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The Bossticks
Chris Appleton On Finding Your True Identity, Resilience, & Breaking His Silence To Live Authentically
01:15:47
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- [00:00]
Lauren Everts
The following podcast is a Dear Media Production. She's a lifestyle blogger extraordinaire.
- [00:08]
Chris Appleton
Fantastic.
- [00:09]
Lauren Everts
And he's a serial entrepreneur, a very smart cookie. And now Lauren Everts and Michael Bostic are bringing you along for the ride.
- [00:16]
Michael Bostic
Get ready for some major realness.
- [00:18]
Lauren Everts
Welcome to the Skinny Confidential. Him and her.
- [00:25]
Michael Bostic
Chris Appleton is back. You guys all fell in love with him the first time he was on the show. He is back in action and this episode has some range. He is a TV personality, world renowned celebrity hairstylist, a dad, and he is also a New York Times best selling author. In this episode, Chris shares his childhood struggles. He talks about his experience with coming out, mental challenges that he's faced, how he's gotten through those mental challenges, therapy, self acceptance. He even goes into some fun tips and tricks from the clients that he works on which consist of JLo, Martha Stewart, Kim Kardashian and Kris Kardashian. With that, let's welcome Kris Appleton back to the show.
- [01:14]
Lauren Everts
This is the Skinny Confidential, him and her.
- [01:18]
Carson
You're on a book tour and then you squeezed in JLo.
- [01:21]
Chris Appleton
Yeah, I mean, I think it's really nice to have those moments. It was fun to create like a nice moment. Obviously, the Golden Globes is a special one. It's funny, I still get so nervous.
- [01:30]
Lauren Everts
Really?
- [01:30]
Chris Appleton
Yeah. I was working out my trainer and I said, I'm a little anxious. And he's like, why? I says, well, got the Golden Globes with JLo. And he said, the fuck you nervous for? He's like, you're like the king of hair, right? He's like, you good? He's like some straight dude isn't, you know, he's like. I was like, I don't know, I always, I still get nervous before every big thing because I care, I guess. You know, because I care. I want it to be good. And also there's a certain amount of expectation of like a look, you know, whatever it's going to be. And I think when you're working with someone like Jlo, you know, she, she has a real presence and she brings that. And like a lot of people like to look at the glam and see what they're gonna look like. And you know that, you know, the Internet is a dark place and people always wanna see it fall or fail. You know, see they're waiting for that one hair to be out of place or something to go wrong. But no, I mean, I remember when she left, I said to the makeup artist, Scott, I was like, you know, it's great when someone Feels really good. I could tell she felt really good when she left. And it's like a really, like, infectious feeling, you know, that you feel good and go and face the world.
- [02:27]
Carson
I guess one thing that I noticed in your book is it's not about doing just hair.
- [02:34]
Michael Bostic
It's about.
- [02:35]
Chris Appleton
Did you read it?
- [02:35]
Carson
Yes, I read the whole thing. Yes. I loved it.
- [02:39]
Chris Appleton
Oh, look at those nose.
- [02:41]
Carson
Yeah, it was really good.
- [02:42]
Lauren Everts
You got the research on you.
- [02:43]
Carson
But what I noticed in the book is it's not just about doing hair, but it's how you make people feel seen.
- [02:48]
Chris Appleton
Yeah, totally. Yeah.
- [02:50]
Carson
When you say you're nervous, are you nervous about working with her? Are you nervous about making sure she feels fully seen? Or are you nervous about the reaction.
- [02:58]
Michael Bostic
Or is it a medley?
- [03:00]
Chris Appleton
I think it's just more the world we live in now, the Internet, there is so much pressure. And every time you put something out there so publicly, you have to know there's gonna be a conversation.
- [03:11]
Michael Bostic
Yeah.
- [03:12]
Chris Appleton
So it's just more, I guess, related to. I guess it's more related to the work. Cause I know we have a great relationship and, you know, I think it's more related to the work and making sure. I know I'm still that kid at like nine years that just wanted to make people look and feel good. And like, you know, my idea of what looks and feels good is different to maybe what someone else's is. And there's just always going to be a conversation, but I think it's kind of good. I hope I always feel that way. In fact, I think the day I don't feel that way is maybe the day it's over.
- [03:38]
Lauren Everts
You know, I think it was Mel Robbins.
- [03:39]
Chris Appleton
Wait, you guys never get nervous? You ever get a little.
- [03:42]
Lauren Everts
I was going to say I get nervous all the time, but Mel. I think Mel Robbins. I think it was Mel Robbins. She was on the show. She said so many great things, but she was saying that if you're someone that gets nervous or anxious before speaking or before doing hair before in a show or whatever it is, it's. It's just an indicator that.
- [03:57]
Chris Appleton
Absolutely 100% right.
- [03:58]
Lauren Everts
And like, if you don't ever get nervous, you don't feel that way. It's also maybe an indicator, like, maybe you don't care anymore. Maybe it's good to look at different things.
- [04:05]
Chris Appleton
So maybe you've outgrown it. Maybe it's time to move on.
- [04:07]
Carson
When do you remember the first moment? And I know this, a lot of this is in the book, but when do you Remember the first moment of making someone feel confident about their hair and seeing how they felt.
- [04:18]
Chris Appleton
My mom, yeah, when I was, like, a kid, 9, she had a really rough upbringing. Like, her mom and dad got murdered when she was 10. She never got told where they were buried. She had to go and live in an orph. It was bad. You know, she had a pretty rough upbringing, and she had five kids. She was a working mom. Life was far from glamorous. So when I used to do her hair, try and make her look like what I saw on tv, like Hollywood people, you know, my version of. At nine years old, and when she stood up and looked in the mirror, it was like a reaction. And I found that really powerful. And so I think that was the first time I was like, wow, this is like a superpower. And I felt I wasn't great at scores, dyslexic. So that wasn't really understood. So I just kind of felt like I was stupid. I was pretty much told I was stupid. I think I was like, all right, well, this something I'm good at. I'll be the best at it. And then it started. At a really young age, I just was like, I'm going to be the best at this. I want to learn everything there is to know about hair. And that was when my journey began. It was young, pretty young.
- [05:11]
Carson
What was that like being told you're stupid when you're young?
- [05:14]
Michael Bostic
Are you told by that, your teachers.
- [05:16]
Carson
Or by your family?
- [05:18]
Chris Appleton
I mean, every. I think everyone just. I mean, I was put in the special needs class, so it was like. It wasn't a great title to carry, you know, And I think I wrote the book your Roots Don't Define youe, because quite often they do. That message defined me, and it worked great for my profession because it motivated me so much emotionally. And in my personal life, not so much, you know, but I had to figure out that later on in life. So quite often, I notice that the roots really do define all of us, and we carry these ideas for our whole lives from someone that, you know, probably meant nothing in our lives, but they once said something to us, and we carry it. I think the bigger thing probably was, like, when I got a job at the age of 13, so I'd been, you know, just playing around for a few years, and my mom was like, why don't you get a job in a salon? I was like, yeah, maybe I'll get a job. But then when I did that, a lot of the kids at school were like, you're gay. You know, you do hair and you're a guy, so you're gay. And it was. Honestly, before I'd even got to a place of discovering sexuality. You know, I didn't really have the chance to explore that. But it was definitely not a great thing they were saying. And being bullied as a kid is horrible. Like, you don't want to be different. You just want to blend in. And I think. I mean, it was bad. I mean, they, like, beat you. I got beaten up, spat on, you know, punched in the face, walking through the corridors for no reason, just because I did hair and because they thought I was gay. So I very quickly got programmed to being like, I'm not stupid and I'm not gay, and I'm going to prove everyone wrong. And I didn't even realize I did that. But I definitely abandoned myself from a really young age, and I think a lot of people do. I abandoned myself to be a version of myself that I could be and explore and do things like you should do as a teenager and make mistakes and try things out. And I just got headstrong on proving everyone wrong. But then that caught up with me later on in life.
- [07:06]
Carson
And when. When you got married, had you had any gay experience before that, or did you go right into your marriage?
- [07:13]
Chris Appleton
So we. We never got married. Me and Kate were together for nine years, but we were never married. No. I remember going to a gay bar as a teenager, but I always had a girlfriend. I went with my girlfriend. We went. It was just a night out. I remember just kind of looking around, and some guy at the bar turned around to me and he's like, you don't belong here. And that really stayed with me because I remember thinking, oh, yeah, you're right. Like, I. I don't. Like, you know, like, this is not for me. You know, I shouldn't be here because there wasn't really much. I don't know, back then. It was kind of like the idea of being gay is they all went to these gay men, went to a certain pub, gay men and women. And it was on at the outskirts of the city. Men got hiv. That was what we were told. That was kind of what they knew. They didn't really. I mean, Princess Diana shook people's hands without a glove. It was like worldwide news, because people thought you could catch it from touching people. You know, obviously we know so much more now, but there was a lot of fear around all those things. And like I said, I just kind of carried that. Not consciously, but I was headstrong. On knowing that I was not different. I was normal. I, you know, met Kate, fell in love with her. We had a beautiful relationship. And then at the age of 26, 27, it kind of broke down. We were still very close. And still now to this day, we're like best friends. We speak every day. But during that time, you know, when you go for a breakup, you try new things. And I was traveling a lot. Most people, I mean, if you relate it to, like, a haircut, we call it, like, the breakup haircut. It's always, like, the red flag of haircuts. People come in and, like, just cut it all off. You know, they have hair like yours. They've had it all their life. You break up and, like, I just want to be something completely. Because people usually want to cut away the pain, and they want to see a different version of themselves. We talk about that in the book. But, you know where I was at? I was having. I was sort of dating people, and one night, some guy tried to kiss me. We were out. I was in Barcelona. We'd had a lot of drinks, and I didn't think much to it, but I remember going back to my hotel room and really brushing my teeth and brushing my tongue. I was thinking, like, oh, I hope you can't get hiv. You know, Again, I was told as a kid you could get hiv.
- [09:04]
Lauren Everts
Well, even. Even then, yeah.
- [09:06]
Chris Appleton
I was just, like, really freaked out. Cause it was installed on me as a kid.
