Bethenny Frankel On Strategies For Success, How To Transform Your Life, Highs & Lows, & Lessons From Reality TV

Summary

Podcast Summary: The Skinny Confidential Him & Her Podcast featuring Bethenny Frankel

Introduction

In this engaging episode of The Skinny Confidential Him & Her Podcast, hosts Lauryn Bosstick and Michael Bosstick sit down with Bethenny Frankel, a multifaceted entrepreneur, TV producer, bestselling author, philanthropist, and social media influencer. Bethenny shares her journey from a turbulent childhood to becoming a powerhouse in the business and entertainment industries, offering listeners invaluable insights into success strategies, personal transformation, and the lessons learned from reality TV.

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1. Navigating Podcast Interviews and Competitive Dynamics

Bethenny opens the conversation by discussing her experiences being interviewed by men and the underlying competitive nature she perceives. She highlights how some male hosts attempt to "big dick" her—asserting their dominance through money or status—rather than genuinely engaging in meaningful dialogue.

• Notable Quote:
  "They do try to big dick you with like money and things. Do you know what I'm talking about?" — Bethenny Frankel [02:18]

Bethenny emphasizes her ability to outshine these attempts, asserting her confidence and competence in any setting.

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2. Defining the Ideal Partner and Challenges in Dating

The discussion shifts to Bethenny's criteria for an ideal dating partner. She seeks individuals in adjacent or entirely different business arenas to prevent subtle competition and maintain a balanced relationship dynamic.

• Notable Quote:
  "Someone has to be from a different planet, but successful on their planet where they think this stuff that I'm doing is silly." — Bethenny Frankel [03:21]

She articulates the complexities of dating successful individuals who may feel overshadowed, leading to potential relationship strains.

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3. Overcoming a Turbulent Childhood

Bethenny delves into her challenging upbringing at racetracks, highlighting the instability of attending multiple schools and the absence of a steady parental figure. Despite these hardships, she developed a strong sense of control and resilience.

• Notable Quote:
  "No two days were the same... gambling very young, drinking very young, do drugs young... but because I was always sort of in control as an adult." — Bethenny Frankel [07:36]

She credits her self-reliance and analytical nature for her adaptability and success.

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4. Early Entrepreneurial Ventures and Reality TV Experience

Bethenny reflects on her unintentional entrepreneurial spirit from a young age, engaging in ventures like renting hotel rooms and hosting parties to generate income without recognizing her innate business acumen.

Her participation in reality TV, notably The Apprentice and The Real Housewives, served as significant turning points. She discusses the balance between authenticity and the performative aspects of reality television.

• Notable Quote:
  "It was myself while battling with Ramona about things that don't matter... I just wish I could be myself." — Bethenny Frankel [14:01]

Bethenny underscores the importance of staying true to oneself amidst the scripted environment of reality TV.

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5. Mastering Social Media and Authentic Branding

Bethenny shares her candid approach to social media, favoring spontaneous content over highly edited posts. She contrasts platforms like Instagram, which she likens to a controlled lobby environment, with TikTok, a more dynamic and unpredictable space.

• Notable Quote:
  "TikTok is the ultimate reality show... I just shoot it. Like I'm directing and producing it and editing it... it's lean and put it up." — Bethenny Frankel [15:37]

Her strategy emphasizes authenticity, speed, and minimal editing, allowing her genuine personality to resonate with her audience.

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6. Strategic Business Growth and Investing

Discussing her business philosophy, Bethenny emphasizes the importance of adaptability and learning from each venture. She illustrates her approach through examples like her decision to halt the launch of overpriced bathing suits after genuine customer feedback.

• Notable Quote:
  "Everyone's got to suit up right now. I need all sizes, all shapes." — Bethenny Frankel [23:59]

Her narrative highlights the significance of integrity and responsiveness in business operations.

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7. Effective Philanthropy and Charity Management

Bethenny introduces her philanthropic initiative, Be Strong, focusing on efficient and transparent allocation of funds to rebuild lives and communities. She criticizes the traditional charity model for its lack of transparency and emphasizes her commitment to ensuring every dollar directly benefits those in need.

• Notable Quote:
  "Be Strong. 100% goes to the effort... How are you spending those grants?" — Bethenny Frankel [90:05]

Her approach advocates for accountability and impactful philanthropy.

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8. Conflict Management and Personal Resilience

Bethenny discusses her proactive approach to conflict, preferring to stay close to the "fire" without getting engulfed. She shares personal anecdotes, including her interactions with Meghan Markle, illustrating her straightforward and sometimes blunt communication style.

• Notable Quote:
  "What I get for getting into the fire is never gonna be worth it." — Bethenny Frankel [54:01]

Her resilience and no-nonsense attitude underscore her ability to navigate and manage conflicts effectively.

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9. Insights on Marriage, Relationships, and Emotional Intelligence

A significant portion of the conversation revolves around the dynamics of marriage and relationships. Bethenny advocates for clear agreements, such as prenups, and emphasizes understanding each partner's emotional styles and attachment mechanisms.

• Notable Quote:
  "I would say you're going to have to do a prenup no matter what... things should be written down a way." — Bethenny Frankel [71:09]

She highlights the necessity of pragmatic approaches to ensure relationship success and stability.

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10. Balancing Motherhood and Entrepreneurship

Bethenny candidly addresses the challenges of being a devoted mother while managing multiple business ventures. She emphasizes the importance of not feeling guilty for pursuing professional aspirations and maintaining a presence in her daughter's life through quality time rather than constant availability.

• Notable Quote:
  "You're supposed to be working and you're supposed to be parenting. And you're not supposed to feel guilty about it because it's wasted..." — Bethenny Frankel [78:38]

Her philosophy centers on balance, presence, and prioritizing meaningful interactions with her children.

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Conclusion

This episode of The Skinny Confidential Him & Her Podcast offers a deep dive into Bethenny Frankel's multifaceted life, blending personal anecdotes with professional insights. From overcoming a challenging childhood to mastering the art of authentic branding and balancing motherhood with entrepreneurship, Bethenny provides a blueprint for achieving success without compromising one's integrity. Her candid discussions on relationships, philanthropy, and conflict management further enrich the conversation, making this episode a valuable resource for listeners seeking inspiration and practical advice to enhance their own lives.

Highlighted Quotes:

• "They do try to big dick you with like money and things. Do you know what I'm talking about?" — Bethenny Frankel [02:18]
• "Someone has to be from a different planet, but successful on their planet where they think this stuff that I'm doing is silly." — Bethenny Frankel [03:21]
• "No two days were the same... gambling very young, drinking very young, do drugs young... but because I was always sort of in control as an adult." — Bethenny Frankel [07:36]
• "TikTok is the ultimate reality show... I just shoot it. Like I'm directing and producing it and editing it... it's lean and put it up." — Bethenny Frankel [15:37]
• "Be Strong. 100% goes to the effort... How are you spending those grants?" — Bethenny Frankel [90:05]
• "I would say you're going to have to do a prenup no matter what... things should be written down a way." — Bethenny Frankel [71:09]
• "You're supposed to be working and you're supposed to be parenting. And you're not supposed to feel guilty about it because it's wasted..." — Bethenny Frankel [78:38]

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This comprehensive summary encapsulates the essence of the conversation, providing a structured and insightful overview of Bethenny Frankel's experiences and philosophies as discussed in the podcast episode.

Transcript

[Lauren Everts]

The following podcast is a Dear Media Production.

[Michael Bostick]

She's a lifestyle blogger extraordinaire.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Fantastic.

[Michael Bostick]

And he's a serial entrepreneur, a very smart cookie. And now Lauren Everts and Michael Bostick.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Are bringing you along for the ride.

[Unknown]

Get ready for some major realness.

[Michael Bostick]

Welcome to the Skinny Confidential.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Him and her.

[Unknown]

An icon is gracing us with her presence today on the show. Bethany Frankel. She is a self made business person, TV producer, podcast host, multiple New York Times best selling author, philanthropist, social media influencer, and most importantly, a mother. She is a superstar, powerhouse, role model, example, in my opinion, for women. And it was so fun this episode to ask her how she deals with mom guilt, her beauty tips, her housewife secrets. We also got a little juice on the TikTok of it all. And also we learned about her branding, how she thinks about business, and of course, she was brutally honest, which was so. Welcome, Bethany Frankel. Welcome to the him and her show.

[Michael Bostick]

This is the Skinny Confidential.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Him and her. Bethenny Frankel, what were you just saying before?

[Unknown]

I notice when men interview you, there's this undertone of like they're trying to compete with you.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Is that what you said during the break before the show that's there.

[Lauren Everts]

You use the term.

[Michael Bostick]

They try to big dick.

[Unknown]

Thank you.

[Bethenny Frankel]

They were the baby in you. It's weird. I thought it was creepy too, but no, it's fine. He said it, you didn't.

[Unknown]

Yeah, they do try to big dick you with like money and things. Do you know what I'm talking about?

[Bethenny Frankel]

I don't, but I'd like to hear. But I don't. I don't notice the difference between men and women. I know it sounds crazy, but everyone's like, how is it difficult for you? I'm like, I don't know. I thought I was a man. I don't know. Like, I never noticed any of these things. So I want you to educate me, explain.

[Unknown]

Like, I think when you go on someone's podcast who's famous and has a lot of money, let's say, okay, and it's a guy, they're a little bit intimidated by you. And so what they do is instead of interviewing you, they end up trying to tell you what they have.

[Bethenny Frankel]

I have to fucking go. Because this is my dating life.

[Michael Bostick]

They have to. First they have to make sure that you know that they're on the level.

[Bethenny Frankel]

I kind of wish they would do it more in dating, actually. Now that I think because I'm not dating the guys on the level, so the other guys come in with Like a decent resume. And then all of a sudden they freak out at like, who. Who's calling me on the day to day and the deals that I'm doing. So I'm absolutely fucked. I'm fucked in my personal life. I don't care. On the podcast. That's fine. They can big dick me. I can be. I can out big dick anybody on a podcast. That's so they do it when I'm on.

[Unknown]

When you're on a date with them.

[Michael Bostick]

You can out big dick me. It's okay.

[Bethenny Frankel]

I wish that I would like them to. I would like to be out big dicked on a date. That's what I'd like. That's what I'm looking for. That's gonna be on my dating profile. Please, out big dick me.

[Michael Bostick]

What do they come in? They're just like too submissive or they're shy or they're intimidated.

[Bethenny Frankel]

No.

[Michael Bostick]

Threatened.

[Bethenny Frankel]

No, they're just like, they're normal successful people. And then I realized that's not gonna work.

[Michael Bostick]

So what is, like, what is your ideal dating partner look like? What do they need to do?

[Bethenny Frankel]

Glad you asked. Been honing this like a piece of coal into a diamond. So you're, you're okay. So I'm. I'm really glad you asked. So right now what I've is that someone has to be in sort of an adjacent business. They have to understand what I'm doing. Ish. Like they're not a Martian. But they should not be in this business that I'm in or even adjacent. Cause here's what happens. I'll be dating someone and they're successful. They've done successful things, very successful things. But let's say they just want to like, dabble. They want to maybe get a podcast or they want to talk to somebody about investing in a company or they're interested in some VC stuff. It becomes a situation where people are coming to me and handing me on a silver platter. VC stuff. Because they also know that I could move the needle. So not only do I fit what this person who has money, this normal rich person has, where they can invest in something, but the person doesn't really want them. They want me because I could move the needle. Or like I could just call anybody and get any TV show or get on any like, news show. So it becomes someone has to be from a different planet, but successful on their planet where they think this stuff that I'm doing is silly.

