← The Bossticks
The Bossticks
10 Tools To Make 2025 Your Best Year Yet: Habits & Mindset Shifts Ft. Michael & Lauryn Bosstick
00:48:25
#792: New Year, New Goals – Make 2025 Your Best Year Yet! Join Michael & Lauryn Bosstick as they sit down to discuss their goals & intentions for the New Year, sharing actionable habits & meaningful changes to inspire your own journey....
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- [00:00]
A
The following podcast is a dear media production. For those of you feeling charitable in the new year and wanting to play a small part for the safety of our children, our community. Every day our law enforcement officers face life and death decisions in increasingly dangerous environments. From high stress incidents to critical officer involved events. These men and women are on the front lines, yet they lack the training, funding and resources they need to protect themselves and the communities they serve. Enter the Community First Project a service disabled veteran owned nonprofit founded by a tier one Navy SEALs and Army Special Operations leader. Their mission to provide cutting edge real world tactical training that empowers officers to serve, protect and survive. At C1P, they believe in the power of training to save lives, both the lives of officers and the lives of the communities they protect. With expert led comprehensive programs, Community First Project helps to bridge the gap between what our law enforcement needs and what they're given. So when you support C1P, you're not just donating, you're making sure officers are prepared for the challenges they face every day. You're helping build safer, stronger communities and most importantly, you're saving lives. I'm very passionate about this mission and hope our audience is as well. So join us in the this crucial mission. Visit c1p.org today to learn how you can help make a difference. Again, if you can, go do your part and make a contribution@c1p.org she's a lifestyle blogger extraordinaire.
- [01:17]
B
Fantastic.
- [01:18]
A
And he's a serial entrepreneur, a very smart cookie. And now Lauren Everts and Michael Bostick are bringing you along for the ride.
- [01:26]
B
Get ready for some major realness.
- [01:28]
A
Welcome to the Skinny Confidential. Him and her. Hello everybody. Happy New Year. Didn't I couldn't quite tell if you were doing a selfie there of what we were going or not. New Year. New you, New me. New all of us.
- [01:47]
B
Is it a new you?
- [01:48]
A
It's new New me. Maybe say me. Anyways guys, I want to start the new year off by addressing the elephant in the room that has been the elephant in the room for a long time. We finally were able to fix the levels of the studio. No more commenting. Take creatine. Your honor, all these people out there is this big speculation. Why are you above the guest? Why you put the guests like this? Listen guys, when we built the studio, somebody's fuck up Carson, I don't want to say it was yours. I'll take accountability, Carson. But anyways, long story short, we built.
- [02:21]
B
This studio, it was actually me, somebody.
- [02:23]
A
Who set the studio up wrong and.
- [02:24]
B
So what I was like, put us in like a. In like a box area situation where we're like the dj.
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A
Yeah, but it was.
- [02:32]
B
I know, but it didn't land on video.
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A
It didn't land on video.
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B
You guys don't know what we're talking about.
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A
Oh, they know what we're talking about.
- [02:37]
B
Okay. If you don't know what we're talking about, though. We designed a studio. It's amazing. It's in Austin, Texas. But when we designed it, the area that Michael and I sit at is higher than the guest. So it looks like were looking down on the guests.
- [02:51]
A
They know. They. They know they've commented. They've. They've been tearing us around.
- [02:55]
B
I don't read a lot of the comments.
- [02:56]
A
I understand that. Listen, we've only been doing this show for about 10 years. How are we supposed to know how to set up a studio? Right? Anyways, long story short, guys, it's a work in progress. We. We wanted to fix it for a long time, but we record so frequently because we're producing these episodes so often that we didn't have enough downtime to get somebody in here to take the whole thing apart and reset it. Recently, we just went to California for two weeks. We're recording over there doing holiday party end of year stuff in that office. And we had the time to set it. So now we fixed the studio. Know what you've been saying. We get it. It's been awkward for us too.
- [03:25]
B
New year, new studio. Okay, let's hop right into it. 10 things that we are doing this year that we hope will inspire some of you.
- [03:37]
A
Are you gonna look at me during the episode or are you just gonna.
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B
No, I don't wanna look at you because I like this angle of myself.
- [03:43]
A
All right, fine.
- [03:44]
B
So I'm just gonna side peripheral you and talk to you like this. So you.
- [03:49]
A
It's really awkward because I'm staring at the side of your head trying to have a conversation.
- [03:52]
B
Some people aren't watching this episode. They're listening. So it's fine. I'm peripheraling you out of my eyes. You're gonna have to deal with it some.
- [04:01]
A
At some point, we're gonna figure out just the right geometry, trigonometry, algebra to get this studio set up so that we can actually look at each other. Get the right angles, have the right height. We'll figure it out. Promise. Okay, guys, so we wanted to do an episode to kick off the year to talk about. It's actually things that Lauren and I do every year at the start of a new year to completely enhance our. Our lives, improve, get better. Started off on the right foot. We thought sharing it with you guys as we move into 2025 would be beneficial for those that can maybe take some of what we do and apply it to their own life so that you can also have a fabulous year. So this episode, we're going to talk about these 10 things we do. I have five. Lauren has five. Lauren, do you want to kick it off?
- [04:39]
B
Well, first, I just want to say that this is kind of like an audit. So what? Like, personally, what I did is I looked at my last year. I looked at the areas where I think that I could improve for the upcoming, and I wrote down all of those areas that I wanted to improve. But typically, what I do with this is I do like, a think week. My favorite. My favorite.
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A
I don't know if I'm gonna be able to get through this without looking with you looking at me. This is so awkward.
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B
My favorite thing to do. My favorite time of the year. Literally no one can unsee. This is the 2nd to the 7th, January 2nd to the 7th, and I'll tell you why. Everyone is exhausted by their family from Christmas or the holidays, and then they're exhausted from the new year. So no one is, like, on it, which is so nice because it gives you actually space to have clarity. So I do a think week from the 2nd to the 7th, and I go over everything I want. All my intentions, all my goals, all my systems, everything. And I put it into a journal of what I want to accomplish for the upcoming year. And then I'll write a page of all my ideas that I want to get done by the end of the year, and I'll fold it up and put it in a drawer, and I'll get to the end of the year and make sure I did all.
