On this week's episode: Florida declares infinity plus ONE congressmen ... Bret Michaels had better things to do ... And we learn how a weighted penis bag might affect your weekend.

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Headline Sources:

Trump’s attempt at slush fund for Jan 6 rioters goes poorly: https://www.cnn.com/2026/05/29/politics/federal-judge-halts-work-on-trumps-anti-weaponization-fund

Judge Allows Florida House Map That Could Add 4 Republican Seats: https://www.nytimes.com/2026/05/26/us/florida-congress-map-redistricting.html

Were the Enhanced Games a Bust? - Organizers Are Upping the Ante to $10 Million: https://www.vanityfair.com/culture/story/enhanced-games-ten-million-reward

Kash Patel's apparel site is trying to trick visitors into installing malware: https://www.pcmag.com/news/kash-patels-apparel-site-is-trying-to-trick-visitors-into-installing-malware
Ka$h Patel actually does my joke 2 days later with custom engraved bourbon: https://www.theatlantic.com/politics/2026/05/kash-patel-fbi-bourbon/687066/
Kash goes snorkeling at Pearl Harbor:
https://newrepublic.com/post/210478/report-kash-patel-desperate-snorkel-graveyard-pearl-harbor

Almost everybody pulls out of Trump’s stupid America rally and then he cancels it:: https://pagesix.com/entertainment/freedom-250-concert-festival-artists-backing-out-lineup/
https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/cy02j1n87wlo

The Knicks are in the finals and Donald Trump might ruin it: https://thespun.com/nba/knicks-fans-urged-to-ignore-president-trump-at-nba-finals

Clavicular gives penismaxxing advice and gets mogged by a judge: https://www.wonkette.com/p/dont-go-taking-any-penis-advice-from