[Michael Bostick]

So it's complimentary, but it's not like crossing over because Essentially, you get into, like, a competition with them, and then they feel bad about themselves.

[Bethenny Frankel]

It's not. It's a subtle competition. We're not actually competing. But it makes them think more about what they're doing and they feel worse about themselves. Yes. So that part. And that has happened with the wealthiest of people. And it's so shocking to me because I come in with a high bar and then they're like. One person said to me, wow. No, like, you really. You really have inspired me. You've really got me thinking. And now I really want to do this. And what do you think of this? And now we're in a mentorship program or. And this is a wealthy, successful person. Okay. Like, well over $100 million. Okay, well, so then another person was just like, no, I just feel like the people you know and the opportunities you have, and like, I had a hit, but, like, I haven't had my next thing, and now I really want to find my next. So, like, now we're in a different version of a mentorship program, so it's not very sexy. It's. It's just. It makes me feel self conscious. Cause I start not saying what I'm doing because I feel like it's going to intimidate them. Or I start. I start watering it down. I'd be like, no. Yes. What you're doing is the same exact thing as what I'm doing. Like, we're the same. Like, I. I want. I feel bad about what I'm doing, so I want to either gatekeep it or, like, rise them up and like, babysit them and make them feel like what they're doing is the same. And, like. And then I start to include them in things. Oh, well, no, this investment would be amazing, and I think you'd be amazing. And I start putting them on with people for my team because, like, I start to think they'd add value. But I'm just doing it because I want to, like, give them an opportunity.

[Unknown]

I feel like you need someone who's really quietly confident.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

It's a very particular person.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Word.

[Unknown]

And the problem is you can't really call your girlfriends for advice of where to go, because it's just such a unique. You're so driven and so ambitious. And you say it on your podcast too. You're like, on to the next, on to the next. Like, you're moving, you're grooving. And I think it's gotta take a real strong guy. It's too bad you're not a lesbian.

[Bethenny Frankel]

No, because then it would take all your clothes, although I have so many now because of this new gatekeeper, this new influencer stuff. So that would be. Yeah, no, I don't think. Think I'd be good. I also don't like the hardware. I don't think I'd be a good lesbian. But we're getting close. We've got. We've got a lot of good prospects right now. We're getting. We're getting closer to the nucleus.

[Unknown]

It's a diamond in the rough.

[Bethenny Frankel]

I don't know.

[Unknown]

It's out there. It's out there.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Oh, I know. I'm not. I'm not worried. It's out there. We just gotta.

[Unknown]

I feel like you have a line.

[Bethenny Frankel]

What you just got.

[Unknown]

You have a line of guys like, you just gotta.

[Bethenny Frankel]

I have a. I have a nice little roster. Yeah, it's okay.

[Unknown]

That's great.

[Bethenny Frankel]

We'll see.

[Unknown]

Where did this personality come from? Have you always had this personality since you were a little girl?

[Bethenny Frankel]

I think so, yeah, for the most part. And I. I was raised by. Well, I wasn't really raised, but I was surrounded by very interesting, colorful characters of the racetrack, which is a crazy place.

[Unknown]

You've talked a lot about your childhood on your podcast. In the racetrack. What was, what was your childhood like? Explain it to us for someone who has no idea.

[Bethenny Frankel]

It's very hard to explain because it's. No two days were the same, but I went to like 13 schools and I was an adult as a child, so I was sort of gambling very young, drinking very young, do drugs young, not a lot, but because I was always sort of in control as an adult, but going to nightclubs very young at the racetrack as like summer camp. Hanging out with the jockeys in the jockeys room, like just not where the way and saw a lot of crazy stuff in the house that people don't normally see. So I definitely had a very advanced childhood, let's say.

[Michael Bostick]

And were your parents together?

[Bethenny Frankel]

My. Not. My mother was with a few people. So she was my real father, then my stepfather than someone else who wasn't really. I wasn't really around that much. But then my stepfather, I was with him. And then my mother was away living in Wales, having like an affair and then she went away to a facility like.

[Michael Bostick]

And so how did you manage that as a child? Was this something where you kind of like went in or did you start to kind of have exploitive behavior and like lash out or like, how do you remember?

[Bethenny Frankel]

I was always the way I am now. I'M sure there are like different versions like of more heightened, more manic, more. But I've always been on like analytical and in some version of control and managing a situation. So I never. I've never had a crazy phase. I've never had a promiscuous phase. I've never had a drug phase. I've never had a acting out phase. Oddly, I'm pretty well adjusted for a person who had a childhood like I did.

[Michael Bostick]

Was there somebody in your life when you were younger that kind of was your North Star and kind of helped you manage all of that?

[Bethenny Frankel]

No, no, it's always been me. It's always been like me and my mind and analysis and thinking and processing. I think I've always been attracted to some version of self help.

[Unknown]

Do you think that a lot of.

[Bethenny Frankel]

The way reasons literally self help, like self help. Like me helping self. So yeah. Sorry, what are you gonna say?

[Unknown]

I was just gonna say, do you think don' that the reason you are the way you are and all these things that you have. A lot of it probably comes from that.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Of course. Yes, yes, for sure. Just like surviving. Yeah, surviving.

[Unknown]

What are some happy moments with your mother? Because you've talked about her on kind of both ends. She sounds like you. She sounds like you didn't know what you were gonna get.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Well, it's very. Well, you guys have kid. Two kids and one on the way. It's very interesting because the way that my daughter really idolizes me, the way that she looks up to me and we're very different and I'm definitely a good mother. So it's not the same. But I remember feeling that way about my mother just because she was so smart and she was absolutely stunning and she was. She was just very sharp and quick witted and she could take over a room. So I remember being very like enamored by that. She had a very mercurial, crazy, dysfunctional, destructive side. Self destructive most, but really just not parental more. It's like living with some crazy. It's very much like the TV show Firefly Lane.

[Unknown]

I've never seen it.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Yeah, it's with. I forgot. What was her name. That's going to drive me nuts, guys. What's the woman's name? The actress had a bad reputation for a minute. What's her. Katherine Heigl. And there's another character in there that has like a mother that's just not, you know, like a kid, A mother, A child from the 60s. So anyway, my friend was like, they stole your life story for that show. So it's just crazy times. And it was the 70s also. So that does. That. That does account for a little bit of it. But, you know, a lot of craziness, for sure.

[Unknown]

Where did your work ethic start? Do you remember, like, your first job? What. What were your. Your. Your sort of, like, your ambition? Where does this all come from?

[Bethenny Frankel]

I don't think I knew that I was ambitious. And I don't. We didn't have these words like entrepreneurial and brand and any of this stuff. So I don't think I knew that I was different than anyone else until later, when I do have to give Kim Kardashian her flowers for saying most people don't wanna work. Cause I did kind of come at her for that moment. Cause the way it landed was wrong with, like, it was pandemic, I think. And it was, like, people feeling insulted by it. But I think the essence of what she was saying is true because I just don't think that most people really work that hard. It's not that I don't think it. It's that I know it. And so I just don't think I thought about it as a kid. Now, looking back, I realize when I wanted to have at my house and I went to go work at the bakery and when I was selling things and when I found. When my friend told the story that I forgot about that I used to charge people to come to. I would rent hotel rooms of money I didn't have, charge people to come and host big parties and, you know, make money off of it. Like, I was entrepreneurial, young, but I didn't have a name for it. And I didn't even know that I was different than anyone else. But now looking back, I could think of a bunch of different ways of making things, selling things, doing things that were entrepreneurial. But I did not think about it then. I just. I guess.

[Unknown]

And you were Paris and Nikki's nanny.

[Bethenny Frankel]

And I was Paris and Nikki's nanny.

[Unknown]

And you worked at La Scala.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Well, and I worked at La Scala and I worked for Linda and Jerry Bruckheimer, and I worked for Lorne Michaels, and I worked for Chris Blackwell and Mark Burt. Like, yeah, I just always. Because I've always been a hustler, but that is probably from the racetrack. And so I don't know where the work ethic comes from. My real father that I didn't spend much time with was a Hall of Fame horse trainer. And he was very driven, for one thing, which is very different than me. But so I don't know, but I think I might have been born this way. I don't know.

[Unknown]

You said in one of your podcast episodes that you were, like, trying out and you were going on auditions and you were getting jobs, like, you're saved by the bell job, but you wanted something where you could play yourself, which is so funny now with what you do.

[Bethenny Frankel]

It's. With what I did also. It's gotten even more deep. Right. It was crazy on reality tv, which isn't really totally reality, and you're only playing yourself within the context of what's going on with the other people. That's not real life. So you are yourself, but you're yourself as an alien dropped on Mars.

[Unknown]

Right.

[Bethenny Frankel]

That's not really yourself. But so. But it was myself while, you know, battling with Ramona about things that don't matter. So. Yeah. So I remember auditioning and saying, I just wish I could be myself. And I thought that that's what hosting was. But then I realized hosting was also, like, not being yourself. You're kind of scripted and like, hey, what do you wear? Like, that's less myself than being even probably in a Lifetime movie. So I just find it interesting that it was a foreshadowing to reality TV, which did not exist then, and TikTok, big time, and TikTok, which is the ultimate reality show. And that's what nobody. That's what people really don't realize.

[Unknown]

That's why you've kind of won the game, I think. A big part of it.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Well, because I really. Yes, I. And I. Even within TikTok, like, there's a whole world of editing and filtering and cutting and producing. That's within social media, which I also don't do. Like, I'll do something. That Cadillac that got dropped in the driveway, I walked outside. Five minutes later, there was a video that was up on the worldwide interwebs. Like, I don't have time for editing. My team. If it's maybe for something for a brand or if it's like something long and bulky, it went too long. Or something was in the middle that I couldn't get out because I. But I just shoot it. Like. Like I'm directing and producing it and editing it, and then it's lean and put it up.

[Unknown]

I think people don't realize how produced a lot of social media is. Someone was, like, asking me how I would explain it to my daughter when she's older, and I'm gonna tell her it's a movie set. There's. There's an Actor, there's a director, there's lighting, there's production.

[Bethenny Frankel]

In many cases, it's like, you can't.

[Unknown]

It's not. There's a lot of ele. Are not real. And I think maybe you coming on the app, it was refreshing to a lot of people.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Well, my own good friends that are like, you know, my age are just like, talk to each other, like, what the fuck is she doing? Like, they like. I have friends who will be like, my. I have a friend who's talking about her friend who I also know who's like, she doesn't like anyone. She hates everyone. But I think. And she's a little insecure. She's like, I think she just feels better because of what a fucking train wreck you look like. I'm like, okay, thank you. So I guess people are just shocked that I will. Am willing to, like, look like I look on social media.

[Unknown]

Don't you? Kind of. I kind of of love, like, looking really ugly for Michael for long periods of time. And then all of a sudden I dress up.

[Bethenny Frankel]

I get that.