- [05:56]
A
Are you talking to me or are you just talking off into space? This is. Anyways, I think we should run a poll.
- [06:01]
B
Okay.
- [06:01]
A
I think the best time of the year is the 26th to the 30th, because everybody's out and checked out, and it's wrong. You get quiet time. Everyone's back. The second, though, everyone's ready to go. They're nailing your inbox. Yeah, they're nailing your inbox.
- [06:14]
B
Do a poll. Go comment on our latest Instagram. No one is ready to go. The second they're burnt out, they're tired, they're done, they want time to themselves. It's time to recharge the battery. No What? Carson, what's better?
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A
Sorry, I was spacing out.
- [06:28]
B
I was fixing. No, I was fixing the middle camera. I was fixing the middle camera.
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A
Okay, listen, I'm telling you, the. The question is, what is the most quiet, best organized week to. To kind of like go introspective?
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B
No, no, no. Way too long. Long in the truth.
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A
Question.
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B
This is the question. What is the best time of the year to have space to yourself? The 26 through the first.
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A
No, I said 26th through the 30th or the second.
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B
January 2nd to the 7th?
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A
I think the 2nd to the 7th.
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B
Yeah. 100%.
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A
Are you. Carson, we're back in office on the 2nd. You better not be having space yourself.
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B
You better be spaced out. You're not, you know. No, trust me.
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A
I'm telling you. Because 26th to the 30th, nobody's around. Everything's shut down.
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B
My think week is the 2nd through the 7th of January.
- [07:11]
A
So what is. Is this your first thing you do is you take the think week.
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B
That's your first week. I do my think week.
- [07:14]
A
That's number one on the list. You take a think week.
- [07:15]
B
No, no, that's not on my list. I pulled my list out. Oh, okay. So I wrote my list out. I wrote it in my notes app, and I'll go first with mine.
- [07:24]
A
So you can do number one first.
- [07:25]
B
Yeah. Something that is so important to me, and I feel like this is important to you too. And I cannot perform like the athlete that I want to perform at in business if I don't have this is space. Space on my calendar is something that is, like. It's probably the most important thing because I can choose what to plug in to that space. So when I first started the blog, everything was, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, I can do it. Yes, I can hustle. Yes, yes, yes, yes. Got me so far for, like, nine years, and then yes, stops working for you. You have to learn to say no, and you have to have sort of this transition. And now I'm at the space where I have said no to a lot of things for the last, like, I don't know, five years. But now I'm at the. The point where this upcoming year, I want to see gaps on my calendar. Katie, I hope you're listening. And I've noticed with even being your wife, that if you don't have space on your calendar, you're not as efficient.
- [08:26]
A
Yeah. But I do think, to play devil's advocate for people that are listening, there is a period in your career, you know, we're gonna get a little older here where you have to have a lot more yeses in the beginning than no's.
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B
Absolutely. Absolutely.
- [08:41]
A
Luckily now, I mean, we've been doing this for a long time. You can have a few more nos. But I agree with you. I think in order, you have to say yes for a long time in order to create opportunity. But then at some point, once you've drummed up some opportunity for yourself, and we did an episode with Ryan Holiday on this, then you have to kind of step back and protect those opportunities by saying no. You can't just say yes forever.
- [08:59]
B
He has this funny meme on his page where it's like all these different blocks on his calendar. And the first one's like, no, I cannot get my brain picked for coffee. I will be reading. And the next one's like, no, I cannot go to your event. I will be working on building my business. And, like, that's kind of how I'm looking at it. And to be really honest, I'm just at a space in my life right now where if I don't want to do it and it's not moving the needle towards something that I'm super passionate about, the show, my product line, my family, it's going to be a no for me. And I'm. I'm actually really comfortable with saying that. I used to be like, oh, no. But if I don't want to do it, I'm not doing it. That's just where I'm at. And that's. That's this year. It's like that. That's it.
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A
So what's the takeaway? What's the.
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B
Okay, so the takeaway is, what will I be filling that. That space with? Because I think that that's the takeaway for the audience. If you do want to create more space on your calendar. So what are you filling the space with? I like to fill it with creating, writing. If you want to write a book, you can fill that space every day with 20 minutes a day of writing that goes towards the bigger picture, which is a book. You've always wanted to write a book. Get some free space on your calendar. You could fill it with meditating, which is going to center you. It's going to relax your nervous system. You could fill it with working out. You could fill it with taking a walk. You could fill it with, I don't know, making a morning coffee. The point is, you're filling it with things that you feel like move the needle for you to be better so.
- [10:27]
A
You'Re not just opening space to do nothing. You have to fill it.
- [10:30]
B
My thing is, yeah, like, open the space, but be intentional about the space. So, like. Like, for me, I have in my calendar. I know you have this too. Reading for an hour at night. That's in both of our calendars. That's open space. I like to open space in my calendars to be with my kids, so when I pick them up from school, I'll open space to bake cookies. It can be really simple, but it's opening space to do what you actually want to do.
