wavePod

YOU Are Your Greatest Asset | Eric Thomas - The School of Greatness | Wave AI Podcast Notes

YOU Are Your Greatest Asset | Eric Thomas

Fri Jan 02 2026

This conversation will shake you awake if you've been living on autopilot. You'll discover why the biggest obstacle between you and your dreams isn't your circumstances; it's the victim story you keep telling yourself.

Summary

Podcast Summary: The School of Greatness – "YOU Are Your Greatest Asset" with Eric Thomas

Host: Lewis Howes
Guest: Dr. Eric Thomas (ET, The Hip Hop Preacher)
Date: January 2, 2026
Episode Theme:
A deeply personal and motivational conversation with Eric Thomas about owning your value, overcoming the victim mindset, taking full responsibility for your growth, and how to activate your inner greatness—regardless of where you’re starting from.

Episode Overview

This episode reintroduces Eric Thomas (“ET the hip hop preacher”) to audiences new and old. Lewis and Eric discuss the power of shifting from blaming external circumstances to taking radical responsibility for your life. ET shares his journey from homelessness and family turmoil to becoming an internationally recognized motivational speaker and author, highlighting the practical strategies, mindset shifts, and hard-won wisdom required for true transformation.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Shift from Victim to Owner (04:10–10:09)

Eric’s Story:
Eric recounts his early life—growing up in Detroit, learning at 12 years old that the man raising him wasn’t his biological father, feeling betrayed by his mother’s secrecy, running away from home, and living in abandoned buildings.
Victim Mindset:
“Everything was about somebody else...it was like, the outside-inside theory. Everything that’s supposed to blow me up and take me to the next level is somebody else’s responsibility.” (Eric Thomas, 04:27)
Turning Point:
The hardest moment: looking in the mirror, owning his decisions, and realizing he was the common denominator.
- “The hardest thing I’ve ever done was look in the mirror and tell myself I was sorry.” (06:31)

2. The Power of Radical Responsibility (10:09–14:36)

Future Self Wisdom:
Eric describes how his older, wiser self had to “wake up” the younger version, urging him to take control, stop running from pain, and seek change.
Rock Bottom and Hope:
Rock bottom led to hope through a supportive relationship (with his now-wife DeeDee), who challenged him to better himself and follow her to college:
- “She said, when I go to college, if you don’t come with me, I’m breaking up with you.” (11:40)
- Their relationship gave him a reason to strive, even though it took him 12 years to finish college.

3. Dismantling the Outside-Inside Theory (14:04–17:04)

Comparison is Dangerous:
Eric warns against comparing your journey to others—your unique development may take longer because your purpose is different.
- “You don’t even have the right context to do that.” (14:04)
- Pulling back a “slingshot:” The further you’re pulled back, the farther you launch.

4. The Ultimate Obstacle: Yourself (16:52–22:17)

Not External Forces, But Internal Permission:
Even when circumstances are against you, the main barrier is yourself.
- “The greatest problem was I was against me.” (17:04)
You Are Your Greatest Asset:
- “Nobody ever told me I was my greatest asset.” (17:55)
- The key is activating yourself—not passively waiting for systems, teachers, or circumstances.
Examples for Young People:
The same kids failing in school teach themselves TikTok, gaming, etc.—proving they have the capacity.

“Anything you activate... it’s going to blow out. But you waiting for some teacher to teach you, when you can pick up a book, you can go online and learn on your own.” (19:55)

5. Consistency, Vision, and Investing In Yourself (24:56–27:52)

Long-Term Growth:
Lewis and Eric reflect on maintaining consistency over 10+ years, watching others burn out while they stayed the course through vision and personal investment.
- “We have to hold ourselves to that standard, otherwise it could all go away if we don’t.” (26:24)
Breakthroughs Are NOT Just for Outliers:
ET emphasizes that overcoming immense odds is possible for anyone—not just exceptions like him or Oprah.