[Unknown]

And then he's like. It's like, remember who I married, bitch.

[Bethenny Frankel]

I. I get that. Actually not.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Like, there's. With someone that I was dating. And then like, on the nights that we would go out, if I had, like, a big thing and I would be decked out, I'd be like, I know, this is really good. So you'll live off of this for a while.

[Unknown]

Exactly.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Rotisserie chicken. We're gonna make a stock. We're going to make chicken salad. We're going to eat the big bread.

[Michael Bostick]

Yeah, but if I did that, you would be.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Yeah, no. Well, there's a ton of double standards. I've been talking about the icks all over my social media. Yeah. If you ate overnight oats, your penis would shrink overnight. Like, no, no, no. Overnight. Don't even talk about.

[Unknown]

Made overnight oats before.

[Michael Bostick]

Wow, it's been a while.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Yeah. And don't do it regularly. One. Not even once.

[Michael Bostick]

This is not me big.

[Unknown]

You actually bought a contraption to make overnight.

[Michael Bostick]

There was a period of time when I thought that that was something you did, but no, didn't last long.

[Bethenny Frankel]

And she could do. She could bathe in overnight oats overnight. She could sleep in overnight oats overnight. But you can't even look at them. Yeah, you can't order.

[Unknown]

I do, like, like looking ugly for a while and then reminding you that is a good tip. I. I don't think you can look hot all the time. It's Kind of boring.

[Bethenny Frankel]

It's like having pizza every day. You're gonna get sick of it.

[Unknown]

Right?

[Bethenny Frankel]

100.

[Unknown]

What was your.

[Bethenny Frankel]

No. Or just look. Right? Or if he starts, like, slacking, just look unattractive and then just look attractive when other people are around, you know, really torture.

[Michael Bostick]

I don't keep. I don't slack. I don't. I don't slack.

[Unknown]

No, he doesn't slack. He's kind of like. He's got his own style going on. Okay, what was your first touch with reality television?

[Bethenny Frankel]

The Apprentice.

[Unknown]

Right, Right. With Marcus. Martha Stewart.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Correct.

[Unknown]

What was that like?

[Bethenny Frankel]

It was unlike anything I had ever done, because I remember the first time walking into that loft and looking into the camera and then be like, you don't look into the camera. Like, it just was. It was like gazing into the camera. It was amazing because it was a true competition. And it was like, get the fuck out of my way, everybody. Like, it was a true competition. And so it was a good training for just, like, this industry life. Like, you just don't look to the left or the right. Like, you're looking at that wall in front of you. You don't worry about what anyone else is doing, creating, whatever. And so. And also, like, business and other parts of life, you have to get your footing. You know, the first couple of tasks, you don't realize where you are. You're sleep deprived, you're not alert, and then all of a sudden, you just kick in. And who can survive? Like, some people are good closers, which I certainly am, but some people peak in the beginning, just like people who peak in high school. Look at them now. So it's a marathon, baby.

[Unknown]

And how did you know all of this going into it? Is it just innate?

[Bethenny Frankel]

I think I've always had a fairly confident opinion of my. I've always thought I was going somewhere and doing something, but I was also in my late 30s, and it still wasn't happening. I still don't know that I ever doubted it. I never thought of age, and I still. What? You have two choices. You'd be positive, and you think something's coming and happening, something bad happens, you brush yourself off, and that's what you do. That's. I've always been like that.

[Michael Bostick]

I say on this show, like, you know, over the years, I've said, like, the way that I talk to myself sometimes is, like, borderline. Like, if you heard the way in my head, you're like, man, this guy's like, area. But I always. But I think, like, if I don't talk like that. Nobody else is going to do it for me. And I'm like, I'm my personal biggest fan. And I feel like that's what I feel. And I feel, you know, people apologize for that. And I think when I look at you, I can. And you're telling the story, and I'm thinking about guys you date. Like, you're so unapologetically that way. To me, it's very refreshing.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Yeah, I don't think we should be dumbing anything down. The whole world will be a better place.

[Michael Bostick]

But, you know, people try to do that to themselves. They try to. They, like, you know, try to diminish their accomplishments totally. You know, like, try to not say how they. You know, and they, like, they're scared to, like, cheerlead for themselves or even, dare I say, brag in order of maybe the way they might come off to people. But I'm like, well, if you're not going to be confident and you're not going to have that kind of inner cheerleader, like, who the hell else is?

[Bethenny Frankel]

Well, also. So there's a couple of versions of that. So there's one person recently I was speaking to who was talking about good things happening. They're like, oh, no. They think they're going to jinx it. I'm like, what do you know? Like, what do you mean? No, there's a. There's a set of waves. There could be one wave, but there could be 10. So double down, triple down. You're in it now. You're in the fucking zone. Keep going. Like, what do you mean now? Bad thing. But I always think the wolves are at the end of the bed, so I am always ready. I'm always. I'm not. I don't get too big for my britches. I don't like when things are going too well. I like there to be a certain fair and level level. But I don't, like. Not that I'm. Not that I'm keeping it down. The success can be there, but it's just like, everyone, calm the fuck down. And now we gotta be more serious and more careful about everything. So. But I also think people who. Something exciting's coming, or they think it might, and then they want to dilute that excitement. I'm like, why? If it doesn't happen, you'll be equally as miserable for whether you got excited or didn't. So you might as well have the excitement in the beginning. Yeah, but it doesn't happen. You had. You had that moment. You thought it was Happening versus being negative. And then it not happening.

[Michael Bostick]

But it sounds like. It's like you have this confidence that you're prepared for whatever is coming. Does that make sense?

[Bethenny Frankel]

Yeah.

[Michael Bostick]

Good or bad?

[Bethenny Frankel]

Like, no. And when you've got that, you can't underestimate when the wave is cresting and you're hitting your stride, you, you got it. You got to really press your bets. Things change very quickly. You have to get the momentum. You have a tiny, tiny ember, like the tight. You fly with that. You, you, you do it. You keep going. And you are be shocked and how much you could turn that into. But people start to think it's the lights going out a little and then they like close up shop early. It's like we are staying to the fucking last minute of that store open. Someone might come in and buy something at the last minute.

[Michael Bostick]

Was there a moment in your life when you realized that you could think that way or behave that way? Like, did something happen? Or was there something you accomplished where you're like, oh, I got it. And this is the formula for life.

[Bethenny Frankel]

It's just case law. It's not formula for life. It's each time something happens, you look back at that last thing that happens and you add something, subtract something, you made a mistake. It's case law. It's why lawyers can seem so smart in something going on right now when they're not that smart. They're just taking different pieces of things that have happened. It's just case law.

[Unknown]

What are some moments that the wolves have been at the end of the bed, like, reflect back on your huge career. What are some moments?

[Bethenny Frankel]

The moments that there was a moment that something happened on social media where I thought it was real because a bunch of people are saying something, and in the moment it feels real. But the regular outside world, because certain social media is a series of different planets. And people that don't live on any of the planets think that it's just one whole solar system, like, which it is. But they don't realize that they're all very different. And so you could think something's going on one place and believe not only your own bullshit, but believe your own demise. So there was. But still, that's, That's a great point because a crack can become a crater. So you see something going on in one place, you gotta take care of it. You gotta take care of it. So something's happening at one area of your. That could turn into like mold, a flood. You don't know, like one little Thing you see you have to take care of. So that's a wolf. But it doesn't have to be. And then that happens with. It's happened with products, you know, anybody. Like, there could be something that I recommended that I posted a link to that people are buying, and one woman. One woman will say, I ordered this two weeks ago. And they said it was immediate. Whatever, I'll send it to my team, be like, send her something. And. Because whatever she is, what if 10 people had that experience? You just don't know. So I. One person is too many.

[Unknown]

You mentioned a story where you said, like, you were about to launch $40,000 in bathing suits, and you pulled it. Talk to us about that.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Oh, yeah, that's. That's. I don't know that I thought that was a wolf. It's just a pride and integrity. I don't lie. I don't lie. And so I was going on HSN to launch bathing suits, and I had a WW Women's Wear Daily article had already been published, which is the fashion bible. So now that's been published about my amazing bathing suits. I was partners with a great, credible partner, very, very wealthy, successful person and massive business. And it was during the pandemic, so we were doing a lot of the fittings by Zoom, and they didn't get the samples to me until day two, days before we were going on television. And I told them the things to fix so were going on. And I put the bathing suits on at my house, and I'm like, this is shit. Like, this is, like, a big, like, fucking scuba suit. And it's uncomfortable. And women already feel so uncomfortable wearing bathing suits to begin with to trying. And it's a traumatic experience. Jeans are traumatic experience. Bathing suits is like, rest of your life in therapy. So I put them on, and I had women raging in angels in my business from, like, 24 to, like, 50s. And I'm like, everyone's got to fucking suit up right now. I need all sizes, all shapes. Everybody's got to suit all. All booby sizes. Everyone's got to suit up. Privately, I apologize and let me know if I'm right, if this thing is shit. They were all, like, dying. And so I call my business manager, and he's like, absolutely not. No, absolutely not. I think it was 60,000. He's like, we have $60,000 in image. Absolutely not. You're going on at HSN&WW. I'm like, HSN's not gonna want me to sell shit. They're gonna have to deal with returning it. They return stuff. They don't care. So I go, I'm not. I got into a massive fight with them. We're cursing each other. I'm like, absolutely not. I'm not launching these fucking bathing suits. They'll never have you on again. I go, I don't care. I'm not. He said, it's okay. We'll sell them in an offline. I go, oh, so we're going to sell them to cheaper so poor people get to look like shit. They go to tj. What are you talking about? So it was a big fight and I was stressed out and we had to do an Instagram live about it. And I just did an Instagram live about it that I'm not doing it. And we were gonna get sued and I already had knew I was gonna eat the 60,000, so we were gonna get sued by this partner. So I was in the COVID your ass mode. And I said, okay, this is just my personality. I said, all right. I need to speak to the head person who dresses all the models at hsn. Cause they had already put them all on. I go, you guys got those bathing suits and you try everything on. I need you to go back. I need you to talk to the models. And what they said was, when we went back. Cause it was before, before going on. It wasn't like days before. When we went back, the models, the entire model room was cheering. They did not want to go out because there's all shapes and sizes there too. They were cheering. They did not want to go out wearing these bathing suits. I was like, period.

[Unknown]

So you are 100% right with that one.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Yeah, I was. It's just like, that's a crack that becomes a crater.

[Unknown]

You're you. I feel like you. One of your best talents is feeling the pulse. Like, you feel. You feel the energy. You feel the pulse and you maneuver within that and pivot within that. Does that make sense?

[Bethenny Frankel]

Yeah. No. No. But that's again, the ocean that's knowing, like when to. Yeah.

[Michael Bostick]

You go, yeah, but it's a self awareness too. A lot of people don't have, especially on social. Like our business is. Is being in the social world. And there's sometimes people go along and there's like a complete lack of awareness of like what's actually happening. Happening.

[Bethenny Frankel]

No. And even within myself. I'll tell everybody. What? I'll tell everybody the day. Tick tock. Shutting down what we're doing differently. Everyone's like, that doesn't work on Instagram. I'M like, I don't give a. Today's the day. We're changing that. Or I'll be like, no, it's enough of this shit. We need a cleanse. We need something stupid. Like, it's a pace. It's like you're running a network and you know, like, put in that that's not gonna work today. We gotta fill it in with that. Like we were doing this programming. You can't just go by the programming.

