My Fiancé (Dave Barbuto) Interviews Me | Sage Steele Show | EP 72

Summary

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The Sage Steele Show — Episode 72

Title: My Fiancé (Dave Barbuto) Interviews Me
Release Date: September 10, 2025
Host: Sage Steele
Guest/Interviewer: Dave Barbuto (Sage’s fiancé)

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Overview

In a twist on her usual format, Sage Steele hands hosting duties to her fiancé, Dave Barbuto, just 48 hours before their wedding. The episode becomes a deeply personal, candid, and often humorous conversation about their relationship, family, careers, faith, and the unique journey that has brought them together. With their wedding imminent, the couple uses this platform to “memorialize” their story and share heartfelt reflections on love, parenting, vulnerability, personal growth, and what lies ahead.

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Key Themes & Discussion Points

1. The Role Reversal & Setting the Stage (00:00–03:30)

• Dave opens the episode as host, explaining his motivation:
  "This is important to memorialize before we got married." (00:53, Dave)
• Sage is surprised by being in the guest seat and initially out of her comfort zone with Dave steering the show.

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2. Relaxed Beginnings & Candid Banter (03:30–06:00)

• Light-hearted poking fun at podcast rituals (the "show about socks") establishes their playful dynamic.
• Quick segues into musings on Sage’s ever-changing hairstyles and attempts to name them, with humor about bad hair days:
  • "The plan usually ends up being based on how the curls decide to behave that day." (04:22, Sage)
• Dave teases Sage with a sports analogy for bad hair days: "You're on the injured reserve for four weeks." (05:47, Dave)

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3. Sage’s ESPN Reflections & Most Meaningful Career Moments (06:00–16:00)

• After 16½ years at ESPN, Sage shares the top moments she cherishes.
• Most profound memory: Veterans Day 2016 at Arlington National Cemetery, hosting SportsCenter live with her father, retired Colonel Gary Steele, as a guest, and her grandfather buried nearby:
  • "My grandfather's buried there ... Buffalo Soldier Frank Steele ... It was so full circle. Not about me, but I just felt like I was making—hopefully making—him proud at that moment." (10:49, Sage)
  • Poignant moment with Taps playing as they signed off, witnessing a soldier salute at a grave site.
• Other highlighted experiences: covering Super Bowls, NBA Finals, etc.
• Discussed the emotional strength and faith required after returning from ESPN suspension, feeling like an outsider, and the routine of praying with her parents before work to find peace:
  • "When doing that, I did feel completely protected, like I had a bubble around me. And so no matter what came at me...I felt protected." (14:45, Sage)

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4. Faith, Daily Devotionals, and Its Role in Their Lives (16:16–20:55)

• Both describe the impact of daily devotionals (by Charles Stanley) and how building a habit of shared scripture has grounded their relationship, including their shared upbringing in the Catholic Church.
• Sage’s father sends daily scripture in the family group chat; now, she and Dave read and discuss devotionals each day, even sharing with their children:
  • "It feels like our day is incomplete if we haven't done that." (18:47, Sage)
  • "I don't think that there has been one that we've read that I don't think about later in the day...it's a good reminder." (19:49, Dave)

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5. Parenting, “Launching” Children, and Lessons Across Generations (20:55–28:40)

• Discuss experiences with their combined five children, especially Sage’s eldest, Quinn, transitioning into adulthood, facing loneliness post-college, and advice to her siblings.
• Value of pushing children out of their comfort zones, fostering independence by encouraging them to attend college in diverse regions, and stories of adapting from military family life.
• Shared vulnerability about the challenges and worries of parenting, and lessons learned from frequently moving as military kids themselves:
  • "When you're told to be less of you, it actually hits hard." (79:34, Sage, reflecting later on)

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6. Personal Vulnerability & Wedding Emotions (28:40–32:29)

• Honest talk about nerves and excitement leading up to the wedding—Dave is calm, Sage fluctuates between nervous and “game mode.”
• Mutual reflection on how quickly their relationship advanced, underscoring there is “no magic time frame” for knowing you’ve found the right person.
  • "Did I know? Yeah, I knew that night." (31:08, Sage)
  • "It was about two days later where I was like, wow, this is totally different." (31:19, Dave)

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7. "How We Met"—Their Serendipitous Origin Story (32:29–49:50)

• Sage recounts their meeting: at a veterans charity event in Nashville, both as “plus ones”—through a long-standing connection between their mothers from military days and playing basketball against Sage’s brother in high school.
• Both admit initial intrigue and instant connection, sharing a two-hour in-depth conversation at the after-party.
• Lighthearted play-by-play of how Dave asked for Sage’s number ("Well, how do you expect to do that?"), and how her best friend Katie predicted their marriage that same night.
  • _"She looked at me ... and said, 'You're gonna marry him. Don't f*** it up.'" (52:22, Katie via Sage)

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8. Bonding Over Life's “Hard Parts” (44:33–48:36)

• Both describe connecting deeply over shared experiences: divorce, parenting challenges, and life after heartbreak.
  • "It was just really nice. And I felt this massive connection because of the hard parts that we share." (46:41, Sage)
• Reflection on how their parents, especially mothers, provided support systems during those times, keeping their friendship alive across 30+ years.

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9. Vulnerability, Protection, and the Importance of Support (80:37–85:29)

• Moving discussion about Sage’s desire for both emotional and physical protection—not out of neediness, but wanting to let herself “be taken care of” after years of self-reliance:
  • "I wanted to feel physically and emotionally protected and that I didn’t have to go do it alone and to feel like I had to support myself and everybody alone." (80:51, Sage)
• Dave’s commitment to opening doors, carrying bags, and being present for her—Sage’s daughters notice, raising their own expectations.

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10. Building a Relationship “By the List” and Living Authentically (66:13–79:34)

• Early in their relationship, Dave asked Sage: “What do you want in a relationship? Top five.”
  • Sage shares her list, including: faith in God, spontaneity, encouragement, mutual celebration, physical attraction, being active, similar values (“no liberals!”), height, and being protective.
  • They playfully check off each trait, highlighting how these have shaped their bond and inspired others in their families.
  • "I was just finally being honest for the first time... not just share what I now need without shame...but to receive it." (85:19, Sage)

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11. Wedding Anticipation, Gratitude, and Looking Ahead (94:41–104:14)

• Both discuss the whirlwind logistics and emotions of planning their upcoming wedding—with deep appreciation for everyone supporting them, especially their children and parents.
• Sage reflects on her parents being present for her second marriage, something she feared might not happen, and on the healing witnessed by the children.

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12. Word Association & Heartfelt Tributes (103:09–109:52)

• Dave conducts a “word association” segment, asking Sage for one-word answers (which often become rich anecdotes) about each child, her parents, and pivotal dates.
• Sage’s emotional observations about her three children (Quinn, Nicholas, Evan), her parents, and the meaning of family and chosen moments:
  • On her father: “My dad’s my first love.” (104:12, Sage)
  • On November 12th: "The day my life changed forever." (110:02, Sage)

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13. Closing Reflections: Faith, Authenticity, and Partnership (111:00–119:52)

• Both reflect on how they didn’t expect to find this depth of love again—and the importance of patience, faith, being authentic, and letting go of control.
• Honest admissions about moving on from past relationships, the bittersweetness of not sharing all of life’s chapters, and gratitude for their blended family.
• Dave: "I'm with my best friend who loves me and encourages me. That is life changing." (111:03)
• Sage: "Honestly, Dave, you changed my life forever. And thank you for putting up with me, and thank you for loving me, and thank you for committing to the rest of your life with me. What a blessing." (119:04)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On their ESPN moments:
  "To be there at that moment, it was so much bigger than sports, so much bigger than me or my father or anything. It was just really meaningful." (11:39, Sage)

• On letting go and being cared for:
  "I don't realize...how much of a barrier I had put up because I was like, nope, gotta be tough...that did not seem needy..." (81:10, Sage)

• On partnership and lists:
  "At first I was so impressed and excited that you knew the answer to that question. You had done your work. You knew what was important to you in a relationship. You were ready." (69:10, Dave)

• On blending families & weddings: "We're doing it our way. I want to be very present...and I'm just so grateful we get to do this, and it's literally because of God bringing us here." (64:12–65:12, Sage)

• On authenticity:
  "If we're not just our genuine, authentic selves, then...what are we doing?" (87:56, Sage)

• On their journey and gratitude:
  "This wedding is a celebration...of so many people who have stood by our side, picked us up, and punched us when we needed it." (91:12, Sage)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• 00:53: Dave takes over as host, lays out intentions for the episode
• 06:13: Sage describes her top moments at ESPN, notably Veterans Day live at Arlington
• 14:45: Discussion of faith and protection through tough career moments
• 17:43: The role of daily devotionals for them and their families
• 22:00: Reflection on Sage’s daughter Quinn’s transition post-college
• 32:29: Detailed story of how Sage and Dave met
• 44:33: Connection over shared challenges—divorce, parenting
• 66:13: Discussion of Sage's "Top 5 (+)" list for a relationship
• 88:51: Letting go, authenticity, and trusting in the process
• 103:09: “Word association” segment—tributes to parents, children, and each other
• 110:02: November 12th declared as life-changing
• 119:04: Closing gratitude from Sage

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Tone & Style

• Intimate & Candid: The episode’s tone is consistently warm, vulnerable, personal, playful, and deeply reflective—often swinging from laughter to tears.
• Conversational: Frequent banter and inside jokes keep it lively and relatable, even during heavy or emotional moments.
• Uplifting & Encouraging: The conversation is filled with mutual encouragement, faith, and gratitude for past struggles and present blessings.

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For New Listeners

This episode offers an authentic peek behind the curtain of Sage Steele’s life well beyond sports. Listeners will find a blend of love story, life lessons, family humor, and wisdom about growth, faith, and healing—with an undeniable chemistry and warmth between Sage and Dave. It will especially resonate with anyone experiencing major life transitions, blending families, or seeking hope after heartbreak.

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Transcript

[Sage Steele]

This episode is brought to you by Lifelock. When you visit the doctor, you probably hand over your insurance, your ID and contact details. It's just one of the many places that has your personal info, and if any of them accidentally expose it, you could be at risk for identity theft. Lifelock monitors millions of data points a second. If you become a victim, they'll fix it, guaranteed, or your money back. Save up to 40% your first [e-mail] podcast terms apply. Usually, this is my chair. Usually I'm in control because it is called the Sage Deal Show. However, my fiance, Dave Barbuto, has taken over. I found out about this a couple of days ago and was told, show up and don't ask any questions. So I didn't. Someone else asked questions today. Hi, babe.

[Dave Barbuto]

Hey.

[Sage Steele]

Would you want to explain why you made me do this?

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. I mean, this is. This is important to memorialize before we got married. And you know her from her longtime broadcasting career, an elite career over. Over decades. He said elite, but you don't know. What you don't know is some of the other things we talked about. We talked about how we met our families, the importance of our children in our lives, faith in God and things that really, really matter, and what we want the next 38 plus years of our life to be like. So we really hope you enjoy this episode.

[Sage Steele]

Wait, don't. Don't sign off yet. I want to make sure everybody knows we are taping this 48 hours before we get married. When this airs, when this drops, we will have been married for five days.

[Dave Barbuto]

Five days.

[Sage Steele]

So a week from today, taping days.

[Dave Barbuto]

We'Ll be an old married couple.

[Sage Steele]

We'll be an old married couple. Yeah. Will you still be talking to me? How's it gonna be? This is so special. I had no idea and was not planning on not being in control. So forgive me for what you see here. But anyway, I'll stop.

[Dave Barbuto]

You did a good job. Oh.

[Sage Steele]

Oh. Okay. Coach coming in.

[Dave Barbuto]

That's right. We hope you enjoy this episode of the Sage Steel Show.

[Sage Steele]

What?

[Dave Barbuto]

Do you listen? Do you. You can't. I don't tease guests and I don't mock. You don't tease and mock your guests.

[Sage Steele]

It's cute.

[Dave Barbuto]

Okay. Do you know the deal with the show about socks? You have to. You have to wear socks.

[Sage Steele]

Why so weird?

[Dave Barbuto]

I don't. I didn't make the rules, but I am substituting today. Sage is out, so I had to. I had to be in charge. Here are your options.

[Sage Steele]

Oh, you're giving me Choices?

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah, I gave you choices. I got mine on that match my attire. I like this a lot.

[Sage Steele]

I was going to say, I think.

[Dave Barbuto]

This one looks really good with what you're wearing.

[Sage Steele]

Okay.

[Dave Barbuto]

These are too bland. So you want to go with this one?

[Sage Steele]

Well, apparently I should.

[Dave Barbuto]

I think it's the right one.

[Sage Steele]

Okay.

[Dave Barbuto]

Looks comfy.

[Sage Steele]

Yes, they're all so comfy. I noticed you have yours on, so I know why. Why would you ever not? Like, it does bring out. I think, like, it relaxes everybody.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah, No, I changed my mood completely when I put them on.

[Sage Steele]

You feel different.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. I wasn't even ready to do this, and now I feel amazing.

[Sage Steele]

What are we doing?

[Dave Barbuto]

Listen, we're just. We're just getting ready for the big day, and we decided we were gonna talk first.

[Sage Steele]

Well, I didn't decide this.

[Dave Barbuto]

That's true. David and I figured this out.

[Sage Steele]

This is not. Yeah. This was not my decision or idea or any really anything I knew much about.

[Dave Barbuto]

Are you nervous?

[Sage Steele]

No.