6. Motivation vs. Discipline (28:18–32:38)

The Role of Pain:
“You’re already in pain. Get a reward for it.” (28:27)
- Don’t let your suffering be pointless; turn it into motivation for growth, not a lifelong excuse.
Taking Back the Keys:
Blaming others gives them “the keys to your life.” When you reclaim the keys, you gain responsibility and true freedom—even if it’s harder.

7. Transformative Steps for Lasting Change (36:48–43:12)

Step 1: Take Back the Keys (Responsibility)
Step 2: Become Your Own Best Friend

Get to know yourself, love yourself, and stop defining your happiness by a relationship or community.

Step 3: Find Your North Star

Discover your purpose and organize your life around it, including enjoyment and balance.
- “You have to find the thing that wakes you up at 3 o’clock or 6 o’clock or 10 o'clock...” (40:06)

8. From "Good" to "Great": Creating a Mental Rock Bottom (44:15–50:38)

Good is the Enemy of Great:
ET addresses those living “good” but not “great” lives by encouraging them to create their own rock bottom—a place where they demand more for themselves.
- “What would life look like if you did it on your terms?” (45:15)
- Don’t just be obedient or compliant. Invest in what you want, not what’s expected.
  
  “You have to understand…the top of one mountain is the bottom of the next.” (48:50)

9. Execution: Fact-Based Action vs. Feeling-Based Inaction (50:38–55:16)

Control Your Mind:
Regular meditation is key for the greats—it helps shift decisions from emotional to logical.
- “When you make emotional decisions, you get emotional consequences.” (54:25)
Practical Reframe:
ET reframes his painful childhood discovery of his birth certificate—from an emotional “betrayal” to a rational act of protection and love by his mother, if viewed without emotion.

10. Mentors & Coaching—A Non-Negotiable (55:16–59:47)

Mentorship Is Everything:
Being around big thinkers (Warren Buffett, Les Brown, Bob Proctor) changed ET’s perception of possibility.
- “Think of Michael Jordan without Phil Jackson.” (56:05)
- At higher levels, you need even more coaching to continue growing—the difference between casual followers and those being actively coached is vast.
  - “You watching me online, you getting the motivation...but you’re not getting the daily schedule, you’re not getting the analytics, you’re not getting the blueprint.” (59:23)

11. Faith, Responsibility, and Evolving Purpose (60:02–77:22)

Spiritual Foundation:
Without faith and a relationship with God (“the ultimate coach”), ET says he’d be dead; his spiritual life gave him guidance, direction, and a sense of responsibility for future generations.
Receiving as Well as Giving:
ET reveals his next evolution: after a life of serving, he’s learning to receive—letting others pour into him and being present in mutual relationships.

“Now the rest of your life, son, be in relationships where it’s mutual...There are other communities that are waiting to bless you in the way you’ve blessed others.” (68:43)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

On Accountability:

“The hardest thing I’ve ever done was look in the mirror and tell myself I was sorry.”
(Eric Thomas, 06:31)
On Self-Activation:

“I’m my greatest asset...If you don’t activate you, the environment doesn’t matter anyway.”
(18:00)
On Victim Mindset:

“The greatest problem was I was against me.”
(17:04)
On Turning Pain Into Purpose:

“You’re already in pain. Get a reward for it.”
(28:27)
On Motivation vs. Action:

“When you make emotional decisions, you get emotional consequences.”
(54:25)
On Mentorship:

“Think of Michael Jordan without Phil Jackson...Coaching is everything.”
(56:05)
On Evolving into Receiving:

“You pour it out so much. Receive. Get in these mutual relationships and get something. So that’s what I’m hearing him say.”
(68:43)