[Michael Bostick]

But you know, it's like, it's. Why, like, I guess, like, I'll use the term influencer. So many people get in trouble so they don't read the temperature of the room. And like the vibe has shifted. I mean, there's been a few vibe shifts, especially since COVID and you've called out some of these, like, you know, people constantly flashing luxury and this and that and like not recognizing that the room has shifted. And.

[Bethenny Frankel]

But I'm also shifting the room. There's two things. One is, yes, but also, as people are too fear based, they suck too. It's like a tone deaf thing. And now they suck because they're like changing and they, they're just terrified to move. So that sucks as much as being cautious and changing.

[Michael Bostick]

Tonally, it doesn't, it doesn't feel like you're like. Like a lot of people, like they're trying to like walk this tightrope to appease everybody. It's like you're dressing but then also shifting and saying like, hey, this is.

[Bethenny Frankel]

What I feel like the thing that happened with Chanel, it was something that happened to me, but I was happening to it. And I was able to kind of manifest that there'd be a shift in luxury while assigning it to that there's a shift in luxury. Here's what it is. I'm watching TikTok and I'm watching all these people do these unboxings. And I'm watching people get on a plane and fly to come with me to fly to Thailand to buy this bag. And like, I'm watching it. I'm like, I'm getting a little nauseated at the same time. At the same time, I'm watching all these people selling from quote unquote, the gate because you can't say dhgate from all these knockoff sites. So I'm watching that at the same time. And those look good. So I'm thinking these two things are happening at the same time. And I'm like, where is this going? And I know for myself, I'm nauseated. I can afford to buy any bag in the entire world. I've sold 50 bags. I keep saying I'm shorting this stock. I feel like it's a stock market. It's been going on for years. So if I've been feeling that way, there are a lot of other people feeling that way. And then I'm seeing like the convergence of what happened at Chanel and then I'm seeing the Walmart Birkin, which wasn't something new at all. Amazon has been selling them for years. It's just the name Walmart assigned to it. And then I'm like, this is giving people license because it's not fake. It doesn't say Hermes on it. It's got no. And I'm like, now I'm fucking entering, like now. Now what I talked about at Chanel, I'm going to connect that to here. Articles will be written about this and I will sort of be part of shifting it. I will act like it's just something that's only been going on. But I know that I'm also moving the traffic too, which I want to, because that's why I started Handbag University, because I wanted to, but it had to be authentic where I want to find things that look just as good as the multiple thousand dollar bag. So I have to prove it. And literally two billionaire women this week have reached out to me being like, I want the fucking bags. Where are these bags? What are the bags? Billionaires, billionaire women. And I'm like, this is working.

[Unknown]

Well. You posted one where I was like, oh my gosh, that is so cute. The garden bag with the green thing, right? Oh my God. I was like, I need that right now.

[Bethenny Frankel]

That was good.

[Unknown]

That was a good one.

[Bethenny Frankel]

There's another one coming up. It's Alaia inspired. The other thing is I know the knowledge of the original bag that they look like. So I can say to the people, you know, and then I'm, we're start. Well, I just. We're starting. You can enroll in Jewelry University. We're about to, we're taking. You're bridging the gap.

[Unknown]

Kind of like you're making it accessible. But the person who's buying it also feels like they're in on the luxury of it.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Well, I'm the consumer because I have, you know, 10 carat diamond necklaces and earrings so you're able to wear them. So I like this shit better. So I know like if I'm wearing it and I want it, but it's not cosplaying. I like this gorgeous ring. This looks like this is like a fortune. It's an inexpensive brand. Like I'm obsessed with this so I'm saying it and it's more interesting than anything you can get from a 47th street diamond dealer or like a dime like so I'm getting really into it myself.

[Lauren Everts]

Let's talk about Symbiotica, one of our favorite supplement companies. One of our favorite companies in general. Lauren and I have been taking Symbiotica products for years now. We've had the founders of Symbiotika on this show multiple times because everything they're doing over there is top notch. They use the highest quality ingredients and they have such a well rounded assortment of products that you can really just go to their company and basically get everything all in one place. One thing that I've been talking about for years is there's liposomal vitamin C. It comes in a thousand milligram delivery single packets that you can take to the office, you can take them to travel, you can take them to workouts. I have one every single day. What I love about liposomal vitamin C is it helps support collagen production which is essential for skin, hair, nails and joint health. And it enhances antioxidant protection which is going to help combat oxidative stress and inflammation. What I also love about Symbiote vitamin C in particular is it's a liposomal delivery which which accounts for higher absorption. Liposomal vitamin C is absorbed 80 to 90 more effectively compared to standard vitamin C products. This is going to mean less stomach irritation and longer lasting effects in the body. The reason we've been talking about Symbiotica for so long and love their products so much is Symbiotica is as clean as it gets. There's no seed oils, preservatives or artificial junk. Just high quality real ingredients that actually do something. I'm telling you guys, when you take this stuff consistently you will see and feel the difference.

[Michael Bostick]

So check it out.

[Lauren Everts]

I've focus on the vitamin C but they have so many products. Like I said, you can really shop all in one place. For all of your supplement needs. All you have to do is go to symbiotica.com TSC for 20 off +free shipping that symbiotica.com TSC For 20 off/free shipping Symbiotica Wellness Made Simple One of my personal favorite things about doing this show is that we get to discover so many things that we apply to our own lives. Selfishly, we do this show just for that reason. We also obviously love that the audience gets this information at the same time as us or a little bit after once we've done the recording. Which is why I'm so excited to share with you guys an incredible scientific breakthrough to support long term health and wellness. C15 is the first essential fatty acid to be discovered in 90 years. And get this, studies have confirmed that it's three times better, broader and safer than omega 3. So if you've been taking omega 3, this product is going to be even more effective. The origin story is Fatty15 co founder Dr. Stephanie Van Watson discovered C15 as the first essential fatty acid to be found in over 90 years while working with the US Navy to continually improve the health and welfare of aging dolphins. We've now interviewed Dr. Stephanie Van Watson twice on this show to talk about this groundbreaking discovery. I've been on fatty 15 now for the last 120 days. I take it every single morning. My inflammation levels have drastically gone down. I feel great, I'm thinking clear and I've noticed a huge benefit. So if you're still on the fence, fatty 15 has three times more cellular benefits than omega 3 or fish oil. Fatty 15 is also made from a patented pure and oxidation resistant C15 powder. Derived from plants only. It works in multiple ways. It repairs age related damage to cells, protects them from future breakdown, boosts mitochondrial energy output and activates pathways body that help regulate our sleep, mood and natural repair mechanisms that support our overall health. So check them out. Fatty 15 is on a mission to replenish your C15 levels and restore your long term health. You can get an additional 15 off their 90 day subscription starter kit by going to fatty15.com skinny and using code Skinny at checkout.

[Unknown]

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[Michael Bostick]

What drove you when you were younger? Like, what was the success you were chasing? Was it attention and visibility? Was it business success? Was it fun?

[Bethenny Frankel]

I didn't even know there was a. I didn't know business was a word. I didn't know business was a word.

[Michael Bostick]

What was the thing you were chasing?

[Bethenny Frankel]

Being somebody, making a mark. I can't say it was money. It came up later as money. It's never money for really true entrepreneurs. It's never money. It's the idea. I've always been very creative. I've always loved the idea. But I thought, like, I could be something. I want to be something. I want to, you know, jump off the page, be noticeable. And I'm sure that's a lot of, like, not getting love and attention to my house and things like that. But, like, I wanted to make a mark.

[Unknown]

When did you feel like you were somebody?

[Bethenny Frankel]

I mean, I don't know. Sometimes I feel like I'm somebody and some and sometimes I don't. But I don't know if I've ever really. I don't really believe my own bullshit. So I don't think I've ever really thought I was somebody. And it's not like the emperor has no clothes, but I know I'm respected and successful. It's more about that fame is so stupid. Not until you have it do you realize how stupid famous it's like, because it's just like, so it's like. It's like frosting with no cake.

[Unknown]

I've heard you talk about this.

[Bethenny Frankel]

You know, it's like you talk about celebrities.

[Unknown]

Explain this theory to Michael. The frosting with no cake. The celebrities that are trying to get us to just look at the frosting. And they don't want us to see the cake.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Well, just in general, I just think you need both. Like, the cake is like, why? Also, it's so crowded now. I've talked about the shift in fame. I've talked about Jennifer Lopez. I've talked about Blake Lively. So fame used to be something different, and now fame is so crowded, and there are so many different types of fame. So you can't have frosting without cake and fame now. You can't just be, like, attractive and photographed. That doesn't even work. I mean, frankly, even. Even the Kardashian, like, Kim Kardashian's a fucking boss bitch. I mean, she's a business person. Like, Kris is a business person. We can't, like, say, like, oh, they're just hair extensions or whatever. Like. No, I mean, I'm gonna talk to about Kim. I'm not gonna talk about everybody else. Courtney's got great people running her business. Good. You know, that's great. I'm saying. But Kim's a fucking boss bitch, period. The end. So she's the one I'm gonna talk about. She's not frosting without the cake. There's cake, there's layers, there's frosting. There's another cake behind it. So you could. But when she started, she was frosting without cake. When she was started, she was a bandage dress from a wealthy family that was getting photographed hanging out next to Nick Cliche and raging. Great. But she. She put the. Fucking Baked that cake fast.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Bethenny Frankel]

She put that cake. Yeah. That cake is behind that frosting as much as anybody else.

[Unknown]

How did you become so financially literate? Because that's something like, you know, a lot of people will sell their company, and then, you know, that's it. You've continued to really sort of build the Tumbleweed.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Unbelievable.

[Unknown]

Well, also, like, even with your real estate deals, how did you know how to do all of this?

[Bethenny Frankel]

I don't. It's case law. Like I said, it's case law. My. My philanthropic initiatives, which are the, you know, amazing and probably, I think, largest relief efforts in U.S. history. In many cases, private. Private relief efforts. It's like building a business. And in the beginning, no one believes in you, and you have no trust even that you're already known on television. That's again, that was frosty. I'm Bethenny Frankel. I want you to gimme your fucking money to help people. Nobody cares.

[Unknown]

Right?

[Bethenny Frankel]

Nobody cares.

[Unknown]

Right.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Had to build the case. So I'm saying, you know, you Just have to develop a language and trust in each space. And the people that last and the people that really don't get canceled even after they've done things that you may find reprehensible are people that have really layered in different areas and can withstand, you know, any storm. Like, there's. There are people that have been known for one thing, and the whole house of cards can come down. But people who, like, are really just diversifying in so many different areas, but not because they're just performing or copying anyone else, because they have a genuine interest. Like, my getting into the VC and private equity and investment space is completely an example of something that is not based in, like, oh, I just think I should have this. Like, it's based in me seeing products, asking founders, I would like to invest in and help your business. Doing that 10 times, and then recently realizing, wait, I think this is like its own business. So now we have to get into that space. It all happens organically, every single thing. TikTok was organic. Everyone was like, wait, are you doing a beauty line? Are you doing whatever? I'm like, what are you talking about? This is a garage band. But now it's not a garage band because I ended up liking it, I ended up being good at it, and it ended up becoming an amazing model. So you just do things you love, and if you notice a shift and if you notice a success in it, you double down and you layer it. You do one thing really well, you do the one Margarita really well, you fucking saturate that one thing and then you do the next thing. You do that really well, then maybe you connect the two of them together, you learn things from one to the other, and you just keep building, you just keep adding.

