[encore] 1429: Midlife Crisis by Jane Zwart

Summary

Episode Overview

Podcast: The Slowdown: Poetry & Reflection Daily
Host: Maggie Smith
Episode: [encore] 1429: Midlife Crisis by Jane Zwart
Date: March 25, 2026

This episode of The Slowdown is part of a week of encore presentations, revisiting favorite poems and reflections from the season. Host Maggie Smith explores the idea of "reverse aging," reflecting on her own experience of midlife and the surprising lightness it has brought her spirit. She then introduces and reads Jane Zwart’s poem "Midlife Crisis," which also meditates on the passage of time, the unpredictability of aging, and how perspective transforms our understanding of life’s journey.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Personal Reflection on Reverse Aging & Midlife

• Maggie opens with a personal anecdote about a friend noticing she seems "younger" now.
  • Quote: "A friend of mine said recently, you seem younger now than when I met you. It's like you're reverse aging. I laughed. I'm not reverse aging physically, mind you... If there is going to be evidence of any emotion on my face, let it be joy." — Maggie Smith (00:44–01:47)
• She discusses how, despite new wrinkles and more responsibilities, her spirit feels lighter than before.
• The challenges of midlife are acknowledged: solo parenting, self-employment, caring for aging parents, and maintaining an aging house and self.
  • Quote: "But most days, not all days, but most days, I feel lighter. How strange that with more burdens to carry, I feel less burdened. It doesn't make sense." — Maggie Smith (02:10–02:27)
• Maggie attributes this newfound lightness to perspective:
  • Quote: "The only way I can explain it to myself is that with age comes perspective. I know what matters, and I really do try to let the rest go. Midlife has upended everything I thought about aging." (02:28–02:45)
• She notes the deep irony: as a child, she thought of her current age as "old," but now finds herself feeling young—possibly even younger than she did ten years ago.

2. Introduction & Reading of the Poem

• Maggie introduces Jane Zwart’s poem "Midlife Crisis," admiring its treatment of time and the surprises of midlife.
  • Quote: "I admire how today's poem describes time and what it feels like to reach the middle of one's life only to be surprised at what you find." (03:32–03:39)
• She delivers a full reading of "Midlife Crisis," highlighting the poem's metaphors:
  • Life as a river, with an expected flow and destination.
  • The realization that life is more circular or palindromic than linear.
  • The poem's beautiful paradox: longing for youth yet finding beauty in aging.
  • The inevitability of an end, resulting in a stronger, more intentional “rowing” through life.

Notable Poem Excerpt (Jane Zwart, 03:39–05:37)

"How strange then to learn that being was a palindrome I'd read to its hairpin middle.
I thought it was a river.
How strange hall spun on a backwater to learn that my route ran out and back to feel myself grow younger.
I did not think I would yearn for the silver to change, to rust to be as beautiful bent double unsteady again.
Well, now I know the tributaries of Adam's ale
Now unable to forget there will be an end
with awful strength I row."

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Memorable Moments & Quotes

On Embracing Joy

• "If there is going to be evidence of any emotion on my face, let it be joy." — Maggie Smith (01:17)

On the Mysteries of Aging

• "How strange that with more burdens to carry, I feel less burdened. It doesn't make sense... with age comes perspective. I know what matters, and I really do try to let the rest go." — Maggie Smith (02:10–02:32)

On Revisiting Midlife from a New Perspective

• "Midlife has upended everything I thought about aging. It's not at all what I expected... I feel young. I feel younger in many ways than I did 10 years ago." — Maggie Smith (02:46–03:32)

From "Midlife Crisis" by Jane Zwart

• "How strange then to learn that being was a palindrome I'd read to its hairpin middle." (04:05)
• "To feel myself grow younger. I did not think I would yearn for the silver to change, to rust, to be as beautiful bent double unsteady again." (04:45)
• "Now, unable to forget there will be an end, with awful strength I row." (05:32)

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Segment Timestamps

• 00:44: Maggie’s reflection on "reverse aging" and joy as evidence of a life well-lived
• 02:28: Insight into how perspective changes with age
• 03:32: Introduction to Jane Zwart’s "Midlife Crisis"
• 03:39–05:37: Full reading of the poem

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Conclusion

In this episode, Maggie Smith embodies the ethos of The Slowdown: using poetry to ground us in reflection and to invite gratitude for the paradoxes of aging. The juxtaposition of personal narrative and Jane Zwart's poem underscores how midlife can surprise us with buoyancy, beauty, and a fresh sense of purpose. As Maggie says, “If there is going to be evidence of any emotion on my face, let it be joy.” This sentiment, echoed in the poem’s embrace of both yearning and acceptance, offers listeners both solace and inspiration at any stage of life.

Transcript

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[Maggie]

Liberty hey, it's Maggie. This week we are revisiting some of our favorite poems and reflections from the season so far.

[Maggie Smith]

I'm Maggie Smith and this is the Slowdown. A friend of mine said recently, you seem younger now than when I met you. It's like you're reverse aging. I laughed. I'm not reverse aging physically, mind you. I have more lines around my eyes than ever before and some new ones around my mouth too. The poet in me takes some pleasure in the terms for these wrinkles, crow's feet and marionette lines. It helps me to remind myself that all of this is from smiling. It's all evidence of joy etched into the face I've worn for almost 49 years. If there is going to be evidence of any emotion on my face, let it be joy. I think what my friend meant by reverse aging is that my spirit seems lighter. It feels lighter. But why? My life isn't easier than it was when I was in my twenties. I'm solo parenting two kids, I'm self employed, my parents are aging, my house is aging, I'm aging. I have more big adult challenges than ever. But most days, not all days, but most days, I feel lighter. How strange that with more burdens to carry, I feel less burdened. It doesn't make sense. The only way I can explain it to myself is that with age comes perspective. I know what matters, and I really do try to let the rest go. Midlife has upended everything I thought about aging. It's not at all what I expected. Certainly when I was a child I thought of people in their 40s as old, and now that I'm closer to 50 than 40, I laugh at that. I feel young. I feel younger in many ways than

[Maggie]

I did 10 years ago.

[Maggie Smith]

I admire how today's poem describes time and what it feels like to reach the middle of one's life only to be surprised at what you find. Midlife Crisis by Jane Zwart Some rivers you put into trusting to the livery downstream to the hirelings who will wade into the shallows and hand you from kayak to bank. I thought that was the deal I'd made with time, that I would live until interrupted, that I would be swept where the current said, and at the last a light. How strange then to learn that being was a palindrome I'd read to its hairpin middle. I thought it was a river. How strange hall spun on a backwater to learn that my route ran out and back to feel myself grow younger. I did not think I would yearn for the silver to change, to rust to be as beautiful bent double unsteady again. Well, now I know the tributaries of Adam's ale Now unable to forget there will be an end with awful strength I row.

[Maggie]

The Slowdown is a production of American Public Media in partnership with the Poetry Foundation. To get a poem delivered to you daily, go to slowdownshow.org and sign up for our newsletter. Find us on Instagram @downdownshow and blueskylowdownshow.org. Hey, it's Maggie. Every weekday, the Slowdown delivers the creativity and care of poetry to all free of charge, and your support makes it possible. Donating to the Slowdown is easy. Just go to slowdownshow.org/donate to make your gift in less time than it takes to listen to an episode.