Essential Timestamps

| Segment | Time | |---------------------------------------|-----------| | Early struggles & the victim mindset | 04:10–10:09 | | Accountability and apologizing to self| 06:35–07:03 | | Finding hope through DeeDee | 10:42–13:21 | | Dangers of comparison | 14:04–14:36 | | You are your greatest asset | 17:55–18:38 | | Turning pain into reward | 28:27–30:04 | | Taking back the keys to your life | 32:38–34:37 | | Three-pronged approach to growth | 36:48–43:12 | | Achieving greatness, not just goodness| 44:15–50:38 | | Emotional vs. fact-based execution | 51:26–55:16 | | The necessity of mentorship | 55:16–59:47 | | Spiritual guidance & responsibility | 60:02–64:04 | | Learning to receive | 68:13–71:00 | | Three Truths and definition of greatness | 73:00–77:22 |

Eric Thomas’s Three Truths (73:00–75:41)

Unplug from everyone and connect with your creator.
Find and honor love, especially healthy relationships.
Love beyond your “little pocket”—travel, meet people different from you, recognize the richness of the human experience.

Definition of Greatness (75:47–77:32)

“Greatness is fulfilling the purpose of the manufacturer...The Creator getting everything out of you, not just you.”

Overall Tone & Takeaway

Eric Thomas is both deeply introspective and direct—combining fiery motivation with lived humility. The conversation is raw, vulnerable, and peppered with memorable storytelling. The central message: no matter your circumstances, you can only become great by taking ownership of yourself and your future—with faith, consistency, mentorship, and a relentless commitment to growing the version of yourself the world needs now.

Listen if you

Need a push to take responsibility for your life
Struggle with comparing yourself to others
Want actionable wisdom on motivation, discipline, and long-term consistency
Are seeking inspiration to turn pain into purpose

Key takeaway: “You are your greatest asset. Invest in you first, and everything else can change.”

Loading summary...

Transcript

Advertisement Voice (0:00)

Saving on your education should be a.

Eric Thomas (0:02)

Right, not a competition.

Advertisement Voice (0:04)

At University of Phoenix, you'll get the best scholarship or savings you qualify for.

Eric Thomas (0:08)

Simple as that.

Advertisement Voice (0:10)

Explore scholarship options at University of Phoenix. Did you know 39% of teen drivers admit to texting while driving. Even scarier, those who text are more likely to speed and run red lights. Shockingly, 94% know it's dangerous, but do it anyway. As a parent, you can't always be in the car, but you can stay connected to their safety. With Greenlight Infinity's driving reports, monitor their driving habits, see if they're using their phone, speeding, and more. These reports provide real data for meaningful conversations about safety. Plus, with weekly updates, you can track their progress over time. Help keep your teens safe. Sign up for Greenlight Infinity@Greenlight.com podcast DSW's semi annual sale is back. Take 50% off all clearance shoes in stores for a limited time. Literally every single clearance item at your designer shoe warehouse store is on sale right now. Sneakers, boots, dress shoes, if they're on the clearance racks, they're 50% off.

Eric Thomas (1:03)

So what are you waiting for?

Advertisement Voice (1:04)

Don't sleep on these savings. Get to DSW asap. It's all or nothing, people. Shop the DSW semi annual sale today.

Lewis Howes (1:15)

Welcome back, everyone, to the School of Greatness. Very excited about our guest. If you want to succeed as bad as you want to breathe, then you'll be successful. We've got ET the hip hop preacher in the house. My man, welcome back. It's in a while.

Eric Thomas (1:29)

It's been a minute. I gotta say this. Congratulations, man. You know I was saying when I was talking to you, it's like 10 years ago, you know, and I, I remember because you were like, e, I want you on the show. And I hadn't really started doing podcasts then, so that was like one of the first podcasts. And I was like, but my mother, my godmother was dying of cancer. And so I was like, man, I can't leave and go, but I definitely wanna. And you were gracious enough, like, where you at? Eat? I was like, embassy Suites.

Lewis Howes (1:59)

I, like, drove out there. Yeah. I was like, let's do this.