[Dave Barbuto]

Okay, that's good. That's good. What?

[Sage Steele]

What?

[Dave Barbuto]

So how does this work? Do I just start asking you questions?

[Sage Steele]

Yeah, you don't ask to ask questions. You just kind of. You're just a conversation segue.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

Into it.

[Dave Barbuto]

That's now. Okay. So have you. I was thinking about this the other day because we never talked about this, and I. I love your hair. I know. You got your hair done this week. It looks great.

[Sage Steele]

Thank God I got it done.

[Dave Barbuto]

It looks great. And I was gonna ask you, do you have names for the different hairstyles? Like, when you do different things with it, like when you put it up, when you have it down. Do you know?

[Sage Steele]

Because I don't. Plan usually ends up being based on how the curls decide to behave that day.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

Cause I should have different names for.

[Dave Barbuto]

Each one because what would some of the names be?

[Sage Steele]

Some of them.

[Dave Barbuto]

No, sorry.

[Sage Steele]

Like this over here. We have to bleep a lot of this. See, this is going to be a different side of me because I'm not the host.

[Dave Barbuto]

Keep it clean, Sage. This is my first time.

[Sage Steele]

Okay.

[Dave Barbuto]

Okay.

[Sage Steele]

Okay. They're just very, very difficult at times. But what I've done in the last few years is own it.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

Like, the good, the bad, the ugly. It is what it is. And then, like, if you give up trying to make them all perfect.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. I thought you'd have, like, the Whitney Houston one, the, you know, the sporty one.

[Sage Steele]

I like a ponytail with bangs down.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah, that's my favorite.

[Sage Steele]

And I do know this because it's this Is a lot. And it's hot. Especially here in Tennessee or where I live in Florida, too. And so it's nice to have it up, but still have a little style. I don't know.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah, I like it when it's up.

[Sage Steele]

You know how in sports it's like, okay, you're probable, questionable, doubtful.

[Dave Barbuto]

That's how I dictate those versions.

[Sage Steele]

A lot of doubtful days. And we just go with it.

[Dave Barbuto]

Your head's on the pop box, but.

[Sage Steele]

We push through it. Yes.

[Dave Barbuto]

You're on the injured reserve for four weeks.

[Sage Steele]

Yes. IR a lot.

[Dave Barbuto]

That's right. Let's transition to sports. I think it says here you had a small stint at espn.

[Sage Steele]

It says here.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

You did a lot of research.

[Dave Barbuto]

I did. I did a little bit of research.

[Sage Steele]

A little Stint, yeah. Yeah.

[Dave Barbuto]

17 years.

[Sage Steele]

Almost like 16 and a half. I usually round up because it feels like 32 since it was 16 now. It was. It was a minute and it was awesome.

[Dave Barbuto]

We talk about it a lot, you and I, and just, you know, there's. There's a lot of great moments and a lot of hard moments. But if you, if you had to pick, like, top three moments on espn, what would they be? What were the things that, like now, when it's all over, you're behind, it's behind you. Like, that you think about and really, really cherish.

[Sage Steele]

Several. I think the one that I will always be the most grateful for was Veterans Day 2016, right after the election. A controversial election in 2016.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And we took SportsCenter live on the road. I guess it was like most of the morning show that we did at Arlington National Cemetery.

[Dave Barbuto]

Oh, yeah. And it was sacred place.

[Sage Steele]

That's the word. Yeah, sacred. And my grandfather's buried there on my dad's side. Buffalo soldier Frank Steele. And I hadn't been to his grave. This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Do you ever find yourself playing the budgeting game? Well, with the name your price tool from Progressive, you can find options that fit your budget and potentially lower your bills. Try [e-mail] Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates Price and coverage match limited by state law. Not available in all states site since he died in 2003. Hadn't been back to Arlington National Cemetery since then.

[Dave Barbuto]

So are your parents there with you?

[Sage Steele]

Well, they happen to be in town visiting my brother in Baltimore. And so when we figured out, you know, that coincidence, I was like, come by because they never get to. They can watch me on tv, but to be there when I'm doing TV Never really happened. Maybe once or twice during all those years at ESPN. So they're like, well, come. Come down 95 from Baltimore. And then my producer, Tom Engel, he. When my parents pulled up, and he'd met my parents before, and he's like, you know, we should really have your dad on. He offers some pretty good, maybe perspective here in Arlington with his father having been buried here and his career in the military. And. And I told my dad, and he's like, absolutely not. This is about you. Absolutely not.

[Dave Barbuto]

I can see that.

[Sage Steele]

And I can see, like, my. I can get my dad to say yes to a lot of things. I can kind of get my way with him. That's his little girl, no matter how old I am. And. But I knew the way he looked at me and his voice and his jaw, which I tend to use, apparently, according to my kids. Like, he. He was like, no. I went back to Tom. I said, he's not doing it.

[Dave Barbuto]

Did it surprise you, like, when he said it a little bit, that he.

[Sage Steele]

Was that adamant about it? And I told Tom that. And I said, if you want him. I said, maybe if you try. Because I agree, it would be really cool just because I was a dependent, obviously. But I was never in the military. I thought. So Tom convinced him to do it.

[Dave Barbuto]

Wow.

[Sage Steele]

And it is by far my favorite segment I ever did on ESPN because it was live on SportsCenter. We didn't practice it. I didn't really know what I was gonna say.

[Dave Barbuto]

Were you interviewing your dad?

[Sage Steele]

I interviewed my dad live.

[Dave Barbuto]

Wow.

[Sage Steele]

In the middle of Arlington National Cemetery in. And just asked him, you know, not as father, daughter, but asked him to, you know, give his take on why Veterans Day is so important. And his answer was beautiful. I didn't tell him what I was going to ask him. And then something else that I said, and I think the importance of being here for him personally is what it was.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And he mentioned being here next to his little girl, which got me going. And I could see his eyes well up. And then he talked about his father bearing. Buried 200 yards behind us.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And as a Buffalo soldier, you know, who. As a black man, he wasn't allowed at that time to be in the same division, I guess, as white soldiers.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. They had their own unit.

[Sage Steele]

Yeah. And so for him to be right there watching his son, who did have an incredible military career as well, and his granddaughter, who had this crazy dream where, when my grandfather was fighting in World War II, could he have ever imagined, you know, his granddaughter with this color Skin. Hosting a nationally televised TV from Arlington.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

It was so full circle. Not about me, but I just felt like I was making. Hopefully making him proud at that moment. And then we were timing it out to the end of the show, and as I was signing off, literally, the guy behind us. What was it actually? What was it? Someone was starting to play Taps.

[Dave Barbuto]

Oh, wow. There was a funeral going on.

[Sage Steele]

There were funerals throughout the day at Arlington National Cemetery and started to play Taps. And I was kind of tossing to him a soldier. And as I did that and was signing off later, I learned I looked. You know, if I had looked over my shoulder, I would have seen a man who was at someone's grave site.

[Dave Barbuto]

Oh, gosh.

[Sage Steele]

And he turned to hear Taps. He took off his hat, and he stood at attention in a green shirt and just saluted.

[Dave Barbuto]

Wow.

[Sage Steele]

And that's how he went off the air. Wow.

[Dave Barbuto]

That's pretty wild. Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

I've done Super Bowls, I've done Masters, I've done World Series. I've done every sporting event just about. And to be there at that moment, it was so much bigger than sports, so much bigger than me or my father or anything. It was just really meaningful. And I thought it was always my dream to host that show. Never thought I'd be able to do it there with my dad by my side.

[Dave Barbuto]

Host the Veterans Day show.

[Sage Steele]

Just in general.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. Oh, you mean SportsCenter in general. Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

Sports center in general was such a dream.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And I have my dad standing there, my grandfather buried there.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. That's wild.

[Sage Steele]

What a blessing. So other moments at the NBA Finals and all that, but, like, to.

[Dave Barbuto]

So that's the point.

[Sage Steele]

Being able to bring my. It is to bring my family into something. And that's why no matter how things ended there, I have great personal memories like that. And as a team, my producers that day, we all produced great, memorable television.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And I got to be a part of that. I'm sorry. That's a very long story.

[Dave Barbuto]

No, that's great. I mean, I. I think you've told me about that, but not in that detail. And, I mean, I can. I can see Colonel not wanting to do it, but then being convinced because the importance of it and, you know, the reverence for the. For the place and his perspective certainly, you know, relevant. And he's great. You know, he can speak to anybody and do it eloquently, so that's cool. So that's the. I could see why that's the top. Any others that you. That, like, when you think Back on the days of ESPN that you're like, this was, I remember you saying, quite often your best work came at, you know, late in your. In your time.

[Sage Steele]

Yeah.

[Dave Barbuto]

Anything from that time that you were like, gosh, this was a tough one, and it went really, really well. And, you know, maybe not what you expected.

[Sage Steele]

I think. Well, yes. There were many shows after I came back from my suspension from ESPN that I was scared every day. I knew I was being looked at differently by my peers, by my bosses, for sure. Who knows what other viewers elsewhere thought? But that's what I found, is that every day when I pushed through that fear, like, I would walk in feeling sick, butterflies in my stomach, a job I'd done for well over a decade.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And all of a sudden, it felt different.

[Dave Barbuto]

Shocking.

[Sage Steele]

Yeah.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

But I would go in so scared. And what you have heard me talk about is the prayer that I would say before I walked in every single time. And so I did feel this. Like, you know, I would call my mom and dad as I pulled into the parking lot at espn, and I'd put on one more coat of mascara while I was talking to them, and he's like, what's on the show? Blah, blah, blah. And then. And then they'd say, okay, you ready for the prayer? And no matter where they were, they always were on speaker. And we did St. Michael the Archangel.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And when doing that, I did feel completely protected, Like I had a bubble around me. And so no matter what came at me while on the air, whether it's, you know, work related or something personal from someone I work with, based on everything that had happened, I felt protected. It was so amazing and not a coincidence. I know that I dug deeper into my faith during that time, obviously, the prayer, but, I mean, in every aspect of my life. And so I don't think it's a coincidence that it was so scary in many ways, but I had this peace about me. And there were many times where I was doing live shots, live interviews, and we get done with it. You know, you prepare so much for each one. The producers helped you prepare, et cetera. And I remember getting done with interviews and going, crushed it.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah, you could feel it.

[Sage Steele]

I could feel it. We all know in whatever we do for a living, when you've done a.

[Dave Barbuto]

Good job at something, it's so great.

[Sage Steele]

And I would leave and I would go home, and my dad in particular, as he watched with a certain eye, and I called him as I entered the building and called him when I left, and he was like, oh, you crushed that. Oh, you did this. Or there's times where he's like, did you mean to say this?

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. I've heard them give you feedback. I mean, they're not. They've always been really.

[Sage Steele]

But they had the perspective of the fear that I was living in at that time and trying to compartmentalize enough to put it behind me for those two live hours. And yeah, I'm really proud of that time.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. Speaking of faith, and we've talked about this a lot and it's always been part of your life. It's always been important to you. And I think like anybody, it ebbs and flows. Right. It's sort of. There are times where you lean on your faith more than others. You and I have spent a lot of time in this, Right. Reading this every day, this devotional that your dad gave you. And it's been, I mean, it's been great for me and I love that we do it together. But what has this meant to you? Like not just you and I doing it together, but just the dedication to it every day.

[Sage Steele]

You know, I've tried several times to read the Bible and it's been very overwhelming for me.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And I have friends who've done a great job putting together, you know, apps and any other, you know, books that to help make it seem easier to consume and they've done a decent job at that book that my dad gave me, gave all three kids a few years back.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

Has really made a difference. Starts off with the scripture and then there's a, for me, a really beautiful and I think you feel the same way explanation using real life examples. And I like that.

[Dave Barbuto]

Easy to read English.

[Sage Steele]

Thank you. It's dumbed down for me. It's fully translated and I like when the author, what's his name?

[Dave Barbuto]

It is Charles. Stanley.

[Sage Steele]

Charles Stanley. He'll say friend and then remind you, yeah, you know, friend, you are not doing this alone. Something like that. And every time I feel like when he says friend, he's talking to me.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And it makes it very personal. I'm like, okay, I can do that. And when we've, you know, we. So my dad and I would talk about, my mom and I would talk about it, but not as consistently as, you know, he sends a scripture every single day in our family. Group chat. Every single day. And then we've got my, you know, 11 year old cousin who will chime in on it too. It's really awesome. But what it's done for us I think is so cool.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

We have one copy. I gave mine to Dave because he tends to not forget things as much as me. And so no matter where we are or you are, you have that.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And sometimes it's a screenshot. You're driving to work in Nashville, and then I'll be in Florida, and I'll read it because you're driving. And it feels like our day is incomplete if we haven't done that.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

I love that we've gotten to that point.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. I agree. It's special. And I think. I don't think that there has been one that we've read that I don't think about. Later in the day, sometime during the day, something hits me where I'm like, oh, I remember that. And we read about that this morning, and it's just. It's a good reminder. But I love that it's. It is personalized than it is. It's based on, like, real life today, things that you're gonna interact with and things that are gonna come across your plate. So.

[Sage Steele]

Yes. That's why I love it. It's short and sweet, and you do. It pops back up during your day and. Because we've made a system of it. Yeah. I feel. I feel like I'm more accountable with it. It's. For us, it's worked.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. Yeah, it is. I definitely recommend it to people. I like that. We've also shared it with others, which I think is great. And we've talked, too. I think for both of us growing up Catholic, it's not. You don't do as much outward portrayal of your faith. Right. It's not something that's kind of built into the Catholic Church and how it works different in other faiths, but not in the Catholic Church. And we've both talked about how there's ways to do that that don't feel like you're professing or pushing your faith on people, but there's a way to do that more. And I like the fact that we're trying to. You certainly have probably more than I have, but it's a good example that you're setting there.

