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Major
Hey there, it's major. Today's episode of the Slowdown is guest hosted by the poet and writer Maggie Smith. I'll be back on Monday, February 17th.
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Maggie Smith
I'm Maggie Smith and this is the Slowdown. When my daughter was small, two or three years old, we used to take her to watch the circus train unload in a nearby suburb. The police blocked off the roads to traffic so that elephants could walk single file up Grandview Avenue past the restaurants and storefronts. I still have an image in my mind of my daughter sitting up on her father's shoulders, transfixed. Recently we watched a nature documentary about elephants and I asked my daughter if.
Unnamed Speaker
She remembered watching them walk up the middle of a city street.
Maggie Smith
She said, that really happened. I thought I dreamed that. Of course she thought she imagined it.
Unnamed Speaker
This fantastical but very true thing. Our earliest memories are blurry.
Maggie Smith
In them, the line between real and.
Unnamed Speaker
Imagined seems especially thin. Today's poem walloped me with its deep.
Maggie Smith
Wisdom about childhood memory and love. Washing the Elephant by Barbara Rass Isn't it always the heart that wants to wash the elephant, begging the body to do it with soap and water, a ladder, hands in tree shade big enough for the vast savannas of your sadness, the strangler fig of your guilt, the cratered full moon's light fueling the windy, spooling memory of elephant.
Unnamed Speaker
What if Father Quinn had said, of.
Maggie Smith
Course you'll recognize your parents in heaven instead of being one with God will make your mother and father pointless? That was back when I was young.
Unnamed Speaker
Enough to love them absolutely, though still.
Maggie Smith
Fear for their place in heaven, imagining.
Unnamed Speaker
Their souls like sponges full of something.
Maggie Smith
Resembling street water after rain.
Unnamed Speaker
Still, my mother sent me every Saturday to confess to wring the sins out of my small, baffled soul, and I.
Maggie Smith
Made up lies about lying, disobeying, chewing gum in church to offer them as.
Unnamed Speaker
Carefully as I handed over the knotted handkerchief of coins to the grocer when my mother sent me for a loaf of wonder, Land o'lakes and two camels. If guilt is the damage of childhood, then eros is the fall of adolescence, or the fall begins there and never.
Maggie Smith
Ends, desire after desire, parading through a.
Unnamed Speaker
Lifetime like the Ringling Brothers elephants made to walk through the Queen's Midtown Tunnel and down 34th street to the garden. So much of our desire, like their.
Maggie Smith
Bulky, shadowy walking after midnight, exiled from.
Unnamed Speaker
The wild and destined for a circus, is with its tawdry gaudiness, its unspoken pathos. It takes more than half a century.
Maggie Smith
To figure out who they were, the few real loves of your life and.
Unnamed Speaker
How much of the rest, the mad breaking heart stickiness, falls away slowly, unnoticed, the way you lose your taste for things like popsicles unthinkingly. And though dailiness may have no place for the ones that have etched themselves in the laugh lines and frown lines.
Maggie Smith
On the face that's harder and harder.
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To claim as your own, often one love of your life will appear in.
Maggie Smith
A dream, arriving with the weight and.
Unnamed Speaker
Certitude of an elephant, and it's always the heart that wants to go out and wash the huge mysteriousness of what they meant, those memories that have only memories to feed them and only you to keep them clean.
Maggie Smith
The Slowdown is a production of American Public Media in partnership with the Poetry Foundation. This project is also supported in part by by the National Endowment for the Arts. On the web@arts.gov to get a poem delivered to you daily, go to slowdownshow.org and sign up for our newsletter and find us on Instagram.
Guest Host: Maggie Smith
Original Release Date: February 12, 2025
Episode Focus: Exploring childhood memories and emotional landscapes through Barbara Ras's poem "Washing the Elephant."
The episode begins with Major Jackson announcing his temporary absence and introducing Maggie Smith as the guest host. Maggie sets the tone for a reflective session centered around personal memories and poetic exploration.
“Hey there, it's Major. Today's episode of the Slowdown is guest hosted by the poet and writer Maggie Smith. I'll be back on Monday, February 17th.”
— Major Jackson [00:00]
Maggie Smith shares a heartfelt childhood memory of taking her young daughter to watch elephants being unloaded from a circus train in a suburban area. This vivid recollection serves as the foundational metaphor for the episode's exploration of memory and imagination.