- [10:55]
A
My first thing, I do this at the beginning of every year. Lauren knows I do this. I've talked about it on a solo episode. It's a system that I call the 71 1, which, again, I didn't come up with, but it's something implement. I start every single year with the overall theme of what I want that year to be. So, for example, in 2023, that theme was, I need to develop a fitness routine that I stay consistent with. And the theme was like, that's like everything else in my life worked around that routine. The theme of this year was like, I want to get in great shape. I'm almost approaching my 40s. I want to be in the best shape of my life by the time I'm 40. So this year, the theme was health, fitness, wellness, getting my sleep under control, getting my diet under control, getting my body in shape, all these. The theme of this year, now that I feel like I have a base, is I just want to be an absolute beast in business this year. I want to go really hard. I want to get all the distractions out. I want the theme of this year to be, when you look back on it, like, this guy just crushed his business this year. And so anyways, I think overarching. The takeaway here is that I pick a theme, and I think anyone can pick a theme for what they want. The overarching theme again, I'll say it again, of their year to be. And then I implement the 711 strategy, which I've talked about before, but which I will remind everyone here. Again, the 711 strategy is you create a goal list of what you want to happen in seven years. And the reason it's seven years is that gives you enough time and enough future perspective to pursue big goals. So you write down a list of maybe four or five things that you want to happen in seven years that could be, you know, you want to be married or you want to have a house, or you Want to have X amount in savings or you want to have X children or you want to be in this, relate whatever the, whatever it is in seven years that you want to happen. And I think you can get specific with that, like I want this kind of house or this kind of family or this kind of savings account or whatever it may be. Then the next part of that is I do the one which is a year, what do I need to do in one year's time and I literally write this out. What needs to happen this year, this year being 2025 for me to move as far as I can against the goal that I've set for myself in the future of seven years. And then once I know what this year needs to look like, for example, that might be I need to save $20,000 in one year or I need to get in a serious relationship in one year or I need to have, I need to be going to the gym or I need it, whatever it may be, you set that year. And then the last part is the last one, which is one month. What are the systems and things you need to do every single month to execute against that one year goal? I think if you create a theme overall for the, for the year, like I said in my case, I want to really focus on my business. And then you have long term goals in seven year window to pursue against and then you have a one year plan mixed with one year or one month goals. You'll just start to be able to execute efficiently all the time. I think the biggest mistake people make is they make these huge goals with no execution plan and then they don't get anywhere. So pick a theme, do the 711 rule. That's how I would start every year. And that's what I think everyone else should do as well.
- [13:54]
B
I also think though that you need to talk about little things around being a beast in business. Meaning you told me this like you're gonna drink less alcohol, which is then going to make you a beast in business. You're going to blank to blank. I think you need to give like little because you're not just saying I want to be a beast.
- [14:13]
A
So if you pick, if you pick a theme for your year, then what you're doing is you're also taking on an identity. So if I want to be, quote unquote, a business beast, that's what they call me. But if they say you want to crush your business this year, okay, or your career, or your job, whatever it may be, your career, then you take that on his identity and say, if you're going to be someone that's doing those things for this year, then it. Then it. Then what would that kind of person who does those things do? Well, that means you can't be out at the bar every night drinking till 2am that means you.
- [14:42]
B
That's never really been you, though.
- [14:43]
A
You can't be playing video games all the time. You can't be trying to go on 18 million dates. You can't be distracted. You. You have to say yes to a lot more things to move the business forward. You have to get uncomfortable. You have to maybe stretch yourself in a way that you wouldn't. You have to be. If you're in a company, maybe you have to vaul volunteer more, you have to speak more, whatever it may be. But by taking on the identity of what somebody that is a quote unquote business beast or career beast would do, it helps you eliminate because you can ask yourself, what would that person not do? And so whenever I go into these years, like for example this year, if I want to be a healthy person, that means a healthy person eats well, goes to the gym, consistently sleeps well, takes care of themselves. You know, you're not eating McDonald's every night or treating yourself poorly because it's not what a healthy person would do.
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B
Are you at request for coaching?
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A
Sure.
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B
Do you have a request box?
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A
Actually, you know what? Now the way you're saying it, I don't know if I'm at request for coaching. I changed my mind.
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B
I have a. I have a request to put in the request box. Can 2016 be I'm going to be a beast husband?
- [15:45]
A
2016, like when we got married? Yes. You got it, Lauren. That's the year we got married. Nailed it that year.
- [15:51]
B
2026 should be that you are going to be a beast husband.
- [15:57]
A
Not next year.
- [15:59]
B
No, I'll skip a year.
- [16:00]
A
I could, you know, 2025. I already made the theme in this year.
- [16:03]
B
Okay, so 2026.
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A
2026. I'm gonna. I'm gonna be a sex machine.
- [16:08]
B
That's not what I was referring to, but sure.
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A
Okay, Lauren, what's your number two?
- [16:13]
B
Number two.
- [16:13]
A
I guess it's me. Number three on our list.
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B
No, it's number two.
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A
What's number three on the overall? You did one, I did one, and I wrote three.
- [16:19]
B
Okay, so we recently had Mel Robbins on the podcast. I find her to be very interesting, and I think that her theories are very digestible and applicable. I think it's something you could wake up tomorrow and apply her 5 second rule I think is a really good one to get you going. But the one that resonated for me is in her latest book, Let them and then Let Me. So she said it's like a two part thing. So let people do whatever they want to do, just let them, but then let me. And I think Let me is like I'm gonna respond how I think I should respond accordingly. And I think using that theory is, is so amazing because it doesn't allow you to give energy towards things that aren't moving your needle. And it doesn't, it doesn't, you don't really have the capacity to deal with everyone's bullshit. So I got her book, I've been highlighting it. I highly recommend it. I think it's a really good easy theory to apply to next year. And it, it truly gives you more gas in your tank to do things that are more productive.
- [17:28]
A
Quick break to talk about Symbiotica. You're currently listening to an episode all about starting the year off right. Implementing habits that you know will help carry you through the year in the most effective way possible. This is why I'm so excited to talk to you as well about Symbiotica's liposomal vitamin C. Bringing liposomal vitamin C from Symbiotica into the new year is a no brainer. If you want to feel better, you want more collagen production, you want your skin to look and you want to have your immune function blasting at the strongest wavelengths possible. Implementing symbiotic as vitamin C is a no brainer. Lauren and I have been taking their vitamin C for years now. Every single time I fly, every single time I travel, every single time I'm worried about getting sick, I slam a pack of their vitamin C and I'm good to go. What I love the most about the liposomal vitamin C from Symbiotica is that you eat it. Unlike taking it like a regular pill supplement, you know your body's getting exactly what it needs. And what's also cool about Symbiotica is the quality of their products they're free for from seed oils, preservatives, toxins or artificial additives found in so many supplements. You're only getting the good stuff your body craves. What we find makes it so easy and consistent is their convenient monthly subscription service that helps you never run out of your health boosting essentials. Lauren and I are think are subscribed to almost all of their products. We've had the founders of Symbiotica on this show, I think four or five times. We're going to have them on again because you can just talk to them on and on. They're doing so many incredible things as a company. So check them out. High quality holistic wellness right at your fingertips. Be present and feel your best. For life's most memorable moments. Go to symbiotic symbiota.com TSC or use code TSC for 20 off your subscription order plus free shipping today. Again, go to symbiotica.com TSC or use code TSC for 20% off your subscription order plus free shipping today.