- [09:08]
Carson
And your mother said that to you as well, right? That was her narrative.
- [09:12]
Chris Appleton
She actually doesn't remember it. Like, I've spoke to her, like, later on in life. She doesn't remember it, but that's. I was just afraid, you know, she just didn't know. Like, it was just like, that's what we knew about being gay then. It was like, that was a. A big thing. There wasn't that we didn't have to prep and stuff like that, you know? So I became friends with this person, and that was my first step into changing sexuality and. And being gay and even thinking about what that meant. And initially, it didn't feel at all weird because we were just friends. And he didn't even live in the same country, so it was just a conversation on the phone. But it was the first time I could relate to someone. And then I kind of, like, clocked. I started to feel something. So I. Very quickly. Actually, I'll tell you a deeper secret. It's not even a secret I wrote about in the book, but it's still new to Say out loud. As I got to know him and as we became friends after a few months, I remember him saying to me on the phone, I need to tell you something. And I. Really weird. I knew what he was going to say.
- [10:09]
Carson
You knew?
- [10:10]
Chris Appleton
Yeah, I just knew it. I don't know why I felt it. And he said, I'm HIV positive. And I was like, oh, my God. That's actually. So that is what happens when you're gay. You do get hiv. And that's the point. It's like a punishment, you know? And it felt like. So even if I ever tried to look, I was like, oh, no, no, I'm good, I'm good. And it really freaked me out. And I kind of thought, I can control this. It's fine. Like, I've never had it my whole life. And a lot of people said to me when I came out, like, you must have always known. And I honestly didn't. Like, I loved Kate. We had a great relationship. We had great sex. I wasn't thinking of guys when we had sex. I wasn't watching gay porn. I wasn't meeting guys on the side. The truth of it is, is I made a career out of making people look in the mirror and, like, really see themselves. So as a career, it's been great. I just never allowed myself to stop and look in the mirror because from that young age, I was very fixated on proving everyone wrong, doing what society said was normal and brain is a powerful thing and, like, fear and I don't know, I guess being bullied. It was relentless. I. I was really fixated on.
- [11:11]
Lauren Everts
You built a structure for yourself in a framework.
- [11:14]
Chris Appleton
Yeah, I didn't even. Didn't allow myself to look left or right.
- [11:16]
Lauren Everts
I think a lot of people do that in. In all sorts of areas of life. Right. Whether it's like, I'm the. I'm the A student, or I'm gonna be the doctor, or I'm gonna, you know, be this. Or I think people create the. I think gay, straight, whatever. Like, I think people create those frameworks all the time. And it's. As I've gotten older in life. We were joking earlier. As I, you know, approach my 40s, start to get grace here. Like, it's been kind of the first few years where I've started to, like, really look back at myself as a child.
- [11:45]
Chris Appleton
Yeah.
- [11:45]
Lauren Everts
I start to think, like, oh, like, why am. Like, why am I programmed to certain do this? Yeah, because I think you just kind of, like, you get to a place. I think this happens. Maybe mid-30s or later. But you're like, why am I programmed this way? Why do I think this way? Why do I behave? Like, why are you anxious about certain things? Why are you fearful about certain things? And likely, if you look back to your childhood, it'll inform a lot of that.
- [12:05]
Chris Appleton
You can trace it back. Yeah. And it all comes from. It can just be one conversation, one comment someone made to you. Like, parents do it all the time. They say to kids, you're the quiet one, you know, your sister's the outgoing one, you know, or you suit bangs, your forehead's big. Like, people carry that them whole lives. And I first realized it when doing hair. So I'd sit women down, I'd be like, okay, so tell me about, like, who you are, what you do, where you want to go. And then I'd say, well, what are your aspirations? And maybe use, for example, like, I've always loved, like, blonde hair, but I know I can't do that. And I'd be like, okay, so what makes you say you can't do that? And, well, I just know I can't. And I'd say, well, who told you that? Like, where did that. Where's that come from? And, you know, they'd have to take a minute and, like, you know, think about where that came from. And it probably be like, once as a kid, someone was like, blonde doesn't suit you. And they carried that them whole lives. So I realized people put a block on their outer appearance for sure. And that was something I kind of broke down. And I noticed I did that in the chair. When people sit in a stylist chair, I think it's a vulnerable place to be. And I'd open that up in number. Then I realized it went so much deeper. And that's what the book is about, is the outside appearance is great. If you get alignment on the outside, beautiful. But there's been plenty of times in my life I've been aligned on the outside. Looked like I had it all together. I've been completely broken on the inside. And the real beauty is getting aligned on the inside. And I really encourage people in the book to really take a long, hard look in the mirror and actually stop. Because we glance at ourselves maybe 10 or 15 times a day in the mirror. You're brushing your teeth, maybe you're combing your hair.
- [13:34]
Carson
Michaels might be 30. Michael's, like, 55.
- [13:37]
Lauren Everts
I never met a mirror I didn't like. I gotta be honest.
- [13:39]
Chris Appleton
But, you know, like, checking our teeth. I don't know what we what are we doing? Right? We just looking in the mirror, we're glancing ourselves. We just know what we look like. Right. But not many people really stop, look in the mirror and see if the image on the outside is really aligned with how they feel on the inside. So the book is for anyone that's ever considered, like, is this it? Is this my life? Is this. Is this is where I've got to. You know, because so much of what we've created is not really truly our own journey. It's been what we've told to be. You're told to be a doctor as a kid, you're told to be do this as a profession, or this is how you spend money. And we inherit these. These things that we told as a kid. And you do have the possibility and the power to change that. And, you know, if you're honestly comfortable and happy in life, then great. But if you've ever asked, is this enough? Why do I do this? Then the book breaks it down into starting from the beginning and working out what your true journey is. And it's really empowering.
- [14:32]
Carson
I think that this is important coming from you too, because, like, yeah, you make the most beautiful women in the world look more beautiful on a daily basis. And what you're saying is, yes, you do this for a living, but there's more to it than just just the way you look.
- [14:47]
Chris Appleton
100.
- [14:48]
Lauren Everts
Yeah.
- [14:48]
Chris Appleton
And. And universally, it worked with everyone. Like, by the way, I've not. People know me now from working with celebrities, but I've worked with just regular men and women in the salon. I've worked with supermodels on a Runway, and I've worked with cancer patients that lost their hair. Like, there is something about identity that goes so much deeper and it's connected so much deeper. And I think why I wrote the book also is because people probably have an idea of me. Chris Appleton works with celebrities, looks, you know, post topless pictures, I don't know. But it's all. And it's all really, I guess, to an extent, it's a lie. And originally I had a book written which wasn't this. And it was more reflective of that kind of idea of what people knew about Chris Alperton, maybe what was expected. It was more kind of glossy, more glam. And I thought, you know, that's really not where I'm at in my life. It's really not what I've learned and how I feel. And in the book, I really wanted to scratch away this glossy, glamorous surface and show people my darkest times, my darkest moments, the lowest times in my life, because I hope that will enable someone else to do the same and make them feel not so ashamed or fearful or lost in saying, you know, I actually have had dark times in my life. And instead of running away from them, making them part of your journey. Cause that's what happened to me. So, in actual fact, I rewrote it. And then I talked about the darkest night in my life, which was trying to end it. And that was hard. It wasn't an easy thing to do, but I was like, how am I going to. I think I had to. I really wanted to approach it organically and honest. I wanted it to be a very honest reflection of where I'm at.
- [16:20]
Carson
Why did you decide specifically to open up about that? That sounds like it was a really conscious decision.
- [16:26]
Chris Appleton
Yeah, it was always my biggest, darkest secret. I swore no one would ever know about it. There's so much shame around it. I never wanted the kids to know. I never wanted anyone to know I was weak or broken or rock bottom. I mean, to try and take your own life, it's a very dark place to be. And that's where I got. I got there, though, for. From a journey of 20 years, not living authentically, not looking in the mirror, not allowing myself to be seen doing and being who I was told to be, what was right and what was normal. But that caught up with me, and then it was just too. I couldn't. I couldn't take that information in. And the worst night and why I tried to do it was telling my kids. Because as a dad, all you want to do is protect your kids. You know, if someone does something to. On playground, you want to find out more, fucker. And, you know, there's been plenty of times we've been at like, you know, one of those parks at the. At the pub, and some kid does, and I'm like, which one is it? You know, it's like a sly little. Anyway, I'm talking about that. But to be the one that's hurting your kids, to be the one that you feel like you're inflicting pain, you're inflicting anything that I experienced at school or growing up. And by the way, it wasn't just at school. It was my brothers. Like, they used to be really me, you know, it was. I came from a certain amount of. Well, there's a lot of toxic stuff that went on, and I just thought that was normal. So telling my kids, I just felt like they were gonna Be different. They're gonna have a gay dad. They're gonna get bullied. And I thought it'd be better for them to have a dad that was dead, honestly, than gay. Cause it just.
- [18:01]
Lauren Everts
How old were you kids at the time?
- [18:03]
Chris Appleton
It was 6 and 8 when they were young. Yeah. So, yeah, that was the darkest moment of my life. I mean, it's not. It's not something I'm proud of, but it's. I was trying to kill a version of myself that was happening, and I couldn't control it. I felt like cancer. I write about this in the book. I say it felt like a cancer. If I could cut it out of me, I would have. I used to go to bed every night with a picture of the kids, and I'd just lay there and pray to God that this would be taken away from me and I wouldn't have to deal with it. I just wanted to go back to being a dad, you know, being straight, just being a regular guy. After I woke up, I was in the hospital. Kate found me, actually. She traced my call. She saved my life. Kate saved my life. I remember laying there and I just was like, so I didn't die. And I remember thinking, well, I don't think I could hate myself any more than I did and feel any more shame or try and get away from myself anymore. Like I say, it was like a physical feeling. If I could cut it out, I would have. And I was like, well, what about if I just stop? I just accept it? And it wasn't loud. It was really quiet, but I was just with myself. And I could hear voices around me. But I remember just thinking, well, what about if I just accept it and I just start there? And I don't know what's next, but I'm going to start right here. This is obviously who I am. And. And that was kind of the beginning of, I guess, living authentically. I didn't know the next step, but that was the beginning of my journey. And I wanted to share that because it was so pivotal in my life. And I think obviously mine was around sexuality. But a lot of people are in unhappy marriages, relationships, friendships, jobs, or just even their appearance. Like, if it comes down to something as small as that, there's so many people that are not aligned with, like, truly who they are. So for anyone that's ever, like I say, just wondered, like, is this it? Like, then there's usually something more, because if something feels wrong, it usually is.