[Sage Steele]

We. Well, we. And we did it. Yeah. We've done it with our kids.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

When we were in Costa Rica.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

Pulled it out a couple times or in the car. And they have opinions on it.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah, they were very engaged. It was great to see. Yeah, I liked it. I know. Can't get them to put their phones down, but they did for that, which is great.

[Sage Steele]

Yeah.

[Dave Barbuto]

Speaking of the kids, so Quinn is, I would say, somewhat Launched?

[Sage Steele]

Yeah.

[Dave Barbuto]

Not fully launched. Right. She's like, she's got a job, she graduated. She has a place to live. She has bills to pay. What do you think advice you would give? Nicholas is next, then Evan, then Jake, then Avery. It's a full house. What do you think Quinn would say to them? What do you think the advice you'd give them?

[Sage Steele]

Mm. First of all, she'd be like, guys have so much fun in college. Cause once it's over, the real world is really hard. Like, she would be like, this is dramatic. You know, the other day I posted on Instagram when she was writing me, she's like, mom, I cannot believe I have to do this the rest of my life. And I'm like, work. What? She goes, work. Oh, my God. Gosh, you're so traumatic. Yes, welcome. That's why I always told. I told them that. Have fun during those four years. Focus. Get your degree, get your grades, but, like, have a great time. And I know that she's talked about that a lot with her siblings and probably your kids a little bit. Nicholas is a senior. You know, I wonder. I actually think on the other side, she would say, you know, there's. It's lonely. A little bit.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. She moved to a big city by herself.

[Sage Steele]

Yeah.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And even though we're just right up the road far enough, and she's in here alone every night, you know, that's different. Yeah. And so I think she would tell them. That's something I didn't think to tell her because it's been so long for me, but she's. You don't realize when you're in the chaos with roommates, whether it's in a dorm situation or an apartment off campus.

[Dave Barbuto]

Not alone that much. Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

You're literally never alone. You rarely have your own room.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And so this whole place, she's alone, and she's embraced it, but she also really misses the camaraderie that you have with your girlfriends or your guy friends, you know? So I think that she would say, hand type, savor it and be ready. And don't think that you're just gonna come to a new place and, you know, have a whole new group. It takes some time, but I think she's learning to be alone.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And I love that. Like, it took me a lot longer than it took her to be okay with that. So.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah, she. I mean, when she first got here, she told us several times that she was worried about, like, not having friends. And I think you and I both realized, like, that wasn't gonna last very long. She was gonna make friends, and now she has. I think that's. I think that's one. Just a tribute to her. She's just great that way. She can make friends with anybody. But I do think that that is a perspective that's really scary for kids when they go off to college and then when they go off to start their first job, Especially in a town that they didn't grow up in and a town that they don't really know anybody.

[Sage Steele]

Yeah, it does take some courage. But, you know, I mean, you know this. I told them because they all graduated from high school in Connecticut. And I'm like, I will not pay for your education if you stay up in the Northeast.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

No. And people other. Some of my friends are like, that's a little over the top sage. I'm like, I don't care. Number one, I don't like it up here. No. Get out of the cold. Get out of the. To me, just crazy politics. Like, it is just not my vibe. And most importantly, more than that, I really wanted them to experience a different part of the country that they're not familiar with. We lived out on the west coast in Arizona for three years, and that was Connecticut. Arizona. Connecticut in three years. Like, it was a lot of moving across the country. It was very difficult. High school years for Quinn was tough, but she got a taste of what it was like to be around people who are different, live differently, different socioeconomic status, all those things. So they all listen. Two were in college in North Carolina, one in Mississippi. That could not be more different than Connecticut. And so when they do that for college, that's that first step. Four years.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. Get out of your comfort zone, go somewhere else.

[Sage Steele]

Then to accept a job in a town you've never been to after is a little bit easier because you've proven to yourself that you've already pushed through some scary things. Doesn't mean this isn't going to be scary. But I am very proud of how she has embraced it. She took your advice when we were in Costa Rica and had, you know, was like, well, there's this Instagram thing or TikTok. A TikTok thing. Or is it, like, you know, new to Nashville?

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And so she saw some girls profiles, and you were like, reach out to them. Text him. See if they want to meet for coffee. And she didn't listen to me. She listened to you and she did it. And she hangs out with them now, and it's been a couple months.

[Dave Barbuto]

That's very Cool.

[Sage Steele]

So, like, she would probably say that too.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

Just reach out. Just shoot your shot.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And then whatever happens, happens. And now look.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. She's got a big group. I mean, there's. There's probably 10 or 15 people that she's.

[Sage Steele]

Yeah.

[Dave Barbuto]

Made friends with.

[Sage Steele]

Makes me happy.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah, it's great. Yeah. I think all. I think all of the kids will be capable. They're all capable of it, for sure. And I think they all will do well in that regard. And I think sometimes I wonder if our experience growing up in the military and moving around so much, it was easy for us. I wouldn't say I loved it every time, but it was easy for us. And I think our kids pick up on some of that just secondarily from us. Just the ability to get comfortable no matter where you are. I wonder if they picked up some of that even though they didn't have the same experience.

[Sage Steele]

Yeah. The attitude that we come with. I think so. And, you know, we lived and, like you, in different countries by the time I was 11, four different countries, including this one. And, you know, each kid does handle it differently.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And I was super shy, I guess, struggled, but I didn't know that there was any other, different way to live. I thought everybody moved around like that every two years and moved across the world. Realized that in seventh grade when I. We moved back to Colorado from Belgium. That isn't how everybody lives. And they've been together since kindergarten. I was like, what? So weird.

[Dave Barbuto]

It's totally different.

[Sage Steele]

And then I was jealous because their.

[Dave Barbuto]

Friendships other deep and long.

[Sage Steele]

Yeah, we didn't have that. But I was okay with it. My brother Chad was okay with it. My youngest brother, Courtney, did not. It was harder for him. He really struggled with it more. He didn't move as much. So then he wasn't as, you know. So each kid receives it differently, handles it differently. But I know I wouldn't change my childhood, and I think it's helped me push them.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah, for sure.

[Sage Steele]

Because I'm like. We moved to Connecticut when Evan was going into sixth grade and she graduated from high school with all those kids. And I'm like, okay, you're good. Get out. Go do something. Like, I don't mean that. Go do something different. Go push yourself. And I think that that's one thing that. I mean, there's a lot that I've screwed up as a parent. Like, there's things that, you know, we question. We. That was a miss. That the heart was in the right place, like, you know, but I Know that I did that part. Well, to say, I don't care if you're uncomfortable. Yep. Let's. Let's acknowledge it and listen to it, figure out why and then move and go do it anyway.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

Like, that's one thing that I think they will hopefully someday say, my mom did that. Okay.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah, for sure. There's no doubt about that. I mean, you're sort of a. You're a. It's a great example of what you've provided for them over a long time. I mean, they've seen that for sure.

[Sage Steele]

But they were just in here, and there's a lot of things that they would say. Oh, let me tell you what she did that time. Oh, let me tell you. Right.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. I mean, we all have that, I.

[Sage Steele]

Think, and they're right.

[Dave Barbuto]

My kids love to pretend they're me and use the same phrases that I use. And they could tell right before you're about to say it.

[Sage Steele]

Exactly.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. So we got a bit of a big weekend coming up. You got some stuff planned this weekend. What are you doing?

[Sage Steele]

Yeah, I'm marrying this great man.

[Dave Barbuto]

Really?

[Sage Steele]

Yeah. He's hot. He's really hot.

[Dave Barbuto]

Interesting.

[Sage Steele]

Yeah. The fact that we are doing this 48 hours before what time?

[Dave Barbuto]

I know we're in, like, we're in the short final here.

[Sage Steele]

Is it 5:15? Exactly 48 hours from now, we will be saying our vows.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yes.

[Sage Steele]

Oh, my God.

[Dave Barbuto]

I know. It's coming pretty quick.

[Sage Steele]

I just got butterflies.

[Dave Barbuto]

You nervous?

[Sage Steele]

Yeah.

[Dave Barbuto]

I've never seen you. That's not true. I've seen you nervous a couple times when I've seen you nervous before a couple of speeches. I could tell because you start tapping your foot a lot. There it is.

[Sage Steele]

Yeah. I'll get quieter.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Sage Steele]

It's almost like I go into, like a. Like a game mode.

[Dave Barbuto]

Locking in, locking it.

[Sage Steele]

That's what probably is going to be game mode.

[Dave Barbuto]

Game mode.

[Sage Steele]

Zone in.

[Dave Barbuto]

I don't think so. I don't think so.

[Sage Steele]

It's gonna be different. I am so excited. And, yeah, I think maybe nervous isn't the word. Like, is anxious the word? I don't know. All in good ways, but, like, there's just been a lot leading up to this. And as the kids reminded us a few minutes ago, it's been fast. It has been fast. And I think sometimes just because we've known that this was gonna happen doesn't mean it hasn't hit us. Sometimes, like a year ago, we didn't even know each other.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

You know?

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. It's Pretty wild.

[Sage Steele]

It's true, but I don't care about that. There's no magic time frame.

[Dave Barbuto]

No, I agree.

[Sage Steele]

There's no book. Like, okay, you have to date this long. Like I thought there was, I think a lot of people.

[Dave Barbuto]

Sure.

[Sage Steele]

And this is when you know and if you can. Really?

[Dave Barbuto]

You knew early on.

[Sage Steele]

Oh, is that what we're doing?

[Dave Barbuto]

Well, no, I've just heard you say that, so I'm just confirming. I mean, before the big day. It's pretty important.

[Sage Steele]

Dude, you already put a ring on it. Like it is too late. There's a lot of deposits that have been placed on venues couldn't get out.

[Dave Barbuto]

Of it if we wanted to.

[Sage Steele]

Yeah, no, you're stuck. Did I know? Yeah, I knew that night.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

Yeah. But I've also heard you not or say that you didn't know right away.

[Dave Barbuto]

So apparently, I mean, I had strong feelings, obviously we talked about that, but it was, it was about two days later where I was like, wow, this is totally different. And you know, we just. We were able to talk about everything. Nothing was off limits. And you and I have talked about this plenty. And like my mom said, you know, when you're not looking, you're. You're. You are your most authentic self. And I felt that right away that night. But then I felt it even more when we started talking on the phone every night. It was just like so comfortable and so natural and. Yeah, just felt perfect, you know? But it was the. It was the night you were driving to your parents house for Thanksgiving two days later.

[Sage Steele]

No, it wasn't Thanksgiving.

[Dave Barbuto]

It wasn't Thanksgiving. It was the week before that.

[Sage Steele]

I was getting ready to go take my dad from their house in Jacksonville to New York for usc.

[Dave Barbuto]

That's right.

[Sage Steele]

In New York City. Yeah. Yeah, I was doing something else at five. Yes. Yeah. Well, we met. Yeah, we met on the 12th of November. So.

[Dave Barbuto]

So I took two days and you knew in two hours.

[Sage Steele]

So are you not going to like recap the actual oh you moment?

[Dave Barbuto]

You want me to tell the story?

[Sage Steele]

I mean, I think it's important, but I'm not the host, you know.

[Dave Barbuto]

Listen, why don't you tell the people how we met? You're good at it and you always ask me to tell the story. So this time, I mean, this is your show. I'm just filling in. I'm just filling in. So I need you to tell the story.

[Sage Steele]

November 12, 2024.

[Dave Barbuto]

There we were.

[Sage Steele]

Nashville, Tennessee. We were at a charity event. Yes, Tomahawk.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah, the Tomahawk charity event. Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

Benefits, veterans. And I didn't even know what it was for my friend Katie. Love Katie Busby. She's the best.

[Dave Barbuto]

She's the best.

[Sage Steele]

I think she's landing right about now. Her husband couldn't go to the event, so she asked me to be her plus one. And as I have told the story many times, I was Everybody's favorite +1 at that point because I was always alone and usually available and flexible. Once Evan went to college, which was only two months before, three months before, I was like, oh, my gosh, I'm an empty nester. And sold the house in Connecticut, sold everything in it. Estate sale, and, like, said goodbye, sobbing, leaving that whole chapter of life, you know, drove 23 hours to Florida, stopped at Sissy, the kids in college in North Carolina, made Quinn spoon with me. She vomits to this day that I made her do that. Saw my parents for another night in Jacksonville and drove. And it was like this turning point. I'm like, oh, my gosh, I can do what I want. Let me figure this out. So I said yes to everything, including that night with Katie. And so we went out to the venue, and it was, you know, dress up, and we were just at the cocktail hour, hanging out.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. Before it started.

[Sage Steele]

Yep. With some. Some of her friends. I didn't know really anybody there. And Chase Rice, the country singer, had his dog there. So, like, no one cared about anybody else. Chase or anybody was the dog. Jack. So I was right there, if you recall, petting Jack. Stood up for a second, and up walks this tall drink of water. And he. You. You're he. That guy says. I mean, correct me if I don't get the words perfectly right, but, hi, I'm Dave, and I think we have something in common. And what was my expression?

[Dave Barbuto]

You didn't quite roll your eyes, but you were close. It was close. Yeah. I haven't seen it since then, but it was close.