Eric Thomas (4:27)

Yeah. So I'd say it's the mindset, like, I had a victim mindset. You know, it was my mom got pregnant at 17. You know, my biological father wasn't in my life. You know, I didn't go to the best schools in Detroit. You know, I wasn't in this environment. I didn't have, like, everything was about somebody else. You know, it was like the outside inside theory. You know what I'm saying? Which is terrible. It's like everything that's supposed to blow me up and take me to the next level is somebody else's responsibility. Like, it's something that is going to happen or somebody, and it's going to. And it was like, yo, E. Like, why are you in this abandoned building? Like, your mom's not here. Your biological father, no, he's not in your life, but he didn't get pulled over by the police officer. And the police officer doesn't know the counselor or the principal that kick you out. It's like. But there's a common denominator here. There's a common denominator. And you homeless. Your mom's not homeless. Your biological father's probably married with a family somewhere. Like, yo, is that right or wrong? Who cares? You are living in this abandoned building. High school dropout, you're on your way to. And so when I look back, all the anger and the frustration and the hurt, it was all blaming. Everything was about this person or that person or this person. Nothing had anything. I never even realized I was where I was because of who I was. And I was actually getting the physical manifestations of my thoughts, of my feelings, my emotions. Like, I was creating this and didn't even realize. I thought my mom created it. I thought my father created it. It was like, no, E, you created this. And I'm gonna tell you the moment I realized, you are the greatest common denominator. You probably the least greatest. Like you, the common denominator. Once that realization hit me, it was like, oh, okay, you got some confessing to do, bro. And I'm gonna tell you the hardest thing that I've ever done. Somebody asked me the other day, like, that's one of the hardest things you ever done. The hardest thing I've ever done was look in the mirror and tell myself I was sorry. That was the hardest thing.

Eric Thomas (7:04)

Didn't even know he was My father, I'm with his mother, my grandma and me like this. I'm with his sisters, I'm with his brothers, my aunts and uncles. I'm hanging out with them every day. And so the realization of, like, yo, not only did you get lied to, like, it's been manipulative, it's been deceitful, but what do I do? House. I run away from home at 12, and I'm living in garages and living in my friends homes. And this vicious cycle of every time something goes wrong or every time, you know, I'm confronted by this reality that's not. Your father is run away from home. Is run away from home. And at 16, it's like, okay, Ma, you just flat out lied to me. Everybody told me you lied. You keep telling me you didn't lie. You go tell me, when I got older, I'm like, I'm out. But it's like, e, when I looked in the mirror, it's like, why did you have to take. Why did you have to leave your mom? You had counselors. Why? When you sat down with a counselor and they tried to walk you through the tools and the strategies to get on the other side of this, why were you in. Don't talk to me. You ain't my mom. Don't talk to me. You ain't my daddy. Don't talk to me. I don't want to talk to y'. All. These are professional counselors who are saying, yo, we get it. You're going through a lot, but we're here to help. I don't want counselors at school. Principals, teachers. I'm just now insubordinate. I'm evil, rude, mean man. And I looked at myself in the mirror, was like, why was that the choice? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. You got to talk to me. I know why you made the choice, but why did you make that choice? We know what the choice was. You run away from home, you always were from conflict. You always blame somebody. But why? And the reason why is because it was easier to put it on my mom and my dad than for me to have to do the work. And so then. So the Eric Thomas that. You've seen the NFL, NBA commercials, whatever that dude is, the dude that looked himself in the mirror was like, yo, you owe yourself an apology. And not only that, you owe yourself. Correction. You owe yourself change. Wow. You need to be taught. You need to be trained. You need to become a better human. And that was one of the most difficult days of my life. Was looking at myself, correcting myself, telling myself I was sorry, and then moving forward, saying, now what are we going to do from this point? So the growth you said is the response to, are you repentful, meaning you're about to change or are you sorry? And I'm like, no, I'm not sorry. I want to repent and I want a better version of me because I should. What 16 year old should be living in abandoned buildings, eating out of trash cans? Like, that's not. It's not healthy. 1. It's not safe in Detroit to be in abandoned buildings, walking. It's not safe. And I put myself in so many situations where guns were pulled out on me, you know, people would break into the abandoned building and take my belongings from me. It's like, e, what are you doing? Like, come on, bro. This version of me had gone all the way and was like, if you don't. If you don't stop. Wow. And so, yeah, that's. I'm glad you did, because like I said, I don't talk about that anymore.