“When my daughter was small, two or three years old, we used to take her to watch her circus train unload in a nearby suburb. The police blocked off the roads to traffic so that elephants could walk single file up Grandview Avenue past the restaurants and storefronts.”
— Maggie Smith [00:48]
She reflects on the blurred lines between reality and imagination, highlighting how early memories can often feel dreamlike and fragmented.
“Our earliest memories are blurry. In them, the line between real and imagined seems especially thin.”
— Maggie Smith [02:00]
The core of the episode revolves around the poem "Washing the Elephant." Maggie reads the poem aloud, interspersing it with insightful commentary on its themes of memory, love, and the passage from childhood to adulthood.
Key Themes Explored:
Childhood Guilt and Memories: Maggie discusses how the poem captures the essence of childhood guilt and the formative experiences that shape our understanding of love and responsibility.
“If guilt is the damage of childhood, then eros is the fall of adolescence...”
— Maggie Smith [03:33]
Desire and Aging: She reflects on the poem’s exploration of unfulfilled desires and the melancholy of growing older, comparing it to the slow, deliberate march of elephants through a cityscape.
“So much of our desire, like their bulky, shadowy walking after midnight...”
— Maggie Smith [04:05]
Memory Preservation: The poem delves into the fragility of memories and the effort to preserve them, likened to the heart’s desire to “wash the elephant”—a metaphor for cleansing and maintaining the vast, complex memories that define us.
“It's always the heart that wants to go out and wash the huge mysteriousness of what they meant...”
— Maggie Smith [05:17]
Notable Quotes with Timestamps:
“Washing the Elephant by Barbara Ras isn't it always the heart that wants to wash the elephant...”
— Maggie Smith [02:11]
“This fantastical but very true thing. Our earliest memories are blurry.”
— Unnamed Speaker [02:00]
“If guilt is the damage of childhood, then eros is the fall of adolescence...”
— Maggie Smith [03:33]
“So much of our desire, like their bulky, shadowy walking after midnight...”
— Maggie Smith [04:05]
“It's always the heart that wants to go out and wash the huge mysteriousness of what they meant...”
— Maggie Smith [05:17]
Maggie Smith provides a deep analysis of the poem, connecting its imagery to universal experiences of growth, memory, and emotional complexity. She emphasizes how Ras uses the metaphor of washing an elephant to illustrate the monumental task of reconciling with one's past and emotions.
“The poem walloped me with its deep wisdom about childhood memory and love.”
— Maggie Smith [02:11]
She also touches upon the portrayal of familial relationships and the intrinsic fears tied to them, as seen in the poem’s reflection on her parents and the concept of heaven.
“What if Father Quinn had said, of course you'll recognize your parents in heaven instead of being one with God will make your mother and father pointless? That was back when I was young.”
— Maggie Smith [02:54]
Maggie Smith wraps up the episode by reiterating the power of poetry to capture and cleanse the vastness of human emotions and memories. She invites listeners to engage with their own reflections and embrace the moments of pause that poetry facilitates.
“It's always the heart that wants to wash the huge mysteriousness of what they meant, those memories that have only memories to feed them and only you to keep them clean.”
— Maggie Smith [05:17]
She reminds listeners of the collaborative effort behind "The Slowdown," encouraging them to join the daily poetry ritual and stay connected through various platforms.
“The Slowdown is a production of American Public Media in partnership with the Poetry Foundation. This project is also supported in part by the National Endowment for the Arts...”
— Maggie Smith [05:46]
Memory and Imagination: The episode highlights how intertwined our memories are with our imagination, often blurring the lines between what is real and what is perceived.
Emotional Growth: Through the poem, listeners are encouraged to reflect on their emotional journeys from childhood to adulthood, recognizing the lasting impact of early experiences.
Power of Poetry: "Washing the Elephant" serves as a testament to poetry's ability to encapsulate complex emotions and universal human experiences, providing a space for reflection and understanding.
For those seeking daily poetic inspiration and moments of reflection, "The Slowdown: Poetry & Reflection Daily" offers a sanctuary to pause, contemplate, and connect with both emerging and established poets. Subscribe to future episodes at slowdownshow.org and join the community on Instagram.