still a Decision28:28 Standing Alone for What's Right29:15 Value of Vintage30:43 Rising from Rock Bottom31:21 Building Momentum in Life33:56 Done is Better Than Perfect35:33 Pushing Through the Dip37:31 Do You Like Him or the Idea of Him?38:41 Men as Followers41:10 Final Thoughts and Reflections

While we’re on a short production break, I’m revisiting one of the most important conversations we’ve had on The Sage Sorority.If you’re new here, this is the episode I’d tell you to start with. And if you’ve been listening for a while, it’s one that tends to land differently depending on where you are in your life. If this episode resonates and you’re navigating friendship dynamics more deeply, I offer 1:1 coaching, https://squ.re/45jq3ue--The Sisterhood Chronicles (Pt.1): Why Female Friendships Are So Complex (and Beautiful)Welcome back, ladies! Friendship is one of the most defining relationships in a woman’s life, yet we rarely talk about it with honesty. In this first instalment of The Sisterhood Chronicles, I take a deep dive into the beauty, the mess, and the unspoken truths of adult female friendships. From loyalty and love to boundaries and shifting seasons, we’ll explore what makes these connections so powerful and sometimes, so difficult.Mentioned in this episode:Signs of friendship red flags and green flagsWhy friendship breakups can hit harder than romantic onesHow female friendship evolves in your 30sIf you enjoyed this episode, you’ll also love [Episode 023: Making New Friends] and [Episode 025: The Friendship Audit] for more real talk on the complexities of sisterhood.Share your thoughts with me on Instagram @theSageSorority and let's keep the conversation going! Have a beautiful week, ladies xx!TT's that I mentioned...https://vm.tiktok.com/ZNddxrsjY/https://vm.tiktok.com/ZNdd97wyd/--TIME STAMPS00:00 Welcome and Introduction00:33 The Complexity of Female Friendships02:34 The Importance of Female Friendships04:16 The Science Behind Female Friendships05:26 Authenticity in Female Friendships08:11 The Reciprocity in Friendships09:11 The Radical Significance of Female Friendships18:08 The Unrealistic Expectations of Romantic Partners25:55 Conclusion and Next Steps--INSTAGRAM// https://www.instagram.com/thesagesorority/TIKTOK// https://www.tiktok.com/@thesagesororityYOUTUBE// https://www.youtube.com/@TheSageSororityCatch up with Shantel!Instagram// https://www.instagram.com/shantelrousseau/TikTok// https://www.tiktok.com/@shantelrousseauYouTube// https://www.youtube.com/@shantelrousseauonlineShopMy// https://shopmy.us/shantelrousseauLTK// https://www.shopltk.com/explore/shantelrousseausubscribe to The Sage Sorority Podcast + leave a (cheeky) rating 💘youtube: http://bit.ly/45ei8wOspotify: https://spoti.fi/4iVPAhnapple: https://bit.ly/41ZNwO2