- [19:08]
C
A lot of you reached out like a crazy amount after our episode with the founders of OH Positive Health. And some of you shared your experience with pcos. Some of you talked about vaginal health and some of you talked about just sex health in general. You loved that podcast and it doesn't surprise me cause I feel like it's not talked about enough. Oh Positive Health supports women at every stage of their life. So from your first period to even beyond. So they have this endocrine superfood powder. It's probably one of their most amazing product drops. So it's called Flow Endocrine superfood powder and it basically just supports your endocrine system. They also are all about vaginal health. So if you wanted like an intimate deodorant for down there or even a boric acid suppository, they really have you covered. Their vaginal probiotic is very, very popular. Women all over TikTok are saying it really helps with vaginal odor and ph balance. I think this company is very avant garde and I think the messaging behind it is so important. This should not be a taboo subject to talk about your vagina. I think this just needs to be talked about more. If you're looking for O positive health, you can find it in Target nationwide in the intimate care aisle. You can also go on Amazon or find it oh positive.com you should know that everything they do is backed by a team of board approved doctors. Visit oppositive.com and use code skinny at checkout for 25% off. That's O-P-O-S-I-T-I V.com use code skinny for 25 off your order. That's O positive without the E. If you follow me on Instagram stories, you know I love my aura ring. You see it in a lot of pictures and when I'm wearing it, I'm always wearing it to upgrade my sleep. I take my sleep so seriously. Like, it is probably number one on my list even before time. Sleep is the most important thing to me because it sets the entire tone of the day. So I wanted to upgrade this and I talked to Brian Johnson and also a sleep expert, Matthew Walker. They both recommended the Oura Ring.
- [21:18]
B
I tried it.
- [21:19]
C
I loved it. If you're unfamiliar with the Oura Ring, it's a revolutionary, smart ring that delivers personalized health data, insights and daily guidance. A lot of people like me use it to learn how to improve sleep, manage stress. They like it to understand their heart health, track activity, and more. Oura Ring empowers women to better understand their bodies so they can be their own health advocate. For instance, something that's really cool is you can use the Oura Ring with the Natural Cycles app so you can literally take control of your fertility effortlessly with Natural Cycles. I think this is so amazing because it really gives you the power, which is awesome. If you want to upgrade your sleep like I did, or you just want to prevent or plan pregnancies with natural cycles, you have to check them out. It's such a good one to commit to your health, your body, yourself. In the new year, it's all about sleep. And I know you guys feel the same way, so definitely check them out. You can visit oura ring.com that's oura ring.com.
- [22:20]
A
I'M going to take you very seriously in saying that you're going to implement some of these things. So as we move into 2025, you're going to let me. Yep, go ahead, do my thing. You're not gonna be a backseat driver. You're not gonna be micromanaging my time.
- [22:35]
B
On it, but that's fine.
- [22:37]
A
Well, you're not gonna be wondering what I'm doing if I'm, you know, playing my games or.
- [22:44]
B
What game do you play? Tell everyone what game you play. He loves these games.
- [22:48]
A
No. What? I.
- [22:49]
B
No. What's the game?
- [22:50]
A
So tangent, I was talking to Dr. Craig Conover, who's our doctor, and he was saying he looked at all my blood work. He's like, I think you should go and do something that' good for your mind de stressing and just like go back, play video games because they're active. You're actually participating, but you're also zoning out. So I don't, you know, I just play.
- [23:03]
B
What's the game you play?
- [23:05]
A
I played Wukong. Carson knows that. I love that game. That was a good game. I'm playing call of Duty 6 right now, but that's like, you could do that on and off. I got this new Star wars game. Didn't like that one that much.
- [23:17]
B
Okay.
- [23:18]
A
I got.
- [23:19]
B
It seems like playing games is, like my housewife.
- [23:23]
A
Yeah. I just, like, go and I zone out.
- [23:25]
B
Okay.
- [23:25]
A
Hang out. But anyways. Okay. I'm just gonna hold you to that. You're gonna let me. I don't think you can.
- [23:30]
B
My husband. You're not on porn. You're on games.
- [23:36]
A
I don't think guys should watch porn.
- [23:39]
B
Oh, here's a. Here's a twist. Carson, this wasn't expected in this episode. Okay?
- [23:43]
A
I've talked to too many people. It's just not. It's not good for your sex life. It's not good for your attention lately. I'm not gonna judge if you've watched porn. I've watched porn in the past, but I don't find it productive. I think it lowers your testosterone. Testosterone, Maybe. Maybe I'm a myth about that. I think it teaches you to finish too quickly in the bedroom. I think it's bad for your dopamine. We've also. We've talked to porn stars on the show, and after hearing their stories, I.
- [24:04]
B
You got turned off on it after talking to porn stars on the show?
- [24:07]
A
Well, we talked to Lana Rhodes, and she's, like, a prominent adult performer. Adult filmster. Is that what you call them? And after hearing, like, she was like, I didn't enjoy it. I didn't like. I'm like, this is. I don't like the idea that someone's not enjoying.
- [24:19]
B
I think you had a daughter, too. Yeah. Anyways, a lot.
- [24:22]
A
I've just found more productive things to do.
- [24:24]
B
You know what? Also, like, I'm fine if people watch porn. Do you? I like a little porn sometimes, but there's something like. I don't know if it's Taylor's visual, but, like, a guy just actively, like, beating his meat, alone in a room that's dark, that feels like.
- [24:40]
A
Really, guys, I got. I got.
- [24:42]
B
It feels like a lot. And I don't know if it's because Taylor confessed on the show that he watches it three times a day, but it's just in my head.