- [19:54]
Lauren Everts
You know, I think it's important for people like yourself to Come on platforms like this and share these stories. Like, we've done this show for a really long time now and we've talked to so many people.
- [20:04]
Chris Appleton
Yeah.
- [20:04]
Lauren Everts
All sorts of different profiles. Right. Like a list down to, you know, people that may be more obscure that you're not. That's not as well known.
- [20:10]
Chris Appleton
Okay.
- [20:11]
Lauren Everts
But, like, the common denominator through everything is that the end of the day, people are just people. Some have bigger platforms and more notoriety, but everyone's kind of going through life maybe not with the same struggle, but most of the people that we have on that you think have it the most figured out. Like, the reason they've got to a certain place is because of something like this that they've been able to overcome. I think sometimes, like. And we did this for sure. Before, you know, before you get introduced to some of these people, you start to think like, somebody has something special, like.
- [20:39]
Michael Bostic
Yeah.
- [20:39]
Lauren Everts
Some celebrity or some, you know, a Chris Appleton. Like, they're. Oh, they're different than me. They breathe rare air. And it's like you might have different elements that you figured out in terms of how to handle life. But, like, we all start kind of the same way. Like this multiple way that has to go through life. And it's not like, at the end of the day, like, everyone is struggling through life.
- [20:58]
Chris Appleton
Yeah.
- [20:59]
Lauren Everts
And I think sometimes we think like, oh, that's for them. They're different than me. No, no, no. They've just maybe figured out a few things to. In order to break through whatever they needed to break through. But you talk to people and people are just people.
- [21:09]
Chris Appleton
Yeah. And I think even like just going off that, like, I write a whole chapter in the book about envy. Like a big part of my job, big part of my life, a big part of being in Hollywood. What I've seen is envy. Like, a lot of people being env. So easy to be envious. Like, you go on social media, like, why have I not got that partner? Why is my hair not like this? Why do I not. Why is my body not better? I don't know. It's so easy to compare yourself. And I write about the book about comparison is it's actually a really sad place to be. And I think it leads to a lot of toxic behavior. And I see that on social media all the time. They have really mean comments. Saw a comment the other day, someone wishing someone that Wishing to someone, they had cancer. And I remember thinking, God, that person must be so unhappy. I've always been the type of person where I've Tried to flip it. I mean, obviously I've had the opportunity to work of amazing people like Kim jlo, lots of amazing women that have built, you know, empires. I've always just tried to be like a sponge and absorb it, like take that information and learn and instead of looking at them as a green eyed monster, actually like changing it into being something like, all right, there's obviously something about their life, whatever it is that I really like, I'm attracted to. How did they get to that point? Like, what was their journey? And I will use them as a mentor and a role model to work towards. And like, it sounds really simple, but little things like that, changing it from being envious into actually something where you're like, okay, let me, let me work towards what they've got, you know, rather than just sitting there and rotting.
- [22:30]
Lauren Everts
What people do online, in my experience is not just the comparison, but what, where the shortcoming is, is like you kind of, you want to cherry pick elements of the person's life. Like it would be great to be rich and famous on the parameters that I've set. But if you said to someone, hey.
- [22:46]
Carson
What do you mean?
- [22:47]
Lauren Everts
I'll give you an example. If you said to someone, hey, you will never be able to go to a restaurant again without people bombarding you, taking pictures of you. Your children will never be able to go out in public again without security.
- [23:00]
Chris Appleton
Yeah.
- [23:01]
Lauren Everts
You will not be able to take, you could public transportation, but if you do, you're going to be demolished. Everything you say and do will be scrutinized by the rest of the world.
- [23:11]
Chris Appleton
Yeah.
- [23:11]
Lauren Everts
If you make one statement that turns to be wrong, you will be put on national news like, like people like the idea of what fame and celebrity and maybe money comes with, but you have to also be willing to take it. I mean, listen, we've done this again a long time. We know a lot of people that have reached that level. Like I look at, I talk about on the show, I go, listen, there's a certain point where, you know, you really got to like decide, is that what you want?
- [23:38]
Chris Appleton
Right?
- [23:38]
Lauren Everts
Like, you see those, you can't turn that switch down. Like we're picking on like a JLO or Kardashian. Like they cannot live normal lives. And I think for people that get closers, and you've probably seen this firsthand, and this is not a commentary on either of them, but a lot of that can be much more isolating than people realize if you haven't actually experienced it because you don't know if people Are around you for the right reasons? Do they want you? Do they actually like you? Are they trying to get something? It just. It's a. It's a. There's a lot that comes with that. And so I think comparing to that, if you're not willing to actually trade everything about your life for that and really look at all the things that come with it, I think. I think it's just not a good exercise.
- [24:13]
Chris Appleton
Well, it's like looking at someone that's fit as fuck as a six pack and you're like, bitch. And you're sitting there in a donut. You know what I mean? It's like, come on, at some point you gotta like, put it down and go, all right, this is my last one. I'm gonna. You don't necessarily have to get to that point, but maybe there's things you like about them being a bit more fit and maybe it's time to do something about it. And it usually comes from a place of, like, change. Change is uncomfortable. Not many people want to do that. I've made so much change in my life. I'm always changing still to this day. And I think maybe people knowing that is something you have to do and that's what's involved, and taking them through the process of that, making it not feel so heavy, sharing stories that make them laugh, some behind the scenes stories of working with celebrities. I don't know, I just wanted to put something together that just helped people but in a different way. It really isn't just about getting a new haircut. It's so much deeper than that.
- [25:02]
Carson
When you made the conscious decision to.
- [25:04]
Michael Bostic
Accept who you were, how.
- [25:07]
Carson
What happened after that? Was there some. Was there something that opened up after you made that decision?
- [25:13]
Chris Appleton
Yeah, I mean, I think it was brutal in terms of just accepting it. I couldn't even say the words I was gay. I found that very difficult to say. So first of all, it was being able to just say those words, you know? And I think what was really difficult is as I was trying to change, everyone else around still remembered the version of me that I was. So it was always like this conversation. I'll be really honest, I ran away. It coincides with my career changing massively. So I built a relatively good name for myself. I'd won a few competitions. I'd also lost. I've lost so much more than I've won. So people think like, oh, you got this and then you got that. Like, no, I've been plenty of time down and out year after year. But I kept going. So I used every accolade as the next step. I started working with Rita Ora. She was a celebrity in the uk, pretty big. We've changed in her hair up. One day I get an email from JLo's team. I'm on set in the UK and it's an email from JLo's team that says, JLO would love to do you to do a hair for a Vegas show. So, of course I deleted the email because why would that be real, right? You know, it's like, you've won a million dollars. Just ring this number and it's fucking $20 million an hour, you know, I was just like, oh, that's obviously not real. So then I got another email a couple of weeks later and I was like, wow, maybe I could do this. Maybe I could actually do her hair. She obviously seen my work on social media. Maybe I could go to the uk, US I, I tell that story as my work story, and it definitely was a huge motivation. One of the most freeing things about coming to America was I could just say, hey, my name's Chris. And, you know, I could be gay and not be like, oh, that's Chris. He's gay. But he was straight and he had two kids and then he left his wife. But he always knew about, we think, you know, it was always this conversation I felt like I couldn't escape. So there was a freedom for me being able to start again, almost like I would have as a teenager, if you like, but without all of these conversations going on around me, which I just found so confusing, and I found it very difficult and I just had so much shame. I carried shame really heavily. So I think that for me was the beginning of my journey of sort of self discovery. But then, you know, I went into plenty of relationships as I did with my job, trying to make people look and feel their best. You know, I was very much about giving love and trying to, I guess, not really giving the love that I needed myself to myself. I still hadn't got to that point yet. So, yes, I could say, I'm Chris, I'm gay, I could live that life and, and thought I'd be okay, but there was so much more to, like, truly, like, loving yourself, being able to look in the mirror and be like, I'm, I'm proud of where I'm at and I am aligned, and I probably look like I had it together from the outside because I made a career out of it. But on the inside, like I say, it didn't. It didn't match.