Eric Thomas (30:04)

My wife was like, I want to work out. My son was like, I didn't even know. She was like, I'm going to play basketball. I'm like, I can't do it right now. And I'm listening to a voice. He came home, heard the basketball, went out with his mom. I'm like, yo, my son, 29 years old, is spending time with his mom. As an adult male, he could be anywhere, doing anything. He's with his mom, her firstborn. They got this bond that I don't have. And they're out here hoping. And as I look at the property, I'm like, yo, what if the 16 year old Eric Thomas would have stayed the 16 year old Eric Thomas? So I'm saying for those who are listening, get a reward for it. And then do me a favor, don't just think about you. Like, do you know that my son, in his mind, this is where you. Like this where you start. Like, he got the sauna, the pool, the whirlpool. He's starting somewhere I never started. The cars, the Rolls Royce, the Escalade. Like he started somewhere I didn't start. Why? Because I didn't stop where I started. I didn't stop. I was like, okay, this is where we started. But this not about to be my end. And so his. His beginnings look to my man. Went to Michigan State and was a general manager for Izzo. He traveled the world. He's got a Final Four ring, an Elite 8 ring. He's got the. He got the jack. He sat under Coach Izzo, hall of Fame coach for four years. Coach OG he sat under these guys. Like, his boys. Some of his boys went to the league. There's some of them still in the league. Like, he got that. Because I didn't go. I quit. Cause my mom, my dad did. So I quit. I give up. This is worst thing ever happened. I was like, you get a reward for it. And so to see my son. I'm coming to a concert tonight with my daughter. Listen to me. Like, I didn't give up. And so I'm saying to everybody, we all go through pain. Some of us go through pain, and it becomes our tombstone. Some of us go through pain, and it's a scar, and we live a life of reward. So I'm just going to say again, 20, 25, do me a favor. Check you. So you're in the ballot box and you looking at all these options. Doctor, lawyer, teacher, whatever you see president, mayor, governor. Do me a favor. Before you check off any of that S&P 500 real estate. Before you check any of that. Check you. Yeah, before you check anything, check you. And go look yourself in the mirror and go, yo, I'm my lottery ticket. I'm my ticket out of the neighborhood. Or, you know, I'm the broken curse. Like, whatever you want to call yourself. But the day I stopped saying my mom, my dad, this person, the police, the. The day I stopped doing that, the day I said you.

Eric Thomas (34:43)

He ain't got the same drive I got. And that drive came without some stuff that I lack. That stuff came from lack. And so I say to anybody, you gotta. You gotta understand, it could go either way. But when you take the. You take the. It's like I walk into a school and I ask, how many of y' all 50 kids? How many kids in here, A thousand kids? How many of your dads weren't in your life, was not living in a house? 90% raised their hand, and guess what? I automatically can relate to them. That's the je ne sais quoi that my daddy wasn't there. That's the it factor. If my father had been there, I might not be able to go in here and relate or my videos that Go viral. People are like, okay, maybe if I just had Eric voice or if I just scream and I just look at it. Yeah, yeah, bro. That's not what it is. It's when I speak, you hear it. Because I've been through what you've been through. And so you recognize that voice. You recognize the pain, you recognize the struggle, but you recognize I overcame it. And that's why you, like, I want to rock with this dude, because this one ain't some kind of way. Eric ain't the one that's making us feel like, oh, it's okay that you went through this, and it's okay that this. And it's okay if you don't want to grow, and it's okay, and you don't want. No. What you hear from me is a coach that's saying, jordan, you got six rings in you, but you got to stop playing this way, and you got to start playing this way. Kobe, you got great, but you gotta. You gotta do it this way. Serena, you gotta. Venus, you gotta. Richard Williams is saying he not out there, Just good job. He's teaching training, but he's also correcting. And so for me, they hear my voice. I'm not letting you get away with murder, because greatness is in you. The greatness is in you. And now it's time to go to school, it's time to go to work and bring that greatness out of you. So, yes, anybody, anybody could be successful. But as long as you're playing the blame game, you have. You have given permission, the license, registration, the keys, you give it all over to somebody else. And the day you take it is the day that you can start deciding which direction you want to go. Wow.

