Episode Overview

Podcast: The Slowdown: Poetry & Reflection Daily
Host: Maggie Smith
Episode Title: 1354: Checkout by Caroline Bird
Date: September 17, 2025

In this episode, host Maggie Smith reflects on the brevity and beauty of life through the lens of poetry, particularly focusing on end-of-life reflection and the importance of cherishing connection and love. Smith introduces and reads Caroline Bird’s poem “Checkout,” contemplating themes of mortality, emotional investment, and the return on love in our lives.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. On the Meaning of Life at the End ([00:51])

• Maggie Smith opens the episode by pondering what truly matters as life draws to a close. She challenges the common narrative around work and productivity:
  • “No one on their deathbed says ‘I wish I’d spent more time at the office.’” (Maggie Smith, 00:51)
  • Smith emphasizes that, in our final moments, we reflect not on material or professional achievements, but on love, memories, and the beauty of the world around us.

2. Personal Anecdote: Visiting Her Grandmother ([01:20])

• Smith shares a poignant memory from her time as an MFA student, visiting her grandmother in a nursing home’s memory care wing:
  • Despite her grandmother’s memory loss, Smith cherishes moments spent together, sitting outside bundled in a blanket.
  • The detail of her grandmother's delight in ice cream bars provided by nurses adds a bittersweet note, highlighting how small joys can hold profound meaning.

3. Hopes for Her Own Passing ([02:00])

• Smith articulates her wishes for her own end-of-life experience, hoping for togetherness, nature, music, and gratitude:
  • “I hope when it's my time that I'm holding the hand of someone I love...outside breathing fresh air, maybe looking at clouds or trees or water...I hope I can feel gratitude for my time on this planet, even though I must go.” (Maggie Smith, 02:00–02:30)
• She acknowledges the emotional difficulty in confronting mortality, sharing vulnerability with listeners:
  • “I have to admit that writing that last paragraph made me cry…it’s enough to make my eyes fill with tears just thinking about having a finite number of days.” (Maggie Smith, 02:40)

4. The Value of Love: “Emotional ROI” ([03:00])

• Smith introduces the concept of “emotional return on investment,” reflecting how love yields enormous meaning in our finite lives:
  • “Today's poem grabbed me...it made me an instant fan of the English poet Caroline Bird...this poem’s speaker has a refreshing take on what I might call emotional ROI, the enormous return on investment when it comes to love.” (Maggie Smith, 03:10)

Featured Poem: “Checkout” by Caroline Bird ([03:30])

Smith reads Bird’s poem in its entirety, which imagines a playful, surreal end-of-life experience:

Poem Highlights

• A posthumous “feedback form” asks the speaker to rate their life (Very good, Good, Average, Bad, Very bad).
• The speaker initially intends to choose “average” but, reminded of a loved one’s face, changes the response to “very good.”
• The poem closes with the speaker telling the angel they’d “definitely come again”—a request met with gentle refusal.

Notable Lines

• “I intend to tick average followed by a rant. Then I recall your face like a cartoon treasure chest glowing with gold light. Tick very good.” (Caroline Bird, as read by Maggie Smith, 03:55)
• “He gives me a soft look, meaning that won’t be possible, but thanks all the same, clicks his pen and vanishes.” (Caroline Bird, as read by Maggie Smith, 04:30)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On the essence of end-of-life reflection:
  “We only get to be with one another for a limited time. Life is short.”
  — Maggie Smith (02:50)

• On memories and gratitude:
  “I hope I can feel gratitude for my time on this planet, even though I must go.”
  — Maggie Smith (02:20)

• On the power of love to transform perspective:
  “Then I recall your face like a cartoon treasure chest glowing with gold light. Tick very good.”
  — Caroline Bird, read by Maggie Smith (03:55)

Timestamps for Important Segments

• [00:51] – Maggie Smith’s introduction: reflecting on what matters at the end of life
• [01:20] – Personal story about her grandmother in memory care
• [02:00] – Expression of personal hopes for her own end-of-life
• [03:00] – Introduction to “emotional ROI” and the day’s poem
• [03:30 – 04:40] – Reading of “Checkout” by Caroline Bird

Closing Thoughts

Rooted in vulnerability and poetic reflection, this episode gently steers listeners toward considering what matters most in life—connections, gratitude, and the quiet, beautiful moments that outshine any accumulation of professional accolades. Maggie Smith’s reading of Caroline Bird’s “Checkout” offers a disarmingly simple yet profound approach to the wishful thinking at life’s end: to have loved deeply, to remember a face that makes everything worthwhile, and, if it were possible, to come back and do it all again.