- [27:51]
Michael Bostic
When I had my firstborn, I was feeling off after I had her. And so I went to a bunch of different doctors and I told them that I was feeling really tired and lethargic and they sort of all were like, well, it's postpartum. And I knew something was off. Like I could feel something was off, but I didn't know what it was. I brought it up to my annual doctor and I just felt like they were not concerned because they thought I was just dealing with postpartum issues. Well, it turned out that I had postpartum depression and anxiety and it wasn't just postpartum. And I wish I could go back and talk to myself in that moment because I feel like I wasn't being taken seriously. So that was very annoying. This is why I'm so excited to partner with hers. They're a positive force and they're really out to provide access to care that women deserve. What they do is they address key tension points of an outdated healthcare system. So if I had had this when I was dealing with postpartum depression and anxiety, I would have been able to get a clear picture of my health. And now you can get a clear picture of your health with convenient access and an in depth holistic lab testing. So it's really cool. If prescribed, you get access to not a one size fits all treatment plan. So it goes beyond that, it's beyond medicine. You get lifestyle tips for better outcomes, it's convenient, it's 100% online, which is so seamless. And they also have ongoing support for weight loss. So if you're struggling with that, they're really amazing. And they also have support for heart health and menopause and more. As a HERS partner, this is exciting for me to share because if you go to the doctor and you keep getting the same result that they're not taking you seriously. This is a platform that you can go on and you can start simple. So what they do is they do a simple online consultation with the provider to see if you're eligible. So they really care about your whole process. The best thing about this though, to me is it saves you time because I wasted so much time driving, parking, getting out of my car, walking in, I would run into someone like, you're signing in for the appointment. Then you get to the doctor and they only tell you like, there shouldn't be anything wrong, you're just postpartum. And with this they use the approach of it's not a one size fits all, like there's different treatment plans and it does go beyond medicine. And you do need to have different lifestyle tips for your best outcome. So if you're looking for supports with weight loss, heart health, menopause, postpartum, you definitely have to check them out again. It saves you time and you really get that clear picture of your health which we all want. You can check out for hers.com to learn more. That is for hers.com to learn more. So I do this thing now. I have protein before coffee, okay? So I'll either have like two hard boiled eggs or some cottage cheese with some mango or kiwi or I will have protein powder and the protein powder I tend to do when I'm in a hurry. And as a mom of three, I am running out the door a lot. So what I do is I do two scoops, you guys of Paleo Valley bone broth protein. I am obsessed with with the chocolate. That's my favorite. I like it so much that I have rebranded it as chocolate water to my kids. So they'll each do a scoop. The trick is to froth it in water. I give it to my kids. We both have our protein. I get 40 grams, they get 20. It's a win win. The reason I like their protein too is it's made with real ingredients. There's quality sourcing, there's no junk, there's no fillers. It's also great grass fed. They really like thought of everything so I don't have to think of it. Do you know what I mean? Like, I don't want to have a protein that I'm eating every single day and giving my kids that's filled with a bunch of artificial fillers and sweeteners. I just want to keep it simple and that's why I like this protein. Paleo Valley is known for its bone broth protein. You guys probably heard it can't go wrong with the chocolate. They also have vanilla. But just like don't sleep on the chocolate. I sometimes will aggressively order it as quick as I can to like whatever hotel I'm staying at. I'm obsessed with it. You can head to paleovalley.com skinny or use code skinny at checkout for 20% off your first purchase. That's paleovalley.com skinny or Use code skinny at checkout. You know how I know Vori's good? Because Sandy Brockman, my trainer, is so obsessed with what flatters the body.
- [32:21]
Carson
She's so good.
- [32:22]
Michael Bostic
She has such an eye about how to flatter the body and she was like Lauren you need viori leggings. And so I tried them, and not only did I fall in love with their leggings, I'm doing black right now because we're still in the midst of losing baby weight. But I also fell in love with their tops. They, like, hug you in. They're tight, they're black. They're amazing. Everything matches. It's a set. I just put, like, a little sweater over my shoulders. So I have my Vori leggings, I have my viori tank. And then I'll just do, like a little black sweater over it, and it's so cute. And then I'll do, like a pop of color on the shoe. So the other day I did, like, a neon orange, and it looked absolutely major. If you're unfamiliar with Vori, you have to check out this brand. It's truly an investment in your happiness. Okay. They're very specific when it comes to designing a look beyond the gym. So if you want to run errands like I do, or go grab a sparkling Americano, which is my new drink of choice, or you want to meet with friends or go to the office, you can do that so seamlessly after you work out. So I'll lift weights and go straight to the office, which is awesome. Get yourself some of the most comfortable and versatile clothing on The Planet at vuori.com skinny. That's V-O-R-I.com skinny Not only will you receive 20 off your first purchase, but enjoy free shipping on any US orders over 75 and free returns. Get 20 off your first order at vuori.com skinny.
- [33:47]
Carson
If someone's listening and they. They experience shame. When and how did you release the shame? Because when I see you today, I feel like you're very grounded, and I don't feel energetically that it's there anymore. So did you release it?
- [34:02]
Chris Appleton
Yeah, I think there was a point. I tell this story and it didn't happen too long ago, but I found myself being in situations that I just didn't like the outcome of. I kept finding myself in situations where I was like, I really need to change this pattern. So I. I love some therapy. I have a great therapist called John. Doesn't like to be mentioned, but he's an amazing guy. He works with a lot of people. I don't think you can get his number. I don't know how I got his. One day, someone gave it me. Anyway, he kind of saved my life in many ways, but I remember him saying, all right, you know what? We're Going to go back in. In time a little bit. And I'm like, all right, mate, let's go. Like, no, I'm just really not like. So I'm sitting there, and he's like, you know, I want you to close your eyes. And I'm like, oh, my God. Close my eyes. So he's like, talking about, can you remember a young memory of yourself? And I was like, yeah, I do remember one distinct memory. I was, like, 6, 7 years old, and I was standing at a window. I. I'm one of five kids. Life was always crazy and chaotic, but I remember being in the bedroom. I was looking outside England. It was pretty gray and green, pretty wet. But I remember just feeling really sad. He's like, how do you feel? I said, I just remember feeling kind of alone, I guess. I remember that feeling. It was quite a strong feeling. And I remember feeling different. I was dyslexic. I wasn't understood, you know, I wasn't like my brothers. I wasn't quite like my sisters. So he's like, well, if you could go back to that little boy now, you know, what do you think he needed to hear? And he's like. And I said, what do you mean? He said, well, the adult you now, if you could go back into that memory and you could say something to him, what do you think he needed to hear? And it just softened me. I just broke. I couldn't stop crying. I was not just crying. I was, like, ugly crying. For weeks, I kept saying to him, what did you do to me?
- [35:46]
Carson
Like a release.
- [35:48]
Lauren Everts
Well.
- [35:48]
Chris Appleton
Cause what I said, I was like. I think I just wanted to know it was gonna be okay. And that although you feel different now, and you don't feel like you blend one day, that'll be your superpower, so stick with it. But no one ever told me that. And I think I realized how mean I'd been to myself my whole life. How I'd abandoned that little kid. Exploring, doing things that kids do to do what Society. What I thought was the right thing to do. And it never allowed that kid to feel safe. And I think that was a moment of, like, shame for me. Although it sounds quite deep, it's just about connecting back to yourself. And, like, I could feel my feet on the ground. I could feel my hands on the sofa. And I think I could feel the air in my lungs, you know, it was just like my shoulders went down because I was just like, God, I've been so fucking mean to myself for what? For everyone else to prove these Kids at school wrong to prove the people that told me I would never do the COVID of Vogue, like, and laugh in my face. Like, for what? Like, I never allowed myself to truly be. And I think that was a big part of me letting go, ashamed, realizing that you can love yourself and it doesn't have to be an arrogant or big headed thing, it can just be a kindness to yourself. Still catch myself, I do it all the time. Like, I'll catch myself and I'll be like, fuck, that one piece of hair is out of place. Like, I've ruined it. The biggest moment of my life was probably the super bowl in terms of like visual people seeing my work on Jennifer Lopez. I had so many people message me after that was crazy. I had a huge jump in, like followers on social media. Because usually it's little things that make a difference. This was the one time I've had a big jump in something. I went home that night, everyone went out and celebrated. I went home, cried, didn't go out, and was tearing myself apart because she had this one piece of hair that fell in front of her face and it got stuck in a lash. She was trying to get it out and I couldn't enjoy the performance after that. I was like, I've ruined it. The hair ruined it. Like, I completely beat myself up.
- [37:45]
Lauren Everts
But in learning, you were likely the only person that noticed that 100%.
- [37:48]
Chris Appleton
But aren't we so conscious of doing that? But in learning the things I learn about how I speak to myself, like, instead of being that way now, like, yeah, I still got those moments. But instead of the volume of that hater inside your head being like a 10, I can turn it down to a 2 and I can acknowledge I'm just doing that thing I do where the haters in there and you kind of tell yourself apart and I can come back to like my adult self instead of being like that, I guess that younger version of myself. And I think we all do that all the time. The most time it happens I've seen in my life is when women or men sit in my chair in the hair salon. They usually look in the mirror and they're kind of like, it's the one time again you stop and you look and you're kind of looking at your alignment like, is this lighting bad? You know, you're like, fuck, I look bloated. Like, my God, my eyes are looking so tight. Do I need. Do you know how many women do this? Do I need? They're like this. Like, because it's the One time you're really just looking at yourself. You're really like checking everything out. And I think that's why they say the stylist chair is like a therapist, because you kind of a little bit vulnerable, you know, you kind of like, should I, you know, today you. Should I change my. Should I change my hair? Should I change the way I look?
- [38:49]
Carson
Like I absolutely.
- [38:51]
Lauren Everts
Cape. And then they got their hairs all.
- [38:52]
Carson
Matted down and, well, you look like cousin it. The hair is wet. It's like, yeah. I could see why people are like, ugh.
- [38:59]
Chris Appleton
And I think that's why people open up so much in the stylist chair, you know, that's why. But I realized it was so much deeper because even when you spoke about going into different areas and different looks and changing their hair, you could see people were so programmed to be like, no, this is what I'm supposed to do. This is what I'm supposed to have. Once you break free of that, it's really powerful and you can really, like grow and evolve. But a lot of people get stuck in this one place in their life that carry the whole, the whole, the whole life with them. You know, it's.
- [39:27]
Carson
I'm so curious, based on your childhood, how you parent differently your children. Yeah, what. What things do you do differently as a parent?
- [39:39]
Chris Appleton
I just think me and Kate, although it was very dysfunctional in terms of like, I was gay and we, you know, we broke up, we're still best friends. She had to obviously go through her process of healing. I went through mine and. But you, I guess as a unit, we stayed together as a family and we've always been that way. We just spent Christmas together and it was a real full circle moment because I brought a place in the UK and for a long time I couldn't go back to the uk. So I told the story about moving to the US and finding myself. Well, when I came back to the UK for work or jobs, I literally be in the car having. I'd have a panic attack, full. I couldn't. With the tightness in my chest, I'd have tears. And I think, what the fuck is wrong with me?
- [40:16]
Lauren Everts
I don't.
- [40:16]
Chris Appleton
I didn't understand it, but it was like post traumatic stress. It was like the thought of going back to that guy that I'd avoided for so long, that version of myself, I couldn't. And again, like in healing now, like, I've actually brought a house in the uk, I can go back and celebrate with my family and create a new story. And again, the book is about, like, it's never too late to make you come back and transform your life. And I was standing with Kate on New Year's Eve. I had my arm round her. The fireworks were going off, and she was like, you did good, Chris. You know, you did good. And there was a point in my life it could have been very different, and. Yeah, very different. I wouldn't have been here if I hadn't made those changes. So, like I say, I hope other people realize that they can do that, too.