[Michael Bostick]

Speaking of Margarita, at the time, I mean, I think now people look at franchises and reality TV shows as opportunities to go and build businesses. But I would argue that, like, you were the first person to figure that out. We recently had Lisa Rinna and Harry Hamlin on and they talked about the Bethany clause and, like, how that exists. And that comes up a lot now. And, you know, for people that are unaware, I mean, we could talk about that. But did you know when you were going to do that television show that there was an opportunity to build a business ahead of time? Or was it something you figured out along the way?

[Bethenny Frankel]

It's the same as starting a TikTok without knowing what I was doing. No, I knew that I'm always going to be present in whatever I'm going to do. I don't do anything if I don't do it. Well, it doesn't matter if I'm making a cup of coffee or if I'm making a simple dinner. I do it or I don't. And that's how it is in life. Like I do. There was a very big A list celebrity I saw the other night at a premiere, and for the third time, he was a dick to me. But on this time, it was something that he was connected to, and I was complimenting him on the product. And he was such a dick that I was like, what do you mean? Like, stay home. Fucking stay home.

[Michael Bostick]

Why is he a dick too?

[Bethenny Frankel]

Just cause. That's just. They're allowed to be a dick. Some people are. And by the way. And I was thinking, this guy doesn't know that if I ever say who it was, it might not be good. The mimes.

[Michael Bostick]

What does it rhyme with the mimes?

[Bethenny Frankel]

I'm not going to. It's big. So anyway, so when I went, when I did the show, I had nothing going on. I had no money. I only just saw that clause as a clause that I just was like, why do I need to sign this clause? What if I do something? But I didn't think I was going to do something. I had no clue. But then when I was doing the show, I remember my boyfriend at the time was like, you just never, never interact. Only talk about your business. You're there because you want to be a chef and do it on tv. But once there, I realized I would be. That was what the product was. So I would be compromising the integrity of the actual product if I wasn't being true to the situation. This is in the beginning of Housewives, there was no Housewives. Really, like, this is me and sharing my relationship or what I think of other people. I was like, oh, okay, I guess we're doing this now. I guess we're immersing into the just being real as myself in this experience. And people bought into the margarita because of my authenticity, not because of the product.

[Michael Bostick]

No, I even remember. And listen, I'm not the target audience, but I remember watching it with her. And I remember, like, you being in the grocery stores and doing that. And I remember just thinking, like, oh, like this. Like, it resonated then that, like, oh, this is somebody that's, like, really working.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Their tail off and being honest about failing in the moment. And when I. No one showed up on my signing in Costco. That's very. Everybody would act like they're something. Everybody on reality tv Acts like there's something they're not. So I was acting like I was something that I was, which was a nobody.

[Unknown]

What was it like going into that show, as you say, a nobody, and then becoming this mogul? What was it like for the women? Because you know how, like, you. You go to high school and then, like, you graduate and maybe, like, let's say you make it big, and then you go back to the reunion and it's kind of awkward. What was that like for the women?

[Bethenny Frankel]

It was a great, interesting experiment. Experience across the board for many reasons, but again, to your point, reading the room and knowing when to come in, when to come out. So I was there for three seasons, right? And I left, and I popped off and ended and was on the COVID of Forbes magazine when I. While I left, I left from True Reason, True Reasons. I didn't want to be there. I thought it was toxic. I thought it was gross. It was three seasons in. That's very early.

[Unknown]

A lot of girls trips.

[Bethenny Frankel]

I just thought it was. I just wanted to not be there. And I wasn't, like, astronomically wealthy by any means then. And then I left. And that's when I turned to the brand. And that's. But I. Cause I had the confidence. I could see the board. I don't stay too long at a party. I don't stay. I'm not like you other girlies. I don't stay too long at a party. So I was at the party, and I thought, this feels gross, so I'm leaving. But I always trust myself. I always trust the driver and the car that I'm in. I'm gonna figure this fucking thing out. So I left, and that's when I got. I knew that I had. I knew somehow I would have a spin off. I knew I was. I knew I was connecting with this audience. I had, like, a sort of manifestation of a spinoff. But again, most spinoffs aren't as big as that original. And mine was the highest rated in Bravo history at the time. Highest rated series premiere. So the Forbes cover happens, and then the show goes from 3.2 million viewers to 1.6 million over the next three seasons. So the numbers are there. The numbers don't lie. So now I know that Andy's circling like a shark, and I know that Bravo's circling, and I want to do other shows. They want me back. And now all the girls I start to see, they're also New York women. And as much as they have egos and as much as they must hate me, for this, which they did before I was leaving. When I was leaving, I already knew I had a spinoff. And they were starting to turn and they were starting to act negative. One person in particular couldn't handle it, that I had a spinoff. They were trying to sabotage me and trying to take me down. And they tried hard and the reunion was challenging as a result. So now I leave and now the show is not doing well. So they're New York business women first and they want their. They want to protect the realm. So now they're individually all reaching out to me, begging me to come back, because it's more important to them that the product that they're on succeeds. So I come back and they accept their place in society. They accept that production has said, I won't film after a certain hour, I won't film when I have my daughter, I won't film on these days. I won't try. I had. I had a prima donna's multi million dollar contract making millions more than they were each making. And they would have. And did they know that don't ask, don't tell. I mean, they eventually knew. I never told how much, but millions more than people who had been there for six seasons were making and rules and hours. So I would go on a trip a day and a half late and leave a day and a half early and torch the joint while I was there. Make everything happen while I was there. And in fact, they would say we had to edit. Lisa Shannon would say, we edited out the stuff that when you left, the scenes weren't working and they weren't working before you came. So I would come and I would light the world on fire, come out exhausted and strip it. I'd be like, this is what I'm here to do.

[Unknown]

But what did they feel like with your business side? Like, meaning, like, are they. Some of them tried to.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Like everybody. Well, everybody copied. Even to this day, everybody copied. I mean, and everybody including Lisa and Harry, saying that, you know, it was for the business platform. Lisa and Harry. I was the one who told Andy about Lisa. I was the one who told him he didn't like Lisa, he didn't want to have her on. I was the one who told Lisa to do the Apprentice and the Housewives. Harry said, ask Bethany. He didn't want her to do it. They're not going to say that now because they're mad about the sauce. But it's okay.

[Unknown]

We'll get into the sauce.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Yeah, we can. I love. I like Harry a lot. And I Can guarantee what he makes at home is not the same. And if they were really smart entrepreneurs, they would have leaned in like this recent guy that broke Box, broke back Contessa, or this guy, Matthew Stevens. They are an example of people that live over on Instagram. They don't understand how it all works. And how it all works is Harry be like, all right, Bethany, I take your constructive. Because you can't find a sauce now online. So they sold a ton of sauce, and we know exactly how much sauce they sold because of the sort of hate buying, people were like, let me see how bad the sauce really is. And people were buying, and then they were doing their own videos. But if I'm Harry Hamlin, I would have said, okay, Bethany, I saw your sauce review. I would have stitched it and said, you're an entrepreneur and I want to take your advice. I'm challenging you to tell me what I need, what we could do. Could we even eat the sauce, taste the sauce, talk about the sauce, make sauce together. Now, listen to me. I don't want to fucking go to LA and make sauce. I really don't. And. But if I happen. If I happen to be there, but. Because I would love, like, I would.

[Michael Bostick]

If he leaned it, we can broker this and we can get this.

[Lauren Everts]

No, we broke.

[Bethenny Frankel]

It's done. The moment's done.

[Michael Bostick]

No, it's over.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Because it's my idea. No, I'll do it with someone else.

[Unknown]

It could be a skinny sauce.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Love you so much. Don't change. No. If he had been smart, instead of resisting the tie, which I knew they were, him being like, well, some people have bad taste. I'm like, okay, I think Cadillac, Uber, L'Oreal, Verizon, fucking every single brand that you could name that has a vowel in it disagrees. Harry Hamlin. So. Well, the numbers don't lie. He should have leaned in, but he couldn't help it. It's okay. I actually really like Harry and I wanted to love the sauce. I was getting the dishes out, the whole thing. But when, you know, when Lisa said, like, she was like, it was not necessary. Like, but that's not fair. Don't set like, we can't fit because there are poor people with startup businesses that send me products. I'm gonna be honest with them and be straightforward, not mean. And I wasn't mean. I was just straight up. I was trying it. I was excited to have a hairy sauce. Harry sauce dinner at my house.

[Unknown]

I have products for you. And I, I, I.

[Bethenny Frankel]

You're scared.

[Unknown]

No, I'M not.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Okay.

[Unknown]

No, I'm not.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Great.

[Unknown]

I'm actually not scared.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Scared.

[Unknown]

I mean, I'm not scared.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Okay, good.

[Unknown]

I know what I'm signing up for.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Great.

[Unknown]

Do you know what I mean?

[Bethenny Frankel]

Yeah. You have the big roller thing. I have the big roller, yeah.

[Unknown]

It feels like a dildo.

[Bethenny Frankel]

It. I've not sucked it up my vagina, so I'll let you know later.

[Unknown]

No, no, no. The grip feels like a dildo. Don't stick it up your vagina.

[Michael Bostick]

Especially cold.

[Bethenny Frankel]

But I'll let you know.

[Unknown]

It sounds like anything sell. Stick it up your vagina if you want to.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Whatever you want.

[Unknown]

Using it the wrong way when you.

[Bethenny Frankel]

What did you just say?

[Michael Bostick]

Maybe using it the wrong wrong way. The face. Yeah.

[Unknown]

Yeah. Business as skinny girl, though. And you're on that show and you're sort of separated because you're a. Now this entrepreneur, mogul, business person. What was that like? To then go back to all these women who weren't like. I feel like there's a dynamic.

[Bethenny Frankel]

It's not. It's not really. What? No, this. Okay. Two things. One, yay. I'm so glad I could, like, lay the groundworks for everybody. And that's my legacy, and not everyone knows that and doesn't even matter. Two, it's oversaturated because you can't look. And in the beginning, it was fresh and normal and you were excited, but now it's like the floater. I've got a photo shoot. I've got a charity. I've got a brand. And then the next, you know, I don't know where Beverly beach is. I don't know where she by Charay is. I don't know where Gretchen's purses are. And I love Gretchen Rossi. Shout out. Love her. I'm saying it's a. It's a testament to how difficult business is. And television should not make business look easy. So you can. And not everyone. And being on a television show doesn't mean your business is going to be successful at all. It's fool's gold. That's one little.

[Michael Bostick]

I actually think people. A lot of people get led astray thinking, oh, I'm gonna go on one of these properties. I'm gonna do what you've done. And all of a sudden, the only thing that happens is their whole life just gets torn apart by an audience, and they don't have the business. And then it's, like, even worse than when they started.