Eric Thomas (40:06)

They don't necessarily have a individual purpose. Like they felt like they were called to help us with, serve our mission. That's it. So we need the North Star so they can know what their North Star is. So that would be my third one. It's like, you gotta figure out what makes you happy. And again, I'm not saying there's anything wrong with first time. I did a behind the scenes coming in here just because I was like, to my Patreon community, like, yo, y' all need to understand where I am and what's going on. But I don't. If you follow me on Instagram or TikTok, wherever I'm on, you don't see behind the scenes. I think that's a phenomenal tool to show other people what. But my wife is private. So for us, that does not work. She does not want to be seen in the landline. She doesn't want to be in Dubai and stop and go, let's take a. Let's document what we're doing. She doesn't like that. So for some people, it works. But I don't have to do that to still find a space, right? There's some people, they do tours, right? I don't do tours. That's not my thing. I used to do them, I don't do them now. There's some people that write books, some people don't write books. Like, it doesn't matter. But what matters is you have to find a thing that wakes you up at 3 o' clock or 6 o' clock or 10 o'. Clock. Like, you gotta find the thing that brings the life out of you, the joy out of you, the happiness out of you. And you can't do that following somebody else's North Star. So my last one would be, man, figure out what you was put on this earth to do. And I mean, every single chance you have to do it, do it. And when you're not doing it, enjoy your life. My son was like, damn, I'm tired. I say, you tired? You burnt out for what? Look at your mom and dad. You work for the family company. What are you doing? Well, I've been up the last six days working 10, 12 hours. I said, for once, what would you be doing that for? Why wouldn't you take advantage of the. You said, what should I be doing? I said, you should figure out what it is you do. He's a designer. You should be designing clothes Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, whenever, five, six hours a day. And then Saturday, Sunday, or Friday, Saturday, because of your family. You should get a trip somewhere and go spend it with a friend. You should go see the. You should go to Italy. You should go to Rome, son. You should go to South Africa, son. You should go to the Gold coast in Australia, son. What are you. Like you should. What are you doing? Like, you should work. But a part of work also is, where's your play? You should play. We worked hard so you could be balanced. So don't be like us. We grew up in a working class home. We grew up in Detroit. We grew up blue collar. You're not blue collar. So go enjoy your life. Be balanced. So I'm not just saying find your North Star in terms of what you've been called to do for others, but there should be a healthy amount of time that you spend enjoying your life and enjoying a little time that you have here. Because we both know we won't be doing this podcast 100 years from now.

Eric Thomas (47:42)