- [40:54]
Carson
What is your relationship? Cause I see your beautiful daughter all over your Instagram. With your kids now, today.
- [41:00]
Chris Appleton
Oh, yeah, my parents. Well, I think we have, like, a very open, honest relationship. They've visually been exposed to so much of my life because it's on the Internet.
- [41:08]
Lauren Everts
Yeah.
- [41:08]
Chris Appleton
I mean, I got married on Kardashian. You know what I mean? They've seen so much of my life. They've lived it. And we've always had very open and honest conversations. I'm actually really proud of him. And, like, I was actually home at Christmas, and there was a situation I had with a family member where. It's funny, you think you. You think you're good, you're healed, but it's such a journey because, like, one person said something to me at the dinner table, and I was back to, like, 12 years old.
- [41:29]
Lauren Everts
I was like, what are your siblings?
- [41:31]
Chris Appleton
Yeah, they just. What they said, the way they said it, and I was putting my head down. I'm thinking, God, like, this is. Are we still in this place? Are we still here?
- [41:40]
Lauren Everts
You know?
- [41:40]
Chris Appleton
Cause you realize when you. When you do the work, you realize a lot of people around you, some people like to just stay comfortable, and they don't want to do the work. They want people around them to change.
- [41:48]
Lauren Everts
Or they want you to, or they want to hold you back and keep you the same.
- [41:51]
Chris Appleton
Totally. I'll be really honest. I actually left. I actually left the table, and I thought, you know, I need to get out here. My initial reaction was, I need to go back to la. I need to. I'm trying to, like, start a new beginning here. And it's just like, people don't change. I need to get out of here. And it was actually my daughter that inspired me because she said she came home and she was like, dad, look, I love you. And I want you to know that the way that person spoke to you and the way they actually spoke to her, she's like, I'm just going to draw a line. And she's like, that's just a boundary I just want you to respect because I want to keep that person at a distance, and it doesn't mean it has to be awkward. But that for me, is just, like, not what I want in my life. And I just want you to sort of know that. And she's the sweetest girl. And I was like, yeah. I was like, yeah, that. Okay.
- [42:35]
Lauren Everts
Yes.
- [42:36]
Chris Appleton
Well done. I'm like, yeah. So I was like, two things. One, I was like, God, I think we did a good job. And two, like, yes, you can be 21 and, like, respect yourself and set boundaries. I never thought you could do that. So I think hopefully, in the mistakes I've made, I've also educated them to maybe know to expect more for yourself, because I didn't know I had that voice at a young age.
- [42:56]
Lauren Everts
I think that's also sometimes hard for people when they're changing or working on themselves. Is unfortunately not every circumstance. But a lot of times family members are the ones that actually try to hold you back from that change because it's uncomfortable for many of them. Not everyone. Again, sometimes there's a lot of great and supportive families out there. This is maybe not the case for everyone, but there are instances where family members.
- [43:20]
Carson
We're not talking about my dad, who thinks I'm a professional tennis player, ski instructor. Well, that's supermodel.
- [43:28]
Lauren Everts
That's. That's different. That's.
- [43:29]
Chris Appleton
Wait, why does he think that? Just because he loves you, Is he just.
- [43:32]
Lauren Everts
Yeah, well, it's called delusion.
- [43:33]
Chris Appleton
But. But we call it different things.
- [43:35]
Lauren Everts
But it's also a nice kind of delusion because it's very supportive and loving and that you kind of. You'd want that instead of the reverse, which is like, hey, you can't do anything, and you'll never do anything. Right?
- [43:43]
Chris Appleton
Yeah, but.
- [43:44]
Lauren Everts
No, I think, you know, when family members sometimes see people changing their lives and improving and saying, hey, I'm not going to kind of repeat the pattern, and I'm going to do things differently, and I got to break out of whatever's going on. That is also uncomfortable because it's a. It's a reflection on, you know, the. The family itself.
- [44:02]
Chris Appleton
Totally. I mean, be honest, guys, have you. Obviously, you guys have been together how long?
- [44:06]
Carson
A long time.
- [44:06]
Lauren Everts
Long time. Before time existed.
- [44:08]
Chris Appleton
Just a long time. But, like, do you guys ever see anything in your dynamic, your relationship, of how you speak to each other or how you behave that you've recognized now that you inherited as a young age from seeing your parents and you know, that doesn't actually work. And there's other ways of doing it. Of course.
- [44:22]
Lauren Everts
No, of course. I mean, listen, I was raised in, in a household where it was like, there was plenty of love and support, but there was, like an expectation. Right, right. You know, my, I've said this as a running joke on the show. My, my, my grandmother is full Japanese woman. My mom's half Japanese. And in many Asian cultures, like, you don't get a lot of praise. It's, it's like if, like, for example, if you're a little kid and you go, hey, mom. Like, I, I, I went upstairs and I brushed my teeth today. Like, I mean, you're little. Like, it's like, yeah, of course. You're supposed to.
- [44:51]
Chris Appleton
You're supposed to.
- [44:51]
Lauren Everts
I got an A on my report card. It's like, yeah, of course.
- [44:53]
Chris Appleton
Yeah.
- [44:53]
Lauren Everts
It's the other stuff. It's like, if you fall short. And so I think in our relationship, I, we just had an argument in the car this morning. It's like, can you be more complimentary? Can you.
- [45:02]
Carson
No, no.
- [45:03]
Michael Bostic
This is what I said, Chris.
- [45:04]
Carson
I said, when you bring me my coffee in the morning, that sometimes you forget, could you have it, stack it with a compliment? So here's a theme for the day. Coffee and a compliment.
- [45:16]
Chris Appleton
Nice.
- [45:17]
Lauren Everts
That's okay. So, but how did you take, how did you tell.
- [45:20]
Chris Appleton
Did you take that as a criticism?
- [45:21]
Lauren Everts
Of course. No, but, but first. But, but, but the thing is literally proving. No, no, you're probating what you're saying, that it is easier for me to go and, like, do the things. Get up with the kids, like, do the things that, you know, I, I think are expected of what a husband and father should do without. I don't need acknowledgment for it, because.
- [45:44]
Chris Appleton
That'S what you do.
- [45:44]
Lauren Everts
But it's hard for me to then be like, oh, but I also need to the do, like, I have to think about that.
- [45:49]
Chris Appleton
Obviously you struggle with that maybe emotional part, because that's not what you got as a kid. So to be giving you a. You're like, well, of course. Why would I do that?
- [45:56]
Lauren Everts
Yeah. And again, I never didn't, I didn't ever not feel loved by my parents. And they're very complimentary of me as I've gotten older. And they say many nice things, but I, I even, I'm empathetic to them. Again, as you get older, you're like, okay, well, they probably didn't get those things. You just. So then you start to realize, okay, like, with My kids. I want to do more of that. But at the same time, I'm also like, you know, I don't want to praise them because they brush their teeth. It's like, you know, you also.
- [46:22]
Carson
There's a But does everyone in the room, Carson and Chris, agree that a coffee and a compliment is the easy little way to get a little romance in?
- [46:29]
Chris Appleton
I think it's nice to keep it, you know, spicy. But I think that is the best thing about relationships is it's a mirror. And unfortunately, that's like the dark side of relationships as well, is like, you get to see a mirror. Cause sometimes you see things you don't necessarily like. You're like, well, why would I do that? I've never done that. I never saw that as a kid. It's just not program in your head. And I think you just have to be open to, like, that's important to that person. So although it's not necessarily something I would naturally do, I'm gonna work on that to. And. But vice versa. There'll be something that means something to you where you're just like, what you know, and that's the give and take relationship.
- [47:01]
Carson
How would I give a compliment after I get my compliment in my coffee?
- [47:05]
Lauren Everts
I think the.
- [47:05]
Chris Appleton
I like it. It's kind of princess behavior. But obviously that's what you got. I'm getting from your dad that you got the princess. True.
- [47:12]
Lauren Everts
I love this. He knew what he married. I. I've thought about the order a lot in my life. It's like, coffee, compliment, blowjob.
- [47:18]
Carson
Great.
- [47:18]
Chris Appleton
Yeah, it's.
- [47:19]
Michael Bostic
Well, that's.
- [47:20]
Chris Appleton
I mean, come on. Come on, let's.
- [47:22]
Carson
Ccb.
- [47:25]
Lauren Everts
I have to have, like, you know, the Paplov dog thing with the. You know, they like, do the thing. I need.
- [47:29]
Carson
I'm fine with that. But coffee, compliment, blowjob.
- [47:31]
Lauren Everts
Can I have a coffee before everyone's happy? I think that the job of an evolved person as you go through life, man, whoever is that, you have to. You have to break patterns that are not like. You can't just say, like, oh, well, I was raised this way. My family was this way. I'm this way.
- [47:48]
Michael Bostic
Right?
- [47:48]
Lauren Everts
Like, you know, I used to get hit as a kid, so now I hit it. You can't. Right? Like you.
- [47:52]
Chris Appleton
But you know how many people do that. Sure. I think that's in relationships. You know how many people end up breaking because they don't want to change. People, like, don't want to change their habits. They don't want to stop and go, okay, so I mean, all the conversations I've had, like, I had great parents. I had, I thought, a very normal upbringing. But, like, there's certain things I inherited that just, like, don't suit me now, you know, because I moved away from it as well. Especially when you go back to it, you can really see it. But I think a lot of people just are so comfortable in, like, they're saying they don't want to change because change is hard.
- [48:20]
Lauren Everts
You know, I saw a bad relationship. Someone cheated this. So, like, that's what I do in my relationship. No, like, the job is to acknowledge the thing. And I think that what's interesting, as you evolve and as you. As you grow one, you. You're empathetic to your parents because you realize they probably didn't have. Of course, like, it sounds like your.
- [48:36]
Chris Appleton
Mother had the best job.
- [48:36]
Lauren Everts
Yeah, they did the best job, but just their best job is not like, you have a. Your job now is to do an even better job. I think, like, each generation should strive to be better than the last because we should.