[Bethenny Frankel]

What they do go. Bless you. What they do is they go find partners and bait the fact that they're gonna be on a show and the partners are dope, so they think, okay, great. And they get involved and it's like, what happened? We showed it in the scene. And then you're fighting like it's fool's gold. You business is insane, and you have to be able to fully back it up all the time. And also, speaking about tone and pace, the audience gets turned off. You could say your product once they want it, twice, they want it third time you're done, they hate you. Like, they're, they're tuning out.

[Unknown]

It's like a celebrity that launches a podcast and just thinks it's going to be successful.

[Bethenny Frankel]

The whole. Yeah, well, that's. That's major. So what I was going to say, though, is that people will go onto Shark Tank and accept the constructive and often brutal criticism, and they're. And it's more men there. It's more male driven there. Whereas you're going to send me product and I'm going to try it. I'm going to give you a totally fair, honest review. And I'm, I've. I am a shark. I've been on Shark Tank multiple times. And you're going to then get mad at the way in which I did it. Like, no. Business is hard and you should find out in the beginning. And I, there have been people that I dislike, dislike that I have liked their products because we're talking about products. It's not who. My friend. It's not my friends.

[Michael Bostick]

Your thing is you're giving an objective with constructive or what you hope to be constructive feedback as investors do, period.

[Unknown]

Why the followers love her, period.

[Bethenny Frankel]

And I've said bad things about brands that, like, you'd want to kiss their ass because the product sucks. That's what it is. So don't send. And you know, that's it.

[Michael Bostick]

How do you think about conflict? Like, you're very brazen, obviously, and outspoken and seem to be comfortable in the fire. How do you manage personal conflict in your personal life?

[Bethenny Frankel]

Oh, I don't love to be in the fire. I don't. I like to get close to the fire. I don't like to get in. I like to be, you know, as Mark, your friend who's here. My friend, too. He says, I can I land the plane in any, in any weather. So I don't like to get into the fire. I'd like to get close. And sometimes I get a little scorched and it's not necessary. And the fucking I get, it's like a Guy who said, why he never cheats. He said, the fucking I get is never gonna be worth the fucking I get. So the fucking I get for getting into the fire is never worth the fucking.

[Michael Bostick]

Are you one of those people, like, you're very quick witted, fast spoken like, are you somebody that when you get in something you say things like, oh, shit, I shouldn't have said that. Or is it like you stand behind everything that comes out?

[Bethenny Frankel]

No, I agree. Truthfully, most of the things I've said I back, but it didn't need to be said or could have been said in a different way.

[Unknown]

Give us an example what you're talking about.

[Bethenny Frankel]

The example of what I'm talking about is Meghan Markle. The example of what I'm talking about is Meghan Markle. And sometimes you're too early for the market too. So I said cry me a river about. I think it was two days before she did the Oprah interview.

[Unknown]

Okay.

[Bethenny Frankel]

And she comes on and I, and I wasn't actually. I have, I honestly have nothing against Meghan Markle. I don't think that they've made the best business choices. So I was frustrated. Like, I would have loved to be their advisor because nobody has had more opportunity than them. Like, nobody. And I just would have liked to be in the like, no, we're going this way. You're going the wrong way. No, it's the Pisaon adventure. You're going towards the fucking top of the boat. And I get that. But the boat's upside down now.

[Unknown]

It's also appearing so perfect that's. It's hard. I think that's a big element.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Well, we could do a total. We could do a set. Yeah, we could do that. Hold on. We can go back to that. So we should park that. So I said it was just like, I was just thinking, you've been in that, you've been in that family, you've been in that house for two years. And now we're coming out and it's a little early and it's, it's just, it, it just was not landing. No one wants to hear. No one ever. No one wanted to hear Ellen DeGeneres talk about her expensive real estate or any celebrity talk about plight. So I was just like, no. Oh my God, what do you guys know? So I was like. And I felt like, cry me a river. You can't, as a person who's been in the royal palace, go down this road. So the words cry me a river got like pulled and became a whole thing. Because the next day or two days later, she's on Oprah talking about suicidal thoughts, talking about racism. So it was like I walked into a. I walked into the fire. I walked into the. I did not get close to the fire. I walked into the fire. And it could have been like, what do you guys think? I'm thinking about this situation, and I'm wondering how this is going to land. But then months later, years later, a lot of people jumped on that. On that bandwagon. A lot of people jumped on the Crimea river bandwagon. And I don't need company, but I'm. I just saw a lot of other things being done. Like, oh, my God, no, we can't launch a book and a Netflix thing and go out and get on the podiums and do the. And do the podium tour. No, no, guys, call me back. I just, you know, and. And literally, I have nothing against them. I don't know them. I actually think I would probably have a nice time with Meghan Markle. I think she's probably. I think she just. It's a beast now. It's. She would have been great in traditional celebrity land. She would have been great in traditional. Blake Lively, pre2024. Jennifer Lopez, pre 2024 traditional celebrity. It's fucking gnarly out there. It's a war zone.

[Unknown]

Well, now everyone has a microphone.

[Bethenny Frankel]

You just need to know where the landmines are. So I would have liked to be in the mix. And in fact, I know that Archewell. We knew. We knew someone in common with Archewell for Be Strong. And I was like, I want to really understand it because I'm nervous about it, because I just feel like they, like me, can be polarizing like me. So we need to know with them how it's all going to land A lot of.

[Unknown]

Not a lot, but some of your content. You've talked about celebrities doing too much at once. Like you said, it's like the hair care line and the makeup line, and then they want to talk about the movie and the this and the that.

[Bethenny Frankel]

And I literally did start that. I was the first person to monetize these products. I literally did start that.

[Unknown]

You didn't, but you've also done it brick by brick. It's a little different.

[Bethenny Frankel]

You can't put 25 pounds a bag in a five.

[Unknown]

Okay, can you talk about that? Because I think that I thought that was a great branding tip.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Okay.

[Unknown]

So I don't know if branding is the right word.

[Bethenny Frankel]

You can't put 25 pounds of shit in a five pound bag. And what happens is you are pushed out onto a red carpet by a traditional publicist trying to be current, trying to be modern in the modern day, saying, my time is a commodity. My clients have kids, they're going out, they've got glam on, they've got the major outfit, they're on that carpet. Everybody's pulling them like an octopus. Like, this is a reality show. Like, we have to get it all in because you're sleeping with so many different people and so many different partners and you got to jam it in because this is your big product. But you have to know how to read the room and you have to know how to speak this language and you just, you can't. And to your point, though, about the one thing I'll say about you saying it's all too perfect with Meghan and Harry, I. The one thing, like, I'm going to give them. We can't have it both ways. I backed up Lauren Sanchez because Lauren Sanchez has not changed once since the day I met her 15 years ago. So we can't have it both ways. She wasn't going to the Vatican. I know it's the inauguration. Okay, she was wearing a lace top, which has been now assigned as lingerie. But she was, she's the same as she was. So someone like Meghan Markle enters the royal family. You're going to dress a little differently, you're going to act a little differently. The muted tones will surface. Okay, wonderful. They live in a beautiful home in Santa Barbara. He's a prince, she was a duchess. So she's got a glossy, perfect show of her house. What is she supposed to do? Be like me and have seaweed in her teeth? Like she's fucking in Santa Barbara in a 13 million. It's okay for it to be perfect. She's. She's supposed to now cosplay flawed. That's annoying too.

[Unknown]

That's annoying to be who you actually are.

[Bethenny Frankel]

We'll meet you there. Doesn't matter. Just don't get caught in the riptide between both. We can't be smart and stupid at the same time. We can't play down, like down to earth at the same time. But you got to know your room. Like, if you're going to walk into TikTok, you got to know where the fuck you're walking in.

[Unknown]

What are you walking into on TikTok.

[Bethenny Frankel]

When TikTok was shutting. Was shutting down, I described Insta. The difference between Instagram and Tick Tock. The difference Between Instagram and TikTok is that Instagram is the lobby of a Marriott where there are some attractive people at the Christmas party. They have lanyards on. They might have name tags. They like to have fun. They might get overserved sometimes. They might say something funny. But they. And they will get excited. If a celebrity walks through the lobby, they'll freak out. TikTok is at the penthouse of that same hotel. There are tassels on the titties. They are doing inappropriate things. They are downing shots. They are also. Some of them are smart, they're outspoken. They might get in some trouble. But if a celebrity walks up there, they're gonna fucking throw them off the balcony. Unless they just happen to like them. They are just a different group. And some people complain both. I can tassel titty and I can corporate lanyard. I live in both. I have a dual residency. But you have to understand what.

[Michael Bostick]

I'm gonna pull that clip.

[Bethenny Frankel]

But you have to understand where you are and that they all. And YouTube is. They're all different. They're just different worlds. Snapchat is different too. They're all different.

[Unknown]

Michael loves a witty, strong woman. He's dying. I could tell he's holding in laughter when you're talking.

[Michael Bostick]

It's my cup of tea.

[Unknown]

Yeah, this is his cup of tea. You have recently, or you did an episode about divorce and you gave women or guys, I guess, tips on what to do before getting married. You talked about signing a prenup. What's your. If you were to counsel your daughter, say she's. She's 30.

[Bethenny Frankel]

I do. On the drive to school every day. I'm. I'm.

[Michael Bostick]

How old is she?

[Bethenny Frankel]

14.

[Unknown]

What are you telling her about setting yourself up for success within a marriage? Because you've seen it all.

[Bethenny Frankel]

I'm telling her who to model after. She has like, role models and what it's supposed to be like. And that she's seen me in a couple of relationships and so I always do takeaway about it and why it is working, why it isn't working, the things that work or that don't work. I think that people focus a lot on the resume of someone versus the nuance, versus how do you migrate? What are your patterns? Like, is someone dimming your light? You could have someone who has enough money and brains and humor and is attractive, but are they dimming your light? Are you better with them? And it's not only what you're like when you're with them. What do you like when you're not with them. How do you feel? How are they making you feel? And I feel like we really, we really as women do dumb it down and we really do settle. Women do it a lot more than I'm seeing men doing it. Women really, it's out of control and explain and make big, big grandiose statements about little things. Look what he got. Look what he did. He, Jeff walked upright today. You know, like the basic things that like we give cookies for and it's bullshit. It and I've just been, I don't want to get into detail about somebody that somebody set me up with, but I was like, are you out of your fucking mind? Like why are we supposed to get excited about this? Like it was. We're just, we're just dumbing it down. And I talk a lot on my the dating podcast is really good.

[Lauren Everts]

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[Bethenny Frankel]

I also don't know why they're not talking about emotional intelligence and relationships in Schools for kids. Like, if 60% of marriages end up in divorce, if people's biggest issues and pain, emotional pain, will be getting a divorce and financial and the stress it puts on a family, why would this not be taught in school? Like, what are we supposed to be looking for emotionally? I never knew until this age about dismissive, avoidant attachment in a relationship. Do you know what that is? No.

[Unknown]

It's time.

[Bethenny Frankel]

There are different attachment styles. It is the most brilliant thing. I am talking about it on my podcast where people have attachment styles, like, in a relationship. Some need to know where they stand at all times. They get insecure if they're not having this communication style where they're getting feeling safe and being reassured. Some people have a dismissive, avoidant attachment style where they can't handle commitment or any sort of conflict. So like, you could be trying to love this person more and they literally. It turns them off. They shut down. They can't handle it. They can't handle. And it's not a game. It's literally built within them based on how they were raised. There are just these ways that people operate.