It's a lot. But here's the thing. I believe if you think about it, it is only because somewhere inside of you, you have what it takes to. Now, capacity is there. Willingness is something totally different. Yes, that's different. But I want every human to know. You wouldn't be watching the school of. You wouldn't be watching or listening to the school of greatness if you didn't believe you were great. I'm just. For real. You wouldn't be spending time with this man on a regular basis. I'm telling you, I wouldn't be going to Columbus. I drove to Columbus, bruh. It's not a. Trust me when I tell you it's not a. You don't get off the freeway. It's not 65. You get up. Why did I go? Because this man is great, and greats want to hang with greats. I need you to understand. Look, y' all may not know. Listen to me, I've got Nomad suitcases that I still carry this day because he gave them to me. Like I, I didn't buy a new one. I carry the exact same ones that he gave me. And my son bought a set because I had a set, because it reminds me of him. When I travel, it's like greatness, great. So you wouldn't be watching, you wouldn't be locked in something. Your spirit has you tuned into this man because you know you're great. Now you got to say to yourself, am I willing to cooperate with the greatness that's in me? And then once you do and you start consistently operating in that, you're going to feel good about it. Here's what you have to do. You have to understand. Andre de Shields, I think, said, the top of one mountain is the bottom of the mix. Wow. So, so, so you get to the top of the mountain, but you understand the, The G. The GED was just one. The, the four year degree was just one. The master just after the Ph.D. was the new York Times after that. It's the assessments, it's the training, it's the coaching I have. I'm, I'm in masterminds, I get coached. Yeah, right. And so it's this idea of yesterday's greatness can't be enough because I'm alive today. So if I'm alive today, it must be some more greatness in me. And it's my job, like the toothpaste. It's my job not to just lose. I don't know about you, but I would just use a little bit of it and get another one. I'm squeezing and I got money and I'm squeezing that toothpaste. Why? Because I'm trying to get everything out the tube before I go to another one and with my life before I get out of here, which is why I could murder myself, that I didn't realize at 12 that I was great. And that's why I say, you gotta check in 2025, you 2025. Why? Because I didn't know I was great. And once I checked it and realized how great I was, I was like, bruh, we gonna keep doing this until the day we die. And so I would just say to you, you're watching, you're in this space, you're reading his books, you're going to his conferences because you. No, it's in you. And it's time to stop being lazy. And it's time to, it's time to activate it.

Eric Thomas (51:57)

It's not easy to get control of your. I'm like, where did that thought come from? Right? So guys, let's go back to the 12 year old that found the birth certificate, right? We found the birth certificate. We found the birth certificate in the emotional state. Oh yeah, we found it in an emotional state. Listen to me, I'm not the first kid who has ever gone through this experience. And you know what I had to ask myself in that mirror at 16, 17, 18, I had to keep asking myself, when you saw it, why did you see it that way? Why did you not call your mom and say, mom, you would talk about this? Why didn't you go, hey ma, the counselor, can we go sit down and talk to the counselor? Hey mom, call dad, can we just sit down and listen to me. I went from I can't believe that you would do me like this. I went from a ball of emotions to living in abandoned buildings. It was the stupidest decision I have probably ever made. I put myself in so much danger as a 12 year old, 13 years old, homeless, based on emotions, on emotions. So the same document, nothing changed about it. But if I could go back as this adult and look at that, I would look at it as facts and go, wow, your mother protected you. Wow, your mom loved you so much that she didn't want you with your biological father because she thought he could be a threat, right, wrong or indifferent. Your mom didn't do this because she was trying to hurt you. Your mom did this because she was trying to protect you. Your mom brought you into a family. Your mom didn't try to hide the identity she wanted this man to be. Your father. He changed your name and gave you his last name. Wow. He treated me as if I was his own. Wow. He didn't lie. He made his family treat me as if I was. And don't ever say anything about my past, because my past has nothing to do with him making a decision at the courthouse to be my dad. Wow. It's the same document. One emotional, the other one is factual. Your mother loves you. Your mother cares for you. Your mother's trying to put you in a healthy environment. Your mother has a job. Your mother married somebody who was a Foreman, a gm, and he has a job. He has a college degree. He played basketball. He's a responsible man. He protected from take care. But emotion wouldn't let me be rational. Emotional wouldn't let me think rationally. It had me irrational. So I would say, when you make emotional decisions, you get emotional consequences. But it takes meditation, it takes controlling of the mind to say, how should I behave? How should I think in this situation? And what's going to give me the best outcomes? And I'm going to be honest. I've learned we can save the emotions for when I'm looking at the Nomad bag and going, man, that's my boy. Thank you. Why would you even buy me? Like, what would make you think of. And this is a perfect gift. You know what I'm saying? Like, I didn't think to buy suitcases for myself. That's where the emotion should be. Me coming in, seeing you, hugging you. What's up, fam? But when it comes to business, when it comes to being a leader and a decision maker, we not doing emotions. We're doing empirical evidence. Wow. We're doing facts. What does the fact say? What does the research say? What does the evidence say? Okay. And based on the research and the evidence, this is the game plan. Let's go. It doesn't matter how you feel. Yeah. Yeah. It don't matter how you feel.