- [48:48]
Chris Appleton
Like, there's so many more tools now to enable people to have that. Like, this conversation would never have been had, like, 20 years ago. And, I mean, people didn't talk about feelings. When my mom's mom and dad died, she read it on the front of a newspaper. No one told them they were dead. They didn't get to go to their funeral. They didn't do therapy. They just got on with life. Like, that was just life then. That's unheard of now, but you know what I mean? So, like, everything. Conversations need to happen to keep things evolving.
- [49:10]
Lauren Everts
And last thing, Lorna, I was even just thinking as you were telling your story, we're of similar age, but we come from the generation where to be a gay man or woman as a child, like, it was a taboo thing, like going through school. And I think a lot of the younger people listening to this, like what? Like, it's. It's. I don't say normal, but it's. It is not as taboo as it was when we were all growing up, right? And I think the converse, like, this conversation that we just had today for sure, was not taking place when we were in grade school.
- [49:40]
Chris Appleton
Thank God for shows like Heated Rivalry, because that's changing the dynamic. It's making people feel comfy. You know, it's creating healthy conversations and relationships that it's just a love story. And it's not just like, well, they're gay. Because it was almost like, even, like, with, like, brought back mountain or certain films. It was like just gay people watch that. Like a straight guy wouldn't necessarily watch it. Whereas now so many people. And this heated Ravi is so mainstream now. It's so refreshing to see.
- [50:03]
Carson
Tell Michael what it is because I can tell he doesn't know what it is.
- [50:06]
Chris Appleton
Love Story.
- [50:06]
Lauren Everts
No, I've seen.
- [50:07]
Chris Appleton
Talking about.
- [50:08]
Lauren Everts
Yeah, I mean, listen, I do pay attention. I mean, we have a lot of shows on Dear Media where people are. It's like a very popular show. People are talking about it.
- [50:14]
Chris Appleton
Totally.
- [50:14]
Lauren Everts
I'm not going to say I've been in the movie. Is it good?
- [50:16]
Michael Bostic
Do we need to watch it? Great.
- [50:17]
Chris Appleton
You should absolutely watch it.
- [50:18]
Michael Bostic
Okay.
- [50:18]
Chris Appleton
Yeah, but it's just the, you know, the.
- [50:20]
Carson
I'm sorry, I've been watching the Kardashians. I've been watching you. So now I have to switch also to this.
- [50:24]
Chris Appleton
You know, I've never watched it. I've watched like a couple of episodes in my whole time of. I think because I'm on it. I just don't watch it. I don't know why.
- [50:29]
Michael Bostic
You look great.
- [50:30]
Chris Appleton
Oh, really?
- [50:31]
Carson
Yeah.
- [50:32]
Chris Appleton
Do I get the filter?
- [50:33]
Carson
You look great. You look amazing. If there is someone who's listening that's hiding a part of themselves, what would you tell them to do? I think you're the perfect person to.
- [50:42]
Michael Bostic
Ask on this show.
- [50:43]
Chris Appleton
I think first of all, it's just about acknowledging that something's wrong. And a lot of people don't want to do that. So I write about the book as a chapter about saying the word fine. Like the four letter word fine. I hate, because most people use that as a facade. How you feeling? I'm fine. How's your relationships? Fine. How's work? Fine. How's your financial situation? Fine finds out fine is just ban fine. Because it's really just a facade of like, don't look at me. I don't want to acknowledge it. I don't want to deal with it. I don't really want to talk about it. And I think the first step in making a difference is accepting that something's wrong. Because if something feels wrong, it usually is. And you just got to explore what that is. Like I say it might be your marriage. It might just be fucking miserable. People move on and evolve. That's okay. It might be your job. Like, maybe finance isn't for you. You were told to do that, but you've always wanted to act. I don't know, it's. It's about living authentically and what actually works for you. And I think it's just the point you need to get to of like looking in the mirror and really looking and seeing if you're aligned with what you're seeing on the outside and how you feel on the inside. Because that's usually when you know something's off.
- [51:49]
Michael Bostic
One thing I do not forget when I travel is my bee propolis. This is like an essential when you travel. I spray it on my throat every single time I travel. Every single time I feel like I'm getting sick. My kids use it. I am obsessed with Beekeepers Naturals, so much so that I have invited the founder on the podcast twice because this is such a hack to use their B Propolis spray. It's honestly amazing. It kills germs on the spot while supporting your immune system. It has 300 plus essential vitamins, antioxidants and bioactive compounds. My kids love it. It tastes amazing. I love it. Like I said, it tastes amazing. And you get your daily dose of immunity. But you also get antioxidants like flavonoids, which we want because this fights against free radicals and it combats stress. But the most important thing, you guys, is it helps defend germs on the spot. They have a bunch of different things that I like on their site, but if I had to start with two, I would start with their best selling propolis throat spray that I'm talking about. They have one that they just launched that has slippery elm in it and menthol. So if you want it to be like cooling on a sore throat, it's really nice. I also love their little shots. They give you energy and I feel like they give you a lot of clarity. Today, Beekeepers Naturals is giving our listeners an exclusive offer. Go to beekeepers.com skinny or enter code skinny to get 20% off your order. That's B E-E K E E P E R S N-A T U R-A L S.com skinny or enter code Skinny. Beekeepers Naturals products are also available at Target, Whole foods, Walmart, Amazon CVS and Walgreens. Did you guys know that almost 90% of new parents on Bobi are combo feeding? So they're using both breast milk and formula to feed their baby. This is not talked about enough. So whether you're exclusively formula feeding or you're combo feeding or you just want like a backup can, Bobi is the formula that I trust to deliver safe, complete nutrition to my baby's bottle. Here's the deal. We got to interview the founder and Bobbi's organic It's European style and it's clinically crafted to mere breast milk. So this is really like very interesting if you want to get nerdy with me. It has naturally occurring mfgm, DHA and choline to support brain development. It also has a 6040 way to cast in protein blend for easy healthy digestion. And the best part is every single batch goes through 2,000 plus safety and quality checks before leaving their US manufacturing facility. It was also named top choice by Consumer Reports after extensive testings for heavy metals and chemicals. If you're looking for a formula that's USDA organic, EU Organic and Clean label Project Purity Award winning, you have to check them out. If you want to feed with confidence too, head to hi bobbi.com that's hibbi.com to find the formula trusted by parents and loved by their baby. 700k and counting. Go to hibobi.com quick break to talk.
- [54:59]
Lauren Everts
About Cachava Lauren and I are so focused on our health and fitness goals always. But this year in 2026, I'm really kicking it up a notch, wanting to get the proper supplementation, the proper protein and I also want to make sure that I'm getting it through the right kinds of products. High quality with high delivery systems. This is why I love talking about cachava. With just two scoops you can get 25 grams of protein, 6 grams of fiber, which is so important. Greens, adaptogens and so much more. What I like to do is make my personalized smoothi that I have pretty much every single day after I work out. I love the chocolate flavor Cachava because it goes with a little bit of cacao. I also add a little bit of whole milk. Then I also add in one banana and a little bit of spinach with some blueberries. This is going to make an incredible protein shake that gives me 25 grams of protein and fiber. What I've noticed since taking Cachava is I have a great amount of energy which supports me all day. I also have great digestion which keeps me regular with the fiber and the probiotics. And of course I'm building strength gains and muscle. They have all sorts of essential minerals which is going to help with cognition and it's going to help nourish your immune system with their vitamin C, zinc and probiotics. It's non gmo, there's no soy, no animal products, no gluten and no preservatives. Cachava just provides clean nutrition to fuel wherever your day takes you. No fillers, no Nonsense. So like I said, just add two scoops to get 25 grams of protein and 6 grams of fiber. You can try cachava risk free with their love it guarantee thousands of rave reviews. Don't just take it from me. So check them out. Stick with your wellness goals. Go to kachava.com and you use code skinny for 15% off. That's Kachava K A C H- A V A.com code skinny.
- [56:28]
Michael Bostic
Introducing the skinny confidential ice roller. Reimagined. Think sleeker lines, a softer pink, a custom buttery dust bag and a silver roller. Not pink anymore. That is ice cold. I wanted to do a zhuzh on the iconic ice roller. I wanted to to update it. This ice roller for me has always been more than just a tool. It's about helping us de puff and sculpt and calm the skin in a way that feels intentional. And I wanted the ice roller to feel evolved. It's changed. You've changed. So, yes, the new gorgeous, stunning, beautiful ice roller is still going to do the same things. It reduces puffiness and redness in your face. I used it this morning before I put on my makeup. It definitely helps with the under eye bags. Of course, it helps boost circulation and radiance. I just feel like it really helps stimulate blood flow and gives me that tighter, more radiant skin. And then it also is known to give you a smoother, tighter looking skin.
- [57:32]
Carson
So what I like to do is.
- [57:33]
Michael Bostic
I like to combine facial massage with cold therapy. And this really helps give you a really nice foundation before you even apply your skin care. This ice roller for me is a full circle moment. I think that a lot of you bought the ice roller, you know, five, six years ago when we launched it. And now I am launching something that feels more in alignment with where you're at.
- [57:58]
Carson
It's so beautiful.
- [57:59]
Michael Bostic
You guys like it's just softer and more effortless in every way. And I really put my own touches on every single little step from the packaging to the colors to how it feels to even the roller. It's all been elevated just for you. So the ritual, the Lauren ritual is you do cold therapy to help fight inflammation. You roll it, you glide it across your face. I put it on my jawline, my neck, I roll it down. Your skin is just going to appear smoother and tighter before you go in for the kill with the skincare and the makeup, don't skip the cold therapy. The new ice roller is an upgrade designed to meet the standards of today. And I hope you guys love it as Much as I do. This is the beauty tool that started it all redesigned to evolve with you. I'm showing it on YouTube too. If you're on YouTube, if you're seeing me visually, get it. Why it's hot@shopskinnyconfidential.com that's shopskinnyconfidential.com.
- [58:57]
Carson
You were. Had a very public relationship. It was on Keeping up with the Kardashians. It was very public. You guys broke up. When you look back with. You have foresight now to look back. Is it foresight or hindsight?
- [59:10]
Michael Bostic
Hindsight.