[Sage Steele]

Oh, okay. Cocky. Yeah. I was like, oh, God. What? Like, you guys are all.

[Dave Barbuto]

You were nice.

[Sage Steele]

Of course I was nice. I'm. I'm always nice.

[Dave Barbuto]

You're always nice.

[Sage Steele]

But I thought this should be interesting. I don't know this guy, but I listened for sure. Cause you caught my eye and you said, my mom and your mom know each other from their days in Leavenworth, Kansas. Our dads were stationed at Fort Leavenworth. And the story goes that your mom and my mom used to help volunteer at a convent for retired nuns in Kansas in the very early 90s and have kept in touch and been Friends for more than 30 years because of that. No matter where my parents have moved. Your parents have stayed. But my parents have moved. They've kept in touch for 32 years.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And when you said that, I was like, what's your last name? I recognize the last name. I'm like, oh, my goodness. I mean, I think you saw I was intrigued for sure. And then you wanted to, like, really back up and cement it. You're like, and I used to play basketball against your brother Chad in high school, and we used to play at Gruber Gym. And Gruber Gym is on Fort Leavenworth, the army post. And when he said Gruber, Jim, guys. I was like, oh, this is.

[Dave Barbuto]

I used to dominate him, by the way.

[Sage Steele]

Did you?

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah, I just need that on the.

[Sage Steele]

He said the same.

[Dave Barbuto]

Of course he does.

[Sage Steele]

He's like, oh, I dunked on him. I remember him. He's full of it. But he is bigger than you. He's big guy.

[Dave Barbuto]

He is bigger than me.

[Sage Steele]

He's a really big guy. And at that moment, the conversation was legitimate. It was very much like, oh, wait a minute, da, da, da. And I was so intrigued. And you were polite and very calm is what I noticed. A very cool, calm confidence. And I had my 3 inch heels on and you were still taller.

[Dave Barbuto]

That's key.

[Sage Steele]

That's the only reason why I kept talking to you. I'm kidding. No, but I. I was so intrigued. The fact that you knew my mother and I believe you met her when you were in high school.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. Yeah. She. I feel like. And I have to ask my mom this weekend, but we get them together and ask. They haven't seen each other in forever. I know this will be the first time they've seen each other in so long. They've texted and things, but haven't really seen each other. But I am really confident your mom brought Christmas cookies or something to our house one time because I remember my mom would always talk about your mom and their friendship. And then I met her. She came by the house or something. She may have had Courtney with her, I don't even know. And dropped off something at the house. And so I'm pretty confident that I met her in high school.

[Sage Steele]

So since you're so much younger than me.

[Dave Barbuto]

So much.

[Sage Steele]

Three years. I mean, you're in high school. I'm in college.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And I'm, you know, at Indiana and I. So I never lived there. Right, right. And so that's why we never met.

[Dave Barbuto]

Never met.

[Sage Steele]

I think if I had. If I were your age, I would have been in high school, and who knows? I would have maybe gone to the same high school. Yeah, I have. So many times. Just thought, gosh, what if I was supposed to be speaking that week at High Point University? My kids, college. And this was. I mean, Tuesday, November 12, was exactly a week after the election. And so I was supposed to be at High Point, and I was a zombie because I was coming off the campaign trail, basically. And I was like, let me postpone this. I just need a break. And Katie's like, get your butt here at Nashville, girl. Let's go. And I was like, okay. And I think about it was another one of those say yes moments. I was saying yes to a lot of things that I, in the past would have been like, well, I don't know how much.

[Dave Barbuto]

There's always a good reason not to.

[Sage Steele]

There's tons of valid reasons. And I get freaked out sometimes if I think about, what if I hadn't? What if Katie hadn't invited me? What if her husband had been able to come? What if you hadn't broken up with your girlfriend the day before?

[Dave Barbuto]

It wasn't the day before.

[Sage Steele]

It's like two hours before.

[Dave Barbuto]

It wasn't two hours before.

[Sage Steele]

When was it? Day?

[Dave Barbuto]

It was 10 days plus beforehand.

[Sage Steele]

Oh, 10 days. You know, the first time he told the story.

[Dave Barbuto]

Oh, please.

[Sage Steele]

It was three weeks before, and then it was two weeks, and now it's 10. Are we staying on 10 days?

[Dave Barbuto]

I have. It has been 10 days since the beginning.

[Sage Steele]

Okay, it has been 10 days. Well, I'm gonna give you a lot of credit now after that.

[Dave Barbuto]

Thank you.

[Sage Steele]

Because I don't know that I would have gone to something like that alone. Yeah, it was. It was not formal, black tie, but guys were in suits, women wearing dresses and kind of fancy. And you went alone to that? I wouldn't have done that. Why did you go alone?

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah, I remember talking to my parents about it, talking to a bunch of my college buddies. They'll all be here this weekend. And sort of going like, I don't know if I should do this. Not something I do. I just don't normally go to those types of events. And, you know, I was obviously interested in it because it was for veterans, and a friend had invited me, but it was just one of those things. I remember talking to my mom, and she was like, you know, just go. Just go have fun. And, like, you never know who you'll meet. Might be really great. So reluctantly, I went. You know, I went. And obviously, I'm so thankful, but that.

[Sage Steele]

Was awkward for you.

[Dave Barbuto]

That would have been, yeah. I got there 30 minutes before the couple that I was meeting. The guy and his wife Mike and his wife Caitlin, that invited us, invited me. And you know, they weren't there yet. And so I was just kind of standing around by myself for half an hour. That's when I really started to regret it. I was like, why did I do this? I know no one. The people that invited me here aren't here yet. And I'm just walking in circles around.

[Sage Steele]

Because as a former military officer, you are prompt. And when I was on the prompt.

[Dave Barbuto]

You know me, I'm on time.

[Sage Steele]

1900 hours, you are there.

[Dave Barbuto]

I'm at 1845. Yes, I'm there. Yeah, yeah. No, I mean, it was. I mean, obviously I'm so thankful that I did, but yeah, it was a little outside of my norm for sure.

[Sage Steele]

So that's another moment where it's like, what if, what if you hadn't. Because it would have been very understandable if you're like, yeah, nevermind, I don't have a date now. You know, what if I had decided to, you know, go to North Carolina after all? There's so many of those. And then we had dinner, you know, went to our separate assigned tables and later found each other, you know. Are you going to the post game? Post game. See, I still have a sports brain. Post party.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah, after party. Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

Yeah, thanks. And I. But I was looking for you.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah, I was looking for you. I was looking for you. We found each other kind of as it was, people were starting to clear out.

[Sage Steele]

Did you have a strategy at that moment?

[Dave Barbuto]

I mean, just be around waiting for you to like break away if you were gonna break away. I didn't know what your plans were, but I was like, okay, I gotta at least talk to her one more time. So we didn't really. We didn't really finish much of a conversation before the party started.

[Sage Steele]

It was just like, yeah, they were.

[Dave Barbuto]

Talk for five minutes and everybody go inside. So we had unfinished business. Business.

[Sage Steele]

Apparently we did. But I, I asked you, like, you came up to me at the beginning, you started this whole thing. And then it was supposed to party because Katie's like, who was that? And at dinner, and I told her and she's like, he's cute.

[Dave Barbuto]

I was like, I know Katie Busby thinks I'm cute.

[Sage Steele]

I mean, I don't know if she does now, but at the end.

[Dave Barbuto]

She probably doesn't now. You're right.

[Sage Steele]

Yeah. And she was like, you gotta find him. I was like, I know. So I'm looking around the whole dinner, and then I saw you walk by at one point, and I was like, is that him? And then you turned around at the other end of the room, and you looked right back at me, and I was like, oh. Cause then awkward sage comes out, and it's like, oh, God, what do I know? And, yeah, you hung around. And then I was with the Katy group with everybody, and we were just gonna take the shuttle to whatever place on Broadway, and you were just lurking, and I came over, and then we went to the post party, and I walked in, and so I'm thinking on the way down to Nashville, I'm like.

[Dave Barbuto]

How do I play? Cool.

[Sage Steele]

Yeah. I'm like, you know what? I need to let him lead. Like, if he is interested in me, I think he's really very handsome and seems kind. And I knew you were legit. Like, your story was legit, so. But I'm like, I'm not gonna go looking it for him right away now. I walked in and looked to see if you were there, and then I was like, no, he has to approach me because. Yeah. I think I've learned a lot of lessons through the years where I just needed you to lead in that way, and I wouldn't. I don't think I said it in my head at that point that way, but I know now, as you felt it. Nope. If this is meant to be.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. And then you came in and you guys were looking at hats. I remember that. And then you kind of came closer to where I was. And that's when I came over and started talking to you again. That's when you beelined two hours of talking.

[Sage Steele]

It was a lot.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

We went deep really fast.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. Yeah, we did. And we have so many similar experiences in life. You know, just growing up in the military, kids, teenage kids, all that goes along with that. Divorce, careers that are challenging and busy and sometimes, you know, wonderful and sometimes, you know, really, really hard.

[Sage Steele]

Yeah.

[Dave Barbuto]

And so, yeah, we did. We talked about all of it.

[Sage Steele]

All of it.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And you understood a lot of what I was saying. Yeah, I understood a lot of what you were saying, unfortunately, in some ways, because it was just, you know, had to do with the heartbreak of divorce and managing that, how tough it is on the kids.

[Dave Barbuto]

We talked about that a lot.

[Sage Steele]

Yeah. And our parents. That ends up. That. That is one thing our parents, our mothers bonded over.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

Is the fact that they were heartbroken for our situations.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And kind of just wanted to be a friend. To each other and help each other through it. And I was first. And your mom was a good, you know, ear for my mom. And I think vice versa when you went through it. And even though they hadn't seen each other in, you know, almost 30 years at the time, like, it's crazy.

[Dave Barbuto]

I know.

[Sage Steele]

So to talk to someone that night who fully got it, and your kids are a little younger than mine, but not much. And so it was special. And I just. I also felt like if he's willing to talk about things that are actually important.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

You know, not like Monday Night Football the night before, like, whatever.

[Dave Barbuto]

We didn't talk about sports at all.

[Sage Steele]

We did not.

[Dave Barbuto]

We didn't talk about anything. Sports.

[Sage Steele]

But it was. I knew at that point in my life that I was not going to hold back from being my authentic self.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And talking about things that mattered to me, you know, and with any adult, you assume it's going to matter to them as well. Not maybe as much, but, like, if me talking about my kids is not interesting to you, then we're not gonna end up together.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. Yeah. For sure.

[Sage Steele]

Stuff like that. So it was. It was just really nice. And I felt this massive connection because of the hard parts that we share.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

Which was really interesting.

[Dave Barbuto]

You know, we don't. I. We talked about this early on. Like, it's easy to bond over difficulties or shared difficulties. Right. Like, it's, you know, misery loves company. You know, all the cliches that go along with it. But I think we purposefully sort of discussed them, went deep on them, talked about the pain, talked about, you know, how it. How it felt for us, how it felt for our kids and our families and our exes and, you know, didn't. We haven't made that. It's never been a central part of our relationship.

[Sage Steele]

We were very careful. We did not want it to be that.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. Yeah. And it's a. It's a known place. We're both. We both have had a similar experience and we've learned a lot from it. Both of us personally grown from it. And, you know, I think that's. I think that shared experience is great. And also not defining, you know, for either of us, for sure.

[Sage Steele]

No. Even though I think at times when you're in it, you think it's always going to consume you and you don't want that for yourself, for them, the ex, the kids. You just don't. It's not healthy.

[Dave Barbuto]

Right.

[Sage Steele]

What's not a healthy place to be? There's just a lot in knowing you're not alone.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

In going through something like this and that someone actually understands with very similar circumstances, you know, it was. There was comfort in that. Yeah. I mean, I remember. I just don't remember what bar that was. Where were we?

[Dave Barbuto]

I want to say it's a green room. Maybe.

[Sage Steele]

I have no idea.

[Dave Barbuto]

I'd never been there before.

[Sage Steele]

We need to go back.

[Dave Barbuto]

We should. Why didn't we have the reception there? Not the reception. The afternoon.

[Sage Steele]

Yeah, I should now. I think where we chose is fine. Yeah, that's definitely a bar. Bar. Our parents would be like, why are my feet sticking to the floor?

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah, no, it is.

[Sage Steele]

It's disappointing.

[Dave Barbuto]

I feel like it's the green room.

[Sage Steele]

Yeah. But, like, so that. And wait, you were really, like, shy at the end.

[Dave Barbuto]

It's not shy.

[Sage Steele]

What do you call it?

[Dave Barbuto]

Oh, at the end.

[Sage Steele]

He goes, oh, at the end. Oh, I was shy.

[Dave Barbuto]

I didn't. I didn't. Yeah. That's fair.

[Sage Steele]

Okay.

[Dave Barbuto]

But I mean, you. You're ready. Go ahead. No, I. I wanted your number, obviously. We had this great conversation. I. I felt a connection. I could tell you felt something.

[Sage Steele]

Could you?

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

Was I not subtle enough?

[Dave Barbuto]

No. I mean, I think you were. You were appropriate.

[Sage Steele]

Was I flirty?

[Dave Barbuto]

No. No, I didn't feel like you were flirty, but I knew. I knew from what I knew about your family and who you were as a person, you weren't gonna spend two hours talking to me if you didn't have some interest. Like, I knew that you could. You could and would have been able to talk to anybody there. And instead, we were. We were pretty locked in for two hours. So that said everything I needed to know that kind of told me, okay, she has some interest.