- [24:50]
A
Let me paint a picture for you, Carson.
- [24:51]
B
Stuck in my head, Taylor. Stuck in my head.
- [24:54]
A
I've got young children running around, a wife. We've got nannies. We've got people in and out of the house all the time. The last thing I need is for someone to bust into the room with my ankles or my pants down, around my ankles, Be my knee in the corner. Like, it Would just be devastating. Like, that's just not. I don't need that to happen in my life. I'm way too far along to, like, get caught in that position.
- [25:13]
B
Okay.
- [25:14]
A
You know what I mean? That would just be terrible. Can you imagine? He's like, hey, I got the new flower collection for whatever you're putting in the house. I'm just.
- [25:22]
B
If I catch you watching porn, you know what I'm gonna say? Let them.
- [25:27]
A
You won't catch. I mean, that's the thing is, like, I would rather not have the porn than even risk for a second getting caught in that house.
- [25:33]
B
I would love to catch you watching porn.
- [25:35]
A
No. And imagine, like, the face.
- [25:37]
B
No, I would just love it.
- [25:38]
A
That's every guy's worst nightmare, to be.
- [25:39]
B
Caught with that face alone. That face is tough.
- [25:43]
A
You know? Like, someone's like. Everyone's like, oh, you shouldn't be ashamed. Like, you should talk about sex. Some things you should be ashamed of if you get caught with your hands down on your ankle in your house.
- [25:51]
B
Remember when we were in Aspen and I took Weston's phone and was, like, trying to order something, and, like, all this porn popped up?
- [25:59]
A
Okay, I guess we're just gonna put him on blast.
- [26:01]
B
Okay, what's your number? Two?
- [26:03]
A
Okay, this is number four now. Okay, Michael, whatever number four is, I think this is a really valuable exercise that everyone can do that we don't do enough as people, and that is to make an audit list of what worked and what did not work in the year.
- [26:18]
B
So that's a good one.
- [26:19]
A
Literally, you could create a T chart. Remember those old T charts you created in school? And you say on one side what worked for me, and the other side what didn't work for me. And you could go down and you could say, the routines that work, the routines that didn't work. You could say, you know, the habits that work, the habits that didn't work. You can say, you know. You know, if you've been watching politics for the last eight years through two different administrations, and you haven't been executing because you've been telling yourself that this administration's holding you back, maybe that's not working. I just went on a tangent. Friends, relationships, all sorts of things you could really and go through. Honestly, this is the hard part, because a lot of us struggle with self awareness, going through and saying what really was serving me and what really was not. And then by the end of that list, you'll have a blueprint of what you should continue doing in the future and throughout the year. What you should do more of and what you should maybe think about eliminating or doing less of.
- [27:10]
B
I think friends is a good one too. If you're constantly complaining about a friend, it's just not working to me. I would rather walk on the beach. I would rather take a walk outside. I would rather meditate. I would rather eat good pizza with my kids. I just. If it's not someone that you're really excited about, it might not just be a fit. And. And listen, there's different seasons of friendships. If you're constantly complaining about the same friend over and over, you're the problem, not the friend.
- [27:38]
A
But you could even do it with content. Like, what content's been working for you? What's not been working for you? What, you know, sleep routines, what's up? Like, all of these things, I think we go through life and we just get into these habits and these routines, doing the same things and the same patterns over and over. We don't stop enough to assess what's working and what's not. And this could even be for what's going on with dating or in relationships. Like, once you go through the list and you're honest about it and you. And you, you know, put as many things on there as you can, then you can at least move forward into the next year or this year with an idea of what you should keep doing and what you should maybe think about eliminating.
- [28:10]
B
So Taylor should audit his Google history and look at all the different kinds of plethoras of porn that he's been watching and see what's been working for him and what hasn't.
- [28:20]
A
I bet. I know we're on the porn tangent that if more guys were honest about if porn is working for them or against them, you would have less people participating. And again, I have no problem, like, if that's your thing.
- [28:34]
B
But if you're coming too quick in the bedroom, that's probably a problem.
- [28:37]
A
If you're having intimacy issues or if your testosterone is low or if you're not getting dopamine or if maybe you can't get turned on. Like, there's. There's a million things that I think that causes issues with. But anyways, hopefully Taylor's editing this.
- [28:50]
B
Okay, this one. I think every single person on the planet who has a phone needs to think about having really purposeful boundaries around my phone. That is my 2025 energy. I don't want to be someone that is like, Ichabod Crane. Like, I don't want to be Ichabod Crane in my phone. I don't want my kids to see that. I want to put away my phone every single time I come home and spend uninterrupted, fully present time with them with my husband at the dinner table. I don't want a phone. I don't want to use my phone when I'm walking to the bathroom. I just. I want to be thoughtful about it. Because what I'm noticing is that everyone around us is addicted to their phone. Like, it's. It's honestly crazy. And I'm not excluding myself. It's just like we can't do anything without the phone. And so this year I want to almost be like, really mindful of when I'm using it and when I'm not. And one thing I've done. Yes.
- [29:52]
A
I'm just waving at you because it's really awkward to hear you talking. I'm just like, I'm over here, buddy. I'm just over here in the corner. I'm gonna. Just turn your head a little.
- [30:02]
B
I'm not talking to you.
- [30:03]
A
Okay. All right.
- [30:04]
B
Let me get my protractor out. The phone is. Is, I think, going to become a problem. I see people getting more addicted, not less addicted. I literally think people are going to start going to rehab for their phone. It's so dismissive and obnoxious too, when you're talking to someone. And by the way, I'm including myself in this. I don't think I'm superior.
- [30:24]
A
Lauren, you're literally saying what's dismissive and what is it while you're not looking at me as you're talking? Am I insane or are you insane or are we insane?
- [30:34]
B
So I just. You're making me laugh, Michael.
- [30:39]
A
Well, I'm over. I'm surprised. I make you do anything sitting.
- [30:43]
B
I haven't seen you today.
- [30:45]
A
Oh, what do I look like in your peripheral?
