Podcast Summary: "I Hit Rock Bottom After Getting Red-Pilled" | The Sage Steele Show | EP 66
Episode Details:
- Title: I Hit Rock Bottom After Getting Red-Pilled
- Host: Sage Steele Productions
- Guest: Xavier Derusso
- Release Date: July 30, 2025
1. Introduction and Background
In Episode 66 of The Sage Steele Show, Sage Steele engages in a deep and personal conversation with Xavier Derusso, a 28-year-old political activist and influencer. Xavier's journey from being a BLM (Black Lives Matter) activist to a prominent figure within the MAGA (Make America Great Again) movement forms the crux of their discussion. Sage expresses profound emotions about Xavier's story, highlighting his vulnerability and strength in facing significant life challenges.
Notable Quote:
"I'm still a little choked up. A little knot in my stomach, some tears in my eyes still after this conversation with Xavier."
— Sage Steele [02:28]
2. Early Life and Identity Struggles
Xavier recounts his upbringing on the south side of Chicago and the subsequent move to Pontiac, Illinois, a predominantly white and conservative town. This relocation was a direct response to escalating crime and the family's desire to provide a safer environment for their children. As the youngest of three, Xavier faced significant identity challenges, feeling out of place both in Pontiac and Chicago.
Notable Quotes:
"I would spend my time in Pontiac where I felt like I was too black for the white kids. And then I would go up to Chicago and I was too white for the black kids."
— Xavier Derusso [05:06]
"I had to pick a struggle my entire life. And as I got older, I started feeling the need to find identity and purpose."
— Xavier Derusso [05:04]
3. Transition from Activism to Conservative Influence
Xavier’s involvement in activism began early, supporting BLM protests and advocating for the black community. However, his perspective began to shift during the tumultuous events of 2020. Initially applying to "The Circle," a Netflix reality show, Xavier was slated to portray a "woke white sorority girl." This experience catalyzed his disillusionment with certain progressive narratives, prompting him to critically analyze and eventually debunk PragerU videos that he previously supported.
Notable Quotes:
"I started going on this deep dive. And it started with I saw this video from Prager U that made me so irritated. I was like, you know what? I'm gonna start doing a whole deep dive on Prager U."
— Xavier Derusso [10:13]
"I realized that I had been researching for my own narrative rather than researching for the truth."
— Xavier Derusso [11:05]
4. Mental Health Struggles and Hospitalization
As Xavier distanced himself from his previous activism and faced backlash for his changing views, he experienced severe mental health challenges. The compounded stress led to a mental breakdown in December 2020, resulting in his hospitalization. During this period, Xavier confronted his vulnerabilities, ultimately finding the strength to seek help and rebuild his life.
Notable Quotes:
"I spent the week of Christmas in a psychiatric hospital because I wanted to end my life."
— Xavier Derusso [58:09]
"When I started making content in February of 2021, that was my healing journey."
— Xavier Derusso [62:30]
5. Rebuilding Family Relationships
Post-recovery, Xavier focused on mending strained familial relationships. Significant improvements were made with his father, culminating in meaningful interactions and mutual pride in Xavier's achievements. However, ties with other family members remain strained due to ideological differences.
Notable Quotes:
"We had such a great time. I really, really enjoyed just getting to catch up with them because for years I kind of just like stayed away a bit because I didn't know how my niece and my nephews would react to me."
— Xavier Derusso [45:14]
"He’s proud of me. And we didn't go super deep into politics."
— Xavier Derusso [48:14]
6. Professional Journey with PragerU
Joining PragerU marked a pivotal turn in Xavier's career. He contributed to creating educational content aimed at empowering the next generation with common sense and critical thinking. Xavier initiated projects such as "Guess or Mess," a children's show designed to engage young audiences in learning through interactive challenges.
Notable Quotes:
"Working at Prager U, which was a fight to get in the door. A lot of people think that because of my backstory, they just hired me. Oh, no. I had to earn that."
— Xavier Derusso [72:16]
"My very first video...I started listing off, like 30 things that are more relevant to the black community today."
— Xavier Derusso [71:06]
7. Views on BLM Movement and Systemic Disempowerment
Xavier articulates a critical perspective on the evolution of the BLM movement, asserting that systemic racism has transitioned into systemic disempowerment. He contends that instead of fostering empowerment, certain progressive initiatives may inadvertently perpetuate dependency and diminish accountability within the black community.
Notable Quotes:
"Systemic racism turned into systemic disempowerment, where they go out of their way to reward us and coddle us for our toxic behaviors."
— Xavier Derusso [30:27]
"Everything that is just pro-anarchy and lacks foundation. Like, they are very good at just inserting it into every little sector."
— Xavier Derusso [25:15]
8. Influence and Impact on Audience
Xavier emphasizes the importance of authentic content creation and the role of influencers in shaping public opinion. His experiences highlight the challenges conservative voices face in media-dominated spaces, yet he celebrates the positive feedback and personal connections he fosters through his work.
Notable Quotes:
"I've had people reaching out to me saying that they were going to talk to their doctor about the possibility of lessening their dosage."
— Xavier Derusso [53:29]
"I don't care about the following number. I don't care about anything. I want to feel like I made an impact."
— Xavier Derusso [53:55]
9. Final Reflections and Future Goals
In concluding the episode, Xavier reflects on his resilience and the continuous journey of personal and professional growth. He underscores the significance of his work in providing purpose to others, combating misinformation, and fostering a community grounded in common sense and accountability.
Notable Quotes:
"This is bigger than me. It's bigger than all of us. It's about those kids."
— Xavier Derusso [75:14]
"I have to leave this world with more people who have common sense and wanting to help win the election."
— Xavier Derusso [57:39]
Conclusion
Episode 66 of The Sage Steele Show presents a compelling narrative of transformation, resilience, and the pursuit of truth through adversity. Xavier Derusso's candid discussions offer listeners an intimate glimpse into the complexities of identity, political activism, and personal healing. His journey serves as a testament to the power of self-discovery and the impact one individual can have in challenging prevailing narratives and inspiring others toward meaningful change.