[Sage Steele]

And then.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. So, yeah, I. At the end, I was like, well, we should keep in touch. And it was meant to be like a. Like an obvious way to say, can I have your number? But I didn't use those words.

[Sage Steele]

So use your words.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. So then you were like, well, how do you expect to do that? And I was like, okay, she. She got me.

[Sage Steele]

Good question.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah, good question. I was like, well, can I have your number? And then. And then you gave it to me. And then I was like, I wonder if this is her real number. She probably is not giving me a real number.

[Sage Steele]

You doubted after our two hours of bonding?

[Dave Barbuto]

No, not really. No, but.

[Sage Steele]

And then we hugged.

[Dave Barbuto]

We did. We did.

[Sage Steele]

As a hug.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. It was a good hug. It wasn't one of those, like, side hugs? Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

No.

[Dave Barbuto]

Or a bro hug?

[Sage Steele]

Do that.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah, it was good. Yeah, it was a good hug. And. And then. Then what happened?

[Sage Steele]

And then I got in the car.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

Uber with Katie. And she's like, girl. And I was like, I know. She's like, he's gonna text you. Oh, wait, no, I missed. I didn't say the middle part. Oh, say the middle part where you walked. No, it. I. I felt. Started to feel something in the middle of our conversation about whatever, a lot. And I suddenly got these butterflies in my stomach. And I was like, what is happening? I got really nervous. I felt like I. Yeah, I felt like I knew you were the one. I didn't. I don't think I said that in my. Like, with words, certainly not out loud, but I felt something. I'm like, what the hell is this? And so I was like, I need a drink. I'll be right back. Would you like something? And yes. You said so. I was in line. I was glad the line took a while. I looked back over, and Katie.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. She had me dead on her hips.

[Sage Steele]

And she was like, who are you? What do you want with my girl? Back the bleep up. I will take you out. Like, she was right.

[Dave Barbuto]

She was.

[Sage Steele]

And I could tell.

[Dave Barbuto]

I appreciated it.

[Sage Steele]

I couldn't hear what she was saying, but I could see her movement.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

I was like, oh, there goes Katie. My protector.

[Dave Barbuto]

Information.

[Sage Steele]

Yes. And when I came back, you had gone to the restroom.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And she.

[Dave Barbuto]

I had to. I had to. I had to escape. I was getting grilled.

[Sage Steele]

You were.

[Dave Barbuto]

It was good.

[Sage Steele]

And she looked at me with the two drinks in my hands. One for you. And she goes, you're gonna marry him. Don't fuck it up.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah, Katie.

[Sage Steele]

And I looked at her and I said, I know. And then she goes, and he's got really good shoes on. That's a good sign.

[Dave Barbuto]

I was glad I wore those shoes.

[Sage Steele]

I know. And then you came back, and I just. I feel like I was lighter. Cause I kind of was, like, it's confirmed. And she likes him.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And. Cause I'm like, okay. I've had, like, you know me, lightweight, like, one and a half drinks. I'm like, that's a lot for me.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And, yeah, it was amazing. I will never forget it. And then when we got in the Uber at the end of the night and we're going back to the hotel, she's like, he's gonna text you tonight. I go, it is two in the morning. He is absolutely not gonna text me. And she's like, okay. We get back to the Hotel ding. And I was like, oh my gosh. We both ran for the phone. And you were of course very polite. We've texted so much that I like. Is there a way to get back to the top of a text? Oh, wow.

[Dave Barbuto]

We gotta find out.

[Sage Steele]

There is.

[Dave Barbuto]

Without scrolling, Finger scrolling.

[Sage Steele]

Like this for an hour.

[Dave Barbuto]

Cheat code to get to the top of your text string or something.

[Sage Steele]

Let's do it.

[Dave Barbuto]

You have to find this out.

[Sage Steele]

Omg.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

Let's do it.

[Dave Barbuto]

I love this.

[Sage Steele]

Let's put that at the bottom of this. Like our first. And then my daughter. Once during my. My five years in between divorce and meeting you, there was one guy that I dated. Seriously. And when we had first started talking and he lived in a different state, so it was long distance. It was stupid from day one. Whatever. Oops. I don't mean stupid. But it was just. It was not gonna last. Like, I think we both knew that. But good guy. Whatever. At the beginning, I was getting ready to respond to a text that he had sent. I was sitting next to Quinn on the couch and she's like, who are you writing? And I said his name. And she's like, let me see that. I showed her. And she was like, do not send that, mom. Do not send that. And I was like, what? She's like, no. I go, don't touch it. She's like, I'm not gonna send it. But just. She's like, there now. Wait an hour. I was like, okay. She's like, you know what you're doing.

[Dave Barbuto]

These are the rules.

[Sage Steele]

Yeah, you know what you're doing.

[Dave Barbuto]

Just.

[Sage Steele]

Just, just wait for me. So this is what, three years ago? And I'm like, oh my goodness. My 20 year old daughter is like coaching me through it. So when you wrote Ding at 2:15 in the morning, I was like, do I wait an hour? Set my alarm for 3:15 so I'm not being too whatever. And now it was just so polite. And the next morning when I woke up to my mother calling me asking if I met Dave Barbuto the night before. And I was like, what?

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah, like my mom checked in with me during that evening. I wasn't looking at my phone. Obviously, we were talking the whole time. But she had texted and said, how was the event? And I was like, good, I got to meet Sage Steele. That's all I said. And then she apparently texted your mom. And then your mom apparently called you the next morning.

[Sage Steele]

And I was like, what?

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

How does my mother know?

[Dave Barbuto]

The moms. The moms, they're in the middle of all of this?

[Sage Steele]

Yes. Yes. You know, in some cultures, this would be considered like, you know, a planned.

[Dave Barbuto]

Arranged marriage or something.

[Sage Steele]

An arranged marriage? Yes. So. But I will say this because, you know, two days later, that drive from me from South Florida up to Jacksonville, and I talked to you for four to five hours, and I remember getting to my parents house and taking an extra couple laps around the block. And they're of course tracking me on, you know, whatever, gps, all times of my life, including right now.

[Dave Barbuto]

Where are you?

[Sage Steele]

Are you okay? Why are you driving? Is someone following you? I'm like, no. So I got inside and my mom immediately was like, well, what are you talking about with him? They wanted to know all the details. And she looked at me and she's like, he's a good guy. So the fact that my mother and father. To an extent, but it was more the moms that were friends, like, you'd already been vetted.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

Because when you know someone's family. When you know someone's mother.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

It's no guarantee, but it is a good indicator. A very good indicator, especially when it. When you understand the kind of family they come from, which quite often means their values, their value system.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

So that was a huge advantage. And I do think that probably sped up the process because I wasn't like, trying to dig around on social media for the skinny on you, you know. Yeah, I did do that too, though, the.

[Dave Barbuto]

Our parents.

[Sage Steele]

Scrolling.

[Dave Barbuto]

Our parents. I mean, I. I haven't asked you this, but I could. I mean, I can tell from the things you've said. And then you. You. I've shared with you what my parents have said. Like, they. They knew early on. Just like we did. Like, they just knew. I mean, I remember telling my mom a couple weeks in. I'm like, I'm gonna marry her. And she's like. She's like, yeah, I know you are. She's like, I understand. And I agree. And like. And my dad. Yeah. And my dad has said it probably two or three different times. He's like, you guys are just perfect for each other. You just. You just fit. And they love you, they adore you, they think you're great.

[Sage Steele]

Was this before?

[Dave Barbuto]

It was after the cookies. It was after you made the cookies. That's when I think you really won them over. It's the Christmas cookies that you made.

[Sage Steele]

Yes, it's a. Cookies, which. That was until the end of January, Dave. So that this timeline does not add up.

[Dave Barbuto]

No, I'm saying they knew early on. But, like, when You. You sealed the deal with the cookies because it took like. It was like five hours in the kitchen. You were working on this.

[Sage Steele]

I was slaving over these cookies. Best cookies ever.

[Dave Barbuto]

But they were amazing.

[Sage Steele]

They were best ever. But now the bar is very high for every holiday season. But I was gonna say to you when you said you knew a couple weeks in November 12th is when we met. We didn't see each other again until December 11th. December 12th, like a month to the.

[Dave Barbuto]

Day, every night on the phone.

[Sage Steele]

So my point is, you kind of knew before we actually saw each other in person again.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yes. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I. I knew it was wildly different than anything I had ever had before and been involved in before. The second night, we talked, like, on your drive to Jacksonville. But a couple weeks in, I remember talking to my mom and just going like, she's the one. And she was like, yeah, yeah. And then you came into town, and we had our first real date at Whole Foods. It was at Whole Foods. We had to get groceries. We had to get groceries so we could make dinner.

[Sage Steele]

I was really nervous at Whole Foods. I was so nervous because I'm trying to remember what I was wearing. It was cold here, and I.

[Dave Barbuto]

You know, you had jeans on, and then you had that bluish gray jacket, like the button up.

[Sage Steele]

Yes, yes, yes.

[Dave Barbuto]

Big overcoat.

[Sage Steele]

It's not an overcoat, but it was. It's that velvety thing from aloe that I love. If you ever see any color in it, please buy it all. I want all the colors of that. And we were walking, but I remember I peeled off to go get. Do we have a salad that I go get some arugula or something? And then you're, like, self conscious. I'm like, okay, how am I walking? Am I, you know, am I going to trip and fall? Oh, my goodness. And I turned back to come towards you to the cart, and you were looking at me, and I was like, oh, gosh. Oh, gosh. Oh, gosh. Like, I was very nervous. I remember we were looking to make. Did we have enough utensils in your Airbnb condo that I was using? You were nice enough to offer me to use. Offer me the condo to use so I didn't have to get a hotel. And so we were able to come back and cook. And gosh, you're a good cook. That helps too. No, I just remember being really, really nervous. And then the next night, went to dinner at Adele's in downtown Nashville, which is where our rehearsal dinner is, which is so cool. And Full circle. Because that was the first, like, date, date.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah, yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And everything we're doing for this wedding is tied back to how this relationship began.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's gonna be. It's gonna be so much fun. And.

[Sage Steele]

Are you nervous?

[Dave Barbuto]

No, I'm not nervous. I'm excited. I'm excited. I want to make sure that there's so many people you want to meet, things you want to say to people. You know, saying our vows, like, there's things that we have to do that are. That could be nerve wracking. But I'm not nervous. You know, I'm excited. Who do you think is going to be the biggest mess at the wedding besides you?

[Sage Steele]

You?

[Dave Barbuto]

No, no, sir.

[Sage Steele]

No, sir. I think you're going to be very emotional.

[Dave Barbuto]

That's probably true.

[Sage Steele]

I don't know why I'm even hiring a makeup artist. I don't know why. Because it's all going to be cried off before I even see you, I think. Yeah. I mean, I will be the biggest disaster, like, the top 10 people. It's all my name, I think, you know, with. With my parents. So. Because I was afraid that, like, I didn't ever want to hurry. I was like, I know God had a plan and, like, I want to meet someone to share the rest of my life with, but I don't want to rush it because it's in God's timing. Right. But I admit to being very scared that my parents, who have obviously been there from day one, that my parents who have lifted my butt off the ground, literally and figuratively, especially these last few years before I met you, and been crying and angry and happy and sad with me, I was like, you know, they're older and are they going to be here to witness this someday? That was my biggest fear. And so to be able to, yes. Have them there and for my dad to walk me down the aisle again the last time, is something I didn't know I'd see or be able to experience for them as much as me. Literally for them. Because I now know that as a mother, you just want your kids happy and taken care of. And so I can't imagine how it's been for my parents the past probably decade, frankly, because parents sometimes know things before we do.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

So I'm gonna be. I. I really don't want to be there. I don't want to be, like, wiping snot. It's not cute. I've been looking for tan handkerchiefs because did you know that I'm a brown girl?

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

I Know, and so my makeup on a white handkerchief is not cute. So I'm working on that still. How much time do I have? And anyway, I'm just so. And I'm also grateful that our kids get to witness this.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. It's gonna be great.

[Sage Steele]

And that is gonna be so special and rare.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

Like, when kids have to go through the breakup of their parents. That's devastating.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And when kids get to witness a parent not just find love again, but to witness how you've treated me, how you've made me feel, how you've made them feel, and likewise.

[Dave Barbuto]

Likewise. Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

Is a blessing. And I'm excited that we're doing it the way that we're doing it. Like my three. My two girls and my son standing behind me. Your daughter and your son standing behind you. Untraditional. Whatever. Who cares? Like, we're doing it our way.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And I just. I want to be very present and to be able to look at everybody who made such an effort is making such an effort to come to town for us. As I'm walking down the aisle. But then again, I'm like, well, that's what the night before is. And that's what the night. The reception is. That's what the day after is. We're doing the whole weekend thing at that moment. I want to be there, present with my dad.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And to see you and to see my kids. It is. It is. But I. I'm just so grateful that we get to do this. And it's literally because of God bringing us here.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. I mean, you said this earlier, and it's true. There's so many reasons why this couldn't have happened or wouldn't have happened or shouldn't have. Yeah. Shouldn't have happened. And all those things just got moved out of the way. Yeah. I mean, I know we both thank God several times for that and do regularly and. Yeah. I mean, it's. I think it's reshaped my whole view on. Not reshaped my whole view on faith, but. But just reaffirmed that he is in control and he is taking care of us. And even when things are tough, he's there. And when things are great, he's there. And, you know, we've talked about it all the time. Like, how do you let go and just trust that he's gonna take care of things? And I think this is a perfect example. It's gonna be great.

