Podcast Summary: Chris Appleton On Finding Your True Identity, Resilience, & Breaking His Silence To Live Authentically

The Skinny Confidential Him & Her Show – February 5, 2026

Overview of the Episode

This episode welcomes celebrated celebrity hairstylist, TV personality, author, and dad, Chris Appleton, for a deeply personal and unfiltered conversation. Hosts Lauryn and Michael Bosstick, joined by Carson, guide Chris through his childhood struggles, coming out story, experiences with bullying, personal resilience, and the journey to authentic living. With signature candor, Chris opens up about the darkest moments of his life (including a suicide attempt), shares actionable lessons on self-acceptance, family, therapy, and gives rare insights into the beauty industry and working with global superstars. The discussion is peppered with memorable moments, humor, and practical advice for anyone considering a life transformation or seeking inner alignment.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Pressure and Meaning Behind Celebrity Glam (01:18–03:37)

• Chris talks about prepping JLo for the Golden Globes and the pressure of public expectation:
  • "I still get nervous before every big thing because I care, I guess. You know, because I care." – Chris (01:30)
  • The stakes of being scrutinized online and wanting clients to feel seen and empowered.
• The emotional aspect of his craft: it's more than hair – it's about confidence.

2. Early Roots: Family, Bullying, and Discovering Identity (04:17–07:06)

• Chris recounts styling his mother’s hair at age nine, an early “superpower” that shaped his path.
• Struggles with dyslexia, being labeled "stupid," and finding affirmation through making others feel good.
• Faced intense bullying—“beaten up, spat on… punched in the face, just because I did hair and because they thought I was gay.” (06:00)
• He internalized the need to prove others wrong and suppressed his true self for years.

3. Coming Out: The Complexity of Sexuality and Social Conditioning (07:13–11:13)

• Explores his hetero relationship, lack of early gay experiences, and deep-seated fear tied to HIV stigma:
  • "I just never allowed myself to stop and look in the mirror because from that young age, I was very fixated on proving everyone wrong." (10:09)
• Even visiting a gay bar in youth, felt like an outsider—powerful anecdotes revealing internalized homophobia and societal narratives.

4. The Power of Childhood Programming and Breaking Free (11:13–14:31)

• How family, teachers, and offhand comments in childhood create lifelong scripts and self-limits.
• Chris describes the vulnerable position of clients in a stylist’s chair—uncovering deep identity blocks and helping people move beyond them.
• “The real beauty is getting aligned on the inside.” (13:08)

5. Scratching Beneath the Surface: Mental Health and Living Authentically (14:47–19:54)

• Chris describes rewriting his book to include his lowest moments, rather than just a glamorized version.
• Opening up about his suicide attempt as the darkest period in his life:
  • “It was always my biggest, darkest secret. I swore no one would ever know about it. There’s so much shame around it…I couldn’t take that information in.” (16:26)
• The pain of coming out to his children, feeling his kids would be better off without a “gay dad.”
• A turning point: waking up in the hospital and quietly deciding, for the first time, to just accept himself.

6. Universality of Struggle, Envy, and Social Comparison (19:54–22:30)

• Lauryn & Michael emphasize that even celebrities’ exceptional achievements stem from overcoming real, universal struggles.
• Chris discusses the “envy” chapter in his book, seeing comparison as toxic, yet suggesting people use role models for growth instead of fuel for resentment.

7. The Burden and Double-Edged Sword of Fame (22:46–25:01)

• Lauryn details the isolation and scrutiny that comes with public life—a reality behind the “cherry-picked” appeal of fame.

8. Acceptance, Change, and Finding Alignment (25:04–27:51)

• Chris describes the difficulty of coming out and the sense of freedom in moving to the US, escaping relentless narratives about his identity.
• “There was a freedom for me being able to start again…without all of these conversations going on around me.” (26:52)
• He admits to continuing old patterns in relationships—giving love outwardly but not inwardly.

9. Finding & Releasing Shame Through Therapy (34:01–37:45)

• Shares a transformative therapy session:
  • “If you could go back into that memory and you could say something to him, what do you think he needed to hear?...I just wanted to know it was gonna be okay.” (35:47)
• Realizing the importance of being kind to oneself, and how self-talk can crush or empower.

10. Parenting, Family Patterns, & Evolving Generational Narratives (39:27–43:51)

• Chris reflects on co-parenting with Kate and how he parents differently from his own upbringing.
  • Full-circle moment: “Kate saved my life. I remember laying there and I just was like, so I didn’t die. And I remember thinking, well, I don’t think I could hate myself any more than I did and feel any more shame or try and get away from myself anymore.” (18:02)
• Discusses setting boundaries, handling family resistance to change, and championing his children to expect more from themselves.