[Michael Bostick]

And everybody has one style.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Everybody. Some people probably may just be in the middle and don't have noise in this area. Most people have one. But to be with, you know, the way that things line up where people say, oh, this sign doesn't match with this sign. This. These attachment styles don't work. Like, and that's why Mel Robbins is interesting. Because if something doesn't feel right, it is not right. Like, I just think that we gaslight ourselves way too much, making excuses for things that aren't right in the beginning.

[Unknown]

So would you tell women to sign a certain contract? Would you give them any tools to set themselves up if they are going to be getting married?

[Bethenny Frankel]

I would say you're going to have to do a prenup no matter what. And it has to be be very crystal clear. And mine was complete shit because I didn't know how far I'd go. I would say, though. But also, things should be written down a way that. How would you intend it to be with kids? You know, is it private school? Is it public school? Is it Catholic school? Is it not? Is it. If we broke up, you're Catholic, I'm Jewish. How are we handling that? Like, I think things should be worked out ahead of time. I just think that people really just don't think about the numbers. You would never enter into a business deal that had 60% chance of failing. Failing.

[Unknown]

That's like, very true.

[Bethenny Frankel]

I mean most entrepreneurs, most startups don't work. So it's actually, I'm speaking a little bit out of school. But if someone said to you about your emotional marriage, I mean relationship and something that was legally binding that it's pro 60% chance of this failing, you would get serious. But you just, you don't think about it, you get excited about the wrong things. I, I life. I have talked about this a lot. I have met, let's say I've met like 10 men. I, I have met six. Four, no, four men out of 10 in the past couple years that have full custody of multiple children because the ex wife has either gone like, has met, has become mentally ill, gone to a facility, has drug and pill issues, drinking issues and what two of them. I said what I thought it was and they both said bullseye. I said it's. Is it because your wife who is beautiful and young and wanted to get on the program, they're going to shop, they get to tell their friends they don't have to work, they're going to have the baby, you're going to work. This is the dynamic and the man continues to thrive and be successful. And you know, he's working on himself, he's working out, he still looks good and he's thriving business, he's, he's getting, you know, more, more ideas, more innovative. It's a very entrepreneurial time. And the woman, they did the costumes, they did the lunches, they did the shopping, they did the get to college. Now they don't feel that they have purpose and they continue to spiral because the only goal was pre, pre wed. The only goal because they really wanted to be able to flex in front of the other women and get the ring fast and get the dr, get everything and look perfect. And then all of a sudden their partner has thrived. And this deal is not the same way that it looked back then. The company, the overall company is not.

[Michael Bostick]

The same as it was in speaking as a man. Like at some point, how interesting does that become day in, day out for the guy? Like you want to go home and have these riveting conversations like what'd you do? It's like shopping.

[Bethenny Frankel]

And he's at, but he's at much, he's as much at fault because he too thought this would sustain them. He too liked this. We're playing house, we're ordering in dinner, we're having. We get excited about the baby, we get excited about the wedding, we have all these things to be excited now everybody's settled in their roles. He's got way more skills, way more interesting things to talk about. A bigger wealth of institutional knowledge of what goes on in life. And charity and getting out there every day. And, you know, all these men. I told her she should start a business, she should start a charity. Also condescending. Now he's petting her, he's giving her a cookie. She gets to have this little thing. You gotta. Everybody's gotta be running the same marathon in different directions in different ways. But, you know, we gotta keep moving forward. And women, this is, this is a big problem with marriage. And then men also are either cheating or they go the second time. Which is why I do have done very well in dating. Because this man doesn't want a gold digger. He wants someone he can talk to, who's smart, who can have an educated conversation about the stock market, about, you know, things that are in politics. And it's this whole disparity. And then this other woman is blood in the water. She's gotta get someone to come in and take care of her program. If she got screwed in the divorce, which happens a lot. Who's funding this next program? Who's funding chapter, the next chapter when we've got. I've got three kids.

[Unknown]

What have you seen to be successful in a marriage? Like, what are. Like now that you've gone through all this, what do you think are the successful points?

[Bethenny Frankel]

That the word is not improperly used, but really understood as a partner and in business, a partnership. And it's. It's. It's not emotionally the same, but it's effectively functionally the same. In business, a partnership is. We are both bringing something to the table. Sometimes it's similar things, but often it's different things. We are complementing each other and we both. One doesn't really work without the other. It's really a good team effort. It's really a part. It's. You're out. You're out in the wild. You're out at a cocktail party. What way are you working this room? What way are you migrating? And how are you handling a wedding? And how are you handling your vacation and your day to day and your parenting? And just like how are you both contributing to each other and to the world as what are you bringing to the table? What is this partnership? And is one person going to feel at some point like the giving tree? Like I'm the one doing all the work here? You know, it could be. It could be that the woman's doing all the work with the parenting which is a much bigger job. And, like, that's being belittled by the man. In traditional roles, in traditional provider roles, which we don't have to get into. If you married a manny, then you're a fucking idiot, because that's not gonna work. So, so, so basically, in traditional roles, what is each person bringing to the table?

[Michael Bostick]

You also said something earlier where you were talking about not dimming people's light. I think, like, sometimes people get in a relationship and it's like they. They. They kind of try to dim who their partner is and not, like, celebrate who the person is. And I think the reason that we've had success in our relationship is, like, I'm all about her being her, no matter how absurd it can be. Like, that's what I think is, like, endearing. And that's, like, what I was attracted to in the beginning.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Exactly.

[Unknown]

That's like Keith with Mark.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Exactly. That's exactly.

[Michael Bostick]

But I'll see. You know, like, I get a kick out of when especially Mark's over there. Like, when we're all at dinner and, like, they're. Mark and him are doing the. Or her are doing the thing.

[Bethenny Frankel]

He gets on a fucking roll. Yeah.

[Michael Bostick]

And it's like, I. You know, like, I've seen sometimes my male friends, they'll get with maybe somebody who's outspoken, and they start to do that, and they kind of try to, like, dumb it down. Like, that's not. That's not gonna go.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Or my.

[Unknown]

My friend got with, like, the. The party animal, and then five years later, she doesn't want him to party.

[Lauren Everts]

Yeah.

[Michael Bostick]

She's like, I don't want him.

[Unknown]

Cause he's a party animal.

[Michael Bostick]

He's like, now let me change you.

[Bethenny Frankel]

It's like, that doesn't work, by the way. That's what you're ultimately saying. But a lot of these life coaches and people can evolve and can change, but they really have to want to.

[Unknown]

Right?

[Bethenny Frankel]

So it's like, you can't change a person. You have to work on you. But you could end up leaving a person if they don't change and they devolve, you know, because meeting someone in college who's the partier, when they're 55, it's different. So you have to really, you know, think about, if you're growing together like a business, how are we shifting? How is this business shifting? What are we moving into? Are we both on board with that? I think it really is like that, and I think. I think it's. That's why I actually like this time in life to meet people, because we're still in the game. We still have action, but we still have a good sense of exactly who we are and what we want. And I think that's. And I think that women who think that it's harder now are doing themselves a disservice because it's easier, you know, so much more specifically exactly what you want. You won't waste time on what you don't want. And that's what being in your 20s is for. Being out and just fucking around doesn't matter.

[Unknown]

One of the reasons that I wanted to interview you personally is I'm so curious how you do all these different businesses, all these different things you're working on, and you're such a good mother. It's not easy. I mean, for me, like, I'm here right now in New York. My kids are in Austin. You feel. I feel bad. I feel bad I'm not there to wake up and take them to school. How do you, like, manage all that?

[Bethenny Frankel]

You have to have the day, and hopefully it's today for you that you let that go. In this sense, you be pre. You are equally a business person, an entertainer in the media industry, as much as you are a mother. And if you were me and you were dating you also. Because this is another thing that happens with a lot of men, a lot of divorced men, they have to become super dad, and they have to tell everybody, I'm a very involved dad. They want a fucking cookie for being a very involved dad. Okay, no, great, congrats. What are you putting on your fucking resume? Okay. What do you. What was the opposite? Deadbeat dad. Just be a dad. It's okay. You don't get a cookie for that. Women don't. I'm a very involved mom. The point is, I will say to someone, if someone, like, will not be a good partner to me, because they're very involved dad, I'm like. Like, I don't work that way. My daughter knows I would like to meet someone and be in a relationship and be a good partner. As much as I'm a good mother, as much as I'm a good business person. I'm. I'm not going to sit around and try to apologize for the things that I do and. And. And pretend to everybody like, I'm only a. Like, parenting comes first. Like, I'll be on the phone, my daughter will call, and, like, a man that I'm seeing will be, like. To go get that. I'm like, so. So my. My daughter's not one limb is not hanging off. She's just calling me about fucking Boba. Relax. Like, that's not how we roll. We're not desperate weirdos. Like, my daughter's gonna be a grown ass woman herself. And I'm not gonna like run home and panic because the size of a frozen yogurt was too small. It's okay. So I one day was on stage in Washington and I used to feel so guilty because I just couldn't handle it even. I was like, I wouldn't do. I was at a photo shoot. I was like taking all the food to go to eat with her. I would want to miss one minute. I like, I. I never had a nanny. I was completely manic. I would never go out at night. Also because I was in a divorce with someone who was literally saying, you're a pig animal. If I would go out one time in three months. I was in the mind control program of, you're never allowed to leave your child. I had to literally deprogram myself. But one time I was on stage and I was asked the question about the balance and I had never had an answer for it. And on that day, for some reason, I said, I am as much present here with you as I am with my daughter. So. So where you get into trouble is then you're not present with your kids. And then you're not present, but you're on stage. Cause you're worried about it if you be whole in both. And you know when you're. It's too much. You know when it's like. But you don't apologize to your kids for working. They should know you work. And so I. It took me a long time to get to the point where, even now, where I have my daughter 90% of the time, where I'm like. And I'll ask a couple of people, I'll say, so I'm with my daughter this week, five days, and I'm. I'm gonna go to LA to do this experience for two nights. Like, is that. They're like, what are you talking. Of course you're gonna do that. So, you know, you could ask and crowdsource parents who've been through and they're like, what, are you fucking crazy? Of course you're gonna do it. But by and large, you're supposed to be working and you're supposed to be parenting. And you're not supposed to feel guilty about it because it's wasted and they're not gonna remember any of this. And you're a good Parent. And you gotta just like, let that go right now.

[Unknown]

That is some of the best advice that I've ever received on this show about parenting. I've asked a lot of, of women who are busy that question. That was great advice.

[Michael Bostick]

My mother worked my whole life and I remember being a little kid and like, and she still works, you know, she's. And went. And I, and I appreciate it now a lot as I'm older, because you're right. Like, I remember her being gone, but also it was an example of someone going and working, especially being a woman. And, and it was like this thing was like, listen, this is what I do. Like, I, I do this, I provide, and then I come back and I'm with you. And it was, it's like.