[Sage Steele]

Can I say one thing? Sure.

[Dave Barbuto]

It's your show.

[Sage Steele]

Ten days after we met, we had a very long Conversation.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And the question you asked me is one that a man had never asked me before, and that was, what do you want in a relationship? And I. And you said, give me the top five. And I was like, oh, wow. You're like, no pressure. You can take your time. Like, it doesn't have to be tonight. And I was like, oh, no, I know them.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yep.

[Sage Steele]

Have a seat. And I said many things.

[Dave Barbuto]

You did? I wrote them down.

[Sage Steele]

Oh, my.

[Dave Barbuto]

Go ahead.

[Sage Steele]

Do you want to go in reverse order? Do you want to.

[Dave Barbuto]

No, you go ahead.

[Sage Steele]

Oh, wow. Now it's a question.

[Dave Barbuto]

No, just. I mean, the top one is the one that matters.

[Sage Steele]

Yeah. That's why I'm bringing it up. But the other things were. Why are you laughing at me?

[Dave Barbuto]

I can't wait to read these. Go ahead. Go ahead. Please. No, just share the story. Cause this is. It's important, and it's meaningful.

[Sage Steele]

They're coming to rescue you right now. So I wanted someone who's spontaneous. And I was like, if we're. Like, if I say to you, oh, my gosh, you want to go to New York City this weekend, you want to go?

[Dave Barbuto]

Yes. What was the first one, though? Sage?

[Sage Steele]

Well, I was getting there. I was building. Forget it. Forget. I guess the others aren't important to you.

[Dave Barbuto]

No, they all are.

[Sage Steele]

I started with faith.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And it was the first time that I'd ever genuinely meant that my faith had to be the number one thing that we. That I had with a partner, and that I can't do this journey by myself. I tried, and that's not the right way to do it for me. And I needed someone who was gonna walk by my side with that journey and pray with me and hold me accountable and make me better. But God has to. God was the reason why we were there in the first place, talking. That had to be it. And I remember, as I was saying it, going, well, if he doesn't like this, it's over. And I'm taking a big risk here. But what if he's on the same page with this?

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

This could be really cool. And I remember kind of being able to somehow hear your smile, like. Yeah. Even though you didn't say anything like that.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

You. You agreed, and. But that's where I was with my faith, actually. To know that, number one, I had to express the importance of it and that no matter how you reacted, I was gonna be able to handle it.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

From there. But I could never, ever again put that anywhere but first place.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. Yeah, yeah. I mean, it was it was great to hear. At first. I was. I was so impressed and excited that you knew the answer to that question. You had done your work. You knew what was important to you in a relationship. You were ready. Because if you. If you hadn't, you. You wouldn't be able to answer that on the spot, in the moment.

[Sage Steele]

And so it was a test.

[Dave Barbuto]

No, no, no. I. I mean, we were just having conversation, and it was like we had been talking for several weeks at that point.

[Sage Steele]

Maybe 10 days.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah, 10 days. And I remember thinking, like, this is really pretty serious, and we obviously like each other, and we're talking about a lot of things, like, it's important for me to know what matters to her. And so it wasn't a test, but it was. It was important. And you answered it immediately, with conviction. You knew what mattered. Can I read the rest of them? Yes, because they're so great. I want to. I actually want you to. I want to talk about how we've done on these. Oh, yeah. So number one was commitment to faith in God, and it's great. And I think we've done a really good job of that. And, you know, we have to maintain it, and I know we will, but it's certainly something that we focus on, which is great. Your number two is spontaneity. And if we haven't checked that box, I don't know.

[Sage Steele]

Oh, my gosh.

[Dave Barbuto]

I don't know how. I don't know how we could do that more. The examples in the list are long of things that we have randomly and at the last minute decided to do. But they've all been fun.

[Sage Steele]

Yes.

[Dave Barbuto]

They've all been adventurous.

[Sage Steele]

You want to jump on a plane in three hours and meet me in Washington, D.C. and go to the White House and meet the president.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. And meet the president. Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

No big deal. Like crazy.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And that's only one. There's. There's a long list, but they've been great and so much fun. The third one was. Encourages you. Someone that encouraged you. How do you think I've done there?

[Sage Steele]

You encouraged me so much. Yeah. You've given me confidence, you know, professionally, as I've tried to build this show of mine, and never having done anything like that and scared to death, Scared of failure, Scared of. Yeah. And encouraged me with parenting. Encouraged me in so many ways, and I've wanted to quit on a few things, and. Yeah. You don't. You don't let me. In a very kind way.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. I mean, you did the same for me. You know, it's having a true teammate that really wants to see you succeed and be part of it with you is, I think, what everybody searches for, and we definitely have that. You know, the fourth one was. Lifts me up and we celebrate each other.

[Sage Steele]

Is that the same?

[Dave Barbuto]

It's similar. I think it's a little different. I think it's more about, like, encouraging, like pushing, helping, supporting, but then celebrating. Was the next one celebrating each other.

[Sage Steele]

I remember saying, I need you to allow me to celebrate you like I want. I wanted to find a man, a real man, who would allow me to celebrate him, too.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

It makes me happy to celebrate your successes and things that excite you no matter what they are. And I didn't realize how important that was to me. That which is as a woman, as a wife. I was. I knew I needed that.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. Yeah. And I think, you know, your job, my job, we both have had really great growth in those jobs, and the last eight months have just continued to get better for both of our careers, like, and the things that we're focused on. And I couldn't ask for a bigger cheerleader. You've just been always so excited when I share how things are going. And I know together we've. We've watched your show grow and the things that have come from that, and so I think we've done that.

[Sage Steele]

Well, me too.

[Dave Barbuto]

Number five, physically attracted to each other.

[Sage Steele]

Did I say that?

[Dave Barbuto]

That's a slam dunk. So at least it is for me. I know.

[Sage Steele]

Did I say that?

[Dave Barbuto]

You did. But it was five. I mean. Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

No, I remember it was like 1:30 in the morning conversation. I was sitting on top of my bed. Home in Florida. You were here in Tennessee.

[Dave Barbuto]

I was in Orlando. It was a work. It was a worker meeting.

[Sage Steele]

Yeah. And then. Yeah. At some point, you're like, we're only a couple hours away. Yeah, I know. Wait a minute. But no, Yeah. I mean, listen, that's important.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

Are there other things more important? Yes, sure. But if you don't have a physical attraction to someone, I'm sorry. Like, that's where it begins. Before I found out that you were a great human being, a wonderful man, I had to, you know, in order to go deep for two hours that night at the bar on Broadway in Nashville. It's like, I didn't feel that there was something like that then, you know.

[Dave Barbuto]

You felt that way. Even though I had a black shirt with a black suit.

[Sage Steele]

I questioned you at that point. I questioned your character.

[Dave Barbuto]

You said that. But then when I showed you a Picture from that night later, you're like, oh, that did look good.

[Sage Steele]

I think it did. I don't want you to do it again. But it did look good. But you also had the. Have the physique to be able to do that and to pull that off. But it's also like, what kind of black is it?

[Dave Barbuto]

No, that's true.

[Sage Steele]

What kind of black fabric is it?

[Dave Barbuto]

That's true.

[Sage Steele]

I don't like under suits. I only like.

[Dave Barbuto]

I knew you were gonna go deep on this.

[Sage Steele]

I only like white shirts under suits. I don't like pink shirts. Black. Like, stop.

[Dave Barbuto]

This is great.

[Sage Steele]

Hate it. You looked hot that night.

[Dave Barbuto]

Number six, active and works out. That's important to you in a relationship. We. We are all about that when we're on the road, when we're at home, we put that first. Usually in the day, really do. Working out, going on walks, going in the ocean, riding bikes. Like, making it. Keeping it active.

[Sage Steele]

Need it. Our walks, especially in Florida, we've got two main paths. One is, like, 4.2 miles. The other one's seven.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

It's right along a 1A.

[Dave Barbuto]

We got to do the seven again. We haven't done it. It's been a while since we've done the seven.

[Sage Steele]

Here's what. Here's what Dave does, is we get halfway through, and it's like, okay, coffee break. We found this really cool coffee spot in this really cute little boutique hotel in Lauderdale by the sea. And. But then we'll sit and talk for, like, an hour, and I'm like, okay, we got. And then one of the last times we did it, we stopped at a bar and had beer and oysters of my cocaine.

[Dave Barbuto]

I mean, it was dinner time.

[Sage Steele]

I know.

[Dave Barbuto]

I mean, listen. But we did walk seven miles, so it's not.

[Sage Steele]

We did. Yeah. I just. Yeah. I love, love, love that. We both need that.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah, we enjoy it.

[Sage Steele]

The older I've gotten, the more I absolutely need it.

[Dave Barbuto]

And we'll always do it.

[Sage Steele]

Yeah. Oh, we will. And kick each other's butt with it too.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

You know, I will say I'll be nicer and not as annoying with making you try my peloton strength workouts.

[Dave Barbuto]

Oh, my gosh. The idea of someone yelling at me to work out, I just don't need that. That's like the army coming back.

[Sage Steele]

It's all PTSD for you.

[Dave Barbuto]

It is. That's all they did is yell at you.

[Sage Steele]

We do different workouts together.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. Yeah. And it's fun, and I think it always starts the day great.

[Sage Steele]

And we do like the same workout music.

[Dave Barbuto]

That's true. 90s hip hop.

[Sage Steele]

Yes.

[Dave Barbuto]

Top of the list. Okay. Number seven, one of my favorites. No liberals. Important in a relationship.

[Sage Steele]

I forgot I said that.

[Dave Barbuto]

So it was after God and working out and being attractive, but it was no.

[Sage Steele]

Did I say no? Effing liberals.

[Dave Barbuto]

You might have, but I cleaned it up for this. No liberals. So that was a great one.

[Sage Steele]

Oh, my gosh, I'm sorry.

[Dave Barbuto]

Drink was really hitting there.

[Sage Steele]

No, this is. No, this was the. I was at home. There was no. This is the. This is the ten day later. Yeah, not the night of it.

[Dave Barbuto]

That's right.

[Sage Steele]

I was. It's true.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah, of course.

[Sage Steele]

Because I think there's some, like, morals values that conservatives have that liberals just don't.

[Dave Barbuto]

Here we go.

[Sage Steele]

It's one thing to be a. Anyway.

[Dave Barbuto]

Well, we checked that box.

[Sage Steele]

I was like, this is safe.

[Dave Barbuto]

This is safe. Number eight, height taller than me when she's wearing heels.

[Sage Steele]

Yes. Okay. The story behind that, it isn't just about the physical part of it. It is about. For so many years when I was young, I was always the tall, awkward girl in high school, junior high, high school, and even in college. And I found I slouched a lot. And I was not. I was kind of ashamed of my height, and I can't do anything about it. But I remember slouching at ESPN one time. I had a producer come up to me because, you know, we're standing on. On our Sports center set and, like, you're head to toe, so everything you wear matters. I don't care if you are a supermodel. You have to wear heels to lengthen for the cameras. And so I had a producer come up to me once and he's like, can you not wear heels? Some of the men that you work with are little. They don't like it. And I won't name the men because I love them. They're friends of mine, but they're much shorter than me. When I don't have heels on, I'm like, so you want me to wear flats and look frumpy so he can feel better? And he's still gonna be shorter than me even if I'm in flats. And so for a minute, this is back in my pleaser days, I was like, oh, yeah. And then I was like, what the. No, absolutely not. And I'm gonna stand taller now because you're telling me to adjust. So I think because I was so self conscious for so many years and told to make myself smaller, like, it's Literally. And it's figuratively. It's in every way. When you're told to be less of you, it's. It actually hits hard.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And so I didn't want to feel that way ever again. And if I have a dress that looks best with my big girl shoes, as I call them, my four inch heels, then I don't want to not wear them. And I did that for many years. No one's fault. I'm just saying there was something visceral in me that, like, it affected me when I was told to be smaller.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

That's crazy. Like, maybe that sounds dramatic.

[Dave Barbuto]

No, I mean, I get it. I think. I think words matter and you can take them to heart in lots of different ways. But it was. You know, there's a lot of symbolism behind that in your life and your career and time at espn. So, I mean, it's meaningful to you.

[Sage Steele]

And there's something else that. I don't know. I think there's other women out there who feel this way and some who don't, and men. Like, we all have our thing. It's nothing against you, anybody. For. For me, it's also because I wanted to feel protected.

[Dave Barbuto]

That was next on your list.

[Sage Steele]

Did I say that?

[Dave Barbuto]

Number nine.

[Sage Steele]

I said that. You asked for five. How many did I give you?

[Dave Barbuto]

A nine.

[Sage Steele]

I think you could combine a couple of them.

[Dave Barbuto]

So let's say seven protects her and makes her feel safe.

[Sage Steele]

Yes. Oh, my gosh, that makes me cry. Yes. I needed to. I wanted to feel physically and emotionally protected and that I didn't have to go do it alone and to feel like I had to support myself and everybody alone.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And that I could not have to feel like I have to be so tough anymore. I got good at it. And I know that I am tough in the right ways, I think, but I don't realize. I don't think I realized how much of a barrier I had put up because I was like, nope, gotta be tough. Gotta be tough. That did not seem needy.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And that seemed like an emotional chick who needs some guy to come rescue her. Nope. I got it. I got it. I got it.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. I've never thought you needed that. You know, You've never. I've never felt like you needed a man in that way. Like you needed someone to take care of you in that way. You know, You've never given me that vibe or I've never. But it's an adjustment, right? Like, it's an adjustment when you are alone and you are doing everything and then you're with someone and you don't have to do it all, and it's different.