11. Breaking Generational Patterns in Relationships (44:01–48:47)

• Conversation shifts to how childhood patterns shape adult relationships.
• Michael and Lauryn debate giving and receiving validation, acknowledging the complexities of evolving love languages within partnerships.
• “The job of an evolved person as you go through life…is that you have to break patterns…You can’t just say, like, oh, well, I was raised this way, my family was this way, I’m this way.” – Lauryn (47:30)

12. “It’s Never Too Late to Transform” – On Change and Resilience (48:47–50:02)

• Chris notes: “There’s so many more tools now…Conversations need to happen to keep things evolving.”
• Speaks on how the environment for LGBTQ+ youth is (thankfully) changing.

13. Advice for Hiding Parts of Yourself / Reclaiming Authenticity (50:32–51:49)

• Chris’s advice: Be honest about what’s not working and stop using “I’m fine” as a shield.
  • “I hate [the word ‘fine’] because most people use that as a facade…The first step in making a difference is accepting that something’s wrong…If something feels wrong, it usually is.” (50:43)

14. Relationships, Vulnerability, and Setting Boundaries (58:57–70:12)

• Chris openly explores lessons from his public relationships, why loving someone isn’t enough, and his personal journey to comfort with solitude.
• “I give love away, that I should be giving to myself…personally I was starving myself because I was just giving to other people what, you know, I should have given myself.” (59:33)
• Talks about his “toxic trait” (over-accommodation, attempting to fix people), and how awareness has shifted his patterns.
• Fun relationship banter: Michael and Lauryn expose their own “toxic traits,” sparking discussion about self-awareness in love.

15. What It Takes to Date Chris Appleton (69:01–70:12)

• Looking for honesty, passion, humor, self-knowledge, and gratitude.
  • “My end goal in life is to die with memories, not dreams.”

16. Celebrity Glam Moments & Memorable Clients (71:05–72:47)

• Shares the story behind finally styling Kris Jenner, her transformation, and the emotional power of being “seen” beyond the box others put her in.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On the Power of Caring:
  "I think the day I don't feel that way is maybe the day it's over." – Chris Appleton (03:37)
• On Childhood and Programming:
  "We carry these ideas for our whole lives from someone that, you know, probably meant nothing in our lives, but they once said something to us, and we carry it." (05:18)
• On Authenticity:
  "The real beauty is getting aligned on the inside. And I really encourage people in the book to really take a long, hard look in the mirror." (13:08)
• On Surviving Suicide & Acceptance:
  "I just felt like they were gonna be different. They're gonna have a gay dad. They're gonna get bullied. And I thought it'd be better for them to have a dad that was dead, honestly, than gay." (17:56) "What about if I just accept it?...That was the beginning of my journey." (18:37)
• On Shame and Self-Compassion:
  "I realized how mean I'd been to myself my whole life...I think that was a moment of, like, shame for me...But it's just about connecting back to yourself." (36:11)
• On Evolution and Self-Love:
  "It's never too late to make you come back and transform your life." (40:16)
• On Break-Throughs in Therapy:
  "I was just like, God, I've been so fucking mean to myself for what?" (36:26)
• On What It Takes to Date Chris:
  "My end goal in life is to die with memories, not dreams. You know, I want to live my life." (69:19)
• On Letting Go of 'Fine':
  "Fine is just ban fine. Because it's really just a facade of like, don't look at me. I don't want to acknowledge it." (50:43)
• On Gratitude and Perspective:
  "I'm grateful for this experience and this opportunity...There's so many things in this life, you only have to pick up your phone and go on Instagram or TikTok, and you can feel like, why have I not got this. Why have I not got that? So I think gratitude is really powerful." (69:48)

Timestamps for Important Segments

• Nervousness & Preparing for Big Celebrity Events: 01:18–03:37
• Childhood, Bullying, and Internalized Messaging: 04:17–07:06
• Coming Out and Sexuality: 07:13–11:13
• On the Mirror and Identity: 11:13–14:31, 13:08 Key Quote
• Mental Health, Suicide Attempt, and Acceptance: 14:47–19:54, 16:26, 18:01
• Envy, Comparison, and Fame's Double Edge: 21:08–25:01
• Therapy & Overcoming Shame: 34:01–37:45
• Parenting and Breaking Patterns: 39:27–43:51, 40:16
• Relationship Patterns and Awareness: 44:01–48:47
• How to Start Living Authentically: 50:32–51:49
• Relationship Wisdom and Toxic Traits: 58:57–66:48
• What Chris Looks for in a Partner: 69:01–70:12
• Transforming Kris Jenner (client story): 71:05–72:47

Final Takeaways

Chris Appleton’s story is one of courage, healing, and a relentless pursuit of authentic living. By facing his deepest shame and trauma, he’s carved out a life where outer transformation is matched by inner acceptance—a lesson that resonates far beyond the beauty chair. This episode is for anyone seeking to break free from limiting scripts, embrace vulnerability, and create a joyful, aligned life—one honest conversation at a time.

Book plug:
Your Roots Don’t Define You, available via Chris’s socials and major online retailers.

For behind-the-scenes stories and more, listen to the full episode on The Skinny Confidential Him & Her Show.