[Bethenny Frankel]

But it's also what they're gonna do. It's a, it's just not, it's not, it's like, like they're not wrapped in bubble wrap. They're not supposed to have everything be perfect. And in the 50s, the, the mothers that smoked cigarettes, drank chardonnay while pregnant and opened the back door and said, this is free range parenting. See you at 8:00 for dinner. They were with their kids less than working moms are now, because that is not being with your kid. Some parents I know, some divorced parents I know, the kid is in the same house, the kids on their device the entire day anyway. Like, it's like, that's not being together. Like, I'm going with my daughter this weekend snowboarding for four days. Like, we will come back, feel nourished, I sit down and we do meal planning. And like, I love just the talking about it in the morning on the way, driving her to school on the way, which is a new thing because she used to be an hour, but not doing it on the way home. And then sometimes she's like, mom, can we go to like, you know, the supermarket and just like walk up and down the aisle, stay together after school and I'll pick her up on those days. Like, but we talk about it, we talk about it. And also they will push as far as you'll go. Like, there are days where they'll try to make you guilty and you're just like, no, that none of this is working. No, this isn't working now. Sorry.

[Unknown]

My best friend says they all need a little measured adversity.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Yeah, it just. This is life. It's not, it's not perfect.

[Unknown]

Before you go, I have to ask you another question that I feel like the whole audience wants to know how do you think about your time? I know you have like a funnel you've talked about. You did an episode that was.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Was.

[Unknown]

I was like crying laughing that you did that. You said, like, you wouldn't wake up for $10,000. Something along that explain in your context.

[Bethenny Frankel]

You could not pay me $10,000 to.

[Unknown]

To like distract me and this and the that.

[Michael Bostick]

And you were talking about a red carpet and how you have to go and they have.

[Unknown]

And you're so right. It's so much fucking work to do.

[Bethenny Frankel]

And I'm not compl. I'm just saying I give Jennifer Lopez and Kim Kardashian their flowers. Oh, I will be traumatized for four months after going. I went to L'Oreal Paris Fashion Week. I felt like I had been underneath the Pamplona Running of the bulls being trampled up. Yeah, it's not. But I'm. I'm always going. My mind's always going too. That's a lot of all the stuff that. That doesn't look like a lot of work and looks fun. All that. That stuff is work. I've gotten better at it and more adjusted and I'm well rested. I have gatekeepers and everything is gate kept. I do not do it if I don't want to do it. Like, it has to be something great to do. I just don't. I don't believe in like halfway there.

[Unknown]

What's the funnel like? How do you. When you get all these opportunities, what's your way of filter?

[Bethenny Frankel]

The filter is. The filter is a. I'm excited about it. I'm excited about it. I'm interested in it. It might not be something somebody else is interested in. Maybe it's about high end watches or something strange that everyone else would think I wouldn't be interested. I'm like, this I'm interested in because of this. Or it's like comedy. Like, I'm doing something for so much less money than I would normally do because it's for a Netflix adult comedy show. Like, that is Bullseye. Like, that's like adjacent to Saturday Night Live. Like, that's different.

[Michael Bostick]

Sidebar. You're one of the only women that I've seen talk about watches in a very educated way.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Michael loves watching watches.

[Michael Bostick]

And I watch you talk about watches and you know your watches.

[Bethenny Frankel]

I know my watches. I have a serious collection. So. So. Or it's. It's charity. I've sat like in the toilet bowl seat to go to Guatemala to do. Like, that's a different bucket. You'll Just be exhausted. You'll feel dirty, you'll feel gross, and you'll do things you would never do for like relief work. That's a different bucket. It just doesn't count. It's just like you're doing something and it's weird to be like caring about being first class to go. So that's different. And then there's just. Then there's money. There's just like, this is a lot of money. So. But even still, even for a lot of money, like, I won't do. A big, big, big brand came and they said a 12 hour photo shoot. I was like a 12. I was like, there's never, never. But usually someone thinks something's a six hour photo shoot and it's two. I'm very fast at everything I do, so just. There's nothing I want to do for 12 hours. The fact that I went to lead in a Lifetime movie in Canada where they paid me a lot more than they pay anyone for 12, like, that was like. I was like, I think I'm going insane. 12 day. I've never done anything for 12 days. I don't do anything for 12 days. So I went to. Because I was gonna check a new box.

[Unknown]

But that sleep, when you got back, did you get to sleep?

[Bethenny Frankel]

It wasn't that. It was exhausting. It was just very strange to be in a trailer and wait all day, like, and then say, oh, I'm gonna meditate and I'm gonna do yoga. I'm gonna write 20 bucks. I just felt weird in a trailer. So I might be like a little bit of like a diva actress.

[Unknown]

What beauty products do we need to be looking at right now? I have to ask you that. People will get mad at you.

[Bethenny Frankel]

I mean, it's. Well, you have to not sleep on drugstore, which is amazing. Like what I would say the big, the big deal new L'Oreal mascara is. It is a big deal because it doesn't clump, it separates and it curls. So that's a big deal. They also have a good new. A good new lip oil because it's $10 MCO is now at Target and it's like less than $10. I'm giving things that are affordable. If you're in like the rich bitch category I just talked about, like in the Borghesi mud mask, I. It's very. It's different. I think. I think I'm trying to think of what other things I'm really.

[Unknown]

Any. Any chicken salad brand.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Well, Michael's like, what chicken salad brand? The thing is, actually, you're making this idea better. I just was talking to the. I met the people from Jersey Mike's, the president of Jersey Mike's, and I think they would be. They're adding chicken salad and they have tuna salad. I know I'm going to end up going in there and redoing the chicken salad. A tuna salad. But, like, I really think that I should be formulating their chicken salad, like, to perfection. There's no fucking way they.

[Unknown]

How do you have such a taste for chicken salad?

[Bethenny Frankel]

I just love. I've never. It was like something I never said out loud that I just love tuna salad and chicken salad. I always have. I always have it. I always get it. I've always loved it. And I just didn't know that people didn't. That wasn't in their vernacular, their culinary vernacular. I did not know. So I just started talking about it, which is like. I guess it became a neat. Was a niche thing I was talking about. I didn't know. And so it just. Everyone was like, oh, my God, you've got me obsessed with chicken salad. I also did. I did start cottage ch. Cheese. It's. People could talk about it now and talk about the new brands.

[Unknown]

I had cottage cheese with pate the other day because you.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Because it started when I was on Instagram Home during the beginning of the pandemic. I was talking about cottage cheese. And fun fact. I was offered several hundred thousand dollars from a big cottage cheese brand that I turned down.

[Unknown]

Why?

[Bethenny Frankel]

Because there was a personal conflict of someone that I know that was like. Like a rival of them in the dairy industry. I can't even. This is.

[Michael Bostick]

That's how you know. You have confidence when you just claim cottage cheese. Is this.

[Bethenny Frankel]

So I'm claiming cottage cheese? Yeah. I could claim cottage cottage cheese. Yeah. I've added. I'm. I'm partially claiming everything season. I'm not claiming it. And I'm definitely partially claiming versions of. Of caviar for shizzle.

[Unknown]

Yeah. She tries all these caviars.

[Lauren Everts]

Now you.

[Michael Bostick]

But now I'm like, thinking about the lascala chicken chop salad because you said you worked.

[Bethenny Frankel]

That's different. That's chicken on a salad.

[Unknown]

Yeah. Yeah. Whoa.

[Michael Bostick]

Whoa.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Oh, my God.

[Unknown]

I'm gonna be.

[Michael Bostick]

10 minute segment.

[Bethenny Frankel]

I'm having another baby with this guy.

[Michael Bostick]

Last 10 minutes. I've been. I've been a little out.

[Bethenny Frankel]

You didn't know. You would know. You wouldn't know now.

[Unknown]

He has no attachment to food.

[Michael Bostick]

That's not true. I like food.

[Unknown]

I've Never heard him say he craves anything.

[Michael Bostick]

I like food. I just don't think. I don't ruminate about it.

[Bethenny Frankel]

You're the guy on the first date that says, I eat to live. I don't eat.

[Unknown]

Kind of like, check. That is. Yeah.

[Michael Bostick]

I don't say that. I don't say that. I like.

[Unknown]

We don't care.

[Michael Bostick]

I care, but I just.

[Bethenny Frankel]

I can't.

[Unknown]

You don't care?

[Michael Bostick]

I just don't ruminate about it.

[Bethenny Frankel]

No, we already got. You don't have to say. Say less.

[Unknown]

Yeah, because whatever you. Chicken salad at La Scala that you just thought that was.

[Michael Bostick]

Yeah, I just said I like it. And now. Okay, you know what?

[Bethenny Frankel]

It's fine. It's not even chicken salad. The Scala salad. You add chicken because I was the hostess there. It's the. It's just a chopped salad. And you can add chicken. It's not a chicken salad.

[Unknown]

Get it right. How can everyone support everything you're doing? I know they already follow you, but, like everything you're doing with your charity efforts tell us all.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Be strong. It is. Bethany.com Be strong. B t h e n n y 100% goes to the effort. There really is no one that does what we do from an efficiency standpoint, a lean standpoint, and no one stretches a dollar. No one. We've looked. We have our numbers compared to the government. Government numbers that are public, that no one can. And it's not. People only talk about how much goes to the charity. But how. How. How are you. How much goes to Hermes? Like, how much? You know what I'm saying? Like, how much? How are you spending the money? Are you an efficient business person? Are you economical? That's as important.

[Unknown]

Say someone gives you $100. Explain it in layman's.

[Bethenny Frankel]

If someone gives us $100, that's going to cash cards to individual people to rebuild their own lives, get exactly what they need, and it rebuilds their community. But we get grants and we get money from some major people that really look at the P and L and exactly how. How are you spending those grants? Like how. Where is that money exactly going? And how. What? Like, in other words, how much are you spending on? Not me, because. Be strong. 100% goes to the effort. But my 501C3 partner. What's being spent on this warehouse? What's. What's going through trucking and shipping and things like that. It's the way that we spend money.

[Unknown]

It's disruptive, actually, is what it is. In this industry, people don't realize how much shit doesn't go actually to what you're.

[Bethenny Frankel]

No, it's thinking.

[Unknown]

It goes.

[Bethenny Frankel]

It's very corrupt. There are a lot of people that go in there and reclaim aid and money gets wasted and it's a very corrupt place. And celebrities that will happen soon, that. That will be another resistance revolution where people will realize not to just trust a celebrity link because they don't know what the link means.

[Unknown]

So kind of like a me too reckoning situation.

[Bethenny Frankel]

It's not that they're. They just. They're just regurgitating.

[Michael Bostick]

They think they're doing well, but it's not.

[Bethenny Frankel]

They don't know what it means. You can't promote. Why you can't promote anything if you don't know exactly what it is. Now, listen, I don't know exactly how every lip gloss I talk about is made. I definitely don't. I don't even know if they're clean and green. I don't. That's for someone else to do. But if you're telling people in an absolute horrific crisis where to donate, you better have a decent understanding of how much is going. Where it's going. Was it on Charity Navigator? And you should just have an understanding of it because I have a bunch of examples of celebrities that have had to give back money because they raised it and they had nowhere to put it, no way to distribute it.

[Unknown]

Bethany Frankel, I could have asked you 600 other questions. Come back anytime.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Thank you. Thank you.

[Michael Bostick]

I'm glad we made it through the filter.

[Unknown]

I told you off air. I love your rants.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Thank you.

[Unknown]

The rants are amazing.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Thank you.