[Sage Steele]

What I realized is that you wanted to be that person for me.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And I. It's actually as incredible as it's been, it's actually been quite an adjustment.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

Because I've had to let go of just doing it. And sometimes I'm like, why are you taking my bag? I can do this. And you're like, your backpack weighs 80 pounds. Stop it right now. And I'm like, I know. But I got it all in. It's all in there. And it's been an adjustment for me to, like. I haven't open. Opened a single door since we met, whether it's of the car in particular or at a restaurant anywhere. And at first I was like, I don't want you to feel like you have to do that, and it's okay. You don't have to. But I realized it isn't actually. It is about me making me feel. But it was important to you to be able to be a man in that way.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And I. So I've had to learn to let go. And sometimes I get frustrated when you're taking all the bags away from me, and then I'm just walking with my coffee, and I feel like a prissy little thing. I'm like, I can do this. I can carry it. I got my suitcase.

[Dave Barbuto]

I know you're capable. Everyone knows you're capable.

[Sage Steele]

But I think I just got. That's been. How I've lived my adult life is to just. And no one told me to do this. Right. It just happened. And I think I did a lot of it too much on my own without anyone telling me to. To a fault. But then no one told me to stop, and no one said, yeah, you don't have to do that alone. And so now I am living that, and my girls are seeing that. And that is priceless. For them to see me taken care of in certain ways while still being a boss in other ways is my attempt to, like, lead them and guide them as a mom boss. And now I'm getting to be a friend slash boss. And I say boss lately, like, not boss boss. With Quinn, who's 23 now, I always heard about what it's like to have your kids as friends when they. You no longer have to be as much of a parent. But they are witnessing you caring for me in those ways. And I see them watching you. And then when one of Quinn's friends was here visiting a Couple weeks ago, and Hattie and Soph were visiting, and we went over to dinner, and you opened Quinn's door and their doors, and then you shut it. And Hetty goes, oh, my God, he opened your door. And Quinn goes, I haven't opened a door since I met Dave. And that hit me because her bar has been raised.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And so this. You are such a blessing in ways that it's kind of endless, you know? And my son is seeing that, too, seeing his mom taken care of in that way, and that's really cool, you know? Like, it's been an adjustment, certainly, for our kids and still will be.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

But they're seeing so much. Good. And I. I'm so glad you wrote those down. Like, I just was finally being honest for the first time.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

Like, I'm just gonna say these things that I need because I had done the workday. I finally found a couple of good therapists. One good therapist, my therapist now is, like, is. I left her a voice text today, like, crying, because she helped me do the work to get here and to be able to not just share what I know that I now need without shame and feeling like I'm being too much, but to receive it. And I'd never been able. Well, I certainly had never had the opportunity to receive what I received from you. So it takes what it takes.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. I think it's. It was a great list. It was a great list, and it. It hit me hard just because I was, like, impressed. There wasn't anything silly. It was meaningful, and it was specific, and it spoke to me. I mean, as I heard you say, each one, and I was writing them down, I thought, yeah, like, these are great, and I can be this. I can do this, and I want to do this. You've been a great influence, obviously, on me personally, but, like, and my kids and my family and my friends, everybody that's met you, you know, has always commented on how nice you are and kind you are and how authentic you are. And, I mean, I've told you a million times that I'm proud of you. That's what I'm most proud of you about, is just that the people that are close to me that have met you see you the same way I see you. You know, that's really, really important. And that's how they see you, which.

[Sage Steele]

Means so much because they've known you longer than I have.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And they love you and should be protective of you and have been.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. For sure.

[Sage Steele]

And I also know that at this point in Our lives. If we're not just our genuine, authentic selves, then it's just not.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah, what are we doing?

[Sage Steele]

And so I'm like, okay, this is it. And. But I. I never doubted it, that they wouldn't like me. Only because I just felt like it was bigger than us. Right. And that we were. We were supposed to be here. And the rest will figure itself out. You know, there's been. It hasn't been fully, you know, smooth in every way. And there's friendships that are affected, and there's some family here and there because they're like, what are you doing? Slow down.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And I appreciate it, and I know you do, too. It's just out of love. But.

[Dave Barbuto]

But.

[Sage Steele]

Again, like, we've. What. What I think we've done best, besides the obvious things, is we've let go of control and we just went with it and trusted God. And trust. Which therefore made me trust you.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

So people can question it all they want, and they have, and I don't care. Yeah, obviously, we don't care. And it is through prayer, and it is through listening to my heart and my soul and asking you a million questions and you asking me a million questions and just trying it.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And then when you know, you know, I know it's an old cliche, but it's kind of true. I didn't realize it until you. And now here we are. It's imperfect. Perfectly imperfect.

[Dave Barbuto]

The concept of seasons, we've talked about a lot. Seasons of our life, seasons of friendships, careers, you know, all sorts of things. And I think we both have come to realize that sometimes when those seasons end, it's hard. It's just difficult. And, you know, you don't anticipate them usually, and you don't want them to happen, but when they happen, being able to recognize them for what they are, appreciate what they were, and be open to them, you know, changing at some point because the seasons do change, then I think that's the best we can do.

[Sage Steele]

Yeah, I think so. I mean, very. Yeah. There's stuff that hurts a lot, and especially when you know you did your best, even if it didn't feel that way to them. Hopefully. What people always keep in mind with us, with each other, when you know someone's heart, hopefully that trumps everything.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

Even if they are imperfect in whatever other way. And when someone chooses to forget that. Okay. Like, you can't control that.

[Dave Barbuto]

Can't.

[Sage Steele]

And maybe it changes later. But no matter what, I am grateful for all the relationships, the friendships, the good, the Bad. The up and down, ugly, whatever. Because it took all of it to get to here.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

This wedding is a celebration of that.

[Dave Barbuto]

It's gonna be quite the party.

[Sage Steele]

It is. It's a celebration, though, of so many people who have stood by our side and picked us up and punched us when we needed it, you know?

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And cried with us when we needed it and laughed at us when we deserved that, too, which is a lot for me. I deserve to be laughed at a lot. And I can laugh at myself about it, too. Like, I deserve it, but, like, I don't know. This has happened this way for a reason. There are things I wonder about and I'm sad about. I wish we could have had children together. And as I say to people who ask, I'm like, girlfriend, we are. I'm all dried up. It is impossible. There is nothing. There's no eggies left. It's gone. Been gone for years. Over. Hopefully, in our next life, Dave, because we would have had really tall, cute kids with curly hair, and hopefully they would have gotten your green eyes and. Oh, my God, crushing it next time. Our next life. I do feel sad at times that we didn't get to do more of those things together, like, with our family. I struggled with that sometimes, but I also wouldn't change it.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

We have our babies. We have amazing kids, beautiful lives that we're bringing together. But, like, I just. I want. I know our kids are seeing it. Our parents are loving this, and we get to celebrate all of this with them. That's what this is.

[Dave Barbuto]

I know.

[Sage Steele]

And remember, we're like, okay, I'm 52. You're 49. Like, do we really need to blow this thing out? No. Do we need to spend all this money? No. This is stupid. We can go to some destination wedding and go get married on the beach and have a party later. Like, and then we're like, why not just have a big old party to thank all these people?

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And that's what we get to do. We're very blessed that we can do it.

[Dave Barbuto]

I know.

[Sage Steele]

And it's a thank you. I hope people feel that. It's a thank you.

[Dave Barbuto]

I think they will. I think people recognize. They'll recognize that this is. Yeah. It's about our day, but it's about all of them and the roles they played in our lives. You know, I hope the kids. I know the kids will have fun. I hope they. I hope they do appreciate what. What it is. And just the idea we've talked about. Like, you don't Commonly get to see that. And, you know, I think. I think they will. I think they already do in some respects. But the actual wedding itself, and like we were talking about, I don't. I can't remember a wedding. My kids went. The last one was my brother's wedding. And they've certainly never.

[Sage Steele]

They were little.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. And they weren't part of a wedding. So to be such an important part of this will be really special. And I'm glad it's. I'm glad we're getting to give that to them.

[Sage Steele]

Yeah.

[Dave Barbuto]

You know, if we'd have done something else, they wouldn't have had that experience.

[Sage Steele]

You are crushing this, by the way. Not today. I mean that too.

[Dave Barbuto]

Thanks.

[Sage Steele]

The wedding. I just want everybody to know, like, the amount of work you've done is insane. And the way you've kept me on task is also incredible. I have some guilt about that. About kind of getting scattered and being. I don't know they've ever been overwhelmed with this process. It's the combination of.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. It's just a lot.

[Sage Steele]

Living on the road for work.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

Trying to build the network. Oh, by the way, you have a very time consuming, big job that you love too. While we're trying to plan a wedding for 200 people and manage parenting and parents, college, everything. Oh, my gosh. And living in different places. What you have done. I have never seen a man more involved in anything through all my friends and like, never.

[Dave Barbuto]

And things we should have work to do. You said stuff we gotta get done.

[Sage Steele]

We do. I don't know if we're sleeping between now, the next 48 hours.

[Dave Barbuto]

We have to get to sleep tonight.

[Sage Steele]

I know. I know I always say sleep when you die, but now I feel like I'm gonna die, so I need to sleep.

[Dave Barbuto]

Sleep. See, don't die.

[Sage Steele]

Sleep so I don't die. Listen, we're spending all this money we need to, like, party and have fun for a few years.

[Dave Barbuto]

Imagine if you're so tired that we can't, like, fall asleep at the wedding.

[Sage Steele]

But again, I need to emphasize, like, thank you so much for all that you've done.

[Dave Barbuto]

Thank me, babe.

[Sage Steele]

And for letting me have my little vision with, you know, you.

[Dave Barbuto]

I mean, you. From the. Not from the beginning. I mean, it has evolved. But you have built just, I think, such an incredible three days. Like just the ideas that you have. Okay. But you, you are the visionary in this. And you've. You've crushed it that.

[Sage Steele]

Your execution of it and communication. Because sometimes the best communicators with Microphones aren't the best communicators in other ways. Yeah, and I. I have a long list of things to work on. Do you realize. Do you realize that I'm still like a work in progress? Do you know that?

[Dave Barbuto]

I told you you're perfect for me? You're perfect for me. So. All right, we're gonna do two things. That one you're familiar with, one you're probably less familiar. Well, I guess you're familiar with both of them. The first one is you get to ask me any two questions you want about anything.

[Sage Steele]

Okay, you have had all this time to think about it and then you're putting me on the spot.

[Dave Barbuto]

This is what you did for a living, is roll with the punches and ask questions live. So start thinking about that. And then we're gonna do word association. You've picked this little thing up and I have a handful of people and things that I want to ask you about. And I am gonna hold you to one word answers. Then you can explain the answer if you want, but you have to give just a one word answer.

[Sage Steele]

Yeah, I haven't done a good job holding my guests to one word.

[Dave Barbuto]

When you ask people this question, they just immediately start talking and then.

[Sage Steele]

And I don't stop them.

[Dave Barbuto]

It's not a word association. Okay, so which do you want to do first, my love?

[Sage Steele]

No, you're in control. Which one do you want me to do first?

[Dave Barbuto]

I want you to ask your questions first, then we'll go two or one, Whatever.

[Sage Steele]

What is your favorite memory that we have created over the last nine and a half months?

[Dave Barbuto]

Jeez. Yeah, like you haven't been thinking about this. You haven't been thinking about this.

[Sage Steele]

I have not been thinking about this.

[Dave Barbuto]

Oh, wow. I have. I mean, there, honestly. And this is not cliche.

[Sage Steele]

It can't be. The moment we got engaged.

[Dave Barbuto]

No, no, no. I mean, that was awesome. Gosh. Favorite memory. It's probably when you drove me to Key Largo. So when? Right after we. When I came to Florida after Christmas and I was going to do that bike ride from Key Largo to Key West. You and I drove from your parents house, stopped at your condo so you could show it to me, and then we drove the rest of the way to Key Largo and we talked to Courtney on the phone and we just talked the whole time about, you know, so many things, but it was middle of the night, you know, we didn't get there till 10 or 11 o' clock at night.

[Sage Steele]

Then you had to put your bike together.

[Dave Barbuto]

I had to put my bike together. So we were in that crappy Airbnb that I rented.

[Sage Steele]

I will say, was it an Airbnb?

[Dave Barbuto]

I don't know what it was.

[Sage Steele]

It was a roach motel.

[Dave Barbuto]

It was bad.

[Sage Steele]

It was a good start.

[Dave Barbuto]

When I started playing this out, I didn't know that you would be there, so I was sort of like, I can sleep anywhere. Slept on the ground for years. Like, I can sleep anywhere, but it was a crappy hotel.

[Sage Steele]

You always say, hey, from your time serving in Iraq.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

Like, hey, I have a bet I'm not getting shot at. So that was persuasive. And I'm like, okay, true, there's no bullets flying here, but there could be. Yeah.

[Dave Barbuto]

It was a rough. It was a sketchy place. But we sat there, we got there, and it was probably 10 or 10:30. And I told you, I was like, I haven't put this bike together in a while. Like, you may see some frustration. Do you remember this? I was like, it could be frustrating. I was starving. You got food, and you just sat on the couch and watched me put it together. And it was probably midnight before I finished it. It was just such a cool, simple thing. Yeah. But you. You know, I really wanted to do that. You knew I really wanted to do that. And I loved that you wanted to be a part of it, especially the beginning. And it was so cool to have you there before I left the next day and started writing. And I just loved it. It was great. Yeah, it was really great.