- [59:10]
Carson
You have hindsight to look back. What would you have done differently? Or are you so happy that it happened the way it happened and you have the tools now to move forward?
- [59:20]
Chris Appleton
I don't think I have any regrets in my life. I've done things in my life that I don't think worked for me, and I've learned a lot from them. I think it was probably more about hope. You know, I don't think it's always about. Some people think going fast is, like. About being reckless, and that kind of is what's pushed out in the media. Me personally, I think I was actually more just hopeful that, you know, love wins and love is enough. I think I learned truly love really isn't enough. I think you have to have alignment. I think in all the relationships I've been in, on reflection, like, I've gone into situations where it was easier to have someone there than to be alone, because I don't really want to face myself. And I. I realized that I give love away, that I should be giving to myself and made it all about them. And I think probably my toxic trait was thinking I could fix people or wanting to even engage in that, you know, like, hearing that people wanted to be better versions of themselves, and I could encourage that and bring it out in them because, like I say in a job, it worked great professionally. I made a whole career out of it. But personally, like, in emotionally, like, I was starving myself because I was just giving to other people what, you know, I should have given myself. I think now, I mean, I've been single for two years, and it's been a really happy two years. It's been a really fulfilled two years where I think for the first time in my life, like, I'm comfortable being on my own. I'm happy, I feel settled. I feel so protective of my life now. I've got two beautiful kids. I've always been protective of them, but just not of myself. Being in that environment. So I'd bring things in which didn't serve me. And I think you have to learn. I think there's a lot of lessons that I've learned that I now I'm incredibly protective of people that come into my life. And also, it's like buying a house. You know, when you buy your first house as a kid, like, well, 19 hours or however you are, 20, 25, 30, like, you get a house and you're like, I love this place. Got doors and windows, man. I've got my own space. I can do what I want. But then, like, as you buy houses and you move along, you realize you're. I guess you refine your taste. You're like, ah, you know, I really don't like those small windows. I really want. I hated living in that dark apartment because I always had the lights on. So every time you kind of get more refined, so the amount of houses that you could actually live in is less because you know your taste, you know what you like, you know what works for you and what doesn't work. So I'm at a place now where I guess the pool of people is smaller because I know where I'm at in my life and I know what I want and what I don't want. Whereas I think before I was just like, oh, this is a house, I'll live in it. Whereas now I am, you know, way more selective. And you should refine your search. You should learn. Everything I've been in, I've learned so much from and tried to, you know, evolve from that. I think that's a good mistake.
- [62:01]
Lauren Everts
Twice when you have had the experiences you've had, you know, you've had different houses, you've done a different relationship, you've had a family, you have kids. Like, I think that the reverse of that is true. As you age, if you have not had that, for example, if you. If you get older and older and older and you're. And you haven't experienced all those things and you're. And you're getting more and more particular and you're not open to things. I think that can be a slippery slope totally. Because then all of a sudden you're like. You get. You're like, nothing's ever good enough.
- [62:31]
Carson
So what he's saying is, he's saying that you've had all these experiences, so.
- [62:34]
Michael Bostic
You'Re able to refine.
- [62:35]
Lauren Everts
You've based this off of, say, trying a million different things and now knowing what's right for you. A lot of times people isolate, isolate, and they don't try enough things, but they get particular about 31 flavors they miss. Like, we had a dating coach on here, and she was saying, like, one of the biggest problems with some of these online dating platforms is the filters that people use. Like, trying to filter out a million things.
- [62:58]
Chris Appleton
I love to give a FaceTime. I like to just check.
- [63:00]
Carson
Do a FaceTime.
- [63:01]
Chris Appleton
Yeah. If they don't answer, I'm like, not.
- [63:03]
Lauren Everts
Even the filters of the look. But he's saying, like, the filter, you have to be this tall and this. And you have to weigh this. Like, meaning, like, they. Like, they. They miss a whole population.
- [63:10]
Chris Appleton
You know what I love asking. I'm gonna ask you, Ty. I'm gonna ask you to this question. This is the first. Well, it's not the first, but I usually get into this on the first date. So I'll ask them what. What your toxic trait is. Do you know what your toxic trait is?
- [63:21]
Lauren Everts
I have a few.
- [63:22]
Chris Appleton
Just give me one.
- [63:22]
Michael Bostic
Come on.
- [63:23]
Lauren Everts
I can be dismissive. I can stop.
- [63:25]
Chris Appleton
That's dismissive. All right, that's cool. But that's good because you know that by itself. So if. Has that been told to you by your partner or have you. Is that come up in arguments, Conversations?
- [63:34]
Lauren Everts
No. Like, I know you know, I talk too fast. Sometimes I come off as not listening. Here's my. One of my biggest toxic traits is I am listening and I really am paying attention, but I don't acknowledge people's. So it's. It looks dismissive and like, I'm not paying attention.
- [63:51]
Chris Appleton
Did you catch yourself? You catch yourself that. Like, that's a thing sometimes. Yeah.
- [63:54]
Lauren Everts
No, I know. And I can see sometimes when I meet new people, they're like, fuck, is this guy paying attention? And I am, but I just am. I don't know how. Would you explain it?
- [64:00]
Chris Appleton
No, it's good. I think you explained it Great. So what's your toxic trait?
- [64:03]
Michael Bostic
Well, I only have one.
- [64:05]
Carson
My toxic trait is the silent treatment.
- [64:08]
Chris Appleton
Really? Oh, my God. That's the death. I hate that. Because I hate it.
- [64:12]
Carson
It's not even that. I'm trying to use it as a weapon.
- [64:15]
Chris Appleton
You just shut down.
- [64:16]
Lauren Everts
Yes, you are.
- [64:16]
Carson
No, it's that I can't give anything.
- [64:21]
Chris Appleton
Be honest.
- [64:21]
Lauren Everts
We're having an honest conversation. You don't try to use it as a weapon.
- [64:24]
Carson
I can't give my capacity.
- [64:26]
Chris Appleton
She's giving it you now.
- [64:27]
Carson
I need to give my capacity to other things. So if someone's draining my energy, like, I can't give capacity. Like, if.
- [64:34]
Michael Bostic
If a text message comes in and.
- [64:35]
Carson
It'S 65 pages long. Or a voice note for three hours. Like, I can't drain my capacity, so I just, just don't.
- [64:44]
Michael Bostic
I can't.
- [64:45]
Chris Appleton
But again, like, are you in a place in your life now where, you know, you do that you can catch yourself. I'm doing that thing.
- [64:51]
Carson
I got it. 10, 000 comments on tick tock about how toxic.
- [64:56]
Chris Appleton
But at least now you can acknowledge and you can catch it. Look, you're always going to have these traits, these. I'm always triggered all the time thinking I can fix people wanting to help people be a better version of themselves. Because I've realized in relationships it doesn't matter. You could tell me you're a billionaire, it doesn't mean you are. Whereas I think before, I'm like, oh, great, you know, cool. I mean, not that I care about money. I don't at all. I'm giving it as an example. But people that would say, oh, you know, I know I have this problem, but like, I want to get to this place. And I'm like, oh, you know, I can help support that. Whereas in actual fact, I think people tend to be who they are unless they're actively working themselves in therapy, doing the work, acknowledging it. A lot of people, it's like saying, oh, I really want to be fit and go to the gym. But it's not going to the gym or going twice and being like, so.
- [65:39]
Carson
You go along with the delusions of grandma, not anymore.
- [65:42]
Chris Appleton
I'm allergic to it. Even if I try now, I'll still see things sometimes and I know the dynamic I'm attracted to and I'll catch it and I'll be like, oh, cool. And then I'm like, so you would be. It's like an alcoholic. It's like once you've done the 12 step program, I can look at a drink and I can be like, nice. And then I can be like, if.
- [66:01]
Lauren Everts
It was a person and they were like a fixer up, or you'd be like, oh, I'm the guy to fix this up. Like that. And you would be attracted to that.
- [66:06]
Chris Appleton
I think I was just attracted to things that in all my relationships. Like things that, like, I guess were. It felt exciting and it was lots of highs and lows and I could help them be a better version of themselves because, you know, that's what I was told they wanted and, you know, just overextending myself. Overextending, you know, and accommodating. And it's funny because in my career it worked like you know, your acts of service, you're doing that all the time. You're providing. You know, I don't walk in and Jayla's like, how are you? I'm like, well, I'm tired because I've been promoting this book and my voice is. You're just like, I'm great. Thank you. How you know, you're there to provide a service, but to an extent, you know, in a relationship, you can't. Sometimes you can. You gotta be allowed to be seen. I think I never allowed my. I never was really seen. I just always provided.
- [66:48]
Carson
You know, I also think with you too, because you are around a high performers all the time and you yourself.
- [66:56]
Michael Bostic
Are such a high performer.
- [66:58]
Chris Appleton
Yeah.
- [66:58]
Carson
That you're constantly seeing these high performers get better and better and better. Like you watch the Kardashians and you see Kim doing the law school thing. Like, that's gotta be so inspiring to you that she's already like at the top of the mountain, but she wants to go higher. And when you're around that, like, subconsciously it's rubbing off on you. And you're also a high performer, clearly, with your book and what you're doing. And so when you see someone and maybe I'm wrong, but when you're dating someone and maybe they're not a high performer, you want to help them get there.
- [67:27]
Chris Appleton
Yeah, totally. Or if they want to be. I don't know. I think I've always just. When things have happened where I should have just probably realized that that's not right. I've stayed for too long and maybe not just saw it for what it was. Try to see maybe a fantasy version of it because I think I probably. I'll be really. I think I saw that when my mom and dad, I think they both come from traumatic childhoods. My dad got put in a home when he was five and they've lived together their whole lives and you know, they have their thing going on, but a lot of it was about survival. It was like stay together for the kids. It was about, you know, put the kids first and. And, you know, I think there's lots of stuff that they pushed under the rug, which some stuff just wasn't okay. And they probably should have separated, but they were too. There was too much fear around separating because when you've lost a family from such a young age, your family, you just. You want to keep the dynamic together. You don't want to break it, you know. So I think I inherited some of those things. So, like, just stay in Just for the sake of it. And not really. Just like I say, my daughter, when she came into me, and she's just like, hey, dad, like, love you. I just want to put this boundary in place and move on. I'm like, cool. And she does that with her boyfriend. They have a great relationship. He's really. He's really avoidant. And she's more anxious attachment. And they both recognize that. And they tell me this. They do therapy. They talk because they want to understand each other. They have a great relationship. They really love each other. But there's certain times, like in confrontation or something where, you know, she needs more reassurance and he's just shuts down, which is like, that doesn't work. It's like this push, pull. So now they've both acknowledged they have these things, and they want to kind of just meet in the middle and kind of understand each other a bit more, which is, I think, so great. I'm like, go for it. Like, love it.