Eric Thomas (64:04)

Dennis Kimbrough. Like, I went deep, I went heavy, you know, Arthur Ashe, you know, days of great. And I read everything. I was in the library like an addict, just studying and studying and studying. And it was because I didn't want the. I didn't want some of the consequences of the past to come in this generation, you know. And so for me, it was like, yo, your son's here. You got to handle your business. And I just heard I was more attentive. I started getting up at 6. And then I'd play this game. Daylight saving times would come. I would, okay, say, don't follow it, Stay up at five is the new. And then the next year, the four. And then I got started getting up at three and I started getting up at three o' clock in the morning because it was still. There was no dogs outside. Nobody was driving around. The family was sleep. And I was like, okay, coach, I'm sorry. Let's go back over the lessons I didn't get. And let's go over the new lessons. Coach me. Show me. Nobody knows me, man. I tell people I had a brand new Cadillac, man. They had 10,000 miles in it. Engine blew and I immediately took it back to Cadillac. I didn't take it to BMW, I didn't take it to Honda. I took it straight to Cadillac and I went right back to the creator, like, yo, you made me. And I'm tearing this car up. I'm not putting oil in it, I'm not changing the rotating the tires, I'm not putting fluid in it. Show me how to take care of this. And he began to show me how to do it. And it's just like amazing to see when we're on one Accord and I'm following the. He told me, he's like, yo, it's time. I think I called you maybe last year. I'm like, yo, I need to. And it was like, no, no, you just supposed to call and say what's up? You know? And then this time it was like, yep, you need to do it. You know, I was like, all right, I got it, Brandon. I think I was like, all right, you know what I'm saying? So just listen to him doing what he's telling me to do and let him coach me. So I would say, you know, don't spiritualize it and make it too. It's the coach. And just get a relationship with the coach. Let the coach get a relationship with you and just do what he tells you to do and you're going to love the results.

Eric Thomas (66:26)

This, this, this, this is what God is saying. You spent all of your mature life pouring into people who can't do a whole lot for you. You spent some kind of way in your soul. You feel like because of where you were and all these people that help you get to where. So it's like you like, you feel like you owe people to not be in mutual relationships. Like you feel like you're so blessed. And you have so much. It's almost a survivor of guilt, that now you just got to be with people who you got to pull, and you got to be with people that you got to beg to. And you got to be with people who you just got to bless, and you may not get nothing back. He like, no, no, no, no. In this season, these relationships have always been there for you, but you haven't taken advantage of them, because it's like, I got to help, and I got to fix, and I got to be a. I got a savior's complex. I got to help people. You help you and help you, because somebody helped me, and I wouldn't be here. And it's like. And C.J. said to me, eric, no, the only reason it worked is because you wanted it to work. Those mentors didn't do nothing for you. They did, but you had to want it. You're helping people that don't even want to be helped. They want a handout. Yeah. They don't want to be helped. Now the rest of your life, son, be in relationships where it's mutual. Just, bro, this might seem insignificant to you, but I, you know, they called me and was like, yo, let us know when you get here. Yeah, yeah. And I was like, all right, I'll be there. You know, whatever. And it was like, no, no, tell us. You know when you pull up. I'm like, tell you when I pull up, like, I can get upstairs on my own. They're like, no, no, no. Tell us when you get there. We're gonna meet you downstairs. Oh, and you want anything from Starbucks? No, I'm like, nah, I'm good. I didn't say anything to her. I was like, nah, I'm just in the car. I'm good. I can get my own Starbucks. He said, no, no, no, no, no, no. I'm trying to teach you something. She didn't ask you if you had money to buy Starbucks.