[Sage Steele]

I loved that moment, too. And I also loved you riding your bike for those next few days.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And it was really. I was excited for you. I was happy. I was. You know, I taught you what it meant to share your location. Fortunately, you haven't stopped sharing since then, or else we might not be here right now.

[Dave Barbuto]

I wouldn't.

[Sage Steele]

And it was really cool for me to have someone to worry about again, to care about and to worry about and to track and, like, praying as you went over that one bridge. What was that bridge?

[Dave Barbuto]

Seven mile bridge.

[Sage Steele]

I was so worried. I was praying the whole time. So it was cool to. To have someone to care about again.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

Yeah. Roach motel. Yeah. Love that. My second question. Do you want that now?

[Dave Barbuto]

Sure. Yeah. If you have two.

[Sage Steele]

What is your greatest hope for the next 38 and a half years?

[Dave Barbuto]

Oh, wow.

[Sage Steele]

There's a. There's a backstory to 38 and a half years, but no one needs to know.

[Dave Barbuto]

My greatest hope for us. For us, honestly. It's just that our kids get to Participate in the love that we have for each other. And they get to enjoy us together, whether all five of them are together with us or different pockets every time we're with them. You and me with one of mine, me and you with one of yours, or us with all of them. I just. I love it. Yeah. So I just want more of those moments. Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

When we were growing up, and to this day, my dad, he might say this in his speech at the ceremony, my dad said. Would always say, kids, this is a moment to remember. And we would roll our eyes. And now I'm like, we need to keep creating moments to remember. And I think. I think we've already done that. And we'll continue to do that, starting with.

[Dave Barbuto]

Tomorrow.

[Sage Steele]

Tomorrow. The ceremony on Friday, and every day after that. These are important moments for them to see, even the ones that aren't always fun or perfect.

[Dave Barbuto]

I mean, you've taught me a lot about appreciating and enjoying the moments. I think you're better at that than I am. Just appreciating it when you're in it. And, I mean, I want to get better at that. I think. I think I do decent. But I would like to get a lot better at that. So. Yeah. It's good questions. Where did you go to journalism school? How did you learn this? Okay. Word association.

[Sage Steele]

Yeah.

[Dave Barbuto]

And you can't. You can't.

[Sage Steele]

Okay. One word, Doc.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. Oh, we're gonna start. We're gonna start with the easy ones first.

[Sage Steele]

Okay.

[Dave Barbuto]

Quinn Bailey.

[Sage Steele]

Fabulous. Spectacular. Incredible. Hysterical.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yes.

[Sage Steele]

Spirit animal.

[Dave Barbuto]

Okay.

[Sage Steele]

Quinn. Firstborn. Baby girl. Fabulous.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. Colonel Steele.

[Sage Steele]

He's my person, but he's like my rock. He's my protector. I'll say. He's my first love. How about that?

[Dave Barbuto]

Love it.

[Sage Steele]

He's my first love.

[Dave Barbuto]

Y.

[Sage Steele]

On my 16th birthday, he sent roses to the house. I thought they're from this boy who I loved. Even though he'd never talked to me in my life, I was convinced they were from Reggie Long in Colorado Springs. He didn't know my name. And I opened it up, and I was like. And my dad looked over at me and he said, I wanted to be the first man to ever send you flowers. My dad's my first love.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. I love that. Nicholas.

[Sage Steele]

Oh, my Nicholas. This is very hard because there's so many adjectives to describe the people that you love, you know?

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

My Nicholas is my. The kindest soul. He's got the kindest soul of anyone I know.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And he's strong and. What's that word? Intuitive.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. He is.

[Sage Steele]

And he's. He's an incredible young man. And the way he's become a man. I'm so impressed. I'm so proud of the man he is today at 21. And the man he will be for his wife someday, Whoever that is. A lucky girl. And I will cut a woman who hurts him. I will come after you. I'll go to jail. He doesn't need my help. But that young man. Everything.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. Mona Steele. You knew this was coming.

[Sage Steele]

I did. I think. I think my mom is actually my true rock. And her strength that she's shown from day one. Mona. Mom is my rock. And a funny, tough exterior. And she is a wuss deep down. But you just. You'll never see it. She will cut someone who hurts me.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And has. Yeah. My mom is. I think we have best friends from different aspects of life. You are my best friend. My oldest daughter right now. Quinn is my best friend. And I know I'm gonna convince Evan to be my best friend someday, too.

[Dave Barbuto]

She's 19.

[Sage Steele]

We're getting there. I'm gonna make her be my best friend and my mom.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

Best friend.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. For sure. Evan.

[Sage Steele]

Evan. Lena. Oh. Physically, she's my mini me. You know? She's so principled.

[Dave Barbuto]

She is. God, justice. We talked about it.

[Sage Steele]

She's so principled. With a beautiful heart that she tries to hide.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And again, a caring soul. She's a great friend to people.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And tough as nails.

[Dave Barbuto]

She is.

[Sage Steele]

Yeah. If she's not an attorney.

[Dave Barbuto]

I know.

[Sage Steele]

Someday. What a waste. She'd be great sometimes. Even when I know that she's wrong and I know I'm right, she'll make a point. And I'm like. Yeah. Can you give me a minute, Evan? I'll be right back. Think about this one. I'm like, you're wrong. But I get it now. Just go away. Just let me think about this, and I'm gonna come back with a really good response in five minutes.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. She's sharp.

[Sage Steele]

She's also a beautiful soul. And I think. I think all three of my kids, like, they get me now. Now, they're not supposed to when they're young. I know. My kids know that I've tried to do the right thing in every aspect. And I haven't always, you know, I've failed at times, but they get me. They respect me.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And they love me. And I think they're all protective of me.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And that's why they love you, because they know that you're gonna protect me.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

So they're just. They are the reason why I know that I would never change anything on this journey, even though I would have. I'm sad I didn't get to do life with you earlier. They're the reason why I know I was right where I was supposed to be.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yes. Absolutely.

[Sage Steele]

And they are the best. They are the thing I'm the most proud of.

[Dave Barbuto]

They're great.

[Sage Steele]

Yeah.

[Dave Barbuto]

November 12th.

[Sage Steele]

Yeah. The day my life changed forever. So grateful for November 12th. And that God allowed me to be open in my heart enough to see you more than the hot, sexy man you are. To see you. To see your heart through just that one conversation.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

Yeah. My. My life changed that night, and I knew it. But to think of where we are today. Yeah. That wasn't one word.

[Dave Barbuto]

It's been the most peaceful 10 months of my life. Probably.

[Sage Steele]

That's a lie. Peaceful is not the way.

[Dave Barbuto]

I mean, chaotic is different. Chaotic is different than peaceful. Peaceful is. Chaos can just be things you have to do and places you have to go and whatever, but peaceful in that I'm with my best friend who loves me and encourages me like that. That is life changing. You know.

[Sage Steele]

I. Yeah. I didn't know it could feel this way. I didn't know. You know, you hear about it and you're like, really? Both of us have beautiful examples.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

October. My parents are married 54 years.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

Years. Coming up on 52, 53. We have the best examples. And then, gosh, look at society and the divorce rate. It's ugly. You know, you think, well, maybe that's just back how. How it was back in the day. Like, I didn't know this existed. And I'm just so grateful that you have. You've been so patient with me when I didn't. Like, I didn't. I didn't think I deserved that. I didn't say that out loud. I just was like, I know I'm a lot. I know my life is a lot. I know not everybody. Like, I hadn't been around people who were proud to stand by my side even when it got. Or especially when it got a little uncomfortable for whatever reason, publicly. Yeah. Even before it got controversial.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

And I got really used to being alone, which is a good quality.

[Dave Barbuto]

Sure.

[Sage Steele]

You don't need to always be with someone, but I just thought, I'm a lot. I'm too much. And I understand if people don't. If a man doesn't want to go there. So I had not given up. I just had stopped looking, which is a key and your patience with me and willingness to take me as is and do all 16 of those qualities, I listed only nine to, like, buy in on that. The patience is what I'm amazed about with you because I. I don't know that I would have been as patient with me. Yeah.

[Dave Barbuto]

It's easy. I love you, so it's easy.

[Sage Steele]

Are you sure you're ready for this?

[Dave Barbuto]

I'm so ready. So ready. I have one more. You ready? Notwithstanding. Notwithstanding. Last weekend. Notre Dame.

[Sage Steele]

So stupid.

[Dave Barbuto]

Come on. It's not stupid. Stupid word association. Be careful.

[Sage Steele]

Great uniforms.

[Dave Barbuto]

Great uniforms. That's.

[Sage Steele]

I have some PTSD with Notre Dame. Okay. No, listen. I know that if. Call it off.

[Dave Barbuto]

Call it off.

[Sage Steele]

I know that if I love you, which I do, then I have to love Notre Dame.

[Dave Barbuto]

You do.

[Sage Steele]

I do. The colors are the same as my first high school. Green and blue with some gold. And we are Catholic.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. Perfect.

[Sage Steele]

You're part Irish, and I'm a quarter Irish.

[Dave Barbuto]

That's right.

[Sage Steele]

Can you tell me.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah, I know. Yeah, totally.

[Sage Steele]

Notre Dame. This. This is proof of how much I love you.

[Dave Barbuto]

That's true. That's true. So I only had. I only had a couple more questions. Do you have time?

[Sage Steele]

You got anywhere to be before Friday?

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah. So what is. What is Whitney Houston's dream?

[Sage Steele]

I hate you.

[Dave Barbuto]

Come on.

[Sage Steele]

Well, first of all, she's dead.

[Dave Barbuto]

Oh, that's weird.

[Sage Steele]

So annoying. You know what?

[Dave Barbuto]

You liked it.

[Sage Steele]

I liked what?

[Dave Barbuto]

You thought that was funny.

[Sage Steele]

It's not funny.

[Dave Barbuto]

It was funny.

[Sage Steele]

You know what else?

[Dave Barbuto]

What?

[Sage Steele]

Can you give me love for not editing that out with Dana? Because I could have. Listen, I could have edited it out.

[Dave Barbuto]

You could have. You are the most authentic and genuine person I know.

[Sage Steele]

And I. Dana still texts me once a month when another version of the clip goes viral again for the 800 millionth time. And I'm gonna say this one final time. At the beginning of the interview, I asked Dana what he was drinking, and it was one of Joe Rogan's drinks.

[Dave Barbuto]

I know.

[Sage Steele]

And that's how Joe got in my head. And I actually said, called Dana Jo at the. Towards the beginning of the interview, too. No one caught it. It's making my day. Yum, yum. We're gonna leave that alone. Yum, yum. Thanks, Joe. No, thanks, Joe.

[Dave Barbuto]

No, thanks, Joe. No.

[Sage Steele]

Then at the end, you know, you go in for the grand finale. Yeah. Like, do you understand how that felt? Do you understand how I started sweating immediately? I was like, oh, my God. Because obviously. But this is what I said to Dana and He said he understood. I call my kids the wrong name. Yeah.

[Dave Barbuto]

All the time.

[Sage Steele]

Gave birth to these humans. So, like, similar enough.

[Dave Barbuto]

It's reasonable. Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

But I to this day, still feel terrible. Even though Dana's like, he's the one that was like, I think it's badass that you left it in because you could have edited it out. I was like, no, you have to own it. You have to laugh at yourself.

[Dave Barbuto]

And then.

[Sage Steele]

Anyway, what was Whitney Houston's dream? I don't know. I will say that I tried to. When I was in. In the 80s, I would take her album covers. The one of her. It's like an orange album cover. And then there's one of her with her hair all slicked back in the white flowy. I would. Because people told me I looked like her.

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah.

[Sage Steele]

Back then. Not now, I guess. Well, she gone. But, like, I would slick my hair back and then try to. And then I want to dance with somebody. I'm like, oh, my God. So I think her dream would have been to.

[Dave Barbuto]

You don't really have to answer.

[Sage Steele]

Sit down with Dana White and ask Dana White questions on a podcast. Getting to call him Joe Rogan.

[Dave Barbuto]

I agree.

[Sage Steele]

Really? Is that all you got?

[Dave Barbuto]

No, listen, thank you for doing this. I love you so much. I'm so excited to marry you, and I am genuinely so excited to see all of our friends and family together. It's gonna be so much fun.

[Sage Steele]

So you're showing up?

[Dave Barbuto]

Yeah, I'll be there. What time is it? It's on. It's on Friday, 5 Central. Okay.

[Sage Steele]

Don't leave me at the office.

[Dave Barbuto]

I would never. I would never leave you.

[Sage Steele]

I love you with all my heart. I'm so grateful that you took a chance on me and believe in me and love me the way you do, and my babies. So thank you for this, too, because long after we're gone, our kids will see this and roll their eyes at some of it, for sure.

[Dave Barbuto]

Well, you know, they won't watch it before then, because they don't watch anything.

[Sage Steele]

They don't watch anything we do. Except if a friend calls and says, mom, what did you say about Donald Trump? Mom? Like, I'm like, just watch the show. Leave me alone. Honestly, Dave, you. You changed my life forever. And thank you for putting up with me, and thank you for loving me, and thank you for committing to the rest of your life with me. What a blessing.

[Dave Barbuto]

I can't wait.

[Sage Steele]

The list is going to grow longer, by the way.

[Dave Barbuto]

That's great. That's great.

[Sage Steele]

I love you. Thank you.

[Dave Barbuto]

Sam.