- [69:01]
Carson
What does it take to date Chris Appleton at this point? What is on your menu?
- [69:08]
Chris Appleton
I think honesty is really important to me.
- [69:10]
Carson
Let's put it out in the ether. Honesty.
- [69:12]
Chris Appleton
Honesty is so important to me.
- [69:13]
Michael Bostic
Okay.
- [69:14]
Chris Appleton
I think someone that's really passionate. I don't care what you do. You can work at Starbucks if you love what you do. I want it. You know, I love that.
- [69:19]
Michael Bostic
Okay.
- [69:19]
Chris Appleton
I think someone that's fun. I love to laugh. I think it's really important. But I think probably one of the most important is, like, just the intention of someone saying and knowing who they are and truly being that and not just trying to give me a version of themselves that they think I want to hear about. I think that's really important. And someone that I know wants to live life. My. My end goal in life is to die with memories, not dreams. You know, I want to live my life. And see, I. I try and practice being grateful. Like, every day I try and. And just think of something that I'm grateful for, and it's easy to be reminded. But even just to be here now with you guys, I'm grateful for this experience and this opportunity. I'm grateful that, hey, after, like, 30 years, I brought a book out about my life. I'm grateful I get to share that with people. I'm grateful that, like, my kids are healthy. I don't know. There's so many things in this life, you only have to pick up your phone and go on Instagram or TikTok, and you can feel like, why have I not got this. Why have I not got that? So I think gratitude is really powerful.
- [70:13]
Carson
Are you grateful that Kris Jenner wrote the forward?
- [70:16]
Chris Appleton
Oh, my God, how great. She's so sweet. I did. She called her before we came here. We had a little chat as we got things coming up this year. I was like, you know what? 2025 was a good year for you, Chris, because that phase. And then she's like, oh, she's so happy. She's just having a good time. It's funny, when I first did her hair, I'd only done her hair. Last year, after all the years I've known the family, I'd never done Chris's hair. I was kind of scared. She's like, I had stories, you know, like, you have to be there on time. She's very prompt, you know, And I'm always a little late. I mean, I don't know. I think it's my adhd. I'm like, I've got time to do this. I'm like, oh, look. Look at the birds. Anyway, we're in Paris. Kim has a robbery. I was with Kim when that was when I first started working with. When she first got robbed. So then fast forward, what is it? Ten years later, we're in Paris again, and she's going for the trial. She's like, do you mind doing my mom's hair?
- [71:06]
Lauren Everts
That's how long it took for them to do that.
- [71:07]
Chris Appleton
Yeah, it takes forever. So I'm like, yeah, sure, I'll do it. But then everyone, like, I'm like, so, you know, I usually find out what's Chris like, you know, and they're like, well, she'll be there. You know, the call time's at 5 in the morning. She'll be in the chair at 4:45, so don't be late. So I come in. I'm like, I'll be there at like. I think it was there at 4:45. And I was like, that to me is like, you know, early. And she's like, morning. And I'm like, oh, she's ready. Okay, Right. I'll just get right into it. So she's sitting in the chair and she's like, just blow it out. And I'm like, nah, why would we do that? Like, it took me 10 years to get my hands on you. You've got this new face which looks amazing. Let's do a wig. Let's do something different. So we had so much fun. Like, I remember doing something different to her. She had like, the bob. It was like the slick Bob. It's just, like, a little longer. It was still shot, but it's a little different. And she, like, help herself, you know, she was like, all right. You know, she's Chris Jenner, and she's, like, feeling a little different. It's exciting when someone sees you and can kind of help you get to a different place and where you're at in your life. So we did this event with each of her a couple of months ago, and she actually started crying when she was talking. She got really emotional because we were talking to an audience of people about when I first did her hair, and she said, you know, I've had this short pixie haircut my whole life. And Chris looked at me and was like, let's do something different. And she said, I'm just so grateful that you saw that in me. Because, you know, most people would just keep her in a box. We love to keep people in boxes of, like, that's what you do, and that's what you have. And she's like, you saw me and gave me the opportunity to grow. And she's like, I'm so grateful for that. And now she. You know, for a 70s, she had her hair pinned up. And she's always doing something different now. And I. I love that. But, like, it's never too late to transform your life and make you come back. And if anyone's an example of that, it's Chris. You know, she's having a great time doing it.
- [72:47]
Carson
You know whose pixie cut we're gonna transform? Michael Bosticks.
- [72:52]
Chris Appleton
I think so. Right, let's go, you guys. I feel like the hair. Guys, for anyone that I get texts about this haircut, this problem, there's an issue in the marriage of the hair.
- [73:02]
Michael Bostic
This is the issue.
- [73:03]
Lauren Everts
She doesn't like.
- [73:03]
Carson
First of all, everyone needs to go buy the book. Your roots don't define you. It's on Amazon. I got the Kindle version, and I have the hard copy. As you can see on YouTube, it's completely bookmarked. It's a really good book. I really enjoyed it. I wanted to talk to Chris again. He had come on the show the first time, and this conversation's been amazing. So thank you, thank you.
- [73:22]
Lauren Everts
Thank you for doing that.
- [73:23]
Chris Appleton
I really wanted to come back. I actually think I DM'd you.
- [73:25]
Michael Bostic
You.
- [73:25]
Carson
But I was like, yeah, this will be amazing.
- [73:27]
Chris Appleton
You never answered it for ages. It's like, you.
- [73:29]
Carson
Well, I was like, doing the silent.
- [73:30]
Lauren Everts
No, you know what? I gotta.
- [73:32]
Carson
I'm gonna be honest. I'm not in my DMs as much.
- [73:34]
Michael Bostic
As I should be.
- [73:35]
Lauren Everts
No.
- [73:35]
Carson
And I thank God you, like, set like pin.
- [73:38]
Lauren Everts
Like we have another guest coming later this afternoon. Like, and I, you know, I was like, looking at. And I was like, okay, let me go on the social. And I went to the DM and I have messages from like 2022. And I'm like, oh. And I'm like, when she comes on.
- [73:52]
Chris Appleton
You guys having a life.
- [73:53]
Lauren Everts
But, you know, I just. The problem is with the. The DMs can be a dangerous thing.
- [73:58]
Chris Appleton
But when you're single, then. Are you.
- [73:59]
Lauren Everts
Yeah, I'm sure.
- [74:00]
Carson
I'm sure you have a lot of blue check marks.
- [74:02]
Chris Appleton
Some of the things people say.
- [74:03]
Lauren Everts
You know what? I imagine if you're single, you're in the DMs. Wait, hold on.
- [74:05]
Carson
I have to ask one more question. And you can just say yes or no. Is there a lot of straight men that are DMing you? Yes. It's a yes.
- [74:14]
Chris Appleton
Yeah, I mean, it's interesting. That.
- [74:16]
Lauren Everts
Or are they straight?
- [74:17]
Carson
Jeffree Star already told me about this.
- [74:19]
Michael Bostic
He told me off air.
- [74:21]
Chris Appleton
Yeah, I mean, it's interesting what you see in your DMs compared to real life.
- [74:26]
Lauren Everts
I was gonna say. Cause when I go into a gay bar, I don't ever get the thing that says, you don't belong here. People are pretty nice to me in the bar when I go in.
- [74:32]
Carson
Yeah, you do get looked at, I would say, more by gay men than women.
- [74:36]
Lauren Everts
You know, it's kinda like, listen, it's appreciated. It's nice to be acknowledged.
- [74:41]
Chris Appleton
Yeah, he's a hot guy.
- [74:42]
Carson
He's a hot guy. He's a great ass. I get it.
- [74:44]
Lauren Everts
I will say, people were much nicer to me when I lived in West Hollywood. And now I'm out here in Texas and it's a little bit harder. I don't know, maybe.
- [74:51]
Michael Bostic
So this is.
- [74:52]
Carson
We're gonna do a live haircut on YouTube, everyone. Not a haircut, a hairstyle.
- [74:57]
Chris Appleton
Little hairstyle. Yeah.
- [74:58]
Carson
With some products.
- [74:59]
Chris Appleton
Yeah.
- [75:00]
Carson
But requested by me because I can't. I.
- [75:02]
Lauren Everts
But here's.
- [75:02]
Carson
We gotta mix it up.
- [75:03]
Lauren Everts
She. I will say I'm supposed to get a haircut tomorrow. So you're getting me at like the tail end of like, out of control.
- [75:10]
Carson
So should you. Should he go sit right here?
- [75:12]
Michael Bostic
Chris.
- [75:12]
Carson
Where's she sit?
- [75:12]
Lauren Everts
We really do something.
- [75:13]
Carson
Yeah, we're doing it. Okay.
- [75:14]
Chris Appleton
We should sit. We should get a chance.
- [75:15]
Lauren Everts
We won't make it to the audio. So if people want to see this, they gotta.
- [75:17]
Carson
Before we go though, give us a wrap on where to find you and purchase the book and all the things.
- [75:22]
Chris Appleton
So Chris Appleton, one my social handles and if you want to get my book, it's a linking bio, but it's available on Amazon, Harper Collins, and it's for anyone that's ever said, is this it? If you want to transform your life, create your comeback, this is for you. Say fun read. It's definitely got some exciting stories in it, make you laugh, make you cry. And yeah, it's a part of me that maybe people don't know.
- [75:44]
Lauren Everts
Congratulations.
- [75:45]
Chris Appleton
Thank you.
- [75:45]
Lauren Everts
No easy thing.