- [30:48]
B
You look dewy. I just really want this next year for me to put away my phone intentionally. So one thing that I've done this year that's been absolutely game changing, that I think everyone should try, is I put away my phone at 7:30. That's. That's it. The phone's on airplane mode. It's off. I never bring it to bed. I, like, don't want my phone to be my security blanket in bed. I don't think it's a good example for my children. I don't think it's time. I don't associate my phone with rest. Like, I just think my Phone's disgusting. By 7:30, I work off my Phone. My phone's constantly around me. Everything I do for social media is on my phone. By 7:30, I'm done with it. It's put away and out comes the Kindle in dark mode. And that helps me to wind down and relax. So I think what I'm saying with this one is, like, I would really have a plan and a strategy when it comes to your phone for this year. Don't just like, numb out on your phone and use it as some distraction. I know for me, I'm also going to be making sure that my phone is away until like 9 or 10 in the morning. So I have. Have that time. I do that most of the time, but sometimes you get sucked in. So it's kind of a work in progress.
- [32:00]
A
All right, I got, I got half of that because I wasn't making eye contact with you. So hopefully that one I can apply.
- [32:07]
B
Cry me a river.
- [32:08]
A
This one I think you'll agree with me on. And I really thought about something that made me happy this year that I haven't done for the last few years. We've just been so into it with kids and work and the show and everything. But I think it's interesting and maybe beneficial for everyone to think about taking on and learning either a new hobby or a new skill set. For example, what we did this year is we both got really into tennis, and this was something that I never played before growing up. It's something that I really wanted to learn how to get better in. I'm still obviously a huge, huge work in progress. Tennis is very enjoyable, yet very frustrating at the same time.
- [32:49]
B
I know, but that's why it's like, it's fine.
- [32:51]
A
I love it. It's.
- [32:51]
B
It's like chipping away.
- [32:52]
A
And so anyways, the, the tip there is it doesn't have to be tennis, but I think it's a great idea for anyone to think of a hobby or a skill or an art that you can pursue that takes you out of your work, out of your family life, out of your relationship, out of your problems. It's going to force you to focus on that. So, you know, if you've been someone that's like, hey, I really want to get into art, maybe it's taking art classes. If you want to get into an new sport, maybe it's learning that sport. In our case, it was tennis. If you want to learn a new skill set or, you know, study something different, whatever it may be, I think we're. We take life so seriously. We don't incorporate nearly Enough play and leisure and downtime. And so for us, it was tennis. It was also a little bit of Pilates. I think I'm going to pick another thing this upcoming year to try.
- [33:33]
B
You're going to talk about your Pilates.
- [33:35]
A
I got into it a little bit. I'm learning. I'm still learning more. But these are things that Pilates and tennis I never did in my entire life before. I'm 38 or 37 going in. And so to take those on at this stage, life, it just proved to me like, hey, you can keep doing things. And I think it. The learning curve is interesting.
- [33:50]
B
Yeah.
- [33:51]
A
And it takes me out of my work and out of the stress and on my family life and all of that. So I would suggest everybody just kind of pick one thing that's been in the back burner or back of your mind to pursue in 2025, because I think it's enhanced everything else.
- [34:05]
B
Michael is very good at Pilates.
- [34:07]
A
I'm not very good at it.
- [34:08]
B
Tennis also is. Was recommended to me by Dr. Amen because he scanned my brain and told me that to avoid dementia or Alzheimer's, I needed to take on a sport. What was it that used my coordination?
- [34:21]
A
People that play rocket sports, particularly tennis, ping pong. I don't know the other one. Studies have shown that they can live 10 years longer.
- [34:29]
B
So, yeah, yeah, it's a great sport. It's so much fun. I think it's helped our marriage. It's like we've even involved our kids and we got the best friends. Our friends are involved. We got the best tip from this teacher that said that you should take your kids on the court for only 15 minutes, and then when it's starting to get fun, you should pull them off.
- [34:48]
A
Well, he's also very competitive. No, the idea is that you want them to crave doing it as a.
- [34:53]
B
Person and be excited and not. Not be overwhelmed with like, oh, my God, I have have to play the sport. I'm not. I don't want to be a parent that's like constantly pushing my kids into every single activity every day. I want to see what they gravitate towards, and I want to see what they like, and I want to make sure they're enjoying it. I don't want to be like a mom that has 6,000 things for them to do every day.
- [35:16]
A
This is like a bonus for the couples out there. I think Lauren and I deciding to play tennis together has also been good for our relationship because when you travel or when we're together, we we can play it together. You can age with it. And there's always tennis courts around the world. So we found something to do together as a couple that we're both learning at.
- [35:35]
B
So we don't do enough together.
- [35:37]
A
Yeah, well, we wanted another thing to do together.
- [35:40]
B
Okay, what's next? Let's see.
- [35:44]
A
Is this number eight?
- [35:45]
B
I don't know.
- [35:46]
A
Michael losing track. Or number seven?
- [35:49]
B
Oh, this one you'll be so happy about. So I read every single night. It is non negotiable. It's the most important thing, One of the most important things I do every day. It's to me, like working out. I want to work out seven days a week. I want to read seven days a week. It's a streak that I'm on. I think it just makes you smarter, better, faster, sharper, more powerful.
- [36:10]
A
What if I start talking like this, Michael? Isn't that gonna be weird? If I was just like.
- [36:13]
B
If I was just like. You're gonna be happy. This is your Christmas present. I'm finally committing on air to reading the books that my husband has asked me to read.
- [36:23]
A
Oh, we'll see. We'll see.
- [36:25]
B
No, I am.
- [36:25]
A
So which ones have I asked you to read?
- [36:27]
B
That you're Shogun.
- [36:28]
A
You're gonna read Shogun by James Clavell. Lonesome Dove, Lonesome dove by Larry McMurtry.
- [36:31]
B
Noble House.
- [36:32]
A
Taipan first, but then Noble House.
- [36:35]
B
Weston said he didn't love taipan.
- [36:36]
A
No, he loved Taipan. He didn't like gaijin. Okay, but gaijin is.
- [36:39]
B
I don't know about gaijin.
- [36:40]
A
Listen, for the. James. James Clavell is amazing author. They just made Shogun into a show, which was pretty good.
- [36:47]
B
So. So one thing that I'm committing to is. Is reading outside of the typical genres that I read in. And you should be really excited about this because Michael and I, we love to read together. Another thing we do.
- [36:59]
A
Was it because this morning I crushed you in Trivial Pursuit and you thought you were gonna win, but your focus was too narrow?
- [37:04]
B
No, no. You knew questions about hello Kitty, though that did help.
- [37:08]
A
Yeah. I read vast and wide and far and long.
- [37:11]
B
Okay, well, I am not only going to keep my streak of reading every night, but I want to examine what I'm reading and make sure it's very broad. So that's sort of just like a New Year's resolution that I can implement every. Every day a little bit. I don't like to take on this huge sandwich by the way of a.
- [37:32]
A
Resolution as a tangent. Time out here. Anyone that reads Shogun and Lonesome Dove will write in and thank me later if you haven't read them already, because these are, like, some of the greatest works of our time.
- [37:45]
B
Okay?
- [37:45]
A
Right. And you're gonna. You're gonna read and be like, wow, I should have read that a lot earlier.
- [37:50]
B
Okay.
- [37:50]
A
I've read each of them three times. I love them so much. You can go back and read great books.
- [37:54]
B
So I'm just gonna really be mindful of what I'm reading this upcoming year.
- [38:00]
A
Your son's middle name is one of the names from the characters of Lonesome Dove.
- [38:03]
B
I picked it out.
- [38:04]
A
No, you. How would you pick it out if you've never read the book?
- [38:06]
B
I'll tell you how I picked it out. This is a true story. You guys. Do not believe him.
- [38:11]
A
This is unbelievable.
- [38:12]
B
I started reading Lonesome Dove, and I'm about 40 pages in, and I met the character Woodrow Call.
- [38:19]
A
No. Yes. But that's. But hold on. That's even better.
- [38:22]
B
I looked at you, and I said, we should name town's middle name Call.
- [38:26]
A
You know why it's worse?
- [38:27]
B
And you lit up, and then you rebranded it as your own idea.
- [38:30]
A
You know why it's worse?
- [38:31]
B
Why?
- [38:31]
A
Because you have no clue what that character did or what happened.
- [38:34]
B
You knew that that was your favorite book. So I was like, this is genius, Lauren.
- [38:38]
A
You know that character is a serial rapist.
- [38:41]
B
Ugh. Okay.
- [38:41]
A
I'm just kidding. It's not. But what if it was? It's not. But what if it was?
- [38:45]
B
What's next?
- [38:46]
A
See, Lauren? Fuck. See, you don't even know what's going on. This is. This is why you need to read the book.
- [38:51]
B
Okay, Go ahead.
- [38:51]
A
Hopefully that joke's not too off color. It's already in there. We're not editing it. Okay, my next one is that, you know, we've done all this work to figure out our intentions to set the year, to figure out our goals, to audit what's working and what's not doing. And then I have a note that I always talk. Talk about with people close to me. I say, it's now. It's time to rally the troops, the team, the support system, the people around you. I think if you just hold your goals and your aspirations inside, that's half the battle. But really, when you share your intentions and your goals and what you want to happen with people that are a true support system around you, that's when they actually start to manifest and become real. So a lot of things we're saying on this show, we're sharing to a very wide group of people. And now we're going to be held to account by that group. Group, which is you guys. I also think, you know, you see this work. When people start to get in the gym and they have a buddy system, someone they can train with, you start to see better results. If it's a reading. If it's a reading friend, you're in a book club, whatever it is. If you're in a company and you're with a group of people and you say you want to achieve a certain goal, if you're in a relationship, in a family, and you sit down as a family and say, this is what we want to happen. So it's important to speak these goals and intentions into the world and into people around you that actually care about you so that you can be held to account even for the negative things. Say you have maybe poor friendship patterns or poor dating habits. Saying what you won't do to people around you and asking them to help you through it is going to help you stay accountable to yourself. And so it's a very simple one, but it's basically speaking to the people around you, sharing your intentions, sharing your goals and. And letting people know that you expect to be held accountable to all of them.
- [40:29]
B
I kind of agree with you, but I kind of don't.
- [40:31]
A
Okay.
- [40:32]
B
What do you mean? I was talking about this to my trainer, Brent today. I'm not a fan of people that run around talking about what they're going to do without action. So while I.
- [40:41]
A
Well, that's different.
- [40:42]
B
Yes, but I also think, like, less talk, more action.
- [40:47]
A
Yes. I mean, listen, there is nothing worse than people just chatting and chatting and chatting.
- [40:52]
B
An idea. Just an idea is just an idea.
- [40:55]
A
We've covered that for many years on the show. If you're just. Just saying what you're gonna do or you're talking about how this guy or girl so terrible to you in the relationship and you're. You're not gonna. You're just droning on and on without making changes like.
- [41:06]
B
Or you're just. Or there's a business idea that we've been talking about since 2023.
- [41:10]
A
Yeah. No, the idea here is that again, this is why you have to share it with people that are actually your support system and actually care about you. If you're just saying things to people and they're not holding you to account or calling you on your. When you fall short of what you've said you're going to do, then those people don't really Care about you. They're not really your friends. Those are just.
- [41:26]
B
By the way, I. I also think this is important to say this. I'm. I've done this before. Multiple times. I remember. And I don't think we've ever told the story on the show. I was talking about launching this blog 14 years ago. I was talking about it all the time to Michael. I have this idea for this blog. It's going to be like this resource for women everywhere. It's going to have little tips and tricks and health ideas. And I would talk to him about it and talk to him about it. Finally, one day over oysters at Morton's, we were having chilled martinis with blue cheese, stuffed olives. You said, this is the last time I'm talking about it. Launch it. And I did. I did. But this is like when your back hurts. This is also like when your back hurts. You tell me your back hurts.
- [42:10]
A
It's not the same as when your.
- [42:11]
B
Back hurts a thousand times. My thing is, if your back hurts, let's put some systems in place. Place. Let's go lay on the pm.
- [42:18]
A
My back hurts. I'm carrying all your bullshit. Let's.
- [42:20]
B
Let's go get a body worker. Let's go get your back stretched. Let's get in the gym. Let's move. Let's get it together. Let's get some Ben gang in the back. Some fucking Tiger Bomb bitch. Let's get some systems to get your back feeling.
- [42:33]
A
It's not a good analogy, but I get where you're going with it.
- [42:35]
B
Okay. Is it my turn?
- [42:36]
A
No. But anyways. Yes. Okay. To wrap that up, though, you have to share these things with people that are going to hold you to account. If you have people that are just commiserating with you and listening to you share the same thing over and over without holding. Holding you to account, then it may be time to revisit that support group. Also, I had young sisters. I would watch them gossip with the gals. Is that what you call it? Over and over. And I would have to say, jordan, Tara, that girl's not your friend. She just wants to see you fall down. And I would have to tell her to step back from those kinds of people. So guys, girls, if you're just commiserating with people and you're never making change and they're just sitting there empathizing with all the time, like, maybe that's not what you need, once in a while it's okay to kind of get things out. But if it's all the Time over and over, and you're all both in the same place. It's time to switch friend groups.
- [43:15]
B
Anyways, my last and final one is I do this chart. I have done it every year for the last five years. Michael doesn't even know this. And it's called the more and less chart. And I've done this every single year. And what I do is on one side of the page it says more, and on the other side of the page it says less. And I write what I want more of this year and what I want less of. This could be anything from that. You want less alcohol, you want less toxic friends, you want. You want more time on your calendar, you want more space on your calendar, you want less housewives. Whatever it is, you make a more and less. And you write down everything in a very granular way. So it's not like broad things. It's actually very specific. And sometimes my list has like 50 on each side. And every single time where I need like my compass straightened. Is it a compass? My leveler straightened? I don't know what, like a picture leveler. A leveler, yeah. Every time I want my leveler straightened throughout the year or I need clarity, I go back to that list and I just look at it. And you can literally take a picture of it and put it on the background of your phone. You can just have it on your phone in your favorite section. So you can constantly just remind yourself of where you're going and who the you are.
- [44:36]
A
Got it. I will just say this one last time on this episode because I just wanted to be honest. If I miss anything here, I am a much better communicator when I can look at someone in the eyes.
- [44:45]
B
So on your list you can write less side view, more straight up.
- [44:50]
A
We are trained to, when we have interactions with people, to look them in the eyes so that you can listen to them clearly. So I.
- [44:58]
B
You know what I say to that? Let them.
- [45:01]
A
I think I kept up, but okay. This is the last one on the list, guys. I think it's interesting. It's different. I've only done it once or twice because I just. It came to me again. I will not take credit for it. I am a huge fan or. Or am still was fan of Charlie Munger, rest his soul. He just passed and I've read a bunch of his work and I follow him and I like his speeches and I just think he's got a ton of wisdom. So anyways, he wrote something along the lines of write your own obituary. And then Live in that way. Meaning like he was saying, if you were to write your own obituary about what you want people to say at the end of your life, have you written yours? No. No. So I'll get to the point. Okay, I should write it, so don't derail me here. So he was saying, write your own obituary and then live. So like, for example, if someone said, oh, he was a loving husband that was faithful and treated everybody like all these things, then it's really easy to kind of live in that way. You wouldn't live counter to your obituary. It, I think for the year in the third person right now, this month, you could write a summary of what you would want people to say about you at the end of this year. So in my case, you could say, hey, Michael Bostic was such a great businessman this year. He stayed so focused. He managed all of his stuff without stress. He still took care of himself, was you could write all of this stuff down. I'm just giving you an example. And essentially, if you write that, it sets again the intention for the year, because now you're held to account. And then I think periodically, if you have that written down in your journal or on your computer or on your phone app or whatever it may be, you could refer to what you would want a third party to write about you from an accomplishment and a human perspective at the end of this year. And then again, you just act accordingly. So a lot of the advice that I've been giving on this episode is actually just to get in the mindset, to create the identity that you need in order to execute against your vision and your goals. Again, something else I won't take credit for. If you read Atomic Habits from Is it James Clear? Who? Jim? Want him on the show? He says that it's much easier to adopt a habit when you take on an identity. And so you can't just set a goal or say you want to do a habit without also taking on that identity. So again, like some of the examples use is like, I want to be. I'm going to be a healthy person. So then you can live the way a healthy person would. I want to be a great career person or business person, then you could live that way. And I think the same thing here. You just, you write down this summary of what you want someone to say about you at the end of the year. And then you just live in that way with that intention and with that identity.
- [47:26]
B
Happy New Year.
- [47:27]
A
Happy New Year, everybody. Thank you for listening, watching.
- [47:31]
B
Tell us what the best time of the year is on my latest post.
- [47:37]
A
I thought you were saying that to me because it's the first time.
- [47:38]
B
No, I want to know what everyone thinks. The best time of the year to have time to yourself to do a think week is January 2nd to the 7th. Tell me if I'm wrong.
- [47:46]
A
Lauren, I'm again gonna. Just like you are. Living in the clouds.
- [47:51]
B
Everyone that Carson agrees with me in.
- [47:53]
A
A company is getting bombarded on the second.
- [47:56]
B
They're not, though. Everyone is burnt out. They're tired. It's. It's like they just.
- [48:00]
A
Why are they tired? They just took a long break, kind.
- [48:02]
B
Of a hibernation period. They didn't take a break if they're around their family the entire time making small talk with Aunt Fran.
- [48:08]
A
But that's why. Sorry, but that's why you get the break after making small talk.
- [48:12]
B
Listen, I'm gonna go ask the entire office right now. I said it.
- [48:16]
A
You get the small talk done on Jan on Dec 27.
- [48:19]
B
By the way, I'm going to beat Michael's ass in trivia tonight.
- [48:22]
A
No, you're not. Thank you, everybody. Appreciate you all. Happy New Year.